


From One Spark To The Horizon Wide

by AmberDread



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Boarding School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Armitage Hux is a Jerk, Coming of Age, Darkness rises, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Fencing, Fluff and Angst, Gets a bit dark, Gratuitous use of italics, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Mild Smut, Mixed Martial Arts, Original Character(s), Plot, Reylo - Freeform, Slow Build, Smut, Stormpilot, Swearing, Teen Romance, Teenagers, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, Violence, Virgin Kylo Ren, Virgin Rey, games!, shit gets real
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-13 05:37:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 103
Words: 304,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13563987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmberDread/pseuds/AmberDread
Summary: Set in an alternate universe...Rey has arrived at an Elite Boarding School after receiving help from a mysterious benefactor. While integrating herself in her new school she meets some friends, makes some enemies, and finds someone who could be something more.But even if Rey has found acceptance in this new environment, darkness lurks in the corners. Will Rey be able to overcome the struggles of this boarding school, protecting her friends, and even more importantly herself?You can take the girl out of the desert, but you can't take the desert out of the girl.





	1. A New Day

**Author's Note:**

> A/N:  
> This is my first ever fanfic.  
> There is some swearing and violence and eventual smut.  
> Guess you’d class this as Star Wars AU.  
> Please note I’m not a Star Wars buff so please excuse if I get characters/canon/technology a bit wrong etc  
> I do not own Star Wars. (Don’t sue me).

Rey sat awkwardly on a deceptively uncomfortable sofa. She was waiting in the reception of her new school and was very aware that she did not belong there.

 

The last few weeks of her life had been bewildering to say the least, until then, as far back as she could remember at least, her life had been owned by Unkar Plutt. She had spent her time scavenging and stealing the things Plutt required for his junk yard business, his chop shop. She had slept amid scrap metal and broken car parts and eaten whatever she could get her hands on. Most of her days had been in the desert, slaving under the hot sun or working on stripping things down for parts in the yard. Plutt had got her when she was five or six, he had never been sure. Rey had never even found out who had named her, let alone why they had dumped her in Jakku of all places.

 

But a few weeks ago, a nameless benefactor had inexplicably left money in their will to pay for her place at a very prestigious boarding school and then university. There was an odd clause in the will that insisted she go to this particular school in Canto Bight.

No other details were given her, no explanations. Just a bag to pack and a new uniform to put on.

 

The uniform was horrible, restrictive and conservative- a stiff shirt and tie, blazer and a mandatory knee length skirt. She never wore skirts.  _ Never.  _ All her previous school uniforms (when she went) had been whatever jeans she owned and polo shirts, comfy and easy, worn with trainers or boots.  Rey stared down disgustedly at her new shoes, they were stiff and had heels.  _ Heels! _ Not high but still not what she was used to or what was comfortable.

 

She had an awful feeling she would be eaten alive here, and there seemed to be nothing she could do about it.  Someone cleared their throat above her and she snapped her head up. A student, a boy smiled nervously down at her, looking as uncomfortable as she felt.

 

“Hi there, err are you Rey? My names Finn- I’m here to show you around, we have classes together.”  Rey stood up swiftly and Finn swallowed. He was a few inches taller but didn’t seem to realise, he almost seemed intimidated by her, but that was ridiculous.

 

“Yes I’m Rey.” She answered quietly, Finn nodded encouragingly and she couldn’t help a small smile appearing on her face in return, perhaps the other pupils here would not be as stuck up as she had originally thought.

 

“Well ok then, grab your bag and we’ll get going.” They left the stark grey and black reception area, Rey matching her stride to Finn’s slower pace.

“So this place is huge,” He began, “I’ve actually only been here a few months and I still haven’t got used to it. This is the main building, with three other smaller ones, the library, workshop and music and drama building, then you have the gym and pool building and the three dorm buildings. There are also two playing fields, tennis courts and basketball courts as well as some landscaped garden areas where you can hang out when the weather is good, and a wooded area.”

 

Rey kept her mouth from hanging open with an effort. Finn looked at her and grinned.  “Yeah I know, it’s insane how big it is. Did you get a scholarship? You don’t look the usual sort.” Rey raised her eyebrow slightly and he hurriedly continued, “What I mean is you don’t look like a spoiled daddy's girl.”

 

Rey gave a quick involuntary laugh at that and his face relaxed again. “No, I can definitely say I am not  _ that _ … so most kids here, they are not... not like you?”

 

It was his turn to look at her askance, “I mean, that you seem nice and I wasn’t expecting that.”

He smiled at her again, “Sorry to say, at least in my humble opinion, most kids here are class A shits.” He stated flatly.

 

Rey sighed in response, “Well, at least there is you, and you said we have classes together?”

“Yeah, most classes I think, they spilt girls and boys up for anything sporty, though sometimes not for fencing.”

 

Rey stopped mid-stride this time unable to not gape at him, “Did you just say  _ fencing _ ?!”

“Yeah,” He grinned, “Though judging from your expression you’ll be put with girls for that, only advanced girls fight the boys.”

 

Rey rolled her eyes at that and started walking again.  “So. What are the important things I need to know to survive here? I don’t mean where classes are or how good the food is, who are the alphas? Who do I need to avoid? Which teachers are harsh, and are there any rules you can get away with breaking?”

 

Finn raised his eyebrows at her but nodded in understanding. “You want to avoid anyone who hangs out with Phasma Captain, I guess you’d call her the girls alpha and she is massive bitch. Then there’s the two boys… I suppose we can call them factions. Hux is head of one, his first name is Armitage but don’t ever say that where anyone else can hear you, and the other, (whom Hux’s lot hate) is headed up by Kylo Ren, don’t talk to either of them if you want to stay alive… then there’s a sort of sport obsessed bunch but they are mostly alright, guy who is their sort of alpha is called Poe and he’s okay there are a few others but those are the important ones….” He trailed off.

 

Rey huffed another sigh, “It sounds like I’ve just entered a warzone…. So which group are you in?”

Finn grimaced slightly, “Me? I’m not in any group. I don’t really fit in with any of them, don’t know if I ever will.”

Rey smiled slightly, and against her better judgment she said, “Maybe I can be part of your non-group too?”

Finn flashed her his biggest smile yet. “Sounds good.”

 

Rey was surprised by how much she liked him. She had given up on making friends long ago, you didn’t have friends in Jakku, everyone always had some sort of alterior motive, perhaps though, as she knew she’d be here over two years (unless something went drastically wrong, though it wouldn’t surprise her if it did) she could make a friend or two here.

 

“Do you know who you’re sharing a dorm room with yet?” He asked carefully, pulling her back from her thoughts.

She grinned at him, catching him by surprise, “I’ve got a room on my own.” She said smugly and laughed at his jealous expression. This had been one of the very few perks of her new situation. Her own room. Her own space. _ Privacy.  _ For the first time in her life.

“How the hell did you wrangle that?” He asked her.

 

She shrugged. “They were all free, apparently all the girls like to share with friends,” She still couldn’t believe that someone would voluntarily give up personal space like that but she was not going to complain about it. 

 

“Huh,” he grunted. “Guess that's a major difference between girls and boys.” Then he looked at her, “Present company excepted though.”

 

A bell rang, making them both jump, it sounded more like an actual bell than in other schools. The noise made Rey’s mouth go dry and her stomach flip uncomfortably.  Finn blanked his expression as pupils started to flow out of classrooms and eddy around them, “Guess I’ll need to tell you more at lunch. Our first class is here, history.”

 

Rey nodded and cleared her face of expression too as they walked in, “Do we sit wherever or do we have set desks?”

“Theoretically where ever but in reality where ever the in crowd don’t want to. So generally you’re safe in the middle away from the window, unless it is really sunny like today, then we sit by the window so they don’t get the sun in their eyes.”

Rey nodded, it made sense, the rebellious kids would want the back seats, the clever kids would want the front and the cool bored ones would want to look out the windows. 

It was the same in every school that did not have a fixed seating arrangement. She took a seat in the middle by the wall, and Finn sat next to her getting out a laptop and turning it on.

 

She took her new one out of her bag and set it on the table in front of her awkwardly. “Err Finn, I’m not very used to computers and I’ve never had a laptop before,” His eyebrows climbed into his hair,”Would you mind helping me out a bit till I get the hang of it?”

 

“Sure.” he said, clearly surprised. “Though they are more tablets than laptops really. What did you say your scholarship was for again?”

 

She shifted uncomfortably. “I didn’t… I’m not here on a scholarship, it’s… complicated.”

“Okay…” he answered slowly. “You’ll have to fill me in later. Let’s have a look at what you’ve got.”

 

He whistled in appreciation as he took the tablet from her. “Nice, this has only been out a few months. My scholarship was for IT and swimming by the way.” He added absently and he looked over the slim black case and then opened it.

 

Rey covertly studied the other students as they entered and sat down as Finn fiddled with the tablet. The girls seemed to all be made up and well groomed, not a hair out of place, sporting designer bags and haughty expressions. The boys all seemed to be artfully messy and exuded an air of arrogance as they swaggered in, joking with each other.

 

Rey felt herself shrink in her chair. She knew her hair style of three buns would be a little loose by now, stray tendrils would be wispy about her face and neck. She wore no makeup and her fingernails were chewed and probably a bit grubby.

 

Finn settled the tablet gently in front of her and quickly showed her an open window to write in, thankfully it was vaguely similar enough to the computers she had used previously for her to work out what to do.

 

The talk quieted as the teacher came out of the small office behind the whiteboard and desk.  Her gimlet gaze swept the room and fastened on Rey. Rey swallowed.  “We have a new pupil today everyone.” She took in Rey’s expression and her’s softened minutely. 

 

To Rey’s enormous relief she did not make Rey stand up and introduce herself, Rey was pretty certain she must had held the same expression a rock rabbit does when hit by headlights.  The teacher merely gestured to her and went on, “This is Rey White, she comes to us from…  _ Jakku, _ ” The room rippled with derisive whispers that she cut short,” I expect everyone to make her very welcome. Now, open the text on the Empire and we shall begin.”

 

Finn quickly opened another window on her screen which turned out to be a digital textbook. Rey smiled her thanks and tried to breathe silently while her heart beat slowed down and she listened to the lesson, acutely aware of the considering stares she was receiving from everyone other than Finn.

 

After the lesson, they waited till the others had left the classroom before exiting themselves. “That was Miss Holdo, she is strict but nice. She normally makes new students stand up, but your face went so blank I think she was worried you’d faint.”

Rey smiled at him wryly. “I really,  _ really _ hate being the centre of attention- and I am not good with new people… actually with just people in general.”

“Got it. Okay, so it’s lunch time, you weren’t here for the first few lessons, shall we grab some food and go somewhere quiet where we can talk undisturbed?” His eyes narrowed suddenly and he yanked her down another corridor and into an empty classroom pulling her with him behind the door.

 

She was just starting to wrench away from him when she saw his expression and stilled herself.

There were footsteps outside and male laughter, it sounded like a fairly large group but hey carried on past, and Finn let out a sigh of relief.

“Sorry, sometimes it's just better not be be in some peoples way- that was Hux and his followers”.

Rey’s tensed muscles relaxed a little and she nodded in understanding.

They made it to the refectory without incident, Rey was aware of being stared at, knew she was being talked about, but she did her best to ignore it.

The refectory was large, the tables and chairs provided were wooden and looked comfortable, the serving staff were smart and mostly silent, the room had one wall made mostly of glass and she could see some picnic benches outside. There was a large hot food counter, a salad bar, snack bar, ready made sandwich and wrap counter, drinks refrigerator and a hot drink machine.

 

It was like a restaurant. They grabbed sandwiches, apples and bottles of water before beating a hasty retreat out a glass door onto the patio that held the picnic benches, it was apparently early Autumn, (seasons didn’t mean much to her) and while sunny the wind was still cool. To Rey, who had been used to the heat of Jakku far to the south, it was unpleasantly cold.

But it also meant they were on their own, which was infinitely preferable to being inside.  Her back prickled uncomfortably so she picked a table to the side with her back to a wall that jutted out of the end of the refectory, this way she could see from both sides and no one could come up from behind her.

 

Finn nodded in approval at her choice and seated himself next to her, clearly he didn’t like leaving his back open either.  “Sorry its cold, but I figured you’d prefer this to inside with  _ them. _ ”

Rey nodded, considering how odd that already the two of them were  _ us  _ and  _ them _ , it felt natural- hanging out with Finn, and in turn it felt odd that it already felt natural.

Apparently Finn was hungry as he ripped into his sandwiches (she noticed he had swiped two rounds).

“So,” he said through a mouthful, “What’s your deal then?”

Rey’s mouth quirked as she slowly unwrapped her sandwich, “Guess I am not going to get away without telling you then?” He answered by rolling his eyes at her and she sighed.

 

Simple would be easiest she decided. “I’m an orphan, I’ve lived in a junk yard in Jakku, then suddenly a few weeks ago I’m told some random guy who I’ve never met left money in his will for me to go to school here.”She shrugged at his flabbergasted expression.”That’s all I know. No one would tell me his name or where he lived or anything.”

Finn gave a large swallow. “Holy shit!” He said fervently. “Rey, I’m an orphan too!”

It was Rey’s turn to look surprised. She had not expected that, not in a million years.

Finn grinned at her, “Though I’ve been in the same foster home for the last few years but they didn’t really like me, I worked my arse off to get a scholarship to anywhere, so I could leave,” He mouth twisted wryly, “I thought anywhere would be better, but I ended up here… don’t get me wrong, I’m not ungrateful exactly, I just thought I’d at least make a few friends... “ He smiled again, a sunny happy grin “Guess I have at least one now though.”

Rey returned his smile, the expression feeling odd and unfamiliar on her face.

 

Finn cleared his throat suddenly, then started on his other sandwich, “Ok so I’ve got a map I made myself of the campus, I can put it on your tablet, it is similar to the one the school gives out but I added some more useful information like what places to avoid at certain times and where good short cuts are. You’ve got a fairly easy day today, tomorrow you’ll have fencing though with Master Luke, who can be really weird, you’ll understand when you meet him and forewarned is forearmed as they say.”

Rey frowned, “They do?” She hadn’t heard that one before but it made sense to her.

“So English after this and sciences, then you finish with swimming, I won’t be there with you for that- sorry, its a girls only class…. What’s wrong?”

Rey’s face had drained of colour, “I can’t swim.” She mumbled awkwardly.

He looked incredulous, “Like not at all? Are you sure?”

“I’ve never been in anything deeper than a bath so I am pretty sure I can’t- what am I going to do?” Desperation crept into her voice and he patted her hand absently.

 

“Err okay, right, well… did no one ask you this when you joined? How come you never mentioned it to anyone?”

“Everything happened so fast, it’s been like a whirlwind picked me up and just dropped me here.”

“Okay, well, eat up and we’ll go find Master Luke, he is head of Physical Education and I know where we can find him.”


	2. Fight Club

 

Rey had no appetite suddenly and pushed the remainder of her sandwich away but pocketed her apple for later.  Finn absent-mindedly took the rest of her sandwich and ate it as they walked away from the refectory windows and joined a path that led to a large building ahead.

 

The path had a basketball court on either side of it, the chain link fences made it feel like walking through a cage.  The gym, though in truth it looked closer to a leisure centre than any school gym she had seen, was obviously fairly new and  _ huge _ . 

 

They entered a sort of lounge reception area, with low sofas and drinks machines, offices to either side, with the doors shut.  Behind one of the doors they could hear someone talking loudly, angrily. Finn shrugged uncomfortably and Rey realised this must be Master Luke's room.

 

They settled lightly on a sofa, trying not to stare at the door as they waited. It abruptly flew open hitting the wall with a loud bang, making Rey and Finn jump. A ridiculously tall boy stood in the doorway, breathing angrily, he was in uniform but his tie and collar were loose and instead of a blazer he wore a long black duster coat.

 

He turned his glare on them and Finn murmured  _ “Shit!” _ under his breath. For some reason, Rey found the sight of the boy irritated her and returned his glare with a flat look of her own.  There was perhaps a flash of surprise that crossed his face, but it happened so quickly she couldn’t be sure, then he was striding away and out the door, his feet hitting the ground as if he imagined it had a face he didn’t like.

 

Finn cleared his throat as he stood, “So, that was Kylo Ren.”

“Was it.” Rey said as she watched him disappear down the path, he was almost gone already. Finn looked at her oddly for moment before tugging on her wrist to follow him to the office. He knocked quickly on the door that still hung open and went in after a surprisingly relaxed voice called for them to enter.

 

Master Luke, at least she supposed this was him, was sitting cross-legging on top of his desk and looked as if he was just about to meditate. He wore loose clothing, a little like a Karate Gi in khaki and beige, his hair and beard were a rather shaggy greying blonde and he had piercing blue eyes.  He didn’t get off the desk but motioned easily to two chairs that looked as though they had been pushed aside by a walking thunderstorm.

 

“Nice to see you, Finn,” He smiled slightly before turning to Rey, “And you must be Rey White. Sit, sit. How can I help you?”

Rey was suddenly and embarrassingly tongue tied, Finn noticed her expression and spoke for her, much to her relief, “Err yeah, thanks Master Luke. It’s Rey’s first day and I’m showing her round and I just found out she can’t swim. At all. But she has swimming at 6th period.”

To his credit Master Luke didn’t laugh at her, but smiled gently at her, “And when Finn says you can’t swim at all, he is right?”

 

Finn sent him an eye roll he didn’t see and Rey found her tongue worked again. “Yes, I mean no I can’t swim. I’ve never even tried. I’m from Jakku.” She finished lamely as if that were explanation enough, though on second thought it probably was. It was in the desert after all, and it was a poor region, even a bath was a luxury most people couldn’t afford.

 

“I understand. I will try and sort out some private lessons for you, in the meantime, perhaps you would like to join the boys for fencing? Finn can partner you.”

Finn looked surprised but not displeased, and Rey flushed thinking Master Luke did not understand as much as he thought he did, “Ah, I don’t know how to fence either though”.

Luke smiled again, “That’s okay, Finn didn’t a few months ago either.”

 

Rey flushed a little, more at herself this time. Of course Finn wouldn’t have fenced before.

“I’m quite good with a quarterstaff though,” she blurted out, then snapped her teeth shut with a click, mystified as to why she has said that.

 

Finn was gaping at her, and Master Luke laughed. “Are you? You will have to show me later. I will speak to Miss Crouch about the swimming and I will see you later. Finn make sure she gets the right kit and then get to your next classes, lunch will be over soon.”

Master Luke had already closed his eyes, sitting atop his desk serenely as they left.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo stormed away from his uncles infuriatingly calm face, kicking the chairs out of his way and flung the office door open, it banged into the wall make two people waiting on the waiting area’s sofa jump.

He glared at them, while he tried to regulate his breathing but couldn’t seem to get the better of it quite yet, the black boy he knew of but they girl was new. Not that he cared. He almost smirked at the boys whispered profanity, but the girls expression stopped him for a moment.

No one had looked at him like that for some time, flat and unimpressed, not nervous, envious, fearful, angry, lustful, adoring, respectful… No _. Unimpressed.  _ He banished his surprised expression as soon as it appeared on his face, she was nothing, and she would soon learn that.

He left the building, clenching his fists at his side, pounding the path with his new rocks. If his uncle interfered with his relationship with his mother one more time, he would  _ destroy _ his fucking office.

Afterall  _ she _ was the one that had insisted he went to the same school she taught at, it had been  _ her _ idea to conceal the fact that he was her son from the other students ‘To make life easier for him’, so what if he had taken to his new name so entirely? So what if he didn’t see her much anymore, this is what she had started.  _ Her _ . Not  _ him _ .

It was too near lessons to go and blow of steam fencing or pounding a punch bag, but then again he only had drama next. He altered his path and carried on walking past the buildings and out onto the fields. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Finn led Rey up a flight of stairs and into a large mirrored room with a soft slightly bouncy floor, and made a beeline for a cupboard that was helpfully labelled ‘Fencing’.

 

At least she had assumed it would be a cupboard but it was large, walls and shelving holding numerous bits of clothing and equipment. Finn led her up and down stacking bits and pieces into her arms as he went, there was a lot of it. “How do you know this will fit me?” She asked him a one point. 

 

“They come in standard sizes, you’re really skinny so I’m giving you smalls, there is some room for adjustment as these pieces are school equipment, I’ve given you kit made for right handers, you’ll need to try on the gloves probably and find shoes that fit you,” He grabbed the bundle of things from her and waved her over to a rack of shoes for her to try while he manhandled everything else into a kit bag.

 

She quickly found shoes in her size marveling at how unexpectedly light weight they were and grabbed a pair of gloves as they hurried out and down the stairs, they went in a door on the other side of the lounge area and Fin stopped, pointing at a door with  **GIRLS** written on it.  “Go in and put the bag in a locker, then we need to get going.”

 

Rey trotted through the door quickly, it was a large changing room, she barely took anything in but the lockers, she shoved the bag in, closed the door and yanked the key out as quickly as she could.  As they walked back to the main building she checked the number on the key before putting it in her pocket.

 

“Thanks for all your help today Finn” She said quietly. “You’ve made what I thought was going to be hellish not so bad. So thanks.”

Finn grinned easily at her, “Days not over yet!” and laughed at her expression. “Seriously though, I’m glad you’re here… word of advice though, maybe next time you see Kylo Ren- don’t glare at him?”

 

“I didn’t glare at him!” She said indignantly, then, “I didn’t did I? He won’t be in the fencing class later will he?” She finished worriedly. 

“Well you did a bit, and no, he won’t be in our class, he’s the year above us and he’s in the advanced classes anyway. He calls himself a  _ knight. _ ” Finn said snickering, then looked around to make sure there was no one to overhear.

 

Just then the bell rang and they made their way to the top floor of the main building and into their English class.  The English teacher, Miss Laceash, was not as perceptive as Miss Holdo, or just didn’t care about Rey’s nerves and she was made to stand up and introduce herself. Rey kept it short- her name and where she had come from, (which Mrs Laceash didn’t appear to appreciate), then sat back down, scrubbing her sweaty palms on her thighs. Her knees were cold and the long socks she wore itched.

 

They worked on interpreting poetry, Rey and Finn snickering behind their breath at each others answers, as if they had been friends for years.  So far most of the other students had ignored Rey after a quick judgemental stare, a few of the girls had shot her nasty looks, a few of the boys considering looks, to Finn’s amusement she didn’t seem to notice any of it and like him, was perfectly happy being ignored.

 

Science passed in a whirl of confusion, Finn trying to help her even though he himself struggled, their teacher Mr Cardwhit held them back a bit and kindly handed Rey a few textbooks to go over in her free time.  She had a feeling she would need extra books from almost all her classes. 

Then it was fencing. Rey was even more nervous about this than any other class. It was inevitable her presence with the boys fencing and not the girls swimming would be remarked upon. But there wasn’t really anything she could do about it, this would also be the first time she was away from Finn’s comforting presence and she was just going to have to deal with it.

 

As they split up in the waiting area, Finn promised to wait there after changing so they could ascend the stairs together.  Rey squeezed the key in her hand till it hurt and walked quickly into the girls changing room. Inside it was noisy as the others changed, laughing and chatting together, there was a slight lull as she entered but the noise picked up again almost immediately, which she was grateful for. 

She was glad to see a few cubicles where she could get changed privately, she would be the only one using them but she would be sticking out anyway by dressing in fencing gear rather than swimming attire.

 

It took her a little while to work out exactly how to put some of the clothing on, the socks and and breeches were self explanatory but the jacket caused her a few problems.  She put the mask on, it covered her face making her feel less vulnerable and she was pleased to find she didn’t have to take her hair out of its three buns to wear it.

 

Before she left the cubicle she packed away all her things into the kit bag, readied her key and exited as fast as she could, stashed her bag and was almost to the exit when someone noticed.  “Why is the scavenger scum dressed in Whites? Doesn’t she know we’re swimming today?” one girl called to another, laughing.

 

Rey felt her ears burn at the insult but she had heard much, much worse in her time and bolted out the door before she could catch anymore. She nearly knocked Finn over in her haste.  He righted himself and laughed at her, “That eager are you?”

She smiled but realised he couldn’t see her under the mask, “No, I just wanted to get out of there, the vultures were circling.” She answered.

Finn frowned then nodded in understanding. He was carrying his mask in his hand but after realising she wasn’t going to take hers off, he put his on in a show of solidarity.

“Understood. Let’s get up there, I think we are the last.”

 

Rey trotted after him up the stairs, “Sorry, took me a while to work out how to put some of this on.”

Finn “ Ah shit biscuits, sorry, I should have thought of that and showed you!” He gave her a look over and grinned, “You look perfect though. With the mask on you could be a boy… _ oh fuck. _ Like I don’t mean that as an insult, I just meant you won’t stick out cos… well… err “ He stuttered over himself.

Rey choked on her laughter, then cut it as they entered the large studio together.

The other students were standing around with their masks in their hands, chatting quietly in groups, Master Luke was leaning against the wall but stood up as they entered, nodding in recognition at Rey and Finn but otherwise making no comment as he moved to the centre of the room.

 

Immediately the other boys grew quiet and loosely gathered around him, Rey and Finn at the back.  Rey didn’t understand most of the instructions he gave out, they involved a lot of words she didn’t know but they broke off into pairs and one three; she realised that was because of her but no one seemed that bothered by it. 

 

“Ok, you know they drill, warm up first then come and get your foils from me. I will be coming round to you as you practice, work on the moves you were perfecting last lesson for now.”  Rey and Finn moved into a corner of the room away from the others and started stretching, Rey mostly copying Finn.

 

“Bloody ashes, but you’re flexible,” Rey jerked her head up to see two boys looking down at her, then quickly scrambled up from where she had been stretching her legs.  “What’s your name anyway? Master Luke didn’t say.” 

 

Rey opened her mouth and shut it again as Luke came up quietly behind them. “This is Rey, she has joined us temporarily. But I am quite sure that I did not instruct you to chat Ryleaf. If you are done stretching, put on your mask and start practice.”

Rey could see their their eyebrows rise over her name, but they left swiftly all the same.

 

Luke smiled slightly as he watched them go, then turned back to Rey and Finn, Rey noticed he was holding two absurdly thin looking swords.  “These are foils, if you were learning elsewhere you would probably start with plastic ones but I like to start as I mean to go on.” He handed one to each of them and Rey took hers cautiously, feeling the weight and balance in her hand as Luke watched.

 

“I’d like to see how you do.” He said abruptly, then almost looked surprised at himself but carried on. “Finn, if you will, spar with her. The only things you need to know now Rey, are to aim for the right arm and body only. When I say  _ En Garde _ , I mean take your position to start, three paces away from each other, sword arm up and knees slightly bent, I will then say  _ Ready _ and then  _ Fence _ ! that is when you start, as soon as I or Finn says  _ Fast _ ! You are to stop immediately. Is that clear?”

Rey nervously bobbed her head in assent.

 

Luke smiled at her, “When I say En Garde, take three deep breaths in and centre yourself.” He and stepped back. “En Garde.”

Rey breathed in and emptied herself of emotion, she imagined she was back in Jakku, crossing the market at night, loose limbed and ready for anything. She took another breath, she focused on Finn’s Foil, deep breath, she could hear her pulse, feel the vibrations of the other students impacts through the floor.

 

“Ready” Luke said,  the foil was an extension of her, like her staff or bow would be.

“Fence!” Her nerves flew away from her as Finn advanced, things seemed to slow, Finn feinted left and right and she met his foil easily, then he lunged and she parried easily then riposted and with a flick of her wrist sent his foil spinning away from him; she had barely moved.

“Fast!” Luke called as Finn’s sword clattered to a stop several feet away. “Rey take your mask off.” Luke ordered.

She swallowed, had she done something wrong? She took off her mask and looked at him worriedly.

“You did say you had not fenced before?” He asked,

Rey’s mouth was dry so she just shook her head, Finn had his mask off now and was looking at her oddly.

She wet her lips, “Did I do something wrong?”

“Not as such,” Luke replied absently as he looked at Finn’s foil on the floor.

“Crispaul, Ryleaf, come here a moment please.” Luke raised his voice, “The rest of you, carry on.”

The two boys who had spoken to her at the beginning came over eagerly, “Ryleaf, you and Finn go off and work together for a few minutes.” Luke waved his hand vaguely, they went, Finn dragging his feet.

“Crispaul. I’d like you to spar with Rey here. Rey, as you were before, mask on, three deep breaths first.”

Rey frowned a little but complied, Crispaul shrugged slightly and stepped three paces away.

“En Garde.” Luke said, she took a breath- she hadn’t felt this calm in days, she took another.

“Ready.” Luke sounded further away than he was. Another breath, she could feel Crispaul shift impatiently. 

“Fence!”

Crispaul was faster than Finn, obviously more experienced and had none of Finn’s hesitation towards her, and yet she saw his moves before he made them, parried and riposted deftly, with minimal effort, Crispaul slowed, became more cautious, testing her as if he were suddenly unsure, so Rey attacked in a quick succession of moves, the foil held lightly in her hand, her breathing measured, she suddenly bent lower and brought her foil up under his to tap him on his chest, then brought her wrist back to flick his foil out of his hand.

“Fast.” Luke called.

Crispaul ripped his mask off to stare incredulously at her, she turned to look at Luke who was now studying her carefully.

She pulled her mask off too, surprised to find she was sweating. “Did I do something wrong again, Master Luke?”

To her surprise he barked a brief laugh, “Wrong? No, no, I changed your partner because I wanted to see if you were really that good or if Finn was going easy on you… take a brief rest, then go to that cupboard and pick out a staff; I want to see what else you can do. Crispaul, well done lad, you’ll work with Finn and Ryleaf, I’ll come instruct you now.”

Somewhat bemusedly Rey wandered over the the cupboard indicated, it was smaller than the fencing cupboard and seemed to hold miscellaneous weapons, there was a rack with various quarter staffs, differing in length and thickness, after hefting and discarding a few she picked one that felt like it belonged in her hand, it was a bit taller than her and about 10 centimetres around, the wood was smooth and comforting in her grip.

When she exited she found a tub with water bottles in and helped herself to one as she watched the other students; she felt rather guilty watching Finn, the other boys weren’t going easy on him.

Luke walked past her into the cupboard she had just vacated, “I’ll just be a moment Rey.”

She had a couple of swigs of water then moved into some space to get a feel for the staff she had chosen.

It felt right in her hands, much better than the foil had. She used it to limbre up her shoulders and back- the fencing hadn’t required much of that but this would.

A throat cleared behind her and she straightened and turned to find Luke facing her, quarterstaff in his hands. 

“I am to fight you?” She asked, not a little surprised.

He nodded, eyes crinkling at the corners. “These students haven’t trained with a staff yet. We will follow the same principles as fencing for now, though the staffs are much more dangerous than the foils, so try and make any hits lighter if you can. Leave the mask off, it may be more of a hindrance for this style of sparring.”

Rey nodded, already breathing out, floating in an empty calm:  _ this _ she could do.

“En Garde,” Luke said, face a picture of serenity.

Breathe out.

“Ready.”

Breathe out.

“Fence.”

She was surprised when Luke came at her like a whirlwind, but she met him like a storm, the loud cracks of their staffs hitting each other echoing loudly in the large room.  Rey revelled in the movement, she and luke ducking, jumping, twisting to attack or defend. She realised dimly that they were using much more space, which meant the other students had stopped sparring, but it wasn’t important. They fought on. 

She started to tire, Luke may look old but his body didn’t seem to know it, he moved fluidly, he was only a little taller than her but was heavier and the impact it caused when hitting hers was beginning to be a problem.

Her concentration waived as she tried to work out what to do and Luke caught her with a tap to the wrist that sent her staff flying from her hand.

The both stopped, Rey breathing hard now, Luke less so, but still deeper than normal. There was a rather startling round of clapping and Rey’s focus came back to the room, she was suddenly awkward again, cheeks blushing from more than the exercise now.

Luke made a slight bow, “All right now, back to what you were doing please.”

The other students started milling about, getting back into sparring, though there was a lot more chatter than there had been. Luke seemed to accept it and beckoned for Rey to follow him with her staff back to where the water was.

“Have a drink then do some gentle stretching to warm down.” Luke said as he took a bottle for himself and drank.

Rey let the cool water trickle down her throat gratefully. 

“I’d say you were more than ‘pretty good with a quarterstaff’” Luke said drily. “And you clearly know how to centre yourself and predict your opponent's moves. Do you do any form of martial arts? Or archery or the like?”

Rey shrugged a little self-consciously. “I used a recurve bow to hunt, and I don’t know about martial arts but I could hold my own in hand to hand, depending on my opponent.”

Luke nodded. “Have you ever used the staff against an opponent using a different weapon?”

Rey nodded in turn, “Yes, knives, sabres and bats and such.” She shrugged again.

“How tired are you feeling?” He asked her with a sudden mischievous smile.

“Not too bad.” Rey said cautiously, unsure what was going on in his head.

“How would you feel about, shall we say, educating a student of mine- sparring with your staff whilst he uses a practice sabre?”

Rey considered for a moment, but she was enjoying herself and was happy to continue working till Luke told her to go. “Sure” She answered and he grinned.

He wandered away again, stepping lightly, pausing to instruct as needed.

Rey stretched out her muscles then went through some basic staff exercises. Finn joined her as he waited his turn to sparr in his group of three.

“Fuck me, you looked like some vengeful goddess fighting Luke. Are you sure you’re human?” He asked, sounding almost half serious.

Rey shifted her feet, embarrassed, “Fairly sure, I never knew my parents though so it’s possible I’m not.” She joked and he laughed.

“I think you may have some problems with the others now though, half are in love with you and half of them want to fight you.”

Rey blushed, “That’s ridiculous!”

Finn just rolled his eyes at her and grinned.

Rey changed the subject, “Will you wait for me after you’ve changed so I can go with you to the dorm? Master Luke wants me to stay behind for something but I’ll be along after that, if you don’t mind that is.”

“Sure,” Finn said curiously,”What does he want you for-”

Rey didn’t reply as Luke spoke up, “Okay everyone, that’s it for today. I’d like you all to leave by the back door today,” he cut off any protests “Don’t worry it isn’t raining, or even very cold, I’m sure you’ll all survive.” 

“See you in the waiting area,” Finn called over his shoulder as he grabbed a bottle of water and headed out another door Rey hadn’t noticed before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked, comments welcome ^_^


	3. Beast In Black

Luke nodded to her as the others left, “If you don’t mind, could you wear a mask for this?”

Rey nodded, “I’ll give it a try.” She went to put her own back on but Luke handed her another, slightly different to her first, the visibility was better and it was lighter but felt tougher.

She swung the staff about to see how the mask changed the visibility but so long as she didn’t let herself be distracted by it, she would be fine.

She had just straightened up and was standing nonchalantly leaning on the staff when the main door was pushed open with rather more force than necessary.

The figure that strode into the room was wearing the same kit she was, except it was all black.

It was Kylo Ren, and he was carrying his own weapon.

Rey’ heart did an uneasy lurch in her chest at the sight of him; he really was huge, not just tall but broad and muscled too. Finn’s warnings came back to her, but then she looked at Luke, who seemed perfectly at ease and she felt herself relax. Luke had seen her fight and she couldn’t believe he would ask her to do this if it was as one sided as their disparate sizes would indicate. She would have speed and probably agility on her side, and she had fought against a sabre before, Kylo Ren it seemed, had not fought anything other than fencing weapons.

He paused a few steps into the room, clearly surprised there was someone other than Luke there, then his face smoothed into blankness with a hint of a lip curl.

“Kylo, before we start today I would like to see how you do against a quarterstaff- it is time we started evolving your skills and this would be a good place to start. I have a volunteer for you to work with.” Luke waved casually at Rey.

Kylo looked her up and down and snorted softly before saying, “Are you sure he is up to it? He looks rather small to me.” His voice was surprisingly deep, slightly rough in tone.

Rey scowled in his direction from behind her mask but said nothing.

Luke gave a slight smile, “Skill and size are two different things, you should know that by now Kylo.” 

Rey noticed he hadn’t corrected Kylo’s assumption she was a boy and wondered briefly why, then dismissed the thought and started breathing out as she flexed her wrists on her staff.

Kylo shrugged as if to say it was out of his hands and started to warm up. Luke spoke as he did, informing him the rules would be more or less the same, encouraged them to use the whole space, reiterated that if he was to call Fast, Kylo must stop immediately. 

Rey barely heard, she had slipped out of the world into a bubble of calm, she loved this feeling, had cultivated it in Jakku where she needed to be better than anyone else to survive. She reminded herself that almost all the fights she had been in were with boys or men bigger than she was.

“If you are ready?” Luke’s voice slipped into her bubble and she nodded calmly.

Kylo had donned his mask, a faceless opponent was slightly harder to read but she would be able to read his body to some extent.

They stepped towards each other till there was 6 feet between them and Luke told them to stop there.

“En Garde” came Lukes voice.

She was in deeper than she had been before, the world narrowed down to her body and Kylo’s.

“Ready” Luke called.

Kylo had his knees slightly bent, one leg in front of the other, his free arm down behind his back while his sabre arm was level with his waist, sword angled slightly up pointing towards Rey

By contrast Rey’s stance was seemingly relaxed, joints loose and staff held diagonally out from her body.

“Fence!” Luke said, though it seemed from faraway.

Kylo surged towards her like a landslide, his body all aggression and brute strength but he was also  _ fast _ .

She had not expected that, but it didn’t matter, she was faster. He had clearly been thinking it would all be over with his show of strength and he grunted in surprise as she met his sabre and deflected it with ease, then butted the staff against his chest and danced away again.

His demeanor changed slightly as he realised this wouldn't be over so easily, he started testing her, trying to learn how she moved, how the staff worked.

She couldn’t have that, couldn’t let him have the space to study her style, so she attacked, slightly frustrated by the rule of only aiming for the body or right arm, she feinted low swiping at his legs before reversing and hitting his shoulder, then she rained down swipes and blows, pushing him backwards, always on the wrong foot.

Then he got angry and his style changed again, his cuts and stabs more forceful than before, putting all of his considerable strength behind his arm now and each time her staff met his sabre her arms felt the impact as an increasingly strong vibration. 

Because of her extra reach he had not touched her with his sabre, until he did something completely unexpected. 

Rather than meet her staff with his sabre he turned and took the impact on his shoulder, then rammed into her body on his way past her; she rolled taking her staff with her, flipped herself back up and away bringing her staff round as he rushed her again.

So he was going to break the rules was he? She smiled as he ducked under her staff and swiped at her knee. That was fine, she had hated the rules anyway.

So Rey cheated too. To her amusement he seemed surprised that she did, as if it was only something  _ he _ should be able to do.

She clipped his knee, forcing him down onto the other instead of falling, then she butted his shoulder, making him struggle to keep his balance, she pulled back and cracked his right wrist knocking his sabre away, he went to roll back but her staff was at his throat, pressing him back till he had nowhere else to go.

“REY, FAST!” Luke shouted. She realised this wasn’t the first time he had called to end their fight, but she hadn’t heard till now.

Kylo was breathing hard, his anger was so palpable she could taste it.

She withdrew, taking a few steps away then turning as Luke deemed it safe to now come close to them.

“When I say  _ Fast  _ Kylo, you stop. Remember? Rey, that goes for you too.” Luke said, his voice rather less calm that it had been previously.

Kylo got up inelegantly and ripped off his mask, throwing it down, burning eyes surrounded by his sweaty hair. “He cheated!” He shouted guestering at Rey angrily.

He sounded like a petulant child, Rey smirked behind her mask.

Luke rolled his eyes, “Yes, she did, but you cheated first, Kylo.”

“I just used my shoulder- he… wait, did you just say  _ she _ ?” His voice climbed an octave at the end of the sentence. His mouth working incredulously.

Rey took that moment to take off her mask and looked back at him calmly, she had decided letting him see her smirk would be a mistake.

Kylo gaped at her, then looked at Luke, “Why the hell am I sparring with a fucking girl?”

Luke raised his eyebrows, Rey could swear he was trying not to laugh, “That girl, that ‘on the small side’ girl, just beat your sorry arse..”

Kylo towered over Luke, full of barely contained rage, Luke just looked at him and sighed.

“That’ll be all for now Rey, Kylo and I are going to the gym so he can attack a punch bag. Please put your staff away before you go and change. Perhaps some warming down exercises would be a good idea too. Thank you for your help and I hope your first day at Canto Bight Academy has been a good one.”

Rey gave him a small smile, “Thank you, Master Luke.” She gave him a nod and went to put her staff away, turning her back on Kylo Ren, whose now carefully blank face still managed to somehow exude fury.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo hadn’t been this full of rage for some time. He had been  _ beaten _ . By a  _ girl. _ On her first day at school. Who the hell was she? Where the fuck had she learned to fight like that and why hadn’t she been afraid of him? Of his size?

Each of these thoughts were punctuated by a blow of his fists on the punch bag. He was imagining Luke’s insufferably calm face.  He recognised her now, the girl that had been with that 2187. The girl that had given him such a flat look when he had left Luke’s office earlier today.

“You’re not listening to a word I’m saying are you?” Luke’s raised voice broke through Kylo’s angry haze and he turned, sweat flicking off his face and hair.

“Not really no.” He growled.

Luke gave an exaggerated sigh. “I was saying, that through defeat you gain  _ wisdom _ . That is how learning some things work...”

Kylo rolled his eyes, “But she cheated.” He said under his breath but Luke heard him and snorted derisively. 

“Yes, she did. She had been holding back, which must have been hard for her, but then you cheated and in her eyes that meant she could too. She does not have the discipline you do, or that you are meant to, anyway.”

Kylo turned back to the punch bag, raising a fist to start pummeling again, but Luke’s next words stopped him.

“If it makes you feel any better, I sparred with her earlier and she almost won. It was a near thing, and I suspect if she hadn’t had to stick to my rules, it would have had a different outcome.” Luke said shamelessly.

Kylo looked at him hard, half suspecting a joke, but no, Luke wasn’t that sort of man,

“Where does she come from? Who trained her?” He found himself asking.  _ Why did he care? _

Luke paused before replying carefully, “She is from Jakku. She has had no formal training as far as I am aware.”

Kylo blinked. Several times. “She’s just a scavenger? What the hell is she doing here?”

Luke frowned at him in disapproval. “You will not use that word in regards to Rey again. And after her display today there is clearly nothing ‘ _ just’ _ about her. Finish up on your own and I’ll see you tomorrow”

Kylo turned back and attacked the bag with renewed vigor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the Kudos ^_^
> 
> Beast In Black is the title of a song by a band of the same name, check them out!
> 
> Forgot to say in previous notes, the title is for this fic is a line taken from a song by Queen, title is 'Driven By You'. The words always make me think of Reylo.


	4. A Room With A View (What's The First Rule of Fight Club?)

Rey hit the shower after warming down, it was such a luxury, and now she would be able to have one every day if she wanted. She grinned as she let the water pound her shoulders and back, half delighted and half guilty over the use of so much water.

After she had dried and dressed back in her uniform she found Finn on one of the sofas in the waiting area, he was frowning, hunched over a text book.

“Hey”, she said softly, so as not to startle him.

He looked up and smiled, “Ready to go?” He gathered his things and got up, “What did Master Luke need help with anyway? You were longer than I expected.”

Rey glanced at him uncertainty, “I’ll tell you if you promise not to tell anyone else.”

Finn’s eyebrows almost climbed off his forehead. “Err, okay, I promise.” 

“Luke asked me to spar against one of his students who needs to learn how to fight against other weapons, so it was staff against sabre…. The student turned out to be Kylo Ren.”

Finn squawked like a kicked chicken. “He got you to do _ what? _ Blood and bloody ashes, are you okay? Did he hurt you?” Finn looked her over hurriedly. 

Rey shrugged nonchalantly and gave Finn a quick grin. “I won, Finn.”

He goggled at her for a moment then burst out laughing, slapping her on the back as he did. 

Rey let him laugh for a few moments they shushed him, “He may be coming out soon so maybe stop pissing yourself?”

Finn looked at her and frowned, “Pissing myself?” He glanced down at his crotch then back up at her, confusion plain on his face.

“Oh, err it means laughing a lot.” Rey said slightly awkwardly.

Finn laughed again, then sobered up. “Yeah, we probably shouldn’t hang around then”.

“I think it may be best if we keep this between ourselves, he wasn’t very… shall we say,  _ happy,  _ with the outcome.” Rey said as Finn led her briskly away from the gym.

Finn nodded in understanding.”And maybe try and avoid him for a while too,” He added.

Rey gave a small noncommittal shrug to that and he eyed her before going on, “Okay, so I won’t be able to show you to your room as no boys are allowed in the girls dorms and vice versa, but we can mingle in the common space, there's a kitchen for snacks and drinks, a games room with a pool table, and video games, there's a reading room (you aren’t allowed to talk in there), a movie rooms and a room with sofas, chairs and tables to just hang out in. Our dorm is for years 11, 12 and 13. We have two scouts, Mara and Stold who look after us in the dorms and it will probably be Mara who shows you your room, she is really nice, Stold is always grumpy and rarely seems to be around.”

Soon they came up to a large square building, and Rey found she was horribly nervous again. She had felt comfortable with Master Luke and Finn was already the best friend she had ever had, but she would be on her own again, amongst elitist, designer sporting, highly polished girls. She had never been very comfortable around her own gender, boys were generally fairly straight forward, and that was how she was.

She sighed inwardly as they entered the building. It was loud and chaotic after her controlled, violent calm of the last couple of hours, she felt herself hunching slightly under the sudden lights and chatter, Finn suddenly gripped her hand in his, as if he understood she had been about to bolt back outside. No one had ever done that before- grabbed her in a way that was meant to be comforting, she had been grabbed to be restrained, to be dragged somewhere, to be controlled. 

So her body jerked in shock, but Finn didn’t seem to notice, leading her by their clasped hands as he led the way past sofas and tables crowded with boys and girls.

They went mostly unnoticed, both of them being good at being unobtrusive, until one boy looked up from his conversation smirked at them and called loudly, “You got a girlfriend 2187?” Other people looked up, noticed them and laughed derisively.

Finn kept on going, pulling Rey with him and through the door into the kitchen area. He paused there, looked at her apologetically and dropped her hand. “Sorry.” He said, glaring back towards the door.

Rey wasn’t certain if he was apologising for taking her hand or the unwanted attention it had received. She shrugged in reply.

They went through the next door and entered a sort of lobby with a large desk in the middle, filing cabinets behind and a staircase on either side.

A large woman sat at the desk, the chair next to her was empty. Finn gave her a genuine smile, “Mara- this is Rey, it is her first day today and I’ve been showing her round but I figured you’d kill me if I showed her her room.”

Mara ginned at him in return and wagged her finger, “You thought correctly young Finn.” Her voice was warm and what Rey had always imagined a mother would sound like.

“Good evening Rey, my name is Mara and I will be your scout whilst you are here, my counterpart Stold is off on an errand at the moment but I am sure you will meet him soon.” She stood up, she was soft and round and a warmth radiated off her as she enveloped Rey’s hand as she shook it.

Rey found herself smiling easily back at her. “Thank you.” was all she said.

“Your things are already in your room, you were later than I expected,” She paused to give a mock frown at Finn.

He raised his hands in surrender, “Nothing to do with me! Master Luke kept her behind for something… err, Mara, just thought you’d want to know, I think Kylo Ren may be in a very bad mood.”

Mara rolled her eyes, “Of course he is, when is he not!” She laughed, then grimaced, “Thank you for the heads up though.” Then she turned to Rey, “I hope Luke didn’t alarm your or tire you out too much on your first day, dear, now let’s get you upstairs and settled into your room.”

She waddled gracefully ahead and started up the left hand staircase, Rey started to follow when Finn called, “Meet you here later and we can get dinner?”

Rey smiled and nodded then hurried after Mara who was moving surprisingly fast up the stairs. 

They climbed to the top of the building, Rey liked being high up and was pleased when they entered the quiet corridor.

“I’m afraid you are the only one of this floor,” Mara said then paused and looked at her closely, “But I expect you will probably like that.” She finished with a small smile and turned to open a door.

The room was neat and simple, bare of adornment. There was a bed against one wall, a desk and chair against the other, the back wall had a wardrobe. The large window was in the middle of the far wall between the the desk and the bed, and showed the field and gym beyond it.

Looking at the room Rey found her lip wobbling, her  _ own _ space, her _ own _ room. Peace, solitude. 

She swallowed thickly. Mara kindly pretended not to notice, “Your bags are on your bed, there were only two though, is that right?” Rey nodded mutely and she continued, “I thought I’d let you unpack and then you can put things where you want them. Laundry bag is hanging on the back of the door, I will collect three times a week, just put whatever you want tending to inside. The bathroom is the last door in the corridor, you’ll have that to yourself too! Towels are inside, please leave used ones in the laundry basket you’ll find in there. There is a fire alarm button on the wall opposite this room, only use it if you have to, because you are the only one on this floor I’ll know who rang it. There is a fire escape opposite the bathroom. Your lights will turn off automatically at 11 during the week, 12 on friday and saturday. Girls are to be up in their rooms after 10….” She paused for a second before saying carefully, “I read in your notes you are from Jakku- so I put a fur comforter on the end of your bed in case you feel the cold.”

Rey felt tears spill from her eyes but just nodded jerkily, unable to speak, digging her nails into her palms. Mara indicated the clock on the wall, dinner is served soon but you could go a bit later, shall I let Finn you’ll see him downstairs in an hour?”

Rey cleared her throat roughly, “Yes, I- Thank you.” She meant it from the bottom of her heart.

Mara smiled and nodded, then patted Rey gently on her shoulder and quietly left, closing the door silently behind her.

Rey held her breath for a moment, then let it out slowly, still digging her nails into her palms.

Weakness was a luxury she had to do without, she wiped her eyes with her sleeve then went to the bed to look at the bags.

She had only bought one with her, the other was plainly new and was stuffed full of more uniform, sports clothing, trainers, a winter coat, a swimming costume and various other things that she must need for her new life.

She hung the new things up in the wardrobe then turned to the patched and faded bag still on the bed and pulled out her scruffy jeans and hand me down t-shirts, battered boots, her few toiletries, her journal and lastly she carefully pulled out the only toy she had ever had, a badly made doll garbed in orange she had crafted herself when she was young. Even now she slept with it tightly held in the crook of her arm, or when she could sleep that is. She put it carefully under the duvet by her pillows.

She put everything away save for a change of clothes then quickly shucked her uniform and happily pulled on jeans, boots and a black t-shirt, brushed her hair and twisted it back up into her preferred style of three buns.

The relief of being in her own clothes again was immense and her spine straightened. She knew she would be in for teasing and insults over what she was wearing, but this was who she was and she didn’t give a flying fuck for what anyone else would think.

She grinned to herself and left her room to inspect the bathroom. It was had 3 shower cubicles and separate loos. There was a cupboard containing white fluffy towels and a shelf with various toiletries lined up along it, all used to some extent, clearly there for anyone who wanted them. 

She sniffed one, a dark blue bottle with black flowers on, it smelled exotic, making her think of magic, of cold nights in the desert, the smell of spices in the air and the taste of honey in her tea. On impulse she gave herself a tiny squirt of the perfume, then put it back feeling silly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, mostly filler but I felt it was needed. Will be adding more very soon though.
> 
> Thanks for all the Kudos, made me super happy which I needed- i had a shitty day today and then my washing machine caught fire, we managed to put it out before it spread thankfully though.


	5. Food and Thought

 

Kylo had punched the bag till the skin on his knuckles broke and he felt the sting of sweat in the cuts.  He liked how it stung. He left the gym, dripping sweat as he walked to the boys changing rooms and stood under the hot water, letting it pound his skull. He closed his eyes, just enjoying the moment, thinking of nothing. That is, until he thought of the girl.  _ Rey _ .

There was no doubt in his mind she would have told everyone by now that she had beat him. Of course she would, she would be instantly popular.  He sneered, it wouldn’t last and neither would she. He turned off the water, angry again.

He dressed in artfully ripped designer jeans and a black shirt, shrugged into his duster and shoved his feet into his new rocks.

Grabbing his bag he made his way to the dorm, his face almost blank with a faint curl of his lip.  He was almost disappointed to find no rumour of his defeat. For some reason it made him angry; she had  _ beaten _ him and then hadn’t bragged about it. It was like she thought him so easy as to not be worth mentioning. It was infuriating. 

He kicked a chair out of his way as he moved through the main room making some people jerk away from him satisfyingly.

He strode through the kitchen and lobby and up to the top floor to his room. He dumped his bag by his bed and went straight out again, heading for the games room. He had a need to play something violent and settled in front of the playstation to play God of War.

He was hunched in the low armchair in front of the screen when a wisp of a tantalising scent came to him. It was subtle, but it distracted him and he paused the game to sit up and look at the rest of the room.

And he saw  _ her _ . She was with Finn. They hadn’t noticed him and were busy looking at a screen on which someone was playing Shadow of the colossus.

Kylo studied her properly for the first time. She wasn’t as short as he had first thought, maybe 5’7, she was slender to the point of skinniness, her ripped and faded jeans slung low on her hips held up by what must have been a mans leather belt. She was wearing a black t-shirt that had seen better days and was a bit too big for her and immense scuffed black boots. He blinked. He didn’t know what he had expected but it wasn’t...  _ this _ .

Her brown hair was up in an almost punky style he’d not seen before and her skin was tanned golden, he found himself wondering whether she was tanned all over, then shook himself in disgust.

She can’t have been the one wearing the scent that had stopped his game, she was too unpolished, boyish in her aesthetic… and yet, the scent suited her and she was the only girl in the room.

He got up from his game, never even considering he might lose his spot, and made his way stealthily up behind them.

Yes. It was her. Inexplicably his pulse quickened and he frowned, then watched as she gave a shiver, almost as if she had felt his gaze, and start to turn.

Finn turned first and swallowed, then to Kylo’s annoyance he gripped Rey’s hand. “Let’s go get dinner?” and he started to pull her around Kylo’s bulk, Kylo smirked and remained in the way.

Rey gave him the barest glance before allowing herself to be towed out by Finn. That he seemed to affect her so little annoyed Kylo all over again. What the hell was wrong with him?

“So that's the new girl? Heard she sparred with Luke using a quarterstaff and almost won.” Ingalan said as he came up to Kylo, Zainmar, Javiell, and Leonmar behind him.

Kylo curled his lip. “That’s her.” He agreed.

Zainmar grinned, “She’s pretty in a weird sort of way. Apparently for some reason she was in with the boys fencing class today instead of swimming with the girls, none of them can seem to stop talking about her, she’s even been compared to you.” He finished with a laugh until Kylo looked at him. Just looked. He stopped laughing.

“Let’s get dinner.” Was all he said, he quickly saved his game and they went out. He wasn’t following her; he was just hungry. 

They flanked him as they walked, other students scurrying out of their way. He felt his shoulders relax somewhat, content to still be feared, respected. This was how things should be, and no scavenger would change that.

Even if he couldn’t get the scent of her out of his mind.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey allowed herself to be pulled out of the games room. The game they had been watching had been beautiful in a desolate sort of way and she had been fascinated by it, she hoped she’d get to see it again and maybe learn to play it.

Finn was clearly agitated about coming face to face with Kylo Ren, so she tried to distract him as they walked briskly to the refectory. 

“Why do people call you 2187?” She asked curiously.

Finn dropped her hand and thrust it in his pocket; clearly she hadn’t chosen a good subject.  “When I came here I didn’t have a surname, just a number. Someone found out and that’s what they call me now.” He answered gruffly.

Rey touched his shoulder gently. “I didn’t have one either. They gave me White, I’m not sure why, but it’ll do. What did you get?”

Finn smiled slightly at her, “They let me choose. I went with Freeman.”

Rey laughed. “That’s brilliant. I wish I’d gotten to choose.”

“Well at first they gave me one but I refused it- they suggested Black!” He gestured to his dark complexion, “And I was like ‘ _ Why it gotta be black _ ’?”  Rey choked on another laugh as he continued, “Okay, well I didn’t say it like that but they realised how inappropriate that was, felt uncomfortable, and said I could choose.”

Finn was grinning now and they entered the refectory laughing, ignoring the sneers and contemptuous looks they received from other students.

They had to sit inside to eat this meal, it was far too cold to be outside and Rey was shivering in her t-shirt as it was.

Finn noticed and made her wear his hoody, it swamped her and she had to roll the sleeves up to eat which he found hilarious.  She mock glared at him as she ate her food. She had got very excited about the amount of different fruit available and just had a plate of that and a hot mug of mint tea.

“Is that all you’re having?” Finn asked disapprovingly as he tucked into his steaming mountain of meat and potatoes. 

Rey shrugged as she poked some sort of red thing- a berry? with her fork, “Do I peel this?” she asked him and he shrugged, his mouth full.  She couldn’t see how she could so she just put it in her mouth, then sighed in pleasure as the taste exploded on her tongue with a prickling sensation.

Suddenly he hunched down in his chair a bit, looking uncomfortable. Rey turned to find out what he had seen and saw Kylo Ren taking a table ten feet away, accompanied by four other boys. They were all dressed in black. 

Rey turned back around to hide her amusement. “They look ridiculous. Why are they all in black?”

Finn made a shushing noise at her and hunched a bit more. “Keep your voice down! They all dress like him and call themselves the Knights of Ren. And if they so much as think I look at them wrong they will  _ break  _ me.”

Rey looked skeptically at him. “But why? What’s their problem?”

Finn shrugged, “They are rich, they are all in advanced fencing and everyone is in awe of them.”

Rey rolled her eyes, “Well, they still look ridiculous.” She stated.

Finn shook his head. “Yeah, but you don’t sleep in the boys dorm- I do, so I think I’ll just keep off their sensors, if you don’t mind.”

Rey held up her hands in surrender, “Sure.”

“Which means you shouldn’t glare at them.” He insisted.

“But I don’t glare.” She said.

“Ok well, don’t do the expression you’ve done every time we’ve come across Kylo Ren today.” He said helpfully.

Rey rolled her eyes. “Fine. Now quit worrying and eat your dinner.”

When they got back to the dorm Rey excused herself, suddenly exhausted, Finn nodded in understanding and she headed up stairs to her room.

Her bed turned out to be too comfortable, so she dragged the bedding onto the floor and curled into a ball around her homemade toy, then allowed herself to slip sideways into sleep.

She awoke suddenly and grimaced at the clock on the wall. It was 11.25pm. She’d slept for a couple of hours only, though she wasn’t surprised. She was a light sleeper and it would take  time for her to feel safe in a new place enough to sleep for more than a few hours.

Her hands and arms were twitchy, she needed to climb. She got up and threw her clothes back on including Finn’s hoody which she had forgotten to give back to him.

She pulled on her other pair of boots, these were lighter and more supple than they ones she had worn earlier.

Approaching the window she looked out, the moon was bright, not full but still giving a decent amount of light, she opened her window as wide as it would go and sat on the sill, reaching up to the edge of the roof she pulled herself up and over, then quietly scrambled up the incline before standing balanced on the apex.

She could see the hulking mass of the gym in the distance and decided that would be another good place to climb, but on another night.

This was enough for now. She sat down, hugged her knees to her and stared at the stars in a new sky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: If you are wondering about the scent Rey was wearing, it’s my favourite. Armani Code. It is LUSH
> 
> Thank you, THANK YOU for all the kudos and comments ^_^


	6. Get Off The Roof (Get off the roof, get off the roof!)

 

Kylo and the others had lingered late in the refectory, eating and talking. Once Finn and the girl had left he had been able to enter into the conversation more, and he was now feeling the rage inside him dim enough for him to enjoy the others’ company.

As they made their slow way back they paused under a tree for Leonmar to surreptitiously smoke a cigarette.  

They were late for curfew but that had never bothered them before.

Kylo was busy looking at the stars when Zainmar said excitedly, “Someone just climbed out of the girls dorm!”

They all turned to look, ready to tease Zainmar about his rampant imagination, but he was right.

“Shit!” Javiell said, “Is that a fucking girl?”

A slight figure had nimbly pulled herself up and onto the roof from a top floor window.

Kylo had a sneaking suspicion he knew who it was.

She scrambled up to the peak and then stood still, balancing with apparent unconcern for the height or slant.

“What is she _doing?_ ” Zainmar asked.

Kylo grimaced. “I think you’ll find that's the scavenger up there.”

Ingalan gave an amused chuckle, “Stands to reason. I can’t see any of the other girls doing… whatever it is she is doing.”

“She’s bloody sitting down now,” Zainmar said helpfully.

“Zainmar, we have our own eyes and do not need a commentary.” Leonmar said irritably as he drew on his cigarette.

Kylo looked at the tiny figure, sitting easily on the roof of a five story building, if she fell… He closed his eyes briefly, disturbed by how much that idea troubled him.

He gave an irritated sigh, then started walking to the dorm. The others followed, Leonmar quickly finishing his cigarette and crushing it under his boot.

“Are you going to tell Stold?” Zainmar asked as they walked.

“No. I’ll go up and get her.” Kylo said irritably.

Ingalan gave him an incredulous look, “Are you mad?”

Kylo raised his eyebrow and Ingalan smoothed his features and Kylo nodded before saying “I’m going up because I won’t be able to sleep knowing she’s up there. I don’t want to be woken by her screaming when she falls off. I’m not telling Stold. We don’t _do_ that. And it can’t be that hard. I’m surprised we’ve never done it ourselves.”

They slunk into the dorm and past Mara who merely frowned at them as they went up the stairs.

They all had single rooms on the fifth floor, this floor was theirs and no one else came up unless invited or to clean.

They all crowded into Kylo’s room as he changed his new rocks to trainers and put on a long sleeved t-shirt which wouldn’t restrict his shoulders like the shirt did.

Ingalan opened the window and peered out and up. “Kylo, you sure about this?”

Kylo glared at him. “Yes. Now shut up and let me climb.” And he went out the window before he could really think about it or they could say anymore.

It wasn’t actually a hard climb, and he was up and on the roof quickly and with barely any sound. He crawled carefully up the the slope and then stood to walk awkwardly along to where Rey sat, seemingly oblivious to him.

That concerned him- if she hadn’t heard him by now he was worried he would make her jump when he got close to her and she could fall.

That would be ironic.

Him going up to make her come down safely and actually causing her to fall.

He realised his lips were curved up in a grin and quickly wiped it off his face, trying to decide what to do...

He would just have to get close enough that he could grab her if she fell.

With that in mind he slowed his pace and went more quietly. He crouched down when he was a few feet from her and cautiously reached out to touch her arm.

She jumped, almost levitating up in the air as she turned with a snarl and Kylo found himself with a knife held against his throat.

For a moment he wasn’t sure she could see him, she seemed to be somewhere else, then her eyes cleared and she looked surprised at the knife in her hand.

She backed away from him a few feet and somehow made the knife disappear.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” She hissed at him angrily and Kylo felt his own anger rise to meet hers.

“Me?” He asked in an angry whisper, “What the fuck are _you_ doing? Are you trying to get yourself killed?”

She stared at him blankly then she gestured in his direction, “Well you’re up here, why shouldn’t I be?”

Kylo thought his head might explode, “I. Came. Up. Here. To. Get. You. Down.”

He bit out the words with a growl.

She looked confused and he wondered if you could die from an overdose of anger.

“Why?” Was all she said.

“Because, you are on the roof of a five story building, you fucking nutter. If you fall off this you will either die or be crippled. And you’ll interrupt my sleep.”

She frowned. “But why would I fall?” She persisted. “And what has your sleep got to do with me being on the roof?”

Kylo breathed out carefully. It was like trying to reason with a two year old. A two year old who carried a knife- where did she have it hidden... _why_?

He pinched the bridge of his nose, “Let’s just say I saw you up here and was concerned for your safety. Now please, let me help you back to your room.”

She rolled her eyes at him. “I can get back fine on my own- you’d probably make me more likely to fall you bloody giant.”

_Giant?_ He considered what would happen if he just pushed her off the roof himself.

She threw her hands up, “Fine. I will go back to my room. But this doesn’t make you any less of a light blinded idiot… I’m going to have to sit in the dark for hours with nothing to distract me.”

She stood, easily, gracefully and he stood too so she wouldn't be able to look down on him.

He opened his mouth to invite her to his room to hang out with the knights then mercifully stopped himself. There was something seriously wrong with him.

“Don’t you have a torch, candle or a battery powered lamp?” He asked instead.

Suddenly she smiled. It took him completely by surprise and he swallowed.

“Actually yes I do but I had forgotten…” She trailed off, then said awkwardly, “Sorry about the knife- old habits… you won’t tell will you?”

Kylo scoffed. “Obviously not.” He wanted to ask why it was a habit of hers at all, but didn’t. Instead he made a small shooing motion with his hands.

“Go on then, if you are sure you don’t need my help, I want to go inside, it’s cold.”

She paused. “Actually there is something you could do to help me out.” She at least had the decency to blush he thought as he raised an eyebrow at her.

She flapped the arms of the hoodie she was wearing, “This isn’t mine and I think it’s baginess may cause me some problems on my way down. Could you slide it down to me after I’ve gone through my window?”

He shrugged, “Yeah ok. Though why don’t I just take it back with me and I’ll give it to you tomorrow?” Instantly he mentally kicked himself. What if someone saw him give it to her? The _scavenger_?

Luckily she shook her head, “It’s Finn’s and he would lose his shit if he saw. No, I’ll go over, give me a minute or so to get back in my window then just send it down the slope and I’ll grab it.”

Kylo smirked and nodded. Then she pulled off the hoodie and he caught a hint of that tantalising scent again and a glimpse of a flat, taut stomach as the t-shirt pulled up a little with it.

She balled up the hoodie tying the sleeves around it, then tucked in her t-shirt and looked up at him with an easy grin.

“Like I said, give me a minute then send it down.” And with that she dropped and allowed herself to slide down the slope of the roof, she somehow flipped and grabbed the edge as she got to it and swung down, then disappeared.

Kylo’s heart nearly beat its way out of his chest as he waited for the scream, but it never came.

_She made it!_ He thought incredulously. There was an impatient sounding tap on the roof where she had disappeared and he dazedly sent the ball of hoody down the slope and watched it go over the edge, a few seconds passed and he heard the sound of a window closing.

He gave himself a shake then made his way carefully back along the apex, then gingerly crawled down the roof till he got to the edge. How had she down that?

He lowered his legs down, then felt till he had his feet on his window sill, he let his body down till he was crouching then jumped down onto the floor, as nonchalantly as he could and shut the window.

They were all still in his room, he’d been so long they’d started playing cards by the glow of battery powered lamps.

He shrugged at their questions, “Apparently she couldn’t sleep and was bored.” He said by way of explanation, “She’s a bloody lunatic.”

“But what took you so long?” Zainmar asked.

Kylo grimaced, “I had to talk her into going back in. Like I said. Lunatic.”

There was a lot of laughter over that, the idea of _Kylo Ren_ having to convince a crazy scavenger girl to get off a roof and go to bed seemed to amuse them to no end.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I now have a Beta, massive thanks goes to Autonomee who is brilliant.
> 
> Many thanks for all your lovely comments, they are very much appreciated indeed <3


	7. A Cup of Tea

 

Rey dug in the bottom of her bag from Jakku. Using her fingers to find what she was after in her dark room.

She made a satisfied sound as she pulled out her sand goggles. They had a light attached which she would be able to use to read in the dark. Kylo Ren had reminded her of them.

_ Kylo Ren. _ What had been going on with him on the roof? She had been perfectly happy, if rather cold, sitting up there on her own and then he creeps up on her and poked her in the arm!

She would definitely have to try out the gym roof next time. Hopefully less traffic.

She put her goggles on and unballed Finns hoodie, folded it carefully and put it on her desk. Then she got into the man's oversized t-shirt she used as a night dress and dived into her nest on the floor.

She read, leaning against the side of the bed. The science text book was fascinating and she read till the sky started to lighten outside.

She put her book down and took her goggles off, then wrapped herself in Mara’s fur comforter and sat on the windowsill listening with pleasure to the birds singing to welcome the new day.

There were good things and bad things about being here she decided. She missed the unfettered freedom she’d had in Jakku. Yes, she had had to scavanage things to earn a meal and a place to sleep, Unkar Plutt and the others she had lived with had never been anything resembling a family. But she  _ had _ been able do almost whatever she wanted and go pretty much anywhere she wanted too.

Here though, she got food, could wash regularly, had time to study, and she had a friend.

She shivered. One thing she would have to try and do is get some warmer clothes though - it was bloody cold here.

The clock slid round to 6:15 and she decided she couldn’t wait any longer and went and luxuriated in a hot shower. It was bliss and any tiredness that had lingered was swept away with the water.

When she went back to her room to change she found she’d stupidly left the window open and it was freezing after her shower.

She got dressed in double-quick time and towel dried her hair as much as she could, but it was still damp when she tied it up.

She decided to go downstairs to the kitchen area to make some tea to help warm her. 

She crept down quietly so as not to disturb anyone still sleeping. 

It was a good thing she did - there was no one else around, which made her think she was the only one up.

She opened various cupboards until she found a teapot and mixed black and mint tea leaves to make a blend, she had hope hoped they would have Marmaraya leaves too but perhaps it was something you only got in the desert.

As she let it brew she found herself a large mug and added a teaspoon of honey.

“Good morning!” Someone said behind her and she jumped, she must be tired if she hadn’t heard them come into the kitchen.

It was a boy, he gave her a cheerful smile, “You must be Rey. My name’s Poe,” He held out a hand which Rey awkwardly shook. “Eesh girl your hands are cold! You want coffee?”

“Err, no, thanks. I’ve got tea brewing.” Rey replied eyeing him as he bustled about the kitchen setting up a machine with what looked like dirt. The smell intrigued her though.

She decided she couldn’t wait for her tea anymore and gave the pot a vigorous stir before pouring it into her mug and mixing the honey.

She wrapped her fingers around the hut brew gratefully.

“You call that tea? It looks more like motor oil, how did you get it that thick?” Poe asked with interest as he waited for his coffee.

Rey shrugged, “Lots of leaves and little water. And honey.”

Poe sniffed the pot she had brewed in, then looked at her, “May I try some? Smells interesting.”

Rey found herself handing him her mug, he almost gagged and gave it back to her with a rueful grin, “Think I’ll leave that to you and stick with my coffee. Thanks though.”

He had a nice, open face she decided. He had dark short but unruly hair and a tan not too far off her own, and he was only a few inches taller as well. She vaguely remembered Finn mentioning a Poe yesterday.

Poe mirrored her, settling against a kitchen cabinet with his mug. “So. I hear you’re good a martial arts.” He said casually.

Rey shrugged noncommittally. He laughed. “You caused quite the sensation according to the boys you took fencing class with anyway. Though no one seems to know why you were there and not swimming with the girls?”

Rey grimaced. It would come out eventually, so she may as well get it over with, “I can’t swim.” She said, cheeks heating briefly before the cold chased it away again.

Poe went to laugh then checked her expression. “Oh.” He was surprised, of course he was. 

“Well shit... One of my friends could teach you, she needs an extra credit and that would work. She’s really nice, she’s in my year so you wouldn’t have seen her in class. I’ll introduce you.”

“Err thanks.” Rey said, not sure if she meant it. Before he could say any more Mara bustled in.

“Ah, good morning, Poe.” She beamed at him then turned to Rey, “And Rey, an early riser too I see…” She trailed off with a frown and touched the hand that Rey wasn’t holding her tea with “You’re awfully cold, child; why is your hair still wet?”

“Um, I got out as much water as I could but toweling it only does so much- I’m used to it drying in the sun but it is too cold here.” Rey answered miserably feeling more awkward by the second.

“Oh dear, I didn’t show you where the hairdryer was did I?! Come with me and I will show you, bring your tea. I’ll see you later Poe, try not to drink too much coffee!”

The hair dryer turned out to be one of the best inventions ever. At least that was how Rey felt after using one for the first time. She noticed it made her hair straighter too and easier to put up. 

She packed her books and tablet in her bag and went back down stairs to meet Finn. 

He greeted her with a yawn and a sleepy grin. “Hey, how was your first night?”

Rey thought it was probably best not to tell him about her rooftop adventures, so she just shrugged and said, “I got a few hours sleep, then read.”

He grimaced, “You hardly slept and you’re still a morning person? I’d be the walking dead.”

“I don’t sleep well in unfamiliar places. Give me a couple of months and I should be getting some more. It’s a good thing I'm in a room on my own, at least I am not disturbing anyone else.”

“Months?” Finn exclaimed disbelievingly, then cracked his jaw on yet another yawn.

Rey snorted at him, dumped her mug in the kitchen then pulled his shambling form through the common area and out the door towards the refectory, she was  _ hungry _ .   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Massive thanks goes to Autonomee who is betaing for me ^_^
> 
> Many thanks for all your lovely comments, they are very much appreciated indeed <3


	8. Grease and Fur

**** The cool air seemed to help Finn wake up and he picked up his pace. 

“I met Poe this morning. He seems friendly.” Rey said as they walked, to her amusement Finn’s face broke into a smile complete with dimples. 

“Oh cool. Yeah he’s really nice. Did you meet his cat?” He asked.

“He has a cat? Is that allowed? No I didn’t see one.”

Finn laughed, “No it isn’t allowed, but Mara likes Poe too much to get rid of it. It follows him around when he’s in the dorm otherwise you can find it in the dorm reading room. We can look for it this evening if you like?”

Rey nodded easily, “Sure.” There had been feral cats living in Unkar Plutt’s junkyard, one of which she had befriended with scraps of food and gentle words. She wondered if he missed her, if he was okay...

Finn distracted her by showing her the breakfast selection, her eyes fell on a pile of hot rolls and her mouth watered. She grabbed a couple and a mug of mint tea and sat down at an empty table while Finn piled his tray high with seemingly everything available.

She broke the rolls open to cool slightly before popping a piece in her mouth, they were  surprisingly sweet and utterly delicious. 

Finn joined her and started inhaling food at light speed. “How do you eat that quickly without throwing up?” She asked, half amused, half appalled.

He grinned and said around a mouthful, “It’s a gift.” Then pointed at her plate, “Is that all you’re having?”

She was halfway through her second roll. “This is quite enough. I did wonder about having an apple but it wouldn’t go with the tea. I’ll get one at lunch.”

They sat in companionable silence till the bell rung, then they grabbed their bags and headed off to geography.

Geography passed in a blur of maps and names of places she’d never heard of. Grimly affirming her supposition yesterday of needing to do a lot of catch up reading.

After that came maths, something which to her relief she could mostly follow, but she still figured she would have to do extra reading for almost all her classes. 

Well, at least she wouldn’t get bored at night.

When she had enrolled she had been given a choice for a few periods, to the school secretary’s surprise she had chosen Mechanics and Metal work over Textiles and Art.

The woman was clearly baffled by her choice but this was one of the only subjects she was excited about.

Finn hooted with laughter when he realised she would be with him for those classes. “This is the second day in a row where you’ll be in with the boys!”

Rey shot him a flat look, she really wasn’t sure why he found it funny.

They made their way out of the main school building and followed a covered path that led past the building that held drama and music. It was a grand building, one side was glass and the single room it showed was clearly a performance area with a stage.

Past that was a building that looked like a mix of garage and small aircraft hangar.

“So these classes are taught by Mr. Solo- but do not let him hear you call him that, call him Han or he will rip you a new one. Watch out for his wolfhound Chewie, he bites.” Finn said quietly as he opened a small door at the corner of the building and Rey followed him in.

She instantly felt comfortable, the smell of oil and metal, grease and concentrated heat smelled like home.

Finn raised his eyebrows when she grinned but then returned it.

“What the hell is this?” Came an exasperated voice off to one side. A man lumbered up, he had a grumpy, grizzled face covered in day old stubble and grey white hair. He gestured at Rey as if she were a thing rather than a person.

He looked down at her irritably then looked at Finn as if he expected an answer from him, not her.

“Err this is Rey White, she’s new, she’s in this class.” Finn supplied in a nervous voice.

Han continued to stare at Finn for a moment then shook his head. “No. This is not a place for girls, not a place for skirts.” He gestured at Rey’s legs.

“I brought a pair of jeans with me to change into.” Rey said helpfully.

Han looked her over consideringly then took one of her hands and examined it carefully, much to her embarrassment. 

“Well you’ve got sensible hands at least.” He said grudgingly, noting her short nails and calluses. “Why did you choose this class instead of the others?” 

Rey shifted under his gaze, “I grew up in a scrap yard in Jakku.... I built my own speeder from scratch, though I had to leave that behind when I came here.” She couldn’t keep a tinge of bitterness out of her voice over that loss.

Han gave a small nod, “Go get changed, there are bathrooms over there, and Finn can show you the cupboard where the steel toe caps are.” And with that he wandered off.

Rey blinked and looked at Finn whose mouth was hanging open, “You built a motorbike from scratch?!

Rey nodded sadly. “Wish I could have brought it with me,” was all she said then headed off to get changed. After putting her jeans on she tucked her tie inside her shirt and rolled up the sleeves.

Then found some boots to use, though they were a little big and Finn gave her a leather apron as well.

Han wandered around the large chaotic room giving individual assignments, when he got to her he nodded in approval at her change of clothing.

“All right scavenger, let’s see what you can do.” For some reason, the name scavenger didn’t bother her coming from his lips- it wasn’t an insult, just a word.

He led her deeper into the room to a table covered in motorcycle parts and tools, “As luck would have it, I had this ready to go for someone to start on in the next class, so; put your money where your mouth is and let's see how far you get in putting this back together.” He said, then he wandered off again.

Rey stared at his back for a moment, then shrugged to herself and set to work humming happily to herself.

It was a fairly basic engine, nothing fancy and after looking at everything on the table carefully the time flew by. 

It seemed like no time at all when Han’s hand was on her shoulder and he told her the lesson was almost over.

He looked over her work while she wiped as much of the grease and oil off her hands with a rag, before washing them.

“So you do know what you’re doing. You can come back. Rey, was it?” He said, looking a tiny bit less grumpy, she nodded. “Good. Bring jeans, no skirts allowed in here.” Rey nodded again.

“All right off you go and change.”

Rey was just coming out of the loo stuffing her dirty jeans in her bag when she heard a low growl. It was a deliciously dark sound and she turned to find herself being studied by an enormous rough coated dog.

He was gold and fawn in colour, with a darker muzzle and big pale eyes that gleamed in the dim light. She smiled at him, she couldn’t help it, he was utterly beautiful.

He moved towards her deliberately and she put her bag on the floor and went down on her knees, he had to look down a little to stare into her face.

“Hi,” She said to him and his ears went back as he smiled, then with a loud huff he shoved his nose into her hair making a happy little groan as she rubbed his chest.

“Well you are just beautiful.” She whispered to him and he laid a long lick over her ear making her giggle.

He sat on his haunches and leant against her as she continued to rub his chest and she almost fell over, he  _ really _ was huge.

Rey heard heavy shuffling footsteps and looked up the see Han, with Finn standing about 6 feet behind him, looking horrified.

She smiled up at Han, “Is he yours? He is beautiful.”

Han snorted, then gave her a quick small smile, “That’s Chewie. He doesn’t normally like…  people.” 

Rey caught Finn nod his head vigorously to the last part of that sentence. 

Chewie turned to look at Finn and curled his lip in a disgusted growl and Finn backed away, Rey hid a smile.

She got up and rubbed Chewie’s head, “Is he always here?” She asked Han.

“He is usually around somewhere or sleeping on the sofa in my office at the back. He likes you though so don’t be surprised if he comes and finds you when you’re here. I warn you - he is a massive pest.” He said as he ruffled Chewie’s ears.

Chewie just rolled his eyes at him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry chapters 7&8 are mostly filler! I promise we get some action next chapter though, hope you keep with me!
> 
> Autonomee is my wonderful beta ^_^


	9. Welcome To The Punch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you aren’t sure:
> 
> Year 11 and are age 15/16, (Rey and Finn)  
> Year 12 is age 16/17 (Kylo, the Knights, Poe and Jessica etc)  
> Year 13 is age 17/18. (Hux etc)

 

As they made their way to the refectory for lunch Finn would not stop talking about her making friends with Chewie; he was so animated in his disbelief that he wasn’t watching where he was going- and before Rey could jerk him out of the way, he collided with a tall ginger boy.

The boy instantly snarled at Finn. “Watch where you’re going you light blind fucktard.”

The aggression was disproportionate to the bump he’d received, yet Finn didn’t look insulted or indignant, he looked scared.

The boy wasn’t alone either, suddenly Finn and Rey were shouldered against a wall, facing six Year 13 boys including the ginger who seemed to be their leader.

_ Shit. _

Rey stepped slightly in front of Finn and held up her hands in a placating gesture. “Look, guys, sorry- Finn didn’t mean anything by it, it was an accident… You look like you’re ok, so we’ll just get out of your hair.”

The ginger sneered at her and Finn exhaled in an almost soundless groan.

Rey’s hands flexed against her sides, something told her this was not going to end well, not for she and Finn.

“Are you his girlfriend?” He looked her up and down in a disgustingly considering manner.

Rey felt her conciliatory expression vanish from her face like it had never been there. She gazed back at him flatly, starting to feel anger coil deep in her belly.

“Quite frankly it is none of your business. Either way, we are going now, please step aside.”

It was worth one last try at least.

He smiled at her delightedly, “He isn’t going anywhere, we need to teach him a lesson, just so he understands that there are some people he shouldn’t cross. And you… you have a choice, you let me have a kiss and explore down your shirt and you can go.”

His henchmen laughed.

Rey breathed out, shouldered her bag and punched him in the sternum with her knuckles curled into a blade, before she had brought her fist back she punched the one standing next to him in the stomach, kicked the next buy in the balls and dragged Finn past their disarray, running as fast as she could while guiding him by the hand.

He was chanting “No, no, no, no, no.” In a low moan as he ran, the sound of their pursuers close behind them.

Miraculously they made it into the refectory before being caught, there were too many people around for them to do anything though.

The ginger one, did come close enough to look her over again, he was much too close and he ignored Finn. “You really shouldn’t have done that.” He said silkily, he leaned past her face and breathed into her ear, “I will make you pay.  _ I promise. _ ”

And he turned on his heel and walked back to his other friends.

Rey felt anger flush across her face and chest as she stared coldly after him. Then looked at Finn, who looked sick.

“Oh Rey,” He whispered. “You just punched Hux.”

Rey looked at him and shrugged. “What was I supposed to do? Let them hurt you?”

Finn looked at her with resignation, “They would have just punched me a bit, it wouldn’t have been too bad... You’ve started a war.”

Rey swallowed. “Well shit.” she said and he nodded.

Neither of them were hungry, they stood close together off to one side of the food counters, unsure what to do.

“Are you any good with your fists?” She asked him as she looked around the hall for exits.

“I’m okay, but Rey; they are all bigger than us and there are six of them _ and _ there may be a few others of Hux’s guys around.”

Rey nodded absently as she thought, there were four exits: the one they had come in, the glass doors, a fire exit (but that was alarmed and for emergency use only) and the entrance to the kitchen where the servers came and went.

She looked back at Hux, he had divided his group, and they stood at the two obvious exits.

She smiled to herself, what a lack of foresight.

“Finn,” She asked and he looked confused at her amused tone, “Have you ever been in the kitchens?”

His confusion deepened and he shook his head. She smiled and grabbed his hand, “Let’s get some food, shall we?” Quietly she said, “Walk normally, slowly, is your bag on your back securely?”

He nodded. “Okay, so they have the main exits covered, but we are going to go out via the kitchens. Follow me, keep your head down and when I grab your hand, start running okay?”

He looked unsure but nodded again and they went casually up to the counters, as if they were trying to decide what they wanted. At the hot counter they lingered for a moment so she could check where everyone was, and as she looked about the hall her eyes suddenly fell on Kylo Ren, he was leaning back in his seat, and he was watching her, eyes narrowed.

She rolled her eyes at him.

No one’s position had changed in the last few moments so she squeezed Finn’s hand reassuringly and darted behind the hot counter and through the door into the kitchens.

She had always had a nose for escape, her skills honed in Jakku, in the market, in the desert, in Unkar Plutt’s junkyard.

She dogged around servers, shouting cooks, past hot ovens and full sinks leading them unerringly to the exit, then down a dimly lit corridor, out another door and then she stopped blinking in the sunlight.

“Finn, you need to lead us now, we need to go somewhere out of the way and unexpected!” Her adrenalin was pumping, feet itching to fly but she was unsure where to go now.

Finn picked up the slack and pulled her after him, until they came to a treed area, they flopped down on a bench hidden from view by dark thick bushes.

Finn breathed deeply, “I think we are safe for now.” he said leaning his head back.

Rey nodded, “At least they aren’t in our classes. But we need allies. Especially you,” 

Suddenly she felt horribly guilty, this was her fault, she should have talked her way out of the situation with Hux somehow, but she had a very strong fight or flight instinct, and it often got the better or her.

Finn would be a target in his dorm… she thought of how nice Poe had seemed this morning and turned back to Finn.

“I need to go back to the refectory but you should stay here.”

Finn jerked up straight looking horrified. “Why?” he exclaimed.

She looked at him intently, “This is my fault. We need allies. We’re okay for now, but this is temporary.”

Finn looked bewildered, “How is this your fault? I was the one that bumped him… and who could we possibly have as an ally?”

Rey ignored the first question and answered the second. “Poe. He should do.”

Finn looked unconvinced, but she stood, shrugging off her bag. “Can you look after this? It will be easier to run without it, I’m already slowed down by these bloody shoes.”

“Wait, Rey no.” He started but she cut him off.

“I can do this, don’t worry.” She smiled and turned to go but Finn grabbed her hand again.

“No I mean, you won’t find Poe in the refectory, he eats early then goes and hangs out on the far field when it isn’t raining. We can go there together.”

Rey breathed out, quietly relieved and picked up her bag again. “Okay cool, let’s go.”

They exited the trees from the other way, looking around cautiously, then walked quickly up past the gym.

Poe and his friends were visible near the back of the gym, some were sitting on the ground chatting and the others were playing with a flat disc, throwing it in curved arcs at each other.

They noticed Rey and Finn’s approach but didn’t seemed bothered by it which Rey took to be a good sign.

She started to feel nervous, new people were not something she was good at. 

But Poe noticed them and came over with an easy smile which Finn returned happily.

“Hi, Rey, Finn.” He said and Rey suddenly noticed how his eyes crinkled at the corners when he looked at Finn.

Rey almost raised her eyebrow… Is Poe attracted to Finn? Come to think about it, the way Finn talked about Poe almost sounded like he had a crush on him too… Well, well, well.

“Hi, um Poe. Were you able to ask your friend about giving me a few swimming lessons?” She said, trying to sound casual.

Poe grinned,”I did. Hey Jess! Come here a sec,” He called, looking over at one of the girls sitting on the grass.

Jessika was shorter than Rey, with pale skin and black hair and friendly brown eyes. She smiled as she came over to them.

“Jess, this is Rey.” Poe said and then turned to Finn. “Fancy playing frisbee with us?”

Finn looked unsure but Poe just smiled and grabbed his arm, “Come on, it’s super easy.” And looking startled, Finn allowed himself to be drawn away by Poe.

“So I’m actually free this evening after lessons if you want to start then?” Jess said.

Rey turned back to her and swallowed.

Jess laughed at her expression, “Don’t worry, it’s really easy, honestly. And it’ll just be you and I there.”

Rey nodded, unconvinced. “Where should I meet you?”

“I’ll wait for you on the sofas in the gym entrance? You’ll need your swimming things but there are towels there.”

“Ok, I may be a few minutes late as I’ll have to run back to the dorm to get it.”

“Well do you want to get it now? I need to go get mine anyway too.” She smiled up at Rey.

Rey winced a little as she remembered their Hux problem, she looked away towards Finn.

He was laughing as he tried to predict where the disc would fly.

“Jess. I’ll level with you- Finn and I have a… a Hux problem. I don’t really want to leave him on his own at the moment.”

Jess rolled her eyes, “Uh, Hux is such a massive land based tool. Don’t sweat it, Finn’s with Poe anyways.” Her eyes narrowed slightly, “Is that why you’re up here now?”

Rey looked sheepish, “Yeah.” She admitted. “We made it out of the refectory, but I think they are still looking for us… I may have punched Hux.”

Jess gaped at her then roared with laughter, she grabbed Rey’s arm as she bent double, wheezing. Rey was suddenly aware that everyone else was staring.

“Shit, I probably shouldn't have said that to you. It’s bad now but I think he’ll kill me if anyone finds out.” She said uneasily while Jess quieted.

Jess looked at her, “I think I’m going to like you. Come on, Hux won’t touch me, and if you’re with me he won’t touch you either, we can be back here before the bell goes… I’ll make sure Poe hangs out with Finn after classes whilst we’re swimming. Sound like a plan?”

As far as plans went this seemed pretty much perfect.

Rey gave her a grateful smile. “Yeah, thank you.” She felt a little faint with relief;  _ allies acquired. _   
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Autonomee is my wonderful beta ^_^
> 
> Thank you all so much for your comments, and Kudos, really didn't expect anyone to like this. So thank you <3


	10. Immersion

 

 

Kylo hadn’t slept much. They’d played cards till quite late, and he should have been unconscious until his alarm blared, but he had tossed and turned, unable to get comfortable. 

Consequently he was in no mood to join in conversation at breakfast. He’d had two cups of coffee and that had revitalised him somewhat but he was sleepy again at lunch and he sat quietly pushing food about his plate absentmindedly.

Something made him look up to see Rey and Finn run hand in hand into the refectory, they were breathless and clearly running from something. Finn looked grim and Rey, Rey looked focused.

They slowed as they went further into the hall and then Hux and his lackeys stormed through the door after them.

Kylo tensed and leaned forward as Hux walked up to Rey, he got right into her personal space and said something, then leaned in even further and whispered in her ear.

Kylo watched as Rey’s entire body went rigid, her cheeks flushed angrily yet she managed a cold stare at Hux as he sauntered away, what in the hells had he  _ said _ to her?

Rey started looking around like a cornered animal, obviously looking for exits but Hux had them covered.

He was intrigued. What had happened?

Suddenly she looked at him and rolled her eyes. She was so  _ defiant. _

He was impressed with her and Finn’s escape route and openly chuckled at the furious look on Hux’s face as he and the others left through the exits they had been guarding, clearly in pursuit.

“What are you laughing at?” Zainmar asked, craning his neck back to look in the direction Kylo had been staring in.

Kylo smirked, “I think the scavenger has had a run in with Armitage. He thought he had her cornered but she and that Finn kid made a clever getaway and the ginger twat is  _ pissed. _ ”

They all laughed, “Wonder what they did to piss him off to start with.” Zainmar wondered.

Kylo thought briefly about her hidden knife and wondered if she had it on her, he shrugged at the question, “His ladyship is so easily upset it could be anything.”

They laughed again, then he changed the subject,“I didn’t sleep last night, do you guys fancy training after school? I want to try and wear myself out.”

Leonmar rolled his eyes, “Kylo if you train anymore you’ll have to buy new clothes, you’re too hench as it is.”

Zainmar laughed. “I’m up for it.”

Ingalan and Javiell nodded their heads and Kylo grinned at Leonmar who threw up his hands, “Fine.” He muttered.

After lessons ended they made their way to the gym, using the running machines and weights then decided to spar hand to hand in one of the smaller studios. 

One side of the studio was glass and looked out onto the swimming pool. Kylo was taking a breather, looking down through the glass watching as the light reflected on the water made patterns on the ceiling.

A girl came out of the changing room entrance, Jessika Pava, one of Poe’s squad. She looked good in a sporty bikini. She was almost to the showers at the side of the pool end when she turned and called to someone, his eyes went back to the entrance to see a head poke out cautiously.

He recognised the hairstyle and watched in amusement as Rey slunk out, clearly unhappy about something.

She was wearing a modest dark blue swimming costume. His mouth suddenly went dry as he studied her.

Her legs were long, slender but muscled, her waist was tiny even when compared to her narrow hips and her breasts were small but well formed. As she mirrored Jess in showering before entering the pool he got a good look at her behind, it was high and firm but had a definite roundness to him that made his palms itch.

There was a low whistle next to him and he jumped, he’d been so focused on watching her that he hadn’t heard Zainmar come up.

“That’s the scavenger isn’t? Damn but she has got some legs on her.”

Kylo found himself slightly irritated and just snorted, his eyes sliding back to the pool.

Rey hesitated at the edge of the steps down the the shallow end, Jess was already in up to her waist, she gestured and Rey hesitantly took the first step.

“What is she taking so long for?” Ingalan had come up on his other side. “That Jessika girl really is  _ fine _ .”

Kylo pursed his lips, “She’s from the desert, guess there was nowhere for her to learn how to swim, this must be her first lesson.”

He was fascinated by her obvious anxiety. She had been so calm and assured when facing him in their sparring match or casually jumping off the bloody roof and yet she was clearly frightened of the water.

He couldn’t help a smug smile at the thought.

“Are you going to stand there all day or are you going to train?” Javiell said irritably. “You do realise you can see completely naked girls on the internet right?”

“Yes but these ones are  _ here _ ,” Zainmar said.

Kylo shook himself, his skin was buzzing and he needed to do something physical. He turned away from the glass reluctantly.

“I’ll take two of you on.” He challenged and they were diverted away from the glass.

And he put the image of the nearly naked scavenger to the back of his mind.

Quite some time later when next he paused to look at the pool Rey and Jess were gone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey was exhausted and disgusted with herself. The expanse of water had terrified her. It was ridiculous, Jess had kept them in the shallow end, no deeper than Rey’s waist, and yet she had felt so out of control- out of her  _ depth _ .

She snorted to herself as she got changed after a shower, the pool water had smelt funny and she had wanted to wash the smell out of her hair as she was worried it would give her nightmares.

Jess had already left as she had a sports club to go on to. She had been a good teacher, calm and patient and hadn’t laughed at Rey’s fear; Rey found herself liking her very much.

She was dressed and just about to use the hair dryer before leaving for the dorm when she thought she heard a noise. She peered around from where she was sitting but couldn’t see anything so turned the dryer on and blasted her hair.

Just before the hand clapped over her mouth she sensed a presence behind her, but by then it was too late.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Found it difficult to decide on a chapter title for this one, my SO's title suggestion was 'I Spy With My Little Jedi' which made me giggle.  
> Thanks for all your comments, you guys are so lovely <3 and huge thank you to the ever wonderful Autonomee who is betaing for me ^_^


	11. From Fear Through The Eyes Of Madness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so this gets a bit dark, so i’m adding a WARNING here for anyone who may be triggered or upset by themes of sexual assault or attempted sexual assault.

 

Rey was dragged backwards from the stool and pressed against someone's chest, she struggled furiously against the arm around her torso.

“Not so tough now are you, Scavenger?”

It was Hux.

**FUCK.**

Rey redoubled her efforts, thrusting her elbows into him and trying to bite his fingers across her mouth.

But she couldn’t see much as her face was covered in her half dry hair, she tried kicking one heel back trying to get one of his shins and he laughed, turned them and pushed her face first against a wall.

He took his hand away from her teeth and held both her wrists together at an awkward angle. “You think I’d let you get away with your little display earlier?” His voice was strained as he struggled with her but so self assured, so smug.

“Did you think I’d give up after your little escape? Did you think I’d care about the boy you were with? I couldn’t give a shit about him now. But you… I’ll have some fun with you.”

Rey’s skin crawled and she shivered, making him laugh again. 

He’d got her arms held by one hand now and suddenly moved a hand around her waist and attempted to slip in down inside her skirt.

Rey’s mind whited out and she snarled as she lost control over herself, she thrust her head backwards sharply into his, then twisted in his grasp wrenching her arms in their sockets - she didn’t feel the pain, that would come later.

She head butted him again and punched him in his throat, brought her knee up and connected with his balls.

He fell to the floor hunched over, nose bloody, breath wheezing, she kicked him in the base of the spine and ribs for good measure, then stood over him, breathing hard.

“Do not EVER touch me again. Or I will kill you. You would not be my first.”

Her voice was ice, yet inside her fire and fury and fear raged.

She grabbed her bag and left the changing rooms, there were two of his henchmen outside, she punched one in the kidneys with two hard jabs and kicked the other in the balls, then ran out of the lobby and through the doors, she looked back to see if she was being followed, then seemed to hit a wall and rebounded, strong hands catching her before she hit the ground. 

She twisted in their grip, getting a jab into the short ribs and brought her knee up to connect with balls, but he twisted her arm until she knew if she moved it any more it would break, suddenly she could hear again, the white noise having dissolved from her head.

“What the _ fuck _ is wrong with you?” Kylo Ren asked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The others had gone swimming but Kylo had passed and had just left the gym for the dorm when the door banged open behind him and he turned to look, someone small with damp hair collided with his chest, he reflexively grabbed them to stop them from hitting the floor and instead of thanking him, they attacked him like a feral thing, all fists and knees.

He grunted as a fist connected to his torso and just blocked a knee aimed at his groin, he grabbed an arm and twisted up and back.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Kylo growled as he brushed hair away from his captive’s face.

It was the scavenger,  _ of course it was _ . He frowned as he looked closer at her, she had a cut and bloody lip, her eyes were too wide, her breathing ragged. He let go of her arm and she glanced anxiously over her shoulder back towards the gym.

“Are you okay?” He asked, his anger draining away.

She looked back at him, he could see the pulse jumping in her throat, she shouldered her bag.

“I’m fine.” She said stiffly, “Sorry I bumped into you but I have to go.”

And with one last look over her shoulder she jogged quickly away towards the door.

He stood there for a moment, scratching his chin in thought, then he made his way back into the gym.

He had only taken a few steps in when he recognised Hux and two of his lackeys, Hux was wiping blood from his nose and lips, walking slowly as if he’d sustained other injuries, the other two weren’t in as bad condition but both seemed to be treading lightly.

Kylo tilted his head at them and smiled, wondering what they’d tried to do to her to cause such violence.

Hux looked up and snarled at him, “What are you looking at Ren?”

Kylo lifted his shoulders and allowed himself a grin, “Three year 13s who just got beaten up by a year 11 girl.” 

Hux’s face went white and pinched with fury. “ **Shut. Up** .” He grated out at Kylo, then turned for the boys changing rooms, no doubt to clean himself up, the other two followed him.

Kylo left the gym again, chuckling to himself.

He and the other Knights made their way out for dinner later when he saw Rey again, his amused smile slipped off his face as he noticed the bruising that had bloomed since he had seen her by the gym.

She slunk down the stairs pulling Finn’s hoody on and he realised it was to hide the mottled skin on her arms, and neck, then she let her loose hair fall forward over an angry mark on her forehead.

He frowned as they followed her, she seemed to be walking a little awkwardly.

To his surprise she didn’t join Finn at Poe’s table, but furtively grabbed a couple of rolls and an apple and darted out the door back into the night.

He was tempted to follow her, but Hux and his lackeys were all in the hall so she should be okay…

He blinked,  _ why the hell should I care _ ?

He turned his attention to his food.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey was aching and exhausted but needed to avoid anyone seeing her too closely, she wasn’t in the mood to answer questions, so she had grabbed some food and went to eat it on the secluded bench Finn had showed her earlier in the day.

She nibbled her food, she hadn’t eaten since breakfast but she wasn’t really hungry, she had a banging head and her body ached.

She discarded her food into the bush for any the passing wildlife, then got up and slowly did some easy stretching, untensing muscles and loosening joints.

She refused to think about Hux, about where his hand had been going. She shuddered. 

She needed to be somewhere high, somewhere near the stars. They had been her only comfort in Jakku and she needed them now so much it hurt.

It was before curfew so the dorm roof was out, but the gym was closed up so she made her way there and found a drain pipe to climb, though her muscles complained.

It was harder than it should have been, her head kept getting dizzy and she had to pause a few times, but she made it.

She rolled onto the roof with a relieved sigh and lay flat where her body stopped, looking up at the multitude of stars, like sentinels, keeping watch in the night, keeping watch over her.

It was like she was a flat battery and the stars were power flowing back into her. Her mind and body calmed, everything relaxed as she breathed in the cool air.

Occasionally she would hear voices far away, but they slid by her consciousness, unimportant. 

The night air caressed her skin, cooling and soothing, a novelty. 

She suddenly realised it was late, hours had gone by her unnoticed. She was cold and stiff and after hobbling up she had to do stretches again, then she had a wander round. 

The lights in the dorms were mostly out now, well the main ones were at least but she could see dim glimpses of torches and the like, but not many.

The gym roof was pleasantly flat and she went through a few Katas she had learned over the years, moving mostly smoothly now through the forms.

By the time she had finished the moon was past its zenith, she guessed it must be about two in the morning give or take. 

Rey climbed down the drain pipe on the other side of the building and ran quickly across the field and up to the dorm wall that was under her window, she would have to be very quiet now and she rolled up her sleeves before using the gaps in the brickwork to haul herself up and slipped at last through her bedroom window.

She fell into the nest on the floor almost bonelessly and passed out before her head hit the pillow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo had been reading for several hours, his leg had gone to sleep and he stood to stretch it out whilst looking out the window.

He swore. There on the gym roof, going through what looked like martial art exercises was a slight figure, silhouetted by the light from the moon.

It had to be Rey again, she really was insane.

He considered going out again, but decided against it, she had probably had enough excitement for one day.

He at least watched till she had finished her movements and had gotten off the roof safely before turning away from the window shaking his head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey had slept deeply till around five, she awoke groggy with a pounding head and a dry mouth, wobbling as she got up, her legs weak and her back stiff.

She swallowed thickly, she needed tea and as she had been one of the first students down yesterday morning, she felt fairly certain no one would be down stairs now.

Of course she was wrong.

Kylo Ren was leaning moodily against a kitchen counter drinking from a mug. He was wearing nothing but loose silky trousers; black, of course.

Rey did a horrified squeak and pulled the hem of her massive t-shirt further down her legs.

He looked up at her, “You seem to be everywhere at the moment.” His voice was pitched low, which made Rey feel more uncomfortable, it felt,  _ intimate _ somehow.

He noticed her hands on her hemline and gave an amused smile, “You’re fine, all I can see are legs.” He eyed the worn t-shirt distastefully which made her straighten her spine, anger curling at the edges of her mind.

She wanted tea,  _ needed _ tea and she was not going to let Kylo Ren stop her. And she definitely was not going to look at his naked, very toned torso or his wide, muscled shoulders and his arms…  _ No! Shut up brain! _

She sent him a scowl in response then winced as her head throbbed with the expression.

Without a word she went about brewing her tea the way she liked it. He kept silent which was a nice surprise.

While she waited for it to brew, Kylo finally said, “What happened yesterday- with Hux?”

She stopped her face from glaring just in time, “Nothing.” She said irritably. It was none of his fucking business.

He put down his mug and suddenly walked towards her putting out a hand to her lip, she flinched, she couldn't help it and he withdrew his hand frowning down at her without touching her.

She moved further away from him, “Do not get up in my personal space.” She had meant to say it angrily but it sounded too weak and she hated herself for it.

He frowned again, “Okay”, he said carefully. “But has anyone looked at your head injury? They can be dangerous.”

“I am fine. It was self inflicted anyway.” Strictly speaking that was true… ish.

Kylo raised one eyebrow, “Sure you are. Have you had any pain killers? It must hurt.”

“I am fine.” She ground out again and decided her tea had had enough time and she would take it back to her room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

She didn’t see him peer out of the kitchen and watch her as she made her way carefully back up the girls staircase.

He had lied about the t-shirt being long enough, he caught a glimpse of black panties as she went up.

He shook himself once she had vanished and grimaced at himself, then went back to the kitchen and made himself more coffee, it was too early for a cold shower.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter didn't upset anyone.
> 
> If you are all about the Reylo check out an Illustrator called Elithien, her work is stunning <3
> 
> Thank you to my wonderful Beta Autonomee ^_^
> 
> And Thank you for all your comments and Kudos.


	12. I Won’t Let You Fall (Worried About Rey)

Rey was in an absolutely foul mood. Her body ached, her head throbbed and she felt horribly sick and quite dizzy.

When she met Finn by the stairs to go to breakfast she realised she couldn't face a hall full of people .

Finn took her head gently in his hands, brushing her hair away from her head. “Rey, what the hell happened to you?”

This was the first time she had ever seen him angry, it made her smile slightly.

“My head had an argument with a wall… honestly I’m fine but I do have a headache. I’m going to skip breakfast if you don’t mind? Can you go with Poe?”

Finn looked at her askance, “Yeah I can go with Poe, but I think I need to take you to see the nurse, you don’t look so good.” 

Rey waved away his protest, “Don’t be silly. Go and eat or you’ll waste away! I’ll sit in the reading room for a bit then meet you outside the refectory just before classes start, okay?”

Finn looked unconvinced but his stomach chose that moment to gurgle loudly and he left her, though reluctantly. 

The reading room was empty and silent. There were sofas and armchairs and a few tables and chairs. 

The walls were covered in books, floor to ceiling, all genres, all subjects. It was beautiful.

Rey gratefully sunk into a deep armchair in a corner and carefully rested her head back, closing her eyes.

She stayed that way for a while before something small patted her knee.

She blinked down at a little round white and ginger cat which huge eyes. He was up on his hind legs, his front paws resting on her knees.

He chirruped and hopped up on her lap, purring like a freight train. 

Rey smiled and stroked him as he settled down, “You must be Poe’s cat.” He blinked at her in apparent agreement.

“I can’t stay here much longer I’m afraid little one. I have to go to classes soon, though I would rather stay here with you.”

His purring seemed to loosen something deep inside her and she felt her muscles relax with relief.

They stayed that way till she had to leave, she picked him up and deposited him back on the warm spot on the armchair. “Thank you little one” She smiled at him, “I needed that cuddle.”

As she walked to the refectory she felt the skin on her forehead become less tight, it still throbbed but nowhere near as much as before and her stomach felt less like it would empty itself at any moment.

She and Finn were quiet during their lessons, Finn kindly not asking her any more questions. By the time it got to lunch though her head was aching even more and she was feeling like it was going to explode.

She and Finn went into the refectory so they could join up with Poe and his friends and take lunch out to the field.

The idea of food still repulsed her and she was fairly certain even water would make her chuck up but Finn insisted she try a bottle of lemonade saying it would settle her stomach.

The bubbles felt like ants biting her tongue but it did seem to help a little.

They were just making their way back out when she stopped, Finn noticed a few steps ahead and looked back her her frowning,”Rey, are you okay?”

She shook her head, “No. Something's not right Finn… I feel…” The pain in her head seemed to increase ten fold then something inside snapped.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kylo was just entering the refectory when he saw Rey, she looked slightly green.

She abruptly stopped walking, raising a hand to her head, a pained confused look on her face, then her nose gouted blood and her eyes rolled back in her head.

He was moving before he realised it and just managed to catch her before her head hit the floor.

Her face was awfully pale and her nose continued to bleed, he tipped her head up so it couldn’t drain in to her lungs.

Then Finn was there, shouting at her and shaking her hands, but he got no response.

Kylo lifted her up, careful how her head was positioned and turned for the exit, starting to push through the crowd of curious students.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” Finn said angrily, hurrying after him carrying Rey’s bag.

Kylo gave him an irritated look. “The fucking nurse of course.” He said as he walked. 

He maintained an irritated look on his face but he was worried. And he  _ hated _ that he was worried.

He met the Knights coming in as he was about to leave. 

“What the shit-” Zainmar began but Kylo cut him off.

“Ingalan, look after my bag would you? I’ll be back after I’ve taken her to the nurse, no need for you guys to come with me.”

Ingalan took his bag and held the door open for him, he gave them a quick nod and strode off to the reception where the nurses office was.

Finn followed him, walking quickly to keep pace with Kylo’s longer legs. “I can take her, just hand her over and you can go back to your friends.”

Kylo gave him a look. “No.” He said in a clipped, angry tone. “You can open the doors for me though.”

Finn started to protest again and Kylo cut him off, “If you tell me to give her to you again I will break your face. Now, what exactly happened?”

Finn glared at him, clearly too worried for his friend to think about who he was glaring at.

“I’m not sure,” He said miserably, “I didn’t see her last night at dinner but figured she was tired after swimming, then this morning she… had bruises. But she wouldn’t tell me what had happened.” Frustration crept into his voice, “Then we were just getting lunch and she said she didn’t feel right and then collapsed- well you saw that bit…”

Kylo looked at Finn briefly, “She had a run in with Hux last night. Though she gave as good as she got I think.”

Finn snarled, his face darkening with anger.

“Of course we can’t tell the nurse that,” Kylo carried on. “Hux is one of Snoke’s favourites. So;  _ she fell down some stairs _ .”

Finn opened his mouth to protest then shut it again with an angry snap and gave him a jerky nod.

They entered the nurses office to find she was out and Finn dashed off to find her. Kylo gently lay Rey down on the bed in the corner, propping her head and neck up.

She was so pale, her nose had stopped bleeding now but had left a mess all down her lips, chin and neck, with spatters on her white shirt.

He shifted uncomfortably as he suppressed an odd urge to lick the blood off her lips. He wanted to leave her and the feelings she had somehow incited in him, but he knew leaving her alone would be a stupid thing to do so he leant against the far wall until the nurse came trotting after Finn.

The nurse, Joselor, bustled in then frowned when she saw Kylo, “Was this your doing?” She asked him acerbically.

Kylo glared back at her. “No.” He said shortly, then took one last look at Rey and made himself leave and go back to the refectory.

The knights were still there and he joined them, shrugging casually when they asked what was wrong with Rey. “No idea,” He said as if he didn’t care.  _ Which he didn’t. Not at all. _ “She just fainted or something.”

There were some skeptical looks but the conversation moved on and they forgot about it.

He tried to forget about it too, but there was a spot of blood on his shirt cuff.  _ Her blood. _ He pulled his duster coat sleeve down over it so he wouldn’t have to see it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So every time I watch the Force Awakens i get the song ‘Worried about Ray’ by The Hoosiers stuck in my head on a loop. The title of this chapter is a line of lyrics taken from the song.  
> During the 24 hours after writing this chapter i had 3 nose bleeds… so weird.
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	13. Knightmare

Rey woke slowly, struggling up from a darkness that was trying its best to consume her.

“Come on now Rey, you need to open your eyes honey.” An unfamiliar voice said close by. 

Her eyes flickered, then opened, only to close again to shut out the bright lights that glared cruelly overhead.

“Come on Rey, I know the lights are bright but I need to get a good look at you, I promise to turn them off once I’m done, but I need you to open your eyes.” The voice batted at her, kind yet irritating.

Rey raised a hand to shield her eyes, limbs moving sluggishly.

She was in a white clinical room, a small thin woman with greying dark hair and kind eyes was staring down at her, a hand resting on her shoulder.

The woman smiled approvingly as Rey sat up a little, squinting in the light.

“My name is Joselor, I’m the school nurse. This young man says you fell down some stairs last night?”

Although she smiled there was a tinge of disbelief to her tone.  
Rey didn’t even blink, “Yes. I took quite a tumble but I thought I was ok. I fall over quite a lot.”

Joselor pursed her lips but didn’t pursue it, she handed Rey a warm damp cloth, “You had quite a bad nose bleed, is that normal for you? Finn said you fainted when it started.”

Rey grimaced slightly as she started wiping crusty dried blood from her face, “It happened once before a few years ago. I’d hurt my head then too.”

She looked at Finn who was standing behind Joselor, he gave her a lopsided smile.

Joselor turned to him and said firmly but kindly “Alright Finn dear, Rey will be fine. Off you go now, lessons will be soon and you need some lunch.” 

Finn nodded unhappily but went.

“Now Rey, I’m going to look in your eyes, this will be unpleasant but quickly over.” She shone a small torch into each of Rey’s eyes several times and noted something down in a small notebook, then examined Rey’s head gently but firmly.

“And you are sure that this happened after falling down some stairs?” Joselor asked again.  
Rey nodded, then winced at the movement.

Joselor sighed, “Well you sustained a couple of nasty bumps but otherwise I think you will be okay. You will need to stay here till this evening so I can observe you though. I can turn the lights down a little but you must not go to sleep. I’ll just get you some water and pain killers and a cold compress. Take your shoes off and make yourself comfortable.”  
She bustled off and Rey dutifully took her shoes off and settled back on the bed propping herself up with the pillows.

She was glad to be missing classes though she would have rather spent the time somewhere else, on her own.

The cold compress turned out to be remarkably soothing and the painkillers started working after half an hour or so.  
Rey almost cried with relief as the pain in her head subsided.  
Joselor sat in the room with her working at a small desk in the corner and after an hour or so Rey was able to read a textbook without the concentration hurting her eyes or head too much.

After several hours Joselor insisted on bringing Rey an early dinner and when the tray was placed in front of Rey she suddenly remembered how long it had been since she had last eaten.

She made herself eat slowly in case her stomach decided to rebel, it didn’t though and she ate every crumb.

Joselor smiled in approval at her clean plate and gave her more pain killers. 

Finn came to visit her and Joselor told him he could collect Rey after he had had dinner himself, he gave Rey a relieved smile before leaving.

When he returned Joselor gave Rey painkillers for the next couple of days, told Finn she was not to do anything strenuous. Told Finn! Not Rey herself! And let them go. Rey thanked her before leaving and Joselor gave her an oddly sad smile.

Finn insisted on carrying Rey’s bag for her. “You look so much better, Peanut.” He said affectionately.  
“Did you just call me Peanut?” Asked bemusedly. As they slowly walked towards the dorm.  
“Yep.” Finn chuckled. “That’s what I’m going to call you - you’re small, have a hard shell and Hux is allergic to you….” His tone turned serious, “But you should have told me about last night. What happened? All Kylo told me was that you’d had a run in with Hux.”  
“Why on earth were you talking to Kylo Ren?” Rey asked her surprise leading her to ignore Finn’s question.  
“Ah.” He began awkwardly, “He was in the refectory when you lost your lights, he, ah, got to you before I did and then carried you to the nurse’s office.”  
Rey was stunned into silence. What the hell?  
“So?” Finn insisted after a moment, “What happened with Hux?”  
Rey sighed and gave him a somewhat censored version of events; even so he was horrified.  
“Why didn’t you tell me?” He got out after a long row of curses.  
Rey looked at him guilty, “I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to worry…”  
He stopped and carefully folded her into a hug, she went rigid for a second, then relaxed into his arms. It felt…. good.  
They stood for a moment, both enjoying the novelty of such closeness.  
Finn broke away when Rey shivered, “Come on Peanut. Let’s get you back to the dorm, you need to change out of that bloody shirt, you look like you’re an extra in a horror movie.”  
She laughed at that, noticing with pleasure that doing so didn’t hurt her head.  
They made their way quickly through the common area, Rey blushing at the buzz of chatter that erupted when she was noticed.  
“Just how many people saw me face plant?” She asked Finn under her breath.  
“Ah. Yeah, quite a lot actually. And then everyone else heard about it.” Finn answered.  
Rey smoothed her face. Well shit.

After a blissful shower and a change of clothes, Rey felt almost human again. She even added a squirt of the perfume she had tried before.  
When she went back downstairs Finn and Poe were in the lobby area talking to Mara.  
Poe smiled when he saw Rey, “Hey, you look a lot better than you did at lunch! How are you feeling?”  
Rey smiled shyly, “Yeah, much better thanks.”  
“You’ve had quite a day I hear” Mara said coming up to look at Rey closely. “Finn says you bloodied your shirt - I’ll try and clean it for you but you may need a new one. Please come and see me before you go to bed, just so I can make sure you are okay. And if you suddenly feel unwell don’t ignore it, come straight to me.”  
Rey nodded and Mara smiled at her and waddled off.  
“So Peanut, Poe has invited us to hang out and watch a movie, sound good?”  
Rey wasn’t sure about sitting in a dim room with a bunch of strangers, but Poe was right there, so she really couldn’t say no. She nodded and smiled then followed them to the movie room.  
The movie room was modest in size, there were some sofas and armchairs and a large screen in the middle of one wall.  
She, Finn and Poe were the last ones in, her cheeks heated when she realised people had been waiting for her.  
Jess gave her a grin and a wave from a boys lap, he was idly rubbing her shoulder and she was draped so intimately over him that Rey wasn’t certain where to look.  
Finn pulled Rey down into a small space on a sofa, she was sandwiched between him and another boy and she couldn’t help but sit rigidly, uncomfortable with the contact.  
The boy turned to her with a smile, “Rey right? You don’t have to sit like you’ve got a poker up your arse, I won’t bite.” And he winked at her.  
He had a nice smile and she pretended to relax a little but was very aware of their thighs and arms touching each other.  
It was the same on her other side with Finn but at least she knew him. He seemed to notice her discomfort and put an arm around her shoulder pulling her into his body.  
Even then she couldn’t relax but Finn accepted it, understanding shining in his eyes as he gave her a quick reassuring smile.  
The film started; it was some nonsensical rubbish that she didn’t really understand, apparently it was called a Rom-Com whatever that meant.  
Rey let her mind wander off to memories of the night sky in the desert, of sliding gleefully down sand dunes... of fighting Kylo Ren.  
She secretly admitted to herself she would like to spar with him again... or Luke. It had been a novelty to fight merely for the sake of enjoyment, and beating Kylo Ren had been deeply satisfying…  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
In her dream they were fighting again, but everything was different, strange. He was faceless, hidden by a frightening mask, robed all in black, but she knew it was him.  
His sabre was a angry beam of red light, its crossguard crackling red energy. She knew that if it touched her skin it would burn like fire.  
Instead of a staff she had a sabre like his, made of blue light, so bright it was almost painful to look at, it seemed to sing in her hand, like it belonged there and always had.  
They fought under a black sky on a dark muddy field.  
Rain was pouring down, hissing and spitting when it touched their sabres as they clashed in bursts of light and energy.  
She would die here - she knew it with a certainty that chilled her cold body further. But she fought on, determined to take him with her if she could.  
Rey didn’t know why they fought or why he would kill her, or why she wanted to kill him... But the knowledge felt sure in her head, felt as if it were a truth she had learned long ago.  
Then she stumbled, her ankle twisting as it was caught in the mud pitching her forward onto her hands and Kylo Ren was on her, kicking her sabre of light away from her hand and she watched in despair as it arced away into the darkness, lost forever.  
The tip of the red sabre swept to her neck under her chin, she stood up as his arm moved slowly - it was either she stand or his sabre would slice her head in two.  
Even when she was standing, he towered over her like some dark god ascended from hell itself.  
He held her there and she stared at him in confusion, why had he not just taken her head already?  
Suddenly he swept his sabre down and away and grabbed her to him with an arm like a vice gripping the front of the tunic she wore. Looking down at her he ripped off his mask; and crushed his lips to hers.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Rey jerked awake with a yell and tried to shoot up off the sofa but was held too tightly by Finn.  
Some of the others gave her irritated or amused looks then let their attention go back to the film.  
The boy beside found it hilarious and she shot him a glare as her breath heaved in and out.  
“You okay, Peanut?” Finn asked, looking at her face. “Bad dream?”  
Rey looked at him startled. How had she fallen asleep? She never fell asleep with other people in the room… more importantly what the hell had been going on in that dream?!  
She touched her lips with her fingers to find she had reopened the cut Hux had given her.  
She looked at Finn, “Yeah, a bad dream, a weird dream,” she said quietly and felt her cheeks heat and she swallowed.  
Finn looked amused, “So it was bad but you’re blushing so it can’t all have been terrible?”  
Rey elbowed him in the ribs, though gently, and he chuckled.  
“Was it anyone we know?” He whispered back.  
“I am so not discussing it with you! I am going to try very, very hard to forget it.”  
“Fine,” He shrugged, “I’ll just keep saying names till you blush again and then I’ll know”.  
Rey looked at him in horror then hid her face in her hands, Finn laughed, then starting saying names.  
The film finished a few minutes later and Poe instantly wanted to know what was going on.  
“Rey fell asleep and had a bad but sexy dream and I’m trying to guess who it was about.” Finn said and Rey pulled her hands away from her face to gape at him accusingly.  
Poe laughed at her expression and started saying names too, others joined in.  
Rey wriggled determinedly out from under Finn’s arm and off the sofa.  
“I think I’ll go to bed,” She said with as much dignity as she could muster, “Thanks for letting me watch the film you with.” And she walked quickly out, their laughter following her.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Kylo had just left the games room to go to the kitchen for coffee when he saw Rey come out of the movie room in front of him.  
She looked so much better than when he had last seen her, but she seemed too preoccupied to notice him behind her.  
He heard her mutter, “Bloody Finn Freeman,” under her breath as she walked.  
She was wearing that same scent again, it subtly lingered in the air behind her. He frowned in irritation, he’d never normally paid attention to perfume before.  
She was wearing the same ratty jeans and another hand me down t-shirt, her hair was up but a few strands had come loose at the nape of her neck where they curled softly against her skin. He felt his fingers itch to touch the skin of her neck, to see if her skin and tiny curls were as soft as they looked...  
As if she was suddenly aware of him she spun, a hard look in her eyes then she inexplicably blushed guiltily when she saw who it was.  
What did that look mean? He was intrigued despite himself. “You look better.” Was all he offered when she didn’t say anything and she blushed even more.  
“Err, thanks.” She answered in a somewhat strangled voice then turned abruptly and trotted quickly into the lobby and up the girls stairs like she was trying to get away from him.  
That seemed like odd behaviour even for her. He had grown to expect her defiant or unimpressed looks, but embarrassment or shyness? That was new.  
Was it because she found out he had carried her to the nurses office? How amusing. He found himself grinning as he wondered how long it would last.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I am sore wounded but not slain  
I will lay me down and bleed a while  
And then rise up to fight again”  
― John Dryden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentines Day!
> 
> Thanks to everyone who has been following this story ^_^
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	14. Rise and Shine

 

Rey was halfway up the stairs when she remembered that she was meant to check in with Mara before going to bed.

She turned reluctantly back down, going slowly in the hope she wouldn’t bump into Kylo Ren again. What had been the odds of him being in the corridor just when she was, after that weird, disturbing... suddenly  _ heated _ dream?

And where on earth had it  _ come _ from? She promised herself to never think of sparring with him before going to sleep again.

She never had dreams like that, about anyone. Least of all some douchey rich kid knight wannabe with a huge chip on his shoulder... Ugh.

She found Mara in the kitchen, mercifully with no Kylo Ren.

“Are you off to bed Rey dear? How are you feeling?” Mara smiled at her warmly.

Rey returned the smile somewhat shyly, “Yes. Just going to get some water then I’ll go up. I’m feeling fine, just quite tired.”

“Well that’s understandable, you had quite a day. Sleep well, and if you wake in the night feeling unwell press this,” She handed Rey a fob with a button it it. “It will alert me to come up, okay?”

Rey nodded and Mara left with another smile.

She drank some water and took a couple of the painkillers that Joselor had given her, it wasn’t bad but since that stupid dream _ , _ her head had started to hurt again. Bloody Kylo Ren. 

She re-filled her glass to take up with her and turned away from the sink to find Hux leaning casually in the doorway leading to the lobby. 

Rey was disappointed to see she hadn’t broken his nose. Shame. 

She raised her eyebrow, “If you don’t move out of my way, my water may accidently fly out of my hand in your direction.”

Hux walked towards her menacingly, “If you think you’ve won, scavenger scum, you are sorely mistaken.”

Rey rolled her eyes at him, “You really need to grow up.” She went to move around him and he put a hand on her arm, it wasn’t forceful but that wasn’t the point.

He leaned in close to her, “It’s just a matter of time.” Was all he said, then he let go and she left to go to bed.

What had  _ that  _ meant? It didn’t matter, he had probably said it in the hope she would worry over what it could mean. And she would  _ not _ give him the satisfaction.

 

When she got to her room she was surprised to find she was sleepy. Just before she let oblivion take her she had a worrying thought -  _ what if she dreamt of Hux too? _

 

The next morning she was happy to wake up to find she had dreamt of neither Kylo Ren nor Hux.

She had slept till 5.30 which for her was some sort of record and during her shower she realised her head didn’t hurt - in fact none of her did.

After she was dressed she went cheerfully downstairs, made herself some tea then went and settled in the reading room till Finn was up.

She had hoped Poe’s cat would be there, but he wasn’t yet so she settled into the chair she had sat in yesterday and did some reading.

It was only about ten minutes later when Poe came in with his coffee, followed by a chirruping furry shadow that danced around his feet.

“BB8! Stop that or I’ll spill my coffee on you!” He was saying as he came through the door. He looked up and noticed Rey who was trying not to laugh at the ridiculous display at his feet.

“Oh Hi Rey. Did you sleep well? Quit it BB8 you idiot, you’ve already been fed!”

Rey stopped trying and laughed out loud, Poe grinned ruefully.

“Everytime he walks away from his food he forgets it’s there and then pesters me. His head is just full of fluff.” Poe said as he sat down and BB8 hopped up onto the arm of the chair he’d sat in, purring.

“What does his name mean?” Rey asked curiously.

“Oh that. When I first adopted him he insisted on catching and eating bees. I played around with the words Bee and eat or ate till I came up with Bee Bee Ate.” He shrugged, “It’s dumb I know but it stuck and he responds to it.” He laughed. “So who did you dream of last night?” He asked then laughed again at her expression and casually added “I dreamt about Finn.” 

“Oh really?” Rey said suddenly interested. “I wouldn’t be surprised if he dreamt about you too.”

Poe looked delighted, “Do you really think so?”

“I can’t be absolutely certain, but I would be very surprised if he did not.” She said.

Poe suddenly looked a little awkward. “...Because we did wonder, if you and Finn were together? You two seem really close and the way he’s started calling you Peanut… Ismasta was particularly wondering actually.”

Rey choked on her tea. “Me and Finn? Oh no, no. He’s like… well he’s my best friend… Who’s Ismasta?”

Poe looked pleased, then amused. “Oh he won’t be happy to know he made such a small impression on you. You sat next to him during the movie last night.”

“Oh.” Was all Rey could think of to say, unsure what to make of it. She felt her stupid cheeks heat a little.

They lapsed into comfortable silence punctuated only by BB8’s purring.

 

When it came time to meet Finn, Poe came too giving Finn a dazzling smile that made Finn look nervous, which made Rey smirk in amusement.

Just as they were about to leave, Mara caught Rey by the arm, “Rey dear, I’ve just had a note from Master Luke. Your afternoon lesson of fencing has been changed to mixed martial arts and will be in the smaller studio at the gym, you will need to take your P.E. clothes not your whites. Did you sleep okay? You look well rested.”

Rey blinked, wondering what the lesson change meant but answered Mara, “I slept really well, thank you Mara.”

Mara beamed then went off and Rey joined Poe and Finn for breakfast.

As they walked to the refectory Jessika caught up with them and linked an arm through Rey’s.

“So, Rey. I think we need to take you shopping this weekend.” She said as they walked.

Rey stared at her blankly, still processing the fact that Jess was touching her so casually. “Pardon?”

“Jess is right, we totally need to take you shopping.” Poe agreed. “What’s your allowance?”

“My what?” Rey said weakly.

“Your allowance, the money you have to spend on stuff while you’re here, like clothes and snacks and downloads.”

Dimly Rey remembered being informed of such a thing when she had been enrolled but she hadn’t understood what it meant till now.

“I don’t know.” She said slowly. “Why do I need to go shopping?”

Jess snorted in disbelief and looked at Poe who rolled his eyes in mock horror, then patted her hand, “Just trust us, you do.”

Now it was Finn’s turn to smirk. Rey shot him a glare, but he just grinned at her. “So who did you dream of last night?” He asked, as if expecting an answer.

Rey punched him on the arm and he squawked like a bird and then just starting saying names.

Rey walked quickly ahead, Jess trotting beside her, giggling.

 

At breakfast Rey and Finn seemed to be naturally absorbed into Poe’s group of friends. Part of Rey felt that it had been almost too easy, like it would turn out to be some sort of trick. And yet, their friendliness seemed genuine. It made her uncomfortable.

Which, she admitted to herself, was ridiculous; but she couldn't just turn off her natural instinct to mistrust people's intentions.

Hux and his group of lackeys took the next table over from them, Hux seating himself directly in her eye line.

If he had hoped it would intimidate her, he was going to be disappointed. She gave him a small amused smile then ignored him and carried right on enjoying her breakfast.

 

The mornings lessons went quickly, Rey was getting the hang of using the tablet, and she and Finn worked well together, usually if one of them didn’t understand something the other was able to help them.

Their last lesson before lunch was a new one, Personal and Social Development. 

Rey wasn’t sure what that would entail and when she asked Finn he shrugged and said, “Loads of random stuff like morals, religion, careers, community, drugs and just anything else they shoehorn in there.”

Rey frowned. None of the schools she had attended over the years had included any of that sort of thing. How odd.

The classroom they entered had lots of posters on the walls, some of which mentioned things that made Rey blush and look quickly away. Finn had not mentioned some of the subjects that would be covered here, on purpose she was sure.

The teacher behind the desk was short but had a commanding presence and kind face. She looked up as Rey and Finn entered and smiled, making her seem much younger than her greying hair suggested.

“You must be Rey? I’m Mrs. Organa but while you’re in lessons please call me Leia.” Rey nodded and sat down with Finn, in the middle by the windowless wall which was now their habitual spot.

When everyone had settled Leia said, “Today we are going to start on the subject of families; how they work and how their dynamic has changed over the past few generations…”   
Finn and Rey exchanged an uncomfortable look, this was not going to be fun for either of them.

 

They both left that class somewhat miserable and embarrassed. 

“It’s not all like that,” Finn said eventually as they walked slowly to the refectory.  “It’ll just be a few lessons, hopefully then we’ll change onto another topic.”

Rey groaned at the idea of more lessons when she had to explain that no, she didn’t know why her parents had abandoned her and no Unkar Plutt had not been a good father figure… Ugh.

The idea of sitting with chatty happy people for lunch made her want to hit something and she said as much to Finn.

“Oh, okay, well we don’t have to.” Finn answered, clearly disappointed.

Rey almost smiled at that, “No, no I didn’t mean both of us, you should get lunch with Poe. I’m just grumpy, and will be better off on my own.”

Finn frowned, “But what about Hux? I don’t want to leave you on your own again.”

“Oh I’ll be fine,” Rey replied airily. Finn frowned even more at that and Rey sighed. “Honestly, I will be fine. Anyway, you should hang out with Poe… you know he likes you right?”

Finn was instantly diverted by that, “Really? I mean, what do you mean by like? Like a friend like, or more like an I like you sort of like?”

Rey gave him an encouraging grin, “You should work that one out for yourself.”

Finn showed his dimples.”Okay, but I insist you get some food to take away with you, no more skipping meals - you’re too skinny as it is.”

“I am not too skinny to kick your arse you know.” Rey said, but followed him to get some lunch anyway.

 

She went back to the bench that was hidden by bushes and contentedly ate her lunch by herself.  She was used to being on her own, and whilst having friends was nice and Finn was wonderful sometimes she just needed to be on her own. Especially when she felt grumpy. In her experience, grumpiness should be experienced on your own, or with someone you wanted to (and could) punch.

 

Before lunch time was over she made her way back to the dorm to pick up her P.E. kit. She frowned as she looked at the sports bra, vest top and leggings. The trainers were fine but the rest was not the sort of clothing she would have chosen; everything looked like it would be… tight.

And once she had changed into it in the changing room, her fears were confirmed. The leggings were made of a slinky material that covered everything but left nothing to the imagination; at least they didn’t restrict her movement. The material of the top was thankfully not of the same material but was still tight, with a scooped neck and back and no sleeves.

It would show her scars. Rey wasn’t a vain person but she didn’t like people seeing her scars, there was something deeply personal about them, they all had stories, they all meant something and reminded her of an event or a person. 

If no one else could see them, no one else could ask about them.

Rey had always gone for an androgynous look, to begin with it had been because that was what she had been given or could scavenge, later it was because looking like a boy had been safer, less trouble and now it was because that was what she was comfortable with. 

At least whomever had bought her school uniform and P.E. kit had not also taken in upon themself to get her new casual clothes. That would have been disastrous.

She sighed to herself, squared her shoulders and made her way up to the small studio Mara had told her to head for.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: My brothers cat likes to catch bees (she is an idiot) and he has to pull the stingers out of her lips, my friends dog (also an idiot) likes to catch wasps, eats them then pukes them up..... Also, updates may be a bit slower over the next week, so sorry!
> 
> And Autonomee is my Beta ^_^


	15. Stalemate

 

Rey was the first one to arrive and found Luke sitting on the floor, meditating. He seemed to do that a lot.   
He opened his eyes before she was a few steps into the studio and stood up, smiling gently.

  
“Ah Rey, you found it. I changed your class as it would have been fencing with the girls of your year and you are… or rather they are not up to your level of confidence. As you will continue to miss swimming till you’ve caught up with that, you can stay in the boys fencing class and come to this one when the girls are fencing. This is a year 12 class but I think you will able to handle it- I hope you don’t mind that it will just be boys again, no girls signed up for the class this year.”   
Rey blinked at Luke, trying to process everything he had said but he carried on.   
“This class is Mixed Martial Arts, but basically that means hand to hand combat using a number of different disciplines, and mixed sparring with various weapons, though that will not include swords. You can go and start warming up if you’d like, the others should be along soon.”

Rey nodded and went into a corner to start stretching. It felt good to limber up properly after her event filled last few days. 

At least these new clothes gave her a good range of movement - surprisingly the leggings moved better than anything else she’d worn and she found she could get down into the splits without the strain on the seams of her trousers stopping her.

She relaxed into the stretch, working her muscles then relaxing them till she was down on the floor.

She turned at the sound of soft foot falls and looked up at Luke, “Did you used to do gymnastics or ballet?” He asked as he watched her.

Rey shook her head, “No. But being flexible - being able to climb up to or squeeze my way into places was useful for scavenging. I got to places others couldn't.” She shrugged and Luke nodded thoughtfully, then turned when someone made a low whistle...

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo had not slept well. He had had frustrating dreams about following just behind something he desperately wanted,  _ needed _ even. But on waking he couldn’t remember what it had been he’d wanted, or even if he had known when he was in the dream.

So he had drunk as much coffee as he could over breakfast, watching as Hux had sat near Rey’s table, staking her out like a Nexus watching potential prey.

Kylo curled his lip unconsciously while he picked at a roll. Hux was such a _ disease. _ He frowned as he watched Rey smile at something Ismasta said, then as Finn absentmindedly tucked some hair behind her ears.

Were Finn and Rey together? But then the way Finn and Poe looked at each other suggested something else…

He shook himself and stopped looking in her direction. Almost bewildered by his inability to stop thinking of her or watching her.

“What is with you today Kylo? You’re drinking coffee like it’s meth and frowning like you’re going to break something.” Zainmar said, cutting through the fog that Kylo had sunk into.

He glared at Zainmar. “I didn’t sleep much.” He growled.

The sandy haired boy just rolled his blue eyes, and Leonmar smirked. Kylo raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“You’ve seemed off kilter ever since that scavenger chick turned up.” Ingalan said carefully.

Kylo shifted in his seat.  _ Had he? _

Leonmar and Zainmar nodded in agreement though Javiell just looked surprised. 

“Things have been quite… interesting since she arrived.” Kylo conceded.

“Well okay, so do you  _ like _ her?” Pushed Zainmar.

“Of course not.” Kylo answered automatically and caught the others’ disbelieving looks.

There was a pause. “Okay then, how would you feel if I hit on her?” Zainmar persisted.

Kylo felt an unexpected flash of rage rise up at the idea, but then the shock of that reaction pushed it back down, leaving him reeling.

“Be my guest.” He said as blandly as he could. But he wasn’t fooling anyone; not even himself.

 

Consequently he had very much been looking forward to their Mixed Martial Arts lesson, and the opportunity to pummel someone.

As they entered the studio Leonmar let out a low whistle and Kylo bit out a curse and nearly punched the wall.

_ She _ was in their class. WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK. She wasn’t even in their year.

Kylo really did not need this. He turned abruptly and left the studio again, paced up and down a few times, trying to centre himself, then re-entered, in a terrible, fragile calm.

He tried to recall the amusement he had felt at her reaction to him last night, but all his brain seemed to be able to do was stare at her as she stretched… He wasn’t the only one to swallow and suddenly turn away.

He busied himself stretching too, with his back turned away from her and pointedly ignoring the bloody mirrors on the walls. 

Focusing on stretching helped and he managed to achieve a comfortable emotionless state of nothing. At least for now.

“Okay, you all look like you’ve warmed up enough; now, as you may have noticed,” Luke said somewhat drily, “We have a new member of the class…” He paused for a moment and gave them all a hard, no nonsense look, then carried on. “You’ll be working in pairs today, hand to hand, I want you to focus on getting your opponent on the floor as quickly as possible. Without fouls, and remember you are sparring  _ not _ brawling. You all need to work on reading your opponent’s body language. Obviously you can’t all do this at once, we have room for four pairs at a time. Take the advantage of your rest period to watch how your future opponents fight. Learn. Okay? Now get to it.”

Students started breaking off into pairs and Luke went over to talk to Rey briefly, giving her a run down of the rules.

Ismasta sidled up to them and asked Rey if she had a first partner yet. Kylo felt his lip curl and quickly turned away and squared up with Shajac Efulan w ho was  one of Hux’s followers, treating him to a nasty smile... Shajac was on his back in ten seconds.

He worked his way through opponents until at the end of the class he turned to find himself paired with Rey. 

He had pointedly not watched any of her bouts. He had wondered about asking Luke if she should even be participating, considering her trip to the nurse yesterday, but he hadn’t. It may have appeared as if he were concerned for her, and he wasn’t, or even worse as if he was worried about losing to her.

Both of them, it seemed had won all their bouts. He couldn’t believe it. How could she have beaten all the others? This was apparently her first lesson, and she was so slender, by rights she should have broken a hundred times over, and yet, here they were… Perhaps the others must have let her win?

He shook those thoughts out of his head and studied her as dispassionately as he could… He already knew she was fast from their previous sparring session. She was clearly flexible and had some skill or Hux wouldn’t have ended up the way he did. So. He would not underestimate her. Not this time.

They started cautiously, testing each other, both blocking instinctively, her expression was calm and cool, her breathing measured.

He pulled on the well of anger that was always close by and drew it around him like a cloak, something to protect him from the way her presence affected him.

He had the weight and the strength, she had the speed and agility. This was going nowhere. 

A flicker of irritation crossed her features and she changed her cautious attack and block to a full on body assault, she gripped the tops of his arms and pulled them down, took his elbow with her body and twisted till she was behind him, hips close in to his and dug her knee into his, tipping him towards the floor. For a second he was frozen, a burn seemed to bloom where her skin met his, the hairs prickling on his neck. He thrust the sensations away with an angry flick of his head and caught himself on his arms before he was down and twisted his body onto his knees then got her in a choke hold, he had thought that would be it but she somehow twisted her lower body, pushing against his with her hips and sharply dug her elbow into his armpit.

His hold loosened enough for her to turn but he pushed her back onto the floor, hoping to get her into a mount hold before she could move again but she jutted her hips up and caught his chest between her thighs, hooked her ankles behind his back and squeezed the breath out of him.

But he also had her locked down, unable to get away without him being able to pin her. Suddenly he was aware of the other students clapping and Luke calling out a draw.

And he was also suddenly, painfully aware of how..  _ intimate _ their current position was. It made breathing even more difficult. 

He cleared his throat, “I think that’s your cue to let go?” He said and noticed her flush instantly.

She let go of her hold on him abruptly and scooted away, bouncing onto her feet, not looking at him, cheeks still red.

Kylo got up more slowly, wincing a tiny bit. She had strong thigh muscles… then he suddenly had to think about something else fast or he would be going red too.

At least Ismasta looked jealous he thought with amusement, and suddenly found himself smiling slightly and at least he hadn’t lost like everyone else.

Next time, next time he would win.

“Okay everyone, well done. Perhaps next lesson there will even be some improvement.” Luke said, Kylo wasn’t sure if that was meant to be a joke or not, no one else seemed sure either.

“Warm down now, take your time, then hit the showers.”

Ismasta went over and warmed down with Rey, or rather she warmed down and he watched whilst pretending to do the same. Kylo had never liked him.

He carefully warmed down, paying no attention whatsoever to the scavenger.

 

In the shower afterwards he stared at the skin of his arms, there were no marks but he was sure he could outline with precision where her skin had touched his. Again he shook his head angrily, flicking his wet hair back and leaning against the shower tiles with his forehead.

Where had she gotten those scars? Some had been alarming in their size, though that may have been more because she hadn’t had proper aftercare for them. Still.

He turned away from those thoughts. Going over their fight, working out what he had done wrong… But on second thoughts, maybe the shower was not a good place to be thinking about her.

He dried and dressed and joined the other Knights as they headed to the dorm.

Unfortunately they were talking about Rey. They had all lost to her, but at least they were mostly talking about what they’d do next time, rather than what she had been wearing or about her and Kylo’s bout.

“We only let her win,” Zainmar insisted as they walked, “We couldn’t take her down, it would have been… ungentlemanly!”

Kylo snorted at that. “And will you continue being gentlemanly next lesson?” The others snickered while Zainmar tried to think of something to say that wouldn’t be admitting he’d lost for other reasons. 

“I definitely didn’t let her win. I did however, underestimate her due to her size and experience. Maybe next time I’ll get the better of her.” Ingalan said.

Leonmar nodded his agreement to that and Javiell grimaced his.

Kylo didn’t say any more, she had done all that after the injuries she’d received in the last few days? What would she be like when she was completely better and had had time to practice?

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey had enjoyed the Mixed Martial Arts class. She had needed it in so many different ways, to shake off the feelings that their Personal and Social Development class had brought up, the anger over Hux and the confusion over her dream last night. 

So the physicality of the bouts coupled with the excuse to take people down had been more than welcome.

That is, until it came to her bout with Kylo Ren. She had tried to centre herself, to slip into the coolness in which she usually fought, but it had been hard, being so close to him had been  distracting, she’d managed to get into her stride a little but at the end of the bout she had suddenly been horribly aware of their positions... what had made her pull that end move? 

That dream, that  _ bloody dream _ had scrambled her brain to mush.

As she left the changing room she found Finn waiting for her along with Ismasta.

“Good swimming?” She asked as she they walked out of the gym.

Finn shrugged, “It was mainly wet.” He grinned at her then put his arm around her as they walked. “Ismasta said you were in the year 12’s MMA class? And that you were really good! Though I’m not surprised, you are such a badass, Peanut.”

Rey blushed a little, “It was a good class.” She said, then blushed more as her thoughts flickered over Kylo Ren, then danced away.

Finn raised his eyebrows, “Why’re you blushing, Peanut?” Then narrowed his eyes, “Was the bad but good dream guy in the class?”

Rey managed to suppress a flinch, “Of course not. I was blushing about you saying I was a badass… anyway there is no dream guy. You got the wrong idea!”

“I didn’t see Rey pay any extra attention to anyone in the class, apart from me that is, cos we’re friends.” Ismasta supplied helpfully.

Rey smiled at him and he returned it. Finn looked between them with eyebrows raised, but didn’t have an answer to that.

“So Finn, did you have a chat with Poe at lunch?” Rey asked and grinned at his embarrassment.

“Yeah we talked and ate lunch.” He said airily. “Shall we go swimming tomorrow evening? The pool is open to anyone who wants to swim on friday evenings and the weekends. I can help Jess teach you.”

Rey looked horrified, “What, boys and girls swimming together?”

“What’s wrong with that?” Ismasta asked looking confused, Finn mirroring his expression. 

“Well, it would be like taking a bath together wouldn't it?” Rey stammered. “It was bad enough being in the pool with just Jess, there is no way in hell I’m going in with you…”

Finn and Ismasta looked at each other then burst out laughing. They didn’t stop when they entered the dorm, and Poe and Jess were there and joined in laughing when Finn explained brokenly why they were laughing.

Rey began to hope the ground would open up and swallow her whole.

“But why?” Asked Poe as he wiped tears from his eyes, “You’ve got a hot body and you wouldn’t be naked. What are you afraid of?”

Rey opened her mouth but didn’t have an answer. 

“You’re swimming costume is really conservative,” Jess chimed in, “You saw my bikini right? I wear that when swimming at the weekend.”

Rey looked desperately between them, “But I can’t swim anyway. You could all go and I can read or something.”

“No deal.” Finn said. 

Poe added, “We are getting you in the pool.” 

Jess nodded, “Even if I have to drag you.” 

Rey looked at Ismasta for help but he shrugged, grinning. “Looks like you’re going swimming Rey.”

She folded her arms, “You’d have to catch me first. Good luck with that.”

Poe just looked delighted, “Oooh, sounds like a challenge!”

Rey threw up her hands in disgust and stalked up the stairs to dump her bag and get changed into casual clothes. 

If this was what it was like to have friends, perhaps being on your own was better!   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Autonomee is my Beta <3 
> 
> May not get more posted till Sunday- sorry :/
> 
> Also, would people like me to post longer chapters, further apart or carry on with shorter chapters more often?


	16. Ill Met By Moonlight

 

Rey and Finn sat at a table in the common area and did their homework until it was time for dinner, then they headed over to the refectory with Poe and his friends.

After eating they sat about in the common area chatting for a while, but Rey was fidgety. The moon was full and bright and seemed to sing in her veins.

“Are you okay, Peanut?” Finn asked eventually. 

Rey sighed, “I’m fine, but I’m… buzzing. Actually I think I might go for a run, do you want to join me?”

Finn chuckled then raised his eyebrows at her expression, “Oh, you were serious? Sorry Peanut, I’m happy right here. Will you be okay on your own?”

Rey smiled, “Sure, I’ll be fine. See you tomorrow?” He nodded and she went and got changed.

On her way back through the common room Finn whistled at her, she was wearing another pair of the leggings she had worn to MMA class and a long sleeved top. She rolled her eyes at him.

She stepped out into the night air and took a deep breath, the moon was high and very full, the air was cold but once she started running she’d be fine.

She did a few quick warm up stretches then started jogging, allowing her muscles to thoroughly warm up before speeding her pace up. She ran along behind the gym, around the far field and by the two other dorms that housed years seven to ten. Then she ran down to the mechanics building, past the drama and music hall, up between the gym and basketball courts, past the tennis courts around by the garden area and was back by her dorm.

It wasn’t nearly enough to still the fizzing energy in her veins though so she took the route again; enjoying the quiet and shadows, the moonlight and the silence in her head, the illusion of freedom running gave her.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo and the other Knights were sitting out under the trees while Leonmar smoked. The air was cold but none of them would admit it.

He was still battling to keep the scavenger out of his thoughts when someone ran past them, going fast but in an easy looking lope.

He caught the familiar three bun hairstyle and grimaced, the others hadn’t seemed to pay much attention for which he was grateful, until she passed them a second time ten minutes later. 

“Wasn’t that the scavenger?” Ingalan asked watching as she sped away. She at least hadn’t seemed to notice them.

“I think so,” Said Zainmar and he grinned at Kylo, “It was, wasn’t it Kylo?”

Kylo gave him a flat look, “How should I know?” He asked irritably. 

Zainmar laughed at him, “Seriously Kylo if you aren’t going to make a move on her, I might.”

Kylo glared at him and he shut up.

He felt restless, like he could do with a run himself but if he did now they’d all think it was just because he wanted to join her.

He pulled his fingers through his hair in frustration and looked up at the sky, it was clear and the stars stood out like diamonds scattered across black velvet. They were cold and remote and he wished he was able to be the same.

Leonmar was finishing his last cigarette and they were getting ready to go when she went past them again, they paused, watching, then went still as Hux and two of his lackeys went past at a run, it looked suspiciously like they were after her, but from her posture Rey didn’t look like she was aware of them.

If she were anything like him, she would be in the zone, her concentration on her breathing and gait, the path in front of her.

Kylo bit out a curse and took off after them, not waiting to tell the Knights what he was doing.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey was just into her fourth lap when she heard people running behind her, at first she just assumed other people were out for a run too but a survival instinct ingrained in her bones kicked in and she twisted her body to the side just before someone barged into her.

Whoever they were, they were big and heavy and she was knocked off her feet and they went down in a tangle of legs and arms.

At least it seemed like a tangle but she was suddenly and very neatly pinned down. Whoever he was, he straddled her hips and pinned her arms down with his.

“Get the fuck off me you goat kissing shithead!” She snarled at him, wriggling underneath him, she got her legs up to try and knee him in the back but before they reached him they were pulled down by someone else.  _ What the hell was going on? _

“Finally, I’ve got you where I want you, Scavenger scum.” Hux came into her line of sight, smiling broadly and Rey’s stomach did an uneasy flip.

“Fuck off Hux, tell your muscle-brained cretin to get off me, now!” She grated out at him.

Hux tutted at her and knelt down. “You have such a dirty mouth.” He drew a finger over her lips but yanked it away before she could bite him. “Oh, I am going to have some fun with you. Hopefully you’ll learn some manners while we’re about it.” He said silkily, and grinned at her when she shivered, horror raising goosebumps on her neck and arms, he reached out to touch her again but he was interrupted. 

“Get off her.” It was a deep voice, quiet yet angry.

Hux looked away from her and snapped, “Piss off Ren, this has nothing to do with you.” 

Rey frowned to herself, despite her position, what did Kylo Ren have to do with this?

“Get your lackeys off her,  _ Armitage _ . I will not tell you again.”

Hux stood up, rigid with fury. “Fuck off. I mean it, I’m going to teach her a lesson and you are going to walk away. Now.”

Rey heard a sigh from Kylo, a loud huff of irritation. She wriggled some more, her captor’s attention having wandered and she got an arm out and punched him in the balls. Unfortunately for her, he hunched over, crushing her more.

More footsteps sounded and Kylo spoke again, “It’s five against three Armitage and I’m not in the best of moods. I will give you to the count of three, if you aren’t off her by then I will be forced to help you off. One...”

Rey felt the weight lift off her legs and she twisted her hips to try and dislodge the boy straddling her but he barely moved and she grunted in frustration.

“Two.” Kylo said, he sounded nearer, but she still couldn’t see him.

“Why are you bothered?” Hux asked furiously, still standing between Kylo and where she lay trapped on the ground.

“Because you’re a massive dick.” Kylo said smoothly, it almost sounded like he was amused now.

Hux snarled a curse at him.

“Three.”

“Artumat, we’ll leave it for now.” Hux said, through clenched teeth.

Clearly Rey had got a decent punch in as Artumat, who appeared to be the boy still holding her down, staggered up off her slowly, hissing slightly. Rey was out from under him and scrambled up before he stood up fully, so she kicked him in the balls again and watched in satisfaction as he went back down like a sack of potatoes. 

Hux went to punch her and she ducked then punched him in the sternum, hand bladed like the first time she’d done it.

Then someone was behind her and dragging her back against a large chest. “Calm down,” someone muttered in her ear, clearly amused.

“You will pay for that  _ on top of everything else, _ scavenger!” Hux almost shouted at her, stalking off with one of his friends, leaving the downed one to groan alone on the ground.

The boy holding her released her and she went back to kick the one who was down again but then Kylo Ren was there, blocking her path.

“I think he’s suffered enough for one night,” He said drily.

Rey huffed in annoyance but accepted his words. It was Hux she really wanted anyway.

“Are you okay scavenger?” A voice said behind her.

She turned to glare at the speaker, it was one of Kylo Ren’s Knights, the one who had held her back a moment ago.

“I’m fucking fine.” She said testily… then shifted her feet and said somewhat stiffly, “Thanks, though.”

Several of them chuckled at that, and he held out his hand to her, “I’m Zainmar, we sparred in MMA class today.”

Rey looked at his hand for a moment before realising she was meant to shake it. She did so awkwardly.

“Hell girl, your hands are freezing.” He said.

Rey shrugged, “I was fine when I was running.”

“I can walk you to the dorm if you’d like?” He said helpfully.

Rey looked at him in surprised, “Err thanks but I haven’t finished my run.”

Kylo grunted behind her and she turned to look at him. “You ought to go in, you really pissed Hux off.” He said flatly, it sounded more like an order than a suggestion.

Rey lifted her chin defiantly, “I will be fine.” But then she added a grudging, “Thank you.”

Zainmar and two of the others looked at each other incredulously, Kylo gave an exasperated sigh behind her.

Before they could say anything else she said, “Thanks again”, and jogged off, letting her muscles reawaken before putting on a burst of speed.

She needed to run off her all the extra nervous energy Hux had inspired. 

After five minutes or so she heard feet pounding after her again and she turned with a snarl only to skitter to a stop when she saw it was Kylo Ren.

“I am not going back to the bloody dorm yet!” She said to him as he drew close, her voice perhaps louder than was strictly necessary.

He rolled his eyes at her. “Fine. But I’ll join you for the run.”

“Why?” She asked confused, then blushed as she suddenly remembered her dream.

He shrugged nonchalantly, “I have some energy I need to burn off.” Then after a pause he asked curiously, “Why did you just blush?”

Rey felt herself flush further, “ _ Fine. _ You can run with me, but no chatting.” And she jogged away from him. He caught up with her quickly, and miraculously he kept quiet. 

At first he pulled away from her but then he adjusted his stride to match hers, it annoyed her, but his legs were much longer than hers after all, and they ran on in an almost companionable silence. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo jogged beside Rey, trying not to keep looking at her, her skin seemed to almost glow in the moonlight. Her breath measured, her hair messy and coming loose from her three buns.

It felt good to run, he’d wanted to rip Hux apart but had restrained himself.

He almost shuddered when he remembered the position she had been in when he’d caught up to them. If he and the Knights hadn’t been there… What had Hux planned to do? Rey seemed good at fighting her way out of things but from what he had seen she had been well and truly stuck.

Hux was taking this grudge too far, his need for revenge taking him past certain boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed.

Kylo grimaced, moving his thoughts away from what had just happened and narrowed his focus down to running, feeling his aggression bleed out through his legs into the ground.

After four more laps Rey lessened her pace to a jog and he automatically did the same.

She looked at him, cheeks a little flushed but that was probably from their run now... but what had caused it previously? She hadn’t answered him when he’d asked her earlier.

“Would you like to spar hand to hand?” She asked.

Kylo blinked in surprise, “The gym is locked.” He answered.

“So?” She said, “We can spar on the grass.”

He snorted at that, “I don’t want to hurt you.”

She grinned at him, “Worried I’ll win again?”

He folded his arms, “You didn’t win, it was a draw.”

“Well,  _ that  _ time it was a draw anyway.” She smirked, he found the expression cute and infuriating at the same time.

His lips twitched in spite of himself. “Maybe some other time? Running in jeans is bad enough but I really don’t think they’ll be any good for sparring.”

She looked disappointed but nodded. “Yeah, that’s true.”

“You coming back to the dorm then?” He asked as they started walking again.

She tilted her head in thought, and the moon on her skin made it look like she was lit from inside with a pale fire.

His breath caught in his throat a bit, and he finally admitted to himself that he wouldn’t be happy with Zainmar hitting on her.

She gave a little nod to herself, “Yeah I guess I’ll head in, I could do with a shower.”

They walked in silence for a few moments then Kylo said awkwardly, “Be careful with Hux, you seemed to have really hit a nerve with him.”

She looked at him in surprise, then looked amused, “Don’t worry, I can handle myself.”

Kylo raised an eyebrow at her, “It didn’t look like it earlier, it looked very much like you were out of options.”

She grimaced at him. “That shithead had me pinned good, and they took me by surprise, which isn’t normal for me. But I would have worked out something eventually; I just needed a bit of time…”

Kylo huffed at that but said nothing as they entered the dorm common room, and made their way to the kitchen to get water.

Rey drank a whole pint, refilled her glass and turned to him as he sipped his water slowly, leaning against the cabinets. 

She suddenly looked awkward, and he was intrigued by the blush that reddened her cheeks a little, “Thanks for… well you know.” She shifted her feet.

What was the cause of that blush? He suddenly wanted to know very much, but he just shrugged casually and said “Good night.”

She nodded at him, obviously relieved not to have to talk anymore about Hux and echoed, his “Good night,” then turned and went out into the lobby.

He watched her go, unable to not stare at how her backside looked in the leggings she wore.

He sighed as he finished his water, he could do with a shower himself and there would inevitably be questions to answer from the Knights when he got upstairs.

If only he knew the answers...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As if you were on fire within    
The moon lives in the lining of your skin.”   
― Pablo Neruda

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Managed to get you a chapter done anyway <3
> 
> Thank you to Autonomee for being such a lovely Beta 
> 
> Also I am drunk. So if i cock this up; apologies! 
> 
> If you are all about the Reylo, see my One shot: Trouble On The Train or my bookmarks.


	17. A Growing Addiction

Rey luxuriated in a hot shower, letting the water pummell her shoulders and head. It still felt wrong to wantonly use this much water.

She went back to her room pink skinned and surprisingly sleepy. She snuggled into her nest on the floor and opened a book to read but was yawning behind her fist within five minutes, the words blurring slightly before her tired eyes.

So she shut her book, took off her goggle light and settled down, watching the sky through her uncurtained window as she drifted off to sleep.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

In his dream, Kylo and Rey were fighting again, but everything was different,  _ strange _ . His sabre was made of an angry beam of red light, its crossguard crackling red energy.

The Rey in his dream was different, but he knew it was her. Here she had the same face, build and hairstyle, but her clothes were strange, insubstantial considering they were in a forest surrounded by snow, the air bitingly cold.

The fierce, defiant look in her eyes was unmistakably her though. Her sabre was made of blue light, so bright it was almost painful to look at.

_ I’ve never sparred with her blade on blade _ … the errant thought skittered across his mind and was discarded.

She fought furiously, without finesse yet with innate skill. She was beautiful. And yet he was desperate to kill her, and knew that she would kill him if she could.

They fought, and when their sabres met, it was in a clash of light and energy as if they held lightning in their hands.

As they battled, anything they touched with their sabres fell away - riven by the scorching light. Such power, held in the hand. And where they touched skin they sliced and burned the flesh.

The world around them seemed to be disintegrating, falling apart as if they were gods and their power was too great for the earth to contain.

Rey was light on her feet, able to jump or roll away from him, Kylo was aware of an agony in his side, a great wound, dripping blood, sapping his strength. How he got it he knew not, where they were or who he had been was a mystery.

Finally he caught her sabre against his, baring down on her with her back to a yawning chasm of molten flame.

He brought his height and weight to bare down, yet she held on, face snarling, refusing to acknowledge her inevitable defeat.  _ He had her now. _

Or so he thought.

Her face suddenly became calm, full of a serenity he couldn't comprehend. Then she pulled her sabre out from under his, a risky move, yet it paid off as she twisted away from him.

It was as if she had suddenly been given a new purpose, an energy recharge in those few seconds. She was an avenging goddess, bent on his destruction.

And his strength was waning, almost as if she had somehow connected to him and was draining his own strength to use against him.

Her sabre caught his leg and he went down but caught himself on his other knee, and pushed himself back up, barely parrying her next thrust. He missed the next one and turned his body so he would catch it on his shoulder, the burn making him hiss.

He was staggering away from her now, there were too many wounds, his hair was plastered to his head with sweat, skin clammy despite the snow billowing about them.

The next time he brought up his sword, she met it with her own but kicked him in the chest and he fell on his back, she stalked round him like a Loth-cat stalking a wounded Loth-rat.

He rolled onto his unwounded side and staggered back onto his feet, fury alone keeping him up, but fear and pain making him slow.

He brought his sabre up to hers and as they met he grabbed her other wrist and they strained against each other, grunting with the effort, it was a measure of his growing weakness that she was able to push the arm holding his sabre down, so the beam of light hit the snowy ground, hissing angrily at the contact.

In his distracted state she managed to forced her sabre arm free from his grip and brought it down upon his sabre, its light went out at once, and she caught his face on the upswing of her sabre, slicing his cheek and forehead, across his eye. He fell back onto the ground once again, weaponless, at the end of his strength, he struggled to rise and could not.

She stood watching him, chest heaving. Why didn’t she just end this? End him?

Suddenly the ground between them fell away and the tortured earth pulled them apart.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo jerked awake with a strangled groan, breath fast and his heart hammering in his chest so hard he thought it may break free.

He blinked in the darkness of his room, trying to rid himself of the fear the nightmare had left him with.

He brought his trembling hands up to his face and felt along where her sabre had ripped his flesh open, relieved to find it whole.

It had felt so real….  _ What the hell had it meant? _

He glanced at the clock by his bed and found that it was only just gone 3am. Bloody Scavenger. She was invading even his dreams now, even asleep he couldn’t get away from her. She was like a growing addiction he could no longer deny.

He growled in frustration and got up, shivering as his sweaty skin met the cool air. He went to the bathroom down the hall to splash water on his face and couldn’t help trying to see in the mirror if his face looked the same. Despite the dimness he thought he looked the same. 

He huffed out a frustrated sigh and left to go back to his room but paused by Ingalan’s door to knock softly when he saw a faint light filtering underneath it.

Ingalan opened the door, hair mussed but obviously awake and stood aside to let Kylo in.

“You look like shit.” He said as he sat on his bed, pulling his duvet around him after tossing a blanket at Kylo.

Kylo grunted, half offended and half in agreement and ran his fingers through his damp hair.

“Wanna talk about it?” Ingalan asked.

Kylo gave him a hard look, then sighed. “It was just a really weird, really real seeming dream… though maybe it was more a nightmare. I don’t know. But I don’t think I’ll be going back to sleep any time soon.” Ingalan looked at him curiously, but before he could ask what it had been about Kylo asked, “Why are you up?”

Ingalan shrugged, “Just couldn’t sleep… still feel wired after that run in with Hux earlier. I should have joined you for your run… What the hell was Hux  _ doing? _ ”

Kylo frowned, “I don’t know. I think he may have a screw loose... Or at least the Scavenger knocked one loose.”

Ingalan looked at him, “You know, while you were out for your run I overheard Poe and his lot talking about dragging her swimming tomorrow evening… fancy crashing their party?”

Kylo remembered seeing Rey in her swimming costume a few days ago. He wouldn’t mind seeing that close up.

He smirked in the shadows, “If we have nothing better to do… though I thought she couldn’t swim?”

Ingalan shrugged, “Yeah, she can’t, they seem to think that somehow the more of them that go with her the faster she’ll learn… though I think it’s more the novelty of her shyness that is driving their plans more than anything else.”

“Her shyness?” Kylo asked, nonplussed.

Ingalan shrugged again, “Apparently, she’s incredibly shy and totally freaked out when she was told girls and boys are allowed to swim together at the weekends.” He gave a quiet laugh.

The idea amused Kylo no end, and he found himself wondering about her blushes all over again.

“We should definitely crash their party.” He said and Ingalan shot him a wry smile, then yawned.

Kylo immediately yawned too, his jaw cracking as he did so, he stood. “Actually, I think I will go back to bed, I may sleep after all.”

Ingalan stifled another yawn and nodded, “Yeah, me too. See you tomorrow… And Kylo?” Kylo paused in the doorway and looked back, “You should probably tell Zainmar you’re not okay with him hitting on her. Cos he will do it if you don’t.”

Kylo grunted at that and shut the door, padding back to his room on bare feet and trying not to think about anything that would stop him sleeping, or cause him any more dodgy dreams.

He traced his hand over his face where he had been wounded in his dream, and with the reassurance of the smooth unblemished skin, he allowed himself to be carried off into darkness.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry, I know it’s short, but i wrote this at 5am whilst drunk. I blame wine.  
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	18. Ad Hominem

 

Rey awoke to find she had pulled her duvet over her head whilst she slept. She hadn’t closed her curtains beforeshe slept and the early sunlight must have driven her to hide her face.

She stretched like a cat, letting the sunlight sweep away the last dregs of sleep from her mind before getting up and dressed and trotting downstairs for a cup of tea.

She took her steaming mug into the reading room to find Poe and BB8 already there.

“Good morning.” Poe said cheerily and she smiled as she sat down. “Did you sleep well?”

Rey nodded as she sipped her tea enjoying the comforting scent of it. “Good, thank you. And you?”

“Same,” He smiled happily, “Thanks for tipping me off about Finn by the way…” He blushed slightly and Rey’s lips twitched in amusement.

BB8 hopped up on her lap, almost spilling her tea on himself.

“BB8!” Poe exclaimed, “Sorry Rey, he has no manners.” He levelled what was supposed to be an admonishing look at the happy ball of fur now purring on Rey’s lap and he instantly slipped into a smile. “He likes you.”

Rey grinned as she stroked BB8’s head, relaxing into the armchair she sat on with a contented sigh.

To her and Poe’s surprise, Finn came in, still looking half asleep holding a mug of coffee. He plonked himself down next to Poe who was on a sofa. “I don’t know how you two look so awake and cheerful this early.” He grumbled as he nursed his mug in both hands.

Poe laughed and Rey asked with a smile, “Then why are you up? You’re not normally down for at least another forty five minutes.”

Finn’s eyes flickered to Poe so quickly that Rey would have missed it if she hadn’t been looking at him, he shrugged, “I wanted to check I’d done all the reading for English class later”.

Rey snorted in disbelief but he changed the subject, “You ready for swimming later?”

Rey glared at him and he grinned, “No. Not unless…” Rey thought for a moment then smirked, “I will go swimming with you if you pet Chewie.”

“I am so not going any closer to that rabid walking carpet than I have to.” Finn said and Rey gave him a smug look.

“Ah come on, Chewie isn’t that bad,” Poe said to him, but it lacked conviction.

Finn folded his arms and glared at Rey, “Fine. I’ll do it, but we don’t have a Workshop lesson till next week, so I’ll do it then.”

Rey gave a disbelieving chuckle, “Sure okay, so we’ll go swimming next week then.” 

Finn gave an exasperated sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Fine. We’ll go at lunch. I will pet the furry abomination and then you will take me to the nurse to get my hand sewn back on.”

Rey scoffed, “Why don’t you like him? He’s adorable!”

Poe raised his eyebrows at that and looked at Finn who gave a shrug as if to say  _ Yes, she is mad, _ and Poe turned back to her, “Chewie bites or tries to bite everyone except Han. I’m still not sure why he is still allowed to be on school property.”

“Well he didn’t bite me.” Rey said stubbornly. “And anyway, you don’t have to pet him, you guys go for your swim and I’ll entertain myself.”

“Oh no, you can’t back out of the deal now.” Finn said firmly, “I’m doing this and then you are coming swimming, and there is nothing you can do to get out of it.”

Rey scowled at him, Well shit. She got caught in her own trap, though he had yet to hold up his side so she may yet escape.

 

They left for the refectory when the rest of Poe’s group were up, as they went through the common area one of the Knights, Zainmar? Gave her a small wave, “You sleep well Scavenger?” Rey blushed as Finn turned to stare at her quizzically, “Err, good thanks, you?”

Zainmar gave her a sunny smile which was at odds with all his black clothing, “Can’t complain.”

Ismasta appeared at Rey’s side, shooting Zainmar a glare, but the black clad boy gave him an unimpressed look, shot Rey another smile then turned back to his coffee.

“Well that was weird,” Finn said to Rey and Ismasta nodded frowning.

Rey shrugged uncomfortably, “Saw him last night on my run.”

“Wait, hold up,” Finn said and stopped mid-stride, turning to look at Rey closely, “You blushed when he spoke to you… Was he the one you dreamt about?”

Rey rolled her eyes, “No he bloody well isn’t. You are a massive land based tool, Finn Freeman.” She started walking again.

Ismasta who had been looking suspicious choked out a laugh at that and Finn chuckled.

 

During breakfast Finn brought up the subject of their first lesson. “So first period we have Headmaster Snoke for Critical Thinking… I’m saying this now so you aren’t caught by surprise, but he is terrifying.”

Rey frowned wondering what a Critical Thinking class was about and Finn went on. “He had an accident or something years ago and he is creepy looking, which doesn’t help but he is mainly just… terrifying. You’ll understand when you see him… also he is completely evil and will make you feel like shit. Try and keep your head down and don’t stare.”

“Okaaaaay. Thanks for the pep talk,” She said with a hint of sarcasm, “What happens in a Critical Thinking Class?”

Finn shrugged slightly, “Basically you learn how to assess the reasons we are given to do or believe in things or how we live.”

Rey frowned, “Why do you need to learn how to do that, shouldn’t you already be able to?”

Poe leaned past Finn, “It is more about how to assess things without allowing emotion or unfounded belief to colour your thinking and decisions… I’m not very good at it, I don’t know why they try teaching it to us, we’re teenagers! All we think with are emotions and hormones!”

Poe laughed and Finn dimpled at him, Rey smirked as she watched them.

 

Finn hadn’t been joking when he said Snoke was terrifying. He was tall and imposing despite his deformed, scarred face. There was an unbridled air of power about him, his voice when he spoke seemed soft yet the command in it was absolute. 

The class was utterly silent, sitting unnaturally still under his hawk like gaze as he paced slowly about the class whilst he spoke.

“ _ Ad Hominem, _ ” His voice sounded like the crumbling of dry leather, “ Refers to a fallacious argumentative strategy whereby an argument is rebutted by attacking the character, motive, or other attribute of the person making the argument, or persons associated with the argument rather than attacking the substance of the argument itself and is often calculated to appeal to the person addressed more than to impartial reason. An example would be a lawyer who argues that his client should not be held responsible for theft because he is poor…”

He went on, Rey struggling to follow what he said as he drifted about the room, she found the hairs on her neck standing up whenever he was out of her line of sight.

He was suddenly in front of her, towering over her like a giant serpent poised to strike, “Miss White - you recently saw the school nurse I believe, after sustaining an injury after falling down some stairs,” Rey flushed, unable to look away from him as he studied her, “Now, if I were to suggest  that you were clumsy because you were an uncultured urchin from a desert backwater. Would you say that was a good example of an ad hominem argument?”

Rey’s skin prickled with anger and she clenched her fists under the table, Finn squeezed the fist nearest to him, his solidarity comforting. 

Rey cleared her throat slight, “I would say yes, that it was.”

Snoke raised an eyebrow slightly, “And why would you say that?”

“Because you were making an assumption based on my background, me as a person rather than what I did…” She trailed off weakly.

His face didn’t change, “Perhaps. It was not the best of examples of an ad hominem. What it  _ actually _ was was an excellent example of why we don’t go for personal targets. I attacked something close to you, making you respond with emotion rather than logic.” Snoke moved away from Rey as he spoke and she quietly let out a sigh of relief. 

“If this is the level you need to sink to to make your point, then your point is most likely flawed to begin with. If an argument cannot be made on logical grounds alone, then it is not worth making.” Snoke said.

Rey frowned through the rest of the class and felt tense for the rest of the morning, Finn was also pretty subdued, and when they went to the refectory for lunch Rey found she wasn’t hungry. 

She had some bread and fruit after Finn threatened to force feed her, but she couldn’t seem to shift the feeling of gloom she was feeling.

Poe reminded them that they needed to stop by the mechanics workshop, and Rey managed to raise a smirk at Finn’s groan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kylo had slept late, and didn’t feel as terrible as he had expected to feel upon waking. The memories of his dream were still clear in his mind, the phantom slice line to his face tingling slightly. But instead of it making him wary or disturbed by Rey, it had the opposite effect. 

As he got up and dressed, he found himself very much looking forward to seeing her again, wondering if she would somehow be aware of what he had dreamt.

_ It was stupid _ , and yet he couldn’t deny what he was feeling. 

He didn’t see her till lunch as he had missed breakfast. She seemed oddly subdued, picking at her food uninterestedly, the others around her chatting over her.

He frowned at her tense posture, wondering how it would feel to casually be able to massage her shoulders till she was relaxed.

He could remember the sensation caused when his skin had touched hers in their MMA class.

“So I hear we’re going swimming after lessons,” Zainmar said, bringing Kylo’s attention back to the Knights table.

His lips twitched in an almost smile. “It should be entertaining.” Was all he said.

Zainmar grinned anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Poe came with Finn and Rey to visit Chewie, the others had wanted to come but Finn had insisted it may make Chewie more volatile, Poe had insisted on joining them however.

Chewie was waiting for them, he was lying in a small patch of weak sun outside on the grass by the workshop, his ears went back in a smile when he saw Rey and she couldn’t help but return it.

She went straight to him, kneeling on the ground beside him and scratching his head as Poe and Finn stood a few feet away, despite Chewies wagging tail.

Chewie stood up and lent his chin on Rey’s shoulder, and the tension she’d been carrying around since Snoke’s class evaporated as he huffed a pleased sigh in her ear.

Rey turned her head to grin at Finn, “Walk over slowly,” She told him.

He looked at her dubiously for a moment before doing as she said. Chewie lifted his head up at the movement and treated Finn to a dark, chocolatey growl.

Finn hesitated, “I’m not so sure about this Rey.”

“He hasn’t shown you teeth” Rey answered then turned to Chewie, “Hey big guy, mind if my friend Finn comes and says hello?” 

Chewie looked at her, pale eyes intelligent, and he gave a small unimpressed sigh. Rey held out her hand to Finn, he gripped it and she brought their linked fingers to Chewie’s nose for him to sniff.

He huffed and rolled an eye at Rey and then Finn, “Finn touch his head, gently.” And she let go of his hand.

He touched Chewies head warily, Chewie grumbled at him but relaxed his stance and Rey rubbed his chin.

Finn grew bolder and stroked Chewie’s ears raising his eyebrows in surprise at how silky they were.

Rey beamed at him, “See? He is lovely.” Finn grinned at her, “Yeah, he’s kinda nice…” Chewie rolled an eye at him, “He’s great!” He amended hastily. And Rey chuckled.

Finn’s smile turned smug, “So now you have to come swimming later Peanut, no getting out of it now.”

“Well shit.” Rey had forgotten. She sighed. “Okay, fine. I’ll go swimming.” 

Finn opened his mouth to whoop but shut it again after a hard look from Chewie.

Poe gave a quiet chuckled, still standing a few paces away, “Sorry to break up this love in, but it’s not too long till classes start.”

Rey sighed and stood, “See you soon Chewie,” She said as she ruffled his ears in goodbye. He pressed his nose briefly into her hand with a “Whuff” then settled himself back on the grass with a groan of contentment. 

“Jess said she’d wait for you in the gym waiting area before changing,” Poe said to Rey as they walked to the dorm to collect their swimming things.

Rey sighed resignedly but nodded. She could hide, but Finn had faced his fear, overcome his discomfort, if she couldn’t follow suit it would lessen her in his eyes as well as her own. This was happening and that was that. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry i missed posting yesterday T_T will try and get another written in next 24 hours to make up for it!
> 
> Thanks to Autonomee for Betaing!


	19. Bulldog!

As Finn and Rey walked to the gym after their last class Rey finally worked up the courage to say, “This is going to sound really stupid, but could you stall the boys changing for a few minutes so Jess and I can get in the pool before you?”

Rey stared straight ahead, unable to watch his reaction to her question, a slight flush on her cheeks.

She was aware of his head turning to look at her but that was it.

There was a pause, then he said easily, “Sure Peanut, I can do that.”

Rey huffed a little sigh of relief and Finn put his arm around her, even though she had known him less than a week it felt like the most natural thing in the world and she leant her head on his shoulder slightly as they walked.

“You know I’d never pry, but if you ever want to talk about your life in Jakku, or anything else, I’m here. I always will be.” He said it softly, with so much care Rey’s eyes prickled suddenly.

“Don’t say always Finn, people leave, people break promises, people lie... But thank you.” She answered, then immediately felt guilty.

She looked at his face, expecting to see hurt there, but there was an awful understanding instead. He knew, he was like her and she wasn’t alone now.

Rey stopped and hugged him. “Your friendship has been the most important of my life, Finn.”

He returned her hug tightly, “And you will always have it.” She could hear the smile in his voice and couldn’t help mirroring it.

They broke apart and walked on, Rey feeling lighter somehow.

Jess jumped up from the sofa where she had been sitting with Muhager, who Rey thought  _ might  _ be her boyfriend, though she seemed like she may have a few.

Jess grinned at Rey, “Hey girl, you ready for this?”

Rey sighed, making Jess laugh, “As I’ll ever be, let’s get this over with.”

Jess chuckled as she followed Rey into the changing rooms. “It’ll be fine, everyone knows you can kick their arse if you feel like it, so don’t worry about being teased.”

Rey went to a cubicle to change, “It’s not so much the teasing that bothers me, though maybe a bit, it’s the idea of being nearly naked around so many people, especially since it’s mostly boys… and well, you saw my scars after our lesson the other day…”

Jess snorted, “Seriously, it may be the first time you’ve been nearly naked around people, but they are used to seeing girls swimming in a lot less than your costume. Even my sports bikini is modest compared to what some girls wear. You may get some stares, some of them are bound to check you out, but no one is going to touch you or anything and if you’re really worried about your scars, just threaten to punch anyone who asks.”

Rey could hear amusement in Jess’s voice and harrumphed to herself.

She got changed quickly, mindful that Finn wouldn’t be able to hold the boys up for long and was relieved to see Jess was finished too.

As they walked out into the pool area, Rey could feel her muscles tense and her shoulders hunch a little.

She quickly rinsed herself in the poolside shower then went down the shallow end steps, her fear of being caught out of the water making her fear it a lot less than she had previously.

“So what do people do when they are not swimming in a lesson?” She asked Jess, to distract herself from the alien feeling of being in so much water.

Jess shrugged as she stepped down and joined her, “Hang out, play games, race, just swim about. Depends on what people fancy.”

There were suddenly male voices and Rey felt her heartbeat pick up, her feet itched to run. These cowardly feelings were intolerable. 

She sunk lower in the water - up to her shoulders, but that just gave her heart another reason to try and beat its way out of her chest.

“Peanut, are you having a panic attack?”

Rey jerked her head up to find Finn standing in front of her, when had he got in the water?

“No. No, I’m fine.” She said, but didn’t sound convincing, even to herself.

Finn frowned, “Do you want a hug or would that be too much right now?”

Rey swallowed, “Too much.” 

Finn’s eyes softened as they regarded her, then suddenly brightened, “How about you hold on to my shoulders and we take a swim? Then you’ll be away from everyone for a bit, I won’t be touching you and you don’t have to worry about drowning.”

Rey was about to decline when she noticed Ismasta start walking into the pool, “Actually, yeah, let’s do that.”

Finn smiled and Rey stood up and followed him into the deeper water, “Okay Peanut, put a hand on each of my shoulders, and if you need to, kick your legs a bit.”

Finn turned his back to her and sank down, Rey took a deep breath and grabbed his shoulders.

“Cool, let’s go.”

And Finn started swimming, at first Rey was terrified, then even more terrified when she realised she was now out of her depth; but then, she actually started to enjoy it. Finn was a strong swimmer and she found watching the way he moved made her want to learn properly herself.

She was grinning when they made their way back to the others who were still in the shallow end, chatting or splashing each other.

Poe returned her grin when he saw them back, “So who wants to play a game?” He called, and people started suggesting things.

Rey had absolutely no idea what any of them were.

“What about Bulldog?” Jess suggested, giving Rey an encouraging look.

Everyone else seemed to like the idea so Poe nodded, “Bulldog it is, Ashtjac you were last in the pool so you’re on guard.”

Ashtjac made a disgruntled noise as everyone else moved to the shower side of the pool. Poe moved over to Finn and Rey, “I’m guessing from your faces neither of you have played bulldog before?” Rey and Finn nodded. “Okay, so everyone starts at one side of the pool and when the Bulldog, in this case Ashtjac, calls Bulldog, you have to get to the other side without him touching you. If he gets you then you join him as a Bulldog and so on until there is only one person left and they are the winner, all clear?”

Finn nodded and Rey said, “It sounds a little like Pirates. But I don’t think that would work as well in water.”

Poe looked interested, “You’ll have to teach us sometime!” Then he turned his back against the side of the pool and Finn and Rey followed suit.

Rey could feel a tingle of excitement shiver through her, she hadn’t played a game in years.

Finn looked down at her and grinned, “Try not to punch him if he catches you, okay?”

Rey snorted at him, “Of course not!” And he just laughed at her.

“Bulldog!” Ashtjac called. And suddenly everyone was moving, most swum but Rey had stuck to the area she could touch her feet to the bottom in and did an odd splashy sort of run.

If Ashtjac had thought things through she would have been who he had gone for first, though she wouldn’t have made a great Bulldog herself, but he didn’t and Rey was only caught half way through by Ismasta.

She was just a few feet away from the safe side when he caught her by the waist, pulling her back with an enormous splash. “Got you!” He said triumphantly and Rey had to push away a bubble of panic.

He let go quickly, gave her a cocky grin and went back to the middle of the pool. Rey let out a breath then followed, focusing on Finn who was still in the shallow end too.

“Uh oh.” He said when he saw her look at him and she grinned.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo and the other Knights entered the pool area to the sounds of laughter and splashing. Poe and his lot were playing Bulldog, and Kylo watched with interest as Rey pounced on Finn as he tried to get past her; she seemed to be past her shyness and part of him was oddly disappointed at that.

The noise diminished slightly when the others noticed the Knights arrival, Rey and Finn were the last to notice, they seemed to be having some sort of play fight, but Rey picked up the change in noise and turned to follow the others stares, and to his satisfaction she immediately blushed and sunk down till the water was up to her neck.

“Hey Poe, mind if we join in?” Zainmar called as they went over to use the showers.

Poe looked surprised and gave a little shrug, “Sure, we’re down to the last two anyway.” He took in the others in the water, “Call it a win for Jess and Brobard?”

Everyone agreed, though all of them seemed to be surprised by this turn of events.

The Knights slipped into the water, ignoring the steps. “Who was last out of the changing rooms?” Poe asked.

The Knights all looked at Leonmar who grimaced. “Me.” He said resignedly.

“Cool, you’re it then.” Said Poe and he moved to the side of the pool, the others following. Kylo very much wanted to be in the shallow end with Rey but if he swam down now it would be obvious. He rolled his shoulders, patience was not a virtue he was accustomed to practicing.   

Leonmar called, “Bulldog!” And as one Kylo and the Knights dived down and swam along the bottom.

Kylo was amused no one else did, surely it was too easy otherwise? He worked his way down the pool over the next few rounds, Leonmar went for the easier targets anyway, then Jessika Pava caught Ingalan, (though Kylo had a sneaky suspicion Ingalan let her), and Leonmar and Ingalan went after the other Knights together. Kylo actually had to start  _ trying _ not to be caught.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey almost died when she saw Kylo Ren had entered the pool area, she turned in the opposite direction as he showered so she wouldn’t see.

Finn looked at her, back at the Knights and then back at her, “Noooooo! Surely you didn’t dream about one of them?” He said, she was thankful he said it fairly quietly.

“Of course not.” She answered in a slightly strained voice. “But I’d just got used to everyone in the pool and now there are  _ new people! _ And I didn’t watch you come in either, if you remember.”

Finn gave her an  _ I don’t believe you look, _ but didn’t answer, grimacing as Poe agreed to the Knights joining their game.

Rey echoed his expression. 

She relaxed after the first few rounds though, enjoying herself again, even when she was caught by a girl named Maritan.

The Knights swam like sharks, deep under the surface, grabbing legs as they caught people.

Then it was down to just three people, one of whom was Kylo Ren. Rey thought most of the others hadn’t tried to catch him in case he forgot this was a game.

He was now almost in the shallow end and she considered trying to catch him, but to do that she’d have to touch him and the idea of that gave her goosebumps. 

He caught her looking at him, his gaze holding hers, and Rey’s cheeks heated again and she unconsciously sank further into the water, making him smirk slightly.

And that  _ pissed her off _ , she glared at him and stood back up. She was going to catch that smug muscle-bound git if it killed her.

The Knight who’d started off in the middle shouted, “Bulldog!” And Rey went after Kylo, he’d gone under the water, but when it was this shallow he was easily visible and she launched her whole body at him, pushing him to the floor and throwing her arms around him to arrest his movement.

He turned and stood up, with her still attached to him. “Got you!” Rey said unnecessarily and he laughed.

It sounded nice, she wasn’t sure she’d heard such a warm sound emanating from him before.

“You can let go now.” He said, mouth quirked in amusement, eyes molton brown.

Rey found her cheeks colour  _ yet again _ , and quickly moved off him. Now he was in the shallow water she found she could see too much detail of his body... it was distracting. 

She unconsciously rubbed her hands against her thighs, trying to get rid of the tingle she’d felt from touching his skin.

His gaze on her suddenly felt hot, as if it was a physical thing and she found herself sinking into the water up to her shoulders again.

For a moment something like disappointment flashed across his face.

“Bulldog!”

That got their attention and Kylo surged away from her, under the water after one of the Knights who was left.

Rey released a breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding.

“Holy shit, you dreamt about  _ Kylo Ren _ didn’t you?!” She  hadn’t noticed Finn standing a few feet away until he spoke, his eyes wide and incredulous. 

Rey groaned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my amazing beta, Autonomee for working so quickly <3


	20. Shark Boy

 

 

Kylo had been delighted Rey had taken the bait, even more so by how much contact she had used to catch him.

He’d wanted to tussle with her a little under the water but had stood up as he remembered she probably didn’t know how to control her breath yet.

She was still clinging to him like a limpet, and crowed “Got you!” so triumphantly he laughed.

He caught Ismasta watching them and frowning so he smirked at him over Rey’s head before looking back down at her, “You can let go now.” He told her, lips twitching in amusement and she let go of him immediately, cheeks flushing and he felt a weird sort of flutter in his stomach. 

She looked good wet,  _ very good _ and he felt his mouth go dry as she disengaged from him, his skin tingling where she had touched him.

Her swimming costume while modest did nothing to hide the small curves at her chest and hips, she was as skinny as he’d expected, but with lean muscles in her arms and shoulders.

Perhaps he had looked at her too intently for she suddenly sank back down into the water.

Then Leonmar shouted, “Bulldog!” And Kylo swam off to try and catch Javiell and give Rey some space.

 

He didn’t make it to Javiell but Zainmar caught him making a boy called Shaadr the winner.

When Kylo looked back to see where Rey was he noticed she was having a whispered conversation with Finn, their heads were close together hiding her expression from him.

“So, I think it looks like I won’t be making a move on the Scavenger then.” Zainmar said quietly to him and Kylo turned to look at him, eyebrow raised.

Zainmar rolled his eyes and Kylo huffed out a sigh in defeat. “Yeah, okay, I like her. Are you happy now?”

Zainmar grinned at him, “I knew it!” He paused thinking then went on, “We could see if people want to play kiss chase?”

Kylo snorted and looked at him in disbelief, “Zainmar, we are not in primary school!”

“What about Starfish?” He countered.

“I really can’t see any of the girls being okay with people swimming between their legs.” Kylo replied dryly.

He was disappointed when other people started entering the pool and it got too chaotic to play Bulldog again.

Kylo frowned when he saw Ismasta sneak up and suddenly put his hands around Rey’s waist in a much too proprietary manner. He couldn't see Rey’s reaction as Ismasta’s body hid her from view but he was pleased to see Finn shoot him a glare.

Zainmar looked at him, “Well you need to do something, or Ismasta is going to beat you to it.”

Kylo frowned, unsure what to do, and Zainmar sighed, “You can thank me later for this,” He said then started towards Poe, “Hey Poe! You fancy a game of chicken? Say, us four against you, Finn, Ismasta and Brobard?” Zainmar indicated himself, Leonmar, Ingalan and Javiell.

Poe looked surprised again- the Knights seldom mixed with other people unless they were intimidating them, then shrugged and nodded and called over Ismasta and Finn, they went, reluctantly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey sloshed quickly over to Finn, “Keep your voice down!” she whispered fiercely at him.

“But, _ Kylo Ren?! _ ” Finn whispered back, Rey was worried his eyes would fall out of his head if he widened them any more.

Rey held onto his arm, ignoring the game finishing behind her, “Yes, okay, I had a dream about Kylo Ren. But in most of it  _ we were fighting! _ It got weird at the last moment and then I woke up.”

Finn darted his eyes behind her and then back to her face, “How weird?”

Rey shifted uncomfortably, “He took off his mask and kissed me. Then I woke up. It was nothing!”

Finn looked at her in disbelief, then choked on a laugh, “His mask?” He asked her.

Rey grimaced, “How about I tell you the details later when no one else is around?”

“Fine. But I will want  _ all  _ of details!” He was grinning so much his dimples showed.

Rey glared at him, and was about to give him a dig in the ribs when hands snaked around her waist making her flinch.

Finn frowned looking behind her, “Ismasta, hands off my Peanut.”

It was such a ridiculous sentence that Rey burst out laughing despite the hands still on her waist.

Ismasta laughed too, “ _ Your _ Peanut? I thought you liked Poe?”

Finn’s eyebrows jerked up almost past his hairline. “It doesn’t matter who I like,” He said a little stiffly, “Rey will always be my Peanut.” 

Rey slipped out of Ismasta’s arms to face him, stepping away, nearer to Finn who slung an arm over her shoulder. “It’s true,” She said to Ismasta grinning up at Finn.

Ismasta looked between the two of them, somewhat confused. Then Poe called to both Finn and Ismasta and they went over leaving Rey alone.

She felt a little self conscious on her own and dipped down into the water, then decided she may as well do a bit of practice swimming, since she was there anyway.

Going hand over hand she moved along the lip of the pool till she was out of her depth and kicked her legs trying to keep up whilst barely gripping the wall.

Suddenly a voice beside her said “Have you tried-” and Rey squeaked and let go of the wall in her surprise then realised her error as she began to sink, and flailed her arms. Strong hands were on her and she was pushed back to the lip of the pool and held up till she grabbed it, panting.

“Sorry,” Kylo Ren said next to her, “Didn’t mean to startle you.”

Rey turned and glared at him, then blinked,  _ was he blushing? _ It was faint but she thought he might be.

He cleared his throat a little, “I was just going to say it might help you be more confident in the water if you learn how to hold your breath.”

Rey blinked at him again, “But don’t you just have to stop breathing?”

His lips twitched in an almost smile, “Well yes, but it is very different to just holding your breath normally…. I could help you, if you like? The others are playing chicken at the moment.”

Rey was extremely surprised to hear herself answer, “Okay then.” Apparently her mouth and brain could work separately sometimes.

“Cool.” Kylo said and handed her a pair of goggles. “You’ll panic less if you can see clearly,” He said to her questioning look.

Rey nodded, it made sense. “You may want to take your hair out, and put the goggles over it, otherwise they may get tangled. I can adjust them to fit once you’ve got them on.”

Rey gave him a amused look but carefully took out her hair- it was already rather tangled and put the three elastics on her wrist, then dipped the back of her head in the water to smooth her hair down and took the goggles Kylo handed her and put them on.

He moved behind her and adjusted the strap till they felt secure. His huge hands were surprisingly gentle.

He moved back to face her, and now he’d taken on the tone of an instructor Rey felt less distracted by his naked torso... a bit less.

He put on his own goggles, “If you grab my shoulders, I can take us down, tap my shoulder twice when you want to go up. You’ll be in control. Take a deep breath, then slowly release it as we go down. Don’t breathe in for obvious reasons.” 

Rey rolled her eyes at that last bit then nodded, “Okay.” 

Kylo turned with his back to her and sank down so she could easily grip his shoulders, she let slip a small gasp when she touched his skin, her fingers tingling.

He must have assumed it was a worried noise as he said, “Relax, it will be easier to breathe… I’ve got you. Okay I’m taking us down.”

And Rey found herself sinking down under the surface of the pool, at first she forgot to exhale but as a streamer of bubbles left him and she let out her own, slowly. It was quiet down here, she had to concentrate not to be distracted from the bodies of other swimmers and the way the patterns of light reflected above them.

He was right- the goggles helped, being able to see made her feel safer. They descended until he was crouched on the bottom, then she tapped his shoulder as she’d run out of air and he was pulling her back up and to the lip of the pool.

“Are you okay?” Kylo asked whilst she took several deep breaths in.

“Yeah, I’m good, thank you… Could we try that again?” Rey asked a bit shyly.

“Sure. Try and see if you can stay down for a bit longer… If you like you can put your hands on my shoulders from the other side and you can watch how I breathe?”

“If you think that will help, sure.” She said calmly, feeling anything but.

He turned to face her and she awkwardly put her hands on his shoulders, “Okay, take a big breath in” He said then put his hands on her waist and drew her down with him.

She watched his mouth and chest carefully, not meeting his eyes, very aware of his hands holding her waist.

They hit the bottom of the pool and both knelt as they exhaled together, Kylo dropped down more than her so they were face to face.

Rey lasted longer than last time and when she tapped Kylo’s shoulder he drew her close to him and kicked off the floor, using his legs to push them upwards whilst his arms were on her.

He again guided her to the pool edge.

“That was better,” he said as she caught her breath. “How would you feel about doing it again but when we hit the bottom you get back to the surface under your own steam? Swimming comes fairly naturally when you’re trying to reach the surface, and I’ll still be with you.”

Rey swallowed, “If you’re sure it’s safe.” She said then grimaced at herself. 

Kylo’s lips twitched like he wanted to laugh at her, but he just said, “It will be fine. Use the floor of the pool to push yourself up to give you an extra burst of speed. You ready?”

Rey nodded and held onto his shoulders again, taking in a deep breath before he took them down.

This time when they knelt on the floor, he let go of her waist and shifted his shoulders so she’d let go of them.

Panic started to bubble inside her but he waved his hand near her face then pointed upward and mimed what she needed to do. She nodded and pushed up off the floor, kicking her legs and arms haphazardly.

Rey reached the surface but started to struggle, Kylo was there in an instant, towing her back to the edge of the pool.

He grinned at her as she caught her breath again, “I’ll give you an A for effort but your technique is a disappointing F.” He said.

Rey let out an indignant noise and poked him hard in the ribs, to her annoyance it just made him laugh.

“You are a complete git wizard Kylo Ren.” She told him flatly, but he just laughed more.

Rey splashed water in his face. “This is so unfair, I can’t jump you at this depth cos I’ll just sink.”

Kylo’s eyes glittered wickedly, “We can go to the shallow end if you like  _ Scavenger. _ ”

“Oh, it is  _ so on _ , Shark Boy!” And Rey started making her way back to the shallow end, hand over hand along the lip of the pool.

He laughed and grabbed her, swinging her round so she could grab his shoulders, “We’ll get there a lot quicker this way.” He said and started swimming towards the other end of the pool.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: In case you are wondering, Starfish is a game you play in water, it is a tag game- every time whomever is ‘it’ touches you, you freeze with your legs open and have to wait till someone swims between them before you can move again, when ‘it’ has frozen everyone the game is over…. On land the game is called Stuck In The Mud, same rules.


	21. Breath Of Life

 

Kylo was  _ fast _ , Rey could feel the muscles in his shoulders bunch under her hands. It was less like swimming and more like forcing his way through the water.

Though considering when he walked it was like he was punishing the ground for a past transgression his style of swimming shouldn’t surprise her.

He stopped and stood up, she automatically let go of his shoulders but grabbed him again when she realised her toes didn’t quite touch the bottom yet.

This seemed to amuse him no end and he chuckled as he pulled her farther up the pool till she could stand unaided.

So Rey kicked him in the back of his knee, eliciting a grunt of surprise; his body started going down and she jammed a foot on the opposite hip, and climbed him like a tree till she had most of her weight on his upper torso then pulled him down and backwards.

She held her breath as they hit the water, grateful she still had her goggles on. Kylo twisted as they went down, so their bodies shifted and she was above him when his back met the floor of the pool.

Kylo grabbed her round the waist from behind her, pinning her arms to her body and stood up out of the water, they both took in a breath then she started struggling, his smug chuckle sounding in her ear.

Rey managed to lift an arm slightly and elbowed him in the ribs and kicked backwards, connecting with his leg but unsure where exactly. 

Suddenly he was bending down, catching her thigh in one hand and her shoulder in another then lifted her up and slammed her back down into the water.

She let herself go down, and turned to grab one of his legs, jerking her full weight against it, he flew backwards and joined her in the water again and she latched her legs around his torso and squeezed like she had in their MMA class, he struggled upwards getting his feet beneath him again and stood, trying to grapple her off him before she could successful hook her ankles together.

“ _ What the hell are you two doing _ ?” Came an incredulous voice, and they both froze for a second before Rey let go of Kylo and fell into the water.

She got her feet beneath her and stood, unable to stop herself from giggling when she saw Finn standing a few feet away looking horrified.

Rey shrugged at him, “I was teaching Kylo a lesson in humility.” She said grinning.

Kylo snorted, “Oh really? From where I was standing I’m pretty sure I was kicking your arse.”

Finn looked between the two of them in disbelief, “You mean, you were  _ play fighting _ ?”

Kylo looked amused as Rey made an indignant sound, “No. We were sparring. In water.” She suddenly grinned again, “I just realised we went under a few times and I held my breath - no panicking.”

Finn rolled his eyes and put his hands on his hips, “Of course.  _ Of course _ you would need some sort of violence involved to be able to learn to swim.”

Rey opened her mouth to disagree and Kylo nodded his head sagely, “He has a point, Scavenger.”

She glared up at him, “You’re only agreeing cos you were  _ losing _ , Shark Boy.”

Kylo only grinned down at her, “We can have a rematch anytime you like,  _ Scavenger. _ ”

Rey made to move towards him but Finn caught her arm. “Maybe another time. Somewhere dry, where you can breathe and stuff and you aren’t endangering anyone else but yourselves. Come on Peanut, we’re going in the Sauna.”

Rey shot Kylo a glare that turned into a bit of a grin, then allowed Finn to tow her away to the steps.

“What’s a Sauna?” She asked curiously.

“It’s like a hot room you sit in, but it’s really hot and it’s a good place to relax in. It’ll probably remind you of home.  _ But _ what the hell was going on though, Peanut? We’d just finished playing chicken and I turn around to see you fighting Kylo Ren! Are you mad?”

Thankfully Finn had his voice down pretty low, Rey flushed a little, suddenly realising that she had just _wrestled,_ with _Kylo Ren,_ whilst wearing _practically_ _nothing,_ whilst _in_ _water!_

“ _ Shit _ !” She said, more to herself than to Finn.

Finn nodded and said “Uh huh.”

He led her to a small cabin like room at the opposite end of the pool to the changing room entrance. He opened the door and quickly closed it after them, Poe was already in there as was Jess who was draped over a boy called Kalhale.  _ How many boyfriends does Jess have? _ Rey wondered.

She took a breath then coughed on the dry air. Finn pulled her down to sit with him. “Ah! How are you meant to breathe in here?” She asked between coughs.

Poe laughed, “I thought you’d be right at home, Jakku’s a desert right?”

“Well yeah, but it’s always like that, my lungs aren’t used to changing the type of air so suddenly I guess…” Rey coughed. “And this isn’t quite the same as desert air. I can’t really explain it.”

Rey lasted a few minutes but couldn’t seem to catch her breath and started feeling dizzy.

She shook her head at Finn, “I think I’m done,” She said quietly, “I’ll go hit the showers, but you should stay here,” She directed her gaze meaningfully over at Poe, “There is a space next to him, go take it when I leave.”

Finn opened his mouth to protest and she gave him a hard look, but spoilt it a bit by coughing. He laughed then nodded, “Okay Peanut, see you later for dinner. Don’t think we’ll be that long, meet you in the reading room?”

Rey smiled and nodded instead of answering because she had to cough again.

When she hit the air outside the little room she felt even more dizzy and had to pause a moment before walking carefully round the pool towards the changing rooms.

She was aware again of her state of undress so she kept her eyes on the floor to avoid looking at anyone else.

_ That _ was a stupid thing to do.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo watched Finn draw Rey away fighting a smile, as they got out and walked to the Sauna he took a moment to appreciate her legs and behind then made his way over to the other Knights who were hanging in the shallows chatting.

“So, did you win chicken?” He asked casually as he joined them.

Javiell gave him surprised look, “Of course we did.” He said, slightly indignant Kylo had even needed to ask.

Zainmar smirked at him, “Do you enjoy your…  _ game _ ?”

Ingalan looked very amused, “It looked like you were trying to kill each other.”

Kylo shrugged nonchalantly, “I was helping her learn to swim… and how to lose.”

Leonmar laughed, “I’m not sure she lost anything.”

Kylo grinned, “All the more reason for a rematch I’d say.” They laughed.

They started debating whether Jessika Pava had an official boyfriend and if she did who it was - no one seemed to be sure.

Kylo half listened, absently thinking about the - what had Finn called it? His and Rey’s  _ play fight,  _ when he saw her come out of the Sauna. 

She’d only been in there five or so minutes, she came out coughing and swayed a little bit like she was dizzy, before starting to carefully walk around the pool.

He frowned as he saw Artumat Rowgerm behind her, he was just about to call a warning to her when Artumat shoved her sideways as hard as he could.

Artumat was large, twice her size and she’d already been unsteady on her feet, Kylo watched with alarm as Rey went flying into the air and crashed down into the deep end of the pool, she’d been halfway through a yell when she’d hit the water, she wouldn’t have any breath.

“Get him.” He snarled at the others then surged forward diving under the water and racing to get to Rey.

Other people had seen and were on their way too, but he got there first. He couldn’t see any bubbles, she wasn’t moving.

He felt ice slide down his spine, she must have breathed in accidentally. He grabbed her and hauled her with him to the surface, Ingalan was at the edge of the pool and pulled her dead weight up onto the side of the pool, Kylo heaved himself out as they knelt around her.

“Shit Kylo, she isn’t breathing,” Zainmar said in a panicked voice as Ingalan turned her over and thumped her between the shoulder blades.

“Put her back on her back,” He grated out and then started doing chest compressions and breathing into her mouth.

There were people shouting, jostling, running, but he worked with a single mindedness that shut everything but what he was doing out.

It wasn’t working, but he didn’t know what else to do, he could feel panic start to rise up inside him, almost choking him but he couldn’t let it,  _ he had to breathe for her. _

Suddenly she made a noise, a coughing gurgle and Ingalan pushed Kylo away and turned her over so she could cough out the water in her lungs.

Kylo just sat there, breathing harshly like he’d just run a marathon, relief pouring through him making him slightly dizzy.

He watched her as she choked and coughed out what looked like half the pool, the breath sawing in her throat with a painful sound.

Suddenly Finn and Poe were pushing others aside, Finn dropping down on his knees to gather her to him, stark fear etched on his face.

He murmured in her ear as she coughed. 

“What the fuck happened?” Poe asked Kylo, it was the first time Kylo could ever remember seeing him angry, but he didn’t have the wits to answer, he was still spiralling inside.

“Artumat Rowgerm practically body slammed her into the deep end.” Ingalan said, even he seemed furious, “ _ Kylo _ just saved her life.”

Poe did several blinks in a row clearly not expecting that answer, then pulled an angry frown, “What the fuck does that shithead have to do with Rey?”

The other Knights looked at each other, clearly Rey hadn’t told anyone about her altercation with Hux and his lackeys last night.

“I punched him in the balls last night when he and Hux jumped me on my run.” Rey rasped, then coughed again. 

Finn helped her sit up looking angry, “ _ Why didn’t you tell me _ Peanut? We almost just lost you!  _ I almost lost you. _ That’s not okay!”

Rey managed a small shrug, “I forgot.” She said and coughed again, someone handed her a bottle of water but she shook her head; someone else wrapped a towel about her, Kylo noticed she was shivering.

“Would someone please tell me what is going on here?” Everyone froze, then most people went quickly away as Luke walked up to the group still on the floor.

“I’d like to know why Artumat Rowgerm is sitting in the lobby still in his wet swimming trunks trying to stop a broken nose bleeding.”

There was a pause then everyone started talking at once, until Luke silenced them with a look. It wasn’t his usually calm face, Kylo noticed with interest.

“Mr. Dameron, would you kindly speak for everyone else please.”

Poe shifted his feet and nodded, “I didn’t see it actually happen, but Artumat Rowgerm roughly pushed Rey into the pool and she stopped breathing… Kylo gave her CPR. I don’t know why Artumat’s nose is broken though.”

Luke’s gaze flickered briefly to Kylo, surprise showing for a second. “I see. Who  _ did  _ see everything?”

The Knights all raised their hands, Kylo noticed Zainmar wiped a little blood of his knuckles onto his black swim shorts.

“Okay, Ingalan, you’re generally sensible, what happened?”

“Artumat basically body slammed Rey into the pool, she must have inhaled, we swam to go and help her but when Kylo got her out she wasn’t breathing or responding, Kylo did CPR till she choked up the water. I don’t think anyone knows how Artumat got a broken nose. Maybe he fell when he ran away.” Ingalan said the last flatly, Luke just nodded.

“All right, you lot can go.” The Knights started to leave but Kylo stayed where he was, “That means you too Kylo. Go on… and well done.”

Ingalan pulled Kylo up by the arm and then he was walking away, but not without one last look back at Rey, still unable to believe she was alive.

“Are you alright?” Ingalan asked when they were a good way away from Luke.

Kylo nodded, “Yeah… But that was  _ close _ …” He brought his eyes up and looked at Zainmar, who gave him a lopsided smile. “Broken nose huh?”

Zainmar grinned, “Well you said to get him so we did. He deserved it, he would have got more but he ran away like a little bitch.”

Kylo nodded, then took a deep breath, “I need a drink, probably three.”

Leonmar smiled, “Now that sounds like an excellent idea. I have some Firewhiskey under my bed.”

Kylo let out a breath, “Perfect.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey was still trying to breathe and process what had happened…. And she very much wanted to know if it had been a spur of the moment decision made by Artumat or if Hux had had a hand in it.

“How are you feeling Rey?” Luke asked her gently, he was kneeling down, looking her over keenly, “Do you know if you banged your head at all?”

Rey shook her head slightly but it made the world spin alarmingly so she rasped, “I don’t think so. I think I’ll be okay now.”

Luke frowned at her, “You should go to the nurse, Poe could you find Jessika and ask her to help Rey get changed, if you think you’re okay to Rey?”

Rey nodded and Poe went off. 

“I don’t think I need the nurse. It’s only my throat that hurts, can I just hang out with Finn and if he thinks I need to go to the nurse he can take me?” Rey really didn’t want to visit the nurse twice in one week.

Luke frowned but nodded, “Okay if you are sure. Do you have any idea why Artumat Rowgerm would do this? Do you think it was a joke that went wrong?”

Rey was aware of Finn opening his mouth but she beat him to it, “I don’t know why he did it, Master Luke,” And she wasn’t lying, she didn’t know, _ precisely. _

Luke gave her a level look but they were distracted by Jess and Poe coming up, Luke stood and Finn helped Rey to her feet, towel still around her shoulders, he must have felt the fine trembling of her limbs but didn’t mention it in front of Luke.

“All right then, Jessika please help Rey get changed, Finn you are in charge of her this evening, take her to the nurse if you think she needs to go. I will go and have a chat with Mr. Rowgerm.”

Luke glided off and Jess flung her arms around Rey, “Oh my stars, I thought  _ you were dead,  _ Rey!” she almost sobbed.

Rey patted her back awkwardly, looking at Finn in astonishment. “It’s okay, Jess, I’m fine.”

Finn put his arm around her and gave her a tight look, “Peanut, you weren’t breathing… that is pretty close to dead.”

Rey frowned back, “But I’m fine now.” She said somewhat feebly. 

Poe joined in and it became a group hug, “I don’t think you get it Rey, you were  _ basically dead _ … And  _ Kylo Ren saved your life.” _

Rey froze, then coughed and they broke apart to give her space, “He what?” She said once she got her breath back.

Finn nodded, “He pulled you out of the water and gave you CPR till you were breathing again.”

Rey blinked, “Well shit.” And Finn nodded again. They had started to walk to the changing rooms when she asked, “What’s CPR?”

Finn looked astonished for a moment, then a tiny bit amused, “It’s how you resuscitate someone who isn’t breathing, sometimes it’s called  _ mouth-to-mouth... _ ”

He watched her face in amusement as she worked out what that would entail, then actually grinned as she brought her hands to her mouth in horror and flushed a deep red.

But then he was there, holding her up as she coughed again, muttering apologises. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: It should go without saying but i will anyway, If you do drown and are resuscitated, or a friend drowns, call for an ambulance immediately. Even if you/they feel fine.
> 
> This chapter was brought to you by two songs: "Breath Of Life" by Florence + The Machine and "A Drowning" by How To Destroy Angels.
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	22. Storm In The Quiet

Jess wouldn’t let Rey change in a cubicle, though she did hold a towel up so Rey had some privacy as she awkwardly got changed.

She was still coughing a lot which made her quite dizzy, her lungs and throat burning as if they were on fire.

Once she was clothed Jess made her sit on a stool and dried her hair for her, then gave her a complicated looking braid.

Rey let her, Jess seemed more upset by Rey’s experience than Rey was and for some reason that made her feel guilty. But there was something wrong and very intimate about someone else touching her hair.

When they entered the lobby they found Finn, Poe and Ismasta waiting on the sofas for them, Finn bounced to his feet as if he’d been fired from a cannon.

“You’re shivering, Peanut,” He said as he took her arm, he let go and took his hoodie off and pulled it over his head before she could answer.

She thrust her arms into the sleeves and gave him a small smile, it was big and just as snuggly as she remembered.

Poe took her bag and Finn insisted he hold her arm as they walked straight to the refectory.

As soon as they entered, there was a buzz of conversation and people started coming up to them to ask what happened.

Poe and Jess shooed them all away irritably, which was an unusual emotion for both of them. People soon got the message but it didn’t stop them from staring.

Finn insisted Rey have some soup as she didn’t think she could swallow anything that wasn’t a liquid yet, she acquiesced and then found once she had started she was actually really hungry and finished the whole bowl, making Finn beam at her like a mother over a recalcitrant child who’d just done as she was asked for the first time ever. 

Rey rolled her eyes at him. They talked about mundane things as they ate and she listened with only half an ear as she pondered whether Artumat had just seized the opportunity on his own or if he’d had instructions from Hux. It seemed to her that it hadn’t seemed quite Hux’s style - it had been too public, and had Artumat even been aware she couldn’t swim?

_ And _ she wondered who had broken Artumat’s nose… and then she wondered about Kylo Ren.

She shivered slightly as she thought about his mouth upon hers…  _ would she be dead now if he hadn’t been there? _

She shivered again and Finn noticed, “I think it’s time we take you back to the dorm, Peanut.”

She nodded absently and they stood, Finn’s arm around her shoulders, his warmth seeping into her.

Just as they were about to go out the door Hux entered, he paused seeing Rey and his lackeys stopped just behind him.

Poe and Jess stood in front of Rey, faces angry.

Hux’s face was unreadable, no hint of triumph or satisfaction.

“Get out of the way, Hux.” Poe said in a hard voice.

Hux’s eyes tightened at that but he moved without comment and Rey and her friends went out.

It was a puzzling exchange and Rey frowned all the way back to the dorm.

The movie room was taken so they settled in the common area, Finn pulled Rey down onto a sofa with him and she curled up against him.

Poe bustled off and came back a bit later with a steaming mug of tea and a blanket, Rey was impressed to find he’d managed to get her particular brew right.

They were joined by the rest of Poe’s year twelve friends and they sat around talking and playing card games; Rey let the talk wash over her, basking in Finn’s warmth and sipping her tea covered in the blanket Poe had bought her. The tea soothed her abused throat, making her sigh happily to herself.

“Peanut?” Rey blinked owlishly and looked up at Finn, he smiled, “Want me to see if I can sneak into the girls dorm and bunk with you tonight?” He asked quietly.

Rey stared at him, shocked that such an idea sounded so good, but she shook her head, “I don’t want you getting into trouble Finn, and I think if you were caught up there, you would be in a  _ lot of it, _ but thank you.”

“We could ask Jess to?” He asked, voice still low, but again she shook her head.

“I don’t know her well enough, I think you are the only person in the world that would be... safe.”

Finn raised his eyebrows and she explained, “I don’t mean Jess would hurt me, rather, I may hurt her - a lifetime habit of sleeping with a knife in my hand is hard to break.” She gave him a lopsided smile, but he frowned at her, clearly unhappy.

She snuggled closer to him, cradling her empty mug in her hands and he sighed in resignation, pulling her tightly to him with his arm.

Finn suddenly chuckled to himself and Rey could feel the vibrations through his chest into her cheek, she looked up questioningly. 

Finn grinned at her, “I do believe you owe me a description of your Kylo Ren dream.”

Rey blushed and groaned, “I can’t believe you remembered that!”

His grin got wider, “Uh huh, this is  _ not _ something I was likely forget in a hurry,  _ now spill _ .”

“Can’t I tell you when there are less people around?” She almost whined and he chuckled.

“No deal, Peanut, just whisper in my ear.”

Rey huffed in annoyance, “Fine,” Finn leaned down and she whispered in his ear a condensed account of her dream and how it ended.

Finn seemed almost disappointed, “And that was what made you blush so much? Bloody ashes have you never kissed anyone before?”

He meant it as a joke but one look at her face and his jaw dropped, “Shit! You’ve never kissed anyone have you?”

Rey moved away from him slightly and crossed her arms and said stiffly “No. Before coming here I mainly thought about surviving; attaching my face to someone else's never really seemed to be important.”

Finn pulled her against him again, “No wonder you freaked out when you discovered what CPR is.”

“Finn!” She exclaimed indignantly and he laughed while she glared at him.

“What’s all the ruckus?” Said Poe as he sat down on Rey’s other side, Finn grinned at him and lent past Rey but before he could say anything she interjected, “If you tell him Finn, I will gut you like a grunter.”

Poe’s eyebrows raised but Finn just laughed at her. “Fine, I won’t  _ tell _ him, but I will say I just found out that there is something Rey has never done before that surprised me.”

Poe’s face took on a thoughtful expression and Rey poked Finn hard in the ribs but he continued to laugh at her and she made a sound of disgust at him.

Like the guessing game about her dream, this also became a game, the others joining in till Rey covered her head in the blanket, much to their amusement.

After twenty minutes she’d had enough, “Ugh!” She said as she pulled the blanket back down, “Fine, if I tell you will you all shut up?” There was a collective nod, “It’s not very exciting.” She began then dug Finn in the ribs again because she could feel him nodding his head in contradiction to what she just said.

“It is  _ not exciting _ .” She said again firmly, “Finn just found out I’ve never kissed anyone, that’s all.”

Everyone seemed shocked, it was ridiculous, then they all started talking at once.

“Oh my stars Rey, we have to change that!” That was Jess.

“We could play spin the bottle now!” Ismasta said.

“We could play cards and the winner gets to help you out?” Said Brobard.

“What the hell was wrong with guys in Jakku?” Said Poe.

“What’s your guy type?” said Maritan.

“Is there anyone you fancy in our dorm?” said Kenjad.

Finn wrapped his arm around her, “Okay people break it up, she isn’t meat at a market place, she isn’t going to go off or anything.”

Rey gave him a sour look, “Couldn’t keep your mouth shut, huh?” He at least had the decency to look a bit guilty now.

“I could, you know, start you off if you’re worried about it?” He said hesitantly. 

Rey raised her eyebrows, “Finn, thanks, I think, but the next person you kiss should be Poe.” She’d said it quietly but he still flicked his eyes nervously to Poe to make sure he hadn’t heard. “You know he likes you right?” She pressed and he shifted nervously against her.

Before he could answer Jess plopped herself on the floor by their feet and looked up at them. “So, Rey,  _ what is _ your guy type?”

Rey shrugged, “Never really thought about it.” She said, yet unbidden came the dream image of Kylo Ren crushing his lips to hers. She shivered slightly.

Jess looked at her blankly. “How can you not have a type?” She looked confused.

Poe laughed at her, “Jess, you’re type only needs a pulse, that isn’t very specific either.”

Jess poked Poe’s leg, “So rude!” But she laughed good naturedly, then looked back at Rey, “So you’ve never, like, thought a guy looked good or dreamt about anyone?”

Finn choked on a laugh at that and Jess looked at him with interest, and then light dawned on Poe’s face, “Hold up, you had that sexy dream a few nights ago when we were watching the movie?”

“Ooooo!” Jess almost wiggled with excitement. “Can you remember who it was about? Or wait, we have been assuming you like guys, is that wrong?”

Finn laughed even more as Rey blushed crimson, Poe looked at her thoughtfully and shook his head, “Nope, I am pretty sure she’s into guys.”

Jess shook her head, “I wouldn’t be so sure, she’s a fairly androgynous dresser, does a lot of fighting and goes to workshop instead of art or textiles.”

“I am  _ right here _ you know.” Rey said to them indignantly, they just grinned. “Stereotypes aside, I don’t actually know if I’m gay or straight, I literally haven’t ever thought about it.”

Finn coughed, “Maybe, but the person in the dream you had,  _ was _ male.” If he was trying to be helpful, he was failing.

“So you  _ do  _ remember!” Jess said eagerly. “Was it someone at school?”

“Oh _ hell no _ .” Rey said, “I am so not telling  _ anyone else _ who was in it. Finn worked it out, and if he doesn’t keep it to himself,” She levelled a dangerous look at him, “He will  _ very much _ regret it.”

Jess sat back on her heels looking sulky, and Poe tapped a finger against his lips, face thoughtful.

Rey huffed out another grumpy sigh and settled back next to Finn. To her relief the conversation turned to other things and she slowly dozed off.

 

Rey awoke to Finn gently stroking her hair, “Hey Peanut,” He said as she opened her eyes, “Think it’s time you got to bed, you feeling okay?”

She nodded sleepily, “I’m just tired, though my throat still hurts.”

“Let’s get you some water, then you need to go to bed.” He shifted and stood up, making her almost topple into his vacated space, he steadied her then helped her up they went to the kitchen.

Normally she would be fully awake, there were people surrounding her she didn’t know, her natural distrustfulness should have been like a bucket of ice water poured over her, but there was just something about Finn’s presence that made her feel safe. That, and she was incredibly sleepy.

She obediently drank some water and took the refilled glass with her when she went up the stairs after giving Finn a last hug goodnight.

She got into her nest fully clothed, just able to shuck her shoes before curling up and letting oblivion take her.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In her dream, she was in a green wood, the green was so vibrant it almost hurt her eyes and she could barely believe that so much green could exist in the universe. 

But she was being hunted, something was after her, there were frightening sounds that she couldn’t seem to pinpoint, the gun in her hand trembled and she wished with everything in her being she had her staff with her instead. 

She retreated into a gully, its walls rising up around her, about twelve foot high, shadows looming in the crevices and dead ends.

Her breathing was ragged, too loud despite her trying to calm it. She swivelled her head back and forth as she slowly made her way through, trying to see in every direction at once.

Then suddenly, he was there. Emerging from behind a large rock not fifteen feet away from her, his black robes and terrifying mask strangely familiar to her, but she couldn’t think where from. He ignited a sabre made of red light, it crackled angrily at her, pulsing hungrily like it would soak up all the light in the world.

She gasped and her finger reflexively pulled the trigger on the gun she held, it shot red beams of light, not bullets, but she didn’t have time to be confused as she scrambled away from him, he deflected the beams from her gun with his sabre of light, the noises it made making her skin prickle with fear.

She soon realised she was never going to make a successful hit so she turned and scrambled up a steep slope, hoping her pursuer wouldn’t be as quick or as agile as she.

She turned to see if he was still following, but he was there and she tried in vain to shoot him again. She got off three shots, he deflected them easily then reached out a commanding hand at her and suddenly her right arm holding her gun was pulled behind her and she realised with horror she was somehow frozen, unable to move.

He stalked around her, yet she couldn’t even turn her head to see him. All the hair on her skin stood up in goosebumps as she panicked inside, trying desperately to move,  _ anything. _

“The girl I’ve heard so much about.” He spoke behind her, his voice deep and distorted, like some kind of monster.

“The droid,” Suddenly the tip of the furious sabre of light was swung at her head, coming to rest mere inches from left side of her neck, “Where is it?”

Rey didn’t know what he was talking about, she felt like she should remember but her mind was scrambled, a maelstrom inside her head blowing any cognizant thought to smithereens.

He made his way back into her line of sight, sabre somehow gone and he stretched out a hand as he had done to freeze her, this time mere inches away from her face.

**_Pain_ ** . It felt like tiny razor sharp teeth were trying to rip her mind apart, clawing away inside her skull.

“The map. You’ve seen it.” There was a hint of surprise in his soft menacing tone, he was so close to her now she thought she may faint, her fear was like a rabid thing, destroying any hope she had of escape.

His presence pressed in on her, everything about this,  _ this creature _ seemed to weigh her down, diminish her somehow.

“Sir!” Someone called and he snapped his attention away from her, “Resistance fighters- we need more troops.”

Rey inhaled a breath as he walked a few feet away from her.

“Pull the division out,” The creature answered, “Forget the droid-”

And that was the last thing she heard, for darkness rushed up to drown her, like a crushing black sea whipped by the storm to end all storms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey woke up, gasping for breath, for a moment she didn’t know where she was,  _ who  _ she was, and she struggled against her duvet and blankets as if they were arms restraining her.

Her body shuddered as she suddenly couldn’t breathe and coughed as if her lungs would come out of her throat.

She suddenly, desperately wanted Finn, his arms around her, his warmth... His name helped her remember who she was and everything came back to her. She groped around and found the water she had brought up with her, gulping it so greedily she made herself cough again.

Once she had stopped, she drank more slowly, letting the water soothe the burning as she let it trickle down her throat.

She left some in case she needed it again, then settled back down into her nest. But everytime she closed her eyes the black waves came for her and she’d snap awake, panting with fear.

This was no good,  _ she needed Finn. _

She quickly changed out of her school clothes that she had slept in and put on her jeans, a t-shirt and her soft boots.

Taking a few steadying breaths she climbed out of her window and hauled herself up on the roof.

She padded along, refusing to listen to the voice inside that was trying to point out this was a stupid idea.

All the boys rooms on the top floor belonged to the Knights, she had a feeling they wouldn’t dob her in if she asked them to get Finn for her.

She lowered herself down to the middle one of the five windows, luckily the window was a jar and she slipped easily inside.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

After they had changed, Kylo and the others had gone straight to the refectory to eat, he was still a little dazed, still so full of relief that Rey was alive that he didn’t have room for anger yet. 

It would come, he knew, but he didn’t rush it. 

Once they were back in the dorm they’d gone to Leonmar’s room and played cards, consuming two bottles of Leonmar’s Firewhiskey supply and a bottle of Goldschläger Javiell had produced.

It was 4am and Kylo was now lying in his bed, half asleep, floating in a pleasant alcohol induced haze.

Consequently he assumed the shadow that dropped lightly onto his windowsill wasn’t real and watched with vague interest as it lifted up his window and slipped into his room.

Whatever it was it was breathing harshly, taking almost panicky breaths as it moved slowly into his room, he sat up slowly, curiosity cutting through the fog a bit.

The shadow emitted a startled, unmistakably girlish gasp at his movement, dancing away from him a few steps before stopping.

“Kylo?” Came a nervous whisper. 

“ _ Fuck. Rey _ ?” He answered, words slightly slurred.

The shadow stepped forward, resolving into the scavenger, her face tight with fear, chest still moving too quickly as she breathed.

He moved to stand up and she suddenly turned her back on him, another shocked gasp escaping her, “Are you wearing any trousers?”

That amused him and he chuckled, “Yeah.” He said, letting the covers fall off. “What are you  _ doing  _ here Rey? ...Not that I’m complaining.” He added absently.

She turned back to him and gave a confused shake of her head then delicately sniffed him, “Are you drunk?”

He gave her a lopsided smile, “Yeah. I needed it after.. You know…” He peered at her closely, “You okay? You look… scared.” 

She shook her head, though not in denial, “I need Finn. I’m sorry I woke you up but could you get him?”

Kylo raised his eyebrows at her, “I thought he liked Poe?”

She made a vexed sound, “Not like that I… I had a nightmare and now I can’t sleep and I keep freaking out and I know he’ll make me not… be frightened anymore.” Her voice sounded pained.

Kylo sighed, “I’m sorry, if I go down to his room I’ll wake everyone up, I don’t know which bed he is in, not even completely sure in which room… Look… You can stay with me if you want.”

Rey peered up at him, face a wash of various emotions his drunk state didn’t allow him to interpret.

She shivered suddenly and in his inebriated state it seemed the obvious thing to do would be to hug her.

So he drew her tense form in his arms, ignoring her hitched breathing and rested his chin on top of her hair, stroking circles on her back as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

Her body stiffened, like a taut bow, and a shudder went through her, “Shhh, I’ve got you, you’re safe.” He mumbled into her hair, and she slowly went limp in his arms, a tiny, exhausted sob escaping her.

He pulled her gently down onto his bed, with his back against the wall and pulled her back against his chest then drew the covers over them. She shivered and he put an arm over her, tucking her in carefully.

As she relaxed she did a wriggle to get more comfortable and he almost gasped himself and had to carefully think about anything else other than her pressed up against his stiffening body. It didn’t work, but as he waited for her to notice he realised with an overwhelming sense of relief that she was already fast asleep, breathing softly.

He leaned into her and took a breath in, the scent of her skin and hair almost intoxicating, he settled back and listened to her breathe, he was awake for a long time, a smile on his lips that remained, even after he finally fell asleep.

  
  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: If you weren’t sure, “Dob in” means to tell a authority figure that someone else has done something they shouldn’t. Think it is mainly an English saying.
> 
> This chapter I was mainly listening to the Aviators, especially - Wake Me When it's Over and No One Will Save You Now. The title of this chapter is a line from a song called Madness By Ruelle. Check them both out.
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	23. The Morning After...

Rey woke up suddenly, very aware she was not in her nest or even in her room. Her mind scrambled to piece together the night before, as her senses focused she was aware of something  _ very warm _ against her back, and the arm around her,  _ An arm?! _ Tightened its hold, drawing her more firmly against the heat of what had to be someone's body.

_ Oh, shitting hell _ . She had slept with Kylo Ren. What the fuck was wrong with her? 

Her throat tickled and she had to try desperately not to cough and wake him, her cheeks were already a flame as it was. She glanced out the window and realised it was light, if she didn’t want to be seen going back over the roof she had to go  _ now. _

Slowly, carefully she tried to extricate herself from his arm. It was not easy, he was ridiculously strong even when asleep, she noticed a pillow on the floor by the bed and she picked it up and slowly squeezed it in behind her and moved his arm so it clutched that instead of her.

He muttered something unintelligible and gripped it tighter, a small frown forming on his forehead.

She slid off the bed and noticed she still had her clothes and boots on, that at least, was something.

Creeping to the window she checked outside to make sure she couldn’t see anyone, it was clear as far as she could see but that may change, she had to go,  **_now._ **

Slipping out of the window she hauled herself up on the roof, pausing a moment to stifle another cough, then quickly made her way along the other side of the apex crouched low. When she got to what she thought was the right place she peered over to make sure no one was on the field, then swiftly slid down and pivoted into her room.

She fell awkwardly, the sound loud in the morning stillness, and she froze, heart in her throat. But there was no other noise save her breathing.

Rey let go a gusty sigh of relief and then coughed, she grabbed her water from the night before and drank it slowly.

Her clock told her it was already 7.45, thank goodness it was a Saturday and everyone else was savouring the extra time in bed.

She shivered, Kylo had been ridiculously warm and going from that to outside in just a t-shirt had given her a chill.

She shut her window and made her way to the bathroom, standing under the hot water and trying to make sense of the dream she’d that had sent her running scared.

It seemed connected to her previous dream, the man in the mask now unmistakably Kylo Ren, oddly it had felt like a prequel to her first dream. She never had dreams like this…

She shook her head and pulled out the braid Jess had done for her yesterday and washed her hair, muttering to herself about how forgetting everything that happened last night would be the best thing to do, if she thought about it too much she may have another dream. Perhaps telling Finn what had happened in the first one had triggered the second one?

At least Kylo had been drunk, hopefully he wouldn’t remember anything upon waking or would assume it was a dream or something. 

_ Ugh. _ She needed tea. She dried and dressed, put on a squirt of the perfume she liked and went downstairs for tea, shoving anything to do with last night in a box in her head, then buried it as deep as she could.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A cold breeze blew over Kylo making him surface from sleep too early, he grimaced at his aching head, then frowned; had he forgotten something?

He realised he was cuddling a pillow and snorted at himself, throwing it on the floor then stood up and went to close the window.

It was odd, he’d only left it a jar last night, yet now it was fully open. He shrugged to himself then crawled back into bed, he lay, forehead creased as he thought.  _ No, something was definitely missing… _

He turned on his side and caught an enticing smell of hair and skin not his own, he leant over and sniffed the pillow, mind moving sluggishly.

His whole body stiffened when his brain finally identified what he was smelling, or rather  _ whom. _ But it  _ couldn’t be _ … Yet the window was wide open, he shook his head, decided he was still drunk and confused and settled back to sleep, he curled on his side again and that was when he noticed the long strand of straight brown hair on the pillow next to him.

He looked at it in disbelief, his hair was black, wavy and not nearly that long… Rey’s hair was fine, long and brown.

Heat flushed through his body as his memory started to become clearer,  _ she had been right there in his arms. _ He swallowed several times, skin alight and buzzing.

He was still hungover, and needed at least a few hours extra in bed, but he also needed to take care of himself first or he’d never go back to sleep.

It didn’t take him long, he pressed his face against the pillow her head had been on and inhaled her fading scent as he shuddered to completion. 

He cleaned himself off then passed out, a small satisfied smile curving his lips.

 

When Kylo next woke it was because Zainmar was poking him in the ribs. He quickly moved a few steps away when Kylo came fully awake though.

Kylo groaned, “Why the hell are you waking me up?” He grated, rubbing his face and grimacing at the sunlight.

Zainmar ginned at him, “For one, it’s almost lunchtime and as you missed breakfast I figured you’d at least want lunch. And two, I overhead Poe’s lot chatting about your Scavenger…”

Zainmar didn’t finish his sentence, obviously on purpose and Kylo glared at him, “And?”

Zainmar bounced on his heels, “Turns out, she has never kissed anyone, let alone done anything else. It also seems she has recently had a kinky dream about someone and they were trying to work out who it was, as well as trying to decide who gets to make a move on her this evening at the firepit…”

Kylo frowned, then suddenly grinned as he remembered what had happened last night.

“That,  _ was not _ the expression I was expecting from you.” Zainmar said interestedly. 

Kylo stood and stretched, still grinning, “Someday, I may tell you what it was about.” He answered, Zainmar made an indignant noise at him, but Kylo was already heading for the bathroom before the other boy could pepper him with questions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey had sat for quite a while in the reading room before Finn joined her. It seemed everyone slept very late on a Saturday, Finn assured her he was actually up relatively early compared to most of the others.

So it was just she and him who walked over to the refectory, there were a few others there but not many.

To Rey’s excitement, breakfast at the weekends was rather different compared to that for weekdays.

There were fresh fruit salads, exotic juices, fluffy pancakes, warm waffles and pastries with an assortment of jams and syrups.

She and Finn piled their trays high and sat in a sunny corner, arguing about what went best with what.

Rey only managed to get halfway through what she had before she was too full to eat anymore. “I think that is the most I’ve ever seen you eat, Peanut.” Finn said proudly as he took things off her tray to add to his. “Did you have, like, a really good sleep or really energetic dream?”

Rey blushed.  _ Shit. _

Finn raised his eyebrows, “ _ Oh really.” _ He chuckled, “Please tell me it featured a different person to the last dream?”

Rey shifted in her seat, “I don’t know. But it was  _ not _ a good dream. I was totally freaked out.”

Finn lost his smile, “Told you I should have sneaked up to bunk with you.”

Rey nodded unhappily. “How would you feel about climbing out one of the Knights windows and going over the roof to come in mine?” He gave her a disbelieving look but she carried on, “It’s safe, I’ve done it several times now, I was fine.”

“Exactly what do you mean, you’ve done it several times? Climbed into one of the Knights windows?” His voice had gone up a few octaves on the last sentence.

Rey grimaced, “No, I mean I’ve been on the roof a few times…” She paused, but decided against telling him about her… time in Kylo’s room. “But if I can get up and move about you should be able to too.”

“Peanut,” Finn took her hand in his, “I’m saying this from a place of love, but you are  _ mental. _ Why have you been going up on the roof?”

Rey shrugged, “I like climbing, I go up there when I can’t sleep to look at the stars. The gym roof is good too, and it’s flatter so you can go through forms.”

Finn just shook his head at her muttering “Mad, mad, completely certifiable.”

Rey sighed at him, “You are such a drama queen. So I am guessing that is a no to you visiting me via the roof then?”

She held up her hands in surrender when he snorted at her.

Someone behind them cleared their throat awkwardly and they turned to see who it was.

Hux was standing there, his followers still sitting at a table across the other side of the room. Rey immediately tensed and Finn stood up, pushing his chair back angrily, “Leave us alone, Hux.” He said hotly.

Hux gave him a disdainful look, “I want to speak to the Scavenger,  _ alone 2187 _ .”

Finn flinched slightly but didn’t back down. “I _ am not  _ leaving her alone with you, your shithead friend almost  _ killed her _ yesterday!”

Hux grimaced, “I promise I won’t do anything other than talk.”

Finn snorted and Rey put a hand on his arm to calm him, “There is nothing you could possibly have to say to me that I would want to hear.” She said levelly. 

Hux’s face rippled with various emotions then settled into an uncomfortable frown. “ _ Fine. _ I’ll say it with him here...  _ I didn’t know  _ Artumat would do that,  _ I didn’t tell _ him to and  _ neither _ of us knew you couldn’t swim.” Rey stared at him blankly. He bit his lip, looked her straight in the eyes and finished with, “And I’m glad you are okay.” He gave her a small parting nod, then stiffly walked away.

Finn abruptly sat down in his chair and they looked at each other in astonishment. 

“What the hell just happened?” Finn asked her and she shook her head.

“I have no idea.” She answered, totally at a loss.

 

After the odd exchange with Hux, Finn and Rey left the refectory and meandered back to the dorm by the scenic route.

Finn showed her around the garden area that sat between the library and their dorm, it was quite large, with shrubs, trees, flower beds, a nature area with a pond, in it’s centre was a large depression with sawn off logs surrounding a blackened pit.

“This is the firepit,” Finn explained, “We’re allowed to use it on Saturdays to hang out at. Poe and everyone is going this evening and we can too if you like?”

“Sure,” Rey said easily, she liked fire.

Finn beamed at her, “I’m wondering about, maybe, making a move on Poe then.”

Rey grinned at him, “You should definitely do that.”

Finn dimpled, “Never know, you may find someone to have your first kiss with.”

Rey rolled her eyes, “I doubt it.”

Finn frowned at her, “Why not? Is there just no one you like?”

Rey gestured to herself, taking in her worn jeans, faded t-shirt, old boots. “I don’t think anyone here would be interested Finn, I come from a completely different world to everyone else, I’m almost a different species.”

Finn rolled his eyes at her, “You’re overthinking it, Peanut. I’m not suggesting you get married to anyone, just maybe find someone to have a kiss and a cuddle… And you’re wrong. Most of the boy’s have been looking at your face and your arse, not your clothes.”

Rey just smiled at him disbelievingly. After all, he was her friend, of course he would say nice things about her.

They moved on to the dorm, arm in arm. “Jess and Poe decided to take you shopping next Saturday, as they weren’t sure how you’d feel after yesterday.” Finn said and laughed when Rey sighed in relief. “But that means we don’t have anything to do till the firepit this evening. Is there anything you fancy doing?”

“Shouldn’t we be doing homework?” Rey asked surprised.

Finn laughed at her, “Oh my sweet desert rose, o _ f course not. _ Homework should be done the day before it’s due, whilst panicking. And anyway after yesterday you need a nice restful day.”

Rey raised her eyebrow sceptically, “If you say so…”

“I do. So, what do you want to do?” Finn pressed and Rey shrugged.

“I don’t know, free time is sort of a new concept to me…. But maybe… If Poe and everyone felt like it, that is, do you think they would maybe…”

“Stars Peanut, spit it out!” Finn said.

Rey looked at him uncertainly, “Do you think people would be up for playing Bulldog again? On the field though, I don’t want to get back in the pool for a while yet.” She shivered and Finn pulled her close to him as they entered the dorm and sat on a sofa.

“Are you sure you want to do that? Wouldn’t it be best to not do anything too energetic?” He asked, absently smoothing the stray strands of her hair away from her face.

Rey shook her head, “I’ll be fine, to be honest I’m full of energy and if we don’t do something I’ll go for a run.”

“You are so weird, Peanut. But sure, let’s ask everyone when they’re back from breakfast, it shouldn't be long now I think… I’m just going to go and get my other hoodie though, you’re shivering again so I take it you only own t-shirts?”

Rey nodded, “T-shirts and vests, I have arm guards but they’re more for keeping off the sun and protection against injury than keeping me warm. If I ever got cold in Jakku I’d just wrap myself in a blanket.”

“Okay, well you can borrow one of mine till you go shopping. Back in a sec.” And he trotted off.

 

Poe laughed when Finn asked him about playing some wide games. “Sure, why not. Though maybe a bit later? I’m so full of breakfast I don’t think I’ll eat lunch and I’ll definitely bring it up if I start running around right now.”

Everyone else seemed amused but up for it so they made plans to meet a bit later on the field. Then Jessika turned to Rey and took her hand with a firm espression. “Till then, you are coming with Maritan and Kenjad and I to our room so we can find you something to wear tonight.”

Rey looked between Jessika and Finn, confused, “Why?”

Jessika snorted and Kenjad laughed, “You cannot go out this evening just wearing,” Jessika gestured at Rey’s clothes. “Those.”

Rey frowned and Finn broke in, “Don’t be mean Jess, that’s just her style.”

“I’m not being mean!” Jess exclaimed, then more quietly, “I’m not being mean, just, humour me, I want to see what you look like in something different.”

And with that, Rey was hustled away and upstairs by the three girls, silently cursing Finn for not saving her from the abduction.

 

Rey spent a bewildering hour and a half in the girls dorm room, being poked, prodded and ordered to try things on, though she refused point blank to put any dresses or skirts on.

They’d just got to her boots when Rey had had enough, “Nope. No more. Look, it’s sunny outside, let’s go and do something.”  _ Anything else but this. _

Kenjad and Maritan pouted, and Jess narrowed her eyes, “Okay, we’ll go but on one condition.”

Rey had a nasty feeling about that, but asked anyway, “Which is?”

“If we go and play wide games all afternoon with you, you have to let us make you over this evening for the firepit.”

Rey’s face hardened and Jess carried on before Rey could interrupt. “It will not include skirts, dresses or.. Other shoes.”

Rey threw up her hands, “Fine. Now, can we please go?”

They were suddenly all smiles and laughs and they surged around her carrying her with them as they left the room and went down the stairs.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I had ‘Right Here In My Arms’ by HIM in my head when I wrote about Kylo first waking up….
> 
> Autonomee is my wonderful, wonderful Beta <3


	24. Pirates!

 

 

Kylo and the Knights went to lunch early, Leonmar had also slept as late as Kylo, but while Leonmar was sleepy eyed and yawning, Kylo was full of energy, it buzzed in his veins like lemonade.

“You seem awfully chipper considering how much alcohol you put away last night.” Ingalan said halfway through eating.

Kylo smirked at him then shrugged, “Guess I slept well.” Was all he said.

“Hmmm.” Ingalan looked at him closely, then gave his own shrug. “Do we need to do an alcohol run before tonight?”

“I’ve got a load of beer in my room, but I’d need help getting it out.” Zainmar offered.

Kylo nodded, “That’ll do. I don’t want to get really drunk tonight anyway…”

“Why not?” Javiell asked curiously. “Isn’t that what the firepit is mainly about?”

Leonmar snorted, “No, cards in our dorm is for getting really drunk. The firepit is about getting drunk enough to party… Also Kylo will probably end up punching someone if he drinks too much.” Kylo gave him a look but he just smirked, “You know it’s true Kylo.”

Kylo frowned but didn’t disagree… He  _ did _ like punching people, it was true.

“Right, well that frees up the afternoon then…” Ingalan said, “Any ideas? Or should we do some training?”

No one liked the idea of training so they left the refectory and went back to the dorm to see what games consoles were free.

They were going through the common area when Brobard approached them, “Hey, err, it was cool playing Bulldog and Chicken with you guys yesterday. We’re going to go and play some wide games on the field if you fancy joining?”

The Knights stopped in their tracks, surprised, Zainmar said casually, “Yeah, might join you in a bit- we just had lunch…” Brobard nodded in understanding and was just turning away when Zainmar asked, “Who else would be playing?”

Brobard shrugged, “Same as yesterday.” And he wandered back to Poe’s group.

The Knights were silent as they made their way through the kitchen, then Kylo eventually asked, “Do you think that includes the Scavenger?” He tried not to sound like he cared; he failed.

Ingalan smirked at him, “Perhaps, though she did drown yesterday, so she may sit this one out.”

Kylo snorted, “You have met her, right?” Ingalan chuckled. “I take your point… I’m up for it, Jess will be there… Might try laying some groundwork for tonight.”

The buzzing in Kylo’s veins reached fever pitch and he grinned, but he merely said, “Cool, thirty minutes of gaming then outside?”

“Sounds like a plan,” Zainmar said grinning and the others agreed.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

It had taken everyone an inordinately long time to get organised and out to the field. By now there was so much energy surging through Rey that if she didn’t start doing something now, she would punch something, _ or someone. _

“We should start playing something now, or I think Peanut may explode.” Finn said to Poe as they milled about on the grass.

Poe laughed, “Okay Rey, what do you fancy?”

“Can we play Pirates?” She asked immediately, “It’s similar to Bulldog and easy to pick up.” “Sure, tell us the rules.” Poe said easily.

Rey shifted uncomfortably as people looked at her expectantly. “It is quite violent, so not everyone may want to play…”

Everyone laughed. Some of them stopped when she explained the rules. To her pleasure though, only Maritan said she would sit out, they were just trying to decide who would start when Kylo Ren and his Knights sauntered up to them.

Rey froze, willing the colour in her cheeks to kindly  _ fuck off. _ She may as well have asked the sky to turn dark at midday.  _ Who the hell invited them?  _ Maybe the earth would open up and swallow her. Playing Pirates didn’t seem like such a good idea now…

“So what are we playing?” Zainmar asked.

Everyone looked at Rey. She sighed in resignation and carefully did not look at Kylo.

“Pirates.” She said somewhat flatly, then answered Zainmar’s questioning look, “It is somewhat similar to Bulldog, only more… violent. You guys don’t have to play this one.”

Rey heard a snort come from the direction of Kylo, but she didn’t look to confirm it. Zainmar just laughed, “That’s cool,  _ we like violence.  _ What are the rules?”

She really had done one over on herself. Blood and bloody fucking ashes.

“Right, well, the aim is to get from one side to the other, one person starts in the middle, you have to catch the people running from one side to the other and they join you in the middle-”

“That’s just Bulldog,” Javiell interrupted.

Rey almost hissed in irritation. “Yes. But when the person in the middle catches someone, they pin them down and ask, ‘Walk the plank or join the crew’, so, you can either get up and join the crew in the middle, or you can try and get away. You have two chances to get away, on the third take down, you have to join the crew. Whoever is last standing wins.”

The Knights all chuckled. “This sounds awesome,” Zainmar said enthusiastically.

“I should probably add, there are a few extra rules - no biting, hair pulling, scratching, blows to the groin, blows to girls’ chests or eye gouging.”

Everyone looked surprised she even had to mention those rules.

“Ooookay then,” Zainmar said into the shocked silence, “But who starts in the middle?”

Leonmar pulled a deck of cards out from his black hoodie, “How about whoever picks the joker?”

Ismasta ended up with the joker, as he moved to the middle of the agreed area, Poe turned to Rey, “Are you sure you should be playing Rey? After everything that happened yesterday?”

Rey managed to keep from snarling, but only just. “I am fine.” She said shortly.

Finn chuckled, “My Peanut needs to blow off some steam, Poe. It is probably safer for us that she do it now rather than later.”

Rey shot him a flat look but didn’t add any comment.

“Pirates!” Ismasta yelled and everyone started running. He started off going for the easy targets and Finn, Kenjad, Leojova went in the first three rounds, putting up little or no fight. In the fourth round they piled onto Poe and then they started working as a team.

Rey hadn’t even been caught yet and was becoming more disappointed by the second, then the first Knight went down, Rey was surprised, she’d figured they’d be some of the last ones to go. And she was more surprised when Ingalan went on to successfully catch Kylo. She narrowed her eyes at the exchange, though Kylo had struggled to get away, she couldn’t help feeling it had been a charade, come to think of it, so had Ingalan’s capture, what were they playing at?

As Kylo rose up from the ground he looked straight at her, with a small smile.  _ Shit. _

_ Well at least it would get interesting now. _ She snorted at that thought. But she still hadn’t been caught… and if anyone could take a pummelling without a fuss it would be him…

Only Ismasta had gone after her a few times but she was always too quick and he’d settled for going after slower people.

Kylo shot straight for her as someone shouted “Pirates,” and Rey found herself grinning as she sprinted in a zig zag around him.

For the first time since they started playing she felt her adrenaline properly spike, that round, he came within inches of her but had underestimated how quick she was.

The next round he was ready, he grabbed hold of her waist and pulled her down to the ground, she followed him down already twisting his grasp to free herself as they landed in a tangle of limbs, he managed to pin her, her legs between his, his hands holding one arm and a shoulder down, a cocky smile on his face, “Walk the plank or join the crew?”

Rey flashed him a feral grin, “Walk the plank!” She almost yelled and punched him in the gut. His expression of satisfaction turned to one of surprise and she felt a surge of delight as she rocked her hips, threw him partially off her and scrambled out the rest of the way, he managed to yank on her boot but she twisted her foot and shucked it off, doing a lopsided run to safety.

She turned back to see him clutching her boot, looking chagrined and she laughed as she divested herself of her other boot for the next round.

Rey was even swifter running in her socks, but Ingalan had teamed up to work with Kylo and there were many more ‘Pirates’ to dodge which brought her back onto their side of the field.

Ingalan brought her down and Kylo joined him, pinning her on her front this time, he planted a knee on her back and grabbed her wrists  in one big hand. “Let’s try this again shall we? Walk the plank or join the crew?” There was an edge to his voice she couldn’t interpret. 

“Walk the plank!” She answered and started struggling, but it was harder this time, her legs couldn’t reach him where he knelt on her, she pivoted her hips to one side, un-steadying him for a moment, letting his grip on her wrists slacken slightly, but she only got a few feet away from him before he was on her again, she turned a roundhouse kick at him but he only grabbed her foot and hooked his elbow under her knee pulling her close till she was up against his chest, leg still in the air where he held it, her other leg up on her toes, he supported her weight like it was nothing, even when she tried pulling him towards her to unbalance him, his other arm caught her wrists, and he leant down to whisper in her ear “Walk the plank, or join the crew,” his voice was rough and she felt an unexpected heat flush through her.

A small breathless gasp escaped her and he looking straight into her eyes, inches away. It was too intense, she grimaced, “Walk the plank!” She answered and he chuckled disbelievingly. 

She lifted up the leg she was balancing on, then thrust her body downwards catching his instep with her free foot, she was in socks though so it didn’t really hurt him, but at least he was unbalanced and let go of her knee so he would fall. Rey twisted her wrists in his hand all the way round and he let go, then she was running.

It was now just Rey, Javiell and Shaadr left. Before starting the next round, the ’Pirates’ in the middle conferred and split into three groups.

Rey looked at Javiell and Shaadr and grinned, “Shall we spread out?” They returned her grin and nodded. “Good luck!” She called as she walked away from them, giving them space.

Kylo mirrored her, expression determined, Ismasta, Jess and Finn following him.

Rey stretched her legs and her wrists, she had a few surprises up her sleeve. 

“PIRATES!” Someone yelled excitedly and she ran straight for them.

Surprise flickered across their faces and when she was six feet away she bounced on her ankles and flung her body up and forward starting a row of front flips.

Finn completely forgot they were meant to catch her and shouted “Whoooo go, Peanut, go!”

Rey managed six before she had to stop and just as she came out of the last one Kylo was there, this time when he got her on the ground, Ismasta held her legs down and Jess her shoulders, whilst Kylo straddled her hips.

Finn grinned down at her, “So, walk the plank or join the crew, Peanut?”

She huffed in defeat, she could try, but was fairly sure it was impossible, “Join the crew,” she said resignedly and Finn laughed.

Suddenly she squealed and started giggling; someone was touching her feet.

Jess looked at her amused, “You are so weird, Rey!”

“Someone is touching my feet!” Rey gasped through her giggles, Kylo turned and got up, Ismasta was there holding down her legs down, tickling her feet.

Jess let Rey go, “Hey! No fair Ismasta, that’s way too mean!”

Ismasta grinned but let go, leaving Rey gasping.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was feeling irritated and somewhat cheated. Irritated at Ismasta for discovering Rey was ticklish, though Kylo had to admit her giggles had not been what he expected from her, they were surprisingly cute which wasn’t a word he would have applied to Rey before. And cheated, because he had hoped he would have been able to take her down again on his own. 

He had to admit this game was brilliant, he looked at Rey, still lying on the floor, hair a mess and cheeks flushed, and his breath caught in his throat.

_ She had been right there in his arms… _

Finn pulled her up and Kylo fell into step with them as they went over to congratulate Javiell for winning.

Finn went to stand by Poe, and Kylo and Rey stopped on the periphery of the group.

“Did you sleep well, Scavenger?” Kylo asked her casually, turning his head so he could see her reaction. He was not disappointed. Her whole body froze and her cheeks heated even more, she slightly turned her head to glance at him.

“ _ Shit. _ ” She said softly and he allowed himself a small chuckled.

She shifted her feet, “Err, sorry about that… I thought you would have forgotten- you were quite drunk.”

“I was,” He answered easily, then his smile faded, “I needed it after what happened yesterday... I thought you had died...”

She turned to look at him then, an unexpectedly vulnerable expression suddenly on her face, “I don’t think I ever said thank you... I’ve been told you saved my life.”

Kylo shrugged, unsure how to respond. She looked away from him again, “And thanks for last night, for not… I don’t know, but thanks.” She finished awkwardly.

They were still in a bubble of quiet, and he answered quietly, “Anytime. It’s okay- I get nightmares too.”

She looked up at his face in surprise, then gave him a tentative smile. His heart almost burst and he had to clench his hands at his sides to stop himself from pulling her in for a kiss.

Rey noticed and frowned up at him, “Are you okay, Kylo?”

The sound of his name on her lips scattered his thoughts and he answered honestly before he could stop himself, “No. I’m trying very hard not to grab hold of you and kiss you.”

She let out a small gasp, her eyes wide as they looked into his but before she could answer him Finn bounded over to them, “Hey, Peanut! Zainmar suggested we play manhunt next, are you up for it?”

And the moment was lost…  _ He fucking hated 2187. _

  
  


  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay, so I know lots of games in recent chapters, promise manhunt will be the last one! 
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	25. Vir Venari- The Hunt Is On

 

 

Rey blinked at Finn; she felt as if she’d been suddenly awoken from sleep- slightly disoriented. “Of course I’m up for manhunt,” She said automatically, she turned to look at Kylo but he had walked away, his shoulders tense.

Rey wondered what would have happened if Finn hadn’t arrived at that inopportune moment, it felt as if she and Kylo had been on the cusp of something momentous…

“You okay, Peanut?” Finn asked as he draped an arm around her.

Rey shook herself mentally, quashing the feelings Kylo had elicited moments ago and smiled back at Finn, “I’m fine. So, who are the teams?”

They split into two teams, one led by Kylo and one led by Poe. Maritan and Kenjad had gone back to the dorm to chill out but Jess had stayed on.

Kylo’s team consisted of the Knights of course, (Ingalan, Zainmar, Javiell, and Leonmar) as well as Brobard, Shaadr and Ashtjac.

Rey was on Poe’s team with Finn, Jess, Ismasta, Muhager, Kalhale and Leojova.

Rey found and pulled her boots back on whilst they worked out which team was the hunters and which team the prey. 

Poe’s team ended up being prey, and Rey felt her adrenaline spike in anticipation, though the boundary they agreed upon wasn’t huge, at least, not to Rey’s mind.

It was from the back of their dorm, to the far side of the gym, down to and including the tennis and basketball courts, around the back of the library, the gardens and of course the field they were currently on which was in the middle. They weren’t allowed inside any buildings, but to Rey’s satisfaction no one mentioned anything about the sides or tops of buildings. 

The teams separated for a quick chat on strategy before starting.

“Okay people, I think we should split up into twos, though one shouldn’t be held back by the other if it comes to it.” Poe stated.

Finn immediately put his arm around Rey, she looked at him in amusement, “Finn can you climb?” She asked.

He frowned and shook his head, “Then sorry, but you should go with Poe, you won’t be able to follow where I’m going.”

He looked a little hurt so she hugged him, “Doesn’t mean I don’t still love you.”

He smiled back, “Okay, Peanut. So, are any of you good at climbing?” He asked the others.

Ismasta was opening his mouth when Jess grinned at Rey and said first, “I can.” And she came up and linked arms with Rey. “Let’s show the boys how it’s done!” 

“Okay,” Said Poe laughing, “Finn, do you want to come with me?” Finn nodded fervently and Poe dimpled at him before continuing. “Any preference the rest of you?”

Ismasta and Leojova nodded at each other and Muhager and Kalhale looked at each other and shrugged acceptance too.

“Awesome, so, let’s go in different directions too, any preference?”

“Can we have North East,” Rey said immediately, then clarified, “Round the gym,” when Poe gave her a puzzled look.

“Sure,” Poe said, “Finn and I’ll go down to the library area, Ismasta you okay to take the courts and Muhager you guys take the dorm area? Cool, then I guess we’re ready to go?” Everyone nodded and they went over to the other team, who immediately stopped talking when they saw them approach.

“You have two minutes,  _ then we will come for you _ .” Kylo said seriously, He flashed his dark eyes at Rey for a second, and she shivered, it felt as if those words were meant for her.

“When we catch you,  _ you join us _ , and you must pass on any information you have on your ex-teammates plans.”

Rey watched as those words brought about a change in the posture of hunter and prey alike. The hunters seemed to almost grow in stature, take on a threatening aspect. Of course it didn’t help that they had the Knights in their band, all of whom tended to be on the tall, muscular scale.

The prey in their turn started looked shifty, as if they were on the edge of fleeing. And of course they were.

“Go!” Kylo barked at them and they all split off, pounding the earth, hearts racing, adrenaline pumping in their veins. 

Rey had to shorten her stride for Jess, it made her think of her run a few nights ago with Kylo, when he had done the same for her...  _ Could it really have been only two nights ago?  _ It felt so much longer.

She shook her head, she could not think of that right now, not think about  _ him _ . At least not like that.

When she and Jess had cleared the far side of the gym, Rey led Jess to the drain pipe she had climbed previously.

Jess looked at her doubtfully, “Stars, Rey, when you said climb I didn’t expect this!” 

Rey frowned, “I’ve done it before, on Tuesday night, it’s easy and the roof is large and mostly flat, and there are several other places we can get down.”

Jess raised her eyebrows, “If you say so. Perhaps I should go second, I’ll probably be slower than you.”

Rey chewed her lip, if she went first then Jess may be caught and Rey’s position given away, on the other hand if Rey went second she’d be stuck behind Jess. 

“Okay if you’re sure. Our time is almost up.” And Rey started climbing, she was halfway up when what could only be described as a blood curdling  _ war cry, _ floated to their ears from the field on the other side of the gym.

“Shit, Jess,  _ they are coming! _ ” Rey said, climbing quicker. She scrambled over the lip of the roof then turned and laid down on her stomach reaching down to help Jess get up quicker.

Jess gasped as Rey hauled her over the lip and she fell on top of her. Jess quickly rolled over, gasping for breath.

“Shit, I can’t believe we made it! What now?” Jess asked Rey quietly once she got her breath back.

“Now, we crawl away from the edge, as silently as possible.” Rey said and began to do just that.

They stopped in the middle and rested on their elbows, unable to be seen. This also meant they were unable to see, which made Rey uncomfortable but she figured they had at least a little time to have a rest.

Jess smiled up at her, “This was a really cool idea, but what the hell were you doing up here on Tuesday night?”

Rey tried to shrug but couldn’t because she was leaning on her elbows and only managed a sort of hunch, “I couldn’t sleep… I did a lot of climbing back in Jakku, high places were good places to go if you wanted to be left alone. I like to look at the stars.”

Jess just nodded thoughtfully. The silence between them stretched, but not uncomfortably. Occasionally their heads would swivel in the direction of shouts or laughs, but no sounds of climbing came.

“So, tonight,” Jess said eventually, “Reckon you’ll pop your kissing cherry?”

Rey looked at her in bewilderment and Jess let out a soft laugh, “I mean, do you think there is anyone you may like to have your first kiss with?”

“Oh.” Rey said faintly, a faint blush on her cheeks and Jess laughed again.

“I can’t believe you grew up somewhere that sounds so harsh and yet you’re so… innocent. In some ways anyway.”

Rey couldn’t think how to answer such a statement. Jess gave her a gentle smile, “It’s okay, I have a feeling Finn will always be looking out for you now, as will Poe and I.”

Rey felt a warmth grow in her chest as she gave Jess a small, grateful smile. “Thank you, I’ve never had a female friend before… I might not be very good at it, but please don’t think it is because I don’t appreciate it.”

Jess gave her an open mouthed horrified look at that, but Rey put her finger on the other girl’s lips, and cocked her head to the side, listening.

There were male grunts, soft but definitely there, they were climbing up the way Jess and Rey had. Jess stiffened too as she heard, looking at Rey with wide eyes.

There was no where appropriate to hide. “Okay, we are going to run, but stay low, they will have split up and there is no use being seen by the others and met at the bottom. I will go down first. Are you ready?” Rey said and Jess nodded.

They went down the middle to the end rather than come off the side that was next to the field, at least the courts would provide some cover and obstacles.

As they ran they heard the hunters hit the roof behind them, shout and start running. Rey didn’t waste time looking back.

She took the drain pipe, wishing she had gloves on, Jess was seconds behind her but when Rey reached the bottom Jess was only a few feet down from the top, she looked down at Rey, “Go, they’re feet away from me, go!”

Rey gave her a last fleeting look then legged it. At least Jess would slow the hunters in their descent. 

From the roof there came a loud whistle, she thought it was some sort of code or communication. Her neck prickled as she ran through the basketball courts, heading for the path that ran between them and the main school building, it was lower down, providing more cover.

An answering whistle pierced the air, off to the north east, she could hear feet pounding the asphalt.

She ran to the west and into the the small wooded area where her favourite bench was. She picked a large, thick bush and dived inside it, hunching in the small open space in the middle. She pulled Finn’s hoodie over her mouth and tried her best to calm her breathing, pulse hammering in her throat.

The sound of feet and voices burst through the trees and she went perfectly still, barely daring to breathe at all.

Some of them continued running on, though others paused and she could hear low voices murmuring to each other.

The Knights were hard to pick out, they were all in black after all, but she recognised the timbre of Kylo’s voice instinctively. 

The sound of the other feet returned, “We can’t see her Kylo,” She thought that was Muhaga, she wondered how many others of her team were left.

“She was talking about climbing,” Finn said, breathing hard and Rey stifled a betrayed groan.

There was a pause and then she heard Kylo say, “We should check the dorm roof then and perhaps the trees around here too.”

Rey shivered; the quiet, determined command in his voice was… she shook her head,  _ this was not the time. _

So the dorm roof and trees were out. She didn’t have time to reconnoitre the school or library roof.

She chewed her lips again as she thought. If they were heading to the dorm area and garden, they wouldn’t be anywhere near the gym… she smiled to herself in amusement, she could just go back to the gym roof. 

They moved off, but something made her remain where she was, the hair on her arms was still up. Her instincts turned about to be right, almost five minutes had gone by when someone sighed and moved off from the treed area in an easy run.

She waited longer, but the hair had gone down and there was relative silence, so she left the bush cautiously, staying low to the ground.

Rey pulled the hood over her head, leaving the way she had come, going back alongside the school building until she came to the end of the courts, she peered up the top of the incline before heading onto it, going as quickly and as quietly as she could, still crouching low.

The sun was setting, the sky turning pale violet and pink, changing how things looked, casting new shadows to hide in, or to be watched from. All at once Rey heard another whistle, echoing from the north and one answered it to the west. The dorm and the garden areas, had they found others from her team or did it mean they’d found nothing? She wished she knew how many (if any) were left of her team, she only was certain about three being caught.

Rey reached the east side of the gym, giving her relative cover, she was just congratulating herself when a whistle came from much nearer, she turned to see figures running down from the back of the gym.  _ Bloody idjit! _ She thought at herself and started up the nearest drainpipe she could find. A stream of whistles sounded from her pursuers, and she assumed they were letting others know her position somehow.  _ Fuck nuggets. _

But there was no going back, so she went up, thinking furiously. But she was coming up blank, even if she found a free drain pipe to descend she’d be seen as she went down and they’d probably get there before she reached the bottom.  _ If only she had some rope. _ She growled in frustration. _ She was going to have to jump. _

She ran at full speed up towards the back of the gym, there was a drop of about ten feet onto a lower part of the building and she had noticed the ground at the back of the gym was softer, than elsewhere, probably due to the lack of sunlight. As she ran she heard a shout behind her, then one off to the west, feet started after her, she didn’t hesitate, she leaped of the roof onto the lower level, somewhere behind her Jess screamed and she felt a twinge of guilt. Rey absorbed the impact with a roll, tucking her left shoulder so she didn’t roll straight, and then tucked her head in so she rolled onto one side, jumping up almost immediately. 

Panicked cries arrived with feet and dark shapes peered over the edge, Rey grinned up at them so they knew she was okay, then ran forward and threw herself of the roof.

This fall was much further than the previous one and she tucked her legs in to her chest, leaning forward slightly; as she picked a good landing spot she extended her legs again to help absorb the impact. She landed on her forefeet with her knees slightly bent, then collapsed her legs and transitioned into a roll, once again tucking her shoulder and head so she rolled on to one side.

It had occurred in a number of seconds, but time had slowed for her, it quickly sped up again and she sprang off the ground, thankful to find she was only bruised and jolted and started running. There were relieved shouts behind her.

She turned to look behind her,  _ such a rookie mistake, _ and ran straight into Kylo Ren. He caught her in his arms, holding her tightly to him as she automatically struggled; it was no good, his grip on her was like iron, almost desperate.

He was breathless, his hold on her was more like a crushing embrace than a triumphal capture.

Running feet approached and he pushed her back from his chest but kept hold of her, his eyes burning in a face more pale than usual. 

“ _ Are fucking mad? What the hell were you thinking? _ ” Kylo’s voice was shaking as he spoke.

Rey frowned up at him but before she could answer Finn barreled into them, crushing her back against Kylo’s chest, hands fluttering over her, tears in his eyes, “ _ Never, ever do that again _ .” He said, voice rough.

Then everyone else started arriving, swearing at her, touching her, amazed at her being alive.

Eventually she fought them off, “Bloody ashes, I’ve jumped that far before, possibly further!”

Stunned silence met her, then Finn said quietly, “That may be so, but have you ever watched someone else do it?”

Rey frowned, “Of course I have, how would I have learnt otherwise?”

“How are you even still alive?” Ismasta said incredulously. 

Rey shrugged, guilt gnawing at her despite her thinking what she had done wasn’t that bad.

Finn took her firmly by the shoulders, “Do not, ever, EVER, do that again, Peanut.”

There were noises of general agreement. 

Rey didn’t answer, she may have to one day, so she wouldn’t lie to them, she changed the subject, “Who else have you got to catch?”

“You were the last.” Finn answered as the group started to break up. Rey grinned jubilantly but it slipped when she saw Finn wiping his eyes on his sleeves. Having friends was turning out to be rather more complicated than she had expected.

She took his arm gently, “Shall we go get dinner?” She asked and he gave her a small smile and nod.

Jess took her other arm as they walked to the refectory, “And after dinner, we are having showers then we are making you over, then fire pit!” Jess grinned at Rey’s resigned face, “You have a brush with death almost everyday and yet the idea of a makeover freaks you out? Rey, you are all kinds of special.”

Rey got the feeling Jess was not using the word special as Rey knew it.   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Autonomee is my Beta <3


	26. Aftermath: Berserkr

 

 

Kylo didn’t follow the others to the refectory, the fear and anger inside him were coalescing into something that needed release, if he didn’t do something soon it would consume him.

Everytime he blinked he saw her flinging herself off the gym roof, she was utterly fearless, and utterly mad.  _ She was going to be the death of him. _

Ingalan took one look at him, then was wordlessly pulling him along the path and to the gym, Zainmar pushing him from behind.

They dragged him inside, to one of the ground floor studios that had weights and running machines, and positioned him in front of a punch bag, putting gloves on his hands. Kylo didn’t move, he was trembling, inside him a black whirlwind screeched wordlessly.

Ingalan stood to the side of the punch bag facing him, “Punch it, Kylo,  _ now _ .”

With a primal roar Kylo attacked the bag, Ingalan skipping away to give him room.

Kylo was unaware of the other Knights leaving him, of Ingalan watching from a distance. By rights the afternoon’s activities should have tempered the anger, the violence that always lived inside him; that was one of the reasons he trained so much, but seeing  _ that _ , seeing  _ her  _ do _ that _ … He let loose another roar, and felt the skin on his knuckles split, he revelled in the pain. He needed more, but in this state he knew he would seriously hurt anyone who dared to fight him.

Years ago, when the Knights had met and formed their bond, they had stopped him from self-harming, it had been a release he’d needed, but they had helped him find another, helped him channel the monster inside, the monster his parents had never understood.

In their early teens they had sworn a blood oath to one another; they were his brothers. Without them he was nothing. Nothing but a black, yawning hole.

The Knights grounded him, they were his anchor in the madness, his safety net, the balance he needed.

And then  _ she _ had come into his life. A scruffy, scrappy little  _ nobody.  _ Full of defiance, seemingly devoid of fear. And in barely any time, his carefully constructed walls were cracked and crumbling. His mind fractured by a confusing medley of emotions that he wasn’t equipped to deal with.

_ What was happening to him? Why did he already love her so much?  _

He suddenly stopped mid punch, so blown away by that last thought,  _ he couldn’t be! Could he? _

Ingalan thrust a bottle of water at him and he drank without thought, mind blank with shock.

“Are you back?” Ingalan asked quietly, and Kylo blinked then focused on his friend’s face.

“Just… Thanks.” Kylo said, he realised he was drenched in sweat and wondered how long he had been at it.

“Think you can hold it together to go get food?” Ingalan asked, there was no judgement in his voice, there never was.

Kylo nodded, “Yeah, but I think I need a shower first... You go, I’ll eat when I’m done.”

Ingalan shook his head, “Nah, I’ll hit the showers too, I need one anyway and would be having one after dinner otherwise.”

Kylo nodded gratefully. Communicating with his eyes all the things he couldn’t put into words. They left the gym, walking through the twilight to the dorm.

People scurried out of their way, faces nervous, but Kylo barely saw them.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Yes, I know it’s awfully short, but I felt like this part needed to be on it’s own.
> 
> Berserkr masculine (genitive berserks, plural berserkir) (Old Norse)  
> ~ Scandinavian warrior  
> ~a raging warrior of superhuman strength  
> ~a wild Norse warrior who fights with frenzy


	27. Eyes On Fire

 

Jess was banging on Rey’s door about a minute after she had gotten out of the shower. Rey answered wrapped in a towel, eyes wide and cheeks burning.

“Are you almost ready?” Jess said, loudly almost bouncing in her excitement.

Rey gestured to the towel, “Not quite.” Rey answered a little drily. 

Jess moved as if to come in but Rey closed the door a little, “I will get dressed  _ on my own  _ and will come down to your room. I’ll just be a few minutes, I promise.”

Jess pouted at her, “Fine. But if you aren’t down soon we will come back up and drag you down.”

Rey snorted and shut the door, but she did dress hurriedly, not entirely sure Jess wouldn’t carry out her threat.

Before going down, she grabbed her favourite perfume,  _ Nightbloomer  _ from the bathroom and took it with her. 

The dorm room Jess shared with Maritan and Kenjad was on the second floor, their door had a skull and crossbones picture on it, beneath it was written in flowing script, ‘ _ The Blue Three Only’.  _ Rey wasn’t sure of it’s meaning and hadn’t been brave enough to ask yet. 

She had barely raised her fist to the door when it burst open and Kenjad yanked her in before quickly shutting the door again.

Rey was bemused by their high spirits but settled down as patiently as she could while they flew around her. If she stayed still and quiet, the quicker they’d be done… hopefully anyway.

Maritan was doing something to her hair with a hot stick while Jess pulled clothes out of their huge shared wardrobe, making a pile of yeses’ and nos’.

Kenjad was holding up small pots of make up against Rey’s face, muttering to herself. Rey stayed silent, listening to the music some speakers were playing, focusing on the bass that beat like her heart. 

The three girls all looked like they were ready to go, they looked so polished and flawless. Kenjad was in black shorts and patterned tights, with polished expensive looking black lace up boots, her top was purple in a silky fabric cut in a low v down the front and back, a silver crystal pendant dangled in her cleavage, her dark braids were up in a high ponytail, and there were large earrings that matched her pendant. Her lips matched the top, striking against her dark skin.

Maritan was wearing an emerald green long sleeved top with a scoop neckline teamed with a beaten gold collar, her blue jeans were tucked into cowboy boots and her blonde hair was caught up at the nape of her neck, spilling down her back in artful curls. Her lips were a subtle nude pink, her neutral eyeshadow covered lids lined in black.

Jess was wearing a dark red top, it had a high neck and left her slim shoulders bare, it was paired with stylishly ripped black jeans, and wedge ankle boots. Her hair was up, with a red rose nestled in the perfect yet messy design. Her lips matched her top and her eyes were smoky, black crystals dangled from her ears.

Sitting there looking at them Rey truly felt like the scruffy scavenger she was.

“Rey?”

Rey blinked and looked at Jess, “Sorry, what did you say?” She asked, embarrassed she’d zoned out a bit.

Jess clicked her tongue, “I said what kind of bra are you wearing?”

Reyshifted on the stool, almost having her ear burnt as a result. “I’m not, I only have one and that’s a sports bra.”

There were three shocked gasps… “Hold on.. Wait, what’s holding you up?” Kenjad asked as Maritan quickly removed the tong she was using from Rey’s hair to stare at her.

“An elastic crop top.” Rey said cheeks red. 

Kenjad sat down abruptly as if it was either that or fall over. “Girl. Oh stars. Okay, hmm you look like one of Maritans may fit you. Okay if I look through your draw Mari?”

“Go ahead.” Maritan said as she started on Rey’s hair again, “I’m almost done.”

Jess and Kenjad bowed their heads together muttering as they pulled out one bra after another,  _ why did someone need that many bras? _ It was a mystery to Rey.

Maritan finished with a flourish and made a satisfied noise then went to put the tongs away.

“Okay Rey, can you try this one on? Just face the wall, it’ll be fine.”

Rey pursed her lips at that but got on with. As she removed her t-shirt Jess suddenly said, “What the fuck is that on your back?”

Rey froze, closing her eyes, in her haste to change as quickly as she could... She had forgotten her brand.

She jumped and held her t-shirt against her front as someone's fingers ghosted over the burn mark given to her long ago to show she was owned by Unkar Plutt.

Jess turned her around gently, “Rey-  _ what is that? _ ”

Rey swallowed, looking at her feet, “In Jakku… Orphans are bought and  _ owned _ …”

She couldn’t look up, couldn’t bare to see the horror or disgust or contempt in their eyes. A dark hand lifted her chin up, and all she saw was sorrow, compassion and anger. A tear rolled down Maritan’s cheek and she started waving her hands as if to try and blow it away.

“We didn’t know.” Kenjad whispered. 

“I thought you changed in the cubicle because of all your scars.” Jess added.

Rey gave them a small, watery smile, “Partly, but mostly the brand.”

They crowded around her in a group hug, she stayed tense but they didn’t seem to be offended by it.

They stayed like that for a few moments before Jess said briskly, “Well, no low back or backless tops then. You get that bra on, Rey.” And they broke apart.

The bra was black satin and fit more or less, Jess frowned but said it would have to do and reiterated the necessity of a shopping trip soon.

In the end Rey didn’t recognise herself in the mirror. They’d dressed her in a pair of high waisted skin tight jeans that had been coated in something to make them look like leather, she wore them tucked in to her big black boots. The top she wore was a dark blue, the colour of twilight and had a subtle shimmer to it, it was made of a softly draping material with a low cowl neck. Maritan had added a silver crescent moon pendant that now dangled in the cleavage Rey kept being surprised by.

Kenjad had kept Rey’s makeup relatively simple with a subtle nude shimmer on her eyelids, a little black in the crease, swooping eyeliner and thick lashes. Rey had refused lipstick but Jess had pressed her into being allowing some lip stain, making her lips look darker and more plump, but it a natural way. 

Rey’s hair was down, in tousled loose curls, she normally hated her hair down but at least like this she could hide behind it if she wanted.

Kenjad added some shimmering powder lightly to Rey’s cheek bones and they announced her done.

They were all delightled when Rey showed them the bottle of  _ Nightbloomer  _ and Maritan insisted on applying to Rey herself.

They stood back, looking at her as if they had been digging in the sand and had found gold instead of scrap.

“Shit!” Kenjad said looking at a clock on the wall, “We need to go! Rey do you want to borrow a jacket too?”

Rey held up Finn’s hoodie but let it drop again when she saw their expressions, “Um, yes?” She answered. 

They left in a whirl of giggles and clattered down stairs, Rey felt as if there were moths flying around in her chest cavity.

Maritan squeezed her hand. “Don’t look so scared! Jess said you jumped off the gym roof earlier,” She said disbelievingly, “So this should be no problem for you.”

“Jumping of roofs is easy,” Rey muttered under her breath, Jess heard her and gave her an amused look. “And something you will never do again, right?”

Rey rolled her eyes. At least it would be dark outside. It wasn’t downstairs. 

Everybody stared at them. Rey kept telling herself it was at the other girls, but it didn’t help her feel any less exposed. She swung her hair forward over her face a little.

“Fuck me! Peanut,  _ is that you _ ?” Rey glanced up and found Finn walking towards her. He pulled her in for a quick hug then held her at arm's length, “Damn girl.. I mean. Damn.”

Rey frowned, unsure what that meant. Suddenly she wanted desperately to  _ not be there, _ Poe’s friends were all gathered round, seemingly inspecting her like chattel. 

Of course, Finn being Finn read her body language and slipped his arm through hers, “Shall we head out then, Peanut?” She nodded gratefully and they started out, Poe falling into step with them and the others following behind.

All Rey could think of was they could not reach the night outside quick enough.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was just about to enter the lobby from the games room when Rey and her friends came down the stairs. For a moment he hadn’t realised the girl he had been staring at was her. But it was.

His mouth was suddenly dry and his pulse seemed to beat a tattoo in his neck, even though she was obviously uncomfortable, she was stunning, even with those big scruffy boots incongruously paired with the rest of her outfit. There was a vulnerable quality to her, one that was usually hidden beneath her scruffy boys clothing and unadorned face; even when swimming she had never seemed so… delicate as she did now. 

Zainmar gave a low whistle behind him and he jumped, a little flush staining his cheeks. 

“Holy shit, was that the Scavenger?” They all turned in surprise to look at Javiell, who rarely registered these sorts of things.

“I believe it was.” Ingalan answered amusedly. Javiell just shrugged at them.

“She definitely scrubs up well.” Leonmar added.

“Kylo? Are we going to stand here for the rest of the night?”

Kylo blinked then gave Zainmar a mild glare. “No... Let’s go get the beer.” He said, making for the stairs as Rey and Finn left through the kitchen.

He needed to get his head on straight, he had been so sure that he’d be able to make a move on her tonight, but now his confidence was wavering.

Hopefully the beer would help... Hopefully Ismasta or some other douche canoe wouldn’t get there first.

He tightened his hands into fists, then slowly relaxed them as he let out a breath, and cleared his throat awkwardly. “Do I look alright?” He asked Ingalan quietly, as the other three went into Javiell’s room to get the beer. 

The corners of Ingalan’s mouth twitched but he looked Kylo over seriously; obviously Kylo was dressed in black, they all were- it marked them as a team, as brothers. But it didn’t give him the self assuredness it normally did.

Kylo wore his semi fitted jeans slung low on his hips, a fitted long sleeved black t shirt that showed off his muscular shoulders and chest, it’s sleeves had a black circuit board pattern on them, subtle but there, his hair was clean and shiny, artfully messy, and he had a leather biker jacket under his arm.

“You look fine,” Ingalan said once he’d looked him over, “Are you wearing after aftershave?” Kylo shook his head, “We’ll be round a fire, the smoke would mask it, there didn’t seem any point.”

“If she gets close enough to your skin she will be able to. Go put some on now.”

Kylo huffed but went and did so anyway, he chose  _ Bottled Night _ \- it seemed appropriate. 

Then they were moving down the stairs as casually as they could with bottles of beer concealed about their persons.

Mara gave them a wry smile from behind her desk in the lobby but didn’t challenge them. They waited till they were into the trees before pausing to uncap a beer each.

It turned out to be Trooper, not too dark and not too light, perfect for a night by a fire. Kylo drank half his bottle before moving on.

Most people had arrived already, the fire was going strong, two prefects watching it closely. There was a long standing agreement that so long as the prefects received donations of whatever you were drinking they’d ignore it and just tend the fire.

Unfortunately It was Hux and Waykamr. As if things weren’t complicated enough already.

Kylo grimaced and took another swig of beer. They’d have to give some to the prefects,  _ bloody and bloody ashes, why’d it have to be Hux? _

As they stood outside the ring of firelight, Kylo noticed Hux’s attention was firmly fixed somewhere other than the fire, he turned, curious as to what would have taken the self aggrandising cretin’s attention away from the fire.

_ But of course,  _ Hux was watching Rey. Kylo took another angry pull at his beer bottle and felt a firm hand on his shoulder.

“Stop glaring at Hux and go and talk to the Scavenger.” Ingalan said softly, “If you like we can go together, then I get to talk to Jess.”

Kylo sighed and consciously relaxed his shoulders. It was probably now or never. “Okay.” 

“Don’t overthink it. She’s just a girl, not a Nexu.” Ingalan said as he gave him a small shove to get Kylo started.

“To be honest, I’d happily take a Nexu on right now.” Kylo muttered to himself as they walked past the fire, wordlessly handing a beer over to Waykamr as they went by.

He straightened; Ingalan was right,  _ he was being stupid. _

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey shivered as they walked away from the dorm building and Finn pulled her tightly against him.

She glanced back to see they had moved away from Poe and asked quietly, “So. Are you and Poe going to get together this evening?”

Finn gave a squeak and made hushing motions at her, “Not so loud! …Do you think I should? Are you sure he likes me?”

Rey gave him a dry look, “Finn,  _ if I _ can see he likes you, then you really ought to, too. Either way you should do it.”

He showed his dimples, “Okay, maybe. I think I need a drink first though. Want to share mine with me?”

Rey shook her head, “I won’t, thank you though.”

Finn looked surprised, “Are you sure? Though I’ll admit it’s just cheap cider.”

“No, thanks... I don’t really drink alcohol.” Rey replied, absently.

“What never? Like, none at all?” Finn asked.

Rey shrugged, “Well, Plutt used to give us Skee if we’d been injured, took the edge off when we were sewn up or had bones reset but it burned like fire and always made me want to vomit.”

“There are so many things that disturb me about that sentence,” Finn said, “But, what is Skee?”

Rey shrugged again, “I never paid attention to how it was made, it was brown and had bits in it and tasted like arse but it worked quickly and was cheap to make.”

Finn shook his head, “I feel like we should find you something you’ll like - I think Jess has some Sidekick that tastes like strawberries and cream. You liked the strawberries at lunch the other day.”

Rey wavered but shook her head again. “That’s okay, I don’t think I’d feel comfortable if I was drinking.”

Finn snorted, “Peanut, that is  _ why _ people drink. They drink so they don’t feel awkward or tense or nervous… and you currently look like all those things.”

Rey smiled in spite of herself, “That is an interesting point.” Then she laughed at Finn’s smug expression.

“Jess!” Finn called back and Jess trotted up, sliding an arm through Reys. 

“You called?”

“So, Rey hasn’t ever had nice alcohol, could she try your Sidekick?” Finn asked, ignoring Rey’s glare.

“Oh my stars, you have to try this Rey! It’s amazing!” Jess handed Rey a tall slim bottle filled with suspiciously pink liquid.

Rey looked doubtfully back at Jess, “Is it meant to be that… bright?”

Jess laughed, “Trust me, just try it.”

Rey huffed out a sigh of defeat and took a small sip from the bottle.  It was surprisingly creamy and sweet, followed by a warm glow hitting her throat as she swallowed it. It was the polar opposite of Skee.

She put the lid back on carefully and handed it back to Jess. “You were right, that was nice.”

“So have some more then?” Finn said and Jess nodded emphatically.

“Maybe in a bit,” Rey said as they came into the clearing where the fire pit was. 

It was full dark now, but the large fire cast a warm circle of light in the depression it was situated in. 

Someone had dragged more logs out for seating and quite a few people were there already, sitting or standing, drinking and laughing with each other.

As they entered the circle of light people looked up to watch them, Rey felt like a rabbit caught in headlights, Finn pulling her along after him.

“Come stand by the fire for a bit, you’re still shivering, Peanut.” He said as he slid past people, Rey following behind.

“Ah, shit biscuits.” Finn muttered as they reached the fire. Rey looked up to see Hux, standing by the fire, along with one of his minions.

Hux’s eyes swept over them and moved on then snapped back to look at Rey, his mouth tightened slightly but then he looked away again and didn’t look back.

Finn pulled her to the opposite side of the fire to Hux and sat her down on a log. The fire was deliciously hot and Rey smiled unconsciously as she looked into the flames, feeling the heat settle on her skin.

“At least Hux is on Prefect duty, he won’t be able to be too much of a dick that way.” Finn muttered to her under his breath then opened his bottle of cider and drank.

Poe sat down next to them and gently pulled Rey’s shoulders back, “If you get any closer Rey you’ll be on fire and I don’t think Jess would be happy about her clothes going up in flames.”

Rey smiled, “I was fine. It’s just nice to feel some proper heat.”

She looked closely at Poe and Finn then stood up, “I think I’ll find Jess.” She said casually, “You two stay where it’s warm, I’ll be back in a sec.” It was a lie, but they took it.

Rey smirked in satisfaction as she walked away.

It slipped away into awkwardness as she manoeuvred her way to where Jess, Kenjad and Maritan were standing.

They seemed to be surrounded by boys, Rey stood on the edge of the laughing group, not wanting to barge her way through.

“Rey!” Kenjad called excitedly, “Out the way boys!” She said and she danced over and pulled Rey back into the circle, the opening closing behind them.

Rey’s stupid brain yelled, _ It’s a trap! _ But it was too late now, she was in. Jess grabbed her hand, eyes shining, cheeks flushed, Rey noticed the contents of the bottle of pink had significantly diminished. 

“This is Rey, she’s single too!” Jess announced happily and Rey was certain she would either die of embarrassment or kill Jess, or maybe even both.

“Oh, just kill me now,” She muttered to herself, cheeks flaming. Maritan slipped a bottle into her hand with an apologetic smile, “Sorry, Jess gets quite carried away sometimes. This will take the edge off, do you like almonds?”

Rey frowned, “I don’t think I’ve ever had one?”

“Well try this anyway.” Maritan said firmly. Rey looked up briefly at all the people, thought of Finn’s words and decided if she was going to survive this without resorting to running away or violence, having a drink may be a good idea.

The rectangle shaped bottle was cool in her hands as she took an experimental sip, it was sweet, with a tiny bitterness to it that gave it balance. It was unlike anything she had had before. She took another larger sip, it gave her stomach a warm glow inside. She took one more and handed it back smiling. “That’s really nice, weird, but nice.”

Maritan grinned, “Have some more!” But Rey shook her head, she wanted to take the edge off, not get shitfaced.

“Thanks, but I’m okay for now.” Rey said then turned to look to her right frowning, and looked straight into Kylo Ren’s dark eyes.

She lowered her eyes- his gaze was too intense to be held for long, but she was caught by his lips; they were moist from whatever he was drinking… An errant thought wondered what it would be like to bite them.

_ What the hell? Where had that come from? _

She flushed and watched his lips quirk in a small smile, making her look back up at his eyes. The intensity had waned with the quirk of his lips, changing into something softer.

Something flipped in Rey’s stomach, and she remembered his words to her after they had played Pirates, she shivered, not with the cold, but then someone jostled her and she looked away.

“You look really beautiful, Rey.” It was Ismasta, he had clearly drunk quite a bit, Rey shrank back slightly from the alcohol on his breath, uncomfortable with his hands on her waist. 

“Err, thanks?” she answered, wondering how she got out of his hold without being insulting- he was Poe’s friend after all.

“Oh Rey! You got to try this!” Kenjad bounced over, “Move aside ‘Masta I need Rey-Rey to try this!”

_ Rey-Rey? _ She wasn’t sure how to feel about that but she was grateful for the interruption, so she took the bottle without paying much attention to what it was and took a sip.

Whatever it was it was strong, sweet and spicy. 

“Mmmm,” She said at Kenjad’s questioning look. “I think I like this one best.” The dark girl grinned smugly.

“Well that’s because it, and I are awesome! It’s my favourite too. Ooo! We could make this into a game! You could try everyone’s drink!”

Rey giggled, surprising herself;  _ she was not a giggler. _ “Maybe another time?” Or more accurately, never.

Kenjad pouted, “But you haven’t tried beer yet! Or wine! Or cider!”

“Here try mine,” Ismasta thrust a bottle at Rey, standing very close to her.

Rey looked doubtfully at the bottle, she really didn’t want to try whatever it was, luckily Kenjad saved her, “No, ‘Masta, she doesn’t want  Jäger!” She said as if he was being particularly stupid and pulled Rey away from him, “She needs to try gin. Poe has some Sloe gin, we should find him,” And she marched off, Rey swaying as she was tugged along after her.

When they were halfway towards the fire Rey stopped her, grinning “I don’t think we should interrupt them.”

Kenjad frowned then focused on Finn and Poe and smiled delightedly; Finn and Poe were locked in a kiss, still sitting by the fire, oblivious to everyone else save each other.

“Yeah, I think we should leave them to it.” Kendra said, then added, “It’s about bloody time.” Rey nodded in agreement. 

“Okay, well, change of plans, Leojova has some good red wine you should try,” And she started back, but Rey stopped her.

“I’ll follow in a bit, just going to stand by the fire for a moment, to warm up.” Rey said, needing some space for a bit.

“Okay, shall I stay with you?” Kenjad answered, looking mournful.

“No, no I’ll be fine. I’ll come find you in a bit.” Rey said and Kenjad gave her a grin and a nod and set off.

Rey let go a sigh she hadn’t known she was holding in, then jumped as someone spoke just behind her.

“Hi.” 

Rey turned, recognising the deep voice and couldn’t decide whether she wanted to run away or not.

His fingers brushed her wrist, as if he knew she was on the edge of flight, and the light touch settled her back on her feet.

“Are you okay after your… jump earlier?” He asked, it was said quietly but there was an angry quality behind it and she remembered how furious he’d been.

Rey really didn’t understand the fuss, “I’m fine… I don’t understand why it freaked everyone out so much.” She said honestly.

His lips thinned somewhat and he took a breath. Opened his mouth then shut it as if he’d changed his mind about answering, then opened it again. “And we can’t understand why you thought we wouldn’t be freaked out by it.”

Rey wondered what he had been going to say first. She shrugged, “Seriously, I’ve jumped from that high loads of times, maybe higher. And I’m fine.”

“You must be made of rubber,” Kylo muttered before taking a mouthful of beer.

Rey laughed, surprising them both and he gave her a faint smile. He had a nice smile, it meant more because he did it less than other people.

_ I think I may be drunk  _ she thought, unsure what to do about it, frowning at Kylo’s big black boots.

A hand lifted her chin and suddenly he was much closer than before, though it didn’t feel intrusive as it had when Ismasta did it.

She couldn’t look away, his eyes seemed to be on fire, “I would very much like to kiss you.”

Rey let free a little gasp, it was less about what he said and more about how she realised she’d like him to.

But he didn’t and she frowned, then realised he was waiting for her to say something, “Okay.”  _ Okay? She sounded like a fucking moron! _

But then her mind went blank as he closed the space between them.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Autonomee is my Beta <3 
> 
> I now have "This Kiss" Faith Hill in my head… also i know, I’m mean to end it there, but next chapter tomorrow! <3  
> Chapter title is taken from the song of the same name by Blue Foundation  
> Kylo is wearing Hugo Boss, Bottled Night. Rey is still wearing Armani Code, I changed the name to Nightbloomer. The Beer the Knights are drinking is the official Iron Maiden beer and it is honestly called Trooper.  
> Also I have an ever growing Reylo playlist on spotify, the links on my profile (the address is anyway, I am retarded and can’t work out how to do links on AO3).


	28. Sparks, Fly Out

 

 

As Kylo’s lips touched hers, Rey closed her eyes. His lips were as soft as they looked, the contact with her own made her whole body feel like it had been doused in ice cold water that had somehow caught fire. 

One of his hands rested on her waist, drawing her hips against him, the other hand grazed up her cheek to thread through her loose hair. 

Rey’s mind was going into sensory overload, she wasn’t used to this many points of contact, at least not without it including some sort of violence. 

She was aware of his breathing, of hers, she could feel his heart beating, jumping inside his chest against her palm.

He smelled of darkness, spicy and exotic underneath the wood smoke, and the cold night air, when she moved a hand up into his hair she was amazed by it’s silkiness, then was startled by a little moan that escaped his throat as she gently pulled some of it, she let go immediately, worried she had hurt him.

They pulled apart, staring at each other, wide hazel eyes locked with warm brown ones. He bought up his hand to caress her cheek again, she shivered at the light contact, it felt like sparks of electricity spreading out in a wave across her skin.

She hesitantly brought her left hand up to his face, surprised by the emotion it elicited in him, he took a sharp breath in, closing his eyes as she gently touched his right cheek, traced an invisible line upwards, passing over his eye to rest on his forehead, then smoothed her fingers on his eyebrow and back into his hair.

Suddenly he pulled her to him again, this time the kiss was fierce, his lips greedy, his hands holding her head and neck as he parted her lips with his tongue, and as his tongue touched hers heat bloomed inside her and she couldn’t keep back a moan.

The world seemed to fall away and they were in darkness, surrounded by millions of bright stars. She didn’t know where she ended and he began, it didn’t matter, she just never wanted it to end…

Someone wolf whistled close by bringing them back to earth abruptly,  _ too soon _ . As they broke apart, Kylo turned with a snarl, still holding her close to him, almost possessively. 

Whoever it had been had (wisely) made themselves scarce and Kylo turned back to her, suddenly nervous as if he thought she’d run from him now.

“Sorry.” He mumbled, eyes not quite meeting hers. It was the first time either of them had uttered a word since she’d said  _ ‘Okay.’ _

It broke the spell, but only a tiny bit and Rey smiled up at him, still a little breathless. “You, could kiss me again… If you would like to?” She couldn’t keep the question behind her lips, still a little unsure.

He looked at her properly then, and a slow almost sultry smile painted his lips, “I would.” He answered simply, but instead of going straight for her lips again, he took one of her hands in his and bought it up to his mouth, holding her eyes with his all the time, he kissed her the tender part of her wrist, her palm, then shockingly, he took one of her fingers into his mouth, sucking it softly, then gently pulled it out, grazing it slowly against his teeth.

By the time her finger was out of his mouth her breathing had picked up and as the pad left his lower lip she made a noise that was half gasp and half moan.

He smirked at her, as if he were well aware of the feelings his act had generated between her legs. 

Rey was at a loss, she felt like she should retaliate but didn’t know how… unless… She remembered her random thought about biting his lip.

So she reached up and pulled his head down to her, he came willingly and she kissed him, as gently as she could, then drew away from him slightly, taking his bottom lip in her teeth, softly but firmly. She sucked it a little, then left it go, satisfied by the groan he made.

He took a deep breath, “I guess, I deserved that.” He said, his voice rough.

She gave him a smug grin and moved away from him slightly but with a sound like a growl he pulled her back to him and kissed her, it was all fire and ice and she was lost in sensation again.

This time she let her hands caress his chest and back, marvelling at the firm planes and hard muscles he was made of, letting herself slip away from reality, merely existing in his arms.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

All Kylo was aware of was Rey’s body pressed against his, her mouth on his, her tongue against his. He wanted...  _ Stars!  _ There was so much he wanted of her... Wanted to do to her, wanted to do with her. His brain seemed to stop functioning properly, all he was, was sensations, touch, smell, sound, taste

She was wearing the same perfume as before, its scent just as enthralling as the first time he had smelled it on her. She tasted of something sweet, spicy, he wasn’t sure what but it was intoxicating, no,  _ she was intoxicating. _

The little noises she was making unconsciously, the breaths and little moans she didn’t seem aware she was making, set his blood on fire. 

Her skin was soft, delicate, like silk or satin or … it was just perfect... And the way her body moulded to his, the way she felt in his arms. _ How had no one ever kissed her before?  _

But he felt an enormous sense of satisfaction that no one had. That made her his,  _ all his… _

And in the empty space, where just they existed, he admitted to himself the truth, he loved her, he was in love with her, he hadn’t even known her a week, and yet the rightness of the thought made him feel as if he had always known her, as if he had just been waiting, as if part of him expected her, knew she would come into his life, and he knew that she must never leave it.

He longed to tell her but held back, he didn’t want to scare her away; she was half wild, untamed,  _ untouched,  _ apparently unused to physical contact..

That thought made him remember their night together and his body almost broke with how tight he was wound.

He had to break away, take a breath, she smiled up at him and his breath caught,  _ how was this possible?  _ He’d never been massively interested in girls previously, sure he’d ‘seen some action’- this was not his first kiss; but he’d never really  _ felt  _ anything for a girl before, it had always amused the other Knights no end, he had just assumed he wasn’t wired that way, and that had made sense, had been fine, until now.

She looked over her shoulder, apparently just remembering where they were, at least she wasn’t unaffected by what was between them, a tiny knot of worry he hadn’t known was there, relaxed in him.

His head snapped up as someone yelled, there were sounds of a tussle, he saw Javiell start to square off with someone,  _ shit _ ,  _ fucking _ Ismasta, _ that massive wank bandit. _

He looked down at her, he wanted nothing more than to stay, but Javiell was his  _ brother _ . “I need to go and break that up... will you.. I mean, can I come and find you again when it’s sorted?”

The look she gave him was at once understanding and sultry, “Yeah, I’d like that- I mean like it if I see you after, not that you have to break up the fight, I mean.” 

She let out a small nervous laugh.  _ Stars _ how could someone so crazy, so deadly,  _ so sexy,  _ also be cute? 

He grinned at her, pressed his lips to hers then strode off, feeling like a god.

When he got to the scene of the fight and pulled Javiell away from Ismasta it felt odd- their roles were normally reversed. 

A glance told him Leonmar was rather worse for wear, he had no idea where Zainmar was and Ingalan was making his way to them now. Kylo looked down at a bleeding Ismasta whom Poe was helping to his feet, throwing glares over his shoulder at them as he did.

Javiell was still struggling so Kylo dragged him out of the circle of firelight, Ingalan joined them seconds later.

Javiell was muttering to himself, clearly drunk., “I hate that shitty little fucker! He was talking shit about you Kylo, he was going to go over and break you and the Scavenger up, said you must have drugged her! He’s a fucking whingey twatbag!”

Kylo frowned, feeling anger coil inside him, but Ingalan put a warning hand on his arm, “As much as I’d like to see you break that git-wizards face, Kylo, remember he is friends with the Scavenger’s friends, and if you want to keep attaching yourself to her face, I’d recommend caution.”

Kylo took a deep breath in and released it, willing the beast inside him back to sleep, it was hard, but he would not, could not, lose her,  **not again…** _ Wait where had that thought come from? _

He frowned, then shook his head to clear it, “How about I take you back to the dorm, Jav?”

“No I’ll take him,” Said Zainmar as he sauntered up behind them. “What happened? Sorry, I was busy with, uh, Jorellie? No, Jorelis, that was it. You go back to your Scavenger, Kylo and you back to attempting to pull Jess, Ingalan.”

Kylo smirked at them, then turned looking down into the circle of light to locate Rey. His heart stopped.

Hux stood next to her, a hand on her arm, but oddly not in an aggressive way, almost as if he were comforting her, Kylo saw her expression change, it flickered from hostility to shock, to horror, to grief, her shoulders hunched, her whole body changed as if she were clutching a massive wound in her torso; Kylo was running, but he was too late.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Ay me! For aught that I could ever read,

Could ever hear by tale or history,

The course of true love never did run smooth.

 

~ A Midsummer Night's Dream, by William Shakespeare.

  
  
  


****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay, I know, I know, I am a bad person.  
> Autonomee is my Beta (she is not a bad person)
> 
> But, here is a link to a floor plan to the downstairs of Rey's dorm: https://imgur.com/hwHweNp
> 
> And a link for a very badly drawn map of the school grounds: https://imgur.com/0zwMM8p


	29. Two Birds, One Stone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt too guilty to wait till tomorrow to post this- I've just started chapter 30...

 

Rey watched Kylo walk away regretfully, then she mentally shook herself,  _ he would be back.  _ She smiled, absently touching her swollen lips; she had not been prepared, no one had ever told her a kiss could be….  _ Like that _ .

She was still breathing deeply, could still feel the flush on her skin, the fire inside her, and the overwhelming urge to be held by him again.

Rey stood on her own, not wanting to share this moment with anybody else; they would sully it and she wanted to examine every feeling she had on her own.

She was too wrapped up in herself to care much about the fight he had gone to stop, too wrapped up to pay attention to the people near her, so she jumped when a hand touched her shoulder lightly, she turned thinking it was Kylo, but her smile turned to distaste as she saw it was Hux.

Rey gave him a flat look and his mouth thinned, but he didn’t take his hand from her arm.

“I feel like I owe you, for the... Pool incident- even though it wasn’t my fault, still I feel like I owe you. So I am going to give you some information and then we will be even.”

Rey arched an eyebrow at him, “I don’t want to hear anything you have to say, Hux.”

“You will want to hear this. Kylo and his friends have a bet on whether he can dupe you into giving him your virginity… I saw him make his move just now. You can believe it or not as you wish, just consider what you  _ know of him _ , his reputation, which I am sure you must have heard about your first day here, I appreciate this coming from me is likely to damage its credibility, but that's not my problem... And now we’re even.”

Rey froze, felt everything inside her still, even her heart seemed to go silent, she stared at Hux, unable to get any words out. Her mind seemed to be fracturing into tiny needles of doubt, her natural mistrust rising up and confirming what he said.

_ Of course _ Kylo didn’t like her,  _ of course  _ he didn’t. She was  _ stupid _ , no matter what she was wearing she was  _ Scavenger Scum  _ and  _ always would be. _

Her chest hurt, she felt like a she’d been shot in the chest with a sawn off shotgun, something must have showed on her face because Hux said, “I’m sorry.” And he said it as if he meant it, which confirmed even more that he spoke the truth.

He dropped his arm and at that termination of contact her body took control, like any other time she was in danger, the fact that it was her feelings being hurt rather than her body didn’t matter, this was something she could not fight, so she went with flight.

She didn’t pause to say anything to Hux, it didn’t occur to her to try and find Finn or Jess. One moment she was standing there, breaking apart and another she wasn’t. She was in the dark, running as if her life depended on it, running from the tearing pain inside her, running as though if she were fast enough, she could outrun it, hide away and never feel again.

She ran until her lungs burned, her legs trembled and then she climbed the building nearest her, it didn’t matter which it was, she  _ needed  _ the stars,  _ needed _ their solace like never before. 

Once she was on the roof she found a small place by a skylight to lean against, scrubbing angrily at her eyes.  _ Tears are just a waste of salt; _ an old desert saying, one she took to heart. Tears made you weak, and showed your weakness to the world. Tears would not help her.

She raised her face to the sky, letting the starlight fall on her, trying to soak up their cold, white light.

She slipped into her cold place, the place inside she went when she had to fight, cut off from emotion, cut off from pain, cut off from earthly ties.

She was empty.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo ran, but as desperate as he was to catch Rey, she was more desperate to get away. He was in shock, how could things go from so perfect to so wrong in a matter of moments? He lost her in the darkness, so he ran to the gym and climbed the roof, hoping she would be there, she wasn’t, he climbed the dorm roof but she wasn’t there either.

It had taken a whole team of people to track her down in the light of day when they had played manhunt, what chance had he on his own, in the night?

And yet, he was angry with himself, he felt like he should know instinctively where she was, as if they shared a bond he could follow, but inside him was only silence.

So he went back to the firepit, in the hopes she had gone back or her friends may know where she was, but then he saw Hux, and the beast rose up in him and he was consumed by darkness.

Hux seemed to realise he was in trouble when he saw Kylo coming towards him, and he moved to keep the fire between them.

**_“What did you do?”_ ** Kylo snarled, barely words, barely human,  _ but Hux knew _ .

Hux tried to smirk but it was a little weak, “Me? I did nothing. Just said a few words to the Scavenger Scum, some words she needed to hear.”

Hux was trying to appear nonchalant, but was making frantic motions with his hands so his lackeys came to his aid, crowding round him protectively.

It didn’t matter, in his current state Kylo could destroy them all.  _ He would. _

He was coiled ready to spring when someone poked him in the back and said in an angry voice, “What the fuck did you do to Rey?”

Kylo turned with a growl to find Finn, clearly afraid yet more angry, glaring up at him accusingly.

“I said,  _ what did you do to Rey _ ?” He reiterated, though he took a small step back, body hunching slightly, defensively. 

Before he could raise his fist, Ingalan was there, swiftly followed by Leonmar apparently quickly sobering up and Zainmar, who for once wasn’t grinning.

All three of them could barely contain him. “What the shitting hell is going on?” Zainmar muttered as he held onto Kylo’s arm, having to twist it behind Kylo’s back to make any impact.

Finn didn’t help matters, he followed them as they dragged Kylo out of the ring of fire light, still demanding to know where Rey was and what he’d done to her, Poe was with him now, hard eyed, Ismasta too,  _ it was a fucking procession. _

“Seriously, not a good time guys, you need to give him space to come down from it.” Leonmar said through gritted teeth.

They frowned, they didn’t understand, it didn’t matter anyway, because  _ he didn’t know  _ what had happened.

**_“It was Hux!”_ ** Kylo snarled, muscles straining, cords in his neck standing out, he probably looked rabid, he didn’t care.

Ingalan stood in front of him, between Kylo and his accusers, “ _ You need to go, _ he isn’t… sane right now, you’ll only make it worse. If he says it was Hux, it was Hux, so go and ask that fucking slimey shit weasel what happened and leave us to sort Kylo out, or I won’t be held responsible for what happens,  _ if he gets loose. _ ”

That seemed to filter through their tiny minds at last and they retreated, glaring over their shoulders, yet walking quickly.  _ He despised them. _

Ingalan turned back to him, face tight with anger and concern. He gripped Kylo’s chin, trying to get him to focus on a familiar face.

“Kylo? Kylo! Oh fucking hell, Kylo! Listen to us!” Ingalan stopped shaking Kylo and chanted, the other Knights there joining him quietly, this was a last resort and seldom used.

_ “Blood to blood, blood calls blood, blood bonds us brothers, blood is, and blood was, and blood shall ever be, brothers we are one.” _

It was the stupid oath they had made with each other age thirteen, it sounded like something out of a bad horror movie…  _ And yet, _ it pulled at him, even here, more beast than boy, it found him, cast him a lifeline.

There was a flicker of relief on Ingalan’s face when Kylo looked at him again, but they didn’t let him go, he knew they wouldn’t for a while.

He shook his head, “ _ I need to find her! _ You have to let me go!”

“Kylo, you know we can’t do that, I’m sorry, but we  _ can’t.” _ Ingalan said gently.

Kylo huffed, an anguished frustrated sound. “Then  _ please _ ,  _ please _ can one of you go find out what the fuck happened? If anyone knows where she is?  _ Please? _ ”

Ingalan met the eyes of the others behind Kylo who were still holding him, then gave a slight nod. “Okay, I’ll go, but if Zainmar whistles for me, I will come back and we will take you away, okay? ” Ingalan waited for Kylo’s nod, then walked back into the light.

Each second seemed to slow, each one a fresh agony. In the end Kylo looked away, watching without being able to hear was torture and he could feel the beast trying to break free again.

“Easy, Kylo,” Zainmar crooned to him, regrounding him, “ _ Easy _ .”

When Ingalan came back, he was angrily muttering to himself under his breath. “It’s a complete shit show, no one knows where she went, Jess has been back to the dorm but her room is empty. Hux isn’t saying anything relevant and Ismasta is being a massive twat… You’ve said before that she goes out alone at night, Kylo, so she should be fine, Finn or Jess will get it out of her in the morning and we can sort it all out then, I’m sorry,  _ but that is it  _ for tonight. Now we are all leaving the pit, you need to walk this off and be as far away from other people as possible... Will you walk or must we drag you?”

Kylo shook his head, all the tension went out of his body as despair consumed him, he was at an utter loss and went easily as they guided him away from the light, into the darkness.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey started to hear birds sing and realised it must be just before dawn, she stood stiffly, still numb inside. In the dark she looked about her, her night vision allowing her to make out the hulking mass of the main school building to her left.

She could dimly see the drive that led off the grounds snaking away, so this must be the library. The road called to her,  _ what could stop her from just leaving? _ She could just pack her bag and go, then she would never have to see anyone else here, ever again, she could move on,  _ forget _ … But there would be no forgetting, it was stupid,  _ she was stupid _ , but that didn’t make it any less true.

And if she left, she would never see Finn again, though at least he had Poe now, he probably wouldn’t even miss her,  _ but she, _ she would miss him.

Suddenly he was all she wanted, despite knowing the questions he would ask her, questions she didn’t want to answer, but oh, to just see him, feel his warmth as he held her…

**NO!** Her mind skittered away, _ no _ . No more embraces, not from anyone,  _ anyone at all. _

It was time to go, she found her way down, unsure if it was the way she’d come up and made her way quickly back towards the dark dorm.

She let out a breath as she neared it- she had half been afraid someone would be waiting. She decided to go to the Workshop soon and see if she could purloin a lock to put on her bedroom door, she needed to redefine her boundaries. 

She climbed the drainpipe and lifted her window which she’d left ajar- she liked to always have an second exit or entry in case she needed it.

She peeled off the clothes she’d borrowed from the Blue Three girls and had a shower, letting it run over her face, washing any trace of… _ him _ , from her skin.

When she was dry and back in her room, she moved the chair from the desk to wedge against the door, then settled into her nest just as the sky turned pink, she frowned, got back up and shut the curtains, then settled down again, in her head she went back to Jakku, in a place where everyone hurt you, you at least knew what to expect, and she slowly drifted off to sleep.

  
  
  
  


 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry, the last few chapters have been a bit brutal… I am a bad person T_T
> 
> This chapter was brought to you by the songs-
> 
> Ohne Dich by Rammstein,
> 
> Exile by Soilwork,
> 
> All The King's Horses by Karmina
> 
> and Hurt by NIN.
> 
> The Knight’s oath is partly related to a prophecy in The Great Hunt by Robert Jordan.
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	30. Star Crossed

 

 

Rey awoke with a jolt and tried to sit up, but she was restrained, in some sort of chair, all her limbs were held down, there was what looked like two parts of a vice on either side of her head, but they weren’t shut and she found she could lift her neck to look around.

The chair was reclining at an angle in a futuristic looking room, and sitting down, opposite her, was the monster in a mask.  _ This is a dream. _

Even sitting he was huge, his mask making him inhuman. She pushed down her fear as best she could, “Where am I?” She asked, only a slight tremor in her voice.

There was a slight delay, without seeing his face she couldn’t discern his expression, then he said in that chilling, modulated tone, “You’re my guest.” There was almost a tinge of amusement.  

The bastard was laughing at her. But she kept her tongue civil, she asked “Where are the others?” She was afraid of his answer, but she needed to know.

“You mean the murderers, traitors and thieves you call friends? You’ll be relieved to hear I have no idea.” His answer lessened the fear in her mind a little, the idea of him having caught Finn or anyone else had been eating her up inside.  _ This is a dream. _

But it didn’t lessen the hatred she felt towards him, didn’t lessen her desire to rip him apart and stop him from ever harming anyone else again.

He cocked his head to the side slightly, “You still want to kill me.” 

It was not really a question, but she answered anyway, “That happens when you’re being hunted by a creature in a mask.” 

He didn’t answer her, but placed his hands on his mask and released the catch, standing up as he took it off.

What he revealed was shocking, beneath the mask, the monster had a youthful,  _ beautiful  _ face, framed by silky looking black hair. 

_Kylo Ren,_ her mind supplied, he is as beautiful as he is cruel… _And he kissed me, he tricked me…._ But not _here,_ not _this_ Kylo Ren _… What did that mean?_

Rey tried to keep the confusion off her face, then looked away from him, not wanting to see him anymore, she wished he had kept the mask on now. His face made her feel sick.  _ This is a dream. _

He dumped the mask into a curious shallow pit of ashes, as he came towards the chair she was in, she looked ahead of her, unwilling to look at his face directly, but her traitorous eyes flicked up a few times the closer he got to her, when he was only a foot away he spoke, unmodulated his voice was still deep but there were emotions behind it that were recognisable.  _ It was so familiar. _

“Tell me about the droid.”

Instead of pointlessly lying, Rey went for the truth, just not the truth he wanted, “He's a BB unit with a selenium drive and a thermal hyperscan vindicator --” But he interrupted her.

His gaze slid to the side of her,  “He's carrying a section of a navigational chart. We have the rest, recovered from archives of the Empire. We need the last piece. And somehow, you convinced the droid to show it to you.” He paused, distaste writ clear across his face, “You. A scavenger…”

And there it was, at least this Kylo Ren didn’t hide his disdain. Yet anger flashed through her at that word, he said it with such contempt… and there was a trace of disbelief too, as if even a droid should know better than to trust the likes of her, furious tears filled her eyes, but she didn’t let them fall. She did NOT cry...  _ How had he known though? ...This is a dream. _

He cast a quick considering look down her body then looked back at her face and said, “You know I can take whatever I want.” It was less a boast or a threat, more a certainty, those words chilled her to her core... Because she knew he could….

  
  
  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo and the Knights had walked for about an hour, the last forty five minutes they had released their hold on him and he had walked beside them. They walked mostly in silence, there were a few muttered conversations but he couldn’t bring himself to listen.

He was currently numb, a new emotional state for him. After their walk they hustled him into the dorm and up to their floor, then got their duvets from their beds and settled in his room so they could keep an eye on him; after all Ismasta was on the floor below, Hux on the one below that.

They passed some Firewhiskey about before settling down, Ingalan sleeping by the door, Zainmar the window and Leonmar by his bed. When they’d checked in on Javiell he was passed out in his room and they had left him to it.

Kylo couldn’t imagine he would sleep and yet he almost immediately felt oblivion rise up and suck him down into sleep… But it was not peaceful.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kylo did not like this dream but however hard he tried to wake up he could not. He was in an odd round room, in greys, blacks and reds, it looked like something out of a sci-fi movie. At least he had been able to take that ridiculous mask off even if the lack of it made him feel a little… naked. But he hadn’t been able to make sense of most of the words coming out of his mouth, and the chair Rey (the dream version of her from his previous dream) was restrained in looked horribly like a torture device.  _ This is a dream. _

But he kept going, it was as if he were a passenger here, or an actor saying the lines he had been given, unable to deviate from the script.

Then something he said, really chilled him, “You know I can take whatever I want.” And yet the words also filled him with a sick excitement, he finally had her, all to himself, unable to escape him. Kylo felt ill at that thought.

He moved even closer to her, apprehension shone in her eyes as he raised his hand and leaned  in, his hand almost touching the side of her head as she looked away from his face. _ This is a dream. _

He could feel her thoughts, her memories, breaking into her mind somehow, clearly hurting her because she started struggling against the restraints that held her, he could feel her mind desperately trying to push him out.   
He saw her life in Jakku, he didn’t know if it was accurate, if this was the same Jakku his Rey had come from, but it seemed to fit, the emptiness of her existence was utterly stark, devoid of comfort, of all the things he had taken for granted in his life.

“You're so lonely... so afraid to leave…” He almost crooned at her, smiling slightly, “At night, desperate to sleep... you imagine an ocean. I see it... I see the island…”

He watched, heart breaking, as tears streamed down her face, yet she still resisted. This felt like something akin to rape. He felt dirty.  _ This is a dream. _

“And Han Solo.” Kylo let out a shocked gasp inside his head at that name, it was impossible! His double carried on, “You feel like he's the father you never had. He would've disappointed you.”

Kylo felt a slight echo of agreement to that statement.

Even though she was clearly in agony, she was also getting angrier by the second, “Get out of my head.” She grated at him, voice commanding.   
He stepped away, arm outstretched once again as he faced her, “I know you've seen the map. It's in there... and now you'll give it to me.” He pulled, his mind straining against hers and felt…  _ something. _ A strange feeling that passes between them, like an energy they recognised in each other. A kinship…  _ This is a dream. _

Kylo’s face softened a tiny bit, “Don't be afraid. I feel it too.” 

As if him telling her not to be afraid worked, she leaned forward as far as she could, “I'm not giving you anything.” She spat defiantly.              
“We'll see.” He said, smirking, and he redoubled his assault on her mind, staring into her eyes, this time she did not look away.

Then it was all in their minds, him pushing and her pushing him back, Rey’s breathing was laboured now, the cords in her neck visible as she strained her whole being to fight him.

Kylo felt his other self start to lose his confidence,  _ it shouldn’t be difficult for him to do this, _ and then felt it drain away when he hit a solid barrier in her mind.  

Conversely, Rey appeared to get stronger, almost as if they could share this power and she had taken it from him, was using it against him.  _ This is a dream. _   
Then to his shock and the other Kylo’s horror, Rey smashed her way into his head.

She was leaning towards him as far as she could go, anger and a hint of victory on her face.         
“You... you're afraid... that you will never be as strong as Darth Vader!”

Shock shattered through the other Kylo, disbelief, humiliation.  _ How could she have defeated him? She was nothing! _

He snatched back his hand as if she had burnt it, and took a step away, trying to compose himself and failing utterly.  _ This is a dream. _

Rey let out a gasp, her mouth a soft O as she was released and sank back against the chair.

Kylo’s breath was ragged now, he whirled away from her, snatching the mask and left the room.         
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo woke with a horrified yell, and landed on top of Leonmar, who gave a muffled shout and wrestled him onto the floor.

He stayed there, panting, his heartbeat fast and his body sweat soaked and shivering. The other two knights were already on their feet, fumbling torch lamps on.

Leonmar sat up, put a hand on Kylo’s shoulder and he flinched. “Kylo? Are you with us?”

Kylo turned wild eyes on Leonmar, unable to speak but nodded his head jerkily. 

Ingalan draped a blanket over his bare shoulders and sat down on the floor with him, Zainmar copying him.

“Want to talk about it?” Ingalan asked.

Kylo shook his head. “No.” His voice sounded hoarse, “At least, not yet…” 

Leonmar passed him the half full Firewhiskey and he took a gulp, the burn helping him focus. He pulled the blanket tightly around his shoulders.  

Zainmar got up and pulled the curtains open, the sky was pink, a glance at the clock showed 6.45am.

Kylo felt like he hadn’t slept a wink, and had taken a beating to boot. He took another pull at the bottle, oddly, he suddenly wanted to see his father.

He shook his head at that thought, and at the dream, it had seemed so… real. His heart ached as he thought of Rey, he had left her in that chair, in that place.

And oh, the things he had seen in her mind, he shuddered and drank more.

“Was it a normal nightmare, or one like the last one?” Ingalan said after a while.    

Kylo hunched, then sighed,  “Like the last one, only, much, much worse. Especially after last night.”  

There was quiet for a moment, then Ingalan opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted as Javiell stumbled through the door, dark hair a mess and grey eyes bloodshot.

He stood looking at them, blinking owlishly, “Are you ladies having a sleepover or something? You do realised we have rooms next to each right?” His eyes alighted on the Firewhiskey in Kylo’s hand, “Fuck, what happened? Also whoever just shouted woke me up and I’m not entirely happy about it.”

Kylo wordlessly handed him the bottle, Javiell shrugged, “What the hell, I can’t feel any worse than I do now.” He drank and sat down. “Now what the fuck have I missed?”

Kylo stood, “Fill him in, if you want. I’m going to have a shower.” He got up to leave, and Zainmar stood smoothly too.

“Yeah, I could do with one too.” He said casually, but Kylo wasn’t fooled.

He just nodded though,  _ Hux was so near _ … He sighed and went and stood in the shower, as the water washed over his head, he realised with a pang that he was washing any trace of her off his body.   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

After Kylo Ren had left, Rey sank back onto the chair. She was sweating, what had just happened? Had she just beaten him at his own game? It seemed as if something inside her had awoken, something that had until now, lain dormant.  _ This is a dream. _

And Kylo Ren had set it free, how ironic.

But it still left her here, strapped to an instrument of torture, at the mercy of anyone who had access to this room.

There was a guard though… Perhaps, she should test her new powers? She focused her mind, took several breaths to try and calm herself then said, “You will remove these restraints, and leave this cell, with the door open.”

There was a pause, then a modulated voice asked, “What did you say?” Rey’s heart did a little stutter for a split second, but no, it was not Kylo Ren, everyone here seemed to wear masks.   
Rey’s voice was less steady the second time, but she had to try, “You will remove these restraints, and leave this cell, with the door open.”  _ This is a dream. _

She heard footsteps move towards her and a guard or soldier dressed in odd white… armour? Came to stand to her right, he was carrying a strange yet dangerous looking gun. Had what she done worked? No.

“I'll tighten those restraints, scavenger scum!” He said nastily.    
It was now or never, Rey pushed everything out of her mind, except what she wanted him to do, she focused in on him with her eyes and her mind, face now calm.  _ He would do what she wanted of him. _   
She felt her face smooth as she said, for the last time, “You will remove these restraints, and leave this cell, with the door open.”

There was a subtle shift somewhere between her mind and his, and he straightened, and to her immense relief said, “I will remove these restraints, and leave this cell, with the door open.”

Rey clamped down on her excitement, she must be calm.  _ This is a dream. _

The guard undid her restraints, then turned and started marching out, she heard a beep and what sounded like a automatic door opening.

Another thought came to her and she quickly added, “And you will drop your weapon!”

She couldn't believe her luck when he answered, “And I'll drop my weapon.” And a clattering sound immediately followed it.  _ This is a dream. _

Rey was dizzy with shock and disbelief. She got up and cautiously moved to the doorway, as she went through it, everything went dark.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey awoke with a gasp, face sticky with tears and sweat. Another one of those dreams, at least she knew what they meant now, it must have been her subconscious warning her about Kylo Ren all along.

Deep down she must have known her attraction to him was dangerous. She shuddered as she remembered his words from the dream.  _ ‘You know I can take whatever I want.’ _

Maybe there he could, but that wasn’t real. Here and now, no one could take anything from her, people had tried before, and they had failed, Kylo Ren was no flesh merchant, no gangster, no mercenary. No, he was just a boy, he was nothing.

The clock told her it was 9.30am, very late for her. As she left her nest she shivered and decided to be decadent and take another shower, erasing the tears and fear her dream had left her with.

Once she was dried she dressed in her normal scruffy clothes, putting them on was like donning armour, she pulled her hair back and up into her prefered three bun style but set them higher than normal, making an almost faux hawk. 

Before she left, she pulled up her top, took her knife and cut a score along her left side, not deeply but enough that there would be a scar. It joined a line of others, each one representing a hard lesson she had learnt, and would never forget.

She wiped the blood off her knife and skin, then found a plaster in the bathroom and slapped it on.

She paused, looking at the knife, then slipped the sheath into the waist of her jeans at the back. Of course she wouldn’t use it, but strapping it on made her feel safer all the same.

She decided to leave the dorm through the window rather than go downstairs, at some point she would have to get her other clothes from Jess, but that could wait, she was hungry and breakfast would be over soon.

There weren’t any people around outside, it was cold and a chill wind bit at her fingers as she made her descent.

Once down she walked briskly till she got to the refectory, glancing through the door showed her there was no one she really knew and she went in, getting tea and bread. She didn’t want any of the foods that had so excited her yesterday. 

She took her breakfast and sat in a corner, her back to the wall so she could keep an eye on any comings and goings.

As she ate, she planned. She knew she wouldn’t be able to avoid Kylo Ren forever, but she would allow herself one day of avoiding him and the other Knights.

At least he wasn’t in her year so she only had him in MMA class, she wondered about asking Luke to change to something else, but she decided against it, she’d liked the class too much, and Luke would be there so it wouldn’t be possible for Kylo Ren to bother her too much.

She sighed as she finished her tea, then saw Kalhale and Leojova come in and get breakfast. She finished her tea and went over to them on her way out,

“Hi, err do you guys know where Finn is?” She asked, they jumped slightly, then looked surprised to see her.

“Rey!” Leojova said then looked confused, “Wait, how did you get here? Finn’s been waiting down stairs for you for several hours. He sent Jess up a few times but she couldn't get into your room, are you okay?”  

Rey felt a little guilty over Finn and Jess but mentally shrugged it off, “Yeah, I’m fine.” She said casually and they raised their eyebrows. “Do you guys know where Kylo Ren is?” She didn’t even stutter.

“I think he’s in the gym,” Kalhale said slowly, “Though he might be done now, in which case he’s probably in the games room.”

“Okay, thank you.” She gave them a little sort of wave and walked away quickly, hopefully she’d make it to Finn without any complications.

Happily Finn was sitting with Poe in the common area, without any sign of the Knights. He had his back to the door, facing the entrance to the kitchen.

“Hey,” She said quietly behind him and he jerked in surprise, then flew out of his seat and wrapped his arms around her, she pushed him away, though gently.

“Peanut! Where have you been? Wait how did you get down here?” He said, worry in his voice.

Rey shrugged but gave him a smile, “I just had breakfast, Kalhale told me you were waiting here. Sorry.”

“But what happened? What’s going on? You freaked everyone out last night and Kylo Ren completely lost his shit. Ismasta went loopy too and insisted Kylo had  _ drugged your drink. _ ”

Rey snorted at that. “That is ridiculous, I didn’t even have my own drink, I had a few sips of other peoples. Have you had breakfast?”

“Poe brought me some over, but I could eat again.” He said frowning,

“Okay, how about we go get you a second breakfast and we can talk there?”  Rey asked, she wanted very much not to be in the dorm any longer than necessary.

Finn looked at Poe, who was studying Rey carefully, “Finn, why don’t you two go hang together and I’ll see you in a bit?”

Rey was secretly relieved, she wouldn’t have asked Finn to leave Poe behind, but she had secretly wanted it to just be she and Finn for a bit.

Finn nodded then gave Poe a really sweet smile before kissing him softly and grabbing his hoodie. 

Rey flashed a grin at Poe as they left and he gave her a wink and a happy smile.

“So,” She said as they left the dorm, “You and Poe, huh?”

Finn grinned at her, showing all his teeth, “I know, oh stars Peanut, I can’t believe it.. Wait, hold on, no, nice try but we are going to talk about you.  _ What happened last night? _ I got conflicting stories from everyone who was there, none of them made much sense at all.”

She huffed a resigned sigh, “I just needed some space suddenly, so I went off and sat on the library roof… when you first came here, to Canto Bight I mean, did you never feel like everyone was just too much and you needed space away from them?”

He nodded but frowned at her, “But that still doesn’t explain what happened before that, also how the hell did you get to the refectory without me seeing?”

Rey shot him a smug look, “I climbed down the drain pipe… I didn’t want to bump into loads of people who would pepper me with questions, sorry Finn.”

He nodded, “Okay, I can get that, though I’m really not happy with you climbing roofs and drain pipes, Peanut...  _ But what happend? _ ”

They had just entered the refectory and Finn started piling a plate with food before it could be taken away, Rey picked up a bowl of fruit and they sat down.

“Some people said you kissed Kylo.” Finn said before he took a mouthful of pancake.

Rey felt her cheeks flush, part embarrassment, part anger. “Yes. I kissed Kylo Ren. It was a stupid thing to do and I won’t be repeating it.”

Finn’s eyebrows formed a deep V, “I can’t say I disagree with that, but what did he do to make you regret it.”

Rey hesitated, and Finn put down his knife and fork to take her hand, she suppressed the urge to draw it back.

“Peanut,  _ Rey, you can tell me. _ ”

Rey let out a defeated sigh, “Okay, but I will tell you only if you promise not to tell anyone else.” Finn nodded, “That includes Poe though.” His face fell a little but he still nodded.

“We kissed, then someone got into a fight and he left to sort it out, Hux approached me and told me he felt guilty over the pool thing and he had some information to give me that would make us ’ _ even _ ’. Of course I said I didn’t want to hear anything from him, but he just said it anyway….”

There was a pain in her chest suddenly and she stopped for a moment, trying to push aside the humiliation she felt at retelling this tale.

“Kylo Ren had a bet on with the other Knights… he bet he could trick me into letting him take my virginity.” She said awkwardly, her eyes unable to look at Finn’s face.

Finn made an outraged disgusted noise, but then fell silent, after a few moments one of his hands lifted Rey’s chin so she would have to look at him.

His expression hurt her soul, it was so full of compassion and care. It made her heart squeeze painfully in her chest.

“And you believed Hux?  _ Why? _ ” He said quietly.

Rey shook her head, “I do. I think he was being sincere, and it made sense. My first day you told me Kylo Ren was bad news… and why would someone like him be interested in the likes of me? I’m an orphan scavenger who doesn’t belong here. What could he possibly see in me? No, Hux was telling the truth.”

“But Peanut, Hux hates Kylo Ren as much as he hates you. I can’t believe I am saying this but he may have just seen an opportunity to hurt you both.”

Rey felt a flash of uncertainty but it passed, “No Finn. I don’t think so. It’s okay though, I’ll be fine. Kylo Ren can go fuck himself.”

Finn still didn’t look convinced but shrugged and they left the subject. As he finished his food he talked about Poe, making them both smile again.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo and the Knights had hit the gym, it was mostly empty and they turned the CD player up loudly, blasting the space with heavy metal. Kylo tried to exorcise some of his anger and confusion by beating the shit out of a punch bag. He then went onto weights, lifting more than he ever had before, enjoying the burn in his muscles. He longed to spar but he knew in his current state it wasn’t a good idea.

He needed to corner Hux or Rey and find out what had been said. But getting to either of them would be difficult.

He considered seeing if he could corner Finn instead, she may have told him. When they had left the dorm this morning he had seen Finn and Poe sitting on a sofa, worried eyes trained on the entrance to the kitchen, obviously still waiting for Rey to emerge.

The overtures of friendship between the Knights and Poe’s group of friends seemed to have fizzled out, the Knights had received hostile looks as they’d passed through.

Kylo went back to the punch bag, thinking about things had made him so full of frustration he thought he may explode. 

He worked till his knuckles were sore and bleeding, till Ingalan pulled him off it. “Kylo, you need to stop now. You look like you are going to collapse, and I am not carrying you to the nurse.” 

Kylo shut his eyes, willing the memory of him doing the same thing for Rey out of his head.

_ “Punch me.”  _

Ingalan blinked at him, “What?” 

Kylo sighed, “I want you to punch me. In the face.”

Ingalan looked over to where the others were gathering their things. “Kylo, none of us are going to spar with you today. It’s not a good idea, you know that.”

Kylo shook his head, “No, not sparring. Just punch me, I won’t retaliate…  _ I just need _ … some pain.”

Ingalan looked troubled, “Kylo, I thought we’d got you through this?”

“You had. And I won’t go back to cutting myself, but I just need…  _ something.  _ And I’d rather one of you did it than I pick a fight with someone else. No-” He said as Ingalan opened his mouth to interrupt him, “I don’t mean I’ll intentionally seek out a fight, but the chance of me losing control will greatly increase.”

Ingalan nodded, then looked around to see if anyone other than Knights were left in the gym. 

They were alone, “Where?” Was all he said.

Kylo shrugged, tried to grin, “Surprise me.”

Ingalan nodded again, sighed and punched Kylo in the face, Kylo shook his head, “Again.”

Ingalan stopped after five, flexing his hand and grimacing. 

There was blood coming from Kylo’s nose and mouth, his sweat stung as it ran into the split skin. He embraced it, the pain felt better, however fucked up that was, he felt better.

Zainmar came over and handed paper towels and water to Kylo and Ingalan, “You two ready for a shower? I don’t think you should swim with open cuts Kylo.”

“A shower would be good.” Kylo answered and Ingalan nodded.

_ This time yesterday they had been playing pirates. _ Kylo felt his chest tighten at the thought. As he let the hot water run on his face, embracing the burn, he considered going to see his mother.

But this wasn’t anything they could discuss… Han Solo though. He sighed. Perhaps it was time he went to see his damn father.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Finn and Rey met up a few hours later, Finn had gone back to Poe for a while and Rey had found a secluded area to go through some forms.

They walked quietly, Rey enveloped in Finn’s hoodie he had retrieved from Jess for her. As they went past the workshop Chewie appeared from somewhere, bounding over to Rey enthusiastically. She got down to give him a proper cuddle and fuss while Finn nervously looked on.

Rey was smiling delighted at Chewie’s welcome when she saw Kylo Ren approaching. Her face turned hard, and she felt as if a stone had come to rest in her stomach.

Chewie growled, Kylo looked up and paused a second before squaring his shoulders and making straight for them, his face looked like he had just taken a beating.  _ But she didn’t care. _

Rey stood up, her body tense, Finn moved a little in front of her, “Leave her alone,  _ Ren _ .”

Kylo glared at him then looked at Rey, “I need to talk to you, Rey I-”

But he was cut off as Chewie advanced on him, growling and showing his teeth.

Kylo looked shocked, much to Rey’s satisfaction. “Chewie you big furry idiot  _ it’s me _ .” Kylo took a few more paces forward and Chewies hackles raised. “What the fuck, Chewbacca?”

Chewie gave him a withering look then barked, a short, sharp sound, the humans paused for a moment, wondering what it could mean, then Han came swiftly out of the workshop, Chewie whined at him, then stood protectively in front of Rey.

Han took in the tableau with a raise of his eyebrows, “What’s up Chewie?” He asked the dog, the dog answered with some whines and a little growl and Han nodded as if they’d had a conversation.

Han looked at Kylo, “You. Go inside, I’ll be in in a second.” He glared at Kylo when he didn’t move, “I said, go inside,  _ Kylo Ren. _ ” He sneered a little as he said the name. Kylo glared then went inside casting several looks over his shoulder at Rey.

“You two okay?” Han asked after Kylo had gone inside. 

“Err yeah.” Finn said nodding.

Chewie rubbed his head in Rey’s hand and did a little whine. Han looked at her, “You sure you’re okay kid?” 

Rey gave him a brittle smile and a nod, then hesitated, Han raised an eyebrow in question and she said, “Do you have any spare door locks lying around?”

Han looked surprised then shrugged, “Yeah plenty, come round at lunch tomorrow and I’ll have one for you.” He gave them a nod then headed back inside.

Rey felt a small smile on her face, he hadn’t even asked her what it was for. Chewie gave a loving huff in her hand and then followed Han inside.

Rey turned to Finn, “Now let’s get the hell out of here before  _ he _ comes back out.”

Finn nodded, knowing the  _ he _ she spoke of.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: After writing this chapter i added Dream Of Mirrors By Iron Maiden to my Reylo spotify
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta ^_^
> 
> Thank you for all your comments, they are very much appreciated. <3


	31. The Shithead or The Scavenger (I Am Stone)

 

 

Kylo was sitting on the tatty sofa in Han’s office when Han came back in, shortly followed by Chewie.

The ridiculous dog came over to greet him, suddenly all smiles and wags. “Traitor.” Kylo muttered at him as he pulled the dogs ears. Chewie gave him a small grumble then closed his eyes as he enjoyed the fuss.

To his surprise Han handed Kylo a beer then sat down in his old leather chair across from the sofa, sipping from his own bottle.

Kylo drank in silence, unsure what to say or where to start, eventually Han said gruffly, “Well? I assume whatever you want must be rather pressing or you wouldn’t be here.”

Kylo closed his eyes a moment and then let out a breath before opening them, “I have… I need some advice about… a girl.” He finally got out awkwardly.

Han didn’t look surprised, just nodded at a look from Chewie. “You mean that Rey kid?”

Kylo swallowed and nodded, beginning to regret coming here. Han considered him a moment, absently drinking his beer, “What’s the problem then? Chewie says she’s afraid of you, what did you do?”

Kylo blinked, but not at Han’s allusion that he somehow communicated with the huge dog, Kylo had long ago given up thinking that was odd, no, it was... “She’s afraid of me? But why?”

_ Afraid? _ His chest hurt, and he hunched on the sofa, Chewie whined and lay his heavy head on Kylo’s knee, the weight comforting him.

“What happened to your face, Ben?” Han said, not answering Kylo’s question.

Kylo felt a flicker of anger warm him at Han’s use of his other name. “I got punched a few times,” he said dryly.

Han rolled his eyes and took another swig of beer. “I won’t fault your choice Ben, I like the girl.”

Kylo frowned, diverted, “But how have you even met her?”

Han smiled, a rare expression these days, “She’s in one of my classes, with the boys. She’s got talent and Chewie took to her immediately, as you saw.” Han actually grinned as he said that.

_ Of course  _ the Scavenger would want to do mechanics instead of textiles or art, Kylo almost smiled at the thought, his face softening.

The expression did not go unnoticed by Han. “I like her,” Han repeated, “Whatever you did, sort it out… I can’t give you any advice if I don’t know what you did… Though your mother would say you shouldn’t come to me for advice at all… and she’s probably right,” Han finished with a melancholy sigh.

Kylo grimaced at the mention of his mother but didn’t comment, instead he said, voice full of frustration, “I don’t know what I did and she won’t tell me; I have no idea!”

Han looked disbelievingly at him, “You must have some idea, Ben.”

Kylo shook his head, at both the statement and the use of his other name. “All I know is one moment we’re kissing,” He felt his ears and cheeks flush but he carried on, “The next, I leave her for a moment, on my way back to her I see her with that shithead Hux, he says something to her and she suddenly looked like she’s been stabbed in the chest and runs away! Hux is refusing to tell me what he said, and she won’t talk to me-  _ what the fuck am I meant to do _ ?”

He downed the rest of his beer and to his surprise Han offered him another, but he shook his head, best not have too much alcohol or he’d end up doing something stupid, like breaking Hux’s face; it would be satisfying but also stupid.

“Sounds like you’re up shit creek without a paddle. I’m sorry Ben I got nothing… you need to get it out of either the Shithead or the Scavenger, though it’s always possible one of their friends may break if they don’t… But I wouldn’t recommend shaking down her friends for information, that’ll probably piss her off even more.”

Kylo sighed and hugged Chewie to him, the dog smelling of grass and hot metal and damp fur, he smelled like home and Kylo buried his face in his neck, finding comfort.

“From what I’ve heard from Luke, you saved her life on Friday.” Han said suddenly as if he had just remembered. “I’m proud of you Ben.” He finished gruffly.

Kylo just grunted in reply then made a disgusted noise when Chewie turned to lick the side of his face. “Ow Chewie, not in the cuts!” Kylo sat up again glaring at the dog who just rolled his eyes and grinned.

“Luke also tells me she has quite a collection of scars... and I’ve seen her files. Kylo, you may not quite understand what you’re dealing with here.” Han said carefully, toeing the line of student-teacher confidentiality.

“What’s in her files?” Kylo asked, immediately interested but shook his head.

“I can’t tell you anything else, Ben. I shouldn’t have even told you that… When did you last see your Mother? She misses you.”

Kylo rolled his eyes at that and Han wisely left it, they talked a little more, then Kylo left and made his way to the refectory to meet the Knights for dinner.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

After their walk Rey agreed to hang out with Poe’s friends and watch a movie, she very deliberately sat in the corner of a sofa with Finn next to her, which meant no one else could sit with her. Poe sat on Finn’s otherside with a purring BB8 on his lap.

The movie was dark and violent and suited her mood completely, she let her mind be consumed by it, enjoying being fully immersed and not thinking about anything other than the plot.

They ended up going to dinner later than usual, the movie had left Rey feeling… itchy. Her body had extra adrenaline in it and she was almost spoiling for a fight.

She let the boys’ banter wash over her as they ate, (Jess, Kenjad and Maritan had eaten earlier as they hadn’t watched the film.) Their company was easy, most of the time they seemed to forget she was a girl, which suited her just fine.

As she ate her thoughts turned back to what Finn had said at breakfast, about whether she should have trusted what Hux had told her… But then she noticed Hux and his friends come in to the refectory to eat, he noticed her and his lack of gloating or amusement reaffirmed her opinion, surely if he had lied to upset her he would be smug right now?

Instead he gave her a small nod, then sat down with his back to her and started on his own dinner.

There was a little part of her that was disappointed, she realised, part of her still desperately wanted it to have been not been true. She hated that part of herself, it was weak, it had fallen for a lie. For a moment Rey couldn’t breathe, it was like her chest was clamped in a vice, but then it passed, leaving only anger.

On their way back to the dorm Rey asked Finn if they could get into the equipment cupboards at the gym, as she wanted to borrow a staff to do forms with, but he shook his head, “Sorry, Peanut. No weapons access at the weekends unless you are having a private lesson.”

Rather than go back into the dorm Rey peeled off and went into the wooded area hoping to find a stick with which she could practice. 

After rooting around for some time, she finally found one that would do, it wasn’t long enough or straight and it didn’t have the right weight or balance, but it was as close as she was going to get and it would do for practice.

She used her knife to strip the wood of small off shoots and rough bark where she would grip it, then went back to the secluded area she had used earlier in the day and practiced her forms with her substitute staff, as twilight grew deeper and faded into night around her.

After a while she changed to her knife, practicing moves that would work in close quarters fighting, the blade in her hand was familiar and welcome, it was a very old friend who had got her through some bad situations.

By the time she was done, she was sweating in the cold night air, despite having taken off Finn’s hoodie early. It must be near curfew so she gathered her things and made her way back to the dorm.

In her head lyrics from a song which had featured in the movie earlier played in her head, as she hummed the tune she decided they were good words to live by,  _ ‘I Am a Stone, Unaffected, Rain Hell Down Onto Me, Flesh and Bone, Unaffected, Your Fool I Will Not Be, I Am a Stone… _ ’   
As she entered the dorm she realised how much better she felt now compared to how she had felt this morning, her defenses were finally back up,  _ her walls _ , she smiled to herself as she passed through the common area, not even checking if the Knights were in there, after all, _ she was a stone. _

Rey paused in the kitchen to have some water, she stood at the sink, looking out of the window as she drank.

“Nice stick.” Hux said behind her and she turned calmly to look at him.

Rey shrugged at him, “Its a stand in till I get a better one,” She answered cooly.

“How are you feeling after last night?” He asked, and Rey raised her eyebrow at him,  _ why the hell did her care? _

“I’m fine.” She answered, and she meant it, she’d walled in all the hurt inside her now, it was behind a wall of ice and stone, no doorway, no back entrance.

If anything Hux looked surprised, was there a tinge of disappointment? She tilted her head to the side as she studied him, there was something there, beneath his pale blue eyes…

“You know even when you’re filthy and sweating you’re beautiful.” He said quickly.

And Rey blinked, distracted away from her previous line of thought. “What?” She said confused.

But Hux just gave her a small smile and left the kitchen. Rey shook her head,  _ what an odd thing to say _ . She finished her water, refilled her glass and took it upstairs with her.

By the time she got into the shower her sweat had turn to ice and she was shivering, the water burned as she sluiced the sweat off her body and the dirt off her hands.

After doing school work until 3am she settled down in her nest to sleep, she drifted off with her mind repeating  _ I am a stone  _ like a mantra.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

_ The closed fist is strong, but at its heart, lies emptiness. _

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Autonomee is my Beta and is wonderful ^_^
> 
> The song in Rey’s head is, "I Am A Stone" by Demon Hunter  
> Other songs I had in my head for this chapter are:  
> “(I Just) Died In Your Arms” by Cutting Crew  
> "Cold As Ice" by Foreigner   
> "Dying In Your Arms” by Trivium


	32. Delirium

 

Kylo and the Knights sat around playing cards. He had been turning over what Han said to him about Rey all evening, as they sat in the torch lamp light he finally came to a decision.

“How would you feel, about helping me break into the school office?”

Leonmar choked on his mouthful of Firewhiskey. The others looked skeptical, “Any particular reason why, or do you just fancy it?” Zainmar asked as he helpfully banged Leonmar on the back.

Kylo lifted his shoulders, “I want to read Rey’s file.”

Javiell snorted, “Of course you do. Is it just a passing fancy or is there an actual reason?”

Kylo shot him a look before speaking, “Han mentioned it this afternoon, it sounded as if it could hold information that may help me work out how to get through to her.”

They, and they alone of the other pupils here, knew who Kylo’s parents were, and unlike his parents they had embraced his new name.

Zainmar shrugged, “May as well, even if it’s just for shits and giggles.”

Javiell rolled his eyes, “It’s all shits and giggles till someone giggles and shit. This could go horribly wrong... But fuck it, I like a challenge.”

Kylo allowed himself a grin at that, at least it felt like he now had something to do, they abandoned the cards and set about planning.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was raining outside with a wind whipping till it was falling at a slant. When Rey went down for tea the next morning, she found Poe in the kitchen, he looked at her uniform and frowned.

“Good morning, Rey” He said, “You may want to wear tights today and definitely a coat, it’s gone cold suddenly.” 

Rey grimaced, she had never worn tights, had never needed to and they looked like they would be very uncomfortable. “I don’t think I have any,” She answered as she made her tea.

“Ask Mara, she usually has a supply of girl.. things in case someone runs out.”

Rey nodded resignedly, “Okay, thanks.” And Poe laughed at her mournful tone.

“I think it’s unfair girls can’t wear trousers, especially in the winter. Hell, in the summer I wouldn't be against wearing a skirt when it's hot!” Poe grinned at her and Rey had to laugh at that. 

Once her tea was made she went to find Mara who gave her a pack of tights and another blanket for her room.

She broke the first two pairs of tights she tried to put on,  _ they were ridiculous things!  _ And by the time she managed to get the third pair on and go downstairs she was glaring and muttering to herself.

“Hi Peanut,” Finn said grinning at her from a sofa then flinched as she looked at him, “Whoa, what’s wrong with you?”

Rey pointed angrily at her legs, “ _ I fucking hate tights _ .” She almost growled at him and he looked at Poe, clearly confused.

Poe couldn’t hide his amusement and Rey turned her glare on him as he spoke, “Rey is wearing tights for the first time ever. I think we can infer that she does not like them.”

Rey collapsed next to them on the sofa, still grumpy, “I don't understand how you're meant to even get them on! And they are so uncomfortable!  _ Ugh _ . Why can’t I wear trousers?”

Finn put one arm around her shoulders whilst the other was around Poe, “Because this school has very outdated views on uniform.” He said sympathetically. 

Rey huffed, “Has any girl ever tried just wearing trousers? If we have to wear skirts, why are we allowed to wear trousers for sport?”

Poe titled his head as he thought, “Not that I remember, though to be honest, I think most girls are okay with it and never expected any other option. I wouldn’t voice the sports question too loudly or they may decide skirts are a good idea” He said and grinned at her.

Rey muttered a string of profanities under her breath at that, glaring at her legs again.

Finn patted her back consolingly, “Shall we brave the elements and go get breakfast?”

Rey nodded unhappily and pulled her coat on, it was bulky and she hated it. Today, was not a good day, though at least they had fencing this afternoon, that picked her mood up a little, at least it did till they went outside, they had only taken a few steps when Rey said, “Sorry guys, but I am not walking in this, see you in there.” And she started to run, the ground was slippery and she kept to the path instead of going the shorter route over the field, she heard Poe and Finn speed up too.

Even so when they got into the refectory they were wet and cold, the wind had kept blowing her hood off and Rey’s head was so wet she felt like she had been in the shower. 

Poe made she and Finn try porridge for breakfast and they took it over with hot drinks and sat at a table, Rey shivering as she took her coat off and put it on the back of her chair to dry.

The mush Poe made them eat was nice, it looked like it would be bland but it was quite creamy and filling.

Nevertheless Rey was still cold and wet when they started lessons and by the time it came to lunch she had started to feel... odd.

As she and Finn sat down with the others Maritan looked up with a smile of welcome that slid off her face as she took in Rey, she got up and held a hand against Rey's forehead, frowning.“Rey, I think you’ve got a temperature, you don’t look so good.”

Jess looked at Rey and nodded, “You’re lips are kinda blue, I think you should go to the nurse.”

Rey shook her head, “Nah, I’m fine.” She said airily. “I’ll warm up quickly when we have fencing.”

Jess and Maritan exchanged a frown but Rey ignored it and started picking at her food,  _ nothing _ was going to stop her from attending fencing, but she did decide to postpone going to get the lock Han had promised her.

It was still raining as she and Finn made their way to the gym and before Rey changed she blasted her hair with the hairdryer.

Even so she was still shivering when she entered the studio and started to warm up with the others.

Once Luke deemed it time to start he put Ryleaf and Crispaul with Rey, “Okay, this breaks with convention and is rather different to what you have done before; Ryleaf and Crispaul, I want you to spar with Rey at the same time, two against one. Think you can handle that?”

Rey grinned behind her mask, ignoring the strange feeling that was making her a bit dizzy, “I’ll give it a go.” She answered and Ryleaf snorted. 

“Of course we can.” Crispaul said slightly indignant. Rey smirked, and started to slip into the cold place.

But something wasn’t quite right, she seemed more removed from reality than normal as she centred herself, but she paid it no more thought as she lowered herself into the En garde position.

Rey shivered, irritably trying to shake off the feeling and ignoring the odd ache in her muscles.

“En Garde!” Luke called across the room, and Rey tried to focus on her opponents, but it was proving difficult.

“Ready!” Luke’s voice seemed to come from far away, as Rey tried to sink deeper.

Rey shook her head and saw the boys coming at her, she must not have heard Luke call the command to ‘Fence.’

As the two boys came at her, her rationality seemed to fade and all she saw were opponents.

_ And she had to take them down _ …. Rey blanked out, it was just a second and yet when she came back to herself, she found herself lying on her back, Luke was holding her down and shouting at someone to go and get the nurse.

Rey frowned, she felt so hot and so cold, it didn’t make sense… then she realised she was struggling to get up, almost fighting Luke and she stilled her limbs, confused.

Her mouth was so dry, making her cough, Luke looked down at her, “Rey? Are you with us again?”

Rey shook her head, “What happened?” She asked, wincing at a pain in her chest and head. “Did someone hit me on the head?”

Luke’s face was tight with concern, “Do you think you can sit up?” 

Rey nodded but as soon as Luke let her go she shivered then her whole body convulsed, things became blurry, someone tried to help her up but she scrambled away defensively,  _ they were trying to hurt her, _ she stumbled into a corner, holding a practice sword by the blade, not noticing that her hard grip on it was making her hand bleed.

She lost some time, but then there were shapes coming at her, monsters that would hurt her, shapes in black and white and she fought them, or tried to, but they wrestled her to the floor, then someone was holding her down as she convulsed, someone stroked her face, her hair and she stilled at the contact.

The pressure of being held down eased slightly and she curled her body around whoever was stroking her hair, shivering despite the warmth of their body seeping into hers.

Rey lost more time. Then she was being carried, a blanket covering her as they went out into the cold, and she hunched her body tightly in on itself.

Once inside again someone took the blanket off her face, her vision was still blurry and she thought she saw ghosts closing in on around her, and started struggling again.

Strong arms tightened around her, and the motion stopped, something sharp entered her neck and she almost screamed as she thrashed.

She was held against a wall, confined. Lead seemed to seep into her muscles and she slowly quieted, “Rey,” Someone whispered in her ear. 

She shivered, “ _ I had to kill them,” _ she tried to look up but her head was so heavy, “..  _ their ghosts, are gaining on me…  there was so much blood… _ ”

Then true darkness took her and the world rushed away into nothing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

One of the year 11 boys came and found the Knights whilst they were fencing in a free period. They looked up in surprise when he skidded into their room shouting, “ _ Master Luke needs your help in the big studio now!” _

He sounded so panicked they dropped their sabres and ran after him.

They entered to pandemonium, all the boys were milling about in one corner whilst Luke and one boy stood in the centre of the room eyeing the opposite corner.

In the corner crouched someone in whites spattered with blood, they were holding a foil by the blade, the blades weren’t really sharp so their grip must be very hard indeed for it to be drawing blood.

Luke looked up as they entered, relief on his face, then turned to the boys in the corner, “You lot, out,  _ now _ .”

They didn’t need telling twice, two of the boys seemed to be injured as they were being helped out by others. “Ryleaf, Crispaul go to the nurse's office.” Luke said as they were about to go out the door.

Then he turned to the Knights, “I’m afraid I need some help… a pupil has fallen ill and seems to be delirious- she doesn’t seem to know where she is and I can’t contain her on my own.” He gestured at the corner as if they hadn’t seen. “She is.. very strong and really doesn’t want anyone near her.”

“Her? I thought this was a boys class.” Javiell said.

Kylo closed his eyes, realisation coming just before Luke said, “It is but Rey White is also in it… I’m warning you now she has a fairly... unique fighting style.” He turned to the boy in whites still in the room, “Finn, you can go now.”

But Finn shook his head, “I’m her best friend, I’d like to stay.” 

Luke sighed but nodded. “I’d keep your masks on,” He said, even putting one on himself.

As they advanced on Rey, Kylo could hear her muttering to herself but it was too low yet for him to hear what she was saying, suddenly she tensed, as if she had only just noticed them, she tossed the foil to her other hand and staggered up, swaying.

With the five Knights, Luke and Finn it wasn’t long before she was pinned down but she had bitten Ingalan, got a punch in to Zainmar’s jaw and kneed Luke in the groin. 

If Kylo wasn’t so scared he would have found it funny. Leonmar kicked the foil away from her hand once he’d trodden on it to loosen her grip and Kylo pinned her, the others holding her legs as she struggled. 

Finn pulled off her mask, her face was sweat soaked, her eyes glassy and unseeing, her lips dry, then her whole body convulsed, her eyes rolling up in her head as she thrashed.

Kylo held her down with a hand and a shoulder, using his other hand to stroke her face, smooth her hair away from it.

Rey seemed to calm at the touch so he continued and as her body stilled the others let go and her eyes closed. Then she curled her body around where he crouched, tightly pressing herself against him.

Luke pulled his mask off, wincing, obviously in pain, “Kylo, don’t stop doing that, it seems to be working. Finn go and find the blanket in the first aid kit, then we need to get her to the nurse’s office.”

Finn ran off and the other Knights pulled their masks off, Ingalan taking Kylo’s off for him so Kylo didn’t stop stroking her face.

“What the hell is wrong with her?” Zainmar asked Luke, as he rubbed his jaw.

Luke frowned, “Finn said she got very cold and wet this morning… it appears she got some kind of fever, a severe temperature… As she grew up in the desert I can only assume her body has never had to deal with this sort of thing before.”

Finn came back with the blanket and Kylo gathered Rey into his arms and stood, no one raised any objection to him carrying her... He had a strong sense of déjà vu.

Finn covered her in the blanket and they went downstairs, Luke told Ingalan and Finn to assist but sent the other Knights off.

Rey had been very still the whole time, but curled tighter against him once they were outside, Kylo felt his heart stutter at her action.

When they were inside the main building Finn took the blanket off her face and her eyes opened but seemed unable to focus properly, something she saw frightened her though and she started to struggle again and Kylo had to almost crush her to him to contain her, just then the nurse found them, a syringe already primed, they stopped and the nurse pushed the needle into Rey’s neck.

Am awful sound came out of her mouth, not quite a scream, not quite a sob, but pure terror and she tried to wrestle her way out of his arms.

Rather than drop her he pushed her against the wall of the corridor, holding his body against hers, Ingalan holding an arm, Luke holding the other.

It didn’t last long though, whatever she had been injected with seemed to start working and the fight went out of her. 

“Rey,” He whispered in her ear, barely a sound but she seemed to hear him. She shivered, “I had to kill them…” She muttered at him, the words slurring as if she were drunk. Her head fell to rest on his shoulder, “Their ghosts, are gaining on me.” He could see her trying to open her eyes but they just shut again, then she took a sudden frightened gasp, “So much blood…” She whispered, then fell limp, as if she were a puppet whose strings had just been severed.

The nurse came forward and thumbed opened her eyes, “She’s out. And will be for a while. We need to get her to my office.” She said briskly and Kylo gathered Rey into his arms again and they all followed the nurse.

Kylo couldn’t help wondering about what Rey had just said, though in her delirium it could have been just fever dreams.

Her slender body pressed against his was burning, her face was flushed when he looked down at her, and he couldn’t help being afraid.  _ She was driving him crazy. _

The nurse shooed Finn, Ingalan and he out immediately after Kylo had deposited Rey on the bed.

They paused outside the office, Finn shooting them an uncertain look, just as he was about to leave, Kylo caught his arm.

“Do you have any idea what Hux told her on Saturday?” Kylo asked, then as Finn’s lips thinned, Kylo added,  _ “Please?” _

Finn studied him, glanced at the door Rey was hidden behind then looked at Kylo again. “Yes.” He said, “But she asked me not to tell anyone.”

Kylo frowned but tried to remain calm, before he could answer Finn though, Ingalan spoke.

“But surely if it was something to do with Kylo, Kylo would already know it, so you wouldn’t be breaking your word not to tell anyone?”

Finn and Kylo both frowned as they followed his somewhat skewed reasoning.

Finn sighed, “Okay, but you did NOT hear this from me, okay? To be honest I doubted it anyway, as it came from Hux… He told her that Kylo had a bet on with the rest of you that he could trick her into letting him take her virginity.”

Suddenly Kylo’s head was throbbed, his vision seemed to be tinged with red and he suddenly felt dizzy.

“ _ Oh, shit _ .” He heard Ingalan say, “Finn, dude, you gotta help me, we need to get him back to the gym,  _ now _ .” Finn protested but Ingalan rode over him, “I don’t think you understand, at the moment, he looks calm, but he is about to lose his shit in the worst possible way and  _ I need the other Knights to contain him. _ Now grab his arm.”

Kylo felt himself being propelled along as his thoughts crashed around his head. He felt sick. Ill with fury, his skin icy as he processed what those words must have done to Rey.

Rey, who had never even kissed anyone till that night, the girl who was shy about her body, who didn’t really accept physical contact unless it was violent. A girl who had a room on her own, on a floor on her own, when she could have bunked with other girls.

They made it outside and the rain hitting Kylo’s face snapped him out of thoughts and he snarled, it was such an _ inhuman sound. _

“Finn, go and get the other Knights,  _ NOW _ ” Ingalan shouted and Finn let go Kylo’s arm and shot off, then he and Ingalan were wrestling, Kylo trying to go back into the school to find Hux and rip him apart and Ingalan desperately trying to get him to go the opposite way to the gym.

Ingalan lost ground quickly, Kylo had lost himself to the beast, they were soaked, wrestling in the rain, Ingalan using his his full weight as an anchor.

Then the rest of the Knights were there, Finn too and slowly, they dragged him back to the gym, once they got inside it became hard to resist their pulling as his shoes slid along the floor and somehow they got him back into the small studio, Ingalan called for Finn to leave, then they piled onto him, pushing him to the floor using their combined body weight to still his flailing limbs.

“What the hell happened?” Zainmar asked as he shook sopping hair out of his eyes whilst he lay on one of Kylo’s legs.

“We found out what Hux told Rey on Saturday.” Ingalan said through gritted teeth, “I’ll tell you later, he doesn’t need to hear it again right now.”

“Should we try and get him to a punch bag?” Leonmar asked, breathing heavily as he held down an arm and shoulder.

“He isn’t ready yet, he’s too far gone at the moment.” Ingalan answered.

“So what do we do?” Javiell asked, his weight pressing down a leg and hip.

“ _ I don’t know.” _ Ingalan said; and it was his utterly lost tone that got through to Kylo, it was so unlike him, Ingalan always had an answer.

Kylo tried to calm his breathing, tried to push his rage down, back into its cage. It was slow going, but eventually his head cleared enough for him to speak almost normally.

“Let me up,” His voice sounded hoarse but controlled, Ingalan peered at his face, then nodded as relief flooded his expression.

The others cautiously got off him, sitting back, ready to dive back on him if necessary, after a moment Leonmar got up and grabbed bottles of water for everyone.

Kylo drank gratefully, then wiped the wet hair out of his face and looked at Ingalan, there were bruises appearing on his face and Kylo felt an awful stab of guilt.

He touched Ingalan on the arm, “Sorry, brother.” He said softly, and Ingalan shook his head and gripped his arm back, “No apology needed, you should know that by now, brother.”

Kylo felt a lump in his throat and had to look away, he coughed then said, “You may as well tell them, I think I can handle hearing it now.”

Ingalan studied him a moment then nodded, and told the others. Kylo tuned it out, despite saying he could take it.

His thoughts wandered off to Rey, wondering how she was doing, hating that she had believed something so vile of him...  _ ‘You know I can take whatever I want.’  _ The memory of the words from his dream made him came back to him, and he shivered.

Zainmar’s angry voice called back his attention, “So, what are we going to do, Kylo?”

Kylo closed his eyes briefly before looking at them, loving them for their expressions of outrage.

“Nothing.” He said quietly, much to their confusion, then went on, “We wait. I’d like to talk to Rey before this all comes out, and she is currently delirious with fever. I want to pick my moment and I want to make sure it is something Hux,  _ never _ forgets. I imagine Finn will keep his mouth shut, and I will encourage him to do so… If I just go and break Hux’s face, I’d probably be expelled and then I wouldn’t be able to see Rey or any of you and in a way, Hux would have won.”

By the time he had finished talking they were nodding and looking thoughtful. 

“We could always… make it look like some kind of accident.” Javiell said slowly and they all turned to look at him. “It depends how far you want to take it, but… for an example, If he fell down the stairs and broke his neck, who would know otherwise?”

Everyone gave Javiell shocked looks, but Kylo smiled, “It’s tempting, but if he’s dead, he isn’t suffering is he? He isn’t humiliated…. The problem is that the only thing Hux loves is himself and his rep… But we have time to think about it. But… I may need your help, if he comes near me, I may flip out again.”

Kylo couldn’t help laughing when they gave him disgusted looks, he shouldn’t even have had to ask. They were his brothers, after all.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Autonomee is my Beta, massive thanks goes to her for correcting my shitty spelling and noticing mistakes that my stupid brain misses constantly <3
> 
> I had 'All That I'm Living For' by Evanescence in my head for this chapter, one of the lines is: Lock the last open door, my ghosts are gaining on me...


	33. Blood Thick Dreams

 

_ Rey was adrift in blood thick dreams, a world tinged red with her misdeeds, the blame she placed upon herself, the lives she had taken, the truths she had hidden from, locked away in their dark caskets. _

_ But now they were laid bare again, her dirty hands would never come clean, in the scarlet wasteland, she knelt in the sand, watching as the ghosts clawed their way out of the sinking fields. It did not matter that it had been self defense, it didn’t matter that they had tried to hurt her, take her, use her. _

_ She could have incapacitated them, she could have run away, but she’d lost control, she’d tasted revenge, in the empty void, she had served it cold. _

_ No matter that their deaths had meant they would never hurt anyone else, she still felt the stain, the taint. _

_ Her eyes wept blood as she watched them advance, tasted it on her tongue, metallic and sour,  mixed with fear and anger. Where was the coldness now? Where were the stars, that unlike her parents had never abandoned her? _

_ The sky was an empty red hell, rent by bloody lightning, she felt the heat of it burning her skin, screamed as she blistered and charred…. _

_ But a lone star shone in the west, it was black, yet it pulsed with a white light, and as it brilliance enveloped her, a cleansing coolness pulled her out of the dream and into darkness, oblivion welcoming her home. _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey slowly became aware of a soft, cool, damp cloth wiping her face, her eyes felt heavy and her limbs ached. She tried to lick dry lips but her tongue was too thick and swollen, she could taste blood.

The feeling of the cloth vanished and a straw was pressed against her lips, then there was cool water in her mouth and she almost passed out with relief.

The cloth came back and gently wiped her eyes and she finally managed to open them, the room and woman seemed vaguely familiar but she couldn’t place them yet, the lights were low and she was in a bed, she tried to move her arms and found that she couldn’t, she made a small frightened moan.

“Rey, are you with me honey?” The woman said, looking at her closely, “Do you know where you are?”

Rey opened her mouth to speak but her throat was still too dry, the woman held the straw to her mouth again and she drank greedily. With the fluid came memory and Rey frowned.

“Joselor?” She croaked and the woman gave her a small smile.

“Yes dear, how do you feel?” 

“Why can’t I move my arms? What happened?” Rey’s voice was hoarse, as if she had been screaming for hours. Which was ridiculous because she never screamed.

“Sorry honey but we had to restrain you, you’ve had a bad fever with a very high temperature, you were delirious. I can take them off now though, you’re looking a lot better.” And Joselor undid the soft leather cuffs that had bound her wrists, ankles and torso.

“You’re a very strong young woman.” Joselor said her voice tired, and Rey wondered how long she had been out, a snatch of one of her dreams passed behind her eyes and she shivered.

Joselor frowned at that, “You are sure you’re okay?”

Rey gave a small nod, “I am, I was just... remembering a bad dream.” She yawned, and lifting her arm up to hide her mouth was surprisingly taxing.

Joselor gave her some more water then said, “All right, you seem to be out of the woods, but you need to rest, you look like you’re ready to go back to sleep now, so do. The more you sleep the faster your body will heal itself.”

Rey barely nodded before slipping away again and though her dreams were muddled, they were normal; no blood soaked wasteland and no creature in a mask.

 

~~~

The next time she woke she was able to sit up, to eat a bit, to take some awful tasting medicine, then she slept again.

 

~~~

When she woke next it was to someone stroking her hair, she felt her mouth curve in a smile as she tried to surface and the hand moved to her cheek then traced her lips.

She let out a little sigh, and she tried to open heavy eyes, lips touched hers, achingly tender and she tried to reach out a hand but it was gently pressed back down to the bed.

“Shhh, go back to sleep, Scavenger.” Hux’s voice said.

And the hand went back to stroking her face, the caress making sleep pull her down before her brain could process that something about this wasn’t right.

 

~~~

This time when Rey woke, she was fully awake, she sat up on her own, grimacing at the odd white gown she was wearing…  _ wait. Oh hell,  _ that meant someone had changed her clothes...  _ Shit, had they seen the cut on her side? _

She felt her cheeks burn as Joselor took her temperature, checked her eyes.

“You are looking much better, but you’re going to be as weak as a kitten for a while I am afraid. Do you feel well enough for a shower? There is one here with a seat so you wouldn’t have to stand and your friend Jess brought you some pyjamas to change into.” 

Rey frowned slightly at that, she didn’t have any pyjamas, but the sound of a shower sounded wonderful as she realised just how…  _ icky _ she felt.

When she took off the white gown she was relieved to see she was still had on the vest that had been under her fencing whites, as well as underwear.

During what was possibly the best shower ever, Rey was horrified to find she did need to sit down, her legs were wobbly, and she noticed with shock she seemed thinner, how long had she been out of it?

The pyjamas turned out to be something of Jess’s, they were dark red and silky, the v neck in the top was alarmingly low. At least the underwear was Rey’s own.

When she finally made it out of the bathroom, she found Joselor had remade the bed and she sank into the clean sheets with relief.

Rey obediently took the medicine then ate some grapes to get the taste out of her mouth.

Yet again she found herself exhausted by that little effort and lay back against the pillows, she felt her eyelids grow heavy as Joselor rebanaged the long slice on her hand she’d apparently gotten when she’d been delirious. 

“I’ve got to pop out soon Rey, but one of your friends has volunteered to come and sit with you, okay?” Joselor said.

Rey nodded slightly, and slept again.

 

~~~

A taste of her fever vision came back to haunt her dreams, this time she could run away but they were gaining on her- the ghosts of her past trying to catch up to where she was now, her breath was harsh in her chest, her legs ever weakening, she felt skeletal fingers in her loose hair.

Then she was in someone’s arms, they rocked her, stroked her hair, her back and she slowly came awake, trying to calm her breathing.

Rey realised she didn’t know who was holding her and pushed against their chest so she could see. It was Hux.

Rey frowned in confusion, “Am I still dreaming?” She asked sleepily as he looked down at her, he smiled, amusement tinging his voice, “I don’t think so, but let me check.”

He leaned down and kissed her mouth, she was so shocked she let him for a moment, then pulled away, shaking her head, the covers had slipped down to her waist and she hurriedly pulled them up to her neck. Hux looked disappointed. 

“ _ What are you doing _ ?” Rey stuttered at him, aware of how close he was to her, that they were alone together. How long had she been asleep with him there?

Hux smirked at her, “I told Joselor I’d watch you as she had to step out.” He tucked some of her hair behind her ear and she leaned away, covers still held up protectively in front of her.

“You are very pretty when you’re sleep, but you looked like you were having a nightmare so I woke you up… Nice pyjamas by the way.”

Rey felt her cheeks heat, “They aren’t mine.” She said curtly, then frowned at a whisper of memory, “Were you here before?” Her mind seemed to be full of smoke.

“I was, you were much happier about it that time.” And his fingers brushed her cheek as she blushed again.

Rey jerked away, “But you kissed me! Why?”

He smirked again, “Because I wanted to. I saw an opportunity and  _ I took it. _ ” He said it as if that were perfectly normal, perfectly acceptable. Rey put a hand to her head as she frowned.

“I think I prefer you half asleep though,” he carried on, “You’re so much more…  _ willing. _ Sadly I wasn’t allowed in when you were restrained.” He licked his lips, Rey didn’t know if it was on purpose or not but it made what he had just said even more disturbing.

“I think you should go now.” Rey said, disgusted at the tremor in her voice, her back was pressed up against the wall now, she was as far away as she could get, her mind kept slipping back to how weak she had been in the shower, she didn’t know if she could fight him, she certainly wouldn’t be able to run away.

Hux tilted his head as he looked at her, then smiled, “You’re finally afraid of me.” He leaned in close to her, pulling her wrists down so the covers slipped and he exhaled over one of her breasts, then flicked his tongue over the fabric, Rey gasped, and he smiled up at her as her nipple went hard. 

Then he crushed her body to him, kissing her mouth, one of his hands rubbing lazy circles on her breast and his other holding both her wrists. She struggled, weakly and he groaned as she did, she bit his lip and he pulled away to look down at her, blue grey eyes burning in his pale face. “You have no idea how sexy you are when you’re weak and afraid.” He told her, voice rough.

Rey summoned all the anger she could, letting it burn through her and pulled her wrists free, shoving his chest when both hands, “If you touch me again, I will scream.” She hissed at him, fear driving her fury now, lending her strength.

But Hux just laughed, “I would love to hear you scream one day, Scavenger.”

“Then I won’t do it.  _ I will gut you like a fucking grunter  _ if you lay one more finger on me. I mean it.”

Hux just smiled at her, “I know you do.  _ It’s delicious. _ See you around, Scavenger.”

Hux left, closing the door behind him, Rey tried to calm her breathing, she wanted another shower but was too tired as her adrenaline drained away and she collapsed back on the pillows. She drank some water, swirling it around in her mouth, then wiped her lips several times, grimacing in disgust.  _ What game was Hux playing? _ She shivered, pulling the covers around her, rubbing her traitorous nipple.

_ She needed to get out of here _ and back to the safety of her room. Glancing round she noticed a pile of her wonderfully scruffy clothes on the floor, she grabbed them, stumbled into the bathroom, locked the door and changed out of Jess’s pyjamas, into her wonderfully boyish clothes.

They made her feel stronger, and she put up her hair and pulled on her boots. Then she brushed her teeth till she spat blood and washed her face in cold water.

After that she felt somewhat cleaner and unlocked the bathroom door, to her relief, Joselor looked up from her desk as she entered, there was no one else there.

“Rey!” Joselor said, surprise and disapproval in her tone, “You shouldn’t be out of bed yet, let alone dressed.”

Rey tried to look convincingly chipper as she said, “I’m sorry, but I felt so much better and I think I would sleep more soundly in my own bed, please may I go back to the dorm?”

Joselor got up and gestured for Rey to sit, “Let me have a look at you and we’ll see.”

Thankfully either Rey was much better or her acting skills were good as Joselor, grudgingly said she would be allowed to go once she got word to Finn to come and collect her.

Rey tried very hard not to scowl at that, attempting to look attentive when Joselor told her she would have to stay off school for the next day, take her medicine and not play any sports for a week at least.

Rey suppressed her arguments and waited patiently for Finn. To her shock Joselor had informed her it was Wednesday evening; she had been out of it since Monday afternoon.

 

~~~

Finn bounced in, face full of relief when he saw her and wrapped her in a bear hug, “Mmmmfff!” Rey said and he loosened his grip on her.

“Stars! It’s good to see you awake and not crazy, Peanut.” He said, smiling sweetly at her.

Rey raised her eyebrows, “Crazy? What do you mean?”

Finn glanced at Joselor, then waved his hands, “I’ll tell you later, for now let's get you back to the dorm, it’s not raining at the moment which is good and Poe and I brought your coat with us and a wooly hat.” He pulled a hat out of his pocket and tried to put in on her head.

“You’re going to have to take your hair down, or it won’t fit on.” He said and grumbling Rey complied.

Joselor repeating the medication instructions to Finn, added he needed to bring her to see Joselor again at lunchtime on Monday for a check up so she could see how Rey was doing, and stressed the importance of called her if Rey got worse again. Finn nodded seriously then took Rey’s arm in his and they went out.

Rey paused at the door to thank Joselor, who gave her a tired smile and told her to get going.

Poe was waiting outside and he took Rey’s other arm as they walked.

She was just about to complain about them supporting her when she stumbled, and she kept her mouth shut.

She had to pause for a moment before they left the main school building and by the time they made it to the dorm Finn and Poe were practically holding her up.

“Damn, Peanut, I don’t think you were ready to come back yet.” Finn muttered to her.

“I’m fine, I’m just tired, honestly Finn.” Rey muttered, exhaustion dragging at her.

Finn sighed at her as if she were a recalcitrant child, “Okay, I’ll have to ask Mara if we can help you upstairs though.”

After what seemed like climbing a mountain Rey was finally in her own room, Poe and Finn thought her floor nest was hilarious and ‘ _ adorable’  _ and her scowling at them only seemed to amuse them further.

Finn pulled her boots off for her and tucked her into her nest. Rey was asleep before they’d even closed the door.   
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Songs in my head for this chapter: In the Flame of Error by Coheed and Cambria, Charlie Big Potato by Skunk Anansie
> 
> Kylo POV next chapter!
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	34. A Life Laid Bare

 

Once they had showered and dressed and left the gym, they went straight to the dorm,  ignoring the rest of their last lesson, (they had over shot it anyway so it didn’t really matter.)

They settled down in the games room to play something nice and violent. After a while Kylo handed over his controller and sat back to watch, he drifted off to sleep despite the noise in the room- the mental and physical exhaustion of the last few days getting the better of him.

~~~

He dreamt of Rey. He stared down at her from a great distance, and yet could see her clearly, blood soaked and broken, she knelt in the red dead sand that seemed to cover this miserable dreamscape.

He watched with alarm as the dead seemed to rise in front of her, slowly clawing their way out of the ground like a hideous mockery of plants growing.

_ Yet she did not run.  _ Why did she not run? He flinched as crimson lightning stuck her, he tasted blood as she burned, he couldn’t stand it, couldn’t bare her suffering and with all his being he  _ reached _ for her. 

Despite not having any tangible form he finally managed to touch her, he imagined coolness, something to soothe her burns, her agony, and he covered her, somehow pulling her out of the hell she had been trapped in. 

He moved her into darkness, securely wrapped in tender night and let her rest there, till her hurts were healed, her body whole, watching over her as she slept.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Kylo?” He jerked awake, to find Zainmar’s hand shaking him, “I think you were having a nightmare or something.” Zainmar looked a trifle embarrassed and Kylo quickly wiped his cheeks, blushing slightly to find dampness on them.

He sat up with a sigh, and gruffly said, “Shall we go to dinner?” He needed food, and then he would go and visit the nurse to see how Rey was doing.

They saved their game and made their way to dinner, the memory of the dream quickly slipping out of his mind, like water out of a sieve. 

~~~

To Kylo’s annoyance, Joselor wouldn’t let him in to visit Rey. He tried at various different times of day, but she always seemed to be there.

Joselor had never liked him, partly due to the amount of students he had sent to her office and partly because she was friends with his mother.

Still, in his visits he had not come away empty handed, Joselor’s rooms were opposite the school office and he had been paying attention to the layout, the level of security and the routine of the two receptionists...

They never locked the door whilst one or both of them were inside but they did if they were both out at the same time.

In the evening they locked the door and the hatch, but the hatch was left open during the day. That would have to be his point of entry. Or rather, Leonmars’s - he was the most slender of the Knights and would fit through easier than the rest of them.

They struck at lunch on Wednesday, Joselor had curtly informed Kylo she had had lunch when he asked if he could watch Rey whilst she went to get it, which meant she wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon. The two receptionists had just left and Leonmar had taken off his boots and blazer, and dumped them and his bag in an empty classroom,

While the other Knights kept watch in the different corridors leading to the reception, Leonmar slithered through the hatch with Kylo’s help.

After opening several filing cabinets with Kylo looking on anxiously, Leonmar found the one he needed and started rifling through it till he found Rey’s file with a quiet yet triumphant  _ “Yes!”. _

Kylo felt his heart, which was already pumping faster than normal, pick up even more, “Brilliant, but you need to photocopy it so we don’t have to actually steal it, we've got no more than five more minutes!”

Leonmar set about using the photocopier, there weren’t that many pages which was lucky, then he stuffed the file back in its cabinet and handed the pages to Kylo to stuff up his shirt before he pulled him back through the hatch.

A warning whistle came from Zainmar’s corridor and Leonmar hastily rearranged the sign out sheet that rested on the hatch before they walked away as casually as they could.

Not a moment too soon as the receptionists rounded the corner and looked suspiciously at them, “What are you two doing?” One of them asked, Kylo couldn’t remember her name. He put on an irritated look, as Leonmar sidled behind him slightly, trying to hide that fact he was only in his socks, “We were trying to visit Rey White, but Joselor won’t let us see her.”

The irritation was real, and they must have noticed him being turned away previously so they just gave him disapproving looks and went back into the office.

Kylo and Leonmar beat a hasty retreat, then ducked into the empty classroom so Leonmar could get dressed and they could hide the evidence of their actions more securely.

For the rest of the day the files in his backpack burned a hole in Kylo’s concentration and when classes finally ended he almost ran back to the dorm and up to his room so he could look at them.

It did not make for comfortable reading.

Rey didn’t even have a birthday listed, just the year it was suspected she was born, she was described as having been  _ bought _ , rather than adopted or fostered. Nothing about the parents who abandoned her, who  _ sold her. _

It also stated how much it had  _ cost  _ to get her away from her previous owner to Canto Bight.

There were no notes on who had paid, who had brought her here, just the terms of the will that pertained to her education here.

He shuddered as it described how she had lived, miraculously her owner, this Unkar Plutt, had not sold her on to a whore house when she got older. It appeared her abilities as a scavenger had been too valuable. She had practically been left to run wild, so long as she brought in enough scrap, enough salvage, Unkar Plutt had paid her no mind.

The next page went on to list her medical history, her known injuries, which were many. No wonder she was covered in scars, and this only mentioned the major wounds and breaks and how much she had weighed when she had been taken away.

Kylo felt sick, she had weighed less than half of his body weight. How had she even had the energy to stand up?

He read on. The next page contained her misdemeanors, mostly assault which went on to be proven each time to have been self defense. Kylo again wondered about her fevered words when he had carried her to the nurse’s office,  _ ‘I had to kill them’. _

He was part horrified, part awed, how had she remained so strong? How had she survived so long with a life like that?

He wondered how many people she had killed, at that moment he wanted to hold her so much it made his chest ache.

There was a comment made by the local sheriff's office that Rey was suspected of breaking and entering, pickpocketing, car theft and numerous other crimes, but she had never been caught. It appeared scrap wasn’t the only thing Unkar Plutt had dealt in, but like with Rey, it had never be proven.

It mentioned the weapons she had often had on her person as well, although not illegal, the sheriff had still noted down what she had been seen with in the hopes if would one day link her to a crime that would stick.

Various knives, a machete, staff, recurve bow, knuckle dusters, climbing pick… What must she think of this school? Reading this seemed like fiction, he couldn’t quite get his head around it.

She had been with Unkar Plutt about ten years, Plutt didn’t seem to have an exact date, it was stated she had no memories of her previous life.

As he reread the pages he noticed a detail he had skimmed over before… Unkar Plutt had branded Rey when he had bought her.  _ Branded. _ Like cattle.

Kylo very almost lost his lunch, he ran to the bathroom to throw cold water on his face, breathing deeply to calm his heaving stomach.

He was oscillating between fury, horror, disgust and pity, the mix of such strong feelings leaving him dizzy.

Rey had been through all that, and she had never had anyone to comfort her, there had been no one to go to when she was afraid. Even when she was injured, it mentioned she had done most of the repairs on herself, sometimes resorting to cauterising her wounds,  _ on her own. _

There was mention of ‘ritualistic’ looking wounds being found on her left side when she had been examined, but she had refused to talk about them, had even denied their existence. 

Kylo wondered what they had signified, had she done them herself or had they been done  _ to her, _ like the branding?

A hand clapped him on the back and he jumped slightly, turning to find Ingalan behind him.

“That bad, huh?” He said and Kylo just nodded. “You may want to hide them or destroy them once you’ve read them, I think Zainmar and Leonmar are getting more curious by the second. To be honest, I’m quite curious too..”

Kylo shook his head, “I don’t think I can let anyone else see them… some of the details are very…  _ personal _ . I’m not even sure I should have read them.”

Ingalan nodded understanding, “Makes sense. Anyway, it’s time for food, are you coming?”

Kylo felt his stomach churn uneasily and shook his head, “I don’t think I can be around food right now, you guys go ahead, I’ll see you later.”

Kylo returned to his room and hid the papers from prying eyes, he tried lying on his bed, tried to relax in the hopes it would calm his stomach but all he could think about were the details of what he’d read and he got back up, anger coiling through his veins.

He changed and went for a run, it was raining but he didn’t care and his mind slowly grew calm as he counted his strides and regulated his breathing, out here in the storm, he found peace.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Songs in my head: Light Me Up by Kobra and the Lotus and Wake Up by Coheed and Cambria.
> 
> Thank you so much for all your comments, I think i’ve said this before but want to say it again, I am completely blown away that people like this. And your feedback is very much appreciated.
> 
> I’m not tending to answer plot driven questions/suggestions as I don’t want to give things away (some of you have been right on the money). Your support keeps me writing, so thank you very much <3
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3 check her awesome new fic here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/13858734/chapters/31879464
> 
> Also if any of your want to link me to your work, (Or just personal favourites) please do ^_^


	35. There Will Be Blood (Veritatis Eicio Voluntas)

 

 

When Rey awoke next it was mid morning, she still felt tired despite how long she’d slept and she was slow to leave her nest.

Eventually her bladder pulled her out and she found a note that must have been slid under the door while she slept.

The note was from Mara, informing her Mara would be bringing her meals today. Rey eagerly opened her door to find a tray outside, it looked like it held enough food for two people and she quickly skipped over it to relieve herself then hurried back and carried the tray inside her room and set it next to her nest.

She felt awfully decadent, leaning against the bed, blankets wrapped around her, picking at the bread and fruit, the cold chicken, yogurt and slowly drinking her glass of milk.

Once she was full she moved the tray onto her table and opened her curtains so she could watch the sky from bed.

Her limbs felt restless and underused but she felt too tired and warm to stir outside. The rain had paused for a while and there were patches of sunlight breaking through the clouds, straining through the heavy grey sky. Rey still couldn’t believe how much water could be contained clouds.

They’d had storms in the desert, but they were made of wild winds and sand and rather than soak you they could scour the skin from your bones.

She drowsed, enjoying the play of light and shadows from behind her eyelids. It was a novelty to be in bed all day, though she thought one day would be all she could stand before she needed to _ do _ something.

Yet the day drifted by her quickly, like the scudding clouds that raced across the sky. She tried to do a bit of reading but she’d get past one or two paragraphs and would be jerked awake when the book fell from her hands.

Mara silently left lunch outside her door again but when it came to dinner she knocked and brought it in. “How are you feeling now Rey? I brought your dinner in as it’s hot and I didn’t want it to spoil. Are you feeling okay? You’ve left quite a lot of food.”

Rey blushed, “I’m sorry Mara, I couldn’t manage it all, but thank you for bringing it.”

Mara gave Rey a small frown, “You need to eat more dear, you need some flesh on those bones! Have you taken your medicine today?” Rey nodded, “Good, well that’s something. Now eat up your dinner before it goes cold, is there anything else you need?” Rey shook her head, “Okay then dear, I’ll pop in before lights out, just to check on you okay? See you later.” And Mara waddled out taking the remains of Rey’s breakfast and lunch with her. Rey had been planning on squirreling some of it away but it was too late now. 

She tucked in to the soup and bread, the soup was rich and thick, orange and spicy, she had no idea what it was but it was delicious, there was cheese and fruit too and some sort of cake thing.

She managed to eat half of everything before she had to stop, feeling guilty about the waste and disappointing Mara.

Her full stomach made her drowsy all over again and she fell asleep where she sat.

~~~

  
  


Rey jerked awake with a whimper, fumbling for her knife in the dark, wrapping her hand around the old familiar hilt, she clutched it to her and concentrated on calming her breathing.

Even though the details were already fading she knew that had not been a nice dream, Hux had been in it, when she was better she was going to skin Hux alive,  _ slowly _ . Rey shuddered, then jumped as she heard someone knock on her door.

“Rey, love, are you awake?” Said a soft voice.

Rey let out a relieved sigh and shoved her knife under her blanket, “Yes Mara, please come in.”

Mara turned the light on as she came in and Rey blinked up at her with a weak smile.

“And how are you feeling now? It’s an hour before lights out, is there anything I can get you?” Mara said with a smile as she went to get the dinner tray.

“I’m okay, thank you, though I think I will try having a shower before bed. Please, may I have some water?” Rey asked somewhat shyly, it still felt odd having someone do things for her.

“Of course, I’ll go and get it now. Have a nice shower, dear.” And Mara bustled off again.

Rey carefully slipped her knife under her mattress and went to have a shower, by the time she was done she was wobbly legged again and had to sit down to dry her hair.  _ This was ridiculous. _

And irritating. Rey decided tomorrow she would go to lessons and power through this disgusting weakness.

Her water was waiting in her room when she got back as was another spare blanket and a flat rubber bottle that was so hot it hurt her fingers to touch it.

She had no idea what it was for but she put it under the blanket she lay on top off, at the bottom so her feet rested on it.

Just before she went to sleep she pulled the knife out from under her mattress and held it in her hand underneath her pillow.

If she dreamt of Hux now, maybe she’d still have the knife in her dream; she had never actually skinned a human, but she had skinned plenty of rock rabbits, and she doubted it was that different, a dream would be the perfect place to practice.

Rey fell asleep with a smile on her face.

~~~

A slight noise and a cool breeze woke her again;  _ there was someone in her room.  _ She went from asleep to fully awake in less than a second and was up on her feet and slashing her knife at the intruders face in the next.

She felt it connect with flesh and sliced upwards then danced away as they sucked in a shocked, pained breath and clapped a hand to their face.

Rey went back for them, trying to take advantage of their distraction but her feet tangled in her blankets and she stumbled, she saved herself from face planting by dropping a knee to the floor but her advantage was lost and the wrist that held her knife was clasped in an impossibly strong grip, she was knocked over and a knee placed on her chest, she struggled to right herself but stilled when the intruder spoke.

“ _ What the fuck is wrong with you? _ ” Came a strained half whisper.

It was Kylo Ren. Something warm dripped onto her face and she tasted blood- not her own though.

“What the fuck is wrong with me? You’re the one creeping into my room!” She hissed back angrily.

He huffed a disbelieving laugh, “You did it first, remember?”

Rey froze, he was right.  _ Shit. _ “Sorry,” she muttered, “I thought you might be Hux.”

It was his turn to freeze, “Why Hux?”

Why couldn’t she learn to keep her fucking mouth shut? “It doesn’t matter. Let me up, you’re bleeding on me.”

“Oh, geez, I am  _ so _ sorry.” He said sarcastically, but he let go and stood up.

“Why are you wet? No,  _ no _ , why are you here? I told you I didn’t want to speak to you again.” Rey said testily as she rummaged around for her goggle lamp.

“I’m wet because it’s raining. I’m here because we need to talk, and I am not going till we do.” He said, pain now creeping into his voice, not quite hiding the desperation beneath it.

Rey shivered, “You’ll be here a long time then… ah got it.” She put her goggles around her forehead and clicked on the light so she could see his face, she gasped.

She’d got the right side of his face, all the way up his neck along his cheek and into his eyebrow, luckily she’d missed his eye.

“ _ Oh fuck,  _ Kylo, stay there!” And she ran for the first aid box that was kept in the bathroom, she was back in less than twenty seconds.

He was still standing where she left him, he was starting to look a little dazed. “Sit!” she barked at him and he did, she folded a small hand towel and pressed in unceremoniously against his face.

Kylo hissed and glared up at her. Rey felt her heart plummet into her feet, “I can patch it or I can go get Mara, it’s your call.”

His eyes were like two deep pools in his pale blood spattered face. “How bad is it? It didn’t hurt at first but now it does.”

Rey felt guilt start to pull at her, “My knife is really sharp… You don’t feel wounds like that at first… It’s, it looks pretty bad. There’s a mirror in the bathroom, if you want to see… I can sew it up or cauterize it or you can get them to take you to a hospital.”

“Wait, did you just say  _ cauterize it _ ?” He said blinking up at her in horror. Rey shrugged back at him, if anything he went paler.

“Okay, keep holding the towel there, I’ll go get one of the small mirrors and then you can see.” She flitted off again, silent on her bare feet, when she came back she said, “Brace yourself,” then sat beside him and held the mirror up, angling her face so the light from her goggles illuminated the mirror, he took the towel away and flinched, “ _ Just like my dream.” _ He muttered quietly but then composed himself.

Rey opened the first aid box and pulled out some antiseptic wipes, “Face me, let me clean it and we can see how bad it really is.” She said as calmly as she could.

He turned to face her but she had to stand up because he was too tall for her, she took his chin firmly in her hand then began cleaning his face with gentle hands.

She desperately tried to avoid looking in his eyes but it was difficult, as the blood washed away she saw that it wasn’t as bad as she thought and allowed herself a tiny sigh of relief.

“It may actually be okay just being taped… but err, you need to take your top off so I can see how far down it goes.” She swallowed and looked anywhere but at his face.

He went to pull it off, but she pushed his arms down, “Not yet, idiot, I’ll tape your face first.” Even though he was soaking she could feel the warmth coming off him in waves and it was making her feel…  _ funny. _

She meticulously set about taping the gash, trying to ignore his hisses, “You need to unclench your jaw, it’s changing your face shape.” She said as nicely as she could, he gave an amused grunt but complied. 

She stood back to look at him once she was done, then nodded, “Okay, let me help you off with your t-shirt.”

He started to grin them grimaced instead as it pulled his cut, she almost laughed at that but schooled her face and just helped him take his top over his head without it touching his wound.

He flung his wet hair out of his eyes and looked up at her, his pale torso almost glowing. Rey swallowed then looked away hoping her blush wasn’t visible in the light of her goggles, deep down she knew it was.  _ Ugh. Why was she still affected by him? _

She tipped his chin up so she could see where the cut ended, it went down to just past his collar bone, she set to work cleaning then taping it as she had done with his face.

Once she was done she went to step back but his hands came up and caught her waist, “We need to talk.” Kylo said again, his voice suddenly rough and intense. Rey started to shake her head and tried to step back but he said, “Okay  _ fine,  _ I’ll talk and you listen, I think you owe me at least that much.”

Rey opened her mouth to tell him to get out but she made the mistake of looking at his face and a stab a guilt pricked her conscience.  _ Why should she feel guilty?  _ He’d done an awful thing, tried to trick her,  _ had  _ tricked her. He’d taken away her first kiss, had made a mockery of it, had probably laughed about it.

_ I am stone. _ “No. I don’t owe you shit.”  _ Unaffected,  _ “If anything, that” She gestured to his face, “Makes us even.”  _ Your fool I will not be. _

Instead of letting her go, his hands gripped her more tightly and he leaned forward, his voice angry and full of frustration, “Why the hell would you believe Hux over me? I found out what he told you. IT. IS. NOT. TRUE.  _ He lied to you _ .”

Rey shut her eyes as if that would somehow stop her from hearing his words, she shook her head.

“Why would you believe him and not me? Why  _ HIM _ and not  **ME?”** He said in a furious whisper. “Why is it so easy for you to believe that I like you? Yet hard for you to believe he lied to you?!”

Rey kept her eyes shut,  _ she was stone, _ she was bloody stone. “Hux had nothing to gain from it.” She answered stiffly.

“Did he not? He hates me, he’s caused you no end of trouble since you got here…  _ wait,  _ why did you think I was Hux? …  _ why were you sleeping with a knife?”  _ His hands were on her face, “ _ Look at me damn it, why did you think Hux would come into your room?” _

Rey opened her eyes angrily, “ _ It’s none of your fucking business!” _

He stood up, and she was suddenly very aware of his naked chest just inches from her face, she had to tilt her head to look up at him.

“I think I deserve to know considering I got the wound that was meant for him.” His face was almost close enough for them to kiss, Rey shivered.

She went to step away from him but was still held by the waist, “I need to sit down.” She said tiredly, suddenly all the fight had drained out of her.

To her surprise he instantly let go of her and she almost fell over before he caught her again and lowered her into her nest, wrapping a blanket around her, then he got up and closed the still open window.

“Why is all your bedding on the floor?” He asked as he sat down with her, pulling one of her blankets around himself, then he pulled her protesting form against his chest. “Shh, I’m warm and you’re not, just shut up till you heat up.”

She knew she should pull away but he was right, he was like a bloody furnace, she settled down, accidently letting a sigh loose that sounded all together too happy.

His arm came around her, “ _ Finn  _ believes me, you know.” He said quietly into the silence. Rey made an angry squawk and tried to sit up but he held her firmly against his chest, and she was too tired to do anything more. “I can’t believe he told you! I made him  _ promise! _ ”

“But how could he have broken the promise if I was supposed to already know? If it were true I would have known… and _I didn’t_. Rey… what promise can I make you? What can I do to convince you that I wasn’t trying to trick you? That _I want you_? That _I like you?_ _What can I do?_ ”

He sounded so desperate, sounded so sincere, the stone around her heart was cracking.

Rey bit her lip, she was lost in the dunes, adrift, and she had no idea what to do… She thought back to Hux’s visit to the nurse’s office and she suddenly felt sick, but it wasn’t just the memory, it was his actions… why  _ had _ she trusted him?

She cleared her throat, “If you promise on the lives of your Knights that what Hux said isn’t true, I guess I’d believe that.”

There wasn’t even the slightest hesitation, he turned so he could look her in the eyes and said, “I swear on the lives of my Brothers that I made no wager to take your virginity... I swear on their lives that… That  _ I am falling in love with you _ .”

He said it so calmly, so intently, so…  _ honestly _ . Rey felt a sudden lump in her throat,  _ love? _

She felt tears spill over and run down her cheeks, inside she was boiling with anger, at Hux,  _ at herself. _

The world seemed to fall away from them, she felt tendrils of fury coil through her, so much it made her feel light headed.

Kylo turned her, his rough fingers brushing away the tears on her cheeks, she looked up at him and their eyes locked for a moment, the emotion in his frightened her, they were so dark and deep and she felt if she looked into them for too long she would become lost in them, so she reached up and tentatively touched her lips to his, closing her eyes as she did so.

He held his face perfectly still, yet she could feel the tension in his body, how much it cost him to not crush her to him.

His need for her made her feel weak, feel strange, she was unsure what words to use for such emotions. She lifted her right hand to his undamaged cheek, brushed her fingers over it then pushed them into his still damp hair, he made a small noise in his throat and she pulled away slightly, “Kiss me.” She whispered against his lips, and he did, taking away all her anger and fury over Hux, replacing it all with a burning need, a terrifying desire for something she didn’t yet understand.

She climbed into his lap, pressed herself against him, hands roaming over his chest, his arms, surprised at how smooth his skin was over the hard muscle, when his tongue pushed into her mouth it was her turn to moan, a wanton sound that she couldn’t believe came from her. She felt Kylo chuckle, his chest vibrating, his lips turning up slightly, but then wincing as it pulled the cut on his face.

_ Oh sweet hell, _ “Kylo, your face!” Her guilt suddenly tripled, “I’m so sorry! Hux really got to me when he kissed me and then I had a bad dream and I-”

Kylo’s fingers suddenly stopped her lips, “ _ Did you just say Hux kissed you? _ ” His voice had dropped into a growl, not a seductive growl, an outraged, angry, almost snarl.

Rey leaned back and put her own hand over her mouth, as if that would stop the words leaving it, “It doesn’t matter, forget I said anything.”

_ “No. _ It absolutely does matter. And you need to tell me,  _ now.”  _

And the words spilled from her lips, she couldn’t seem to keep them inside, she knew she should, it was a stupid thing to do, it wasn’t going to help anything to tell Kylo and yet it all came out anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was doing all he could to keep a lid on his anger. The night had been some kind of roller coaster, first he got stabbed, by the girl he loved, then they’d argued, then they’d made up, then they’d kissed and now… now he found out that the boy who had almost succeeded in pulling them apart had  _ kissed _ her….   _ Touched  _ her, even _ watched her sleep _ .

He shuddered like a wet dog in a chill wind, Hux had touched her somewhere Kylo hadn’t, had kissed her when it had only been Kylo who had.

With a gargantuan effort he caged the beast, took her face in his hands, “He will not lay another hand on you. I promise.”

She gave him a derisive snort, “Oh,  _ trust me _ , if he ever even tries again, I will kill him.”

Her words distracted him, “Rey, when you were delirious, you said some things…”

She looked at him frowning, “How would you know?”

Kylo gave her a wry smile, “It was the Knights and I that managed to subdue you after you went postal in your fencing class. I carried you to the nurse’s office, for the second time in a week.”

“Oh fuck.” Rey hid her face in her hands, “Who did I hurt?”

Kylo shrugged with an amused smile, “You got a couple of your classmates, you bit Ingalan, punched Zainmar nicely on his jaw and kneed Luke in the balls.”

Her horrified look made him laugh and she glared at him, then he sobered as he remembered why they’d started on this subject. “Rey, when you were delirious, you said… Rey, have you killed people?”

Her suddenly frightened look said it all, her eyes darted to the side as if she were looking for a way out and he felt her body tense to spring away but he held her tightly, looked into her face, “I don’t care, it doesn’t matter to me.”

He pulled her to him, kissing her lips, her cheeks, her nose, stroking her hair back from her face, “I don’t care.” He told her again.

She looked confused, so he kissed her mouth again, this time slowly, taking his time, eventually pushing his tongue into her mouth, building heat, communicating nothing but his desire till she was breathless against him, pressing herself to his chest again.

He deserted her mouth, trailing hot kisses over her jaw, down her throat, he experimentally used his teeth and she gasped, quivering against him. Her skin was now hot and flushed underneath his mouth and he kept on with his teeth, tongue and lips, every soft gasp, every little moan and every shiver,  _ a triumph. _

While he worked his mouth he slowly brought up a hand and lightly grazed a breast, to his delight she didn’t even flinch, he caressed it with more pressure and her breathing hitched, she was back in his lap and she had even wrapped her legs around his hips, “Can I... take your t-shirt off?” He whispered, his voice had grown rough, his breathing had deepened and he could feel his skin on fire.

She stilled in his arms,  _ Too soon, idiot! Too soon! _ But then she nodded, almost shyly and he pulled it off her before she could change her mind.

Rey was bare beneath it and his heart stopped for a second as he took her in then went double time as if to make up for it.

He lightly ran his hands over her, feeling almost drunk with how good her skin felt under his hands and the noises she made as he touched her, her breasts were small but perfect, fitting snugly in his hands, as soon as he touched them her nipples went hard and she gasped as he rubbed them, arching her body against his hands, unwittingly also pressing the apex of her thighs more firmly against him and it was his turn to moan.

He leant forward and took a nipple into his mouth, she jerked, breath stuttering as he swirled his tongue around it, then pulled away slightly holding it in his mouth then let it go. He swooped in on the other, her skin like silk under his tongue, painfully aware of his erection as he bit down, feeling his cock jump at the sound she made.

He pulled away from her, she was flushed and wild eyed and  _ sexy as hell. _ Stars, this was difficult. “Maybe we should… pause for a bit. I don’t want to rush you and if we don’t stop now…” He didn’t know how to finish that sentence without sounding like some kind of monster.

“ _ You know I can take whatever I want. _ ” She said, then looked horrified at herself.

Kylo froze, those were the exact words from his dream...

  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: In case you’re wondering, the soup is root Ginger and Pumpkin (It is amazing). 
> 
> For no apparent reason I had ‘Monster’ by The Automatic in my head while writing some of this… Also ‘Omen’ by The Prodigy, ‘Closer’ by Nine Inch Nails and Last Resort by Papa Roach. Next update probably won't be till day after tomorrow, T_T sorry <3  
> Also if i got the Latin wrong, please tell me!


	36. Dreams, Knives and Lies

 

 

“ _ You know I can take whatever I want. _ ” The words reverberated between them, creating an echo on its own.

Kylo suddenly realised that they hadn’t actually been said by Rey’s mouth, that the resounding echo was in  _ his head, in hers _ … they were  _ connected, _ somehow.

He stared into her eyes, imagining his own to be as wide and shocked as hers, neither of them spoke, the silence in the room making the words in their heads seem louder.

He realised with a detached part of his mind that she still had his blood on her face, her lips. He cleared his throat awkwardly and said out loud, “It wasn’t me… In the mask… at least, I wasn’t in control…  _ do you, feel it too _ ?”

She nodded, “I knew it wasn’t you somehow, but...  _ he was your double, _ and… That was  _ not  _ my first dream of him either... The first was on Wednesday, the second was late Friday when I… climbed into your room.” Her voice sounded shaky.

Kylo swallowed, “It was not my first either, I had one on Thursday night.. And in it, you gave me this.” He gestured to the new wound on his face. “And I am pretty sure this matches it identically, though you used a sabre…”

“Made of blue light?” She asked him in a whisper, and he nodded. Rey shivered and he absently pulled a blanket around her shoulders as they continued to stare at each other.

“Did I... did I hurt you? In your dreams?” He was afraid of her answer, yet  _ he needed to know. _

She gave a small shrug and he had to pull the blanket back up her shoulders again, “In the first one we fought with the light sabres, there were small wounds, but nothing significant,” She blushed and dropped her eyes for a second before carrying on, it made him remember the blushes he’d never found a cause of and he wondered what else had happened in that dream.

“In the second, it was like I was the prey and you the hunter, when you caught me you did… you went in my head, like you did in our dream, it hurt but it was nothing like-” She took in his face and winced, an awful, guilty look on her face, “Nothing like your face.” She finished miserably.  

Kylo pulled her to him, tucking her under his arm and holding her tightly, “It doesn’t matter,” He said, and it  _ didn’t,  _ it really didn’t, they were together now and that was what was important to him.

“But it does!” She almost cried, voice full of confusion and fear, “ _ What is happening to us? _ Where are these dreams coming from?”

Kylo stroked her hair, another question coming to him, “Rey, did you dream of a red wasteland and being hit by lightning when you were ill?”

Rey flinched against him, “You saw?” She asked, her voice barely a whisper now.

“I did,” He said gently, “I pulled you out… it was... awful. I watched as you burned,” He swallowed, bile suddenly burning in the back of his throat at the memory, “I couldn’t stand it and somehow I pulled you out.”

Rey sat up and took his face almost reverently in her hands, “You were the black star?”

Kylo looked back at her, heart swelling inside, “I don’t know what I was, but I seemed to be watching from the sky, so maybe that was what I looked like.” He didn’t ask her what that dream had meant, he thought he might have some idea and it would be nothing she would want to relive.

“Thank you.” She whispered, the words like a prayer and plastered herself against his chest, almost as if she would be able to sink into him.

They sat like that for sometime, their bodies against each other, Rey’s arms around him, her hands absently caressing his skin, his arms around her, one of his hands stroking her hair.

They breathed in sync, their hearts seemed to be beating as one, and Kylo slipped into her mind by accident. This was nothing like his dream though, like  _ their  _ dream. He wasn’t invading, he was just there, mixed in with her thoughts and feelings, it was bewildering, he obviously didn’t have the focus his dream-self possessed. But it was better that way, he shouldn’t even be there in the first place, he slipped out as softly as he could, afraid she would feel like he’d violated her.

Rey gave a little sigh and he realised she’d fallen asleep, he felt a stab of guilt. In his all consuming need to see her, he had selfishly forgotten how ill she had been.

He tucked the blanket more securely around them, and even asleep, just the scent of her skin and the feel of her body set his blood afire. 

He tried to think about other things, instead of the closeness of her; why was her bedding all on the floor? And what the hell was Hux’s game? He considered, very briefly, slipping into her mind to try and see her memory of her encounter with Hux, but he dismissed it almost immediately. It would be wrong _ and _ it would probably make him so angry he would go and rip Hux’s face off immediately.

He allowed himself a small sigh, and Rey murmured softly, shifting to curl herself against his body more firmly, just as she had after he and the Knights had wrestled her to the ground when she had been delirious. 

There was no doubt in his mind now that they were somehow meant to be together, but he wondered if there were a bigger picture that neither of them were seeing yet.

He had never heard of anything even remotely resembling their shared dream experiences, and he had no idea who he could even ask. It someone else told him that it was happening to them, he’d think they were drunk, high or just crazy.

He could hear birds start to sing,  _ shit, _ he didn’t want to leave but if he didn’t now, he’d have to spend all day in her room, (which admittedly didn’t sound terrible), but the Knights would miss him and someone might come up to see Rey.

He sighed and stroked Rey’s face, shifting her so he could kiss her awake.

“Mmmmm,” The noise she made was at once both languid and sensual, and it sent heat straight to his groin. 

He took a careful breath in before speaking softly, “It’s nearly dawn, I should be going.”

Rey sat up, hair messy, eyes sleepy, and even though she was wrapped in a plain blanket she looked like his own personal goddess.

She gave him a shy look then winced as she saw his wounded cheek, “Let me help you get your t-shirt back on.” She stood, rummaged around till she found it, then paused, nose wrinkling in distaste, “It’s still really wet, would you like to borrow one of mine?”

Kylo laughed at her, “It’ll be fine, it’s only just till I get back to my room. I doubt yours would fit me, even if they are too big for you.”

She rolled her eyes at him then helped him on with his long sleeved t-shirt, the dampness made him shiver and he felt his nipples harden, a few seconds later Rey had latched onto one with her hot mouth, sucked it whilst he stood frozen, then danced away looking ridiculously smug.

Kylo’s head spun as he quashed the urge to retaliate, “ _ I will get you back for that, _ ” He promised her, voice a low growl, “But now, I really have to go.” She let him grab her for a quick kiss then gently pushed him away before he could give in to his desire.

She went to open the window and looked up at him, looking a little shy again, “I could meet you downstairs soon? Unless you need to sleep?”

Kylo smiled carefully, trying not to pull the right side of his face as he did so, “I don’t think there is any chance I will be able to sleep now,” He sighed regretfully, “But I think you should, you were really ill, and I already disturbed your sleep enough.”

Rey opened her mouth to protest and interrupted herself with a yawn instead, Kylo smirked, “That is all the confirmation I need, I’ll see you later, at breakfast or if not then, at lunch.” He kissed her and put a foot on the windowsill before turning one last time, “By the way,  _ why is all your bedding on the floor?” _

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey pulled the blanket around her securely then shrugged self consciously, “The mattress was too soft, I guess I’m just used to sleeping on the floor.” 

Kylo’s face was an odd mixture of amusement and guilt, the wound on his face looked even worse in the dawn light and Rey felt her own guilt rise, but he leaned in for one last kiss and then he was hauling himself up and away.

She waited for a moment before shutting the window and pulling the curtain closed, then hauled her old t-shirt back on and settled back into her nest, blushing slightly, she could still feel everywhere their skin had touched, his mouth had touched. She shivered and snuggled into her blankets more, there was no way she was going to go to sleep now…

~~~

 

Rey woke with a start of surprise as someone knocked on her door, it was Mara, “Rey dear, may I come in?”

Rey hastily adjusted her blankets and answered, “Okay.”

“And how are you feeling- o _ h my goodness child, why is there blood on your face? _ ” Mara looked horrified and instantly knelt to feel Rey’s forehead.

Rey felt herself blush, “Oh, it’s okay Mara, I must have had a nose bleed or something, sorry.”

Mara frowned, “Well you don’t feel overly hot, but it looks more likes it was dropped on you, rather than come from your nose.”

Rey gave her a shrug as casually as possible while covering the antiseptic wipes with her feet, but Mara noticed the medical box on the bed, the bloody towel.  _ SHIT. _

“Rey, you need to tell me what’s going on.” Mara said quietly, but her voice was very serious.

Rey dropped her eyes, thinking furiously then sighed as a lie that may be believable came to her.

“Sometimes, I need to cut myself.” She mumbled quietly,  _ stars,  _ this had better work.

Mara sighed, as if she wasn’t completely surprised, “Okay, sweetheart, you need to show me so I can check, either I do, or I call the nurse.”

Rey nodded, then dropped the blanket she had around her shoulders and pulled up the side of her t-shirt, turning wordlessly so Mara could see.

“I need to take the bandage off, okay?” Mara said and Rey nodded again, resigned. “Hmm. This looks older than the last 12 hours, where did the new blood come from, Rey?”

Rey shifted uncomfortably, “I did it on Sunday, but last night I pulled the scab off... more roughly than I intended.”

Mara frowned but nodded, Rey wasn’t sure if she believed her or not. “Well it looks as if you know how to dress your wounds at least, but I am going to have to ask how you did it and you will need to see the school counselor.”

Rey winced, but nodded and careful not to knock the pillow that had her favourite knife underneath, she went to the wardrobe and fished out one of her lesser knives and handed it to Mara. 

Mara gave her a stern look and said with conviction, “And the other one.” 

_ How did she know? _ Rey sighed and fished out another of her knives, luckily it was the partner of the first one, they looked like a set so hopefully that would put an end to it.

Mara gave her a firm nod, “Okay, I will book you in to see Mrs. Organa, do you feel up to going to classes after lunch or would it be best to stay off?”

Rey gaped at her then looked at the clock, it was 12.40! Mara gave a small chuckle at her expression, and Rey was relieved to see her smile again, “I think we’ll just say you can start back on Monday, put on your uniform and eat lunch with your friends… but wash your face first! After lunch you need to come back here, okay?” 

Rey nodded and Mara breezed out, holding Rey’s knives carefully. Rey counted to sixty then dived into the wardrobe and pulled out the weapons and tools she had been able to get in her bags, she used the tape from the med kit to tape them to the underside of her table and chair, it wasn’t a great hiding place, but it would have to do till she found a new one.

Once she was done, she returned the kit to the bathroom along with the small mirror, then washed her face… which made her think of Kylo… she could feel her cheeks getting warm and had to try several times before she could wipe the silly smile off her face.

As she pulled her stupid uniform on, she wondered what happened now, was he her boyfriend? Would they tell anyone or keep it a secret? Did she want to keep it a secret?

She suddenly felt awfully naive and inexperienced... Maybe she she should put some perfume on?

_ Fuck, no. _ This was stupid, she was being stupid. He could take her as she was or not, she wasn’t going to change.

She pulled on her coat, straightened her uniform and went down stairs and out. She was halfway to the refectory when Finn shouted  _ “Peanut!” _ at the top of his lungs, she looked up to see him barrelling towards her, grinning like a loon.

He caught her in his arms and swung her around, ignoring her protests. When he finally stopped spinning, he hugged her to him. “I’m so glad to see you up Peanut! Are you coming to lunch?”

Rey tried not to laugh at him, it was difficult. “Yes, and hopefully by the time we sit down I won’t be dizzy anymore!”

He just smiled at her happily and flung an arm around her shoulders as they turned to walk back the way he had come. “You look much better… Oh and there is a  _ scandal afoot!  _ Or at least, a mystery that no one can solve. Someone or  _ something  _ cut up Kylo Ren’s face!”

Rey blanched,  _ shitting hell, _ “Oh really.” She said faintly.

Finn didn’t noticed her red cheeks, the wind helping to cool them down at least, “Yeah, it’s like a slice all the way up his neck and cheek and eyebrow, he’s telling the teachers he cut himself shaving!”

Rey snorted a laugh,  _ that was the best he could do?  _ She’d had to give up two of her knives! Then she felt instantly guilty, it was her fault after all.

Finn went on, “None of the Knights will tell anyone anything, not that that is surprising, but some people are saying it was a ghost! Like a poltergeist or something, someone said they’d heard the Knights do black magic, which is why they all wear black and maybe a spell went wrong and a demon did it, someone else said Kylo and Hux had a fight and Hux won…”

He trailed off when he noticed the look she was giving him, it was partly,  _ are you a fucking idiot? _ and partly,  _ seriously, how old are you? _

He looked sheepish for a second, then rallied, “Well it can’t have been shaving, can it?”

Rey rolled her eyes, “No, of course not. But I don’t know why anybody even cares.”

They entered the refectory and got their trays, Rey’s stomach loudly reminding her she hadn’t eaten since last night.

“So, where is he?” Rey asked as casually as she could as she chose a sandwich and some fruit… and a muffin, and a yogurt and some more fruit.

“Whoa, Rey, did you not have breakfast?” Finn said and Rey shook her head.

“I accidentally slept through it, I only woke up because Mara came to check on me… So, where is Kylo...Ren?”

Finn’s frown turned excited again, “He was sent to see the nurse and then sent to Mrs. Organa, at least that is what people are saying, I only saw him at breakfast.”

Everyone at Poe’s table was very excited to see Rey much to her embarrassment, the girls got up squealing and hugged her, Poe got up and hugged her, Ismasta did too but held it longer than she was comfortable with, so she squeezed in between the girls to eat, trying to answer all their questions and eat at the same time.

“Okay people, let my Peanut eat, seriously,” Poe said after sixty seconds of end to end questions. “So, have any of you seen Kylo Ren yet?”

Rey was grateful to him for changing the subject, but really wished he could have picked a different subject.

“Not since he was taken out of his first lesson to see the nurse,” Poe said.

“It’s weird though, I mean, obviously he didn’t get it shaving, but he went up to bed last night fine, and then came down with that on his face.” Brobard said.

Shaadr nodded, “I mean I know he’s messed up and stuff but I really can’t imagine him doing that to himself.”

“Yeah, I mean, I know I shouldn’t say this but he is pretty cute, why would he cut his face? It’s the only good thing going for him.” Kenjad said as she picked at her food. Most of the guys looked at her horrified, “What? He is, seriously… and I mean Rey must think so, she kissed him.”

Rey sunk down in her chair as everyone looked at her, wishing the floor would open up and suck her in, dying right now seemed like such a  _ good idea. _

“No, Ken,” Ismasta said and  _ thank the light _ they all looked at him, “ _ He _ kissed Rey,  _ she _ didn’t kiss him.” On the other hand,  _ no, the light could fuck right off _ , this was almost as bad.

“Dude, it doesn’t matter who-” But Brobard was cut off as he saw who was walking up to their table, Rey turned with the rest,  _ oh, of fucking course, _ why had she left her nest? Why, why  _ WHY? _

Hux looked down at her and smiled thinly, “Scavenger, a word.  _ Now _ ”

Rey gave him a withering look, putting all her irritation from the last twenty minutes into it, which turned out to be quite a lot. “ _ Get bent, Hux _ .”

If it were possible, his lips got thinner, “Okay,  _ fine,  _ you can either come and talk to me, or we can talk about the nurse’s office here.” He smiled, it was horribly smug as she scooted out of her chair.

“Peanut? What’s going on?” Finn stood too, looking concerned.

Rey shot Hux a furious look then turned to Finn with a smile that didn’t quite fit on her face, “It’s fine, I’ll be back in a sec, don’t let anyone touch my food.” She said and she walked off to the side of the room where the glass doors were, Hux following.

He stood too close, her blood sang with acid in her veins, “What?” She asked before he could open his mouth.

Hux looked disappointed and sighed, “Not afraid of me anymore? Shame. It’s okay, I can change that.” He lifted a finger to touch her lips and she jerked back.

“I really wouldn’t touch me, if I were you. Unless, of course, you would _ like  _ to lose each and every appendage starting with your dick.”

He just moved closer to her, but this time she stood her ground, they were a breath apart, “Someday soon, you will scream for me,” He said softly.

Rey smiled at him, it wasn’t a nice smile, “I never scream, and there is  _ nothing  _ you could ever do that would make me.”

Hux took a sharp breath in, “ _ That _ sounds like a challenge. I will take it… By the way,  _ why did  _ you stab Kylo Ren?”

Rey didn’t blink, didn’t even blush, she was very proud of herself. “Whatever makes you think that was me? Apparently the Knights summoned a demon, who was  _ pissed. _ ”

Hux studied her face for a moment then shrugged, “Just a theory I had, nevermind. See you later,  _ Scavenger Scum. _ ” And he sauntered off.

Rey took a deep calming breath, she was going to beat the living shite out of him, she was going to wear his skin like a cape and drink milk from his empty fucking skull.

Finn looked at her oddly when she came back to their table chuckling. “What was that about? You didn’t look happy but now you’re laughing?”

Rey grinned at him, “It was Hux, so obviously he was being a dick. I was just laughing about what I am going to do to him.” And she told him, he looked amused but also faintly sick.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo had not gone back to sleep, he changed out of his soaking wet t-shirt, carefully taking it off so as not to touch his face, then he had to...  _ take care of himself,  _ or he would never be able to do any thinking today, and there was a lot of thinking he needed to do.

His orgasm, unsurprisingly, came quickly and left him gasping, the memory of Rey in his arms, wrapped around him, her tongue in his mouth, made him shudder.

He lay on his bed for a while breathing fast, waiting for his heart to stop hammering, then he had a shower, carefully not getting his head or face or collarbone wet, which wasn’t easy.

Then he dressed and went downstairs for coffee… And that is when all the trouble started.

Stold, who he never seemed to see unless he really didn’t want to be seen, walked through the kitchen, face like thunder (though that was normal) then walked backwards through the door to stare at Kylo’s face.

He glared at Kylo, then unnecessarily shouted, “Mara! It’s  _ that boy  _ again!” Then walked out after giving Kylo another filthy look.

Kylo had time for another mouthful of coffee before Mara came in, looked at Kylo, blanched and ran to him, “Whatever happened, Kylo?” She said horrified.

Kylo sighed in resignation, “I cut myself shaving,” He answered dryly. In retrospect, he really should have come up with something better.

Mara gave him a hurt look, as if he’d just kicked Poe’s stupid little cat or something. “Kylo, that is a serious wound! You need to go and see the nurse and you need to tell me what happened!”

Kylo sighed again and gestured vaguely to his face, “I’m fine, see? I fixed it.”

Mara gave him a derisive snort, “ _ Benjamin Solo, _ if you do not do as I tell you, I will go and find  _ your mother. _ ”

Kylo glanced around quickly to make sure no one had heard her call him that, then glared at her.  _ “I am fine. _ And my name, is _ Kylo Ren _ .” He stalked off to the games room so he could kill things, but when he heard the outside door slam he legged it up the stairs instead and woke Ingalan up.

“Blood and bloody ashes Kylo, what happened to your face?” Ingalan said once he’d woken up enough to register it.

Kylo sighed, “I’ll tell you over breakfast, come on.” When Ingalan started to protest Kylo added, “Mara’s on the war path and has gone to find  _ my mother _ .”

“Oh, _ fuck.  _ Fine give me a second.” Ingalan muttered and started to get up.

Kylo barged into the others rooms too, perversely enjoying waking them up- it was usually the other way around.

He filled them in as they hurried to the refectory, chose food they could take elsewhere and went to sit in the workshop to eat as there was no way Han would be up yet.

“So what’s my excuse?” He asked when he was done, “I can’t think of anything other than shaving and that is so obviously bull shit.”

Zainmar shrugged, trying to wipe the grin off his face as he did, “I got nothing. If people hadn’t seen you go to bed looking fine then it wouldn’t be so hard. I suppose one of us could claim it was us, but, it is pretty bad and I have a feeling we might get expelled or something.”

There was a pause then Javiell said, “And you really like her? Even though she carved you up like a side of beef?”

Kylo couldn’t help grinning, “Yeah, I do… and to be fair, I blame Hux.” His grin slid off as he felt anger flush through him.

Leonmar grimaced in disgust, “He has an awful lot to answer for, but I still can’t believe he did that… It’s so fucking creepy.”

They all nodded. “Well, your new girlfriend is seven shades of crazy, maybe she can come up with a good idea for his payback.” Javiell said.

Zainmar laughed, “Yeah Kylo, it’s like she was made for you.”

Kylo smiled, “Yeah, I really think she was.” Then he sighed, “Guess it looks like I am  _ really shit  _ at shaving then.”

They’d barely entered Miss Holdo’s class when Luke came and got him, “Sorry Amilyn, but I need Kylo to come with me.”

She nodded, unsurprised and Kylo picked up his bag and followed Luke, the Knights giving him sympathetic looks as he left.

Once they were out of earshot Luke looked at him with concern, “Ben, what is going on?”

Kylo forced down his irritation at _ that  _ name, if he let Luke get to him now his mother would have a bloody field day. So he shrugged as nonchalantly as he could, “Shaving accident.”

Luke’s lips twitched, but he didn’t smile, “Don’t insult my intelligence, Ben.” 

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Kylo answered blandly, smirking on the inside.

Luke’s eyes narrowed like he knew about the secret smirk, “My problem is, you can’t be afraid of anyone, no one can be bullying you, so you must be protecting someone… But why would you protect someone who had done that to you, Ben? Unless of course you have regressed several years and you did it to yourself, on purpose.”

Kylo kept silent till they got to the nurse, who then repeated it all again as she tended his face. “Well at least you did a very good job with cleaning and binding it. The scar won’t be as bad as it could be, I will give you some Bacta cream to put on it, three times a day and after you wash, though I would advise not getting it wet for as long as you can avoid it. You are very lucky to get away without stitches, young man.”

Kylo tuned she and Luke out, they were just going round in circles now anyway... this was where Rey had been when Hux had… had  _ molested  _ her. Why the hell had Joselor thought it was okay to leave Rey alone with Hux? He’d never liked her, but he  _ loathed  _ her now.

“Ben.” The name was quiet but Luke and Joselor stopped talking and Kylo’s head snapped round to the door.

And there she was,  _ his mother. _ She was tiny but she still made him feel like he was half her size, _ how did she do that? _ He stood up so he could look down on her, but it didn’t make him feel any better, it never did.

She gave Luke and Joselor a tight nod, then said, “Come with me.” And glided off.

Luke almost looked sorry for him, almost.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So I got a bit of fidgety writers block, consequently, this chapter is brought to you by a lot of gin. (Praise be to gin, in all its forms). I’m sorry, sorry, sorry this is a day late. Huge thank you goes to Autonomee for betaing- the gin increased how many mistakes i made by quite a lot and she made this readable!


	37. More Lies

 

 

_ At least,  _ Rey told herself,  _ my poker face is still working, I just need to work on not blushing.  _ But she had no idea how to do that.

The sun was shining as she walked back to the dorm after lunch, and she paused outside to lift her face to it, eyes closed.

It was weak compared to Jakku of course, but it was welcome nonetheless. Once inside, she reported to Mara to let her know she was back. Then, she got some school books from her room and went into the reading room to study. Sadly, because the room faced northeast, there was no sun for her to sit in, but there was a very happy BB8 there. He purred at her like a freight train, head bumping her hands and lying across her books.

Rey took that as a sign that she didn’t need to do work today and sat in one of the armchairs to cuddle the round little cat instead, which he was ecstatic about.

His purring kept making her sleepy, she considered going upstairs to have a nap but BB8 was happily settled and she didn’t have the heart to move him, so she drifted in and out just on the edge of sleep- without Finn there her body wasn’t able to relax enough to completely fall asleep in such a public place, but it was still restful.

Eventually she heard students start to arrive in the dorm, chattering excitedly about the weekend and about their lessons, the cadence of their voices rising and falling depending on the subject matter.

Poe came in and BB8 jumped off Rey’s lap to go and enthusiastically wind himself around Poe’s legs.

Finn followed Poe in and they both sat down with Rey, BB8 held in Poe’s arms, purring even louder than he had for Rey.

“Awww thanks for cuddling my silly ball of floof,” Poe said smiling as he rubbed BB8 in all the right places. “Looks like he kept you from studying though! Sorry.”

Rey smiled, “Cuddling him was infinitely preferable, so don’t apologise.”

Finn drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair and looked at Poe, who nodded, “Peanut… I just wanted to give you a heads up… Ismasta is probably going to make a move on you today or tomorrow.”

Rey blinked at him, and then looked between them both, Finn laughed at her expression, “We tried to talk him out of it, I mean, we’re pretty sure you aren’t interested?”

Rey shrugged uncomfortably and Finn carried on, “Yeah, thought not. You want Poe to have a word with him so he doesn’t bother?”

Rey felt relief pour through her, “Yes please, sorry.” She answered awkwardly. Poe laughed.

“It’s okay… Is there anyone you do like though? Cos there are a few other people interested, you’re new here after all.”

Rey really wasn’t sure what to answer, she still hadn’t seen Kylo…  _ Stars! _ She wanted to see him, and yet she was dreading it too, after all he may have changed his mind, or seen his face in the light and been angry… Though if that were the case wouldn’t he had told people she had done it…?

Rey had no idea. She had paused too long.

“Ooo there is a blush and hesitation! There is someone, isn’t there, who is it? Who is it?” Finn asked excitedly.

Rey glared at him, “Nope. Not telling.”

Poe pouted at that and Finn made a whiny noise, but she shook her head, “Not until I’m sure anyway.”

“Okay, well, be sure soon! Can you at least tell us if it’s a boy or a girl?” Poe said and Finn nodded.

Rey sighed and said, “It’s a boy.” Poe laughed, “Hah! Kenjad and Brobard owe me twenty credits each!” Rey blinked at him in shock, not at the idea of her being into girls, at the amount of money they were betting with.

Finn caught her look and gave her a small eye roll, she returned it and they both chuckled to themselves. “Hey, what?” Poe asked and they both grinned. “It’s an orphan thing,” Finn said, laughing.

Poe smiled, “You two are weird... Anyway, Rey, we are taking you shopping tomorrow!” He beamed at her. Finn gave her a sympathetic look.

Rey looked at Poe horrified and Finn gave Poe an eye roll, “I told you we shouldn’t have told her.” 

Rey rounded on Finn, “Traitor!” Finn just grinned at her. “I’ll be with you Peanut. If it gets too bad we can ditch the others, and I’ll take you to see the fountains or something.”

“Nope. Not a chance in hell I am going shopping. I haven’t ever been and I am not starting now.” Rey said.

Poe shook his head looking confused, “But, how did you get clothes and stuff?”

Rey looked at him for a second, waiting for the penny to drop, when it didn’t she shrugged, “I was a  _ scavenger, _ Poe. I found, made or was given stuff… or sometimes I’d pike it.”

Finn laughed and Poe looked shocked and confused, “What does  _ pike it  _ mean?” Rey smirked, but Finn answered, “Pike it, like nick it?” Poe still looked nonplussed and Finn pulled him in for a cuddle, squashing BB8 a bit, “She stole it, Poe.”

Poe looked embarrassed which made Rey laugh, he gave her a firm look and shrugged it off, “You can’t back out on shopping though cos the girls are so excited, it would break their hearts and they’ve been hoping you’d be feeling better enough to go.”

Well that wasn’t fair! Now she felt guilty, Finn patted her knee, “It’s okay, we’ll leave if it gets to be too much, Peanut. I promise it will just be a couple of hours anyway.”

“Hours?” Rey almost cried, “How long does it normally take?”

“Oh, all day usually.” Poe said laughing at her, “Seriously, you’re getting off lightly!”

Rey just shook her head, how did it take so long to buy clothes? It was madness. Perhaps she would just hide tomorrow, they’d never find her in Kylo’s room…  _ Where was he anyway? _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

His mother led him to her office. She had a classroom and an office, one for teaching and the other she used as her counselling room. Kylo hated that room, it was always too warm and it had lots of annoyingly calm pictures on the walls with revoltingly saccharine quotes about being  _ ‘good to yourself’ _ and  _ ‘hanging in there’ _ ... It made him want to punch things.

She gestured to the other chair as she sat in her own, he dumped his bag on the floor and folded himself into what he suspected was a purposefully uncomfortable chair. He wondered if she only brought it out especially for him.

She looked at him in silence for a few minutes, studying him as if she were looking at a machine and wondering how it worked.

Finally she spoke. “Obviously that did not happen shaving. Why don’t you tell me what  _ did happen. _ ” It was less a question and more a demand, Kylo sighed and rolled his eyes, only on the inside though.

“I was shaving, I slipped. I didn’t think it was a big deal.” He answered looking at the corner of the room instead of at her.

“ _ Ben. _ ” She said, but he didn’t fall for it and she made a small vexed sound. “Clearly you aren’t self harming again, or you would have done it somewhere out of sight. So this says to me that someone else did it, why would you be protecting them?”

Kylo clenched his fists, breathed out, “Have you seen Han lately?” He asked, hoping that would piss her off.

But she carried on as if she hadn’t heard him, “Mara mentioned it had been very neatly cleaned and bound, I remember you being rather ham-fisted in your past attempts at dealing with wounds.”

Kylo ground his teeth together,  _ bloody Mara. _ “Ben, this is a serious wound, I cannot let this go.”

“It was an accident, I can promise you that.” He finally grated out.

She sighed, “You are so like your father.” He finally looked at her, glaring, her eyes met his easily, unflinchingly and he was the first to break the contact.

“I could place you in detention till you are ready to tell me the truth.” She said in a musing voice. Kylo really was going to punch something any second now. “I am telling you the truth when I say it was an accident.”

He caught the movement of her head as she tilted it to regard him, rather like a bird sizing up a worm.

“Okay.” She conceded graciously, “I believe you. But you need to tell me the rest. The implication is that someone in the dorm has a knife,  _ a weapon _ and that cannot be allowed. And I have yet to see how such a wound could be an accident, though I do believe you when you say it was.”

Kylo snorted, “There are knives in the kitchen. Anyone can take one.”

“Not the sort of knife that would have done that.” She gestured at his face. “You will have a scar, a large one for the rest of your life. I don’t think you understand the implications of that, Ben.”

He closed his eyes briefly, “ _ My name, _ is Kylo,  _ not Ben. _ ”

Her lips thinned, “I named you Ben when I gave birth to you.  _ You are my son  _ and I will call you what I please.”

Kylo stood up angrily and paced the few feet from wall to wall, an idea trickled into his mind and he almost slapped his forehead, not believing he could have been so dense.

_ “Fine.” _ He said keeping his angry tone. “It was fucking Hux. He’s… He’s interested in my girlfriend and was trying to warn me off, he was only trying to scare me but got carried away.  _ Are you happy now? _ ”

He had the pleasure of his Mother looking surprised, then was shocked as she gave him a small smile, “You have a girlfriend?”

_ Really?  _ That's what she was going to focus on? _ For fuck’s sake. _ He shifted his feet, realising he may have jumped the gun a little, “Yeah. Sort of, it’s not official yet.” He muttered, cheeks flushing.

If anything she looked amused now, “Who is it?” He gave her a horrified look, “ _ I am not _ telling you that and you can’t make me.”

She smirked at him, “Fine. I will speak to Armitage and get Mara to search his room. But this is still serious Ben. Are there any witnesses?”

“Yes, Ingalan and Javiell saw, Ingalan taped me up, Zainmar and Leonmar saw me afterwards.” He needed to get to them soon, or this would all go to shit. His mother nodded, making a few notes on a pad in a neat flowing script.

He hoped that would be it but she wasn’t done with him yet. “Luke tells me you pulled a girl out of the swimming pool last week and gave her CPR, that you saved her life.”

Kylo shrugged as casually as he could, “So?” This was uncomfortably close to talking about Rey.

“She was lucky you were there.” She said in a voice so neutral that he had no idea what she was thinking, then again, he seldom did, but it was rarely anything good.

He shrugged again, “If I hadn’t been there someone else would have done it.”

She just responded with a loaded, “Hmmm.” And tapped her lips thoughtfully.

“Can I go now?” He asked irritably. “No, Ben. We need to talk about your grades...” She said, pointing at the bloody chair again, Kylo sighed and sat, this was going to be a long morning.

~~~

His mother finally let him go towards the end of lunch, he was sure she had done that on purpose just to spite him. He made it to the refectory in time to grab a sandwich and fill the Knights in, all of whom agreed that they were all idiots for not thinking of blaming Hux earlier. Sadly there would be no opportunity to plant a knife in Hux’s room, but it seemed plausible that he would get rid of it after using it to slice someone’s face. At least his rivalry with Kylo and the Knights was well documented.

Apparently Rey had just left when Kylo arrived and he didn’t have time to go after her, fill in the Knights and eat something.

It was annoying, but he had to wait. Then he was kept behind for some minor infraction during Maths and he got back to the dorm later than he’d hoped.

He’d got to about fifty feet of the dorm when he suddenly felt nervous, _ how was this going to go? What if she had changed her mind?  _ He pushed the thoughts down, took a deep breath and pulled open the door, of course he’d have to find her first, hopefully she was downstairs. He’d only got halfway through the common area when Hux was suddenly in his face.

Kylo couldn’t help smirking, Hux was absolutely furious, it was beautiful. “What the fuck do you think you are playing at telling that stupid counsellor woman I cut your face? If I was going to cut you, I’d do so much more than that.” Hux stabbed a finger in Kylo’s face, almost spitting in rage, his pale eyes burning and spots of colour high in his cheeks, “ _ You are so fucking dead, Ren. _ ”

Kylo almost laughed, this was too good, he noticed Mara was walking towards them purposely, and she must of heard Hux’s last sentence. 

“Armitage, you were told to stay away from Kylo. Unless you want to spend your evening in the lobby with me watching you, I suggest you disappear.  _ Now _ .”

Kylo kept his face as unexpressive as possible as Mara turned to him, with a level look, “If he causes you any problems,  _ tell me _ , do  _ not  _ use your fists. Is that understood?”

Kylo nodded his head and she accepted it with one of her own, then waddled back out, following Hux.

Kylo didn’t know where the Knights currently were, but he needed to see Han, it would probably be a good idea to get some locks off him for their rooms, just in case. He turned on his heel and went straight out again, heading for the workshop. 

It was like the universe was trying to keep him and Rey apart. He snorted in disgust at himself, he’d seen her less than twenty four hours ago, and he’d see her tonight, before of after lights out,  _ he would see her. _

  
  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: For some reason, Leia ended up like an Aes Sedai (Wheel of Time) without the channelling. *Shrugs* ...Also this is rather a ‘filler’ chapter, sorry!


	38. What Are We Now?

 

 

Rey popped upstairs to change out of her uniform, and once she was back in sensible clothes she added a squirt of Nightbloomer then went downstair to play cards with Poe and Finn.

They taught her to play something called Poker, but after several games they stopped because they kept losing- both their faces were so expressive she knew what cards they had, it was just too easy.

So they sat around talking with the others, Maritan insisted on doing something to Rey’s hair, it felt so intimate but Finn had given her a meaningful look when she had opened her mouth to tell Maritan to stop so she had shut up, though not before giving him a glare.

Rey actually weirdly started to enjoy the feeling, Maritan brushed it for a while first then started doing some sort of complicated style. Rey kept an eye on the dorm door, hoping she’d see Kylo walk through but she still hadn’t seen him by the time they decided to go to dinner.

As they stood up to leave she raised her hand to pat her head to try and work out what Maritan had done but Jess swatted her hand away, “Oh no, don’t touch it, you might pull it out by mistake, wait till you can look in a mirror, you look totally cute.”

_ Cute? _ That had never been a word she would associate with herself, nor was it one she’d want to. Kenjad laughed when Rey let out a sigh, “We’ll make you into a girl yet, Rey-Rey.” She said as she linked an arm through Rey’s. Rey gave her an eyeroll.

“Rey, could I talk to you alone for a minute?” Ismasta asked as he came alongside them,  _ shit, _ had Poe not talked to him?

The girls gave him amused, knowing looks then walked briskly ahead, leaving Rey alone with him,  _ oh blood and bloody ashes, _ she was not equipped to deal with this kind of thing.

Ismasta took one of her hands and pulled her to a stop, facing her.

He gave her a soft smile and she was just trying to work out what to say when he leaned in and just kissed her, after a few seconds of shock she pushed him away from her,  _ ewww no, no, no, no, no!  _ She was careful not to push him roughly, but she pulled her hand out of his, “Err, Ismasta, I’m sorry but, I’m not, err.. “ She trailed off uncomfortably, not knowing what to say without insulting him.

“But Rey, you haven’t even given me a chance!” He said, almost angrily, “Just let me kiss you properly, I know it’ll make you change your mind.”

Rey took a step back, hands up in front of her, “Sorry, Ismasta but.. You’re just not my type.”

She was fairly sure that was the right phrase.

“But you said before you don’t know what your type is!” He said in a loud, frustrated voice.  _ Light  _ this was so awkward! How did she explain without being rude?

“Is there someone else then?” He asked before she could think of a suitable answer… But that was another question she didn’t know how reply to.

He narrowed his eyes, “I saw Hux talking to you at lunch, someone said he claims he’s kissed you. Or is it  _ Kylo Ren _ ? Everyone saw him kissing you last Saturday. Either one is bad news Rey, but  _ I’m not.” _

Hux was telling people they’d kissed now? What the shit?  _ She was going to cut his heart out with a fucking spoon.  _ She pushed her anger down enough to address Ismasta politely, “I am sorry, but even if I don’t know what my type is exactly, I know what it is not, and you are not...It. Also, Hux is a fucking twat.” With that she quickly walked away, hoping he wouldn’t follow, she ground her teeth when she heard quick steps coming after her, then smiled in relief when she saw Finn coming back towards them.

“Rey, wait, we need to talk about this.” Ismasta caught up with her and grabbed her arm, Rey was swiftly coming to hate him.

“No, we don’t. There is nothing to talk about.” She said as Finn reached them. Ismasta turned to the other boy, “Finn, can you please tell her? She won’t even give me a chance.”

Finn raised his eyebrows at that, “Sorry Ismasta, but if she isn’t interested, she isn’t interested.”

Finn took Rey’s arm and they started walking away, Finn was muttering an apology to her when Ismasta shouted, “You’re a fucking tease! Scavenger bitch!”

Rey flushed, angry and embarrassed at the same time, then had to grip Finn’s arm to stop him from turning back. “Let it go, Finn, foul words are but foul wind, and that is currently all he has.” She said as she pulled him along.

The tension went out of his body at that and he fell into step with her normally, “Sorry Rey, we didn’t get to him in time. I didn’t think he’d be such a dick about it either.”

Rey shrugged, keeping a lid on her anger. This place, this school was so much more effort than Jakku, everything in the desert was black and white, no one bothered about feelings or morals or worried about such trivial things. In Jakku you worried about food, safety, shelter, simple things. She shook her head at herself when she realised that part of her actually missed her old life. It was madness, but still true.

“Is there anything you fancy doing this evening?” Finn asked as they walked, in a forcely cheerful voice. “Swimming and wide games are out cos you’ve been ill, and I think the movie room is booked up too so that leaves games or just hanging out. At least there is the Firepit tomorrow, but we’ll have to wrap you in a scarf and hat and stuff to make sure you don’t get ill again.”

Rey snorted, “That’s only if I survive shopping.” She muttered sullenly.

Finn chuckled, “You never know, you may end up liking it!” He said as they went into the refectory. Rey gave him a withering look.

As they sat down at the table with the rest of Poe’s friends, they hushed a little and gave her odd looks. Finn looked around at them, “What?” He asked as he dug into his pile of… Rey wasn’t even sure what he had, it was rice and then…. Just orange stuff with bits in.

“Hux has started a rumour that he and Rey are  _ involved. _ ” Kenjad stage whispered.

Rey closed her eyes and rubbed her temples, maybe she could walk back to Jakku?  _ It would only take her about a year,  _ unless she hot-wired a car, which of course she would, afterall it was her speciality.

Finn snorted then coughed as some food went down the wrong way, Poe patted him on the back. 

Did Rey tell them the truth or lie? If she admitted that he had kissed her when she was half asleep then he would either look creepy or it would just look like she was lying, or what was it Ismasta had said? Being a tease. On the other hand if she denied it, it may somehow come out later and then she would be seen as a liar. And she’d already told a lot of lies recently, she knew you had to pick and choose your lies carefully, otherwise they’d fall apart and you’d get whatever it was you were trying to avoid that much worse.

She stabbed a piece of chicken viciously with her fork. “ _ We are not involved.  _ But Hux did kiss me. I told him to go fuck himself, but apparently he didn’t understand what that meant.” She said sardonically.

Finn started choking again and everyone else gaped at her. She was too angry to blush, Jess was the first one to get her wits back, “What the hell do you mean Hux kissed you? How? When?”

Everyone leaned towards her, Rey figeted in her chair, “When I was ill in the nurse's office, Joselor left him to watch me sleep as she had to run an errand, he kissed me as I woke up.”

Maritan gasped and put her hands over her mouth in horror, “But that is awful!”

Finn glared, “Is that why you were in such a hurry to get back to the dorm? And why he spoke to you at lunch?” Rey nodded, still stabbing things on her plate instead of eating. “Can we please talk about something else now?” Rey asked, she just wanted everyone to stop looking at her like she was some kind of victim.

“Ugh, Hux is such a creepy douche!” Kenjad said and everyone nodded. Rey suddenly lost her appetite, she pushed her plate away and stood, “Actually, I’m not hungry, I’ll see you guys in a bit.” And she walked away quickly, but not before she heard Brobard say, “Wait, where’s Ismasta?”

And that was another topic she really didn’t want to be around to talk about. She heard Finn start saying something but stopped listening straight away, she didn’t want to know and right now she really didn’t care.

Rey didn’t go to the dorm but turned right instead and headed towards the gym, she really didn’t want to bump into Ismasta again or anyone else for that matter, and her muscles were twitchy from lack of use, she pulled her hood up as she wandered aimlessly around the edge of the East field.

As she started to bear back to the west she heard a galloping noise and looked up, Chewie came bounding out of the gathering darkness, tail wagging madly in greeting.

Why couldn’t people be more like animals? She rubbed Chewie’s ears and he gave her a happy groan, then took her coat sleeve delicately in his mouth and tugged, rolling his eyes at her as he did so. “You want me to go with you?” She asked out loud, his ears went back as he smiled and wagged his tail, “Okay.” Rey said and he let go and trotted off, pausing every few steps to make sure she was still following him.

Unsurprisingly he took her to the workshop, there was a light on inside so Rey decided now would be a good time to ask Han for that door lock.

Chewie led her through the workshop to an open office doorway, she could see Han sitting in a battered leather chair talking to someone out of sight. Rey hovered in the darkness, unsure whether she should interrupt but Chewie trotted back to her and pulled her by her sleeve through the doorway.

Han looked up as she got there, “Oh, hi kiddo what’s up?” He said unsurprised to see her, “Chewie, let her go you daft lummox.” Chewie gave him a long suffering look then sat, rubbing his head on Rey’s hip, making her almost fall over.

“Have a seat or you’ll fall down, you know Ben, I mean Kylo, right?” Rey blinked and turned to see Kylo sitting on a sagging brown leather sofa, looking very uncomfortable.  _ Was he uncomfortable because she was there and he was wishing she wasn’t or because the first time they saw each other was around a teacher? What should she do? _

Chewie took her choice away, he leaned into her, pushing her towards the sofa and she almost fell onto it, he immediately rested his head on her lap, as if he knew she would have jumped back up if he hadn’t.

Rey suddenly realised she hadn’t answered Han yet and tried to remember what he had said “Um, sorry to bother you but Chewie seemed to want me to come here, I’m sorry I didn’t come on Monday for the lock, would it be possible to get one now though? Please?”

Han chuckled, “Yeah, I think Chewie’s rather smitten with you. Sure I’ll go get a lock now, I heard you were ill, you all better now?” Rey shot him a nervous smile, “Yeah, I’m fine, thanks.”

Han got up and disappeared into the darkness of the workshop, Rey could hear him banging around and muttering to himself as he went.

She found she couldn’t look at Kylo, she was too afraid she’d see anger or rejection on his face and right now she really couldn’t bear that. He hadn’t moved or spoken during her exchange with Han, and Rey had no idea what that might mean.

The silence was loaded, the air almost seemed to ripple with tension, then something touched her right hand making her jump slightly, she turned her head to see Kylo’s hand hovering a few inches away from hers, without looking at his face she moved her fingers to lightly touch his, then snatched them away as soon as they touched, it had felt like she’d got a shock of static electricity. Only one or two seconds later though his hand was enveloping hers and she closed her eyes briefly in relief.

His skin was so warm! It almost felt like he was pushing heat through his fingers into hers, it traveled up her arm and into her chest, a pressure she hadn’t realised was there disappeared and she let out a small relieved sigh.

Their hands separated as they heard Han coming back in, “Is a straight door bolt okay with you, Scavenger?”

Rey smiled, “Yeah, that’s perfect, thanks.”

“I’m lending Kylo some tools, you can borrow them too.” He said as he handed her the lock and six screws.

Rey smiled, “That’s okay, I’ve got my own.” She said as she put them carefully in her pocket.

Han raised his eyebrows but nodded, then said, “Okay you two, off you go, Chewie and I have plans.” 

Rey smiled and said thank you again as she left, she heard Kylo pause and mutter something but didn’t catch what, Han laughed.

Chewie saw them off, escorting them to the door then watching for a few moments, eyes almost glowing, before going back inside.

Rey and Kylo walked in silence till they got out of sight of the workshop, then suddenly she was in his arms, his mouth hot and frantic on hers as he pushed her up against the wall of the Music and Drama building.

Static seemed to crackle across their skin as they touched, Rey lost time, the world shrunk down to his burning lips, his warm hands, his breath.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Han’s reaction to Kylo’s wound was very different to his mother’s. Han had clapped him on the back and said it would appeal to girls once it was healed, offered him a beer and they’d sat and talked about his mother, lessons and how long the wound may take to heal.

To Kylo’s surprise Han had offered him dinner and even more surprising, he’d stayed, enjoying the beer, pizza and Chewie’s heavy head on his knee.

Then Chewie had returned from for what Kylo had just assumed was a loo break, towing Rey behind him.

At the sight of her his chest had suddenly frozen in fear, she looked tired and sad and he had been deathly afraid that it had something to do with him.

She hadn’t even looked at him, and he’d thought it was over again, before it had properly begun. Then Han had disappeared to get her a lock too,  _ why did Rey want a door lock? _ And he’d built up the courage to reach out and touch his fingers to hers, she’d jumped as if repelled by his touch, but when he was about to be crushed by despair she had reached out and touched his fingers. A spark seemed to jump between them shocking him for a second, then he had grabbed her hand with his, her fingers cold and perfect in his grasp. And it felt so good, just that small point of contact.

When Han turfed them out, he’d held off as long as he could before grabbing her and kissing her as if she had been away from him for a year or more.

Her hands were in his hair, he held her face as they kissed, her back against a wall, his body against hers, and everything was perfect in that instant, static crackled over them like tiny lighting strikes, it didn’t matter, nothing mattered in that moment, and they spun it out as long as they could.

Voices pulled them apart, he led her behind some trees, he went to kiss her again but she pressed her hands against his chest, just enough to keep their lips from touching.

“There are some things we need to talk about.” Her breath against his lips made him dizzy but he nodded, and pulled back from her a little more.

She didn’t speak though, she frowned in concentration as she softly traced just beside his wound, the static that had been crackling over them, through them, seemed to concentrate at her touch, his cut suddenly feeling cold and hot, searing, it lasted for a few breaths, then was over. He looked down at her, her eyes were wide and she slowly grinned up at him.

Kylo flexed his jaw and realised his face felt… different. “What just happened?” He asked in a whisper, unsure why he didn’t talk normally.

Rey shrugged, “I have no idea,” She whispered back, “But you should go and look in a mirror soon.” Suddenly she looked enormously smug.

It faded quickly though, “Have you had dinner?” Kylo nodded, “Okay, shall I meet you in your room once curfew starts?”

Kylo shook his head firmly, “ _ I’ll meet _ you in  _ your room _ , you’re still getting better, you shouldn’t be scampering across roofs at the moment.”

Rey raised an eyebrow at him, “We have it well established that I am better at  _ ‘scampering’ _ than you are.”

“I will agree with you there, but you have been ill,  _ really ill, _ I can feel your legs trembling even now.”

Rey glared back at him but then sighed, “Fine, okay.” And he grinned, grabbing her hand to lead her back onto the path but she tugged him to a stop.

“I’m not sure we should be seen together yet.” It was Kylo’s turn to raise his eyebrows.

“Are you embarrassed about me?” He asked jokingly, but feeling a flash of hurt inside.

Rey rolled her eyes at him, “No. But we need to… talk about some things before we tell people.” Kylo was about to argue then remembered his Mother and Hux. He sighed in resignation, “You’re probably right. Okay, do you want to go first? I’ll go around the gym first so I come from the other direction.”

Rey smiled at him and went up on her tiptoes to kiss him lightly, but he pulled her to him again, kissing her till she was gasping against him before letting her go with a smug chuckle.

There was a promise of pay back in her eyes, and honestly, he couldn’t wait.

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry, kind of more filler… also I had a really, really shitty day today (Friday). So this chapter is brought to you by Whiskey and a migraine. (The path of my life is strewn with cowpats from the devil's own satanic herd.)


	39. It’s All Conjecture

 

 

Rey pulled her hood up as she walked, her steps light The night air was cold but she didn’t really care right now. There were few people about, it was still a couple of hours till curfew but the cold seemed to have driven most people inside.

As she walked her stomach reminded her she hadn’t eaten much dinner so she decided to raid the dorm kitchen to see what it contained. So far she had only had tea, but she remembered Finn saying there were snacks available.

Rey soaked in the silence as she approached the dorm, making the most of it while it lasted. She took a deep breath and smoothed her expression as she opened the door and stepped inside, pulling her hood down as she stepped into the noise and light of the common area.

Finn and Poe were sitting where they had earlier, Finn sitting where she had been, watching the door. He shot up when he saw her and came over quickly, “Are you okay, Peanut?” He asked, concern on his face, Rey gave him a reassuring smile, “Yeah, I’m fine. Hungry though, can you help me look for snacks?”

Finn nodded and gave a little wave to Poe before going with her to the kitchen. “You were gone a long time, Peanut, I was worried.” He said quietly, as they entered the empty kitchen.

Rey hugged him, it was an impulse that surprised them both, though she stepped away quickly. “I just needed a walk and some quiet.” She said and he nodded, understanding. “So what’s good to eat?”

Finn smiled, “It really depends what you like and how hungry you are! There is fruit, yogurt and milk for cereal in the fridge. There are different types of bread related things in that cupboard.” He pointed to one and then another, “That one holds every cereal you can imagine and oats for porridge. And these three are dried fruit and nuts, crisps, chocolate, cake and cookies.” He gestured to some others. “There’s a toaster and a microwave and then there’s all the hot drinks stuff, oh and there is juice in the fridge too.”

Rey had a rummage in the cereal cupboard, but there was too much to choose from and it hadn’t been anything she’d eaten before, “What would you recommend, Finn?”

Finn shrugged, “Depends on your taste, do you want sweet or savoury?”

“I have no idea, I’m just hungry.” Rey said unhelpfully. The concept of choosing what to eat was still something she was getting used to, in Jakku you ate what you were given or could take.

Finn pulled out a box and pulled out a few pieces for her to try, Rey made a face as she chewed and shook her head, “It’s too sweet.”

Finn laughed, “Okay, savoury it is.” And he pulled out some… blocks? Of something from a box, put them in a bowl and poured milk over them, then handed it to Rey with a spoon. The block things soaked up the milk and started to lose their shape, and she doubtfully stuck the spoon in and tried some. It was still quite sweet to her taste and somewhat bland but it would fill a hole nicely and she finished it quickly, leaning against a cupboard as she ate.

Rey grabbed an apple before they joined the others in the common room, as she went to sit down she felt.. _something_ and turned towards the door, Kylo was just walking in, Rey looked away quickly and sat down.

“What happened to your hair?” Maritan said with a pout as Rey sat, putting her coat on the floor. _Crap,_ had Kylo mussed it when they had been kissing?

“Sorry, it must have been knocked when I put my hood up.” Rey answered as contritely as she could, then bit into her apple. She noticed Ismasta wasn’t among the group and wondered uncomfortably if his absence would be permanent.

“Well I’ll just have to do it again,” Maritan said while Rey had a mouthful of apple and was unable to respond.

Rey sat quietly, watching the others play poker, amusing herself by working out who was bluffing and who was not while secretly enjoy Maritan playing with her hair again, though what the point of doing the style again when she was going to bed soon was lost on her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo dawdled on his way back to the dorm so as to give Rey some time to get in and settled before him, as he approached the building he could feel… _something_ , like there was something calling to him, or as if part of his body was already there and he were catching up to it.

As he entered the common area he realised with a jolt that it was Rey he was feeling. He did his best not to look at her and quickly made his way through the room, into the kitchen and up the stairs to the top floor.

The Knights were all in Leonmar’s room as it was closest to the stairs, the door open so they would see anyone who came up.

“Where the hell have you been?” Zainmar asked as they looked up from their card game.

“Sorry,” Kylo said as he dug out the door locks and tools he’d got from Han and put them on the floor as he sat down. “Loads of stuff happened. I got these for each of our rooms in case Hux feels the need to come up while we’re out or asleep... He is not happy with me right now.” Kylo couldn’t help grinning at that, the others looked amused too.

Then Ingalan frowned at him and leaned in closer, “Shit Kylo, what happened to your face?”

Kylo frowned, “It got sliced, remember?”

They all leaned in to look at him more closely, “Yeah, obviously, but it now looks like it happened a month ago, not last night.” Ingalan said, confusion in his voice.

“What?” But then Kylo suddenly thought of Rey’s smug smile and her suggestion he look in a mirror. He got up and walked quickly to the bathroom, the others following behind.

It was impossible, and yet the mirror couldn’t lie, his face had a pink, neat and narrow scar running up it where the open wound should have been. He pulled the tape off it with hands that trembled slightly, there really was no need for it now.

He pulled his shirt down and looked at his neck and it was the same. “Guess it wasn’t as bad as it looked,” He muttered.

The others gave him disbelieving looks and he sighed, he couldn’t keep things from them, it wasn’t right. “Let’s put the locks on the doors, and I’ll explain after.” They slowly nodded their agreement, confusion writ clear across their faces.

The locks were easy to fit, there were hasps and staples for the outside which they could lock with a padlock and straight door bolts for the inside.

Once they had finished they congregated in Kylo’s room, he was suddenly nervous as they sat and looked at him expectantly. _Where did he start? And what did he say about the bits he didn’t yet understand?_

“I think... Rey healed my face.” He said finally. “I don’t know how, I don’t even think she knows how, but there is like a… force, something that connects us, it’s like electricity or… I don’t know… but I think I can feel her, downstairs. I don’t understand what is going on, but I think we belong with each other… I know that sounds dumb.” He shrugged, “But look at my face.” There was a silence, then to his astonishment they just shrugged or nodded. “You believe me?” He said, his voice incredulous.

Zainmar laughed, “Maybe, I don’t know about all of it, even you don’t seem to, but we can’t deny the evidence on your face, Kylo. And we know you wouldn’t lie to us.”

Kylo blinked, smiled, but it slipped when he remembered something else, “We’ve also been having really similar dreams... And then, you know when I fell out of bed on Sunday morning? It looks like we were in the same dream, _at the same time_ … I even had a dream where I got this.” He gestured to his face, “It was in exactly the same place, and I dreamt of it a week before I got it… Only in the dream Rey did it with a sort of sword, not a knife.”

 _“Well shit.”_ Leomar said.

“I know.” Kylo agreed.

“And you’re sure this isn’t like, some crazy coincidence?” Javiell said.

“Pretty sure, unless someone is spiking the water or food here.” Kylo said. Zainmar laughed, “Well none of us are having weird dreams, so I guess not. You’ve not been taking magic mushrooms or anything?” Kylo snorted and shook his head.

“It sounds like a bloody sci-fi book.” Javiell said, and Kylo had to agree. “I know. We haven’t had a proper talk about it yet, I’m going over after curfew later.”

Zainmar waggled his eyebrows, “ _Oh really._ ” Kylo mock punched him in the shoulder. The others chuckled.

Ingalan touched Kylo’s arm, “While you were out, we overheard some rumours. Hux is telling people he and the Savenger are involved. And Ismasta made a move on Rey and was rejected and is now telling everyone she is a tease. He seems to have defected from Poe’s group to Hux’s.”

Zainmar made a disgusted noise, “I never liked Ismasta, and I have no idea what the hell Hux is playing at.”

Kylo tried to push down the anger that was coiling in his gut. “Hux kissed Rey.” He admitted through gritted teeth.

“ _What the fuck_?” Zainmar and Leonmar said in unison, then smirked at each other.

“For reasons known only to herself, Joselor left Hux to keep an eye on Rey while she was sleeping in the nurse’s office. He kissed Rey while she was semiconscious.” Kylo explained.

Ingalan grimaced in distaste, “That’s despicable.” He said and Zainmar nodded adding, “ _And so desperate._ ”

Kylo felt a shudder go through him as he remembered Rey’s description of the encounter.

“It has to be cos he wanted to piss you off.” Javiell said, then cocked his head, “Though... he has seemed to be somewhat... _obsessed_ with her since she beat him up.”

Ingalan nodded, “Maybe you should keep the fact that you are together quiet for now?”

Kylo sighed but nodded his agreement.

“And we still haven’t planned out revenge on him for the lie he told Rey.” Zainmar added, “Unless you wanted to leave it just with the knifing thing?”

Kylo gave him an evil grin, “What do you think?”

They laughed, “No. He deserves much more than that.” Javiell said, “We can take our time, get it right.”

“Exactly.” Kylo said.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey went upstairs well before curfew, she fitted the lock to her door, then tidied her room and straightened her nest.

She had forgotten Maritan had done her hair until she went to the bathroom to clean her teeth and wash before lights out.

Her hair was up in a braided sort of bun thing, teased and soft, from the neck up she looked incongruously girly next to her scruffy jeans and t-shirt. She left it as it was, unsure how to undo it without making her hair a knotted mess.

When she got back to her room, Rey decided to stay dressed rather than change into the giant t-shirt she slept in, Kylo would be dressed after all.

She cracked the window, then sat on the floor and tried to read, but she couldn’t concentrate on the words, so she contemplated her revenge upon Hux instead.

She drifted off into fantasy, until she felt a pull inside her mind, her head jerked up to look at the window but there was nothing there, but something was coming… she realised it must be Kylo. She could sense him, _feel his presence getting closer_ , and she got up to open the window fully, seconds before his legs descended to stand on the sill.

Rey took a few steps back to give him room to enter, he shut the window gently, then took her head in his hands, kissing her softly, slowly.

The heat built between them, Rey could feel something _hungry_ awakening inside her, heat flaring between her legs as she ran her hands up inside his t-shirt.

He mirrored her until his fingers came into contact with the bandage on her side. He pulled back with a frown on his face, “What’s that?” He asked her as his fingers went to pull up her t-shirt.

Rey pulled it back down, away from his questing fingers, “Nothing.” She insisted and tried to reach up and capture his lips again.

He held her back, still frowning down at her, refusing to be sidetracked. “Did someone hurt you?” _Damn_ , she had hoped that as he hadn’t noticed last night, he wouldn't notice at all. No such luck it seemed.

Rey sighed, “No. Honestly, it is nothing.” But he wasn’t buying it. “If it’s nothing you won’t mind showing me.”

Rey considered tackling him onto the bed or floor, he shifted his position as if he knew what she was thinking and she glared at him. “ _Fine_ .” She said and lifted her t-shirt briefly before dropping it again. Kylo rolled his eyes, grabbed her wrists in one hand and pulled her t-shirt up with the other, his long fingers deftly pulled the bandage aside and he looked up quickly at her, “Rey, this was done with a knife. _Who did this?_ ”

Rey ripped her wrists out of his grasp and folded her arms defensively. “I did.”

Kylo blinked at her in confusion, “What do you mean?”

Rey sighed and sat on the bed, “I mean, I did it. To myself.” He sat down next to to her, body angled so he could look at her face fully. He still looked confused so she irritably pulled her t-shirt up again and showed him the neat line of scars running down her side.

His eyebrows pulled up as comprehension dawned on his face. “Why?” Was all he got out. Rey shrugged uncomfortably. “They are reminders, lessons I’ve learnt that I don’t want to forget. Sometimes punishment. It’s just something I do, it doesn’t matter.”

Kylo ran his fingers lightly over the oldest scars and she shivered, dropping her t-shirt. “But what is that one for? You must have done it since you got here.” He asked her softly.

Rey couldn’t look at him, “I did it on Sunday morning.”  She heard him take a sharp breath in, felt the anger and guilt her words incited rise inside him.

He pulled her to him, tucking her against his body, wrapping his arms around her, she rested her cheek against his chest, felt him plant a kiss on her hair. “I’m sorry,” He whispered.

“Don’t be.” She said, “It was my fault for believing Hux. Not yours.”

“I am going to kill him.” He whispered against her hair and she found herself smiling, “Not if I kill him first.”

They stayed like that for a while, listening to their heartbeats. Eventually Kylo broke the silence, “I hear Ismasta made a move and wasn’t happy when you rejected him?”

Rey pulled away, “Ugh, yeah. He didn’t take it too well. Apparently I’m a tease.”

Kylo snorted, “He is such a dick.” Rey nodded, “Yup… Also I don’t know if you’ve heard but Hux has been telling people we kissed.”

Kylo growled, “Yeah _I heard_... I got grilled by the school counsellor about my face and told her Hux had done it.” He grinned and Rey laughed delightedly.

“Brilliant.” She said.

“Speaking of my face… How did you do that?” He asked her.

Rey shrugged slightly, “I’m not entirely sure, but that energy we felt? That… I don’t know I sort of, pushed it? Or moulded it into your wound, almost like I gathered the energy and light and… I’m still not sure. And, I think I can.. Feel you now? Like I knew you were on your way here and I think I sensed you before you got into the dorm earlier… This _connection_ seems to be getting stronger.” She trailed off.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo nodded in thought, “Yeah, I think I can feel you too… Can I try something?”

Rey nodded hesitantly and he lifted her t shirt up and pulled the bandage off her cut completely, held his hands over it and tried to push as she had. He couldn’t seem to get a handle on what she said she had done, but instead he felt something else, the energy surrounding them, flowing between them, so he pushed that, forcing some into her body.

Her back arched suddenly and her head went back as she gasped, he stopped instantly, afraid he had hurt her, but he could still feel her pulling something _from him,_ all on her own now.

Her body was held taut, like a drawn bowstring, “Rey!” He said frantically, and shook her gently, then more firmly as she didn’t respond.

To his relief she gasped again, then straightened, panting slightly, she looked at him with wide eyes, “What _was that_?” Kylo shook his head, “I was trying to heal your cut, but I think I did something else, I’m not sure. Are you okay?”

She nodded, “Yeah, I think so. That was weird, but I feel… _good_ … Strong. It’s odd.” She lifted her t-shirt to find her cut fully healed and scarred over. “You did it!” She grinned at him.

But Kylo shook his head, “I don’t think I did, I think that was you… but I think you were drawing… _power?_ From me to do it. Or I helped make the connection.” Kylo sighed in frustration. “I wish we knew what the hell was going on. We’re treading blindly here. We could end up hurting each other accidentally.”

They sat in silence as they contemplated his words.

Eventually Rey asked, “What are we?” Kylo blinked at the change of subject, “It’s up to you, but I don’t think we should make it public till the Hux thing has calmed down.”

Rey laughed, “No, idiot, I meant what _are we_? As in, is it magic? Are we… Human?”

Kylo felt his cheeks warm slightly but he laughed quietly, “Whatever it is, it isn’t _magic_ and I’m pretty certain I’m human, both my parents are anyway…” He trailed off, feeling instantly guilty, as if he had been boasting of having parents.

But Rey just nodded, “I’m pretty sure mine were… Oh by the way, Mara came in this morning and saw the blood you’d dripped on my face so I had to show her my cut and said I’d made a mess cleaning that up. Apparently I have to see the counselor.”

Kylo put his head in his hands and groaned, she was going to see his Mother? Blood and bloody fucking ashes!

Rey’s hand tugged at his arm, “What’s wrong with that?” Kylo looked at her, should he tell her? Maybe not yet, she wouldn’t understand the knotted snarl of their relationship.

“Well, she knows about my face, I told her Hux did it. But then when you see her, she’ll find out you had access to a knife and bloody bandages in your room the morning after I got cut…”

Her expression turned considering, “Ah, yes I see the problem… Though, how on earth would we have encountered each other to fight after curfew? Surely Hux doing it sounds more likely, even with the coincidence of Mara catching me?”

Kylo nodded slowly, “Perhaps… You’ll have to be careful with Leia… I mean Mrs Organa. Also, when I said Hux had done it, I told her he had been warning me to stay away from you. I may have said you were my girlfriend.” He looked down as he said it, away from her face, suddenly embarrassed but not sure why.

“Oh really?” Her tone made him look up to find she was smiling at him, cheeks a little pink.

“You don’t mind?” He asked hesitantly.

“I think I can live with that.” Her teasing inflection made his body flush with heat and he pulled her to him roughly, eliciting a surprised squeak from her as he hungrily took possession of her lips, hands going straight under her t-shirt, skimming her waist, caressing her skin as he slid his tongue into her mouth.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Kind of more filler type stuff, but they have a lot of stuff to deal with, should be more happening 41 on wards.  
> .  
> Sometimes chapter titles come to me and they are perfect, a lot of the time though i spend ages trying to work out a good one, I don’t particularly like this one, but couldn’t think of anything else. It is annoying.  
> Autonomee is my Beta and is bloody wonderful. (check out her new fanfic, Niima, if you haven't already).  
> Thank you so much for all your comments <3 you are awesome


	40. Past The Point Of No Return

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: There will be smut...

 

 

**** Rey was lost in the sensations that Kylo’s mouth and hands flooded her with, his ability to addle her mind and body almost frightened her. She had never been in a position where surrendering was okay, last night she’d been tired and so elated over their reunion that her brain hadn’t even registered her submission.

Kylo must have felt something of her confusion because he pulled away to look her in the eyes, a slight frown on his forehead. “Are you okay?” He asked hesitantly, brushing a thumb over her cheek.

Rey gave a little embarrassed shrug, “I’m just not used to…  _ feeling _ like this… I know we aren’t sparring, but my instincts are telling me that I’m...  _ losing _ .”

There was a pause as she looked down, but glanced back up as Kylo chuckled at her, it was a dark, seductive sound. He took her chin in his hand and grazed his thumb roughly across her lower lip. “As much as I’d like to spar with you right now, it would probably cause too much noise. But perhaps another time?  _ Winner takes all? _ ” 

Rey shivered at the thought, her chin still in his grasp, “I will take that as a yes.” He said with a slow smile. “For now, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. You can be in control if that would make you feel more comfortable, or I’d be more than happy to hold you down, if that would be easier?” His voice had gone very low, almost a growl and Rey couldn’t stop a small gasp escaping her.

He bent to slowly kiss her neck, “So,”  _ Kiss, _ “What will it be,” _ Kiss, _ “My little,”  _ Kiss _ , “Scavenger?”

_ Little Scavenger? _ With a growl of her own she shoved him in the chest so he fell back on the mattress and scrambled on top of him, pinning his arms with her knees.

He grinned up at her, totally relaxed, even looking somewhat smug. She leant down to slowly kiss him, regretting she hadn’t thought to get his t-shirt off before doing this. She trailed her kisses down his neck till she found a nice bit of muscle, and then she bit him. 

Rey had always been proud of her canines, they were quite pointed and sharp and very good for biting. She was careful not to bite too hard, but she didn’t do it softly either. It didn’t matter, Kylo seemed to like it, a lot. He hissed then groaned as she sucked and licked the area, then bit him again, his hips jerking slightly beneath her. She rose so she could see his face, his pupils were wide, far wider than just the low light would have made them. 

Rey took his bottom lip into her mouth, sucking it gently, watching his face as he closed his eyes, his spine arched a little, then his hips ground against her, though she didn’t think he knew he was doing it.

She released his arms, “Take off your t-shirt.” She said, surprising herself by how husky her voice had gone.

He started to and she helped him, pushing him down as he tried to rise to a sitting position. She stroked his chest with light fingers, surprised again how soft his skin was over such hard muscle, unmarred by hair except a little around his nipples and a line leading down from his stomach button into his trousers. She ran her fingers through that line, stopping where it cut off. She wasn’t brave enough to follow it yet, so she turned her attention to his nipples, they were already hard and she swirled her tongue around them, nipping them every now and again, enjoying the sounds that came from Kylo’s mouth each time she did. His skin felt so good under her hands that suddenly she wanted to feel it against her own, she sat up, the movement of her hips causing him to gasp, and she pulled her t-shirt off, followed quickly by her sports bra.

He looked up at her, eyes wide and breath coming in small pants, she could feel his hands twitching, desperate to touch her, and she couldn’t help smirking down at him, delaying touching him, building his frustration.

She slowly lowered herself till her torso was flush against his, his freed hands came up to caress her waist as she met his lips with her own, his kiss almost rough with need. She was hyper aware of the contact of their chests, her nipples hardening against his hot skin.

They kissed till he pushed her away slightly, and looked intensely into her eyes, “ _ I want to touch you. _ ” He said, his voice rough, sharp edged with need.

Rey frowned down at him in confusion, “Aren’t we touching right now?”

But he just shook his head and shifted till he had a hand between them, he reached down and cupped her between her thighs, just the unexpected warm pressure of his hand through her jeans made her hips jerk and she was surprised to hear a desperate sound fall from her mouth.

He rubbed her slightly, her skin flushed with shock and her blood boiled with desire, as she gasped.

“ _ Please, _ ” He whispered in her ear, his hot breath tickling her, he rubbed her again and she made a strangled noise but jerked her head in a nod, past caring, past the point of no return.

Kylo turned them so she was lying on her back and he was propped up on an elbow looking down at her, he undid her belt one handed and undid her zip, but rather than carry on he brought his hand up to cup a breast, squeezing firmly, rolling her nipple between his fingers. Rey didn’t feel her control slipping away, it was just gone. She arched her back, pushing her breasts into his hand, and he slowly trailed his fingers down her stomach, leaving trails of fire as he went, dipping his head to take one of her nipples in his mouth, sucking softly.

Then his fingers were slipping inside her underwear, and she suddenly understood the distinction of his words,  _ now he was touching her. _

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo felt almost drunk with lust, yet he had still managed to ask her permission, gain her consent. Then he took control, her body hot and pliant.

The moment his fingers made it into her underwear he could feel the tension in her body, but she didn’t tell him to stop.

A whimper escaped her as he finally touched her. Her sex burned like it was on fire, and she was wet,  _ deliciously wet, _ he could feel his mouth watering as he gently caressed her, stroking up and down, feeling her body tremble, hearing the small noises she made.

He wanted to take a nipple in his mouth but he wanted to watch the expressions on her face more, watch how her body responded to his touch, commit to memory every expression, every sound she made.

He slowly started to rub her clit in slow circles and her eyes flew open in shock, he’d barely started when she came, biting her own wrist, to muffle the noises she was making, her breath stuttering, body shuddering.

“Wha… What was that?” She asked, still breathless, twitching.

Kylo raised his eyebrows, “Don’t tell me you’ve never had an orgasm before?” Her flushed cheeks went darker. “I don’t know what that is.” 

Kylo closed his eyes briefly. “Have you never… done that to yourself?” He opened his eyes again to see her face as she answered, “No… Is that normal then? That happening?”

Kylo desperately wished they’d been somewhere where he could have heard her, where she didn’t have to keep quiet.  _ I just gave her her first orgasm _ … 

No wonder she had broken so quickly, “It is normal, don’t worry.” He said kissing her lips gently, then smiled down at her wickedly as his fingers started moving again. She gave a startled “Oh!” at the resumption, body already quivering.

Kylo’s erection was painful, straining against his jeans, hot and stiff, if he wasn’t careful he was would just come in his pants. He did his best to ignore it, it wasn’t important right now.

As he continued rubbing her clit, he slipped a finger further into her skin, finding her entrance, and just before she came again, he slipped his finger inside her, pushing as gently as he could. He couldn’t help groaning himself as he felt how tight and wet she was, he thrust gently while she came, prolonging her orgasm, the movement of her jerking hips taking his finger deeper inside her, everytime it looked like she was coming down he rubbed her clit and she’d go over again. He did this several times before he took pity on her and slipped his hand free of her underwear.

He watched in satisfaction as she twitched beside him, wrist back in her mouth, making such  _ sinful _ noises. When she opened her eyes to look at him, he held her stare and slowly stuck his glistening fingers in his mouth and sucked them, a moan escaped him as he tasted her.

To his amusement what he was doing made her body twitch again, her eyes wide and shocked.

He took his fingers out of his mouth and kissed one of her nipples, delighted when her over sensitised body made her shudder at the simple contact.

He tortured her a little more, kissing her breasts and neck, running his fingers over her ribs, but then he relented and lay still and watched as she slowly regained her equilibrium. As her body returned to normal, he could see her growing sleepy, languid in the afterglow.

He leaned down and grabbed some pillows and a cover off the floor, and tucked her in next to him, pulling her against his chest.

She murmured sweetly, drifting off even as she snuggled against him, he had to concentrate very hard to will his erection away. With her lying against him, the scent of her skin and hair enveloping him, it was difficult but he managed.

Eventually he drifted off, with her right there in his arms, a smile on his lips.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**~~~~~~**

 

**Sensation take me,**

**Drown my soul,**

**Give me oblivion.**

**In the dreaming universe**

**Pour me,**

**Crush me,**

**Grant me my extinction.**

 

**~ Fyodor Tyutchev**

 

**~~~~~~~**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I’m not 100% sure this chapter should be here, don’t know if it’s too soon or too much I wasn’t expecting such smut, but Kylo got carried away… (Bad boy).
> 
> Sorry it is rather short… I had ‘Radioactive’ by Imagine Dragons in my head for most of this, then a bit of Phantom of the Opera- ‘Past The Point Of No Return’, which is also the chapter title…
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	41. But Soft, What Light Through Yonder Window Breaks?

 

 

**~~~**

_ And when the dawn breaks, the sun will come and take you away  _ __  
_ but I wish that I could stay in this moment, my whole life.  _ _  
_ __ ~ This Moment by Miette Hope

**~~~**

 

Rey surfaced from sleep slowly, she was very warm and lying on something strangely soft. A faint noise and hot breath against her neck turned out to be Kylo snoring quietly.

And there was something hard and burning poking her in the back. She wriggled to try and work out what it was and Kylo moaned in his sleep, the arm he had around her tightened and his hips pressed more closely against her… _ Oh.  _ Rey felt her face heat as she realised what part of his body she must be feeling.

He made another sound, one of satisfaction as his hand came up to squeeze a breast, and she realised they still had their jeans on but they were both topless.

Rey felt like she should reciprocate for what he did to her last night, just the thought of what his hand had brought her made her squirm. But she had no idea what to do or how to do it…

And the sky was getting lighter.  _ Damn. _

She turned to face him, which was quite difficult because his arm around her was ridiculously tight. His face was soft, beautiful and she took a few moments to just look at it before kissing him tenderly to wake him up.

He muttered softly then pulled her to him even closer, kissing her back even though he was pretty much still asleep. The hard heat at his groin pushed against hers and she gasped against his mouth at the contact and he opened sleepy, surprised eyes, then smiled at her.

“Mmmm, good morning.” He said quietly as he pulled her back to kiss her again, making her head spin. She giggled as he kissed down her neck, then gasped again at the contact of his hips against hers.

“ _ Oh. _ ” He said, his cheeks flushing as he became aware of what he was doing. He pulled his lower body back from her slightly, and her disappointment surprised her. “Sorry.” He muttered, looking a little embarrassed.

Rey laughed quietly. “Don’t be.” She answered and kissed him again, “But, if you want to be able to leave before this evening, I’m afraid you have to go now.”

Kylo sighed in resignation but nodded. “One day soon, I am going to take you somewhere where we can’t be interrupted and we don’t have to leave for a least twenty four hours,  _ and  _ we can make as much noise as we like.”

Rey shivered at the thought, then slipped out of bed, her skin instantly pebbling as it hit the cold air making her shiver again for different reasons. She quickly pulled her t-shirt on and stretched as Kylo got up and did the same then pulled his shoes on.

“Can I see you later? Before the firepit?” He asked as he opened the window to leave.

Rey shivered even more at the blast of cold air, “Sure… The others are making me go shopping with them this morning though.” 

Kylo smirked at her disgruntled expression, “Rather you than me. We could meet after lunch? Say, three o’clock by the back of the refectory?”

Rey nodded, melting inside a little as he kissed her before disappearing out of the window.

She sighed happily as she shut out the cold air, able to feel as he moved away from her back towards his room.

She went off to have a shower, blushing all alone as she undressed to find what a mess her underwear was in,  _ was that normal? _ She may need to have a talk with Jess about some things or see if she could find a book or something, she felt terribly naive. 

Once she was clean, she rummaged through her meagre drawer of clothes to pull out the smartest things she owned. They were not much better than everything else, slightly less tattered, slightly less worn. The idea of going into clothing shops was slowly starting to panic her.

Once downstairs she made herself tea and sat with it in the reading room, breathing in the steam and trying to calm her nerves.

_ This was stupid, _ it would be horrible, but she should _ not _ be scared by it. Happily BB8 arrived to distract her, he sat on the arm of her chair, purring then plopped onto her lap, seconds after she had moved her tea.

“ _ Well, well, well. _ ” Rey looked up to see Hux leaning in the doorway to the reading room. “The early bird does catch the worm, it would seem.” He drawled.

Rey glared at him, BB8 went still and quiet on her lap. “Off you fuck, Hux.” He smirked and walked slowly towards her. Rey shifted in her seat, “What part of that did you not understand?”

He tutted at her, “This is part of the common area, I have every right to be here,  _ Scavenger. _ ”

Rey took in a silent, calming breath. “Fine. Then sit down and shut up, this is meant to be a quiet room.”

Hux sat opposite her, mouth still quirked in amusement as he folded his long legs and settled back to stare at her.  _ He was insufferable. _ “You look much better, almost…  _ glowing.. _ . I hear you upset Ismasta yesterday.” 

Rey didn’t dignify that with an answer, she smoothed her features as best she could and took a sip of her tea, absently stroking BB8 with her other hand. 

“Of course, I had to inform him of my prior claim,” He carried on, seemingly unperturbed by her silence. “I hear you are going shopping today. You should get a red dress, it’s my favourite colour and you wear jeans too much,” He tilted his head in a considering way, “In fact, you should probably just burn all the clothes you have.”

If BB8 wasn’t on her lap and she were not holding a hot cup of tea which may scald if some spilled on the little cat, she would have strangled Hux by now.

Rey stayed silent, as she studied Hux, if she were going to skin him,  _ where would she start? _ Her slow smile seemed to make him a little uncomfortable. Of course, if she were to skin him she wouldn’t touch the area under his underwear.  _ Should she start from the feet and move upwards?  _ Or would he have died from shock before she got to his face?

And when she was done, would she do anything with the skin? She wasn’t sure, on one hand it would be gross but on the other it would be a reminder that she had won.

Eventually he asked, “What are you thinking about?”

Rey smiled even wider, it looked like she was getting  _ under his skin _ … She couldn’t help chuckling a little to herself.  _ Which would disturb him more?  _ Telling him what she was thinking about or not saying a word? 

He leaned forward, lips thinning in irritation, but before either of them could say anything, Poe bustled into the room, smiled when he saw Rey, then frowned as he noticed Hux.

BB8 positively sprang off Rey’s lap and she shot up behind him, gesturing Poe to turn around as she quickly made her way to the door.

“See you later,  _ Scavenger _ scum.” Hux called after her. Rey didn’t look back.

“Are you okay, Rey?” Poe asked as they went quickly to the kitchen so he could feed BB8.

“ _ Ugh _ , yeah, but thanks for coming in when you did.” she answered gratefully.

“He really can’t seem to leave you alone.” Poe said as he poured dried biscuits into a bowl for a chirruping BB8 who danced around his legs, tail quivering.

Rey shrugged, “One of these days I will teach him a lesson he won’t soon forget.” She muttered. And she would, but she must plan it carefully, wait for the opportune moment.

“Well, I’m glad you were there, Hux has been known to kick BB8.” Poe said unhappily.

Rey’s gut clenched in anger, now understanding why BB8 had gone so still and quiet on her lap.  _ “That shit fister!”  _

Poe nodded. Finn bounced into the room, “Peanut!” He beamed at her, and Rey couldn’t help smiling in response. “All ready for shopping?” He asked as he went to kiss Poe.

Rey’s smile slipped into a glare. “As ready as I’ll ever be.” She muttered.

They headed out for breakfast, “Don’t worry, we’ll make you look amazing” Poe said, as if that would make her happier.

Rey frowned, “I like how I look now.” He raised his eyebrows, “No offence, Rey but… all your clothes look like they were once men’s, they’re too big for you _ and _ they are full of holes… and those boots,  _ girl, _ I can’t even.”

“Can’t even what?” She asked as he seemingly didn’t finish his sentence, both Poe and Finn chortled at her confusion.

“It means he couldn’t find the right words to express his feelings.” Finn said still chuckling. Rey shook her head, the students at Canto Bight  _ were weird. _

They had only just started in their breakfast when they were joined by a very animated Jess, Kenjad and Maritan. “Rey! Are you excited?” Jess asked when Rey had just taken a mouthful of something called a croissant, she wondered if Jess had timed that on purpose.

Kenjad laughed at her expression, “So, we need to make a list of all the things you need. First up, you need bras, every girl should have at least eight but we’ll start you on two.” She paused as Finn banged Rey on the back as Rey choked. _ Eight? What the hell for? _ “And you need tops, and jeans and jumpers and some shoes and boots. Oh and we need to get you a dress for the  All Hallows Eve Dance next weekend.”

Rey felt her expression grow mulish, she took a sip of juice, then said succinctly, “I am  _ not _ , wearing a dress.”

The girls all pouted in sync, “But everyone else will be!” Maritan said in a wheedling tone.

“Oh really? The boys too?” Rey asked smugly, then smirked at their expressions, “I thought not. If they aren’t, then neither am I. Also I will not wear anything pink…” She said firmly, “ _ Or red _ .” she added as an afterthought.

“Oh, but you’d look really good in dark red.” Maritan insisted. Rey grimaced. “Apparently, it is  _ Hux’s  _ favourite colour.”

“Ewwwww! Say no more.” Kenjad said and the other two agreed looking suitable disgusted. 

 

As they were walking to the small car park that was situated at the front of the school, Jess said, “Oh, by the way, I got your allowance from Mara for you, Rey.” Rey blinked, she had totally forgotten. “It seems you had a lot left over from the money that was set aside to get you settled, so we have quite a bit to play with.”

Rey groaned, “Two hours. Two hours, then I will leave, even if it means walking back.”

  
  


  
  


  
  
  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry it is so short, super busy ><
> 
> Thanks so much for the feedback on the last chapter <3 
> 
> Also, holy shit biscuits this is over a 100,000 words now. This is crazy.
> 
> Massive thanks to Autonomee for being the best of Betas <3 and for all of you who’re still reading ^_^


	42. New Clothes And New Threats

 

 

As they hopped off the school bus, Rey took in the shopping centre with slowly dawning horror. The Galaxy Centre was a huge, hulking mass of glass and steel, ultra modern and ultra shiny. Kenjad and Jess grabbed her hands as her steps came to a stop, pulling her along with them as Rey turned to peer over her shoulder at Finn and Poe, who were trotting quickly after them, grinning like idiots at her expression. Everywhere there seemed to be beautiful, well groomed people, and all the shops looked like she shouldn’t even step foot inside, let alone browse or try things on. Places like this just did not exist in the desert.

_ It’s just two hours, it’s just two hours, it’s just two hours, _ a voice babbled at the back of Rey’s head as she looked about her, wide eyed and almost panicked. 

Everywhere was brightly lit, there were no shadows for her to lurk in, no shade to melt into. This was like some kind of personal hell.

The first shop they went to was called Fantasie, and apparently Jess had made an appointment,  _ Why did you need an appointment for shopping? _

Rey soon found out, apparently, you had to be poked and prodded and measured before you could find a bra. It was humiliating and Rey’s fists itched all the while the assistant assessed her, tutting to herself at Rey’s scars, frowning at her old sports bra and tatty clothes.

Rey was so eager to leave she pretty much let the sales assistant and the other girls pick her bras. She ended up with four. But it didn’t matter, she got out quickly and stood for a few seconds, breathing carefully as the others trailed behind her.

Finn put a comforting arm around her shoulders, “That was probably the worst part, you should be okay now, Peanut.” He said softly, Rey just glared at him.

The next shop they stopped at was huge, it felt like going in to the belly of a beast. It was full of a bewildering choice of every type of clothing Rey could ever have conceived of, and some she hadn’t.

The three girls turned into a mini cyclone with Rey at the centre, they’d dart off and return with an offering and argument as to why Rey should try whatever it was they were showing her, then give it to one of the boys to hold, even when Rey said no, and they would dart off again.

Poe kindly steered Rey into a section that seemed full of simple things, and Rey had a rummage herself, “Can I not just buy boy’s clothes?” She asked at one point, but they all turned and said, “No!” In unison, very firmly indeed.

So Rey picked out some plain t-shirts with long sleeves to combat the cold climate, simple jeans, and a few hoodies that were mostly without a pattern or motif, she kept to dark greens, blues, greys and blacks.

Once they got to the changing rooms, they piled in to one large one (the boys stayed outside) and she was ordered to strip and put on a new bra so she could try things on.

Rey had to grudgingly admit that the new bra was nice, there was more support and more shape at least. Then she submitted to trying things on, though there were some things she outright refused to, other things she was actually quite pleased with. Jess had found a heavy leather biker style jacket, which Rey fell in love with and put immediately on the yes pile.

The simple t-shirts Rey had picked out were fitted, which Rey wasn’t massively happy about but they went on the yes pile. The girls allowed her one pair of plain jeans, then she was made to try on ‘pretty’ ones with embroidery or beading and ‘sexy’ ones, tight with artful rips, lace inserts and the like.

Rey discarded all the ‘pretty’ ones but kept two of the supposedly sexy ones. One pair was black with leather inserts, buckles and lacing. The other was black as well, but had large brown leather panels and a detachable leather hip pocket with studs,  _ they would have been good for scavenging. _

Rey also accepted: a soft dark turquoise v-neck blouse, gathered in at the waist with ties at the back to pull it in, it did up with a long line of dainty buttons. A black top that was plain save for the long sleeves and neck were made of see through black net, the sleeves gathered at the cuffs. A high neck long sleeved top in a plum colour that had a cut out in the shape of a teardrop that ended just above her cleavage. A super soft cowl neck jumper in dark grey. And a wrap around black tunic top with lace sleeves and v-neck.

Then she was manhandled into a dress. Maritan had found a metallic plum lace dress that they pointed out could be worn over black leggings and a vest top. Rey glared at herself in the mirror and shook her head. “I look ridiculous.” She said flatly.

“Nuhuh!” Kenjad said emphatically. “You look gorgeous.” Maritan said, fluttering her hands in front of her. But Rey shook her head. “ _ Nope _ . Not gonna happen.”

“Finn!” Yelled Jess, and shoved Rey out through the curtain, Rey yelped in surprise, then glared at Poe and Finn who were laughing, “Oh, Peanut.” Finn said, Rey wasn’t sure whether he was commiserating or admonishing. Poe shook his head, “No, that doesn’t work, hold on, I’ll be back in a sec.” And he trotted off.

Rey stalked back into the changing room and hauled the dress off her and tried on the hoodies she had selected, she chose one that zipped up and was plain black with some white contrast stitching, and a pull over that was in blue and green.

Then Poe was back and Jess went out to see him, there was a brisk whispered conversation and an approving noise from Jess who came back in holding something behind her back.

“Okay, Rey. I will make you a deal. If you try this on with your eyes shut, then you can go into the men’s section and get two t-shirts.” Rey didn’t even hesitate, afterall Jess wasn’t saying she had to  _ keep  _ whatever it was, only try it on. “Done.” She said, feeling like she was getting a bargain.

She stripped down to her bra and pants, now rather desensitized to being so bare in front of the others.

Something cool and silky fluttered over her head, she had to be helped into the straps and she felt the folds of the material settle around her hips and feet. It was a bloody dress.

Maritan making a soft squee noise and the other two made Oooos of delight. “You can look now.” Jess said smugly and Rey opened her eyes.

She stared at herself in shock, she was in a full length dress, it started off a dark fuchsia then deepened as it went down, the shift was so gradual that Rey couldn’t work out where the change occured, it had a slight shimmer as it caught the light. It was fitted, the neck low but not scandalous, and hugged her meagre curves, somehow accentuating them, then flared out above the knee, the hem asymmetric and artfully ragged.

Rey turned to look at the back, it was high but had a narrow slit down the centre that ended just before her brand. 

“So?” Jess said grinning, bringing Rey back to the room. Rey felt like she ought to protest, yet when she opened her mouth all that came out was, “Are you sure it looks okay?” 

The girls all laughed delightedly, “Oh my stars, yes Rey-Rey!” Kenjad said ecstatically. Maritan sniffled,  _ was she crying?! _ “You look so beautiful!” She said and Jess nodded, “It was like it was made for you, go show Poe! He found it!”

Rey shyly emerged from the changing room, Poe gave a low whistle, looking self satisfied and Finn’s jaw dropped. “Holy shit, Peanut, you look amazing!” Rey shifted awkwardly, but couldn’t help smiling a little. “Thanks, Poe.”

Poe grinned wider, “What can I say, I’m just a genius.” Finn smiled at him, “And he’s so modest too!” Rey laughed as she went back to the changing room. The girls helped her out of the dress then piled all the things voted yes into two baskets.

Rey practically skipped ahead of everyone into the men’s section, she picked out three black t-shirts, one with a design of white rib cage and pelvis on the front and back, one with what looked like a galaxy in blues and purples and one that was plain on the front but had large wings on the back in metallic silver. She also secretly snagged a pair of men’s jeans too.

Maritan persuaded her to get a pair of soft cosy looking pyjama trousers and Jess helpfully found some leggings Rey could wear instead of tights and a black leather belt, with a subtle embossed pattern on. Then Finn insisted she get a hat, scarf and gloves, they found a black  soft wooly set, with fake fur accents on the ends of the scarf and on the hat as two pom poms that almost looked like ears.

As they stood waiting to be served, Rey looked uncertainly at the amount of things they’d collected, “Jess, I can’t have enough credits for all of this surely?” She said awkwardly.

Jess laughed, “Trust me, you’ll be fine. And we’ll have enough for new boots and maybe some shoes too.” Rey could only shake her head,  _ who the hell was it that had brought her here? And why? _

Finn and Poe effectively became their pack mules and followed behind as Rey was taken to a shop that seemed to be just full of shoes. She automatically gravitated to what turned out to be the men’s section but was hauled away, protesting.

They discovered quickly that Rey could not walk in women’s shoes, at least anything that didn’t have a wedge, chunky low heel or were just flat.

Rey managed to find a chunky black leather pair of boots that were decidedly un-girly but still in the women’s section, the girls grumbled about this but Maritan pointed out that at least they did have a two inch heel, making Rey smirk to herself in triumph.

They did get her to try on a few daintier shoes, insisting she could not wear the boots with her dress. Eventually they decided on plain black satin shoes, they had pointed toes and a delicate black strap with a simple diamante buckle and with a tapered heel wide enough for her to walk in comfortably. Then they produced a pair of brown soft leather boots, that were amazingly comfortable and would go well with the jeans that had the brown leather panels on. After that Rey insisted their time was up, pointing out to their surprise, (and actually her own) that they had been at this for almost four hours.

As they were heading out of the shopping centre, Kenjad suddenly shouted, “No! _ No, no! _ We must go back! You don’t have a bag or accessories or jewellery!”

Poe looked at Rey’s face and shook his head at Kenjad, “Choose one of those things, Ken. One shop and you have twenty minutes.” He turned to Rey as she was about to protest, “We have to wait for the bus till then anyway, Rey.” Rey’s shoulders sagged but sighed and nodded her reluctant agreement. 

Poe and Finn were left with everything as the girls almost ran back into the shops. Jess, Kenjad and Maritan arguing over which shop they should go to.

They decided to go to the nearest one, as they’d have more time and they pulled Rey into the shop. They scattered and zoomed around at high speed calling Rey to them when they found something they thought she’d like or would go with something she had just bought.  Rey didn’t like anything they showed her and was aimlessly wandering around when a necklace on a display in the corner caught her eye, it was a delicate choker with two silver chains, the lower one had a horned moon charm, patterned on the ends and in the middle. The designer was called  _ Forage and Find _ … that pretty much meant scavenger. Rey smiled as she picked it up.

“Ooo, that’s nice. You should get it!” Jess said peering over her shoulder. Maritan skipped up to look, “Yes! That’s pretty! Also it would go well with this bracelet.” She pulled Rey over to another display, to show her a thin silver bracelet, it had moonstone beads spaced evenly around it and had a small patterned star charm dangling from it.

“Okay.” Rey nodded and they went to the till before anyone could suggest she needed more, even so, Jess slipped in some silver hair ornaments just as the sales assistant was serving Rey.

Rey glared at her but nodded when the shop assistant asked if she wanted them, they matched the moonstones on the bracelet… _ Oh hells teeth, what was she turning into? _

As they hurried to the place the school bus would pick them up from, Rey felt a sudden prickling on the back of her neck, back in Jakku that feeling had meant she was being watched, being followed or about to be jumped. She paused, her hands missing the weight of her staff, her body tensing as she looked around as casually as she could. She was surrounded by strangers, yet none of them presented an obvious threat, she looked for any anomalies among the well dressed shoppers and smart, quick stepped store employees, nothing… then she caught a flicker of movement around a corner, a flash of dark desert tanned skin… “Rey! The bus is here already!” Jess called back to her. Rey shook herself and trotted quickly to catch up. She was being ridiculous, it was nothing, as she settled into her seat, her stomach made a very angry noise at her and she forgot about the feeling, shaking her head at her stomach instead, she was becoming used to regular meals it seemed.

 

After lunch and when Rey had delivered her new things to her dorm room, she suddenly remembered she was meant to meet Kylo.  _ Shit. _ It was 3pm now, she had been planning on a nap but she dragged herself downstairs and through the common area.

“Peanut, do you want to watch a movie with us?” Finn called as she was just about to leave, she turned as he came up to her. “That’s okay, I’m just going to have a little walk then I’ll probably go and have a nap, but thanks.”

Finn frowned, “Sorry, I’d forgotten you were ill so recently, it’s weird, you look so well now. Do you need me to come with you?” 

“No, that’s okay, I’ll be fine. Go cuddle up with Poe, I’ll see you in a bit.” Rey patted his arm and left quickly, jogging as she tried to make up the time, she hated being late.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo went back to sleep when he got back to his room and slept late, his heated dreams full of Rey. He’d forgotten to look his door and consequently was woken up by Zainmar flinging the curtains open and poking him in the ribs.

He glared at Zainmar’s silly grin, “What?” He growled, trying to will his erection away before it was noticed.

Zainmar smirked, “Good night last night? You’ve overslept, as usual. It’s almost eleven.”

Kylo smiled as he remembered he was meeting Rey at three. “Okay, fine, I’m getting up.” He grumbled as he sat up, keeping the covers over himself as he did.

Zainmar smirked again as if he knew why,  _ which he probably did _ , then sauntered out, closing the door behind him. Kylo rubbed his eyes and made his way covertly to the bathroom to shower and give himself some much needed relief.

Once he got downstairs he found the others in the games room and he went into the kitchen to grab some coffee before sitting down to join them.

He felt the need for two cups so he drank his first leaning against a cupboard. Hux and his lackeys came in on their way through, but Hux paused when he saw Kylo.

“Looking forward to this evening,  _ Ren? _ ” He asked as he moved closer, his minions flanking him like the faceless, mindless drones they were. Kylo shrugged nonchalantly, “As much as anyone else, I’d imagine.”

Hux smirked, “Shame your chance with the Scavenger came to nothing in the end.”

Kylo smiled back, gritting his teeth, “Oh, I wouldn't say that.”

Hux looked delighted, “Oh,  _ trust me _ ... You know I’ve tasted her?” He said silkily, “And I’ve  _ touched her, _ and soon I’ll do more than that,  _ Ren _ .”

Kylo took in a deep breath and put his coffee cup down, Hux’s eyes gleamed as he watched him, certain of his safety, surrounded as he was by his friends. He did not understand Kylo at all it seemed.

Kylo snapped his arm back and sucker punched him in the jaw, he avoided the nose and eyes as they bruised more obviously.

Hux went sprawling back and would have fallen if he weren’t surrounded by his lackeys, he was caught by them, reeling, face pale with fury, eyes burning in his face as he lifted a hand to move his jaw back and forth, wincing in pain.

“If you don’t fuck off right now,  _ Armitage _ , I will break you. I don’t give a shit about your friends.” Kylo said softly. Hux’s spluttered, inarticulate in his anger and Kylo added, “And I’d advise you to leave the Scavenger _ alone. _ ” Kylo poured himself some more coffee. “She’d probably break you too.” Hux drew himself up and came at him, Kylo smiled in anticipation but they were interrupted by Mara.  _ “Armitage!”  _ She barked, “I will not tell you again, you are to leave Kylo alone. If you can’t behave you won’t be allowed out to the firepit this evening.  _ Now _ , get out of here!” 

“But Mara,  _ he punched me _ !” Hux said, incredulous that he would be told off.

“I don’t care if he punched you, how many of you are there?” She gestured at the group around Hux and then to Kylo on his own, hemmed in by them. “Now get out!”

Hux left muttering to himself and his followers, all of them glaring over their shoulders at Kylo and Mara. She let out an irritated sigh as the last one disappeared, then turned to Kylo. “Are you okay, Kylo dear?”

Kylo blinked in surprise,  _ Kylo dear? _ Generally Mara hated him, what an odd turn of events.  _ And _ he had gotten away with punching Hux. This was turning out to be a very good day.

He kept the smirk off his face with an effort and nodded, “I’m fine, thank you.” She nodded absently as she studied him, “What happened to your face?” She asked as she frowned up at him. Kylo shrugged, “I guess it wasn’t as bad as it looked.” Mara raised her eyebrows at that then shrugged herself. “Well that at least makes the act less serious, we were having trouble establishing what happened and deciding a suitable punishment.”

Kylo frowned,  _ how vexing,  _ but just nodded. “Well, you come to me if you have any more problems…” She said kindly then bustled off.

Kylo went to join the others in the games room, thoughtfully sipping his coffee,  _ something _ had to be done about Hux, the beast inside, which surprisingly hadn’t raised its head during the altercation, awoke in his chest as he thought over what Hux had said.  _ Soon I’ll do more than that… _ Did that mean he expected to win Rey over or something more...  _ sinister?  _ Knowing Hux it was something more sinister. Had he mentioned the firepit to remind Kylo of the mess he had made of the last one, or because he was planning to do something this evening.

Perhaps it would be best, _ safer,  _ if he and Rey made their…  _ relationship?  _ Public. He filled the Knights in on the incident as they sat in the games room, and as they walked to the refectory for lunch they tried to work out what Hux could be planning.

“I think you are right, going public would make her unavailable, Ismasta and Hux aren’t the only ones who are interested, even Phasma Captain’s been asking around to see which way she swings.” Inagalan said.

Leonmar laughed, “Now _ that _ is something I would pay to see!” The others chuckled, Kylo just rolled his eyes.

Zainmar nodded once they’d quieted, “To be honest, if Kylo hadn’t, I may have made a move.” He held up his hands as Kylo turned to glare at him, “Calm down, I was just saying it as an example. She is kind of fascinating... exotic, you know?”

Kylo grudgingly nodded, feeling even more sure he and Rey shouldn’t hide anymore, even if she  _ was _ going to see his mother on Monday… People needed to understand Rey was unavailable, that she was _ his....  _ He didn’t even care how possessive that sounded, he’d been through too much to let anyone take something so good away from him.

He almost felt nervous as they ate lunch, unsure how to broach the subject with her without sounding jealous or overly protective. He had a feeling she wouldn’t like it if it sounded like he wanted to keep her safe. She was so used to being self sufficient and standing up for herself she may be insulted if he implied he wanted to protect her...

He sighed, and Ingalan patted him on the shoulder, as if he could read Kylo’s thoughts, and he probably could to a certain extent. “Just tell her you think there’s no need to keep it quiet anymore and this way you’ll be able to spend more time together, don’t overthink it.”

Kylo nodded and Javiell smirked, “He always either over thinks things or just reacts without thinking at all.”

Kylo had to laugh with the others, Javiell had a point.

 

 

****  
  


  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Check out my beta Autonomee’s fic, Niima
> 
> And the lovely new fic by AlbaStarGazer called, Wolves.
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading, I’m humbled this is entertaining people other than myself. <3


	43. Put Your Heart In My Hands

 

After eating Kylo and the Knights went back to the games room to kill things, before Kylo left to meet Rey. They agreed to meet at the gym later, it would be prudent to bleed off some of the beasts energy before this evening.

As Kylo walked towards the agreed meeting place he ran over Ingalan’s suggestion on what he should say to Rey. He’d never had a girlfriend before, though he’d never actually wanted one till now. Sure, he’d fooled around, he had some experience, but none in the department of actual relationships.

But perhaps he was overthinking things again, when he was with Rey things seemed simple and easy, at least now they did. Would anything really change if people knew about it?

His mother would find out, but she would eventually anyway, even if by some miracle she didn’t work it out when she saw Rey next week, she may have even worked it out already.

It may alter their MMA classes, but not by much, no matter which way he turned over the question in his head, he couldn’t see any good reason why not to make it public.

He squared his shoulders as he rounded the corner of the main school building and made his way to the edge of the back of refectory which was now closed, only kitchen staff moved around, clearing away and wiping tables.

Kylo leant against the wall and watched the clouds scud across the sun, a slight prickling of his skin made him look away, expecting to see Rey. But no, this was not the feeling he got when she was near, _this was something else._

Kylo peered around, but no one was in sight, he frowned and stepped away from the wall, looking past the buttresses that stuck out past the ends of the glass wall of the refectory. For a moment he thought he saw movement, as if someone was disappearing into the trees that lined the driveway out of the school grounds. He blinked, and all he could see was the greenery moving in the wind. Even so, he was just taking a few hesitant steps in that direction when he felt the tingle of warmth that preceded Rey.

A few moments later she jogged around the corner, slowing to a walk when she saw him, a small smile on her lips. His heart clenched inside his chest as he smiled back.

“Sorry,” She huffed as she stopped a few feet in front of him, “Shopping took longer than it was meant to.” Kylo looked her up and down with amusement, “Did you not buy anything or did you somehow manage to find a shop that sold very distressed men’s clothing?”

She glared at him and folded her arms, “I got some things. Like I said, we got back later than we were meant to. If you have a problem with what I am wearing, I can go and hang out with Finn and Poe.”

 _Shit._ He really needed to know when to be quiet. _This was not going well._ He closed the gap between them and pulled her protesting body into his arms. “I don’t care what you wear, you can wear a plastic bag and I would still think you were beautiful.” He said as he kissed her hair.

She made a grumbley noise at him but allowed him to lift her chin for a kiss. He made it slow and sweet, his hands resting on her hips, thumbs gently caressing her under her t-shirt.

He knew he was getting through to her when she insistently went up on her tiptoes, so she could deepen the kiss, he chuckled against her mouth and she made a little needy sound that made his skin ignite like he’d been doused with petrol and set on fire. Their lips connected again, this time with more urgency, the little noises she made as he touched her, tasted her, sent his head spinning, until he suddenly thought of Hux’s words. _Bloody Hux._

Kylo was about to pull away to try and ask her about going public when she withdrew, suddenly her attention shifted behind him, a frown on her face.

She took a few steps away from him, her head tilted to one side as she stared in the direction he had been looking before she arrived. A little frisson of fear went through him.

“What is it?” He asked softly as he went to stand beside her, looking at her as her gaze roved over the trees and bushes. She shook her head and gave him a lopsided smile, “I thought I felt.. _Something._ I wouldn’t have paid it any thought except, I felt it earlier today when we were shopping.” She shrugged, looking a little embarrassed.

Kylo frowned back, “Just before you arrived I thought I felt something, and it was coming from the direction you are currently looking…”

Rey looked up at him quickly, “Shall we go and check it out?” That little frisson of fear filtered through him again and he shook his head slowly. Whatever it was, if it even was anything, they had no weapons and no one knew where they were… he shook himself, _what was he thinking?_ It was nothing, _weapons? He was an idiot._ “I’m sure it is nothing… Look, I have something I need to ask you.”

But Rey’s attention was still mostly on the trees, that may make saying what he wanted to say easier though, he plunged in, “Could we make… our being together public? We’d get to spend more time together and no one else would hit on you.” Rey’s head snapped up, he had her full attention now, he concentrated on not swallowing before continuing. “I don’t think there is any reason to keep it quiet now, unless… you don’t want people knowing, that is.” He finished awkwardly.

She studied him a moment, her face closed down as she did, he reached out to brush her hand with his, and the connection of their skin pulled him abruptly into her mind, _Is this a trick? Does he really like me? Should I feel this strongly about him? How do relationships work? What if I do something to ruin it? What if he gets bored with me? Will I have to do things I don’t want to do? Will he expect me to dress differently? What will Finn say?_

Kylo quickly broke the connection, his head spinning and a coil of anger growing in the pit of his stomach. _Had she learned nothing? Why could she not believe he loved her… and why the hell did it matter what 2187 thought?_

He roughly pulled her hand up to rest on his cheek, and pulled her into his mind. He did it without thought, without a conscious decision and he showed her his heart.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey was shocked as Kylo suddenly and angrily yanked her hand up to his face, then she was falling into the maelstrom that was his mind. He pulled her through till he got to it’s centre, _his heart_ … And it was full of her. She was overwhelmed, astonished and bewildered by the depths of his feelings for her. No one had ever really loved her, she had loved her cat friends back in Jakku, the dogs she occasionally fed, she had an affection for Finn that was perhaps love, but this, _this was almost incomprehensible._

He released her, steadying her as she swayed in front of him, she couldn’t speak at first, there was a wetness on her face as she met his anxious eyes, _what had she done to deserve his love?_

He raised a thumb and brushed the tears from her cheek, “You didn’t have to do anything, love isn’t earned... It is a gift, and I give it to you freely. _Rey,_ even if you drive me crazy, I would never demand anything of you, I… I _love you._ If there is anything in my life that I am sure of, it is that we belong together, call it destiny, fate, whatever, I don’t care, _all I want is you…_ ”

He trailed off, his cheeks a little red, his eyes desperate for her to understand, and perhaps she did. As she gazed at him, she felt a swelling inside, as if her heart was expanding to make room for him, _because that was where he belonged._ But what did you say in answer to a declaration like that?

He smiled, “You don’t have to say anything, love,” he said as if he had heard the thought, and of course he had, their connection was completely open at this point. Rey squashed down the automatic feeling of fear at how vulnerable she was. _It didn’t matter._ “I love you too.” She said simply, her voice a little strained as she tried to contain the emotions that were trying to consume her.

It didn’t matter, Kylo’s face shone and he pulled her to him and kissed her like he would never, ever let her go. And that was fine.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'll be there, till the stars don't shine  
'Til the heavens burst and the words don't rhyme  
I know when I die you'll be on my mind  
And I'll love you, always

~ Always by Bon Jovie

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it is short, and I may not be able to post much over the next week. Please forgive <3  
> Quite a few songs in my head for this, (most of them gratuitously sappy)  
> ~Always by Bon Jovi,  
> ~Iris by Goo Goo Dolls,  
> ~(Everything I Do) I Do It for You by Bryan Adams  
> ~I'd Do Anything for Love By Meatloaf  
> ~I'd Lie For You By Meatloaf
> 
> Thank you to Autonomee betaing <3


	44. I Think I’m Paranoid

 

They kissed for a long time, sinking into one another till Rey didn’t know where Kylo began and she ended. Eventually they paused to draw breath, smiling giddily at one another. “I promised the others I’d join them in the gym,” Kylo said regretfully, “You can come if you want? Though you’d need to change.”

Rey was sorely tempted, but guessed Jess and the girls would send a search party for her soon, apparently she had to get ready with them and that would take a while if last week was anything to go by. She shook her head, “I need to get back, but maybe gym tomorrow?” 

He smiled at that, “Perfect. Might be a good time to spar, and this time, _ I will win _ .” The promise in his eyes spoke of other things and they made Rey shiver in anticipation, she arched an eyebrow at him, “Of course you will, keep telling yourself that, one day it may even be true...  _ But it won’t be tomorrow.” _

He growled and grabbed her, pushing her against the brick work of the buttress, kissing her until her toes curled and she was moaning against his mouth, as his hands cupped her backside.

He pulled away,  _ too soon, too soon,  _ smirking, “If you surrender that easily tomorrow then we’ll only be in the gym for two minutes.”

Rey glared up at him. “ _ You _ will be going home in a fucking ambulance.” She said fiercely and he blinked, then laughed. “Okay, A: I am already home and B:  _ I’d like to see you try. _ ” He said, in a cocky voice while clearly trying to keep his face straight, and failing.

Rey narrowed her eyes but smiled at him as sweetly as she could, “Okay _ , shark boy _ , I will make it good how you dare, with what you dare, and when you dare. I don’t try,  _ I win _ .”

She could feel the adrenaline zinging through her system, could see it reflected in his wide pupils and unconsciously flexing shoulders, lips parted slightly as he breathed.

“We should probably go, if we continue like this I don’t think I’ll be able to wait till tomorrow.” He said, his voice had gone rough and the sound seemed to pull at something deep inside her.

She took a deep breath, then another, trying to balance herself then nodded, “Probably a good idea… So, I’ll see you tonight?” 

He took a breath too, “Yeah. Shall I meet you in the lobby or just at the pit?”

Rey laughed a little, “It may be best just to meet at the pit, I have no idea how long I’ll be with Jess and the others, they take an inordinately long time doing something so simple as just getting dressed.”

Kylo chuckled a little, then looked serious, “Do we go back together? Or make our first public appearance together tonight?”

Rey shrugged, “I honestly have no idea, though… Maybe tonight would be better? I’d like Finn to hear it from me first rather than second hand.” He frowned slightly at that but nodded anyway.

“You go first, you are probably late to meet the guys by now and I’m not on a clock.” She said and he smiled, pulling her in for one quick kiss before walking away.

Rey enjoyed the view of him until he rounded the corner, then counted to sixty before starting that way herself, but that odd feeling of  _ something  _ came over her again and she turned back around frowning. It was the same area that drew her eye as before and she decided to go back to the dorm via the library instead of the way she’d come, so she could get a better look.

When she was halfway between the point of interest and the school, she paused, perhaps now was not a good time to be chasing shadows?  _ What on earth did she expect to find anyway?  _ She was being ridiculous. She huffed a derisive laugh at herself and turned, making her way up past the library and the dorm.

She had only gone a few steps in that direction when the feeling returned tenfold and she turned sharply, so sharply the dart that had been headed for the back of her neck flew past her, barely inches from her cheek.

Her instincts took over as her brain scrambled and she took off running towards the dorm, zigzagging as she went to make herself a harder target until she could get some cover.

Once she hit an area of bushes she ducked behind them and peered around to see if she was being followed.

There was no one, nothing to indicate anyone had been following her,  _ had she imagined that?  _ She had half a mind to go back and find the dart, but dismissed that as foolish. She could ask someone to go back with her, but what if they found nothing? She’d look stupid and paranoid, and if someone had been trying to dart her they would possibly remove the evidence when they realised she wouldn’t be back straight away...

_ There were people in the desert who used darts, and that flash of desert dark skin and that being watched feeling _ … Running footsteps jolted her out of her train of thought and she slipped into a defensive crouch as someone rounded the bushes.

It was Kylo, his eyes were wide as he took her in, breathing hard, looking around wildly as if he expected someone to be attacking her. Rey straightened with a frown, “Are you okay?” She asked, feeling slightly confused. 

He looked at her incredulously, “Me? I just felt you… You were afraid, freaked out, what happened?” He was still looking around, head swivelling, eyes flickering.

Rey blushed slightly,  _ she was such a moron, _ “Err, sorry. I guess I just spooked myself.” She said sheepishly. He gave her a hard look, “Rey, you are not the sort of person who just gets  _ ‘spooked’. _ What happened? Was it Hux?”

Rey rolled her eyes, “ _ Please. _ Hux does  _ not _ scare me... No, I just thought I saw something, but I was wrong, clearly.” She finished dryly, gesturing about them at the empty space.

Kylo gave her a long look but she just gave it back to him and he sighed, “Okay, I should probably go, I just randomly ran out of the gym after just reaching the others. They’re probably following me.” He looked about then gave her a quick kiss, “See you tonight,  _ little Scavenger. _ ”

And he was jogging back, before she had a chance to smack him upside the head.

She settled for doing it later and walked back to the dorm at a sensible, sedate pace, putting her skittishness down to doing so much sneaking around lately.

And yet, paranoia kept you alive in Jakku… But this was  _ not _ the desert. This was  _ not  _ that sort place.

Rey found the others still watching their movie, Poe and Finn cuddled up in an armchair together. She closed the door quietly, smiling; perhaps she and Kylo would be able to do that soon? She had to admit that would be really nice, though she would probably need to work up to that much display of affection when around others.

She went to the kitchen to make herself tea, humming absently as she stared out of the window while it brewed, watching the golden leaves being pulled from the trees by the insistent wind.

Warm hands suddenly snaked around her waist and she gave a start, for a second she assumed they were Kylo’s, and she turned, wondering why he was back from the gym so soon.

It was bloody Hux. As she’d turned he’d gripped her wrists, as if anticipating her anger. Rey smiled up at him, his mouth was just curving in surprised response when she kneed him in the balls.  _ Such _ a rookie mistake, he’d left himself wide open.

The grip on her wrists slackened and she pushed him to the side so she could get by him, “You bitch!” He hissed at her, eyes watering, face red and furious. Rey shrugged at him as she poured her tea. “I’ve told you not to touch me. I’ve warned you. I don’t think I can make myself any clearer.”

He straightened, grimacing as he did so, trying to regulate his breathing. “You will pay for that.”

Rey rolled her eyes, “Uh huh, and I’ve heard that before. Probably best just to quit Hux, you’re clearly no good at this.” Perhaps she shouldn’t be goading him, but damn it, it was fun.

“ _ I will make you bleed.” _ He hissed again, it seemed the only tone he could currently manage. Rey smirked at him, put her tea on the counter then pulled up the side of her t-shirt, showing him her line of scars amid the others, then dropped the hem and picked up her tea. “Do you really think that would be something I’d be afraid of?”

He paused, jaw working for a few seconds before closing the distance between them in a few strides, Rey just looked up at him, unwilling to let him intimidate her anymore, he was just a giant child.

“But the way I will make you bleed isn’t something I think you’ve experienced before, if I’m any judge.” He said, voice back to silkily threatening. He leaned in closer till his lips were beside her ear and whispered, “You will bleed when _ I fuck you. _ ”

He drew back, as Rey felt her skin go so cold it burned, his pale eyes were watching her expectantly, pupils large. Rey tried to still her hammering heart, if Kylo felt the wave of rage he would likely come running again and that wouldn’t be such a good idea. So she threw up some walls to contain what she was feeling, they held,  _ barely.  _ She had come across this sort of threat before, but then it was grunted at her by disheveled older men or spat by hard eyed youths. Hearing it from such a cultured, well spoken boy in such a disparate setting was somehow so much more shocking. She tilted her head to the side as she looked at him, he must have seen some clue to her inner turmoil as he took an involuntary step back. “I wonder if you’ll be able to pick your teeth up with broken fingers?” She asked calmly, somehow managing to appear cold and projecting nothing but curiosity. 

It took him a moment to work it out and he was just opening his mouth to reply when a rush of students came into the kitchen and the moment was lost.

Rey stayed where she was, watching him with unblinking eyes, his mouth thinned and he turned with a snarl, the year elevens scattering out of his way.

“Err hi, Rey.” A boy said. Rey blinked as she refocused, tearing her mind away from Hux’s words and tried to remember who was talking to her… “Hi, err, Ryleaf.” She said suddenly awkward. “So, you going out with Hux then?” He asked and Rey gaped at him in shock, “What?  _ Fuck. No. _ Why the hell would you think that?”

Ryleaf exchanged a confused look with the boy standing next to him… Crispaul. That was it. “Oh, sorry. That’s the rumour, we were just wondering.”

Rey snorted in disgust. “I am absolutely not going out with Hux. If he were the last boy in the universe, I would kill myself. Can I make that any clearer?”

They laughed nervously, darting glances to the doorway Hux had just stormed out of. “You’re looking a lot better.” Crispaul said as if trying not to dwell on Rey’s lack of respect for Hux.

Rey shrugged uncomfortably, suddenly realising they were the ones she had been sparring with when she lost it on Monday. “Yeah, I guess I am… Listen, I’m sorry about that, I didn’t know what I was doing. I hope I didn’t hurt you.”   
They laughed, still slightly nervously, “Nah, we’re okay... I heard it took Master Luke and Kylo’s Knights to take you down though.” Ryleaf said, a hint of awe tinging his voice and Crispaul nodded enthusiastically, adding, “And I heard you’re the only person who’s ever beaten Kylo Ren in MMA.”

Rey couldn’t keep a smirk off her face at that, but added honestly, “It was a draw, not a win.”

Crispaul waved it off as if it weren’t important, “You coming out to the pit tonight?”

Rey shrugged, “Isn’t everyone?” She said as she put her empty mug in the dishwasher. 

Ryleaf laughed, “Yeah, I guess. Some of us are gonna play spin the bottle, you can join us if you like?” 

Rey was just opening her mouth to ask what that was when Poe’s voice said, “Spin the bottle? That game is a recipe for disaster!” Rey looked up to see Poe and Finn, hand in hand. “Hey Peanut, want to go to dinner?” Finn said, for some reason looking smugly at Ryleaf and Crispaul.

“Sure,” Rey said easily and Finn slung an arm around her shoulder, “See you later,” She said to the other boys awkwardly and left with Finn and Poe.

“What’s spin the bottle?” She asked when they got outside. Poe laughed wickedly at that, “Oh, girl, sometimes I forget underneath all that violence you are so damn innocent.” Rey raised her eyebrows at Finn who grinned at her.

“It’s a party game, Peanut. There are a few versions of it, but in a nutshell a group of people sit in a circle with a bottle in the centre. When you spin the bottle you have to kiss whoever it is pointing at when it stops spinning.”

Rey stared at him, “But, why?” That made Poe laugh so hard they had to stop walking, Finn was laughing quite a lot too. Rey stood there perplexedly trying to work out why what she had said was amusing them so much.

“What’s so funny?” Jess called as she and the rest of Poe’s gang caught up to them. Rey shook her head, “I have absolutely no idea.”

Poe stood up wheezing, “We were trying to explain the rules of spin the bottle to Rey.” He said, wiping his eyes. “She doesn’t seem to understand the point of it.”

Everyone else seemed to find that amusing too. “Oh my stars, Rey-Rey, we should play it tonight!” Kenjad squealed. 

“Err, I think I’ll pass? Thanks though.” Rey said uncomfortably as they started walking again. “Oh, but you might kiss someone you like!” Maritan said, “And apart from Finn and Poe, none of us are attached. It’s perfect.”

Jess nodded in agreement. Rey was confused all over again, wasn’t Jess seeing… well quite a few people actually.

“Err,” Rey said searching desperately searching for an excuse that didn’t involved telling them she wasn’t available herself. 

“You’re not still hung up on Kylo Ren, are you?” Kenjad whispered to her, Jess and Maritan leaned in to catch Rey’s answer with interest.

“What makes you say that?” Rey asked, hoping to divert them somehow. “Oh, well you know, cos you guys kissed last week and then it all went shit-shaped.” Kenjad answered as if Rey was being particularly dense.

“Ah, yes.” Rey acknowledged uncomfortably, still groping for a suitable answer and coming up blank. “Maybe we should talk about this later.” Maritan said kindly and Rey gave her a grateful look.

Kenjad shrugged, “Okay. So what you gonna wear tonight, Rey-Rey?”  

Rey almost sighed in relief, “I was going to wear some of my new jeans and a hoodie.”

They all looked at her in horror. “Oh no you don’t.” Jess said firmly, “You can wear one of the pretty tops and your leather jacket.”

“And your new necklace,” Maritan added. Rey allowed herself to sigh but nodded acquiescently. 

~~~

As soon as the girls had finished eating, they went straight back to the dorm to shower and get ready. Rey retreated up to her floor, revelling in the quiet as she showered.

Once she was done she looked through the clothes choices before her, _ there were so many.  _ The bag with the bras in it was still on the bed, and when she tipped it out she was surprised to find someone had added what looked like scraps of lace and gauze. She picked them up and after turning this way and that, realised they were meant to be underwear.

She snorted to herself and put them back in the bag, and that is where they would be staying. After gazing at her clothes for a few more minutes she just shut her eyes and grabbed what her hand found first.

Ironically her outfit would be all black, almost as if she were one of the Knights. She wriggled in to the tight black jeans with leather inserts, buckles and lacing, awkwardly put on one of her new bras and put on the black top with long sleeves and high neck made of see through black net.

She shoved her feet into the chunky black boots and grabbed her leather biker jacket.

Before she went downstairs, she sprayed some Nightbloomer over herself then walked down to the girls’ room so they could attack her hair and face.

She had barely knocked on the door when it flew open and she was pulled unceremoniously inside. “Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, Rey-Rey! You look awesome!” Kenjad said grinning from ear to ear. “Oh and I know what hairstyle will go with this perfectly!” Maritan said, grabbing a brush and pushing Rey onto a stool so she could get to work.

All three of them were in jeans too, due to the weather getting colder by the day. Kenjad’s however were mostly holes with white lace underneath, the light blue material, teamed with a  tight wrap around top in a shocking pink. Jess was dressed in dark blue jeans with copper and gold beads and embroidery and a shimmery copper top that looked like silk and showed a good deal of cleavage. Maritan was in dark blue jeans as well, shoved into thigh high brown leather boots and a pretty cream lace top and wide belt.

Rey sat quietly watching the other two do their makeup talking about what look would be best for Rey’s outfit. Rey expected Maritan to leave her hair down, but to her pleasure she realised it was being put up, no curling tongs in sight.

She took a deep breath, she felt like she owed them this. “There’s something I need to tell you guys, and I’m not sure you’ll like it.” They looked surprised and Jess turned the music down and she and Kenjad came and sat on the bed next to Rey’s stool.

“So, spill.” Kenjad said when Rey hesitated. Rey blushed then muttered, “I’m… seeing Kylo Ren.” There was a pregnant pause and she looked up from her feet, unsure what she would see but unwilling to let the silence grow without seeing Kenjad and Jess’s faces, Maritan’s hands had stilled in their work on her hair.

Kenjad’s eyes were wide in surprise but not disapproving and Jess’s face was morphing from shocked to considering. Maritan’s hands restarted their clever weaving, “Well.” She said in a light voice, “So long as you really like him, that’s cool I guess.”

Jess nodded slowly, “If this had been a few weeks ago, I may have locked you in your room till you saw sense, but... He has seemed to change somewhat since you arrived.”

“Why didn’t you say sooner? How long, how long?” Kenjad asked, waving her little hands in agitation. Rey shrugged, “I guess since Thursday night? We weren’t sure about what it was and didn’t want to tell people till now. You can’t say anything till I’ve told Finn though, I think he may die if he heard it from someone else and I haven’t been able to get him away from Poe yet.”

“Awww, that’s cute.” Kenjad smiled, dimples showing, and Jess joined her, but then frowned, “Wait, how have you two been meeting up? You said Thursday night? How did you get the chance?”

“Ahhh.” Rey said, “Well… Okay you have to promise not to tell anyone this too.” They nodded, clearly intrigued. “We’ve been going over the roof and entering each other’s rooms via the window.” Maritan made a choked, horrified noise and Kenjad squealed, “That is really hot, but so dangerous!” 

Jess just grinned though, “I should have known. So he likes climbing too huh?” She turned to Kenjad, “ _ Trust _ . If anyone is fine doing that, it is Rey, she’s like a bloody monkey and I think she may be made of rubber anyway.” 

Rey blushed at that and grinned back shrugging, “I like climbing.” The others laughed, though it was slightly nervously from Maritan and Kenjad.

“Okay,” Maritan said, patting Rey on the shoulder lightly. “You’re done! Make up time now!”

Rey automatically lifted her hands to pat her hair but Maritan pulled them away with a long suffering sigh, “Look with your eyes, not your hands, silly. There’s a mirror right over there!”

Rey blushed a little more and, muttering apologies, stood and went over to look. She had to admit it looked really cool. Her hair was swept up tightly at the sides, into a crest going along the centre of her head, it was a slight nod to her preferred style of three buns but looked so much more dramatic. It worked perfectly with the high neck of the top she wore.

She grinned as she turned to Maritan waiting anxiously behind her. “I love it, thank you.” Maritan beamed, cheeks flushing. “No problem,” She replied, though pride coloured her light voice.

“Make up!” Sang Kenjad as she urged Rey to sit again. “Okay, cos your outfit and hair are so edgy and sort of masculine I’m going to make you look super pretty to balance that out.”

“Okay,” Rey said uncertainly, she understood makeup styles less than hair styles, and that really wasn’t saying much. “But could I have lip stain again instead of lipstick?”

“Sure,” Kenjad said as she started work, while Maritan did Jess’s hair. “So, I guess no spin the bottle for you tonight then?” Kenjad said as she brushed something over Rey’s eyelids.

Rey tried to keep her face from grimacing and putting Kenjad off, “I guess not.”

“Shame.” Jess said, though Rey couldn’t see her. “You would have brought more people to play.” Rey wasn’t sure what that meant so she kept quiet.

It was strange again, seeing someone so different in her reflection of the mirror. Her eyelids were a light smokey charcoal, lined in black, elongating her eyes at the sides. Under her eyes there was a light smokey metallic plum, making the green and gold in her hazel eyes stand out. Her lashes were thick and long, her brows more defined in elegant arches, her cheekbones somehow more prominent, shimmering slightly at the tops. 

The lipstain made her lips look fuller and recently bitten. She wondered what Kylo would think… Then mentally kicked herself, if he didn’t like it he could go jump of a bloody roof.

“Okay, ladies,” Jess said as she stood, Maritan having finished the wispy messy bun in her hair. “Before we go, let’s take a drink.” She pulled out a bottle from under a bed, uncapped it and grinned at them, “To being gorgeous and having a good night.” She saluted them with the bottle and took a swig then passed it on to Maritan, who passed it to Kenjad who passed it to Rey. The liquid was creamy and absolutely delicious. Rey could feel it burn as it hit her stomach. “What is that?” She asked and Jess laughed, “It’s Baileys. It’s the best isn’t?” Rey nodded and handed it back so Jess could hide it under her jacket.

“Right, let’s get this show on the road, huh?” Kenjad said and they gathered their jackets and went tripping excitedly down the stairs, their energy was infectious and Rey was giggling along with them as she entered the lobby, just as Hux was about to go through. 

He stopped in his tracks as he noticed her, his cheeks flushing slightly, Rey could feel his gaze grow heated as he took her in. But she was high on excitement. So she just raised an eyebrow, smirked at him and pointedly turned her back as they walked into the kitchen, not once looking back.

“ _ Ohmystars, _ Peanut,  _ yes! _ ” Finn yelled as they joined the boys in the common area. Rey laughed as she hugged him. “Oh,  _ hell yes _ .” Poe said as he came up behind Finn to give Rey an approving once over. Rey rolled her eyes at him, still grinning. “None of this has anything to do with me, this is all Jess, Maritan and Kenjad.” Poe rolled his eyes right back at her.

“Nuh-uh.” Kenjad said, gripping Rey’s arm, “We just gave you a kick up the backside, is all. And, Rey-Rey, honey. You need to call me Ken or Kenji and Maritan, Mari.”

Rey smiled, “Okay, but can I ask, Rey-Rey… Is that permanent?” They all laughed, “Yup. Jess said, “You don’t get to choose nicknames, and Finn has said only he is allowed to call you Peanut.” Finn folded his arms and nodded emphatically, making Rey smile. “Okay, I guess Rey-Rey it is.” And Kenjad looked very smug at that.

“Okay people, let’s go embrace the night.” Poe called and they moved off into the cool darkness under a sky full of stars.

 

****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry, sorry this is so late and it’s all Rey. I suck. Kylo POV tomorrow, I promise <3
> 
> Song in my head for last part of this was: “Let's Turn The Night” by RuPaul. The other one for a few parts of this chapter was "I Think I'm Paranoid" by Garbage.
> 
> Just in case you are wondering, Rey is wearing: Black Mirror Top and Dark Conspiracy Trousers by Punk Rave, boots are New Rock Style M.563-S1 in black. Hair is in a faux hawk.
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	45. Over The Edge, Into Darkness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Sexual assault and attempted date rape.

As they spilled out of the dorm, Rey pulled on Finn’s arm, “Could I talk to you for a second?” Finn broke away from Poe, and walked slower next to Rey as the others pulled ahead a little. “What’s up?” He asked with an easy, sweet smile. Rey was nervous all over again and wished she’d had more of Jess’s Baileys. “Um. Okay... I’m seeing Kylo Ren.” She finished quickly, shoulders tense.

_ “You’re what?” _ Squawked Finn, stopping completely to look at Rey with shocked eyes. “Peanut… _ Are you serious? _ ”

Rey bit her lip and nodded. Finn just looked at her and shook his head in disbelief. Poe trotted back to them, “What’s going on?” He asked and Rey cringed slightly- but everyone would know soon enough anyway, Poe finding out now didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things, she opened her mouth to reply but Finn beat her to it.

“Rey is seeing  _ Kylo Ren _ !” He sounded scandalised. Poe looked at Rey, then back at Finn. “So?”

Finn and Rey both looked at him in surprise and he shrugged, “What can I say? They have undeniable chemistry. Finn,  _ honey _ , how many times has he done things for Rey? He’s carried her to the nurse’s office twice when she’s been unconscious, he stopped Hux from doing whatever the fuck he was planning last Thursday, he  _ saved her life _ after she almost drowned  _ and _ he was her first kiss! Do the maths.”

Rey blushed crimson and Finn blinked, opened his mouth, then shut it again. Then he put an arm around Rey, “Well when you put it like that, I guess, yeah, it kinda does make sense, in a… really weird way.”

Poe rolled his eyes and took Finn’s unoccupied hand in his own as they started walking again,  _ “It’s not weird,  _ if anything it's sort of romantic.” 

Finn laughed and shook his head, “But… Well, I mean,  _ Kylo Ren!” _ Poe passed him a bottle and he absently took a long swallow, then offered it to Rey.

“What is it?” She asked. Poe grinned, “It’s Chocolate Red Wine. It sounds weird but just try it.” 

Rey took a mouthful and frowned. “That… really is weird.”

Poe laughed, “Yup. I still don’t know if I like it or not, but I keep buying it cos it’s so…  _ odd _ .”

Rey took another swig before handing it back to Finn, he took another pull and passed it to Poe. “So, are you and Kylo Ren an item or just casual or what?” Finn asked. Rey could see the approaching firelight through the trees and she felt a gentle hum of anxiety as she answered. “I think we are an item.” She said softly.

“You don’t sound sure.” Poe observed and Finn nodded, frowning. Rey shrugged uncomfortably, “I’m new to this stuff. We’re going to be… together this evening, so I guess that means we are an item?”

Poe and Finn exchanged a look that Rey couldn’t interpret, “Oh, Peanut.” Finn said gently and paused to pull her into a hug. “Don’t you worry, I’ll always have your back.”

Rey smiled, “And you know I’ll always have yours.” She answered, as they entered the ring of firelight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

As Kylo jogged back to the gym after booking it at the feeling of fear Rey had projected, he met Ingalan and Javiell. 

“What the fuck happened?” Javiell asked as they fell into step with him, the confusion painting their faces mirroring the whirl of thoughts in his head.

He shrugged unhappily, “You know that connection I seem to have with Rey? It suddenly spiked with real fear and I had to make sure she was alright.”

“And was she?” Ingalan asked. Kylo shrugged again, “She said she was fine, but when I got to her she was hiding behind a bush, her breathing was ragged and she’d dropped into a fighting crouch. It was weird… She claimed she’d just been spooked.”

Javiell snorted, “I find that hard to believe, she’s not a girly, squealie kinda girl is she?” Kylo shook his head, frowning still.

“She is not, is there any reason she’d lie to you?” Ingalan asked, his voice concerned but also slightly wary.

Kylo felt his frown grow deep as he thought, pushing away the anger that tried to rise at the question. “I don’t think so.” He said slowly, trying to sort through his muddled thoughts.

“Unless,” Said Javiell, “She was spooked by something, but it was something that would have normal girls shitting their pants.”

“But what could have done that?” Ingalan mused, while Kylo listened. “I mean, she isn’t afraid of Hux, or anyone else. Everyone is scared of Snoke but I’ve never actually seen him outside the main building.”

Kylo finally managed to connect the dots in his head. “Something happened earlier when we met up by the refectory.” He started slowly but gained speed as he carried on. “There was a feeling of…  _ something. _ I don’t know what, a sort of feeling that we were being watched, but with more of a menace to it. I don’t know. But she felt it too, even looked in exactly the same direction as I had when I was on my own as I waited for her.  _ And _ she said she’d felt it earlier when they were at the Galaxy centre too… Maybe it was related to that…” He trailed off, realising that he was still a long way from understanding what had made that abrupt terror lance through her.

They entered the gym and Ingalan shrugged, “Maybe you can get her to tell you tonight when she’s had a few drinks.”

Kylo nodded absently, mind distracted. Javiell clapped him on the back. “There is nothing you can do for now, so lets just get on with bleeding the beast.”

Kylo rolled his eyes at Javiell’s phrasing but nodded, he had a lot of ‘bleeding’ to do after all.

~~~

Their session went well, for a brief moment there had been a flash of fury through the…  _ bond?  _ But it had disappeared into nothing as quickly as it came so he paid it no mind. By the time they had finished he was calm and relaxed and pleasantly tired.

After eating and showering he dressed carefully, in a black long sleeved shirt embroidered with tribal designs across the front and shoulders, distressed black jeans, New Rock motorcycle boots, and his leather biker jacket. Then he sprayed some Bottled Night on before joining the others and smuggling their beer downstairs. 

As they moved through the common area, Kylo noticed Poe’s lot still hanging around, which meant Rey was still getting ready.

Once they were out into the darkness they cracked open a bottle of Trooper each as they walked. The firepit depression was mostly full when they arrived, but Kylo spied Hux immediately, surrounded by his sycophants and deep in conversation with Ismasta. Kylo frowned, again wondering about Hux’s earlier implication of somehow getting to Rey. But she would be with him tonight, she’d be safe. Kylo smirked as Hux’s eyes caught his. Hux was going to be extremely disappointed this evening.  _ How satisfying. _ The Knights found logs to sit on, kicking off some year elevens who scattered like startled mice under the stares of the older black clad boys.

“I’ll go hand over our contribution to Phasma.” Zainmar said and headed over to the two prefects on fire duty that night.

Leonmar lit up a cigarette and they chatted idly till Zainmar came back, grinning like a Nexu. “Oh, you are about to irritate a lot of people, Kylo.” He said as he sat down. “There are rumours that the Scavenger was going to join in a game of spin the bottle.  _ A lot  _ of people were interested.” 

Kylo felt a stab of jealousy at that. “Oh really?” He said in as even a voice as he could manage.

Zainmar laughed then shrugged, “Apparently. Anyway, there is still the possibility that Jessika will be playing Ingalan, might be worth a shot.”

Ingalan raised an eyebrow, “Not really my kind of game, but thanks for the heads up.”

Leonmar grinned, “I could probably be persuaded. So long as I don’t end up kissing  _ you, _ Zainmar.”  

The others laughed, “Hey! I’m a total catch and you’d be very lucky.” Zainmar said, mock indignantly. 

Then Javiell dug Kylo in the ribs and jerked his chin up. “Your Scavenger’s here.”

Kylo turned wondering why he hadn’t felt her, then swallowed, mind going blank.  _ “Holy fuck. _ ” Zainmar said. Kylo nodded in agreement.

Rey had paused just inside the ring of firelight, Finn’s arm casually slung around her shoulder. She was dressed in all black, and looked like some sort of punk model rather than a ragged androgynous scavenger.

Kylo stood, unable to look away from her. She’d looked really good last Saturday, but this was something else entirely.

“I think people are about to get a whole lot more pissed at you.” Ingalan said in an amused voice.

Rey grinned as Finn said something in her ear, and Kylo felt a sliver of irritation but dismissed it. She looked up suddenly, straight at him, smiling slightly. His whole body flushed with heat, and he started making his way towards her as she did the same.

She was stopped almost immediately by some year eleven boys who crowded round her. Kylo pushed through them easily and casually took her hand in his, “Sorry boys, she’s taken.” He said, unable to keep the smugness out of his voice. 

Rey blushed, lips quirked, eyebrow raised at him but didn’t say anything till they had got past the knot of whispering people. “Taken?” She said, amusement mixed with shyness in her tone.

Kylo stopped and stood facing her, giving her a cocky smile. “Yes. Taken.” He said, then kissed her, not caring who was watching or what they thought.

She tasted of something sweet, and was wearing the same perfume he was coming to think of as her signature scent. 

His hands roaming her waist and sides, her hands were rather more reserved than normal and he assumed she was a little shy about doing this in front of so many people.  _ Which was kind of cute. _

When they pulled back from each other she was a little breathless and smiled up at him. “New clothes look good.” He said casually, tucking a little wisp of hair behind her ear.

She blushed and his chest squeezed. “Thanks. Though I’m not sure what the point of jeans that are this tight are.” He laughed, “The point is that they look good,  _ my little Scavenger _ .”

She rolled her eyes, then grinned, “I snagged a pair of mens jeans too when no one was watching.”

It was Kylo’s turn to roll his eyes as he chuckled. “ _ Of course you did. _ What are you drinking?”

She shrugged, “Nothing. I had some of Poe’s Chocolate Red Wine on the way here... And yeah, it was as weird as it sounds.”

“Don’t you have a poison of choice?” Rey frowned at that. “I mean, what did you like to drink in the desert?” He amended.

She snorted, so unladylike. “We drank tea or water. We got Skee if we needed sewing up but it was revolting.” It still sometimes shocked Kylo when she spoke of such horrible things so casually. 

“Want to try some beer?” He asked and she shrugged again, “Sure.” She said easily and they went over to where the Knights were still sitting, discussing the merits of various girls.

“Hey, Scavenger.” Zainmar said to her as they sat down on a log. Rey gave them a small smile and a little wave. “Hi.”

Kylo handed her his half drunk bottle of beer to try. She took a suspicious swig and tilted her head to the side as she swallowed thoughtfully.

“So what do you think?” He asked. She nodded. “It’s not bad.”

Leonmar leaned towards them a little, “Do you know if there’s going to be a game of spin the bottle or was that a rumour?”

Rey laughed, “I’m not sure, Kenjad was really excited by the idea so maybe… I am not playing though.” Then she looked up anxiously at Kylo, “Will you?”

Kylo chuckled, she was adorable, “Why would I want to do that when I have you?” He told her, unable to keep the heat out of his voice.

She smiled in relief and he swooped in for another kiss, nipping at her lips and she moved a hand up into his hair.

“Okay, break it up children.” Leonmar said, sounding slightly disgruntled. “You’re just lonely.” Zainmar told him. “Can you get us into a spin the bottle game with your friends, Scavenger?”

Rey smiled at him, “I can go ask if you like?” Zainmar and Leonmar nodded enthusiastically. 

She stood and looked down at him, “You coming too or staying here for a moment?”

Kylo stood, “There is no way in hell I am letting you go anywhere tonight without me.” He told her firmly. She smirked at him, “Even if I need to pee?” Ingalan barked a laugh at that and the others joined in. “Well, perhaps not then, no.” Kylo answered, glaring at the Knights, then took her hand as she started off in search of her friends.

When they found the group, Rey slipped easily through the gaps and Kylo paused on the fringes, waiting for her.

Brobard turned to see him and gave him a nod, which Kylo returned. “So, you and the Scavenger, huh?” He asked without preamble.

Kylo nodded, “Yeah.” He answered, unsure about Brobard’s intention, but Brobard grinned. “Bet that pissed Hux right off.” Kylo returned the grin. “Oh,  _ I hope so _ .” He said and Brobard laughed.

They chatted for a few minutes with Ashtjac and Shaadr before Rey worked her way out to stand next to him, grimacing to herself.

“What’s up?” He asked her softly. She shook her head, “Oh, nothing. Ismasta got me to try a drink and it was gross.”

Kylo frowned. “I thought Ismasta was on the outs with these guys?” Rey shrugged, “He said sorry to me about what happened then said he thought I’d like the drink he had and insisted I try it. I sort of felt a bit guilty so I did, but he tipped the cup so I ended up swallowing more than I meant to.”

Kylo could feel his frown get deeper, a flicker of warning shivered through him, he looked over the heads of the group till he spied Ismasta, on the edge as if he didn’t belong.

“What was it?” He asked Rey, now feeling worry gnaw at him. She shook her head, “I think he said it was called Malibu? It was really sickly sweet.”

He looked at her closely, she looked fine at least, and what was it he suspected Ismasta of doing? He shrugged off his unease,  _ he was being paranoid. _

“So what did the girls say about spin the bottle?” Rey blinked in confusion then laughed. “Oh, yeah, they are going to start in a minute, shall we go tell the others?”

They linked fingers as they walked back to the Knights, her slender fingers cool against his.

“So what’s the verdict?” Zainmar asked as soon as they got there. Rey chuckled at him, “Yeah, they’re going to play soon, so head over now.”

Zainmar bounced up with a grin and hauled Leonmar up with him, “What about you two?” He asked looking at Javiell and Ingalan.

Javiell gave him a flat look, “Not my kind of thing.” He said and Ingalan shook his head, “Nor mine. But go and enjoy yourselves and _ good luck _ .” 

“Is it really true you have to kiss whoever the bottle points at?” Rey asked him as they sat, Kylo smiled, of course she wouldn’t know, “Yes.” Then laughed at her horrified expression.

“I thought Finn and Poe were joking.” She said is a shocked voice.

Ingalan smiled at her, “Sadly not. To be fair, it’s usually played by children.” If anything Rey looked more shocked. “But why would children want to kiss each other?”

Kylo met Ingalan’s amused eyes over Rey’s head. Ingalan chuckled, “Kids just do, maybe not so much in the desert though.”

She shook her head and Kylo pulled her against him, smirking to himself when he caught a glimpse of Hux’s pinched face in the crowd. 

She looked up at him, “Could we move a bit further from the fire?” She asked softly, “I’m really hot.”

They moved off closer to the edge of darkness, Rey gave him a disgusted look when he chivalrously offered her his jacket to sit on and took her own off instead.

His breath caught in his throat, the top she was wearing was see through on the sleeves and neck, and the opaque material of the rest of it clung to her slim waist, and the curve of her chest.

_ “You are so beautiful.” _ He said before he thought to stop himself. To his surprise she giggled. 

“So are you.” She answered. And he barked a laugh,  _ “Did you just call me beautiful?” _

She nodded firmly, “Yes. Yes, I did.” Then leaned in to kiss him. Kylo found being on the ground had it’s advantages and he hauled her into his lap as they kissed, hands slipping under her top to caress the skin of her waist. 

Her hands mirrored his, and she bit his lip, sucking it into her mouth making him hiss with pleasure that lanced straight down to his groin. He pulled away from her for a second, trying to convince his erection to kindly fuck off. But she wriggled in disappointment which only made things worse.

“It may be a good idea to take a breather.” He said, aware of how rough his voice had gotten and unable to do anything about it as he looked into her wide eyes.

She frowned, “Did I do something wrong?” She asked, making him chuckle. “No. It’s the opposite of that.”

She frowned again, this time clearly confused. He shrugged awkwardly. “If we don’t pause I may do things that aren’t appropriate for our audience.” 

She blushed, biting her lip which just made it even worse. But she slid off his lap, to his relief  _ and regret, _ and settled beside him. “So what,” She started, then ducked her head and yawned, “Shall we do tomorrow? Apart from me handing your arse to you, that is.”

Kylo raised an eyebrow, “Oh,  _ little Scavenger _ , when I am done with you, you will be begging for mercy.” 

There was that unladylike snort again, “You know nothing,  _ Shark Boy. _ ” It was spoilt a little by her ducking her head to yawn again, when she looked back up her eyes were sleepy.

“Oh, I’m sorry, am I keeping you up?” He asking in a teasing voice. She rolled her eyes at him then smirked, “I thought that’s what I was doing to you- why I had to get off your lap.”

He felt his face flush, he had thought,  _ he had hoped _ , that she hadn’t noticed. She laughed at his face, then yawned again. “I guess it’s the stress of going shopping.” She sighed as she leaned her head against his shoulder.

He was about to move her so he could tuck her underneath his arm, when the shit hit the fan. Or rather, a fight started and he could see it involved at least one of the Knights. _ Blood and bloody fucking ashes.  _

Rey looked up at him in protest as he went to stand, “I need to deal with this, I’ll be back in a second.” He kissed her on the forehead and quickly entered the fray.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey sat blinking owlishly as she watched Kylo walk away down the slope. She was starting to feel decidedly _ odd, _ things seemed to be blurring around the edges and her mind started to wander away from her as her head drooped down onto her drawn up knees.

_ “Finally.”  _ A voice said in her ear, but she couldn’t seem to turn her head and the only sound she managed to get her lips to form was,  _ “Wha?” _

There was quiet laughter in her ear and then she was up and moving, but her legs weren’t doing anything. “It’s a shame it had to be this way.”  _ That was Hux’s voice! _ She tried to struggle but her limbs were unresponsive, she could barely make her face glare at him, everything was so  _ hazy. _

She could feel though, there was a hand squeezing one of her breasts, she must have made a small noise of panic because he chuckled. “Ren is occupied, you are all mine now,  _ Scavenger scum.” _

For the first time in a while Rey felt  _ truly, truly afraid. _ But despite all her efforts, her body remained unresponsive to her commands to move or make noise.

Then she was down on the ground, Hux looming over her. He pressed his mouth to hers, opened her lips with his tongue and delved inside, his hand gripping her jaw, and  _ she couldn’t even shut her eyes, couldn’t even look away. _

He was breathing harshly and tasted of alcohol, his hands roamed up her top and inside her bra, and  _ she could do nothing. _

Then one moved to the fastening of her jeans, and white hot rage eclipsed her fear, the cold stars above her cleared her head enough to remind her of her connection to Kylo,  _ their bond.  _ She reached inside, yanked on the thread that connected them,  _ and screamed. _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I think you are all going to hate me for this… But I am posting the next chapter now so you don’t have to wait to see what happens.
> 
> If you have been affected by any of this and need to talk to someone, comment me your email address and we can chat, I can delete the comment before it is posted so no one will see you ask or see your email address. I suffered a similar assault when I was twelve, but no one came to save me. I’m not mentioning this because I want pity, but so you know that if you need to talk about something similar happening to you, I will understand.
> 
> The track I had in my head for a lot of this was, The gentle hum of anxiety by Trent Reznor & Atticus Rossr
> 
> If you are curious, Kylo is wearing Johnny (Boot-Cut) jeans from EMP, Black Tribe Long sleeve shirt by Doomsday and New Rock style M.1606-C1 boots.
> 
> And yes, Chocolate Red Wine is a thing. Try it. It is super weird and you need to drink a couple of bottles till you realise… That it’s really weird.


	46. The Beast Is Back And The Belle Of The Brawl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Sexual assault and attempted daterape, lots of violence

**~ ~ ~**

**These violent delights have violent ends** ****  
**And in their triumph die, like fire and powder,** **  
** **Which, as they kiss, consume.**

**~ Act 2, Scene 6, Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare**

**~ ~ ~**

 

The fight had been between all of the Knights and Hux’s followers, Kylo had waded straight in, unsure what the cause was but not really needing to know.

Once he had put anyone opposing him down or they had scrambled away, he looked about him, breathing hard. Adrenaline was still pulsing through him, they were all bruised and bloodied in places but the Knights had come out on top,  _ naturally. _

That was when he felt it, an overpowering pull on his connection to Rey and the sound of her screaming inside his head. It was a raw, terrified sound, one he hadn’t ever thought she could even make.

He looked up to where they had been sitting before he’d left her... Their jackets were still there, his beer bottle overturned,  _ but she was gone. _

_ And then he was terrified. _

**HUX.**

_ The fight was a distraction. _

**FUCKING HUX.**

Kylo screamed as the beast ripped free from all it’s restraints inside him.

And he was running, following his connection to Rey.

He didn’t hear as the others set off running after him, he was deaf to their shouted questions, he ran too fast for them to tackle him.  _ He must not let them stop him now. _

Hux was on top of Rey when he saw them, a hand trying to undo her jeans, his mouth on hers. Kylo didn’t stop running, as he jumped over them he grabbed Hux’s neck and yanked it with him as he went into a roll, pulling Hux with him as he went down.

He was just about to snap Hux’s neck like a twig when Ingalan and Javiell intervened. 

**“KYLO!** ** _KYLO!_** You need to stop. _You will kill him_.” Ingalan was yelling, as they pulled on his arms to prevent him from dealing out death, but Kylo was all beast and could only growl in response. His need to kill Hux was the only thing his brain could focus on, the only thing that was clear. He was so focused he didn’t react when Leonmar got behind him and caught him in a rear choke hold. He felt reality start to dim, which just made the beast more angry.

“ _ Kylo, _ Rey needs you, _ the Scavenger needs you!”  _ Ingalan’s words permeated the choking cloud of dark fury in his mind.  _ Rey. _

He let go of Hux abruptly, ignoring as the cretin scuttled away unsteadily, gasping and wheezing. Kylo tapped Leonmar on the shoulder to let him know he was back and the hold loosened slightly.

He took a deep breath in, then growled, “Okay, I’m back.  _ Let me see her. _ ” Leonmar’s arms fell away and Kylo was scrambling over to Rey.

Her eyes were open, yet she wasn’t moving. Zainmar was by her side, “I can’t get her to respond.” He said frantically. “She’s breathing but I don’t know what’s wrong with her.”

Kylo pulled her up across his knees, cradling her face, “ _ Rey? Rey? Little Scavenger? _ ” He felt panic rise, he looked up at Zainmar, “ _ Ask him. _ Ask him what he did!” He snarled.

Zainmar went to interrogate Hux with the other Knights and Kylo turned back to Rey.  _ “Love?” _ He whispered. Tears leaking from his eyes as he searched her own.

And then there was a whisper, a featherlight touch in his mind.  _ Kylo.  _

He had forgotten about their bond. He took several calming breaths then reached out, finding that spark, that crackle of energy that existed between them. It was there but her’s was  _ so weak. _ So he pulled on his own and fed it into her, pouring strength and light and love.

For a moment nothing happened, then she gasped, back arching against him, arms flung out and then he could feel her, her eyes focused on his, incandescent with rage. She snarled as if she had absorbed some of his beast and struggled out of his arms and stood, her legs slightly wobbly but that only lasted for a second. Then she launched herself at Hux using her entire body to take him down.  _ Stars, he loved this girl. _

Kylo watched as she beat Hux bloody, he wanted to hold her but was afraid that she may not want to be touched right now- he didn’t know the extent of what Hux had done to her. 

And that thought made him go over to help her. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey had lost her mind somewhere between Hux’s heavy breath and wandering hands. Once she was able to stand, all she could think of was that this had gone on  _ too long _ . She was going to  **_END_ ** Hux.

She didn’t have a knife on her, but that would not hold her back, _ nothing  _ would hold her back now. 

He seemed to be dazed and bruised already, unsteady on his feet, hissing at the Knights who surrounded him. It didn’t matter, she barreled through them and launched herself at him using her weight to bring him down, she straddled his chest and used her fists to break his incredulous face.

She had just felt the beautiful crunch of his nose breaking when other fighting broke out and it became a full on brawl. 

She started to dig her thumbs into his eyes, planning on popping them and entering his brain when someone large pulled her off him. She snarled, twisting and punching them in the short ribs, the bladder and stamping down on their instep.

Their grip on her loosened as they bellowed in pain and surprise and she dived back at Hux who was being helped to his feet by others. She didn’t bother assessing faces, it didn’t matter who was in her way, what mattered was how big they were and what she would do to get through them.

She didn’t need weapons,  _ she was one _ , in this moment, all she was,  _ was vengeance.  _

The world blurred and faded and there was just her, her fists and feet, elbows and knees, teeth and nails. She had never had the luxury of fighting fair and she didn’t have any motivation to employ it now.

It was just her, whoever got in her way and her target. 

**_Hux._ **

**Fucking Hux.**

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

To Kylo’s disappointment, Poe and his friends arrived and started breaking the two warring groups apart.

Kylo hadn’t let the beast take control this time and held up his hands, letting Fradiani go, when Brobard approached them cautiously.

Fradiani stumbled up, staggering away over to the milling group of Hux’s followers, which was decidedly larger than the five Knights and Rey.

“What the fuck happened?” Brobard asked as Kylo zeroed in on Rey who was beating the shit out of Waykamr in an effort to get to Hux.

“Hux attacked Rey.” He said as he watched Finn and Poe approach Rey tentatively. “I’m not sure they should touch her.” He said to Brobard. “She kind of lost it.”

_ “No shit.” _ Brobard replied sounding somewhat awed. “Maybe  _ you _ should go talk to her?”

Kylo nodded and flexed his fists and rolled his shoulders as he called the other Knights to him and they went to handle Rey together.

Finn looked at him wide eyed as he walked up beside him, “What the hell happened? She can’t seem to hear us.”

Kylo almost laughed, “No, she won’t be able to.” He tossed over his shoulder as he and the Knights surrounded her and after a nod Kylo pulled her off a bleeding Waykamr and they helped him pin her down, chest on the ground, being careful how they touched her.

She hissed at them, struggling with all her wiry strength and fury. _ “Rey? Rey? It’s time to stop.”  _ He told her softly, pulling on their bond,  _ “You’re safe. I have you.”  _ She snarled at him, feral, savage. He reached out to her through their bond, siphoning off some of her battle madness into himself, straining as he pushed it inside the cage he’d built for the beast.

Her body quieted slowly, her breathing calmed. She glared up at him.  _ “Hux needs to die.”  _ She stated it as fact, and he was tempted to agree with her when he remembered her history... she had killed before. This threat from her meant more than from anyone else, because she really did mean it. It didn’t bother him, he knew when he first arrived he would have ripped Hux’s head off if he hadn’t been stopped, but if she succeeded, she’d go to jail for a long time, and he couldn’t allow that.

He sighed and nodded to the others to let her up, “Not tonight.” He answered as she stood, swaying, then her legs gave way. Kylo caught her before she hit the ground, cradling her against his body but not holding her too tightly in case itf made her feel trapped.

_ “Peanut!”  _ Finn shouldered through the Knights, hand reaching out to take hers, “Are you okay?  _ What happened?” _

Rey mustered a tired smile at him before her head fell against Kylo’s chest, eyes fluttering as they closed. Finn turned frightened eyes on Kylo as her hand slipped from his. “I think she’ll be okay,” Kylo found himself saying to Finn. “She needs to rest. I’ll take her back to the dorm now. We can fill you in later.”

Kylo left the others to their own devices and he set off back to the dorm with Rey held safely in his arms, the Knights surrounding him like an honour guard.

 

~ ~ ~

“Do you know what “nemesis” means? _ A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. _ Personified in this case by an ‘orrible c**t… me.”   
~ Brick Top Polford, in the movie ‘Snatch’.   
  


~ ~ ~   
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Don’t worry, they aren’t done with Hux yet.
> 
> Again please, if you have been affected by any of this and need to talk to someone, comment me your email address and we can chat, I can delete the comment before it is posted so no one will see you ask or see your email address. I suffered a similar assault when I was twelve, but no one came to save me. I’m not mentioning this because I want pity, but so you know that if you need to talk about something similar happening to you, I will understand.
> 
> Titles are lyrics taken from two songs, Beast In Black by Beast In Black and Sex Metal Barbie By In This Moment. I also had Revenge by Aviators in my head (lyrics are very relevant) and Familiar Taste of Poison by Halestorm (lyric less relevant).
> 
> Next chapter should be *hopefully* on Saturday X


	47. Leave Us Not Little, Nor Yet Dark

Once Kylo and the Knights were out of earshot of anyone else Ingalan asked, “Okay, how do you want to do this? We’re clearly all banged up and carrying a girl whose clothing is ripped and is unconscious. I’d be surprised if people haven’t already made it to the dorm before us and we don’t know what they’ve said.”

Kylo sighed, he was exhausted, terror it seemed, was as tiring as fighting and the drag on his body and mind as the adrenaline left his system wasn’t helping him think. All he wanted to do was get Rey up to her room, tend to her injuries and fall asleep next to her.

But of course things were not going to be that simple.

“One of us could go ahead and do some reconnaissance.” Leonmar said into the silence.

Kylo nodded, “That may be a good idea. Perhaps two would be better, you may need to split up and you’ll get it done quicker. Leonmar, you and Ingalan if you wouldn’t mind, we’ll pause here, one of you come back to fill us in and the other stay around to monitor developments.”

They nodded and moved off silently and swiftly into the night. Kylo settled carefully on the ground, curling Rey into his lap as he sat. “Zainmar, could you please go and retrieve both our jackets? They are probably still where we were sitting, at the edge of the pit.”

“Sure,” Zainmar said, his usually easy grin nowhere in sight, he hesitated before saying, “She’ll be alright, won’t she? We got there in time, before he could... “ He trailed off unhappily. 

“I think so.” Kylo said quietly and Zainmar nodded and moved off toward the pit.

Javiell settled a few feet away, eyes moving ceaselessly for any sign of movement in the darkness. “We got some information out of Hux before things went south. The details weren’t a hundred percent clear but it sounds like Ismasta gave the Scavenger to a pre-spiked drink. Hux claimed it was Ismasta’s idea, said he wanted to hurt the Scavenger for humiliating him when she turned him down. Either way, the fight at the firepit was obviously to distract you. It’s a good thing you have that weird connection with her, otherwise this would have ended… well, differently.”

Kylo nodded in acknowledgement at Javiell then closed his eyes.  _ Why hadn’t he realised? How had he not worked that out before the fight? _ **_He was so fucking stupid._ ** _ He’d even seen Ismasta and Hux talking, yet hadn’t put two and two together. _

He didn’t let himself even think about what would have happened if he and Rey had not had their bond. That way, madness lay and it would do no good to think about the ‘what ifs’.

Zainmar returned with their jackets quickly, “There are still some people down there, but rumour is rife. There’s no way this can be contained.”

Javiell frowned, “Why would it need to be? We didn’t do anything wrong, we merely defended ourselves, then Rey.”

Zainmar shrugged, “Maybe so, but we, at least Kylo and the Scav- no, Rey did the most damage. There’s no sign of Ismasta down there and no one seemed to know if he’d gone back to the dorm or not.”

Rey muttered and shifted in Kylo’s arms, emitting a small whimper and curling herself into his body as if trying to escape something. 

Zainmar and Javiell looked at her unhappily, then at Kylo. “Whatever happens, I am not leaving her side tonight.” He said and they nodded as if that were obvious. His heart warmed slightly at their reaction. They saw her as one of them. _ And she was.  _

He studied as much of her as he could see in the darkness, he wanted to examine her properly but not here, and not while she clearly needed to cling to something and feel safe as she slept.

He knew he had burned out of her system most of whatever had been in the spiked drink when he… used their bond and the _ power _ that existed between them to heal her, but then she had fought in such a frenzy that she must be injured.

He couldn’t remember if her top had been torn and ripped by Hux or after she had been revived. He shuddered as he remembered the sight of Hux on top of her as she lay still, pinned  beneath Hux’s body, his hands and mouth on her silent, vulnerable form.

_ He should tell his Mother what happened _ … but what if they did tests to see what she had been spiked with and found nothing in her system? There was no way to say, but this could not be allowed to lie, and the sooner she was tested, the more likely there would be something there to find.

He sighed in resignation and was just about to ask Zainmar to go and fetch Mara when Chewie galloped up to them. The huge animal seemed to have a nimbus, the starlight illuminating him, golden eyes gleaming as he padded to a slow walk and dropped his head down to huff worriedly in Rey’s face.

“Chewie?” Kylo said, frowning in surprise, Han alway kept him in at night. “What the hell is going on?” Came a gruff voice out of the darkness, and Han loped up to them, in rumpled clothes with the haggard look of a man pulled too early from a drink induced sleep. “Is that the Scavenger? What the hell happened?” Chewie whined at him, looking back and forth between Rey and Han.

Kylo sighed again, “Something bad happened, can you… Can you go and get Mum?”

Everyone looked at him in surprise, even Chewie. “And maybe Luke.” He added for good measure.

Han rubbed his stubble lined jaw then nodded and looked at Chewie, “Go get Luke.” He told the dog, who dipped his head then cantered off into the night. Han gave Kylo another careful look before going off to fetch Leia.

“Are you sure about this?” Zainmar asked quietly, “Don’t you want to sleep on it first?”

Kylo shook his head, “We need to get a march on whatever Hux comes up with. If we stay silent, when we do speak it will seem less believable.”

They nodded, “You two don’t have to stay, no point in all of us missing out on sleep, and Rey and I did most of the damage, no point in you taking rap for it too.” He meant it, but just received glares in return.

Leonmar arrived, breaking the tension and the three of them looked up at him expectantly. He sat down with them, “It’s pandemonium up there, Hux arrived shortly after Ingalan and I, face gushing blood and yelling that you tried to kill him, Kylo. Ismasta has stuck himself to Mara as if he knows everyone is out to get him and there are rumours flying around like bullets at a gun show. Ingalan stayed to keep an eye on Hux and Ismasta. There is no way we are getting Rey in without her being seen at this point.”

Kylo nodded absently, “Change of plan; Luke and Leia are on their way here. I don’t think this can be contained and we need to do as much damage control as we can.”

Leonmar looked surprised and was just opening his mouth to comment when the sound of paws and feet came to them, followed swiftly by Chewie and Luke.

Luke took in the scene calmly as he pulled to a stop and Chewie lay down next to Kylo, nose resting on Rey’s leg.

“What happened?” Luke said as he joined them on the floor, “Chewie was very insistent, though I was already on my way to your dorm as Mara had called me for assistance.

Kylo took a breath to explain when he paused, turning to his right as he felt a presence draw near, Luke mirrored him, his eyebrows raised as if he knew who it would be and he was surprised.

Of course it was Kylo’s Mother. Somehow looking immaculate despite the late hour, not a hair out of place, it was even more obvious when you compared her to Han following slightly behind her.

Leia took him in, face as unreadable as ever then to Kylo’s surprise, she settled on the floor on his left and moved his arm to look at Rey’s face.

“What happened?” She asked, voice quiet but firm. 

Kylo wished he’d had time to discuss with the others exactly how much they should explain, all of it or just tonight? Certainly not the scar on his face at least, he swallowed and Zainmar caught his eye, “May as well tell them all of it.” He said quietly and the other two nodded. Kylo sighed, again, then looked up at Leia, “This is Rey... she’s my girlfriend... Ismasta Barspo spiked her drink this evening on Hux’s orders, Hux’s friends then started a fight with us,” He gestured to himself and the other Knights, “To distract us. When we had gotten out of it, we found Hux had taken Rey from where I had left her…” He swallowed, the anger and fear he was reliving causing bile to rise in the back of his throat, “He had taken her… When we found them, he was… he was..” Kylo couldn’t, _ just couldn't  _ carry on, and Rey whimpered again in his arms, though still out of it. Chewie made a low, prolonged grumbling growl that was almost inaudible. 

Zainmar cleared his throat, “When we found him, he was on top of Rey who was unresponsive. He was kissing her and… had his hands inside her top and was trying to get her trousers down… We stopped him, pulled him off. Kylo may have hurt him a bit. Rey was… she was breathing and her eyes were open but it was like she wasn’t there,” He swallowed himself, “Kylo got her to wake up and she, well, she kinda lost it and had a go at Hux, I think she broke his nose but he _ deserved it. _ ” He ended frankly, and no one disagreed.

Kylo cleared his throat again, “This isn’t the first time he has attacked her, there are three previous times… she didn’t fall down the stairs last week… he’s also just been harassing her, and he’s been threatening me over her too…”

There was a silence and he looked at the adults’ faces, there was a pause. “Joselor will need to examine her,” Leia said at last, almost gently. “Do you know what it was they put in her drink?”

They all shook their heads, Leia looked at Luke, who nodded and got up, moving off towards the dorm with a purposeful stride.

“We need to take her to the nurse’s office.” Leia said as she brushed hair away from Rey’s face tenderly. But Kylo shook his head emphatically. “No.” He said firmly, she looked up at him in surprise and he explained before she could say anything, “Hux… molested her the last time she was there, I don’t want her in that room again.” 

Leia raised her eyebrow at his tone but a look of disgust rippled over her face, “You mean while she was ill, fevered?” Kylo nodded mutely.

She looked at Han and to Kylo’s surprise said, “I really have had it with that  _ horrible child _ .” Her voice was angry, but the words have a ring of overuse, as if this were not the first, or even the tenth time she had said it. Han merely nodded at her.

Leia sighed, smoothing her face, “In that case, let’s take her back to her room then. I imagine Joselor is on her way to the dorm as we speak. Come along then Kylo, do you need help carrying her?”

He unconsciously gripped Rey tighter to him, “No.” He said and stood, with barely a wobble, then started walking towards the dorm. Javiell steadied him surreptitiously as he walked- he was exhausted but  _ he would not let her go. _

All the lights were on but any students who were not injured were gone, presumably sent to bed by Mara, Stold and Luke.

The wounded were sitting at tables in the common area as their hurts were tended to by each other or Mara. Numerous med kits sat on the tables. Ismasta was sitting in a corner, very much on his own. He blanched when he saw Kylo enter with Rey, then went whiter still when he saw Leia, Han and Chewie.

Chewie paused to glare at him, lip curling away from his teeth. Deep down, a tiny part of Kylo was amused by Ismasta’s face, he looked like he was about to piss himself.  _ Good.  _ If Kylo had his way, it would be the last time he was able to piss without a catheter. 

Hux was in another corner, on his own also, face bloodied and looking up at Luke as Luke frowned down at him, talking softly.

Everyone looked up as they entered, expressions varying- curiosity, anger resentment, fear and concern mainly showing on tired, dirty faces.

Kylo ignored everyone and went straight through to the kitchen then into the lobby and started up the stairs, but stopped when Leia put a hand on his arm. “Han and I can take her up from here.” She said, not unkindly.

Kylo was having none of it. “Anywhere she goes, I go. I am  _ NOT _ leaving her again.” Her mouth and eyes tightened but to Kylo’s surprise Han put a hand on her arm.

“I think that may be best, Leia.” He said quietly, but in a firm voice. Kylo shot him a thankful look and he nodded imperceptibly when Leia looked back at Kylo.

“Very well.” She said shortly, “I will go and ask Mara where Rey’s room is.” She glided off before Kylo could let slip that he knew. Which was very lucky indeed.

Chewie grumbled a whine at Han who nodded, “Chewie will stay with her tonight too.” He said and the dog gave a satisfied huff. 

Leia came back and led the way up the stairs, Kylo nodded to the other Knights, then followed her, Han and Chewie coming up behind them, though Chewie surged ahead of them and then led the way, following his nose unerringly till he came to Rey’s room.

Kylo carefully lay Rey on the bare mattress, then turned to pick up a pillow to put under her head, only to see Han and Leia standing in the doorway, frowning at the nest of bedding on the floor.

Kylo smiled a tiny bit at that, “She sleeps on the floor,” He told them, “The mattress is too soft for her.”

His parents looked at each other, as if they too could communicate without words and Kylo went about making Rey look as comfortable as possible, taking her boots off and covering her in a duvet, then sat down on the floor next to where her head rested.

He looked up to see his parents watching him, their expressions strange, as if they had found something they didn’t know how to react to.

Chewie had been standing by the window as Kylo had gone about his task but now he climbed up onto the bed and lay his long body between Rey and the wall, groaning in satisfaction as he settled. Rey turned over in her sleep and muttered, a small smile appearing on her lips.

Leia frowned at Chewie, who regarded her steadily, and she sighed in defeat.

“Okay, Kylo, you and Han need to go outside and shut the door for a moment, I need to... have a closer look at her.”

Kylo swallowed at what her words implied and opened his mouth to argue but saw Han shake his head at him from behind his Mother.

He sighed heavily but got to his feet, he was lucky to even be allowed up here, and he didn’t want his Mother to change her mind about that; so he acquiesced as gracefully as he could and went outside with his father.

The door closed behind them and they stood awkwardly in the dim corridor for a moment, then Han said, somewhat awkwardly, “Why don’t you go and clean up in the bathroom? You’re pretty battered as well, son.”

Kylo nodded and headed wearily down the hall, he relieved himself then washed his hands and face. His face looked haggard in the mirror, his shirt was torn, his jeans were filthy and his face and fists had cuts and bruises on, his body probably bore them too. None of it mattered though. So long as Rey was safe. Nothing else mattered.

 

 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry this is a day late!
> 
> Songs in my head: ‘Nothing Else Matters’ by Metallica and ‘Cruelty’ by The Cruxshadows.
> 
> Title is taken from the book, ‘The Box of Delights’ by John Masefield, for some reason, it seemed to fit this chapter.
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3
> 
> I also posted a new oneshot, Emancipation, if you’re interested...


	48. But Tonight, It's Heavy Stuff

 

Rey was being consumed by crushing darkness when a light touch pulled her out of it. A gentle hand was smoothing the hair away from her face, and a calm vaguely familiar voice was saying her name.

There was a warm, comforting presence pressed against her right side. She blinked in the light, her head throbbed in time with her heartbeat as she tried to focus her blurry vision and work out where she was. _Where was Kylo?_ She felt panic rise in her chest, then a warm heavy nose wuffled in her hair and her fear lessened, _Chewie._

“Rey? Are you awake?” The voice asked again and Rey blinked as things finally came into focus. She was in her room but couldn’t remember how she got there. She tried to sit up, only to find herself dizzy and nauseous as the world seemed to pulse around her.

Gentle hands supported her, helping her rise to a sitting position, the hands turned out to belong to Leia,  or Mrs. Organa. Rey frowned in confusion. “Wha?” She cleared her raw throat and tried again. “What’s going on? Where’s Kylo?”

_Light!_ _Her head hurt._ In fact her whole body did, she felt as if she were one giant bruise. Leia handed her a glass of water and said carefully, “What do you remember?”

Rey took a mouthful of water before responding, “What do you mean? I was…” She frowned, she seemed to be missing something, there were holes in her memories. She shook her head, “We were at the fire pit… there was a fight, then…” She scrunched up her nose as she tried to piece images together. “Then Hux...” Bile rose in her throat and she took a shuddering breath.

Chewie whined and thrust his head under her hand, she looked down at him, his steady gaze lending her strength. _“I couldn’t move.”_ She whispered to him, unable to look at Leia.

There was a soft knock on the door and she looked up to see Joselor enter, then close the door behind her. The nurse’s face was grim, though she quickly smoothed her expression when she noticed Rey’s eyes on her.

Leia stood up from the chair she had dragged over to the side of the bed. “Rey, we need to examine you, can you stand?”

Rey swung her legs slowly down to the floor and stood cautiously, unsure what to do next, she looked at Leia.

“I need you to strip down to your underwear.” Joselor said. Rey felt her hackles rise. “Why?” She asked, her voice stronger than it had been since she awoke.

Joselor looked uncomfortably at Leia, “We need to examine your injuries, Rey. And we need to… see the extent of Hux’s assault.”

Rey swallowed thickly and shook her head, “He didn’t… Kylo got there before he could…” She trailed off, cheeks burning as she looked at the floor.

Leia moved closer and went to put a comforting hand on Rey’s arm but stopped when Rey flinched slightly. “Your memory seems to be impaired, Rey. We need to check.”

Rey looked up at her face, “But wouldn't I know? Wouldn’t I… feel it?” She whispered, the strength having left her voice again.

The pity and compassion in Leia’s face _hurt_ her. She turned away and took her top off, then shucked her trousers as quickly as she could. _The faster this was over the better._

The two women made horrified noises and Rey turned back around, hiding her brand. She had forgotten about it _again._ She clenched her fists at her sides and dug her fingernails into her palms as hard as she could.

~ ~ ~

It was one of the most humiliating experiences of her life. But they confirmed what she had thought, _what she had hoped._ He hadn’t got that far.

Joselor then tended to the cuts and abrasions she had sustained, then allowed Rey to dress in her sleep t-shirt and pyjama trousers before leading her to the bathroom to pee in a vial. Yet another humiliation. But at least she was able to wash her face and clean her teeth, though she would have liked a shower too.

When she was back in her room, Rey sat on the bed and cuddled Chewie, his presence a curiosity that she couldn’t be bothered to ask about. He was warm and comforting and that was what mattered.

Joselor left and Leia sat on the chair again, then said carefully, “Would you like to see Kylo?”

Rey’s head snapped up in surprise, she didn’t get a chance to answer though as the door burst open, making both her and Leia jump and Kylo strode in, but he paused a few steps from her, suddenly looking unsure.

The relief at his presence was like a blow to the stomach, and Rey’s eyes spilled over as a painful sob escaped her chest. Their bond swelled between them and he closed the distance, his hesitation gone.

He gathered her into his arms as if she were a child, holding her tightly against him as he rocked, whispering wordlessly, lips pressed against her hair.

All the walls between them faded to nothing, and they existed together, melded perfectly as one.

The safety that she felt was like a sedative, and she slipped softly into sleep cradled in his arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The relief at seeing Rey awake and lucid was like a wave crashing into him, and when she didn’t flinch away from him, when their connection showed him she wasn’t afraid of him, it was all Kylo could do embrace her.

He didn’t care his Mother was watching. _Rey was okay_. His little Scavenger was okay.

~ ~ ~

A soft touch on his arm surprised him and he looked up to see his Leia standing next to him. “She is asleep.” She said softly, “And you look like you need to sleep also.” He agreed silently but shook his head, “I’m not leaving her. I won’t.”

Leia looked up helplessly at Han who stood in the doorway. “Just let him stay, Leia. I don’t see what harm it will do. And if she wakes to find him gone, I think she may panic.”

Leia looked back at Kylo, face unreadable then nodded slightly and sighed, “I will see you when you wake.” She said, voice still gentle. His parents left, closing the door softly behind them.

Kylo settled on the floor, pulling the bedding off the bed again and settling it round them before pulling Rey against his body. Chewie got up off the bed and lay on Rey’s other side with a small groan of satisfaction.

Kylo’s exhaustion pulled him under almost immediately, and he was glad that Chewie would be there to watch over them as they finally slept.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

When Rey next woke, her head didn’t hurt as much as it had and she was very, _very warm._ Kylo’s arm was protectively wrapped around her, holding her tightly against him as he slept. She blinked in the dim light that permeated the closed curtain and found herself looking into Chewie’s pale eyes. He smiled at her, ears going back and there was the thumping sound of a tail briefly wagging in greeting.

The clock on the wall said 12.48. She wasn’t certain what time she had gone to sleep but even so, it was late in the day.

She smiled as she reached out a hand to pet Chewie and winced when she felt her aching muscles protest at the movement. As she pulled Chewie’s ears she suddenly realised the fact that Kylo was asleep in her room… _How had that happened? And why was Chewie here?_ Not that she was complaining, this was currently one of the best situations she had ever found herself in.

But it was an odd situation all the same. Kylo muttered something and she attempted to turn in his arms so she could see his face, but his hold on her was too tight.

Her body informed her she was hungry and thirsty and needed to pee but she couldn’t bring herself to wake him. When he entered the room last night he had looked beyond exhausted. _He had saved her._ The events were still fuzzy in her mind but she dimly remembered Kylo pulling her out of the drug induced paralysis her body had been trapped in.

Anger coiled through her at that memory, and Chewie gave a low rumbling growl as if he knew what she was thinking.

Kylo shifted, she could feel his mind trying to surface in response to her anger and she pushed it down, hoping he would sleep on.

As she lay there, she tried piecing every thought and memory together. It made her wonder if Finn was okay and she felt guilty about not rushing downstairs to check, but the thought of seeing other people right now made her feel ill. She wasn’t ready for that, she would either end up crying or lashing out. And she _would not_ cry in public, it was bad enough she’d done it last night.

Kylo made a small noise of distress in his throat and she reached down to stroke his hand. At the contact she was sucked into his mind. And into his nightmare.

~ ~ ~

Rey found herself bound and gagged, attached to a large bed. Hux stood over her wielding a knife as he delicately sliced her clothing off her body in small strips. He laughed maniacally as he did so. She followed his gaze as he looked over to where Kylo was, bound by thick chains, utterly helpless as he watched Hux toy with her.

After the initial wave of terror that rose up inside Rey, she remembered that _this was a dream._ And because she knew that, she could change it.

She calmed her breathing, and concentrated on what she wanted. The air shimmered, like a mirage, then rippled as she changed it. Hux disappeared and Rey stood fully clothed with Kylo standing unbound in front of her. He looked around in confusion, “What just happened?” He asked, voice still thick from his terror.

Rey reached up to grasp his chin so he would look at her. “This is a dream.” She told him calmly. “Just a dream.”

Kylo was smaller in his dreams she noticed, less powerful, shorter and more slender, almost vulnerable. She wrapped her arms around him protectively, sighing as she rested her head on his shoulder.

He hesitantly returned the embrace, tension still evident in his posture and muscles.

Rey wasn’t sure where she could take him in the dream so that he would feel safe, but didn’t want to try rifling through his memories to find somewhere good as that felt too invasive.

So she took him to Jakku, pulling him along with her as she stepped into the desert sun, at the top of one of the highest sand dunes around.

He blinked in the searing light and returned her smile as she looked up at him. “Is this Jakku?” He asked, looking around and seeing nothing but sand. Rey grinned, oddly happy to be there.

“Yup. And I am going to show you one of my favourite things to do.” Two sandboards appeared next to them, _being able to consciously manipulate dreams was fun._

Kylo looked quizzically at them, then her as she picked one up. “We are going to slide down the dune on these.”

“Wait, _what?_ Are you serious? It’s too steep!” He said incredulously. Rey just grinned even more, “Don’t believe me? Just watch.” And before he could stop her, she’d sat down, gripped the strap in one hand and pushed off with the other.

His strangled shout of alarm cut off as she whooped with pure joy, laughing as the speed she was going made wind whip at her hair.

A moment later, she heard him shout, “ _Shit!”_ As he followed her down, then heard surprised laughter bubble out of him too.

~ ~ ~

 

When Rey woke again, it was with a grin on her face. _Stars! But she had needed that!_ Amazingly, she felt like she could face anything now. She could feel as Kylo surfaced too, his arm loosened and he turned her so she faced him and gave her a sweet, lingering kiss. Rey sighed happily.

“How are you?” He asked in a careful voice. Rey smiled, “I’m fine. Well I ache, a lot. And I really need a shower, but I’m okay… Though I still want to kill him, Hux I mean.”

He nodded then searched her face for a moment, before appearing satisfied and pulled her to him, wrapping his arms protectively around her.

“Kylo… _Thank you_ .” She said softly into his chest, “Thank you for getting there in time.” He gripped her tighter, a slight growl emanating from his chest before he said in a disgusted voice, “Don’t thank me. It shouldn’t have happened at all. I should have known. _I’m so sorry._ ” His voice sounded broken and she couldn’t bear it. She shook her head, then wriggled in his arms until they loosed enough so she could take his face in her hands and look him in the eyes. He looked so pained, so guilty. “Don’t say that! If anything, _I_ should have known, I shouldn’t have let it happen… But it’s in the past and there’s nothing we can do about it. What matters is that _you saved me.”_

He made a grumbling noise so she kissed him to shut him up. It would have been nice to carry on, to just stay there together but Chewie stood up and yawned loudly, which made Rey wonder how long he had been here and if he needed a loo break. Which in turn reminded her that she now desperately had to pee.

So they got up, unsure how to proceed under such odd circumstances, but before they could debate what to do, a knock on the door stopped them.

Kylo was still fully dressed minus his boots, so he answered, then opened the door wider so Leia could enter, bearing a tray of food.

“Ah, you’re awake. Kylo, you should probably go back to your dorm to shower and change, there is a meal there waiting for you now.” She said as she placed the laden tray in her hands on Rey’s desk.

Kylo looked uncertainly at Rey and she gave him a reassuring smile. “Meet you downstairs after food and a shower?” She asked and he nodded reluctantly, turning to go.

“Are you sure you feel okay to go downstairs, Rey?” Leia asked carefully, “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

But Rey shook her head, “I want to see Finn, see my friends.” Leia studied her for a moment then nodded. “As you wish, though I need to talk to you after your shower and before you go downstairs, please.”

Rey nodded reluctantly, then shot a smile at Kylo as he left. Chewie made a grumbling noise at Leia who sighed, “I will take Chewie out for a short walk, then he will come back. Apparently, he is going to stay by your side today.”

Rey blinked at that, but when she looked at Chewie she found herself nodding. There was something, _other_ about his pale eyes. It was more than the intelligence you saw in a normal dog.

Rey scrubbed herself three times over in the shower before being satisfied that she was clean. The water felt wonderful, even though it stung her cuts and abrasions.

The details of the brawl after Kylo had pulled her out were somewhat vague, things were blurred through the red veil of fury she had felt at the time. But she was pretty sure she had got off lightly though, nothing was broken or even sprained. She wondered how much damage she had inflicted on Hux and his lackeys, and found herself hoping it was more than she bore on her own body.

She had just finished dressing when a scrabbling noise and a whine at the door announced Chewie’s return. Rey opened the door for him, smiling as he shoved his nose into her hand affectionately.

Leia was a few steps behind and came in too, she sat on the bare mattress and gestured to the tray of food. “Eat, you must be hungry.”

Rey dug in, too hungry to feel awkward about eating in front of Leia. Chewie settled on his haunches, eyes intent on the tray of food and Rey.

“Due to the extenuating circumstances, you and Kylo and your friends are not going to be punished for your part in the violence that occured last night.” She said carefully.

Rey stopped eating and looked at her in surprise, it hadn’t even occurred to her that they may be punished for what they had done… _although_ perhaps her deeds after Kylo had woken her may have been extreme in the eyes of people from Canto Bight.

“Ismasta Barspo confessed to his actions and has been expelled, he has already been collected by his parents… I am sorry to say that Armitage Hux has not yet been found guilty. Although there are witnesses to his assault on you, he has witnesses that contradict yours, and he claims to have no knowledge of what Ismasta planned to do.”

Leia paused as Rey made a noise of incredulity. Rey hastily swallowed her mouthful and said, _“He what?”_ In a voice that seethed with fury.

Chewie growled beside her, eyes reflecting her anger. Leia’s mouth thinned, but Rey didn’t get the feeling she was angry at her. “He will be watched closely from now on, and is prohibited from talking or interacting with you at all.”

Rey couldn’t think of anything to say that wouldn’t be classed as swearing… _And yet,_ this meant she could get her own revenge. At that thought, part of her was slightly sorry Ismasta had gone.

She took a deep, calming breath in, then started eating again.

Leia sighed and stood, “Are you sure you feel up to coming downstairs?” She asked and Rey looked up at her to nod.

Leia’s lips twitched and Rey was surprised to see a hint of mischief in her eyes, “You will no doubt be glad to know that you broke Hux’s nose quite badly.”

Rey’s eyebrows shot up at that and she grinned, suddenly liking Leia a lot. Leia gave her a small smile in return. “I will see you tomorrow then. If you have any concerns or suddenly feel unwell, tell Mara immediately, okay?”

Rey nodded, then went back to her food as Leia shut the door behind her. Once she had left, Rey turned to grin at Chewie and presented him with the piece of chicken she had put aside for him. He inhaled it and returned her grin happily.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Title is taken from lyrics to Slam by Pendulum
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3 
> 
> If you are interested I posted a drabble called Alone Now... (yeah, I know, shameless self promotion!)


	49. Breathing Space

 

Kylo was surprised to find Luke at the bottom of the stairs, chatting to Mara. They looked up at him as he entered the lobby.

He was even more surprised when Mara patted his hand affectionately before leaving him alone with Luke. “What was that about?” He said, staring after her as she went into the kitchen.

“Let’s talk in your room, shall we?” Luke said rather ominously and started up the stairs. Kylo frowned and followed.

When they reached his room they found the Knights all there, Kylo nodded to them as he walked in and sat down on his empty chair and looked up expectantly at Luke.

“I need to talk to Kylo alone, you boys clear out.” Luke said, though not unkindly.

The Knights looked at Kyo and he shook his head, “Whatever you have to say to me can be said in front of them.” He told his uncle firmly.

Luke raised his eyebrows but nodded and shut the door behind him. “You aren’t going to like this.” He said tiredly as he sat down on the bed. “But it was the best your mother and I could do. Ismasta Barspo has been expelled, he confessed to spiking the drink he gave to Rey. He has already left the school.” The Knights murmured at that, but Kylo just waited, clearly this was not the thing he wouldn’t be unhappy about.

“Armitage Hux denied everything and has witnesses that contradict yours. He and his friends have a week of detention for the fight that broke out at the pit as there were too many witnesses for that. However, other than being told to stay away from Rey and not being allowed to interact with her at all, that is as far as it goes.”

The Knights erupted around Kylo, their outrage making them forget that Luke was their teacher. Kylo just closed his eyes and breathed. A tiny part of him had suspected Hux would get away with this. Yet the confirmation still sent him reeling. The beast inside uncoiled in his chest and he threw up a wall between Rey and himself so she hopefully wouldn’t feel it.

A hand gripped his shoulder comfortingly and he opened his eyes to see Ingalan looking at him. He gave a slight nod, to let Ingalan know he was handling it. “And what of us?” He asked Luke as the others fell silent.

Luke scrubbed his hands through his hair, an unusual gesture of frustration. “You’re all off the hook, mostly thanks to your mother. Rey too.”

“Why the hell would anyone even consider punishing Rey?!” Zainmar asked disgustedly. The others echoed him. Luke looked unhappy, “She broke Hux’s nose. Badly. She also inflicted quite a lot of other injuries on his friends.”

Kylo breathed carefully and Luke looked at him. “You’re going to have to keep a lid on your temper, Kylo. This feud, this war _has to stop._ ”

Kylo snarled. “How can I stop when literally all of this shit has been instigated by Hux and not us?”

Luke looked at him flatly, “I find that hard to believe Kylo, you’ve had issues with each other for years now.”

Ingalan frowned at Luke, “That may be so, but recently, at least ever since Rey turned up, we have just been reacting. Kylo’s right.” The others nodded.

Luke sighed, “Just try and stay out of it, okay? He shouldn’t be going anywhere near Rey so you shouldn’t have anymore problems. If you do, you tell Mara, Me or Leia. _Is that clear?”_ He looked at each of them in turn, waiting for their nods of agreement.

Anger flared inside Kylo but he nodded anyway, the sooner Luke was gone the sooner he could eat, shower and discuss things properly with the others.

Luke got up to leave but paused at the door, “You lads did well last night.” He told them, then left, closing the door behind him.

There was a pause as they waited for a moment for him to start down the stairs.

“How’s Rey doing?” Leonmar asked after a moment. “She’ll be okay.” Kylo said heavily. “Though we may have to keep an eye on her so she doesn’t end up killing Hux the next time she sees him… You should probably know… He wouldn’t be her first.” He looked up at them to see the shock on their faces, Zainmars mouth was hanging open and Leonmar’s eyes were like saucers. “You _cannot_ tell that to _anyone_ though. _Including Rey._ ”

Javiell swallowed, _“Well shit.”_ The others nodded wordlessly. Kylo shifted in his chair to start on the tray of food, he changed the subject, still uncertain whether he should have told them that at all. “Anything happen while I was gone? Any fallout other than what Luke just mentioned?”

“Not much, it’s been pretty quiet today, everyone is treading lightly… Though you’ll be pleased to hear that when Ismasta left, he was pretty beat up. Rumour is that Poe and his friends got hold of him during the night.” Ingalan said with a small smile.

Kylo nodded in satisfaction, that was something at least. “Hux hasn’t yet left his room, guess he is laying low and licking his wounds. Some of his lackeys have been around but they steered clear of us.” Javiell added.

“Is Rey really okay?” Zainmar asked, “She isn’t injured? Did you stay with her all night?”

“As okay as can be. I used our bond to burn most of what was in that drink out of her system. She only has cuts and bruises, same as me. I don’t know how okay she’ll be when she next sees Hux though... And yeah, I was allowed to stay with her.” He couldn’t keep a soft smile from his face as he said the last. _Light!_ It had felt so good to just sleep with her there in his arms, not worrying about when to climb back over the bloody roof.

“What about you? Any injuries?” He asked as he tried to eat everything as quickly as he could without choking. Javiell scoffed, “No, same as you, just cuts, bruises and ripped clothing.”

~ ~ ~

After Kylo had scarfed down as much food as he could hold, he went and had a shower, letting the hot water pound some of the tension from his shoulders as he thought about what Luke had said. Could he really let Hux get away with this without retaliating? The broken nose didn’t seem to be nearly enough punishment for what he had done. The worst thing was that he knew Luke and Leia believed him, and yet they could do nothing. He shook his head irritably, then winced as a wet strand of hair caught him in the eye. Although it was Hux’s last year here, they were only a quarter way through it, and Kylo doubted that Hux would not do anything else before he left…

 

Kylo dressed quickly, just towelling his hair dry and throwing whatever clothes came to his hand first, then headed downstairs to meet the Knights who he’d sent down ahead of him in case Rey got down before he could meet her.

He found Finn, Poe and their friends waiting with the Knights in the lobby, talking quietly to each other as they waited.

Finn broke off when he saw Kylo and moved swiftly to intercept him before Kylo could join the Knights. “Ingalan filled me in.” Finn said softly, though anger bubbled just below the surface. “I just wanted to thank you. For saving her.” He voice broke slightly and he shook his head in annoyance, “She is like my sister. No, _she is my sister._ She is the only family I have. I should have _been there_ and I hate that I wasn’t, and I hate that I ever introduced her to that shit Ismasta... So thank you.” He finished awkwardly, ducking his eyes away from Kylo’s face.

Yet Kylo felt a glimmer of understanding, afterall the Knights were not his kin, but they were his brothers, and he knew Finn was an orphan, so could imagine how that must increase Rey’s importance to him. He shifted his feet uncomfortably, unsure how to respond. “That’s okay.” He said finally, then added, “I hear you got to Ismasta before he left.”

Finn looked up at him at that and gave him a small grin, “Yeah. We did. He isn’t going to sit comfortably for a few weeks… It was the least we could do.”

Kylo nodded, then turned as he heard the ungainly sound of a larger than average wolfhound coming down stairs.

Rey followed after him, dressed in what must have been some of her new clothes, even if the jeans were clearly mens and the hoodie was a least one size too big.

Kylo suddenly realised that sixteen people rushing over to talk to her probably wasn’t such a great idea and he caught Finn’s eye who had evidently just realised the same thing.

Finn gestured at Poe who seemed to understand and raised his voice, “Okay guys, let’s take this in the movie room shall we? I booked it.” And he started towards the corridor, pulling two of his protesting female friends with him.

Kylo nodded to the Knights to follow and he and Finn stayed behind and went over to Rey who was still standing on the stairs, eyes a little wider than normal.

Kylo let Finn reach her first, it hurt, to see how she embraced him, to feel the happiness she felt at seeing her friend. But he pushed the feeling down, after all he had spent all night with her. He could allow this. Chewie’s heavy head pressed against his hip as if the dog knew what he was thinking, he gazed up at him and Kylo smiled down at the dog as he pulled his ears and Chewie groaned happily.

Rey’s hand slipped into his free one and he looked at her, drinking in her face even though he’d seen her barely an hour ago, “Are you sure you’re okay being down here?” He asked her softly and noticed Finn frowning behind her.

“I’ll be fine.” She said airily. Finn crossed his arms. “Peanut, no one will think less of you if you want to go back upstairs.”

Rey shot him a loving but exasperated look over her shoulder. “I’ll be fine. So long as everyone doesn’t stare at me or bombard me with questions, I’ll be fine.. _I have to be._ Fucking Hux is still here and I won’t give him the satisfaction of thinking he frightened me.” She raised her chin and gave Finn and himself flat, determined looks.

Kylo and Finn both sighed at the same time then smirked at each other. Rey rolled her eyes and grabbing Finn’s hand, tugged them towards the movie room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The evening passed quietly, Rey sat between Finn and Kylo on the large sofa, Poe on Finn’s other side and Chewie at her feet. The conversation once it got started, had flowed easily, they didn’t watch a movie but the privacy of the movie room was welcome.

It was nice to just spend time with Kylo without having to sneak around. She snuggled into his side, with his arm around her. Every now and then Finn would touch her, as if to make sure she was still there and still okay.

Despite everything that had happened, Rey realised she was happy. She knew that tomorrow would likely be harder. It would be more difficult to avoid Hux and other students, everyone in the school would be aware of some of it by now. But she’d survive, _that’s what she did._

One of the things that had surprised her and that she had secretly been afraid of, was the reaction of Poe and his friends. After all, they had been friends with Ismasta for a long time, and had only known her less than two weeks. And yet none of them seemed to feel she was to blame, and it even turned out they had had a go at him before he left.

She was greatly amused when Finn told her he’d bruised his knuckles on Ismasta’s face. As she let the conversation wash over her, she turned her thoughts to revenge.

There was absolutely no way she would let Hux get away with this. But whatever she came up with, it had to be subtle, had to be something she, or anyone else could not be easily linked to for she knew if anything were to happen to him, they would be top of the list of suspected perpetrators.

As it turned out, it was Finn who gave her the idea, and it was perfect...

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: OMG writing is going slowly at the moment and I am resisting the urge to just go and watch the new series of iZombie as well as other things that have just arrived on Netflix. But I won’t. This is how much I love you guys. (if you haven't seen iZombie go and watch it, it is amazing).  
> Sorry this it is filler and so short T_T  
> Autonomee is my Beta <3


	50. Biding My Time

_ It was so perfect. _ Hux had played a sneaky, dirty game. He had essentially poisoned her… Well, two can play at that.

“What are you grinning about?” Kylo asked her and Rey jumped guiltily before smoothing her face and looked up at him as innocently as she could. “Just wondering what Hux looks like with a broken nose.”

He raised his eyebrows, clearly skeptical, but Finn spoke before he could question her further. “Well, when I saw him last night he looked pretty bad.” He said and laughed. “He hasn’t come out of his room today so I think it’s fair to say it looks awful.”

Rey allowed herself a grin at that, she could feel Kylo’s suspicion waning as he and Finn talked about what Hux must look like now.

This plan would have to be carried out by Rey alone, she was fairly certain no one else would be happy with what she was planning to do, and the less people who knew the, less likely someone would give her away. She just had to set things up, and it would probably be best to let things settle for a few days too. Luckily, patience was a virtue every scavenger took to heart. And to get this right, she could wait as long as was needed.

She was surprised to find she was tired. Even though she had slept most of the day, she felt like she could sleep for another.

Finn caught her yawning and put his hand on her shoulder softly. “You look like you need to go back to bed, Peanut.”

Kylo turned to look at her fully, “Yes, you do. I can take Chewie out then send him up to you?”

Rey considered protesting but then decided against it. Tomorrow would be bad enough without her being really sleepy on top of everything else. She nodded and got up.

Jess bounced up when she saw Rey stand. “I’m going up too, I’ll come with you.” Rey rolled her eyes but didn’t argue. Everyone murmured ‘Goodnight’ as they left the movie room and Kylo followed them out with Chewie at their heels.

Jess moved to the bottom of the stairs so Rey and Kylo could say goodnight, before Rey went up. It felt odd, kissing him good night in such a public well lit place, but not in a bad way.

“Shall I come over after curfew?” He asked, he looked so tired Rey felt she ought to let him have an uninterrupted night but she couldn’t say no, not tonight anyway. “If you don’t mind.” She answered softly feeling horribly selfish.

His hand skimmed her cheek, “You’re not being selfish, and there is no place I would rather be.” He said just as softly. Rey grimaced as she realised he’d felt that through their bond. “Perhaps we should practice blocking each other out or things may get awkward.” He laughed at that but nodded, kissed her one last time, then went out with Chewie. The dog gave her a reassuring look as he left, almost as if he wanted to make sure she knew he’d be back.

Jess was quiet as they climbed the stairs together, when they got to Rey’s door she said hesitantly, “Rey… We weren’t told any details, just rumours... but if you need someone to talk to… I mean I know you’ve got Finn and Kylo but, if you need to talk to a girl… I’m here.”

Rey swallowed. “Thank you… I’m okay. I’m mainly just angry really.” She gave Jess an awkward smile and to her surprise, Jess flung her arms about her.

Rey patted her back, unsure what else to do or say and Jess stepped back, smiling. “Sorry. I’m just really glad you’re okay. And don’t worry, we’ll come up with a way to make Hux pay.”

Rey blinked in surprise at that then smiled. “That would be good,” She agreed and Jess grinned, gave her another quick hug, then went back down the stairs to her floor.

Chewie arrived not long after Jess had left, and Rey let him in then locked her door. Even with Chewie’s company, she didn’t think she would be able to sleep with the door unlocked.

She settled down in her nest and Chewie happily joined her, his heavy breathing lulling her to sleep quickly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

When Kylo opened Rey’s window he found her fast asleep, curled around Chewie, who’s eyes watched him with interest.

“Hey, Chewie, mind if I join you?” Chewie rolled his eyes and gave a small groan of acceptance. 

Rey stirred a tiny bit as Kylo pulled off his trainers and settled under the duvet with her, she murmured softly, arching her body against his slightly but didn’t fully wake up.

Which was probably a good thing because he suddenly had a raging erection. He wrapped his arms around her and lay his head down, trying to think of anything other than her body pressed against his. Sleep was a long time coming.

When he woke, he blinked in confusion because it was still dark, it took him a moment to realise Chewie was whining softly, eyes glowing in the dim light. Rey’s breathing was ragged, panicked, her body was jerking.  _ Nightmare. _

Kylo turned her over so she was on her back and kissed her, stroking her hair and face, “Rey?” He said softly, “Rey, wake up, it’s okay.  _ I’ve got you. _ ”

Her eyes sprung open and he remembered that first night on the roof, where she’d been somewhere else and pulled a knife on him, or last week when he had woken her and she had sliced his face, it was the same now, though there was thankfully no knife in her hand this time. She started to struggle and he  _ pushed _ calmness at her through their bond.

“Oh!” She rubbed her eyes. “Sorry, did I wake you?” 

Kylo smiled in relief and amusement, “No, I woke you. You were having a bad dream or something.”

She frowned as if trying to remember, then her frown deepened as she did, Kylo caught a brief glimpse and couldn’t help an angry growl escaping his chest.

He pulled her against him, wrapping his arms tightly about her, she froze for a second, then snuggled against him. “It’s okay,” She said softly, “I’m okay.”

Kylo took in a deep breath before relaxing against her, his body felt taut with anger all over again at what Hux was getting away with.

Rey turned in his arms so she could face him and kissed him softly, “Hey, calm down. You need to sleep too.” 

They lay staring at each other, Rey stroking his hair while he traced patterns on her side under her t-shirt. Her eyes slowly closed as he watched and when he was certain she was asleep, he removed his hand.

The feel of her skin had made him hard once more and all he could think of was how much he wanted to make her come again. How much he wanted to watch her body shake, her back arch and hear her moans as he made her orgasm again and again and again and  _ Oh Stars! _ This was  _ not _ going to help him sleep.  _ Shut up brain! _

He sighed in frustration and tried to empty his mind of everything but the need to sleep...

It felt like he’d been asleep for merely moments when her lips woke him again, “It’s morning.” She told him, the regret in her voice echoed inside him.

He sighed and nodded, sitting up for a moment while his body caught up with him, then put his trainers on.

“See you at breakfast?” He asked as he finished kissing her goodbye, she looked at him then shook her head, “You look like you need to sleep in some more. Sorry if I kept you awake.”

He yawned then smiled ruefully, “It wasn’t you, my brain wouldn't switch off. Either way, I will see you for breakfast.” He said firmly, “I’ll just consume a vast amount of coffee.”

He saw her roll her eyes at him as he climbed out the window. The air outside was cold, waking him up unpleasantly and completely. 

When he got back to his room he went and had a hot shower to chase away the goosebumps and take care of himself. Being tired was bad enough without adding horribly horny into the mix too.

His bed looked so inviting, but he knew Hux was an early riser most of the time and seeing as how he seemed to want to hide at the moment, the likelihood of him going downstairs early increased. And there was no way in hell Kylo was going to let that shit weasel anywhere near Rey.

He decided against waking the other Knights but stuck his head in Inagalan’s door to let him know he was going down. 

Ingalan was awake but still in bed reading a physics book. “Just wanted to check in before going down to meet Rey.”

Ingalan immediately put his book down and swung his legs over the bed to get up, “Hey, don’t worry. I doubt Hux will try anything, I’ll see you at breakfast.”

Ingalan gave him an unimpressed look and stood up. “I’ll be down in ten minutes.” He said firmly and went out to the bathroom.

Kylo snorted, then went downstairs. He found Poe, Finn and Rey in the reading room watching what seemed to be a glaring match between Poe’s cat, a small white and orange ball of fluff, and Chewie.

Chewie glanced up at Kylo’s entrance then went back to eyeing the little cat uncertainly. Rey smiled up at him from her armchair, but before she could say anything the little cat swiped a paw at Chewie who backed off a few steps, grumbling a whine and bowing down on his front paws.

“No, Chewie!” Kylo called to the dog. “Not in here!” The others looked at him confused and he shrugged uncomfortably, realising just how weird this was going to sound when they didn’t know who his parents were, didn’t know he had grown up with Chewie. “He does that when he is going to play zoomies.” He said awkwardly, then cringed inside at the use of those words.

Finn’s mouth actually dropped open, Rey and Poe looked almost as surprised. “What are _ Zoomies? _ ” Poe asked as Rey said, “How do you know?” 

They all looked at him expectantly, even Chewie. “It’s when he has his loopy time, he runs around like crazy and jumps on the furniture and knocks stuff over... I’ve seen him doing it in the workshop.”

Thankfully the little cat distracted them from asking more questions when it bounced onto Rey’s lap and lay down with a particularly smug look in its eyes.

Chewie grumbled at it and before Kylo could warn Rey, he attempted to get on her lap as well. Sometimes Chewie forgot just how big he was, and the little cat jumped off the arm of the chair just before it was squashed, making it onto Poe’s lap as Chewie settled half his body on Rey, with a satisfied groan.

By this time Rey and Finn were giggling like children, while Poe looked on in amusement. Kylo needed caffeine for this much noise this early in the day so he headed off to the kitchen to get some.

When he got there he found Hux and Mara already there. Kylo froze in the doorway, every instinct telling him to jump the fucker even with Mara present.

He didn’t have enough control over himself to go back into the lobby, if he moved at all he knew it would be towards Hux, not away. So he stayed put, feeling the blood throb in his head as his heart rate picked up.

Thankfully Mara saw him, and understood what must be the barely contained murderous look in his eyes. “Go into the common area, Hux.  _ Now _ .” She said as she moved between him and Kylo. Hux blanched when he saw Kylo and hurriedly went, spilling his coffee as he did so.

“Kylo.” Mara said carefully. “Why don’t you go to the reading room and sit with Rey and I will bring you some coffee.” It was not a request.

And yet Kylo couldn’t move, “Give me a moment.” He said, his voice strained as he tried to fight the beast inside him.

“Kylo?” A soft hand on his shoulder, it was Rey. “What’s wrong?” _ Shit.  _ Rey was right, they needed to learn to block each other. But in his need to protect her, he found the strength to move away from the kitchen.

He breathed out, “Nothing. Let’s go sit down.” He took her hand and pulled her with him, a look of confusion on her face.

He sat down in the armchair she had vacated and pulled her onto his lap, he felt weak from the amount of willpower he had just expended. Her frown persisted, “What was that about and why don’t you have coffee?”

He sighed again and Mara came in, “Here’s your coffee…  _ He _ is going to breakfast now and will then be somewhere else till lessons. I told him he could have twenty minutes to eat.” Kylo took the mug from her gratefully, nodding his thanks.

Mara gave them all a tight smile and left. Rey fixed Kylo with a determined look and he sighed again. “Hux was in the kitchen getting coffee.” He said quietly, then took a mouthful of his own, wincing as he burned his tongue.

Poe and Finn looked suitable angry and concerned over Rey, but Rey’s expression was, if anything…  _ considering _ . Kylo frowned.

“Are you okay, Peanut?” Finn asked her and she smiled.  _ Smiled? _ Then quickly wiped if off her face as if she hadn’t meant to do it. She shrugged, “I’m fine… What did his face look like?” And this time she grinned openly.

Kylo snorted. “Like shit. Both eyes were black, lots of swelling and bruising under the dressing.” He was amused to feel her do a happy sort of wiggle.

“Peanut, you are so bloodthirsty sometimes.” Finn said, also amused. Rey shrugged again, still grinning, “Hey, if someone paints a picture they like looking at it, right? This is the same, just with Hux’s face.”

Poe choked on his coffee and Finn had to pat him on the back, Kylo took that moment of distraction to whisper in Rey’s ear. “I love you, my little Scavenger.”

She gave him a level look but he could feel a giddy flush of pleasure surge through the bond. It made him think about last night, and he smiled wickedly.

“I think Chewie will be going back to Han after breakfast.” He made his whisper low in her ear, “So, tonight, if you aren’t too tired, I’d very much like to make you orgasm again.  _ And again. And again… _ ” The resulting heat that flooded her face and body made him feel awfully smug.

Her pupils grew large and to his delight she actually squirmed a little on his lap.

“That-” She cleared her throat. “That was mean.” She said. He chuckled. “I know. But  _ so  _ satisfying.”

She thumped him in the shoulder of the arm not holding his coffee, but he just laughed. “Peanut, why are you blushing?” Finn asked curiously, Poe rolled his eyes and thwacked him on the back of his head, though gently. “Hey!” Finn said indignantly, “What was that for?” Poe gave him a level look and his eyes grew round. “ _ Oh _ .” He said uncomfortably, “Right. Okay. Oh…”

The Knights arriving saved them from what would have been an awkward silence, Zainmar threw himself down on a chair yawning hugely, “ _ I’m starving. _ If we are up this early, can we at least go and get breakfast now?”

Kylo met Poe and Finn’s eyes over Rey’s head. “You guys go, we’re going to wait here for a bit.”

Rey turned so she could give him a flat look before turning back to Zainmar, “Hux is over there now so we are waiting for a bit. Mara said he’ll be done in about fifteen minutes but if you guys are hungry go ahead.” 

Zainmar’s mouth twisted with distaste, “On second thought, I’ll stay here. It’s too early in the morning to be looking at his face.”

When it came time to go for breakfast they went in a large group, which was strange. The three girls from Poe’s group surrounded Rey and chatted excitedly to her. 

It was amusing to watch, Rey looked like a lion in amongst gazelles, bemused and unsure how she got there and wondering why they didn’t run from her.

Chewie escorted them to the refectory, then after pushing his head lovingly into Rey’s side, he took himself off in the direction of the workshop.

“Will he be okay on his own?” Rey asked, looking sad that he had gone. Kylo let Poe answer, rather than remind them of his outburst earlier. “Oh, don’t worry about him, you worry about whomever he meets.” Poe laughed as they went in.

Kylo and the Knights immediately scanned the room to check for Hux and nodded to each other when there was no sign of him. Kylo felt himself relaxed slightly as he picked up a tray.

This was the first time he’d eat a meal with Rey he realised, then mentally kicked himself over how stupid that sounded.

As they chose a table and he sat next to her, he frowned at her tray, “Is that all you’re having?” Most of Poe’s friends laughed as if he’d touched on an old joke, and Finn gave him an understanding look, “She never eats much, unless it’s breakfast on Saturdays.”

Rey glared at them both, “I’m sitting right here you know. And it’s plenty.” Kylo looked from her tray to his, then to everyone else's, then back at hers, he opened his mouth to suggest she had more, but a warning look from Poe and Finn shaking his head and drawing his hand over his throat stopped him.

Rey treated him to a glare anyway before starting to eat. Kylo turned to look at Ingalan and he just shrugged and started eating too.

Kylo watched her as she ate, oddly fascinated. She didn’t chew much and ate in a quick, furtive way as if she expected someone to come and take it all away at any given moment.

Once she was done, way before anyone else, she went off to get herself some tea. Kylo leaned over to Finn, “Does she always eat like that?” He asked quietly.

Finn nodded unhappily. “Yeah. I’m hoping she’ll get over it soon. I don’t know how she doesn’t choke or waste away. She is eating more now than she did when she first arrived though.”

Kylo wanted to ask if Finn had been like that too when he’d first arrived here, but didn’t feel like he knew him well enough to ask.

When the bell rang signalling five minutes to start of lessons, Kylo left Rey reluctantly. Strangely, although her shoulders were a little tense, she seemed fine, even through the bond.

Even though she only had Finn going with her. At least Hux wasn’t in her year. He watched as she walked away, Finn’s arm casually flung around her shoulder. There was some nervousness coming through the bond, but mainly he felt  _ determination. _

He shook his head to himself as he went the other way with the others. Even with the bond he had a feeling he was missing something…

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

After the first few lessons, Rey got used to the stares and whispers and let them slide off her like water of a bird’s feathers.

She was aware of Kylo occasionally reaching out to her through their bond, as if he were just checking she was alright. It was sweet, but she needed to work on walling up certain things. His anger was all fiery and without thought. Of course, sometimes hers could be too, but you don’t survive somewhere like Jakku if you can’t shut your mouth and pick your battles. It was always best to keep people guessing, especially your enemies.

As it came near to lunchtime, Rey remembered they had fencing later and felt a flare of excitement at the prospect. After keeping things together all day it would be good to…  _ release  _ some of her pent up energy. 

When she and Finn entered the refectory she came face to face with a startled Hux. She could see his eyes flick behind her as if he were searching for Kylo and Poe. His eyes turned calculating as he realised she and Finn were alone, and there was the barest suggestion of a smirk around his mouth.

Finn bristled, shoulders and chest almost puffing up, “ _ Fuck off, Hux. _ ” He snarled. Rey couldn’t find it in her to feel fear though, all she could see was Hux’s ruined face and she grinned at him as he attempted to loom over she and Finn. “I wonder how much it would hurt being punched in an already broken nose?” She asked Finn casually, who just gaped at her.

Hux flinched visibly and two of his lackeys moved to stand between he and Rey. Rey grinned even more, “I thought so.” She said, somewhat smugly, “Come on, Finn.”

They got out of her way as she pulled Finn along with her to collect trays. “Holy shit, Peanut, you can be so… cold sometimes. Are you okay?”

Rey was still grinning, “Oh, I am awesome.” She told him happily. “Did you see his face? That isn’t going to heal straight.”

Finn barked a startled, disbelieving laugh, “Peanut,  _ I love you _ , but you are  _ crazy _ .” Rey shrugged.

They sat and started to their meal, talking about their English lesson which was next. Rey felt Kylo arriving and turned to smile at him as he came through the door with the Knights.

She gave him a little wave then turned back to Finn while Kylo and the Knights got themselves food.

Finn dimpled as Poe and the rest arrived just after the Knights. “So, how’s it going with you two?” She asked, quietly before the others got there.

Finn smiled sweetly, almost looking shy. “He’s amazing! I can’t believe he likes me.” Rey gave him a playful but gentled punch on his arm, “Don’t say that! You’re wonderful. Of course he likes you, if he didn’t he’d be stupid.”

Finn laughed and pulled her in for a quick hug as Kylo slid into the seat on Rey’s other side. 

“Hi,” She said as she turned to him, very aware of their audience as he kissed her in greeting. It felt so foreign and yet so right at the same time.

“How was your morning? Any problems?” He asked, and she foolishly smirked when she thought of her run in with Hux, “Nothing much.”

“Why are you grinning like that?” Kylo asked and Finn choked on his mouthful of water. Rey elbowed him in the ribs surreptitiously, “Just pleased to see you.” She told Kylo as Finn choked again.

Kylo frowned, “Does he need help?” Rey shook her head, “No, he is just being a drama queen.”

Finn took another drink of water then gave her a disapproving look. “If you don’t tell him, someone else will. Loads of people saw, Peanut.” 

Rey rolled her eyes but conceded the point, Kylo was already looking angry, “It was  _ nothing _ , okay? Hux was leaving as we came in, that’s all.”

Kylo had the audacity to look at Finn, “What else happened? Did he touch her?”

Finn looked nervous, “No, no, he didn’t touch her. She threatened him and he flinched. It was pretty epic actually.”

Kylo still didn’t look happy but Javiell and Leonmar chuckled. Kylo took her hand, “Maybe don’t antagonise him anymore?”

Rey almost gaped at him, “I didn’t. It wasn’t even a proper threat, I just asked him an innocent question, that’s all. Either way, I don’t think he will be getting in my way again.”

She smirked as she felt through the bond Kylo attempting to hide his amusement, even admiration, though there was concern and anger mixed with them.

He pulled her to him for a kiss, and she closed her eyes, < _ I’m fine, honestly> _ She thought at him, and he jumped slightly and looked at her with wide eyes,  _ <I heard that!> _ he answered and she winced, somehow that had come through rather loudly. He looked sheepish, “Sorry.” He said softly and she smiled. “That’s okay, guess we just learned something new. You should eat, your food is getting cold.”

He nodded absently and started eating. She watched him as he ate, he did so mechanically, absently, cutting everything properly whereas she just hacked at things. She wondered if he tasted things or if it was just something he did because he had to.

“Hey, Scavenger.” She looked up at Zainmar who was leaning towards her slightly, “We’re training after school this afternoon, you want to join us?”

Rey smiled, “Sure.” Even better than fencing. 

“Are you sure that’s a good idea, Peanut? Won’t you be tired after our last class? You were really ill last week and you haven’t done much since.”

Rey waved a hand at Finn dismissively. “I’ll be fine.”

Kylo leaned around her to look at Finn, “Why, what’s your last lesson?”

Rey rolled her eyes, “Stop ganging up on me. We have fencing last. So I’ll already be there, it’s perfect… unless of course you are worried about losing,  _ again? _ ”

The Knights chuckled, “I think you may be stuck there, Kylo.” Ingalan said dryly.

Leonmar nodded, “Very neatly done, Scavenger.” Rey smirked as Kylo sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “ _ Fine _ … We can even see if you’re any good at fencing.”

“She’s brilliant.” Finn said staunchly, “And she’s only had one proper lesson.”

Kylo snorted derisively at that, “We’ll see.” He said and went back to his food.

As she waited for the others to finish eating, Rey considered the bond she and Kylo shared. If they could hear each other, feel each other’s presence and know each other’s emotions, then perhaps they could purposefully push things onto each other… She considered trying it now but thought she’d wait till they were sparring. If it worked like she thought it would, that would be a much more entertaining time to test it.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N; Ugh, I know, more filler. God will it never end? I hope so 0_0  
> My sleeping tablets have stopped working so I am currently a zombie which means way more mistakes and fuck ups, so huge thanks to Autonomee betaing and making this readable.  
> Thank you so, so much for all your lovely comments, they are very greatly appreciated <3
> 
> This kind of felt like a milestone, (or at least a nice round number) so I thought I’d run a little competition. I have no idea whether this sort of thing is done, but thought I would give it a try.  
> The prize: I will (attempt) to write a drabble or oneshot for the winner, probably Star Wars based, but I will consider Wheel of Time or Mulan, possibly other things. You give me a prompt as detailed or as vague as you want. It could even be a deleted scene or alternative scene you wanted to see from this story.  
> All you have to do is write me a summary for this fic. Because, let's face it, I am monumentally shit at them.  
> But, it must not mention the force bond connection because I like it being a surprise. I’ll run this till Saturday 7th April, 7pm GMT.  
> I will get your story written by May the 4th. I can email it to you, or post it here, it is up to you.


	51. Never Back Down

 

 _“Shit!”_ Finn said suddenly, “Rey, you’re meant to see the nurse for a check up today. Now, in fact.”

Rey frowned, she had totally forgotten. She had seen the nurse on Saturday night; was she still expected to go after that? She shrugged, “I’m fine. If we forgot, then she probably did too.”

Finn frowned back at her, “I still think you should go, Peanut.” She couldn’t bring herself to tell him why she never wanted to step foot in that room again. The memories of her blood drenched dreams mixed in with Hux’s assault seemed almost more disturbing than what had happened on Saturday night.

She felt a warm hand engulf hers, “I can come with you, we can be in and out in seconds, if need be.” Kylo said quietly. He knew where her mind had been going.

Rey sighed in resignation, “Fine.” She got up and Finn and Kylo did too, then shot each challenging looks. “What? Joselor told _me, I_ had to bring her.” Finn said as Kylo looked at him askance.

Rey rolled her eyes at both of them. “I can go on my own.” She told them and started towards the refectory door.

She’d barely gone six paces though when they caught up to her, she sighed. “I’m not letting you go on your own.” Kylo told her firmly, “Hux could even be there, having his dressing changed or something.”

“He’s right, Peanut.” Finn agreed, then looked surprised that he had sided with Kylo, whereas Kylo just radiated smugness. _Boys._ Rey didn’t deign to reply. It was just Joselor and Leia in the nurses room when they arrived though.

“Ah, Rey. Well done for remembering.” Joselor said as they entered. Rey imagined Finn’s head swelling like a balloon. He would be insufferable for the rest of the day, she was sure.

“You boys can wait outside for a moment.” The nurse told them, shutting the door after them.

“How are you feeling?” Joselor asked as she waved Rey to sit on the bed as the other chair was occupied by Leia.

Rey shrugged, uncomfortable under the sudden scrutiny, “I’m fine.” She said shortly, just wanting to be out of that room.

“You certainly have made a remarkable recovery.” Joselor said. “I was want to check your temperature to be sure though.”

Rey submitted to having the thermometer put in her mouth and her glands felt. Joselor’s hands were cool and oddly dry, like snake skin. She was silent as she examined Rey but Leia spoke into the silence. “Rey, Mara asked me to schedule a session with you. Will Wednesday after school suit you? Say 5pm?”

There wasn’t any way Rey was getting out of this. “That is fine.” She agreed unhappily and Leia smiled at her kindly, as if she knew what Rey was thinking. “I promise I don’t bite. And anything you say to me will not be passed on to anyone else, okay?” Rey merely nodded.

“Rey, you are free to go dear. Your temperature is fine.” Joselor said and she settled herself back in her chair.

“Thank you.” Rey tossed over her shoulder making a beeline for the door and a quick exit.

She strode past Finn and Kylo and they hurried to catch up with her. “All okay?” Finn asked her as Kylo took her hand in his, giving her a comforting squeeze but saying nothing.

“I’m fine.” Rey told Finn. “Just like I said.”

Finn made an unimpressed sort of snort but didn’t respond.

They found the others still in the refectory, as it was so cold outside they stayed there for the whole of lunch, no one feeling much like going outside unless they had to.

By the end of lunchtime, Rey was feeling restless and itchy, she hadn’t been climbing for over a week. She would have loved to go outside and do something but she was still not accustomed to the cold grey weather and was rather relieved when no one else wanted to go out either.

At least she should get out most of her excess energy later, that was something.

“When you spar without a teacher present, do you still stick to the rules?” She asked Kylo just before the end of lunch. He smirked at her, “Why? Don’t you think you’re a match for me unless you cheat?”

“Oooooo!” Zainmar interjected with a grin.

Rey smiled as sweetly as she could, “Oh no. I was just wondering whether you would need an excuse so you don’t feel bad when you _lose._ ”

Zainmar laughed delightedly at that. When Rey looked up at Kylo his eyes had turned dark and his expression made her stomach flip. “ _Oh,_ ” He almost purred, voice low, “You can cheat as much as you want, it will still end with you failing.”

Rey grinned up at him, “In that case. Any weapon of choice, no rules and the victor has to hold down the loser for a good twenty seconds.”

His answering smile was slow and dark and _holy shit_ did she just want to fight him now…

“You two flirt in the weirdest way.” Poe said and Rey looked away from Kylo, cheeks flushing as she remembered they weren’t alone.

Finn was nodding next to him, as were quite a few others. “I don’t know,” Jess said, “I think it just shows they are perfect together.”

“Okay, so anyone taking bets?” Leonmar asked and everyone started talking at once. It looked like they were going to get an audience… _Oh hell._

She was slightly annoyed to find most people were betting against her. Kylo stroked the palm of her hand as he looked at her, “When you say weapon of choice, I am assuming you don’t mean real blades.” He said softly but with a hint of amusement in his voice.

Rey rolled her eyes at him. “Obviously. We’re sparring, not trying to kill each other.”

He surprised her by pulling her in for a kiss. “And what does the winner get?” He asked her when he pulled away.

Rey was annoyed to find herself a little breathless, “Bragging rights.” She said in as unruffled a voice as she could manage.

“Hmmm. We could make it more interesting, unless of course you’re worried you’ll lose?” Kylo’s voice was still low and it was doing funny things to Rey’s equilibrium.

“Of course not. What did you have in mind?” She realised that was probably a stupid thing to ask just after she said it and couldn’t help wincing slightly as he chuckled. Now, whatever he said she would have to agree to or look like she was worried about losing. _Well shit._

And from Kylo’s smug expression he knew it. _ <If I win, you let me suck your toes tonight.> _ Rey blinked in surprise. “What?!” She said out loud then blushed and looked furtively around. Kylo just looked at her, smiling slightly. < _I remember how ticklish you are._ >

< _Fine. It’s not like you’ll win anyway_ . > She thought back. He smirked, eyes dancing mischievously. < _What about you, if you win? Though of course you won’t._ >

The bell rang and Rey was amused to see Kylo look disappointed. “I will have a think and get back to you.” She said out loud as she stood.

He stood up too and kissed her in a way that made her blush even more. If she wanted to win their sparring session she was going to have to block him and his… _effect_ on her or she’d never be able to sink into the cold place she went when she fought.

At least with it coming after fencing she should already be in that mindset. But she was going to have to practice blocking Kylo over the next two lessons. She’d just have to think of what she would ask for after she won. There wasn’t any time now and if she did, she was fairly certain those sort of thoughts would make her even more distracted.

She shivered a little when she thought of him sucking her toes. Then mentally shook herself. This was ridiculous, she was better than this. Stronger. He may be bigger and good at fencing and MMA but she had real experience, she knew lots of tricks. And, she could distract him through their bond… Though that may leave her more open to his influence as well.

She shook herself again. “You okay, Peanut? You look like you’re having an argument all on your own.” Finn said quietly halfway through English.

Rey grimaced, then shot him a quick smile. “Just thinking how best to beat Kylo later.”

Finn grinned, “Just do what you do best. Surprise everyone… Also you need to win because the odds are in his favour and I’ll be raking in the credits if you do.”

Rey chuckled, “Thanks.”

~ ~ ~

Rey and Finn were the last students to arrive to fencing. While everyone was warmed up, Luke came around the room to assign partners.

“Rey, are you feeling up to sparring today?” Luke asked her quietly when he reached her. Rey fought the blush that wanted to creep into her cheeks, and to her surprise, mostly won.

“Absolutely.” She answered, Luke looked slightly surprised but nodded. “How would you feel about trying what we started last week? Two against one?”

Rey grinned, this was what she needed. “Sure.”

Luke called over Ryleaf and Crispaul, who came over reluctantly, looking nervous. “You two spar with Rey.” Luke told them, ignoring their expressions. And he moved off to someone else.

As they waited for the command to fence, Rey said awkwardly, “Again, sorry about last week. I promise I am not going to lose it today.”

They smiled uncertainly then looked at each other, “Did you really break Hux’s nose?” Ryleaf asked in a rush as if he’d been holding it in all day.

Rey shrugged, “Yeah. But he deserved it.” They both made strangled sounds that sounded almost like laughter.

Before they could ask anymore questions, Luke called out, “En Garde!” And Rey was relieved to push her mask down and sink into the correct stance with her body and the cold place in her mind.

She studied the two boys as time slowed. She would need to keep them front and centre, and she would have to always keep one occupied while the other recovered from an attack. If they were able to work together this would be much harder.

“Ready!” Luke called. As her mind became cool and collected she noticed absently that Kylo’s presence became fainter. That was handy.

“Fence!” As soon as Luke spoke the word she attacked, her brain no longer cared which boy was which, at this point it really didn’t matter what their names were, all that mattered was the foil in her hand and the two they each held.

Evidently they had expected her to be more cautious as there were two of them, because she passed one’s foil easily, tapping him on the shoulder then danced away and flicked her wrist to disarm the other. While he went to fetch his sword she parried the other’s attempt to get past her guard, then riposted, scoring a second hit on the shoulder. As she pulled her foil back, he met it awkwardly with his, she flicked her wrist again and his foil went flying too.

“Fast!” Luke’s voice echoed and she lowered her foil, looking around the room as students stood back from each other.

She was surprised to find she was sweating a little as Luke came over to them after telling everyone else to carry on.

“Okay boys, that was completely one sided. You need to focus and work together, cover each other. You were on the back foot there from the start, even though you have the advantage. I am going to watch you, but this time, I will be pausing you during so I can give you pointers okay? Rey is that alright with you?”

Rey shrugged, “Sure.” This may provide useful information for when she sparred with Kylo later as she assumed he would be using a sabre… Though perhaps that was naive… She shook her head, and let her thoughts slide away as she sank back into the coldness.

Although there was a lot less fighting, Luke’s instruction was interesting and Rey listened carefully whenever he paused them, filing away every little tidbit for later.

By the end of the class, Ryleaf and Crispaul had improved, though neither had yet to score a hit on her.

Rey was too focused to feel smug however. As the other students left to change she and Finn held back. As they waited, Rey started stretching and warming up muscles that had gone to sleep a little during the slower pace of the lesson.

Finn bounced excitedly on his feet as he watched, “Are you going to use a staff again, Peanut?”

He asked. Rey chewed her lip as she thought- she had been wondering that herself. The staff was her prefered weapon, and considering their height difference would be a good choice. But, Kylo had seen her use of the staff before, if she chose something else she would surprise him and he would have to learn her style before being able to engage her properly.

She went with her gut, and nodded at Finn, “Yeah. The staff, I’ll go and find one now, could you stay out here in case they arrive and think I’ve changed my mind?”

There was no way she was going to give Kylo any reason to think she’d chickened out of this.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not very happy with this chapter, it took ages to write- the block is still keeping me down. And I keep getting distracted, sorry! 0_0 hopefully it will sort itself out soon.
> 
> Thank you all so much for your lovely comments, you’re amazing and are helping me power through it. <3
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta and she is amazing. <3


	52. Fire Versus Ice

 

Rey carefully considered the staffs in the weapons room, testing them for balance and spring, weight and girth, until she found one that felt almost familiar. As she held it in her hands, she felt the rightness of it and knew she had made the correct decision. 

She was still floating in the cold place when she walked back out to the studio and was surprised to see Kylo had already arrived and was warming up. She hadn’t felt him arrive, though that may be partly due to how seriously she had been choosing her staff.

Still, the distance and clarity the cold place afforded her was good and would prove very useful. Though later she would still need to learn to block him when they weren’t fighting. She was aware, at least to a certain extent, (and that was mainly from people’s reactions), that she came across as cold and distant when she was in the zone. And she was fairly certain being like that all the time was not conducive to keeping up friendships, let alone a relationship.

Kylo stood up from stretching to smile slightly uncertainly at her as make his way towards her, but Finn intercepted him, “Oh no you don’t, not till afterwards. My Peanut’s in the zone. No messing.”

Amusement skittered across Rey’s mind but didn’t settle. Kylo looked irritated and like he would just push past Finn but Ingalan pulled him away, saying, “Kylo, you need to finish warming up.” 

Rey didn’t watch any more but started using her staff to stretch out her muscles further. Most of Poe’s friends had arrived to watch and a few others, but she paid them no mind, exchanging her Foil mask for a Sabre mask.

As she put it on, the coldness descended further. The clarity and calmness were now absolute. This was the deepest she had ever been, a vague part of her wondered why that was so but it was quickly swept away, frozen out.

Ingalan walked to the centre of the room and Rey and Kylo met him, stopping six paces away from each other.

“Okay!” Ingalan said, raising his voice, and everyone hushed, “To reiterate, there are no rules, save the obvious ones. The winner will be whomever pins their opponent for a count of twenty seconds, or until one person calls yield. However, if I shout Fast,  _ you will stop. _ I will only do this if I think one of you is in danger or are hurt too much to carry on. Is that clear?” 

“Perfectly,” Kylo said, his voice low and intense. Rey just nodded.

Ingalan looked at the audience, “You lot, if you want to stay and watch, you will not intervene or make too much noise. If we,” he gestured at the other Knights, “Decide you are causing a distraction,  _ we will remove you _ .”

Someone made an, “OoooOooo” noise and the others laughed. They quickly stopped however as the Knights all scowled at them. The audience settled quickly.

“Right then.” Ingalan said, and stepped back to stand by the wall.  _ “En Garde!” _

Kylo fell into the traditional En Garde position, but Rey merely loosened her joints and gripped her staff, taking a deep breath, the world narrowing down to the person standing in front of her, who was no longer Kylo, just the person she was  _ going to beat.  _ Another deep breath.

“Ready!” Ingalan called as if from a great distance. 

Rey was ice, empty of everything except her objective.  _ Deep breath. _

**_“FENCE!”_ ** came the command to fight, and Rey obeyed…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

During their last lesson, Kylo had felt Rey sink away from his awareness. At first he had almost been frightened, but a few stray feelings had made it through and he had realised Rey had gone to the place she went when she fought.

It was a strange sensation, a numbing sort of cold, making him feel blind and frozen. He shivered and stopped reaching out to her. It was so different to how he fought, he had always pulled on the well of anger within him, allowed the beast a taste of freedom.

He and Rey seemed like fire and ice, so different. And yet, so similar.

As he changed into his blacks with the other Knights, he realised with surprise that he was nervous. It was ridiculous, but then, the last time they had done this, Rey had won. He hadn’t been prepared, but that should hardly matter. And then there was the worry he may somehow hurt her. He shook his head, thinking like this wouldn’t help him win… Again he wondered what she would ask for if she won, then shook his head again, that wouldn't help him either.

Zainmar clapped him on the back, “Get your head on straight, Kylo. You need to focus. Unless you  _ want _ to lose that is.” Kylo shot him a glare and finished changing.

Rey wasn’t in the studio when they arrived, but Finn was there and told them, somewhat self-importantly, that Rey was choosing a staff.

So, it was to be a rematch of their first fight.  _ How poetic.  _ He started warming up but stopped when Rey came out of the weapons cupboard holding a staff.

His heart surged when he saw her, their disconnection felt all wrong, so he made his way over to her just to confirm that everything was okay. He just needed to touch her, even if it was just briefly. But bloody Finn got between them, Kylo was really getting tired of 2187’s possessiveness. If he didn’t know he was gay, he would be very suspicious…  _ unless he was bi? _ Kylo was about to growl and push past when Ingalan pulled him firmly away, getting him to finish warming up. “Focus.” Ingalan muttered at him as he let Kylo go.

When they stood facing each other, it seemed slightly easier as Rey had a mask on, he tried to think of her just as another person he was  _ going to beat. _

As Ingalan shouted,  _ “En Garde!” _ Kylo automatically fell into position, watching as Rey merely shifted, she seemed so  _ nonchalant. _

_ “Ready!”  _ Ingalan called, and Kylo felt the fire rise up inside him, burning away any doubts or worries. Adrenaline surged through him, setting his blood on fire, feeding power into his muscles and sinews.

**_“FENCE!”_ ** And Kylo surged forward, his black clad figure meeting Rey’s white clad one, power crackling in the air between them.

As his sabre met her staff she twisted away before he could lock her in and use his superior strength against her. His momentum pulled her forward as she stepped smartly to the side and swiped at his leg. He twisted himself, catching the blow on his calf muscle instead of his shin and he bought his sabre around to smack her on the arse, grinning as he did so.  _ That’ll piss her off. _

To his disappointment she didn’t seem to even notice, and he found himself having to dance away quickly as she had dropped to the floor and aimed the butt of her staff at his knee. 

Rey quickly sprang up again, as graceful as a dancer.  _ FOCUS! Idiot! _

They exchanged blows, neither landing one, each able to deflect the other with almost preternatural accuracy.

He needed to change tactics, or they may be here all day. The next time she brought her staff close enough he grabbed hold and pulled her towards him.

A small grunt of surprise came from her, but before he could complete a grin she had twisted so that he had to either let go or let his wrist be broken. As he let go, she took advantage of their proximity and pulled him so he over balanced and she fell back, crouching as she did so and somehow sent him tumbling over her head.  _ How the hell had she done that? _

He rolled as he fell and came up ready for her; perhaps it was time to lose his sabre and employ some MMA.

He threw his sabre at her as she came at him, causing her to use her staff to deflect it, he had a vague thought hoping it hadn’t hit anyone as it flew away, but he didn’t dwell on it. As she brought her staff up, he came up under her guard, pulling her down with him to the floor.

They went down in a tangle, she let go of her staff so she could grapple with him properly as they strove for dominance.

Kylo managed to bring his greater weight and strength to bear, pinning Rey down on her back with him holding her hips down between his knees. As he tried to grab her arms she slipped one elbow between his knee and her body and twisted her torso to the side causing his body to shift somewhat. He could feel one of her knees against his back and her other leg swiped out, bending at the knee and, pushing his knee outward, then she moved her other ankle over his extended leg and scooped his leg up and out, pulling her free knee up. She rocked her body to the other side and as his moved, she scrambled out and pulled him back down, getting her legs locked around his torso from behind and braced her arms about his neck in a choke hold.

He knew he only had a few seconds before he would blackout, Rey was slender but wiry and her choke hold was firm. He leant back so he was on top of her, grabbed one of her feet, and pushed his elbow into the back of her knee as he twisted her foot to the side.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey really thought she had him when she’d got behind him and locked her arms around his neck. But she found herself gasping slightly as he twisted her foot, and her grip on him loosened enough for him to get a grasp on the forearm she had around his throat, forcing it away.

There was no point pitching her muscles against his, she briefly considered biting him, but was fairly certain that would be against the ‘obvious’ rules, so she refrained. Instead she let go of him completely, pulling her legs back towards her before using them to push Kylo in the back, propelling him away from her. She rolled to the side and onto her feet, staff in hand again, watching as he sprang to his feet as well.

His sabre wasn’t anywhere near him, so he was weaponless against her. Rey smiled inside her mask. 

He rushed towards her, probably intending to turn his shoulder and bowl her over with his weight, so as she went to meet him she went down on her knees, sliding slightly along the smooth floor and ducking under his legs, staff held out lengthways, catching him in the knees. He pitched forward, tucking his head to roll, then twisted, swiping one of his legs out and around, catching her in the side, just below her arm.

She let the blow move her, but brought her staff around to land a blow on his shoulder before she hit the floor. He dived towards her, gripping her staff in his hands to pull it away from her. She let it go immediately, which he hadn’t expected, and the disproportionate force he was employing made him fall back away from her somewhat.

She sprang towards him, connecting feet first, bowling him over completely, but he grabbed one of her legs, hooking his leg behind her other one, gripping her ankle again and applying pressure. Rey hissed, but willed the pain outside the coldness inside her.  _ It was time to cheat. _

She burrowed a hole in her walls, and moaned in Kylo’s head, imitating the noises he had pulled from her when he had made her orgasm for the first time.

To her satisfaction he started in surprise then froze, and she refilled the chink in her mental armour, slipping her foot from his temporarily slack grip and digging her heel into his armpit, pushing him back and using the thrust to push herself away as he recovered his equilibrium. He growled, low in his throat, and the noise sent a spike of excitement pushing into her gut.  _ Fuck. _ Her walls weren’t back up properly. Instead of trying to rebuild them though, she let them all fall, allowing her connection with Kylo to completely reopen, flooding them both with each other’s presence. Rey had been expecting it, but Kylo was again taken by surprise.

As Rey went to stand, he grabbed her lower legs, forcing his shoulder against her shins, then twisted and pulled her legs forward while holding onto them so she toppled forward, onto him as he leant his torso away so she landed across his lap. He pulled her arm nearest to his body behind her and locked it down, twisting it upwards and flat against her upper back and used his other arm to apply pressure to the small of her back.

_ “Yield.”  _ He growled at her, voice dark and intense. Her body flushed at his tone, partly from anger and partly from excitement. She could hear Ingalan start to count down from twenty. She brought up her free hand, flattened it like a blade with her knuckles bent and punched Kylo in the leg roughly where his lateral femoral area was, she repeated it several times in quick succession before she heard him grunt in pain. His leg jerked, then went limp as pain radiated from the area and she twisted her hips and swung both her legs around his torso, curving her trapped arm loose as his focus on it was interrupted. As she dug an elbow into his short rib, she heard Ingalan stop counting.

Kylo pulled her mask off her head as she tried to squeeze her elbow in further, pressing her knees into his back. She was startled for a moment and then his hands were around her neck, pulling her head to his, he kissed her furiously, roughly, and all sense left her head at the heat of it.

Next thing she knew she was on her back, in a mount hold, with Kylo grinning down at her as he flicked damp hair out of his eyes.

She bucked her hips against his, pushing him forward so he had to brace himself on his arms or fall on her. She then jerked her hips to the side, destabilising him further so she could slide her hips sideways and free, then she brought her knees up and squeezed his waist between them as she simultaneously wrapped his neck in a choke hold, locking her elbow and forearm together, applying as much pressure as she was able to as he struggled to get free.

But she had him now, and she just rose with him when he braced his hands on the floor and lifted up his body.  _ “Yield.” _ She told him as his struggles proved in vain. 

He refused, but his struggles got weaker as the blood flow to his brain slowed with the pressure of her arms.

Any second now, he would pass out, so she readied herself to move to the side so she wouldn’t be crushed.

Then the fire alarm started.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it’s 5am and I am full of beer… Half of this was written while I had been awake for over 24 hours. The other half was after I had managed some sleep, but was mainly just a Zombie. Hope it all makes sense!   
> Thank you so much for your comments, honestly, you guys are way too kind <3
> 
> Songs:  
> ~Blind And Frozen by Beast In Black  
> ~Saturday Night's (Alright for Fighting) by Nickelback (originally by Elton John)  
> ~Make A Move by Icon For Hire  
> ~Back For More by Five Finger Death Punch  
> ~ Pretty Little Psycho By Porcelain Black  
> ~Never Surrender by Like A Storm


	53. In The Heat Of The Moment

For a second, nobody moved, then the Knights ran over and Rey let go of Kylo’s neck, falling to the floor as he gasped in a breath and blinked as the blood returned to his head. The movement of the Knights triggered everyone else to get up and leave the studio to hurry downstairs.

Rey couldn’t care less about the alarm.  _ She had won. _ Even if Kylo hadn’t completely passed out,  _ she had won.  _ She grinned up at him as she watched him regain his composure.  

“Come on you two, we have to go. There wasn’t a warning there’d be a drill today, there may be a fire in this building!” Ingalan said urgently as he and Javiell hauled Kylo to his feet.

Zainmar went to give Rey a hand up too but she slithered away slightly and stood on her own; she could feel the adrenaline still surging through her and she wasn’t ready to be touched just yet, she was too wired.

They were almost at the door that led to the stairs when she froze mid-stride, something was wrong. There was…  _ something. _ It was a queasy wrongness, that spoke of danger, of enemies lurking in the dark. 

“What is wrong with you two? We have to move!” Ingalan said as he and the Knights turned back to look at her, and she realised Kylo had also stopped.

Rey ran back to pick up the staff she had been sparring with and threw Kylo his sword without thinking.

He snagged it out of the air as if they had been practicing the move for years, and they both left the room together.

“Why have you got weapons?” Leonmar asked in a confused voice as they ran down the stairs. Before Rey could work out how to explain, Kylo answered as they made their way out of the gym, “There may be something bad out there. Look, I’ll explain later, but just be ready for anything, okay?”

Finn and everyone else had been waiting for them outside and they all started towards the west field which was where the registers were taken in an emergency.

There was a sudden loud report, and a gout of black smoke poured into the sky from the direction of the library.

Without making a conscious decision, Rey was running, streaking past the basketball and tennis courts and the main school building till she could see the library clearly.

And that was where the wrongness was emanating from, she swept her senses wider, pushed with the other sense she and Kylo seemed to now have.

_ There. _ There was someone inside, she thought she could hear sirens in the distance but they may not arrive in time, the fire was already huge, a crackling burning monster consuming everything with surprising speed. 

Rey could hear people yelling at her as they ran after her, but she didn’t pause.

Whoever was trapped was up high, and Rey knew how to get to them. She threw her staff aside and zipped up the drainpipe she had used to get to the roof last week. The higher she got the more smoke got in her eyes and lungs but she had no loose cloth to tie over her mouth; she would have to be quick. The heat of the fire was palpable, like a hot desert wind, licking at her exposed skin and drying her eyes.

When she got to the roof she found the skylight she remembered from her previous visit and broke it with her still gloved hand, jumping back as the hot air inside burst out. At least the fire wasn’t up this high yet.

She jumped down and landed lightly, coughing in the smoke that was filling the corridor. Rey dropped down to a crawl, staying low on the floor and moving towards the presence she could sense.  _ <REY! GET OUT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? THEY WON’T LET ME FOLLOW YOU, GET OUT NOW FOR THE LOVE OF THE LIGHT, I CAN’T LOSE YOU AGAIN!  _ **_GET. OUT. NOW!” >_ **

Rey winced as Kylo’s anguished, terrified voice filled her head. _ <I’ll be out in a minute, someone is in here and I can’t leave them.> _ She told him calmly, then slipped into her cold place. She needed to think clearly and concentrate and Kylo’s panic was clouding her thought processes.

There! Rey kicked open a door into an internal room to find two smaller students huddled in a corner, wide eyed and coughing.

She swept her senses out again but they seemed to be the only ones there. She could feel the intense heat through the thin soles of her fencing shoes. “Come with me if you want to live.” she yelled at them. They just stared at her in dumb shock, so she grabbed an arm of each of them and pulled them to their feet.

“Give me your shirt,” She told the boy, when he didn’t move fast enough she got hold of it and just ripped it off him, “Put on your blazer,” She told him and handed them each a piece of the ripped shirt, keeping one for herself. “And keep these over your nose and mouth. Now,  _ come on _ , we don’t have much time!”

They must be year sevens, they were small and seemed too bewildered to be afraid.  _ Little fools. Where was their survival instinct? _

Rey got them to crawl ahead of her, wondering frantically how to get them out, she’d be able to get them up on the roof but not herself, and if they went up on their own would they follow her instructions on how to get down or would they just stay up there and burn?

There was a crash from behind them and that decided for her, “You two. You are going up on the roof, when you get up there, run to the north side, the side you can see the gym from. On the far corner there is a drain pipe, people will be waiting to help you down. You will have to run, do not wait for me, okay?” They nodded at her, tears streaked both of their faces now, Rey sighed, then coughed as she did so. “Okay,” She said to the boy, “I’m going to send you up first, then you help your friend, okay? You hold on to her hand all the way, you hear me?” He nodded and she picked him up by his knees, and stood, trying not to inhale deeply as she thrust him at the skylight. He caught hold and she shoved him upwards, ignoring his gasp as he cut his hands on some broken glass; that would be the least of his worries if they stayed here much longer. At least the girl was lighter, and the boy helped pull her up. She slithered over the edge and the boy’s face peered back down at Rey. “ _ Go! _ Run!  _ Now you idiot!” _ Rey shouted at him angrily and he disappeared. She breathed a small sigh of relief then dropped back down onto the floor, she slipped out of the cold place briefly to let Kylo know what was happening,  _ <Kylo, two kids making their way to the drain pipe I climbed up, help them down, now! I’ll be along in a second.> _

She could find a chair to stand on to reach the skylight but she would have to work quickly. Yet every room she entered was chairless, or was too hot to open the door safely. It was mostly storage rooms up here. The floor began to feel unstable and the heat was becoming too intense. She would have to jump out of a window.  _ <REY!> _ Kylo had somehow pushed through to her, just her name though. She slipped out of the coldness once again as she searched for a big enough window.  _ <Did you get them?> _ she asked him.  _ <Yes. We got them. But where are you? Why aren’t you with them?> _ Rey sighed and punched through the window she had found, then cleared away as much glass as she could.  _ <I’m coming down now, just another way, okay? See you in a second.> _ She closed their connection again, this time completely. There was no room for distraction if she wanted to get this right; there wasn’t enough room to take a run up, she would have to leap as far as she could, and the ground didn’t look too inviting either, but it would have to do.

Behind her a floor collapsed and a wall of heat hit her, Rey ducked down against the wall as the heat rushed out of the glassless window. It was hotter than hell fire and the smoke grew thicker. When the rush had stopped she balanced for a moment on the ledge of the window, picked the spot she wanted, and jumped.

She tucked her legs in to her chest, leaning forward slightly, then extended her legs again to help absorb the impact when she landed. She landed on her forefeet with her knees slightly bent, then collapsed her legs and went into a roll, tucking her shoulder and head so she rolled on to one side.

She was still close by the library but the fall and impact had winded her and she was feeling rather dizzy, she tried to get up to move away but she fell down again, coughing like her lungs were trying to come out of her throat. It made her even more dizzy.

Rey dropped her walls, she managed to get out,  _ <I’m out, but I am struggling to breath, could you assist?> _ Then she lay down, the heat on her skin made her think of Jakku and her mind wandered off absently. 

There were sirens close by now,  _ stars _ , but they were bloody noisy things, did people not understand she was trying to sleep?

_ <Rey?> _ Her eyes fluttered, there was an odd tugging sensation inside her mind. _ <REY!> _ She winced, did he have to be so bloody loud? She tugged on her end of whatever was being tugged. 

“Rey!” She blinked, _ that wasn’t in her head. _ “Peanut!” Followed close behind it. But Rey just lay there, her head was feeling so light now, so dizzy and floaty.

“Sweet fucking stars, Rey!” Someone said as they fell to the floor beside her. Then something licked her face and she spluttered indignantly.

“Chewie, leave her alone. Kylo, pick her up, we don’t have time for a bloody reunion, we have to go!”

Then Rey was really floating, had she somehow learnt to fly? If she had, why was everything going black?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo couldn’t quite believe it when Rey suddenly sprinted off away from the field they were meant to be going to. What was she doing? Then his brain pointed out she was running towards the fire,  _ into danger, _ and he started after her.

But he was tired, he couldn’t understand why she wasn’t, she had had fencing, then their sparring bout, which she had almost won. And yet she was getting away,  _ what was she doing? _ There was a feeling of wrongness emanating from somewhere to the left of the library, but that was not where she was heading,  _ oh bloody and bloody ashes, _ she was heading straight for the nearest drain pipe on the wall of the library.

“Rey! REY! What are you doing?” He yelled at her, but she didn't seem to hear him. She threw her staff down and climbed the pipe so quickly she was over the top before he’d even put a hand on it.

Strong arms pulled him away as he went to put his foot on the first rung to follow her. He turned to snarl and found Ingalan, holding him back, pale faced along with the other Knights and Finn coming up behind them.

“Kylo,  _ you can’t.  _ She weighs half of what you do and we don’t know how strong the roof is, or what the hell she is even doing!”

“I can’t leave her!” Kylo almost shouted at them. They looked at him, faces unhappy yet firm. “I’m sorry, but we are not letting you up there, Kylo.” Ingalan said again.

Kylo growled low in his throat, but Zainmar spoke before he could do or say anything rash, “Use your, your bond thing. Like, can you feel what she thinks she is doing?”

Kylo closed his eyes for a second, he was  _ so stupid _ sometimes. “Fine.” He grated out at them, then closed his eyes again so he could concentrate, as Finn had caught up with them and was loudly trying to find what was going on.

_ <REY! GET OUT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? THEY WON’T LET ME FOLLOW YOU, GET OUT NOW FOR THE LOVE OF THE LIGHT, I CAN’T LOSE YOU AGAIN!  _ **_GET. OUT. NOW!” >_ **

Kylo felt her reaction to his shout, then she responded calmly, as if she was not on top of a fucking burning building,  _ <I’ll be out in a minute, someone is in here and I can’t leave them.> _

And then she disappeared behind a wall of ice. He was going to kill her when he next saw her.  _ Kill her. _ Or just tie her to her bed and never let her leave her room again... Ridiculously his cock twinged at the thought. This was so not the time.

He opened his eyes, “Apparently there is someone in there, she is trying to get them out.” He said heavily and everyone looked at him like he had just spouted Shyriiwook.

“How the hell do you know that?” Finn asked as Poe said, “But how could she have known that?”

They looked at eachother then back at him, eyes suspicious, though of what, he had no idea.

Kylo exchanged an uneasy look with the Knights, “That doesn't matter right now, just trust me, okay?” He said to Finn and Poe, then looked at the Knights again, “Split up, scout the sides to see if there are any other ways in and how bad the fire is, then meet back here. I’ll stay here in case she comes down.”

Ingalan shook his head, “Javiell and Poe can do one side, Finn and Zainmar the other. If you think I am leaving you here Kylo, you are wrong.” 

Kylo ground his teeth. “Fine.” He agreed. “But maybe Leonmar should go back to the field and let Luke or Han know what is happening.”

Everyone left at a quick trott, the sirens in the distance were getting nearer… and the wrongness was still to the left, around at the front of the school. But he didn’t give a shit about that now. 

The seconds seemed to ooze by like treacle. It was intolerable. But he was distracted by the arrival of Chewie, who was a moment ahead of Luke and Han.

And they both looked very angry. Chewie shoved his head into Kylo’s hand and whined. “What the hell do you lot think you are doing? Go to the field now!” Han almost shouted at them. Ingalan winced but Kylo met Han, glare for glare as Luke said, “Leonmar told us a rather gabbled story, but seemed to indicate that Rey is somewhere inside the library?” Luke’s voice was calm but there was a definite undercurrent of anger in it.

Before he or Ingalan could respond, Javiell, Poe, Finn and Zainmar arrived back, before either teacher could say anything, Javiell spoke quickly, “Nowhere to go, the front is too hot to even get near and the rest of it doesn’t look good…”

Kylo closed his eyes, _ shit, shit, shit.  _ He swayed as Ingalan filled the teachers in. Then he felt Rey’s presence again, he almost fell over but Chewie braced him.  _ <Kylo, two kids making their way to the drain pipe I climbed up, help them down, now! I’ll be along in a second.> _

Kylo opened his eyes and raised his voice over the others, “Rey’s found two kids, they are on the roof making their way to this drain pipe.” Everyone but the Knights stared at him incredulously. “How could you possibly know that, Kylo?” Luke asked reasonably, as if he were talking to someone who was mentally challenged.

Kylo ignored him, “Who is the lightest here? We may need to send someone up to help them.”

“No one is going up.” Han said as the Knights looked at each other. Javiell sidled over to the drain pipe and Kylo and the other Knights stood in front of him as he started to climb. Poe would have been smaller but Javiell was stronger and probably quicker.

Han and Luke were just angrily walking forwards to push the Knights aside when Chewie growled at them and they paused. Han’s eyebrows raised, then he looked at Luke who raised his eyebrows back. Han sighed, “I’ll go and get a tarp, the kids can jump down onto it if we all hold it.” 

But Kylo shook his head,  _ “There isn’t time.” _ There was a shout as Javiell, who had continued climbing, reached the top. He disappeared then came back over with a girl clinging on to his back.

“Zainmar, get up there and take her off Jav so he can get the other one.” Kylo said before either of the teachers could comment.

Zainmar didn’t wait to find out if that was allowed and just started up. “But where is Rey?” Finn asked worriedly.

Kylo’s gut clenched, if she had been there, Javiell wouldn’t need help getting the kids down.  _ Shit. _ He shut his eyes,  _ <REY!> _ he roared at the cold void that was her vague presence. He sighed in relief as she flickered back into reach,  _ <Did you get them?> _ He clenched his fists,  _ <Yes. We got them. But where are you? Why aren’t you with them?> _ At least she felt fairly calm, determined rather than frightened… But then again, she’d jumped off the gym and thought that was fine, so her current feelings probably couldn’t be trusted.  _ <I’m coming down now, just another way, okay? See you in a second.> _ And she again disappeared into that cold, unreadable void.

He opened his eyes to see Zainmar and the girl had made it down and Javiell was almost down too. Ingalan was reaching up to aid him when there was a huge noise and the whole building seemed to shake. Javiell fell off the drainpipe, the boy falling with him. Thankfully Han and Ingalan managed to slow their fall, all of them ending up in a heap on the ground.

Luke rushed to the boy, whose hands were bleeding but didn’t look like he was otherwise badly injured.

Kylo shook his head as he helped Ingalan to stand, then froze as he realised Rey may still be inside, he swallowed, panic squeezing his chest as Luke and Poe led the two kids away from the library.

“But where is Rey?” Finn asked as he wrung his hands in distress, “What if she was still inside when, when…” 

Kylo shut his eyes and pushed his senses out, trying desperately to locate where the cold void was.

Just as he did so, he felt her drop her walls,  _ <I’m out, but I am struggling to breath, could you assist?> _ He gasped in relief, it was short lived however, she was fading in and out and hadn’t told him where she was. He pushed his senses out again, questing for her presence. <Rey?> He called to her as he tugged on their connection, then when she didn’t respond, he shouted at her in desperation _ <REY!> _ There! She tugged back and he started running, Chewie bounding along with him, Finn close behind them.

Somehow she was in a heap on the ground, her whites and face filthy and soot covered. “Rey!” He almost shouted as he saw her, then grimaced as Finn did shout,  “Peanut!”

She didn’t respond and he dropped to his knees when he reached her, from her position it 

looked like she had jumped out of the library. “Sweet fucking stars, Rey!” He was going to kill her. He really, really was. He put his hand on her shoulder to shake her and Chewie licked her left cheek and eye and to Kylo’s relief she reacted, eyes fluttering as she grimaced and weakly raised an arm to try and bat Chewie away.

“Chewie, leave her alone!” Han ordered the dog, who gave him a unimpressed look, “Kylo, pick her up, we don’t have time for a bloody reunion, we have to go!”

Kylo scooped up Rey, this was really becoming a habit, and he, Han, the Knights and Chewie moved away as quickly as they could.

Kylo felt her properly pass out a few seconds after picking her up, her mind went blank and her head lolled back completely. 

They had barely gone twenty paces when another loud concussion and wall of heat threw them all off their feet.

Kylo crouched his body as he fell so Rey wasn’t crushed by him and was protected from any flying debris. At least fencing apparel was constructed to prevent penetration of sharp objects and to absorb the impact of hits of the swords and the like. It offered he, Rey, Finn and the Knights some measure of protection.

Han had been in his work clothes as well which was a heavy leather vest over his shirt and  flame retardant trousers.

But Chewie had no such protection.   
  


  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so, so, sorry, the block is still being a bitch and everything's happening so much slower than previously 0_0  
> But the next chapter up tomorrow, I promise! <3
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta ^_^


	54. Sirens For A Welcome

 

As Javiell and Zainmar helped Kylo to his feet with Rey, there was an anguished cry from Han as he stumbled over to where Chewie was sprawled on the ground.

Kylo almost dropped Rey when he saw. Chewie was clearly badly injured, a jagged piece of glass was embedded in his side, the fur on his left side was scorched and his breathing was laboured and sounded wet.

Kylo felt an enormous lump in his throat and tears started to burn in his eyes as he watched Han fall to his knees, hands fluttering over the dog as he tried to work out how he could help the animal without hurting him further.

Chewie raised his head slightly and gave a pitiful whine as blood oozed from the wound made by the glass and a few other smaller ones.  _ He’s going to die. _

Kylo shook his head,  _ no,  _ he was  _ not _ going to let that happen. “Ingalan, take Rey.” He said, shoving her still form at the other boy.

Ingalan looked bewildered but took her automatically and Kylo stumbled over to Han and Chewie, and lay his hands on the dog as gently as he could.

He closed his eyes and felt inside for whatever the fucking force thing that he and Rey had, so he could heal Chewie.

But there was nothing there, not even one spark. He opened his eyes and frantically looked up at the Knights who were now standing next to Chewie, Finn stood further back, but Kylo ignored him. “It isn’t working!” He told the Knights, his voice cracking in frustration and despair.

Han was too woebegone to register their conversation and was just sitting beside his longtime companion and best friend, stroking his face as he slipped away.

“Maybe you need her for it to work?” Leonmar said, gesturing at Rey. 

“Yes! Put her down where I can touch her.” Kylo said urgently. 

“Hey, what’s going on? We need to get Rey to see a medic!” Finn said, voice bewildered. Zainmar clapped him on the arm, speaking quietly to him. Kylo ignored them.

Ingalan carefully put Rey down and Kylo reached for her, touching the skin of her cheek. There! He could feel a faint crackle of power, but it wasn’t enough. 

He shook her gently to try and wake her, then harder. She coughed as she woke, raising confused eyes to look around her. “What’s going on?” She rasped at him.

“Rey, we need to heal Chewie, he’s dying and I can’t do it on my own.” He said desperately.

Her eyes widened in horror, “Help me sit.” She told him and he unceremoniously pulled her to a sitting position by the front of her whites.

She grimaced at him and coughed again, then her eyes fell on Chewie and they went wide. She took one of Kylo’s hands and placing her other on the dog, and they both closed their eyes.

And _ there _ , there was their power, it coalesced behind his eyelids, and together he and Rey pushed it into Chewie, directing it where it needed to go. 

“Ingalan, pull the glass out. Now.” Kylo said with his eyes still shut as he concentrated.  _ <Good thinking> _ Rey said as they worked. Healing him with the glass still embedded would have been a bad idea.

By the time they were done, they were exhausted and as soon as they opened their eyes, Rey fell back on the ground, out cold. 

A whine from Chewie drew Kylo’s attention away from her and to his relief he saw that it had worked.  _ They had been in time.  _

Han gathered as much of the dog as he could into his arms and rocked him gently, muttering soft curses at him as he did.

Kylo raised his eyes to see the Finn and the Knights staring down at him, they almost looked awed, perhaps afraid.

Kylo swayed where he sat and the moment was lost, the Knights moved to help him up and Leonmar scooped up Rey.

“Han, we should go.” Ingalan said gently as he placed a hand on the man’s shoulder.

Chewie made an agreeing groan-whine and Han let him stand up. The dog’s legs were slightly wobbly, and his fur was still singed and blood spattered, but  _ he was okay. _

Han stood heavily, looking between them all, “What just happened?” He asked, voice still rough but tinged with suspicion and confusion. Finn nodded in agreement.

There was a loud noise and a wave of heat hit them, “I think we should get out of here first.” Ingalan answered and they all started moving as quickly as they could away from the inferno.

They were soon met by ambulance crew led by Luke and Leia. 

One of the medics took Rey from Leonmar and once they had moved enough away from the library they laid her on the ground and started working on her, giving her oxygen and trying to wake her up.

Kylo sat down heavily near them but waved away a medic who wanted to check him over. “I’m fine.” He told them irritably. 

One of the medic’s trying to wake Rey looked at him, “Can you tell us what happened?”

Kylo sighed, “She jumped out a window of one of the top floors.”

The man looked at him doubtfully. “But she doesn't seem to have any breaks.”

Kylo grimaced, “It wasn’t her first time… I think she mainly just breathed in a lot of smoke and she’s really tired.”

The man’s eyebrows raised, “She doesn't look like a typical parkour nut.”

Kylo just shrugged, his weariness was bone deep and his adrenaline had completely run out.

Rey came around abruptly and tried to rip the oxygen mask off her face and push the medics away as she snarled.

“Rey!” Luke barked as he dropped to his knees beside her and pushed her shoulders down. 

Kylo was too tired to talk out loud, _ <Rey, I’m right beside you, they are just giving you oxygen. I’m here and Chewie’s okay.> _

“Calm down, you’re okay.” Leia said as she joined them on the floor. Rey fell back with a sigh.

“I’m fine. Just let me up.” She told them irritably. 

The medic made an unimpressed noise. “You can get up when I say you can, young lady.” He said firmly.

If Kylo had had the energy he would have laughed at Rey’s outraged expression. Chewie chose that moment to sit on Kylo’s lap so he could get his nose to Rey’s hand, and she turned her head to smile at him.

The medic made another irritated noise, “Get that dog out of here, and the rest of you, unless you are a relative or a teacher you can go and get checked out by my colleagues.”

Han pulled Chewie away by his collar and Luke heaved Kylo up and away, helped by Leia.

“She will be fine. And you need those cuts treating... You also need to explain to me what in the light just happened.” Leia said as he was led to sit down some way away from Rey.

Luke moved off to check on the others, leaving Kylo alone with his mother, it was not a situation Kylo was pleased about, but he pushed that thought away for now, to concentrate on more important things. Such as cuts. Cuts? He hadn’t felt anything, he put a hand to the back of his head and grimaced as it probed a sore spot. Leia smacked his hand away and gave him a level look.

What the hell was he meant to say? He flicked his eyes around desperately to try and make eye contact with any of the Knights but they were all being examined.

So he decided to play the noncommittal teenage boy card. He shrugged, “Rey helped get some kids out of the library, but she had to jump from a window to get out. She was passed out when we found where she landed, then as we moved away from the library there was a blast that knocked us all off our feet.”

His mother looked at him, frowning in displeasure. “Clearly, there was more to it than that, Ben.”

Kylo grimaced and looked around to make sure no one had heard, then glared at her.

A medic arrived then and started treating his cuts with alcohol then bacta. “Are the two kids okay?” Kylo asked Leia, trying to distract her.

She gave him a look that informed him that she had not forgotten, but merely said, “Yes, they are being treated for mild burns, smoke inhalation and cuts to their hands but are otherwise fine… If not for you, Rey and the others, they would almost certainly be dead.”

Kylo nodded, relieved at the respite form questioning. “Why were they even up there?”

Leia made an exasperated noise, “I don’t know. It seems they thought the fire wouldn’t reach them if they went higher. We will have to hold an assembly soon to remind everyone of what to do in such a situation.” She sighed and rubbed her forehead. “Did you see anyone around there? The fire spread too quickly for it to be an accident.”

Kylo remembered the feeling of wrongness, “I thought I saw someone going around the front of the main building as we arrived at the library, but I can’t be sure, and I didn’t go and see because we were trying to help Rey.”

It worked like a charm. Leia’s head came up, “Indeed.” She stood, “I will speak with you later.” She told him grimly, then swept away. If she ran into the culprit, Kylo almost felt sorry for them.

“Did you bang your head at all?” The medic asked him and he shook his head.

“No, I’m fine, honestly. Just a bit bruised and tired.” The women tutted at him as she moved behind him and gently cleaned the wound on his head.

All Kylo wanted was a shower, some food and to go to sleep. Preferably with Rey, but he didn’t think either of them was in a condition to climb over the roof right now. 

As the medic left him, Han came over, thrust a can of drink into Kylo’s hand, then dropped to the floor next to him, followed by Chewie.

“Drink. You need sugar and caffeine.” Han said quietly.

Kylo did as he was told, quickly emptying the can. Han looked at him closely, then turned to stare off to one side.

“You and the girl. I don’t know how, but you saved Chewie.” It was a statement, so Kylo kept quiet as he ruffled Chewie’s ears affectionately. 

“You two clearly have some kind of... Connection, you were communicating with her while she was inside the library weren’t you?”

Kylo shifted uncomfortably, and Han looked at him. “Keep it to yourselves.  _ Tell no one _ .” 

Of all the things he had expected his father to say, that had not been one of them, Han didn’t seem to notice his look of shock. “You could probably tell your mother and Luke. But no one else, okay? This… this happened to your grandfather too.” 

Kylo’s jaw dropped and he felt like his eyes may fall out of his head.

“Shut your mouth, idiot, or you’ll catch flies.” Han said with the ghost of a smile.

Kylo shut his jaw with a click. “Rey healed your face didn’t she?” Han asked before Kylo could get any words out.

Kylo shifted, “Yes.” He said quietly. 

Han nodded, “So, we need to come up with a plausible story as to what just happened.”

Kylo shook his head, “That’s what I’ve been trying to do for the last ten minutes.”

Han sighed, “I take it your friends know? None of your guys seemed surprised by any of it.”

Kylo nodded. “Yeah, but Poe and Finn don’t know.”

Han rubbed his chin, then waved Luke over to them, “Grab the other boys would you?” He asked and gave Luke some kind of sign that made Luke’s eyebrows raise in surprise, but he went off and collected the others.

“What was that?” Kylo asked with interest, but Han ignored him.

Rey arrived last, supported by Luke, she gave Kylo a brief smile before sitting by him, though it was more like a controlled fall.

The comforting feeling of her head resting on his shoulder was immense, and he laced their hands together as they sat.

“What is this about?” Finn asked as he moved to sit on Rey’s other side, taking her other hand in his. Kylo was almost too tired to be irritated by the action.  _ Almost. _

Everyone looked at everyone else, some in confusion, others in frantic attempts to communicate with their eyes.

Han cleared his throat, gaining everyone’s attention, “We need to discuss… exactly what happened.” He said awkwardly.

Poe frowned as Han paused, “But you were there for most of it.”

Han gave him a flat look, looking not unlike Leia for a moment. “Thank you, Poe. What I meant to say is.. If anyone asks, the kids were yelling from a top window and Rey heard them. It was a reckless thing to do,” Han paused to give Rey a steady look, before carrying on. “But brave, and you saved those kids’ lives.”

Kylo felt Rey blush next to him but didn’t comment as he watched the others take in Han’s words.

Predictably, it was Finn who was the problem. “But the kids weren’t yelling, and how would she have heard them from all the way by the gym? And how did Kylo know what she was doing when he couldn’t even see her?”

Kylo felt Rey shift her head away from his shoulder. “Finn... wait,” She looked at the Knights, then at Kylo, “Kylo,  _ do they know?” _

“Know what?!” Finn asked, voice getting higher in indignation.

_ <The Knights know> _ Kylo answered and winced slightly at her reply.  _ <You nerf riding grave robber! You-> _

Luckily Finn cut her short by pulling her round so she would face him, “Know what, Peanut?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey sighed and rubbed her head, it ached like someone had cracked open her skull with a hammer.

“Finn. Okay, well… This is going to sound really fucking crazy, but Kylo and I can talk to each other… with our minds.”

Finn merely looked worried and turned to Han, “I think she needs to see the medic again, maybe she’s got concussion or something.”

Kylo made an irritated noise beside her, “It’s true, Finn. That’s how I knew where she was and that she was sending the kids down.”

Finn opened his mouth to reply with what was obviously going to be another suggestion about seeing a medic, but Rey didn’t give him a chance. “I’m fine. Seriously. Okay, humour me, hold up a number of fingers so Kylo can’t see how many they are, I will tell him and then you will see we’re not crazy.”

Finn’s mouth thinned but he nodded, “Okay, but when this doesn’t work, please will you see a medic?”

“Fine. Kylo turn away.” She answered quickly, the sooner this was done, the sooner she could lie down somewhere dark and quiet. Kylo made a grumbling noise but complied.

Finn gave her four fingers and Poe leaned around him to hold up three. Rey shut her eyes,  _ <Finn has four, Poe has three. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me the Knights know!> _

She felt Kylo shrug slightly and turn back around. “Finn was four and Poe was three.” He said matter of factly.

Rey watched in satisfaction as Poe and Finn’s eyes nearly fell out of their heads, but it was Luke who spoke, “ _ No one  _ must know of this.” He said gravely and everyone turned to look at him. “You must all swear to tell no one… This could be dangerous knowledge.”

Luke looked at each of them steadily, eyes serious. Rey wasn’t sure why, but his look made her uneasy, though she completely agreed with not telling anyone. But that was just her secretive nature. This seemed to imply… something, she couldn't quite grasp. And he so easily believed them… As had Han. Had they encountered something of this sort before? 

There was a pause as everyone presumably thought upon the same lines as she, then Poe said, “Even if Rey and Kylo are telepathic, that still doesn’t explain how Rey knew the kids were in the building.”

Everyone was suddenly looking at Rey again. She shifted, uncomfortably. “I just knew they were there, okay? I don’t know how, I just did.”

Ingalan frowned, “Was that when you both froze right before we left the gym?”

Rey nodded but to her surprise, Kylo shook his head. “No, I felt something else…” He turned to look at her, “It was the same feeling as on Saturday, do you remember? And it was coming from in front of the school,  _ not the library. _ ”

Rey frowned at him as she thought back, that first feeling that had stopped her had been the same as Saturday. It was afterwards that she had sensed the children in the library, when she’d got closer... Her head suddenly hurt ten times more and she swayed where she sat, healing Chewie on top of everything else had really drained her.

Arms suddenly encircled her and she looked up in confusion as Ingalan picked her up. “What?” Her words sounded slurred,  _ Stars! _ She didn’t think she’d ever been this tired, ever.

Kylo’s face swam into view, he looked as tired as she felt. “You need to sleep, medics have cleared us to go.”

“I can walk to the dorm on my own bloody legs.” She grumbled back, gaining a snort from both Kylo and Ingalan.

She was about to irritably point out she was  _ not _ a child when blackness came up and swallowed her whole.

**~**   
  


**“The consequences of our actions are always so complicated, so diverse, that predicting the future is a very difficult business indeed.”** ****  
**  
** **―Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban**

  **~**

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from The Wild Boys by Duran Duran  
> Autonomee is my Beta <3 
> 
> I am so, so, sorry, the block is still being a bitch and everything's happening so much slower than previously 0_0


	55. By The Pricking Of My Thumbs...

 

Kylo managed to make it up to his room before he allowed himself to collapse. He fell on his bed fully clothed and passed out.

When he next woke, it was to lamp light. He groaned then coughed, sitting up quickly to make it easier on his chest, but that just made his head swim.

Ingalan handed him a large class of water and he drank it greedily, leaning back against the wall his bed was next to.

“How are you feeling?” Zainmar asked and Kylo realised they were all there. He looked at the clock to see it was 10.30pm, his stomach growled as he realised he’d missed dinner.

“Like shit.” He said truthfully, then as his mind caught up with his body he asked, “Wait, what happened to Rey? Is she okay?”

“Calm down,” Ingalan said as Leonmar put a tray of food on the bed beside Kylo. “I took her up to her room, she was just exhausted, like you. I think Jess is staying in her room tonight, so she won’t be on her own. So, eat something.”

Kylo fell to, demolishing everything on the tray quickly, then downing another pint of water as the others talked about the fire and its possible causes.

“The entire building was gutted.” Javiell was saying as he finished his food. “Nothing left but a skeleton. It’s not confirmed but it obviously had to have been foul play. Though why anyone would want to burn down the library instead of the actual school, I have no idea.”

They all looked at him and he shrugged, “What? We don’t have lessons in the library, we do in the school.”

Zainmar snorted, “He has a point.”

Kylo rubbed his face and realised he was still filthy. “I’m going to take a shower,” he said and hurried to the bathroom, hoping the water hadn’t been turned off for the night yet.

It hadn’t, and as he stood under the water, wincing as it stung his cuts, his brain started processing things… and he did not like what it concluded.

Once the water going down the drain was no longer black, he got out and dried himself, then went back to his room.

“It was a diversion.” He said with conviction as he entered and went to the wardrobe to pull out clean clothes.

“What was?” Zainmar asked, as they all turned around so Kylo could get dressed.

“ _ The fire. _ ” Kylo said as he pulled on jeans and a t-shirt. “It diverted attention away from something else. I don’t know what. But that feeling Rey and I had? That was the same as Saturday. It was so powerful we both grabbed weapons. I think it’s only coincidence that Rey became aware of the trapped kids. When I got there, I could still feel something to the front of the school, but I didn’t investigate cos we had bigger problems.”

“Wait, you’re saying at first, Rey was running _ towards _ the danger? Seriously Kylo, she is mental.” Zainmar said. Kylo had to admit he had a point, but it wasn’t important right now.

“Maybe. But we need to find out what else happened.”

He sat back down on the bed, squeezing as much water out of his hair as he could with his towel.

“Well, the front of the school has the reception, most of the offices, and the nurse's room…” Ingalan said.

“It will be hard to work out what they were after if we don’t know who it was and what their motives were.” Javiell said thoughtfully.

“If it is that area of the school, surely it would likely be records? Paper work? Student files and the like? If that is where they were aiming.” Leonmar said.

_ “But why _ ? What for?” Zainmar asked, but everyone shook their heads.

Kylo sighed in frustration. “Perhaps Han will tell me, I’ll try and ask him tomorrow… I’m going to go over and see how Rey is.” He was wired now, full of nervous energy.

“Absolutely not.” Inagalan said.

Kylo blinked, “What? Why not?”

“A: Jess is there, B: Rey needs to rest, and C: you are exhausted, it isn’t safe for you.” Ingalan answered and the others nodded agreement.

Kylo stood, “I’m fine now!” But as he made to go over to the window they moved to block him.

“Can’t you talk with her, you know, in your head?” Zainmar suggested helpfully, as the Knights presented Kylo with a united front.

He glared at them, but they didn’t budge an inch and he threw up his hands, “Fine. But if she wants me to come over, _ I am going over. _ ”

He sat back down on the bed, shut his eyes and reached out along the connection he had with Rey. Everything was dark though, Rey was fast asleep.

He opened his eyes and sighed, “She’s asleep. Can we at least go for a walk? I’m buzzing here.”

Ingalan shook his head as he and the others sat down again. “We are on lock down, no way we are getting out of the dorm tonight. I think the teachers are worried people will go poke around the what’s left of the library.”

Kylo sighed again. “Whiskey and cards?” Leonmar suggested, somehow producing both from upon his person. It would have to do, Kylo supposed. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey woke with difficulty, it was like crawling slowly out of a small dark tunnel into the light. Her head hurt and her mouth felt gritty; actually her whole body felt gritty.

She opened her eyes and sighed, which made her cough so much her ribs hurt.

“Rey?” Came a bleary voice and Rey almost jumped out of her skin. She looked up to see Jess blinking down at her in the grey pre-dawn light.

“Jess?” Rey croaked, then coughed again. 

Jess hopped up off the bed and handed Rey a glass of water. “How are you feeling? You’ve slept for like ten hours straight and you missed dinner.”

“Ugh. So that’s why I’m starving… But why are you here?” Rey asked as she downed the water.

“Mara thought it would be a good idea if you weren’t alone. We didn’t want to wake you.”

“Oh... Thanks.” Rey said, feeling slightly awkward and surprised her body had allowed her to sleep at all with someone else in the room, someone other than Kylo that is. She rubbed a hand across her face then grimaced, “I need a shower… It's still 5.30am, why don’t you go back to sleep, and I’ll have a shower and raid the kitchen for food.”

“There’s a tray of food on your table, it’s cold stuff so it should still be okay.” Jess said through a yawn.

Rey’s stomach growled, shower or food first? Judging by the state of her hands, a shower would have to be first, unless she wanted to use soot and dirt as seasoning.

She hauled herself out of her nest and stood on wobbly legs. “You sure you’re okay?” Jess asked, looking slightly more alert.

Rey waved a hand at her, “I’m fine, seriously. Go back to sleep, I’m going to take a shower.” She rummaged in her wardrobe and grabbed some clothes before heading to the bathroom.

The shower was blissful, but she had to wash her hair three times before it was sufficiently clean and she felt fit to get out and dressed.

Considering the yesterday’s events, she wasn’t in bad shape, mainly tired, bruised and achy, but no serious cuts or burns. She reached out briefly to feel for Kylo, but his mind was dark and he was clearly deeply asleep.

She pulled on jeans and a t-shirt, deciding she’d get into her uniform later. When she got back to her room she found Jess snoring softly, so Rey quietly took the tray of food downstairs so she wouldn’t wake her up again.

To her surprise she found Luke and Leia sitting in the lobby with Mara. They all stopped talking abruptly as she stepped off the stairs, as if they had been saying something she mustn’t hear.

“Rey, how are you feeling?” Leia said as she stood and made her way quickly over to where Rey had stopped short.

Rey batted down her suspicions, “I’m okay.” She said, then blushed as her stomach gurgled loudly. 

“Well, why don’t you come and sit in the common area to eat… There is something we need to discuss.” And with that ominous statement Leia moved off into the kitchen.

After a brief look at Mara and Luke, Rey followed her. There was a pause as Rey and Leia sat opposite each other, then Leia gestured to the tray, “Eat, you must be hungry.” 

Rey had a strong sense of deja vu- she was pretty sure those had been Leia’s exact words to her on Sunday as well. But she shrugged it off and started eating.

Leia was quiet for a time, then said carefully, “During the fire, once the school had been evacuated, someone broke into the school office...”

Rey paused to look at her, cold chicken suspended between her plate and her mouth as she waited for Leia to drop the other shoe.

“There were a number of things taken, and at first we assumed it had been a robbery, though an odd choice of location. It seems likely that the fire was a… distraction. Though an extreme one to say the least… However, after I and Luke searched through everything again, we noticed your files were missing.”

Rey blinked. “My what?” She said incredulously, the food she was holding fell back onto her plate as she stared at Leia. “ _ Why? _ ”

Leia shook her head, “We don’t know… This may be unrelated, but a man did come into the reception yesterday morning, asking to see you. He claimed he was your uncle, but there was something…  _ off _ about him and he was informed he would have to come back with some sort of proof before he would be allowed to see you.”

Rey’s ears were ringing, she swallowed, “What did he look like?” She asked quietly.

“It was Luke who met him. He said he was about six foot tall, stocky build, brown eyes and hair, and tanned skin. Luke did say there was little resemblance to you, but does that ring any bells?”

Rey shook her head, frowning, her food now completely forgotten. Tanned skin… Desert skin perhaps? Could this be the person she saw, or thought she saw, at the Galaxy shopping centre? She didn’t even consider the possibility of them being a relation. She’d given up on the idea of her family coming back for her quite some time ago. No, this was something else,  _ but what? _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo awoke with a banging post disaster/post whiskey headache, to find Luke sitting calmly on his chair.

Kylo groaned, shutting his eyes before opening them again in the hopes that Luke would have disappeared. He hadn’t.

“What do you want?” He asked irritably as he sat up slowly.

“We need to talk. Han filled me in on some details, so I am up to speed. There are some things about that we need to talk about, and there are some things about the fire I need to tell you.” Luke’s voice was serious, its tone bringing Kylo fully awake. He looked at the clock, it was 6.15am no wonder he felt like hell. “Couldn’t this have waited till later?” 

“I don’t think so.” Luke said and handed Kylo a bottle of water.

Kylo sighed as he drank some then gestured for Luke to get on with it.

“There is too much to get into everything now, but when I said not to tell anyone else about your...  _ Abilities, _ I was in earnest. Be careful when practicing telepathic communication in front of people, you may be silent, but often your face will betray your feelings. And  _ do not  _ heal in front of  _ anyone _ . I understand you couldn’t let Chewie die, but please don’t do it again, unless it is absolutely necessary.” 

“Han said something about grandfather having something like this?” Kylo asked hesitantly. Luke and Leia rarely spoke about their father and he had been dead before Kylo was born.

Luke shifted uncomfortably, his eyes slid away from Kylo’s and he grimaced. “Yes, your grandfather did… Your mother and I also, to some extent, though nothing like you and Rey, it would seem.”

“Wait! Why haven’t I been told of this before now?” Kylo asked, he couldn’t decide whether to be angry or excited.

Luke sighed, “We had hoped you would just never develop anything, or at least never tap into your innate abilities… It is part of the reason I have tried to work with you to control your temper.”

So many questions crowded Kylo’s mind, he had no idea where to even start, but Luke cut him off before he could open his mouth.

“There will be time to talk about these things later. For now, just remember not to tell anyone.  _ Anyone,  _ okay?” 

“Okay, but when do we get to talk? Why not now?” Kylo asked, his frustration leaking into his voice.

“Soon.” Luke promised vaguely. “We need to talk about the fire. Your mother and I think it was a diversion-”

“Yeah, that’s what we thought, but a diversion for what?” Kylo interrupted excitedly.

“If you’ll be quiet, I can tell you, or at least tell you what it looks like.” Luke said dryly and Kylo shut his mouth.

“It would be better if this does not become common knowledge though… At first it seemed as though it was a diversion for a robbery. Things had been taken from the school office and reception, petty cash, electronic goods and the like, but after your mother and I made a second, more careful search, we found that any information regarding Rey, including her files, had been taken.”

Kylo was suddenly very aware of the blood in his temple throbbing as he tried to process what Luke had just told him… Perhaps he should just tie Rey to her bed and keep her there for the foreseeable future, or better yet, tie her to _his bed_ … He quashed those thoughts, aware his brain was crumbling and tried to think coherently again.

Luke stayed blessedly silent as Kylo thought; clearly it was time to share some information.

“Something happened on Saturday that may be pertinent to what happened yesterday…” He said slowly, then carried on as Luke leaned forward, one eyebrow raised.

“Rey and I both felt..  _ Something _ . A feeling, like there was something wrong, or  _ someone _ wrong watching us. We both felt it independently when we met outside the front of the school on Saturday afternoon. And I thought I saw someone disappear into the trees, but I can’t be a one hundred percent certain… Rey said she had the same feeling when she was out shopping earlier in the day as well… And yesterday, it was that same feeling that made us pick up weapons when we left the studio when the fire alarm rang.”

Luke leant back in the chair, silent for a moment. Kylo finished his water as he waited for him to say something.

Luke stood abruptly, “Thank you for telling me. I will keep you informed of any developments. For now, trust your instincts Kylo; if you feel that something is wrong, tell someone. And  _ do not _ go and investigate on your own- please make sure Rey understands that also. If you are unsure about anything, go with your gut. And no sneaking out after curfew or off school grounds, okay?”

Kylo nodded, feeling overwhelmed and unprepared, but for what, he wasn't sure.

“I’ll see you later, get dressed, Rey is already downstairs.”

 

 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So writing seems to be slowly picking up again *Crosses-all-her-fingers-and-toes* even if it is just filler, hopefully, it is better than nothing.  
> Thank you for reading, you guys are so lovely <3  
> All hail to Autonomee, for she is the best of Betas ^_^


	56. Temptation Waits

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is later than planned, it is not completely edited, but hopefully readable!  
> There will be smut...  
> 

 

After a quick wash and swiftly pulling on his uniform, Kylo hurried downstairs, he needed to touch Rey, to feel her, he needed to see her with his own eyes. But when he got downstairs, she was nowhere to be found.

Luke had also disappeared so Kylo ended up having to ask Mara. “She was down early yes, I think she said she was going for a walk.”

“What, _on her own_?” Kylo asked worriedly, “I thought we were still on lockdown?”

Mara patted his arm briefly, “Your Mother okayed it, Kylo. Chewie appeared at the door and went with her. I’m sure she will be back soon.”

Kylo pulled his hands through his hair in frustration and ran back up stairs to grab a jacket, before hurrying out of the dorm.

Once he was out, having ignored whatever Mara had been yelling at him, he paused, eyes shut, trying to pinpoint Rey’s direction.

She was partially blocked, but he got a lock on her and headed off at an easy lope. There was an odd mix of emotions coming from her mind, it felt… secretive, determined and… _and gleeful._ Just what was she up to?

He found her at the edge of the grounds, behind the dorm for years nine and ten. She was hurrying away from the small nature area, a slightly guilty look on her face.

Her face smoothed when she saw him, and warmth hummed through the bond, with a tiny tinge of smugness.

Chewie reached Kylo first, grinning as he ran and jumped up to put paws on Kylo’s shoulders, almost knocking him over. “Chewie! _Get down_ , idiot!”

Chewie laid a long lick up Kylo’s cheek before bounding off to bark excitedly at a squirrel. Rey was laughing as Kylo wiped his cheek with his sleeve.

She stopped when he closed the distance between them, pulled her roughly to him, one hand behind her neck and another gripping her waist and crushed his lips to hers.

He felt her surprise with satisfaction as he drank her in, reveling in the sensations of her skin and lips, her tongue and scent.

When he finally put her down, her eyes were wide and she was breathless. He didn’t show her the satisfaction he felt at his effect on her though.

He grasped her head in his hands and brought his face close to her’s, “Don’t you, ever, _ever_ do that again.” He told her, his satisfaction bleeding away as he remembered the horrors of yesterday and the threats of today. _“Ever._ ”

She frowned up at him, confusion on her face, “Do what?” She asked, in a puzzled voice.

 _Light! Give me strength!_ He couldn’t help growling in frustration at her ability to ignore her personal safety, making the beast stir in its cage, muttering in its sleep. “Run away, straight _into_ danger! Climb into a bloody burning building and then jump out of the _fucking window!”_

She had the nerve to roll her eyes at him, folding her arms and lifting her chin as she said, “What, I should have just left those kids to die?”

Kylo threw his hands into the air, “No! But, we find a teacher or you tell me what the hell you are planning and we work it out together!”

Rey merely raised her eyebrow at him, “Because you would have let me go up if I’d suggested it? No one here can climb as fast as I can. No one here knows how to jump from heights without really hurting themselves.” He knew she wasn’t boasting, it was all true, but that still didn’t make it okay. He hated how reasonable she was making her rash actions sound. “We would have had to pause to explain to a teacher, they wouldn’t have believed us and the fire brigade would be searching the ashes for those kids’ remains. I just did what was necessary.”

Kylo deflated, still angry but seeming unable to think up a suitable retort. She let out a sigh, pulling him against her as she wrapped her arms around him and rested her head over his heart. “I’m sorry I worried you.” She said softly in a conciliatory tone.

He hugged her tightly and kissed her hair. “Just, _please,_ next time, don’t go solo okay?”

She snorted softly into his chest, “Next time?”

He couldn’t share her amusement though, there was an unbearable feeling of inevitability humming under his skin.

She sensed it, tilted her head to look up at him, “Relax, Kylo. _I’m here_... Shall we go get breakfast?”

He nodded and laced his hand with hers as they started walking towards the refectory, trying to think of other things. “What were you doing up here anyway?” He asked, and felt a little opaqueness shimmer through her mind. She shrugged nonchalantly. “I wanted a walk, so did Chewie, he chased a squirrel over there.”

 _She was lying._ A flicker a hurt rippled through him, “If you don’t want to tell me, it doesn't matter, but please don’t lie to me.”

He immediately felt guilt surge through her and she pulled him to a stop. “I’m sorry, Kylo.” She said softly, looking up into his eyes, then moved her gaze away again. He reminded himself of her harsh life up until now, trust would be difficult, it would come with time.

He squeezed her hand in his and they started walking again, enjoying the cool breeze and quiet, save for the bird song and the pounding of Chewie’s paws. It seemed Chewie was fine, none the worse for his brush with death yesterday. Thank the light.

Chewie peeled off towards the workshop after shoving his head at them in farewell as they turned towards the main school building.

When he and Rey got to the refectory, they found it crowded, everyone talking excitedly about the fire. They had only just entered when a small body surrounded by long blonde hair collided with Rey and attached itself firmly around her waist, clinging on like a limpet.

Rey froze, looking almost horrified, to Kylo’s amusement. He glanced up to see Leia approaching them, another small student, a boy, following her closely.

“Maybe let go now, Meagbran.” Leia said gently, and the girl who had been clinging onto Rey reluctantly let go and stepped back slightly, staring up at Rey through her thick curtain of hair. Rey’s confusion and embarrassment, mixed in with a heady awkwardness filtered through their bond.

“Rey, this is Caybry,” Leia gestured to the boy by her, “And Meagbran.” She indicated the girl. “You helped them out of the library yesterday. They wanted to say thank you.”

Rey looked almost like a cornered animal. _Burning building? Fine, two pre-teens? Seemingly terrifying._

“It wasn’t just me,” Rey said slightly stiffly, “Kylo” Rey pointed almost accusingly at him, “And his friends helped you too.”

Meagbran just beamed up at her, but Caybry shook his head slightly, “But you were the one that got us out.”

Rey shrugged uncomfortably, “That’s okay.”

Kylo caught Leia hiding a smile, the gesture made him feel oddly warm. “Okay you two, back to the nurse’s office now, we need to check your dressings. I will see you tomorrow Rey, for our session.” She said lightly as she took Meagbran’s hand and pulled the reluctant girl away as Caybry walked by her side.

“Are you scared of children, Peanut?” Finn said as he walked over from the tables all their friends were sitting at.

Rey jumped slightly and Kylo couldn’t help smirking. “No.” She told Finn flatly, then grimaced. “Not when I don’t have to talk to them anyway.” Finn laughed as he flung an arm around her in a hug.

It turned out Rey had had last night’s dinner for breakfast so she only got herself a mug of tea. The others made room as they sat down, then bombarded both he and Rey with questions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey glared at everyone and they stopped talking. “Kylo, eat your breakfast.” She told him and smirked slightly when he looked shocked.

She looked back up at the others, “We are both fine. The two kids are fine. We were lucky. The fire is being investigated. Other than that, you will have to ask a teacher.” She said succinctly, then sipped her tea.  

She watched as the Knights looked blandly at the rest of the table, and Poe and Finn shifted slightly guiltily but held their silence.

“But Rey-Rey, what _happened_?” Kenjad asked earnestly and Rey sighed, then shrugged. “I heard them yelling from a window; I have good hearing. The fire looked bad and I am good at climbing so I went up on the roof and smashed in the skylight, went down and got the kids back up on the roof. The others helped them down via the drain pipe. I had to jump out the window.”

 _“Wow.”_ Breathed Maritan, Kenjad’s eyes were wide in her delicate face. Jess just grinned at her, “That’s my girl!” Rey felt a blush creep up her cheeks.

“You ever thought of being a stunt double?” Shaadr asked her and Rey frowned.

“I don’t know what that is?” This seemed to excite all the boys and they all started eagerly explaining what one was. It seemed like an odd sort of profession yet Rey would be lying if it she said it wasn’t intriguing.

As the conversation moved elsewhere, Rey felt the comforting warmth of Kylo’s hand on her thigh under the table. She had missed his presence last night.

As they stood to get their things together for the start of lessons, Jess said, “Rey, do you want another swimming lesson after school? I’m free and so is the pool.”

Rey hesitated for a moment then nodded firmly, she had to get back in the water sometime, and this was a fear and a skill she intended to master. “That would be great.”

~ ~ ~

Despite being tired, the day went by quickly, occasionally Rey would feel a niggly fear about getting in the pool later but she would push it aside, distracting herself with what she had managed to obtain this morning, before Kylo had found her.

That subject would make her grin on the inside. The fire had been a suitable diversion for her as well as whoever had started it. It was almost time to deal out some judgement on Hux.

And it would be delicious…

~ ~ ~

In the end, her lesson with Jess went really well, it was partly due to Jess not only being a good teacher, but also being Rey’s friend. She could extend her a certain amount of trust. That, and it was only them in the pool.

By the end, Rey had managed to swim on her own, if inelegantly, and had even gone out of her depth. She felt a bone deep satisfaction over this, and couldn’t help grinning at Jess as they left the pool and Jess slung an arm around her waist.

“You did good! We’ll have you swimming like your shark boy in no time.” Jess said and Rey barked a startled laugh. “By the way? You two need a rematch. All the boys are refusing to pay up, even though you clearly won your sparring session yesterday.”

“How rude.” Rey said and Jess nodded. “I know! They just don’t like it cos they lost and they’re stupid boys.” Rey nodded absently, remembering her and Kylo’s bet, she’d have to mention it later, surely he would concede she had won… Oh, who was she kidding, _of course_ he wouldn’t. “Bloody stubborn muscle-bound idiots, the lot of them.” Rey muttered.

Jess laughed, “Muscle-bound! I like it, and it is very apt, especially for those Knights… Mind you, muscle-bound does look good naked…”

Rey suddenly wondered what Kylo looked like without any clothes on and she blushed, making Jess cackle even more as they took to the showers.

As they got dressed, Rey swallowed thickly and asked, “Jess? Have _you_ … seen a guy naked?”

Jess gave a somewhat throaty laugh, “A lady never kisses and tells.” She quipped, then gave Rey a sly look. “But then again, I am no lady… Yeah. I have.” Rey blinked at Jess’s slightly pink cheeks, hesitated then asked, “What… exactly, do you do with… it? I mean, them?”

Jess regarded Rey seriously, pausing putting on her shoes. “You sure you’re ready?”

Rey shifted, “I’m not sure. But I don’t know… well, anything really.” She shrugged uncomfortably, cheeks burning. “I want to be able to… reciprocate. Kylo’s, err, done some... Good... things? But I have no idea what I’m doing.”

Jess’s eyebrows raised, “Some good things, eh? Okay, girlfriend. I’ll skip sports club, this takes priority. We’re going back to the dorm, and you, I and our girls can have a nice talk. Kylo won’t know what hit him.”

Rey felt rather panicked at the prospect of that, it must have shown on her face because Jess gave her an encouraging smile. “Don’t worry, this sort of thing stays between us girls, and we’ll add some liquid courage to take the edge off.”

 ~ ~ ~

Kylo and the Knights were just leaving the gym as she and Jess were and they walked back together. Rey marvelled at the way Jess flirted so easily with Ingalan, Leonmar and Zainmar. Javiell seemed uninterested however and she wondered briefly about that, but Kylo distracted her by asking her about swimming.

“It went well, actually.” She answered, unable to keep some surprise out of her voice, then changed the subject, catching him off guard. “So, since I won our bout yesterday, I believe payment is required.”

Kylo made an indignant sound, “We didn’t actually finish, if you recall. I did not yield and was not incapacitated for a count of twenty, so no, there is no debt between us.” There was a hint of chagrin filtering through the bond.

Rey smirked, “Well, _that is_ a shame. You may have liked your forfeit.” She said as lightly as she could, walling off any thoughts that may give him an idea of what she meant.

He looked down at her, eyes startled, a light blush colouring his cheeks. “Oh really?” He was trying for levity but fell somewhat short. “We could always compromise. Both do our forfeits?”

Rey tilted her head to the side, as if considering. “I’ll have to think about it.” She told him as they entered the dorm. “Shall I see you at dinner? Jess needs me for a bit.”

And before he could pull her to him for a kiss, she stepped lightly away and moved swiftly with Jess through the common area and into the lobby.

“Nicely done.” Jess murmured in her ear as they started the stairs. “That was the hook and line, all we need to add is the sinker and he’ll be putty in your hands.” Rey wasn’t sure what that meant, but was petty sure that Kylo would never be _‘putty_ ’. It had however, been quite amusing.

She could feel him tentatively probing their bond, but she was getting rather good a blocking things off though, and he got nothing from her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo’s skin was flushed, his blood hot, yet Rey had somehow managed to avoid him getting hold of her and disappeared with Jess.

He ran his hand through his hair distractedly and moved away from the door himself. Trying to puzzle out what her forfeit could be.

Any attempt to lift it from her mind was blocked, and his imagination ran rampant as he, the Knights and some of Poe’s lot played Halo.

Consequently, he kept dying and eventually just watched as the others played, his mind elsewhere. He had to give up trying to work out what Rey would want, at least she thought he may have liked it, so that meant it wouldn’t involve a knife. He fell to wondering about the noises she’d make if he got to suck her toes.

By the time they left the dorm for dinner, he was tense. Desire burning within him as if his body was trying to contain the sun, if he wasn’t careful it would escape his grasp.

He felt Rey as she moved towards the refectory, energy seemed to crackle in his blood and bones.

The anticipation was killing him. After what seemed like ages, she entered with the other girls, she was laughing with them, pink cheeked as she came through the door, but her head jerked up and power crackled between them, their eyes fixed on each other.

Kylo made himself turn away, it was either that, or leap up, grab her, and carry her straight back to his room.

He took steadying breaths. Trying desperately to calm down. He’d done this to himself, imaginations could be troublesome bastards.

He had managed some measure of control by the time she slid into the seat next to him with her tray of food.

“Hey,” She said softly, touching his arm briefly but jumping slightly as a spark leaped between them. “Are you okay?”

 _Stars!_ She was wearing that scent again. He started breathing more lightly. “I’m okay.” He lied.

Then as she frowned, he added, _ <I just really, _ **_really,_ ** _want to get you alone. > _

She smirked at him as she started to eat. _ <Would you like to know why?> _

She raised her eyes to him. _ <If you recall, on Monday I promised to make you orgasm, again and again.> _ Her eyes widened and she dropped them back to her plate. He could feel her trying to suppress a deep blush. _ <Sadly, we were distracted. So, in recompense, I’ll double it.> _

He caught the small sound of a gasp from her slightly parted lips. Provoking her was bringing him some measure of relief, and a significant amount of enjoyment.

She must have felt it though, because she sat up straighter in her chair and without making eye contact sent, _ <Would you like to know what my forfeit would be?> _

He breathed carefully, _ <Not unless you are willing to agree to the compromise.> _

He caught the barest curve of her lips, _ <I would like to see you, completely... naked.> _

And Kylo could not stop his eyebrows from climbing into his hair, admittedly he hadn’t known what to expect but this had not occurred to him. He refused to allow his mind to explore the possibilities right now. _ <And I would more than happily oblige. So long as I get to suck your toes and make you come for me.> _

She paused to swallow, then reached out and had a drink, before replying with just one word. _ <Deal.> _It was such a little thing, and yet it almost made the sun burst from his skin and consume the whole refectory in flame.

 

They didn’t touch each other for the rest of the evening. It was an unspoken, and _unthought,_ agreement. In all honesty he wasn’t sure what would happen when they finally did.

Eventually Kylo sent, _ <You know, it’s really dark and cold and I don’t think I’d be noticed going over the roof if I am careful.> _

He would have been amused by how quickly she shot up from the sofa she had been sitting on with Jess and the other girls, if he wasn’t so consumed with need.

She didn’t reply straight away, just wished everyone goodnight and quickly disappeared. _ <Give me ten minutes.> _

He stayed as still as he could, heart beating in his throat as he waited. He was just getting to his feet, when Finn touched his arm, “Are you and Rey okay? Things seemed a bit strained between you two all evening.”

Kylo pushed down his irritation. Finn was Rey’s friend, basically her brother. He had to be civil. “We are fine. Just been a tense few days.” He realised his voice may have been somewhat curt when Finn’s face hardened a little. “Thanks, though.” He added hoping that would be enough, but he didn’t stay to see.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey was nervous and excited. The wild tension that had built between she and Kylo all evening had become scorching. To her embarrassment her pants were somewhat slick by the time he had suggested coming over early.

She washed her face with cool water, then her feet, feeling rather foolish, and reapplied some deodorant. The girls had talked her into trying out a pair of the ridiculous underwear that they had covertly added to her bag when they had been shopping.

Rey upended the bag on her mattress and looked doubtfully a the four different items, unsure which ones would be best. After a moment of staring at them blankly she picked a pair of black lacy ones. They were sort of see through, but covered more of her than the others... And Kylo did like black.

She redressed, then tidied up, slid the lock on her door home, opened the window and turned off the light, so should there be anyone outside watching, Kylo wouldn’t be silhouetted as he came in.

She paced her room as she waited. She could feel him as he moved through the darkness, steadily towards her.

By the time he dropped down onto the window sill, her skin was vibrating in anticipation, the hairs on the back of her neck stood up and she was painfully aware of the stiff peaks of her nipples inside her bra.

He paused, crouching on the sill, like a predator watching its prey, preparing its bunched muscles to strike.

A slight breeze carried his scent to her and she couldn’t stop a small sound from escaping her throat.

It was the catalyst he needed. One moment he was still, and then next she was up against the door of her room, his hot mouth finding her neck and his hands leaving scorch marks as they slipped under her top and caressed her skin.

His nipped at her pulse and she arched her body into his, baring her neck to his teeth and tongue. Her hands curved round his waist till they were behind him, she moved them lower and squeezed the firm muscles of his backside, he made a low, hungry noise in his throat.

His hands echoed hers, but after squeezing her briefly he surprised her by picking her up and she snaked her legs around his waist to anchor herself.

He sat on the bed, the new position causing the hot space between her thighs to connect with his body.

Rey saw sparks behind her closed eyelids at the sensation, gasping, while he growled low in his throat. _ <I need to touch you, now.> _ It was urgent, almost a command. She nodded in the darkness and he tipped her sideways onto the mattress as he moved her legs and stood up. His hands went to the fly of her jeans and then paused, with great effort, _ <Can I take your jeans off>. _

_ <Yes!> _ was all she could manage and he had them off her in seconds, throwing them over his shoulder as he took her in.

“Fuck.” The word was like a prayer and an expletive all at once. _ <When did you get those?> _ his mind felt strained as his fingers gently ran up her legs as he gazed at the black lace covering her. _ <Shopping> _ she answered distractedly. She wanted, she needed, why was he  pausing?

He chuckled, the timbre of it made her shiver.

He sat on the bed, lifting one of her legs onto his lap as he stroked her calf muscle, then he turned to look at her, brought his mouth down to her foot and took her two middle toes into his mouth slowly.

Rey had assumed it would just tickle. _She was wrong._ The heat of his mouth and the feel of his teeth and tongue and lips in such an odd, yet strangely sensitive place had her gasping, but stifling giggles at the same time.

She tried to pull her foot away from him but he had a firm grip on her ankle, so all she really succeeded in doing was rolling around on the mattress.

When he finally let go, Rey could feel the black lace had become damp. He ran his hand up the inside of her leg and gently brush fingertips over the lace and she couldn’t stop her hips from jerking at the featherlight touch.

She could see him smirk in the light of the half moon as he crawled up her body then settled himself on his side next to her. “Are you ready to come for me?” He asked softly as he ran the tip of his finger along the inside of the waist of the lace.

She couldn’t seem to form words but made a needy little noise that had him chuckling once more as he stroked her again, lightly over the lace.

She pushed against his hand to get more pressure and he drew his fingers away as his kissed her softly. _ <Ah, ah, ah. Such an impatient little Scavenger.> _

How could he be so rampantly lustful one moment and so restrained the next? It was infuriating!

But then his hands slipped inside the lace and it was bliss and ecstasy as he worked his magic on her body.

As the world whited out she felt him drawing the lace down her legs and away, then his hand was back, caressing her again as she bit down on her wrist. This time when she came he slipped a finger inside her, and it was shocking and she needed it and it felt so, _damn, good._

“I love how wet you are.” He murmured in her ear as she came down again, and it seemed it was somehow possible for her cheeks to blush hotter than they already were. _ <Will you let me taste you?> _ Rey’s mind scrambled to try and work out what he meant, trying to remember if that related to anything the other girls had mentioned but she was unable to make her mind work properly. He sensed her confusion, for he kissed her again and explained as he sucked her lower lip. _ <I want to kiss you between your legs.> _

An image of him licking his fingers after touching her the first time flashed into her head and she felt her skin prickle with heat and goosebumps at the same time.

But she resolutely shook her head, _ <Maybe later. It’s my turn now.> _ She rolled onto her side and sat up, then stood on weak legs and pulled him to stand by his belt. “I’m going to undress you.” She told him as he looked down at her, with fire in his eyes, but before she could make a start he kissed her, urgently, making her legs tremble even more, till his hands on her bare hips were supporting most of her weight. _ <You’re cheating!> _She accused him and he pulled away, his teeth grazing her lip as he did. “I’m all yours.” He told her, voice husky.

Rey took a deep, steadying breath. Then slowly lifted his top up, when she got to the shoulders, she paused to lick around his left nipple, then flicked her tongue over the tip and sucked it into her mouth, biting down as he gasped with pleasure. She moved to the other and gave it the same treatment as she ran her nails from his shoulders down his back, deepening the pressure as they descended. He hissed and she felt his pleasure spike through the bond.

She pulled his t-shirt up more till it covered his face and then left it there, pressing on his shoulders till he sat on the edge of the bed. She moved his thighs apart and stood between them as his hands came to rest on her bare backside.

She ignored how that felt as best she could and and tilted his head back, kissing his exposed throat with soft lips... then she bit him, opening her mouth wide enough to encircle his trachea. He really did seem to like a certain amount of pain. Suddenly he gripped her legs and parted them while lifting her so her legs were either side of his torso again and suddenly he hand was between her legs, strumming expertly despite the fact that he couldn’t see.

It was such a different position to previously, so much more vulnerable… and _sweet hell,_ he was tipping her over the edge again. She dug her nails into his shoulders as she came, biting down on the meat of his trapezius, so she wouldn’t make too much noise.

She shook like a leaf as he lazily caressed her again, _ <You. Are. Cheating. Again.> _ He reluctantly drew his hand away, her bones were currently about as solid as water so she stayed where she was to remove his t-shirt fully.

She carelessly threw it away. “I think I may need your help standing up.” She said softly, eliting another of those deep, satisfied chuckles from him. He definitely needed taking down a peg.

Once she was on her feet she ran her fingers down his chest to his belt and undid it, then paused as she realised he still have his trainers on. She pushed him to sit on the bed again then knelt on the floor and removed his shoes and socks, amused to find his feet were also slightly ticklish. She ran a nail up the centre of his sole, holding his foot firmly as he tried not to react. She stood again and he followed, she took a deep breath, undid his fly and slowly drew his jeans down his legs till they were on the floor and he stepped out of them.

There was a slight flavour of uncertainly, perhaps shyness filtering through the bond as he stood in nothing but his boxers, she was tempted to tease him about it but refrained, afraid it would sully the moment.

She slipped her fingers lightly into his boxers waistband and paused as his breathing hitched, aware of her heart speeding up. She looked up at his face and he nodded slightly and she pulled them down...

Of course she had seen male genitalia before, but never in any circumstance that she wanted to, and never had she paused to have a good look.

She stepped back, starting at his ankles and slowly raised her eyes, working her way up to it. His pale body looked like an it had been perfectly sculpted in marble, a statue of a god or an angel. And his… she swallowed, and looked up at his face to find him watching her uncertainly, she seemed to have lost the use of her tongue. _ <I didn’t know they got that.. big.> _ He stifled a surprised bark of laughter, and she felt rather foolish, dropping her eyes from his face. He closed the space between them, taking her chin and raising it so she was looking at him again, his lips curved in a gentle smile and he kissed her, softly, slowly, chasing any insecurities she felt away.

As they broke apart he carefully drew her top up and pulled it off her, then undid her hair, letting it fall loose around her shoulders as he undid her bra and discarded it too.

And then there they were, both completely bare. She carefully reached down a hand and brushed her fingers on his hard length, feeling it twitch at her touch, hearing him hiss at the contact.

It was incredibly hot as she grasped it, the skin soft, yet it was so hard as it pulsed beneath her fingers. She gripped it and started to move, and he shuddered at the motion, moaning her name as his hands came up to caress her sides, her breasts, grip her arms. _ <Oh, stars, yes, yes, oh yes, stars, Rey! I can’t, I can’t, you need to stop or I’ll-> _

He gripped her wrist, halting her movement, breath coming harsh. ”No, not yet, not till you let me taste you.” He said, voice strained but determined. Rey tightened her grip and he groaned, _ <Please!> _ It was somewhat confusing, his obsession about pleasing her before himself. _ <Your pleasure brings me pleasure.> _ Even his voice in her mind sounded ragged.

She released him and he drew her back to the bed, pushed her down to sit and pressed her shoulders back so she lay half on the bed with her feet were still on the floor but her. He knelt and gently pressed her knees apart, reaching his hands underneath her hips as he pulled her against his mouth.

He had barely touched her when she began to quiver, hips jerking until he gripped them harder. The sound of him moaning as he used his mouth made everything ten times more stimulating. She was going to have bruises all over her wrists tomorrow.

Rey lost time, lost herself, until the pleasure became unbearable, too much for her skin to contain and she couldn’t take anymore. _ <I can’t!> _

She felt his lips curve wickedly against her, and even that slight movement shuddered through her.

It was both a relief and a acute sense of loss as he drew away, stroking her trembling legs gently as he lifted them up and turned her body so she was completely lying on the mattress.

She opened her eyes to find him looking down at her, eyes warm and full of satisfaction.

“You are delicious.” His whispered, as he ran a finger over his chin and stuck it in his mouth. She jerked, little aftershocks running through her as he gave her a ridiculous shit eating grin.

She reached down and gripped him tightly in her hand, needling to shift the balance of power and wipe that look of his face.

His eyes went round and she grinned back, then let go as an idea came to her, he looked questioningly at her as she lowered her hand and quickly slid it between her legs, unable to stop herself from jerking at the touch, then she wrapped it around his length again, slick with her come. “Oh shit!” He gasped as she started to move her hand, gaining momentum slowly, as she watched his face ripple with pleasure and need, as he finally surrendered to her.

It was an intriguing mix of vulnerability and ecstasy, as he neared release, an expression almost like pain widened his eyes.

And then it was he who was gasping, shuddering, breaking apart in her hands as he came, calling her name loudly in their minds, sending their bond humming, turning it to pure gold.

He reached out and pulled her against him, as his muscles trembled and his breathing slowed.

They looked at each other, eye to eye. “I love you.” He whispered the words against her lips, as if they were a sacred oath. She hugged him tighter to her, “And I love you.” There was a crackle of energy through their bond, as power flickered over their skin, almost as if it were bearing witness to something, accepting a pledge, a promise.

They were still for a moment, skin tingling, hearts beating in sync, both of them not wanting to look away from each other, or move, almost as if it would break some spell then were cast in.

 

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

 

 _Let glow red the poison sun and the flame to make me numb_  
_Let me hear the words which I have been dying to hear_  
_Burn my fingers one by one, guide me down into the sun_  
_Let me show you how I crave to make you come_

_~The Exciter by Poisonblack_

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once you go Solo, you can’t say No-oh! (I am such a child.)
> 
> Autonomee is my Beta <3 
> 
> This chapter brought to you by the songs:
> 
> ~Temptation Waits by Garbage  
> ~In For The Kill by La Roux  
> ~Can't Get Enough by Winger  
> ~Ever Dream by Nightwish  
> ~Rush by Poisonblack  
> ~Melt Into Your Eyes by Faderhead  
> ~Give It Away by Deepest Blue  
> ~Drumming Song by Florence and the machine  
> ~Bad Things by Jace Everett  
> ~Closer by Nine Inch Nails
> 
> Thank you, thank you for all the subscriptions, bookmarks, kudos and especially your comments, you are keeping me going. I only hope I am able to keep entertaining you till it’s done. <3  
> I now have a Pinterest for this fic, [Pinterest](https://www.pinterest.co.uk/AmberDDread/)  
> Not everything is exactly how I want it, but you may enjoy it anyway!


	57. Best Served Cold

**_“A vendetta va servita fredda.”_ **

 

Kylo felt like he was high, dosed up to his eyeballs on euphoria, as he drifted in a happy post orgasmic chill. With Rey’s taste in his mouth and his body in her hands he had had the most mind blowing orgasm he had ever had.

_ Stars, she had tasted so good. _ He hadn’t wanted to stop, she was intoxicating, enthralling. He felt a flicker of arousal, but suppressed it, he could feel how wrung out Rey was. He smirked to himself, it had never occurred to him you could overdose on orgasms.   

Kylo noticed Rey shiver, and reluctantly loosened his grip on her. “We should clean up and get under the covers, I don’t want you catching the flu again.”

She made an adorable noise of disappointment but allowed him to pull her up from where they lay.

Once they were clean and partly dressed, they snuggled down into the ‘nest’. Kylo pulled her head to rest on his chest over his heart and wrapped his arms around her.

An overwhelming sense of contentment filled him, reverberating through their bond. He felt Rey slip into sleep quickly. He tried not to follow; he wanted to cherish this perfect moment, but his eyes kept slipping closed of their own accord and he lost the battle.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey had slept so deeply that when she awoke it took her a while to remember where she was. Kylo was still sleeping, holding her tightly against his ridiculously warm body. Just how did he stay that warm all the time?

She smiled as she took in his face, smooth featured and peaceful. Last night… she felt the urge to squirm just thinking about it. Was it usually like that? For other people? If it was, why did anyone do anything else?

Her thoughts drifted, it was 5am… and she had a task to complete, hopefully before people were up and awake.

She grabbed a pillow and inserted it into her place in Kylo’s arms, he frowned and shifted and she felt him begin to surface from sleep.

He was coming slowly though, she had time. She pulled out the peanuts she had taken from the bird feeder in the nature area yesterday. 

Placing them on a tissue laid on her desk, she ground them into dust with the pommel of one of her larger knives, then parcelled them up and slipped it into the side of her cotton pants.

“You okay?” Kylo mumbled, peering up at her in the gloom.  _ Blood and ashes that was close!  _ She smiled at him, “Yeah, I’m just going downstairs to have a drink of water. I’ll be back in a second.”

She left her room, closing the door gently and padded downstairs on silent feet, listening carefully for any noise that would indicate someone else was about. There was a lamp on in the lobby, and she could see a dim light in the kitchen. 

She paused on the last few steps for several moments, but if anyone was down here, they were being completely silent.

Rey slunk out of shadows of the stairs and darted into the kitchen, then stood, breathing quietly. Still no sign of anyone. She forced her hands to stop trembling and found the coffee machine, dumping the contents of her tissue in, and covering the peanut bits with more coffee granules.

There was always a possibility that Hux wouldn’t have coffee today, but she could keep doing this till she got him.

As she snuck back up the stairs she felt slightly sorry that she couldn’t thank Finn for giving her the idea. Perhaps she would one day, though there was always the possibility he’d work it out.

Most people would likely assume she or one of her friends had something to do with it, but only Kylo had seen her yesterday morning, well Kylo and Chewie, but she wasn’t worried about either of them dobbing her in.

Other than that, there would be no proof. Before she went back into her room she flushed the tissue down the loo.

Kylo was awake but barely when she got back into the nest, and within moments of wrapping his arms around her, he’d sunk back into slumber with a contented sigh.

Rey didn’t go back to sleep, she had to wall up her excitement and glee, hiding it away, so Kylo wouldn’t pick up on it too much when he awoke fully.

And she prepared herself for disappointment, reminding herself it may not work straight away. 

When the sky was growing light she kissed Kylo gently awake, smiling at his sleepy protests.

“Either you go now, or stay here all day. You’d be missed and if they didn’t find you, you’d still have some awkward questions to answer.” She said softly as she stroked his silky hair away from his face.

He made grumbling noises that sounded very Chewie-like but sat up and stretched. She watched him as he dressed, enjoying the view, then stood as he opened the window.

“Don’t feel like you have to come down early, Poe is always down when I am, so I won’t be alone. And you look like you still need to sleep.”

But he shook his head, “There’s stuff we need to talk about, we were too… distracted yesterday. I’ll shower and stuff and meet you in half an hour?”

“If you insist.” She said with a shrug. He kissed her softly before going out up onto the roof.

Rey sighed and shut the window, then went and had a shower herself. They really ought to have had one last night, but it had seemed too risky. The idea of showering with Kylo gave her a few ideas and she hoped they’d have a chance to explore them one day soon.

She was pleased to find Mara and Poe in the kitchen when she got downstairs, the perfect witnesses to her arrival.

“Good morning.” She said happily as she entered the room and went about making herself tea.

“Good morning!” Poe said as BB8 twined around his legs.

“You look chipper, Rey.” Mara said, beaming at her.

Rey felt herself begin to blush, but she forced the blood out of her cheeks…  _ Wait, that was possible? _ And said truthfully, “I slept really well.”

Kylo came in shortly afterwards, ignored the surprised looks he got from Poe and Mara and gave Rey a kiss. She allowed herself to blush over that as she murmured “Good morning” to him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Poe stayed in the kitchen with Mara as Kylo and Rey took their drinks into the reading room, which was otherwise empty.

They sat on the sofa, Rey curling her legs up as she sipped at the weird concoction she claimed was tea.  

Kylo felt his heart beat pick up as he tried to work out how best to tell Rey the truth. What if she were angry with him or hurt when she knew he had been misleading her? He stared into his mug of coffee as if it held the answers he sought, but the liquid gave him nothing.

A hand on his arm made him look up. “Are you okay?” Rey asked. Kylo sighed. “Yeah... there are some things you should know... Things I need to tell you about… me.”

Her face crinkled in a little frown. “Okay.” She said slowly, “I’m listening.”

Kylo shifted, “Only the Knights know this, and I’d be grateful if you kept it that way... “ He took a deep breath, looking back down at his coffee. “Han and Leia are my parents, and Luke is my uncle.”

She stayed silent, though he could feel the confusion and shock through the bond. “And my birth name is not Kylo.”

She still didn’t offer a response and he looked up at her face, afraid of what he would see but needing to check anyway.

Her frown was more pronounced now and she shook her head slightly. “I don’t understand.”

Kylo wanted to touch her, to reach out and lace his fingers with hers, but he didn’t, unsure what her reaction would be. He ran a hand through his hair, looked down again. “Leia suggested I use a different name- no one wants to be that kid whose parents are teachers at the same school. So when I came here, I used a different name… I don’t… I don’t get on well with my parents anyway, not for a long time, and… I saw it as a chance to be someone else, and I took it.”

Saying it like that, he suddenly felt selfish, ungrateful. He’d pushed his parents away, though they had done some pushing of their own as well. He could only imagine how Rey would view this.

She stayed silent for some moments, tea forgotten in her hands. Then said, “Is that why Han called you Ben that one time?”

Kylo looked up at her face, it was blank, yet he could see the thoughts churning behind her eyes, the bond was muted. “Yeah. They still call me that when we’re alone. But I think of myself as Kylo.”

She nodded absently. He desperately wanted to know what she was thinking, but there was more she needed to know.

“Luke told me yesterday that… what is happening to us, isn’t completely unique.” Rey’s head jerked up, eyes startled as she focused on him. “Apparently my grandfather experienced something like this, and Luke and Leia also have some… abilities. He didn’t give me details, but said he would soon… He reiterated that we mustn’t tell anyone about it, or let anyone see us heal or notice when we are talking to each other in our heads.”

She nodded slowly to the last, “I guess that makes sense.”

Kylo found he couldn’t  resist asking anymore, “Are you okay? About my parents…?”

She looked up at him, and to his relief gave him a small smile. “Yeah... Though it’s quite a lot to process.”

Kylo let loose a relieved sigh and pulled her against him, she jerked her mug of tea up just before it spilt. 

“Sorry,” He muttered sheepishly into her hair. He could feel her smile through the bond.

He would have liked to just sit there and just appreciate the weight off his shoulders, but he couldn’t yet.

“Luke also confirmed that the fire was a distraction.” He felt her nod against him. “Yes... Leia told me. She said my files had been taken, which is just bizarre.” 

Kylo frowned, “Aren’t you worried?” She shrugged. “A bit, but really, why on earth would anyone care about me? I’m no one… Though Leia did say someone- a man came into the reception on Monday morning, claiming to be my uncle and asking to see me.”

Kylo felt his gut clench with fear, he was just opening his mouth to respond and insist she did not go  _ anywhere  _ without him, when shouting erupted, coming from the lobby.

They both looked at each other, then shot up out of their seats and hurried out of the reading room.

There was an inexplicably flash of excitement from her side of the bond, but it quickly disappeared. He didn’t have time to question it as they hurried into the lobby.

But rather than finding another fire or shadowy adversaries, they found Hux, collapsed on the floor, three of his lackeys milling about uselessly as Mara frantically searchedthrough a medical box by his side. Poe was at Mara’s desk, on the phone, panicked voice demanding an ambulance.

Hux looked unconscious, breath wheezing through his broken nose, throat swollen and skin mottled and angry.

Mara made a relieved noise as she found whatever she had been looking for and plunged a needle into Hux’s thigh.

Kylo knew Hux was allergic to peanuts- everyone did, the school was peanut free as a result. So how could this have happened? 

He looked down at Rey, her face was carefully, suspiciously blank as she watched the scene in the lobby.

“Kylo!” Mara shouted at him, and he jerked up to look in her direction. “I need you to run to the gym and get Luke to give you the spare epipen, I thought we had a spare but we don’t and Joselor isn’t in her office yet. Hux may need another shot before the ambulance can get here.”

Kylo grimaced,  _ help Hux? _ Why should he? Mara glared at him, “Now Kylo! Run!”

With a long suffering sigh he squeezed Rey’s hand, then took off running.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey watched in satisfaction as Hux struggled to breathe. She was somewhat disappointed that Mara seemed to be dealing with it so well, but it was still deeply pleasing, nonetheless.

“Rey! Please can you grab some cushions from the reading room? Quickly now.” Mara called at her.

Rey suppressed the urge to scowl at the request, nodded at Mara then turned and went back to the reading room. She didn’t hurry, but she didn’t linger either, her innocence must appear  unimpeachable.

When she returned and handed the cushions to Mara she was able to see that Hux’s lips had a faint blue tinge to them.

Mara got one of Hux’s lackeys to stop ineffectually flapping about long enough to lift Hux’s shoulders up and slide the cushions underneath, presumably to aid his wheezing.

“We’re going to need that other epipen.” Mara muttered to herself once she had settled Hux onto the cushions.

“Is there anything I can do, Mara?” Rey asked as artlessly as possible.

Mara flashed her a stressed half smile. “Could you clear up the broken mug and coffee, Rey?” 

Oddly Hux’s eyes fluttered when Mara said Rey’s name, perhaps it was fear? Rey didn’t bother trying to analyze it though and went into the kitchen to fetch a roll of kitchen paper and the dustpan and brush that were kept under the sink.

Poe had finished on the phone by then and together they cleared up the mess in the lobby. Kylo arrived back, clutching two epipens and handed them to Mara.

Mara glanced at her watch, nodded to herself and plunged another of the pens into Hux’s thigh.

Rey wondered if that hurt. She hoped it did.

“Rey, Poe. I want you to take the emergency keys and open the fire escapes upstairs. Kylo, please tell all the boys they need to leave for breakfast that way, rather than coming into the lobby, Rey wake Jess and ask her to tell the girls the same, while you do the door.” She fished out a huge bunch of keys from her pocket, thumbed through them, then handed one to Rey and one to Poe.

“See you outside?” Kylo asked as she headed towards the stairs and Rey nodded. She took one last look at Hux before ascending, stopping at Jess’s door on the way to fill the girls in, before going up to her floor and opening the fire escape door.

She wished she had the right tools to make herself a copy, but the drain pipe was easy enough to climb.

Before leaving herself, she went back to her room briefly to shove her favourite knife into her waistband at the back and slip a small throwing knife into a sock underneath her leggings.  _ Just in case. _

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

_ You'll never know what hit you, _ __  
_ Won't see me closing in. _ __  
_ I'm gonna make you suffer, _ __  
_ This hell you put me in. _ __  
_ I'm underneath your skin, _ __  
_ The devil within. _ _  
_ __ You'll never know what hit you.

 

_ ~The Devil Within by Digital Daggers _

 

_ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ _

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Do not ever, ever, do what Rey just did. (Yeah, I know coffee is hot, but I liked the title too much to change it)  
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee)is my Beta ♥ 
> 
> This is my Pinterest: [Pinterest](https://www.pinterest.co.uk/AmberDDread/)
> 
>  
> 
> If you are interested, here is the address to my Reylo playlist on spotify... [Reylo](https://open.spotify.com/user/ison966ehkwmwto83rm8alcda/playlist/4EkGYPbNglgbR28h1CNQuW)
> 
>  
> 
> Songs:
> 
> ~Revenge Best Served Cold by Prong
> 
> ~Aviators - Revenge 
> 
> ~Enjoy! By Angel Dust 
> 
> ~Once Upon Your Dead Body by Coheed and Cambria 
> 
> ~Meet the Monster by Five Finger Death Punch 
> 
> ~Any Means Necessary By Hammerfall 


	58. A History Of Violence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW/TW: Contains references to self harm

 

The rumour mill had gone into overdrive and the school was running rife with hearsay. Hux was dead. Hux was fine. Hux had faked it and run away to join the circus. Hux was a meth addict and was in withdrawal. Hux had been the one who started the library fire and had collapsed with guilt. Hux had attempted to kill himself because he was in love with Kylo Ren. Hux was secretly Phasma’s sister. Hux’s collapse was performance art. Rey had killed Hux. Hux was a vampire and had gone too long between feedings. Hux had made a deal with a demon and it had gone wrong… 

Rey was baffled by all of it.The rumours seemed endless and became more and more ridiculous as the day progressed. By lunchtime, everywhere you went, you could hear people whispering Hux’s name.

“What is  _ wrong  _ with everyone?” Rey asked Finn as they meandered down a corridor towards the refectory.

Finn chuckled, shaking his head. “These people are always hungry for some drama. They don’t get real problems in their lives so they make shit up. It’s funny though.”

Rey rolled her eyes at him,  _ he _ had been giddy with excitement over Kylo’s mysterious face wound just last week! She didn’t point that out though. They were silent for a few seconds, then she asked carefully, “Do you think Hux  _ is _ dead? Would we be told?”

He looked at her askance. “I don’t know. I doubt he is. That would be too much to hope for.”

Rey grinned at him. “I hope he is too… Though I would have liked to watch.”

Finn gave a slightly horrified bark of laughter. “I love you, Peanut.” He said as he slung an arm around her. “I love you too.” Rey answered, and she did. He really was her brother, her best friend. She wondered idly when or rather  _ if _ he would question her in regards to Hux’s…  possible demise.

The Knights and Poe’s friends were already seated when Rey and Finn entered the refectory, once they had grabbed food they went over and Rey slipped into a seat next to Kylo, while Finn went to sit with Poe.

Everyone at their table, like everyone else in the bloody refectory, was discussing Hux. Leojova was claiming he had heard Waykamr saying Hux had been bitten by a goose and had blood poisoning. Kenjad was shaking her head and saying there was a Succubus on campus, while Jess gagged over that and asked why even a Succubus would want to sleep with Hux. And Zainmar was loudly insisting that Hux had collapsed because he had overdosed on being a twat. It was madness. Rey turned to look at Kylo, who had taken her hand when she sat down but otherwise remained silent, rolling his eyes at everyone.

“Have you heard anything from a  _ reliable _ source?” She asked as she started eating her lunch. Kylo snorted, “I’m not sure reliable sources exist right now. At least not amongst the student body… By the way we’re training after school, do you want to join us?”

Rey smiled, then sighed as she remembered she was seeing Leia for ‘counselling’. And then it hit her. She was seeing Kylo’s  _ mother. _ To talk about her cutting herself.  _ Oh hell  _ this was going to be awkward. How was she meant to behave? Leia knew Rey and Kylo were together. Rey knew Leia was Kylo’s mother… Fuck.

“Thanks but I won’t, I have a session with Leia at 5pm, I don’t want to arrive all gross and sweaty, and there won’t be time to do much if I have to factor in a shower.”

Kylo shifted, “Okay, no worries, I’ll see you afterwards.” And he took a swallow from his water.  _ <Shit, I’d forgotten. You don’t have to tell her you know. It might be less weird?> _ He sent. Rey concentrated on finishing her yogurt.  _ <Guess it might be. I don’t think I’m ready for that.> _

Kylo squeezed her knee, the heat of his hand pushing through her skirt and leggings.  _ <Have you noticed anyone you don’t recognise today, or felt anything wrong?> _

Rey suppressed a grimace.  _ <No… If it makes you feel any better, I have two knives on me.> _

He sighed, quietly.  _ <I guess that’s a good idea. Just try not to stab anyone who doesn't pose a real threat… And make sure Leia doesn’t see them. That would be… unfortunate.” _

Rey turned so just he could see her amused grin, “That would be ironic.” She murmured before kissing him lightly. She could feel his lips quirk against hers.  _ <How are you feeling after last night?> _ his question made her shiver slightly as her thoughts went back to what had transpired in her bedroom.  _ <I’m feeling like we should do that again.> _

He chuckled, the tone of it low and dark, tugging at something deep inside her. Rey pulled away from him before he made her forget where they were.

~ ~ ~

It was odd walking the corridors of the school when there were no pupils in it. No noise, no clamour. It was slightly creepy...  _ Creepy? _ Rey shook her head at herself in disgust.

She was horribly nervous and when she got to Leia’s office she had to wipe her palms on her jeans before knocking. 

Leia opened the door with a smile, “Take a seat, Rey. I just need to get your file open on my tablet as the hard copy is missing.”

Rey sat in the chair indicated. It wasn’t very comfortable and the room was rather warm.  _ Or was that just her? _ She mentally shook herself, ignoring the various posters on the walls and studied her boots.

She was wearing the new chunky pair. They really were rather wonderful… “Would you like a glass of water?” Leia asked and Rey jerked her eyes up, flushing slightly. “Err, yes, please.” She had a feeling she was going to need it.

After pouring from a glass jug with slices of lemon floating in it, Leia handed Rey a glass and settled herself in the chair opposite, tablet on her lap, but eyes fixed firmly on Rey.

They regarded each other for a moment, Rey unsure how to proceed, nervously took a sip of her water.

“Before we begin Rey, let me assure you that whatever you say here is confidential, our sessions remain private between you and I, unless I am concerned for your safety. “

_ Sessions?  _ There would be more than one? Rey nodded, keeping her face as smooth as possible.

“I’d like to start with you telling me in your own words, some of your first memories.”

Rey blinked in confusion, “I thought I was here to talk about cutting myself?”

Leai smiled kindly, “We are. But understanding why you do it, will be key in helping you stop.”

Rey shook her head, “But I know why I do it.”

Leia opened her mouth, on the cusp of saying something, then shut it for a moment before saying, “And why do you think you do it?”

Rey frowned at her use of  _ think, _ but didn’t mention it when she answered, “They are reminders. I make them when I have made a mistake I must learn from, to remind me never to do it again, or mark an important lesson that I must not forget.”

Leia nodded, made a note on the tablet in her lap before asking, “And what was the most recent mark for?”

Rey shifted, agitation flickering inside her. “That’s private.”

Leia’s expression didn’t change, “But to help you to stop needing to do this, I need to understand what sort of things trigger your need to do it.”

Rey shrugged, “Why do I need to stop doing it? It’s something I’ve done since I was small. I don’t understand what is wrong about it.”

“It isn’t a healthy way to deal with your problems, Rey.” Leia answered gently, “You are somewhere safe now, somewhere where you do not need to punish yourself, or hurt yourself to cope with problems and difficult emotions. You are not alone, you don’t have to struggle with this by yourself.”

Rey again shook her head, she was starting to get angry. “But I’m not punishing myself. They are reminders… Sort of like how school work gets graded? Though that isn’t quite right. Maybe more a physical memory?”

“But there are other ways to remind yourself of lessons, or mistakes. Safer ways, keeping a journal, for example or painting a picture and putting it on your bedroom wall. Some ways that don’t involve harming yourself. When you cut yourself, you run the risk of infection, or losing control and hurting yourself more than you meant to… One day, it may even lead to you accidentally hurting someone else.”

Rey very almost flinched at that last bit. She wanted to say she would never hurt anyone accidentally, but her thoughts went to Kylo’s face… but she hadn’t sliced Kylo’s face because she was cutting herself,  _ that was a stupid thought.  _ She pushed it aside. “I know how to treat wounds. I have treated ones much worse than the cuts I make on myself and I never cut more than necessary.” She could see Leia thinking, trying to work out another approach, she took a sip of water. This was insufferable. She liked Leia, she did. But this was no one’s business but her own, she wasn’t affecting anyone else but herself. She would never need help from anyone else to treat her, no one would have even known if it wasn’t for her scrambling for an easy lie to tell Mara to explain the aftermath of her slicing up Kylo. And it had really come back to bite her firmly in the fucking arse.

“So how would you feel if, say, you learned a friend was cutting themselves? What would you say to them?” If Leia thought that would work, she was sorely mistaken.

“I would probably make sure they weren’t doing something extreme, something that would impact their wellbeing. I’d make sure they knew how to care for their wounds safely; but other than that, It would be none of my business. It’s their body, their choice.”

A tiny sigh escaped Leia, a small breath out, barely there, but Rey caught it. “And would you recommend it? If you had a child perhaps, would you suggest it to them as a good way to cope with things that had upset them or made an impact on them?”

Rey opened her mouth, then shut it…  _ She wouldn’t _ … Well, she never planned on having children, that wasn’t something she’d thought much about, but was fairly certain she’d never want them...  _ but if she did _ … she frowned, trying to analyse why she wouldn’t be happy about a child, her child, doing as  _ she _ did.

Leia allowed her to sit and think for a few moments, before speaking again. “Perhaps that is enough for today. I’ve already booked you in for Friday afternoon, at four for our next session, I hope that’s okay for you?”

Rey nodded, a little distractedly. “Think about what we have discussed today, and I will see you Friday, then.” 

Leia stood and Rey automatically followed suit, muttered an absent minded “Thanks” and left. She walked slowly as she thought. She was feeling somewhat confused and conflicted. She wouldn’t want her child marking themselves like that… would she mind if they did it when they were grown ups? She had to admit it would still upset her… And yet, if her hypothetical grown up child got a tattoo, that would be okay.  _ But why? _ It was still marking their body, changing their flesh. The same with piercings. Could it be the intent behind it that was what the problem was? But even then, people got tattoos to remind themselves of things that had happened to them.

The more she thought about it, the more unsure she was.  _ And she hated it.  _ She had never questioned her need, or motive behind what she did, until now.

This inner turmoil was disturbing.  _ She needed to do something.  _ It was too early to go climbing without being seen... Then she remembered her makeshift staff, it was still in her room.

Her pace picked up, her strides now purposeful. The combination of calm focus, violence and exercise were the equivalent of meditation for her.

She waved vaguely to Finn as she went through the common area but didn’t stop. When she got to her room she quickly changed into leggings, long sleeved t-shirt and trainers, then she grabbed her staff and a hoodie and hurried downstairs. She didn’t even hear Finn call out to her this time. She was blissfully sinking into the cold place.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was careful not to probe the bond during Rey’s session with his mother, he couldn’t help picking up a few stray emotional flickers but didn’t look too closely at them, trying to distract himself by sparring with the Knights, then heading to the gym to lift some weights.

They were just heading to the showers when he realised that Rey’s session would have ended over an hour ago.

He hesitantly reached out to her, but hit a cold wall. She was in that freezing void again, where he couldn’t reach her. He started to grow worried,  _ light, _ what had Leia said to her?

Kylo rushed through his ablutions, and left the gym without stopping to dry his hair. He shivered when he hit the cold air outside, but ignored it, searching carefully for the direction Rey was in. It was much harder to do when she was like this. He finally found a thread and followed it till he walked around some bushes not far from the firepit.

There she was, he paused to watch her for a few moments. He had never actually seen her use the staff unless she had been using against him. 

She was poetry in motion. Her staff a blur as she went through what looked like a kata, each movement fluid and graceful, yet also powerful and precise. She took his breath away. And he realised with shock that she really had been holding back when she sparred with him. 

After the first time he had sparred with her, he remembered Luke telling him that he had fought her too, and if she had not had to follow the rules, she may have won.  _ Against Luke _ . He had never really believed his uncle he realised, even after he got to know her. Now though, now he was fairly certain she could take down he  _ and _ Luke when she was like this. Bloody ashes.

_ And she was his.  _ He suddenly felt a rush of desire, and Rey instantly stilled in the middle of a move and spun to face him, staff raised defensively. 

Kylo gave her a lopsided smile, slightly embarrassed to be caught staring, and walked toward her.

She was breathing deeply but evenly- she wasn’t out of breath, a light sheen of sweat covered her face and her hair was messy. She was perfect.

He suddenly remembered the reason he had found her in the first place, as he felt her surface from the chilly depths. “Are you okay?” He asked, as she moved out of her pose, resting the butt of the staff she was using…  _ wait, was that just a roughly skinned stick?  _ On the floor.

She shrugged, “Yeah. Just needed something to.. Take the edge off.”

He nodded. He understood, Leia was his mother after all. “Do you want to talk about it?” He offered carefully, making sure he didn’t sound curious or like he was prying.

She gave him a small smile but shook her head. “No. At least not at the moment… Why is your hair wet?”

He blinked at the change of topic but just shrugged, “Had a shower after the gym.” She frowned at him, “You need to go and dry it or you might get ill.”

He graced her with a wry look but didn’t comment. “Are you done? It’s probably time for dinner.”

Rey sighed but nodded, “Yeah I guess. Though I need to warm down and take a shower first. Go on without me, I can see you after.” 

Kylo shook his head, “Nope. I’ll wait. Come find me in the games room when you’re ready for dinner.”

She rolled her eyes at him but nodded, and with a quick parting kiss he turned and made his way to the dorm.

He went up to his room to dump his stuff and dry his hair, (it really was cold outside). Then went and found the Knights in the games room.

He felt Rey arrive back in the dorm and he let loose a little sigh and felt his shoulders relaxed. Next time he would just wait with her… He frowned as it occurred to him that she had been on her own, out of sight from anyone. If there really were mysterious people with a interest in her, she really needed to stop taking such risks... But how to word it, without sounding like he was trying to control her? Or making her feel patronised? 

He was no nearer to a suitable answer when she came into the games room and they all got up and left to get dinner.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: If you have been affected by any issues discussed in this chapter, (or the rest of this fic) please feel free to message me, or talk to friend/family member, or visit a support website. Please know that you are not alone, you are not bad, you are not a freak, you are not worthless. ♥
> 
> I struggle with these sorts of chapters, I can’t do dialogue very well and I find action much easier to write than this sort of thing, so sorry if its a bit stilted. Also, not sure about the title... meh.
> 
> Songs:  
> ~Unbreak, Unchain by Charon  
> ~Universally Speaking by Red Hot Chili Peppers  
> ~Alive by Sia  
> ~Running Up That Hill by Kate Bush (covered by Placebo)
> 
> If people were wondering about the previous chapter, Finn tells Rey about Hux’s allergy in Chapter 13: Knightmare.


	59. So Much More Than One Spark…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW/TW: Contains scenes of a sexual nature (smut!), and some elements of BDSM (vaguely). Possibly a hint of dubcon, the barest hint.

 

Rey felt considerably more balanced after her staff exercises, yet even so she decided she would leave thinking about her session with Leia until tomorrow.

The Knights had all waited for her, which was a bit embarrassing, and they walked down to the refectory together.

It was a cold night, the sky was clear and bright with stars and the wind tried its hardest to worm its way into Rey’s coat.

She missed the heat of Jakku, it may be beautiful and green here, but sometimes Rey craved the scorching kiss of burning sand and the penetrating, bone deep warmth of the desert sun.

When they entered the refectory, Poe’s group were finishing their meals, but they lingered as she and the Knights ate. The topic of conversation still circled back to Hux, _a lot._

At least they were now more interested in _how_ someone had got to him rather than what they thought may have happened. Thankfully no one mentioned the nature area.

“Bet you’re pleased though, Rey. This must feel like a win for you.” Kenjad said, and everyone’s eyes swung to regard Rey.

She carefully swallowed her mouthful and shrugged, allowing herself a small smile, “I don’t hate it.”

Jess grinned, “Poe said you and Kylo were there and saw it happen too.”

“No, we came out of the reading room after he had collapsed, he was already unconscious by then.” Kylo answered, smirking.

“Shame Mara was there.” Javiell said, “May have been able to finish him off otherwise.” Everyone made shocked noises, a few people also sounded amused. “What? I know at least Kylo and Rey are thinking the same thing.” Javiell said defensively.

The conversation moved on to explore the morality of kicking someone when they’re down, (even if they deserved it), or rather killing someone when they were vulnerable, (again, even if they deserved it).

Rey didn’t add her opinion. She was fairly certain people would know she’d be fine with it- so long as there was no possibility of being caught of course.

 

The cruel wind had dropped somewhat by the time they all left the refectory and started back to their dorm, and Rey felt her limbs start to itch. A clear night like this would be a good time to explore the buildings she hadn’t yet climbed.

_ <Mind if I go out climbing this evening for a bit? I can come over to your room afterwards?> _She sent to Kylo.

He frowned, his eyes darting briefly to her face before they flicked away, the grip he had on her hand tightened somewhat. _ <I don’t think it’s safe at the moment. Not till we have some answers regarding the fire and the… watchers.> _

Rey let out an irritated huff, forgetting they were meant to be circumspect when they communicated this way. No one seemed to notice though.

_ <I’ll be fine. If people are looking for me, I doubt it will be after lights out and on top of buildings.> _

A wave of disapproval came from him. _ <I’ll come with you then.> _

_ <No offense, Kylo, but you’ll slow me down. If I have any problems, we have the bond, you’ll know instantly.> _

_ <Yes, I can know instantly if you die. That wouldn’t stop it from happening though, would it?> _

Rey’s stubborn streak reared its head and she raised her chin slightly, squaring her shoulders. _ <I am going. I will be fine.> _

Kylo stopped walking and almost angrily pulled her to face him, “But _will you_ ? You can’t possibly know that!” She was surprised by the depth of feeling behind his words. “You shouldn’t be going _anywhere_ on your own at the moment. And certainly not in the dead of night, scrambling around rooftops.”

“I can take care of myself! I don’t need a bloody nurse maid!” She whispered heatedly.

Something dangerous glittered in his eyes, an infuriated hum crackled through the bond, but the warning came too late. Rey was just taking a step back when Kylo grabbed hold of her and lifted her up over his shoulder, then started moving quickly towards the dorm.

Rey squawked in indignation, he was gripping her legs tightly with one arm and his other hand was pressed firmly against her bottom, her legs immobile and her hips restricted.

“What the hell are you doing? Let me down right now!” She yelled. But what made her more angry, was that she wanted to laugh. There was a ridiculous sense of smugness surging through the bond. Kylo was very pleased with himself indeed, and she had to push down a giggle. “Put me down, _now,_ Kylo Ren!” His arms merely tightened. “Or I will make you!” She half yelled half laughed. _Damn him._

“I’d like to see you try.” He rumbled, a deep satisfaction colouring his words.

“Fine!” She half yelled, and started punching his kidneys. He grunted. “Little help, Zainmar?”

“That’s cheating!” Rey hissed. “So?” Kylo responded, _oh,_ when she got out of this he was in for a world of pain… Yet why couldn’t she stopped laughing? Even to her ears she was sounding disgustedly girly.

“Hi, Rey.” Zainmar said happily as he got hold of her arms at the elbow and pushed them together, angled outwards. “Why are we manhandling your girlfriend?” Leonmar said from somewhere to the side.

“She was going to go climbing roofs tonight. _On her own._ ” Kylo said darkly.

“But, Peanut, Kylo’s right, you can’t do that!” Was everyone still outside? “Don’t you dare take his side, Finn!” She yelled to wherever he was. “Kick him in the shins or something!”

She heard people laugh. “I love you, but there is no way I am kicking Kylo Ren in the shins. _And_ he is right this time.”

“ _Urhhh!_ It's a bloody conspiracy!” Rey scowled at Zainmar. “Don’t think I won’t get you back for this.” She told him, which, maddeningly only made him grin more.

“We need a diversion so I can get her up to my room.” Kylo said calmly. There were whistles and ‘Oooos’ made by their audience.

Rey’s shoulders were going numb. Zainmar may be amused but his grip was firm. “For fuck’s sake, just let me down and I won’t go out tonight.”

Kylo just snorted, “I know you too well to believe _that._ ”

Rey tried twisting to see if she could bite him but only got a mouthful of his coat.

“We could have her in our room tonight?” Jess offered helpfully, “then you wouldn’t need a diversion.”

“You too, Jess? I thought girls were meant to stick together!” Jess just laughed.

“I don’t think you could contain her, Jess. She’d probably just jump out your window as soon as you went to sleep.” Kylo said. He was enjoying this way too much… Maybe if she… _Hmmm._ A slow smile curved Rey’s lips.

“Shit, Kylo, she’s doing an evil smile!” Zainmar said. Rey was pleased to hear a little concern in his voice.

Kylo’s grip on her tightened even more, which should _not_ have been possible. “Face it. You're stuck.” He told her. She loved it when she proved him wrong.

She sent a burst of energy through the bond, into the muscles of his arms, a little like an electric shock, but rather than tightening his muscles the way electricity would, it loosened them.

She brought her head up, not hard, but not softly either, catching Zainmar’s chin and slithered out of Kylo’s arms as they both let go of her and she danced away from them, her limbs tingling. _ <Who’s cheating now?> _Kylo was already springing towards her and she had to make her legs work. She got into the common area just before he could catch her and staggered around to the far side of the biggest table in the room, she didn’t think she’d make it back up the stairs just yet, despite the adrenaline.

She gave Kylo a feral grin as he stalked towards her, people automatically moving out of his way. Everyone else came in behind him, the Knights immediately flanking him, Zainmar ruefully rubbing his chin. It sounded like Jess was taking bets. Did these kids think credits grew on trees? _ <You can’t pick me up in here, there are witnesses!> _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo just grinned at her, picking her up had been pure, exasperated impulse at first, but he was rather enjoying himself now. _ <I don’t care.> _And he blocked her, throwing up walls hoping that would mean it would be harder for her to use the bond like that again.

He gave a tiny nod and the Knights rushed her, she had nowhere to go. Well, _almost_ nowhere.

The little minx dived underneath the table, darting out the other side as the Knights scrambled to change direction.

To his amusement, Finn and Poe were blocking the door to the kitchen. _“Finn!”_ She said madly when he didn’t move out of her way, and then Kylo had her, wrapping his arms around her from behind, pinning her arms and tilting back so Leonmar could grab her kicking legs.

“Urhhhh!” She was trying to bend so she could bite his arm, when that didn’t work she tried throwing her head back, but he’d been expecting that and was leaning away from her. “If you don’t quiet down, I will put you to sleep.” He whispered in her ear. He felt her shiver slightly before she said, “ _You wouldn't!”_

“I would. Just a few seconds in a choke hold and you’d be out for the count.” She made a vexed sound and he grinned.

“There’s still no way you are getting me up to your room.” She told him, confidently.

Now the excitement had died down, people had gone back to their homework or conversations.

Kylo glanced up at Javiell and Zainmar, “Diversion? Games room would probably be best.”

Zainmar grinned and Javiell nodded, a small smile of amusement on his face, and they both disappeared.

“We’ll go give them a hand.” Finn said and he and Poe went after Zainmar and Javiell. “Traitor!” Rey yelled after him then huffed another rebellious sigh.

She relaxed slightly, as if she had given up fighting for a few moments, then strained against his hold on her, wriggling furiously… “ _Please_ . As if I’d fall for that one.” He whispered in her ear, again eliciting another shiver from her. _Fuck._ He was horny as hell.

_ <Would you like to know what I’m going to do to you when I get you upstairs?> _ He sent and she stilled in his arms, he felt a brief spike of desire from her before she was able to repress it.

He grinned, _ <I’m going to tie you up and punish you… by eating your pussy and making you come till you can’t anymore and you beg me to stop.> _ He felt her gasp in his arms. _ <But I won’t.> _He promised and felt heat rush through her body.

“Whatever you two are talking about,” Leonmar muttered, “Can it wait till you’re alone? This is getting weird.”

Kylo blushed slightly, he could feel Rey do the same, they had forgotten Leonmar was there.

_“Now,_ Kylo!” Ingalan whispered from the kitchen, and they started moving.

So did Rey. She was clearly not going to come quietly… Kylo chucked to himself at that thought, then shook himself, so he could focus on the task at hand.

It was awkward and difficult, but they managed to get Rey up three flights of stairs before Zainmar and Javiell ran up behind them.

“Thanks guys. Could one of you go up and lock my bedroom window? And I’m going to need the belts of the dressing gowns in the bathroom.”

Zainmar laughed delightedly and ran up, Javiell going with him. “Do you think that’s necessary?” Ingalan asked, then shook his head answering his own question. “I guess it is. You really know how to pick ‘em, Kylo.”

Rey made a furious sound. “Lock us in, would you?” Kylo said as they got to his room, glad he had got the locks and padlocks from Han.

“Sure. Shall I come open it around 5am?” Ingalan said and Kylo nodded as Javiell tied Rey’s wrists with a fluffy white cord before they let go of her and Kylo dumped her on his bed.

She immediately sprang back up, her tied hands only making her balance wobble a bit, but Kylo caught hold of her again. “Perfect… So, I’ll see you guys tomorrow. Thanks for the help.”

They quickly left and the sounds of the padlock being fastened came through the door.

Kylo let go, looking down at her smugly as she turned to face him, hair messed up and wild, cheeks flushed and expression heated with her ire.

“I can’t believe you just _did that!”_ She yelled and sprang at him. He let her, grabbing her tied hands and tackling her onto the bed.

They went from wrestling to kissing in seconds. It was hot and rough and utterly delicious.Desire roared through him as his hands touched any bare skin he could find.

She bit his lip, hard and he snaked a hand down to palm her between her legs. He tasted his blood as she jerked from his touch, a low whimper escaping her throat.

He could feel the heat of her through her jeans. He stood up, pulling her with him. She managed to get out, “What?-” Before he was undoing her boots and pulling them off her feet, steadying her as she unbalanced. Then he was tearing her jeans undone and pulling them unceremoniously down, dragging her underwear with them.

She gasped in surprise, before he pushed her backwards, pulled her knees apart and buried his face in her.

_She was wet._ So wet and so hot… And so, _sensitive,_ within moments she was mewling, her legs trembling as he pulled them over his shoulders.

He clamped down on her legs as she came, not stopping for her shudders, carrying on, _just like he’d promised her._

A little while later, he came up for air and to admire his handy work. He saw she had moved her wrists up and was biting the dressing gown belt in her teeth. His erection jumped at the sight.

She was still twitching. He let go of her left leg with his right hand, and gently slid a finger inside her. Her hips immediately bucked and his finger slipped all the way in as she gasped. He started moving it as he watched her, still gently, starting nice and slow.

She moaned as she lifted her head slightly to peer at him through heavy lidded eyes. He grinned at her, then slowly and deliberately lowered his mouth back between her legs, sucking her clit and licking her as he continued to move his finger.

“Oh, Kylo. _Shit!”_ It was beautiful to experience, he was almost carried away with her as she came, he had to concentrate very hard not to be. It was painful, but he managed it.

_ <Kylo, I can’t, I can’t!> _ Her voice in his mind was frayed at the edges. He just smiled, _ <Yes, you can. Remember what I promised. I’m not going to stop.> _

There were a few minutes where all she could do was gasp, then. _ <Please! I can’t… And you must need to… I could… take you in my mouth?> _

He very nearly came as shock skittered through him. He paused his mouth in its ministrations to look up at her. _“What?”_

“I could, ah! Take you in my, ah! Mouth.” He was still thrusting with his finger. “Are you sure?” He was aware his husky voice was rather strangled, but didn’t care.

She nodded, “Ah, _yes!_ ” His erection jumped, pushing against his jeans, pulsing as it did so. His cheeks flushed, his _whole body_ flushed. “If you’re sure… But, you just need to give me one more. I know you can do it. I want you to come for me Rey, _my little scavenger._ Just, once, _more.”_ He lowered his mouth to her again.

And she did, she shattered in his hands as she rode it out on his finger and in his mouth…

 

As she lay twitching in the aftermath, he stripped, then lay down on the bed with her, propped up on one elbow as he watched her in smug satisfaction, a job well done.

Every now and then he’d trail a finger lightly up her leg or over her waist where her t-shirt had rucked up from her writhing and she’d twitch all over again.

“You, are really, _really,_ mean, Kylo Ren.” She said finally, she attempted to sit up and he helped her. She glared at him, then slithered onto the floor and knelt as he sat forward on the bed.

He suddenly felt… shy? His brain was unable to function enough to think of a better word, as his erection jolted at her proximity.

“You don’t have to.” He got out, but she looked up at him, her lips were red and swollen, her eyes still heavy lidded but determined.  

“I know.” She answered and pulled his knees apart so she could settled between them.  He swallowed, and tried to calm himself enough to stop from coming as soon as he touched her lips.

“Ah!” He hissed as she wrapped one hand around the base. She smirked up at him, then lowered her eyes as she took him in. There was a flutter of nerves along the bond and then she lowered her mouth to him.

“Oh, _shit!_ ” He breathed as her lips touched him, her tongue flicked out of her mouth to lick his head and his hips jerked. She paused a moment, as if acquainting herself to the taste, and then she slowly slid his head into her mouth.

If he died now, he’d die happy. Her mouth was hot, her lips soft as they stretched around him. He’d never had a blow job, but he was fairly certain he was going to last less than a minute.

She paused when she had taken as much as she could, he could feel the back of her throat and it sent hot jolts shooting through his body. Then she started moving her tongue and he was gasping, fists clenched in his duvet as he watched her. She began to suck and move him up and down as she did. _ <Oh stars, you need to stop or I’ll come.> _ His brain was incapable of forming words. She didn’t stop, but she slowed right down, sucking more gently.

If this is what a blowjob felt like, what would it be like when they… _No, no._ If he thought about that he would lose the modicum of control he had.

He tried to even out his breathing but it was no good, he could feel his release building. He grabbed one of the spare dressing gown belts from the bed and balled it up, he may need it.

For now he bit his lip, clenched his fingers as he watched Rey work…

_ <Rey, I’m going to come, let go!> _ But she shook her head slightly and carried on, oh stars, was she going to let him come in her mouth? **Oh. Fucking. Hell**.

Just as he was on the brink, she ran her nails down his thigh and he plummeted over the edge as he came. _ <Rey!> _

She kept him in her mouth till he was finished, milking every last drop from him. Kylo wanted to carry on watching her but couldn’t help collapsing back on the bed, panting as if he had just run a mile, heart beating violently against his ribs.

He was vaguely aware of her moving about his room, before the bed dipped and she curled up next to him, hand idly stroking his chest over his heart.

After a moment, uncertainly filtered through the bond, “Was that okay? ...Did I do it right?”

He barked a laugh, “You’re kidding right? That was...“ He didn’t know how to describe it so he pulled her mouth to his, kissing her deeply, tasting himself on her tongue as it danced with his.

The bond sang between them, the power rising till sparks exploded in blinding golden light behind their eyes.

Kylo pulled Rey against and partly on top of him as they breathed together, blinking in the darkness as their eyes slowly readjusted.

“You still have your top on.” He said eventually, disapprovingly. She laughed, “Well you can blame that on yourself. My hands were tied. Literally.”

He chuckled, then stopped, “ _Hey!_ When did you get free?”

“Not telling.” She sang at him smugly. He wanted to flip them, but couldn’t trust his muscles just yet, so he settled for just kissing her again as she laughed.

 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

 

**_We touch and you're afraid of me_ ** ****_  
_ **_And we burn and now I'm at your feet_ ** ****_  
_ **_High speed, but you know you're in safe hands_ ** ****_  
_ **_Ooh, in the dark we make a brighter light_ ** ****_  
_ **_From one spark to the horizon wide_ ** **_  
_ ** ******_We trust, and together we tame the land._**

  **_Oh you'd be forgiven if you think you're dreaming_ ** ****_  
_ **_But we're working night and day to make a dream come true, yeah_ ** **_  
_ ** ******_Everything I do is driven by you_**

**_~Driven By You, by Queen_ **

 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Phew! Well, that was completely unplanned…. It kinda messes with the pacing but, hey, they just can’t seem to keep it in their pants.
> 
> I almost called this chapter, “Et tu, Brute?” … confused? When Rey says, You too? To Jess, that was all I could hear in my head, plus Poe and Finn were bad as well!
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta <3


	60. In The Dead Of Night

Rey awoke with a start. Kylo was still asleep next to her. She looked around trying to work out what had disturbed her, but could see nothing in the darkness.

She slipped out from Kylo’s arm and stood, pulling the curtain aside slightly so she could study the room.

Yet still, she could see nothing. But there was a hum of unease vibrating across her skin, her scalp prickled. She dipped into the bond and found Kylo was deeply asleep.

She chewed her lip as she thought, then hurriedly dressed and pulled some pins out of her jeans pocket.

She quietly manipulated the lock on the window and opened it, pausing to watch Kylo for a few seconds before she slipped out and up onto the roof.

She crouched down before she reached the apex, so she would be less visible, then carefully scanned her surroundings.

She couldn’t see anything unusual, but there was _something_ wrong, or rather, there was _someone_ , near or in the main school building. Someone who shouldn’t be there.

She could go and check it out, but if Kylo found out, he would lose his shit... But she couldn’t _ignore_ this. _Someone_ had taken her files, had almost killed two children with their diversion to do it… Was she being big headed? Could someone really be that interested in her? It seemed ridiculous, and yet, things did seem to be pointing towards that conclusion.

Rey sighed and climbed back down to Kylo’s room. She rested a hand on his shoulder and gently shook him, “Kylo? Kylo, you need to wake up.”

He murmured and shifted, still asleep as one arm reached out to pull her to him. It would have been sweet, but she didn’t have time. She pulled on their connection as she shook him more firmly. “Kylo!”

His eyes flew open, pupils wide in the dark, face confused and slightly irritated. “Kylo, get up. There is someone outside.”

That got him. He shot up, swayed slightly from the headrush, then went to the window to look out. “I don’t see anyone.” He said, voice still rough with sleep.

_“No_ , there is _someone_ in the school, _right now._ ”

He turned to look at her sharply, “How do you know? And how the fuck is the window open?”

Rey hissed in vexation, “That doesn’t matter right now. Get dressed!”

“You are not going anywhere, Rey!” He growled at her.

“Don’t be stupid. You will need me with you. And we need to see who is doing this. Don’t you want to _know?_ I can better protect myself if I know who it is! I promise, I won’t attack them. This is purely for reconnaissance.”

Kylo glared at her for a moment, then knocked on his bedroom wall, it was clearly some sort of code, he paused and repeated it until an answering knock responded. Then he repeated it on the other wall before hurriedly getting dressed. “I’ll go back to my room and get some weapons, then meet you outside.” Rey said as she turned to the window.

“No. If we run into any teachers you may be expelled, and as you said, this is _just_ reconnaissance.” Kylo said firmly as he blocked her path. Rey sighed but let it go, she already had one on her, it would have to do.

There were sounds of furtive movements and the door opened, revealing Ingalan and Zainmar, both dressed.

“Jav and Leonmar are dressing now.” Ingalan said softly as they came in. “What’s going on?”

Kylo glanced at Rey then looked back at Ingalan, “There is someone in or around the main school building. Someone who shouldn’t be there. So we’re going to sneak out, and do some reconnaissance.”

“Shouldn’t we just tell a teacher? Or call the police?” Ingalan asked reasonably.

Rey answered, “Teachers will use torches and shout, whoever it is will likely disappear before anyone gets a look at them or what they are doing. The police will take too long. Even this has taken too long... I could have been there by now.” She muttered that last to herself, Kylo gave her an angry look. “If we are doing this, if I _let_ you come with us, you will _stay_ with us, not hare off on your own, is that clear?”

Rey glared at him, but she wanted to go, so she just nodded stiffly. Kylo handed her a black hoodie, “Wear this, it is darker than your coat and slightly less bulky.”

Zainmar snorted as he tried to suppress his laughter once Rey had it on. The hoodie came down to mid thigh and she had to roll the sleeves back several times.

Javiell and Leonmar arrived and after quickly filling them in, they all crept downstairs. Rey could feel her adrenaline start to pump, could feel the tense excitement of the others permeate the air around them.

It had been 3.04 am when they left Kylo’s room, the light downstairs was low. _ <Kylo, let me go and check it’s empty, I can let you know this way, then there’s no noise.> _

_ <No, I will. Don’t forget you’re coming down the boy’s stairs. I’ll tell you if it’s safe.> _ Rey had forgotten that. _ <Okay.> _ She watched him signal the others, who stopped and he went down alone. She really should learn the way they communicated. She didn’t like not knowing things.

She could feel the pulse in her throat as she breathed carefully. _ <All clear.> _

Rey waved at the Knights and they descended the last of the stairs and moved swiftly through the lobby and kitchen into the common area before pausing at the door to outside.

Kylo was looking up at an alarm flashing next to the door. _ <This is new.> _ He told her, clearly unsure what to do.

Rey snorted softly and pushed him aside to get a good look at it. Really, for a school this wealthy they sure had basic kit. Rey pulled out the small knife in her boot and the pins out of her pocket. _ <What are you doing?> _ Rey just shushed him, waving her hand behind her as she set to work.

She opened up the box that held the electrics with her pins, then studied the wires before cutting one with her knife. The light blinked once, and then went out. She replaced the box and her knife then stood, pocketed the pins and pulled the door open gently and stepped outside.

Everyone remained silent until they got to the cover of the trees. “How did you do that?” Zainmar whispered as they paused.

“It doesn't matter right now.” Kylo said quietly. “I can sense them now too. We need to move… We’ll split into two groups.” He sounded unhappy about it but continued. “Rey with Zain and Ingalan, Jav and Leonmar with me. Both Rey and I can sense them and we can communicate over distance without any noise… Just, for light’s sake, _be careful._ We are here to observe, okay?”

Everyone nodded. Rey was pleased Kylo wasn’t letting his feelings get in the way of what made sense, and the trust that it implied.

“Rey’s group take the eastside, we’ll go west. Circle round the main building and we’ll meet behind the east buttress by the refectory, unless we find something. If you see anything, call me immediately and do not engage or make yourselves known… Should anything happen to Rey or myself, use whistles to alert the others. Fan out, but don’t lose sight of each other, and make sure you keep to the shadows.” Kylo turned to look at Rey, “This,” He held up his left fist at shoulder height, “Means stop. This,” He waved his fingers forward, “Means move. If you have spotted something or someone, do this,” He splayed his fingers out to the side, lower down at waist height. “And this,” He swept his hand out to the side, curving it up. “Means run. That should do for now. Let’s go.”

Rey took point, keeping low as she ran on silent feet towards the tennis courts, they were lucky, it was a new moon, though the stars were bright… The intruders may have chosen this night on purpose.

She was aware of Zainmar and Ingalan; strangely, she felt as if she could sense them, even if it had been pitch dark, she could have pointed to where they were. Were her and Kylo’s abilities still growing? _Enough._ Now was not the time.

The hum was growing, the vibrations of it making the hairs on her arms stand up, once they hit the path by the school they went faster, it was more hidden and dark in the shadows the building cast, and she knew the enemy wasn’t near enough to hear them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo had picked west on purpose. If whoever it was, was going for the reception and offices again, he should get there before Rey.

As they neared the fence that now surrounded the burnt hulk of the library he felt the hairs on his neck stand up and he held up his fist as he stopped, hidden in the shadows.

He pushed his senses out, questing. Whoever was out there, was definitely round the front of the main building.

He signalled the others and they moved on, more cautiously. Before they went around the corner, Kylo dropped to his knees and crawled so he could peer around it.

_There_ , he couldn’t see anyone, but he could feel them clearly. _ <Rey, there are people around the front, approach with caution, there is more than one.> _

_ <Okay. We’re almost to the corner now. Keep low and keep to cover.> _ He rolled his eyes, he wasn’t an idiot. _ <Do not engage them... Please, Rey.> _ A wave of warmth flooded the bond. _ <I promise.> _

His heart clenched for a moment at that, then he focused and made the sign for ‘trouble ahead’ and ‘stay low’.

They moved stealthily out sticking to the cover of the hedge that ran partly along the front of the school, they were about halfway to the main entrance when there was movement and they froze, sinking into the shadows as much as they could. _ <I can see them. Don’t move.> _ He sent to Rey as he watched, heart beating fast despite his measured breathing. Whoever it was, they were both fairly tall, dressed in dark clothing, their skin looked dark but not black. And they appeared to be having an argument… _ <I see them too.> _ Rey sent. _ <But not clearly enough to recognise them or hear what they are saying.> _

Kylo’s heart lurched. _ <Rey. Do not go any closer.> _ He sensed her irritation but was relieved when she sent. _ <Fine.> _

He thought quickly, one of them should try to get nearer. It should be him, but he was larger than either Leonmar and Javiell… But this was potentially dangerous.

He gave them the signal to stay, then crept along, till he was perhaps twenty feet away from the two men. The nearer he got, the more wrong their presence felt, buzzing across his skin. He could just pick out a few words from their whispers but didn’t recognise the language they spoke.

They both stopped abruptly and Kylo thought for one horrible moment they had heard him, then feared Rey may have disobeyed him and they’d heard _her_.

But they were both looking southwest, then they were quickly moving down the steps in that direction… He stayed where he was, barely breathing as he slowly turned his head, trying to find a gap in the hedge so he could see where they were going. But it was too dark.

There was the sound of motorbikes being started up much further down the drive. Kylo cautiously stood, looked about and motioned to Javiell and Leonmar to move up.

They all met at the front entrance. Rey didn’t say anything but moved quickly up the steps to examine the doors. “Does anyone have a torch?” She asked softly. Ingalan handed her a tiny one from his pocket. Kylo watched her as the others spoke in whispers about what they had seen.

Holding the torch in her mouth Rey was carefully going out the locks, glass panels and hinges.

She must have found something, because she paused to study something then took out the tiny knife she had in her boot, _where had that come from anyway?_ He didn’t remember it when he took her boots off earlier…

She came down the steps, frowning slightly and wiped the torch on her, no, _his_ , sleeve and gave it back to Ingalan.

“What did you find?” Zainmar asked her, expectation in his voice. She shook her head. “Not here.” She appeared… _agitated_. That couldn't be good. “Lets go to the trees the firepit is in. No talking till we get there.”

Her tension made the others look around. Kylo nodded, “As before. Keep to cover.” They moved off, ghosting like deeper shadows through the darkness. As he moved Kylo realised Rey had receded slightly, she’d half sunk into that cold void. Kylo really started to worry.

Once they’d reached the trees, they went in a little way then stopped. Everyone looked expectantly at Rey.

She was biting her lip. He wondered if she knew how much of a turn on that was. Probably not. After a few seconds, Kylo said, “What did you find?” She blinked and refocused her eyes.

“Not much.” She said and Kylo raised his eyebrows, but she carried on. “Whoever they are, they’re pros. I don’t think they were the same people that broke into the school on Monday. This was too well done... No one will know they were there. If we hadn’t seen them, I wouldn’t have known either.”

There was a silence as everyone digested this. “But what are the chances of two different groups breaking into the school?” Ingalan said.

Kylo studied Rey as she shook her head. “Not high… These two may have been the ones who set the fire, it was a very… _effective_ one which tallies more accurately with the skills they showed tonight.” He couldn’t work out why she was suddenly taking this so seriously. Unless it was just seeing the intruders in the flesh that had brought it home to her?

“What do we do now?” Leonmar asked. “We should go back to the dorm. Stold always gets up stupidly early to restock the feeders in the nature area…” He trailed off as something clicked into place.

“It was you!” His voice was louder than it should have been, he saw Rey’s face go blank as he stared at her, then surprisingly, she smiled. “Of course it was.” She answered simply.

The others looked at them in confusion. “What was who?” Javiell asked. Kylo didn’t know if he should answer that, but he hated keeping things from them. Rey saved him from his confliction.

“I put peanuts in Hux’s coffee.” She told them matter-of-factly. Javiell laughed. “ _Well shit_ .” Zainmar breathed. Kylo was still in shock, though he really should have known. _Of course_ it was her, who else would have the balls? Or rather, who else was crazy and had a grey area when it came to morality?

“Obviously, I’d rather you didn’t tell people.” She said and Kylo blinked. “Of course we won’t.” He told her, unsure why she even needed to say that. The Knights were looking shocked, apart from Javiell, but he knew they’d never tell.

Rey shrugged, “He spiked my drink, I spiked his… we really should be getting back.”

They started moving. “I may as well go up to my room,” She said softly to him as they walked furtively towards the dorm. “There isn’t much of the night left anyway.”

Kylo frowned, he needed to talk to her, but more than that he very much wanted to hold her. _ <I want to stay with you. But we can go to your room if you prefer?> _

She glanced up at him and her face softened. _ <Okay, but I can come to your room.> _ She was out of the cold place now and he lifted a few stray thoughts out of her head, without meaning to. She didn’t like sleeping on a mattress but was too embarrassed to say, he hid a smile. _ <No, that’s okay, I’ll come to yours.> _

Up ahead of them Ingalan held up a fist and they all stopped, then moved into the deeper shadows. “I can see someone in the kitchen window.” Ingalan told them softly. _Shit._

“What should we do?” Zainmar asked. Kylo paused as he thought. “You guys any good at climbing?” Rey asked. “I go up the drain pipe that’s near my window.”

Kylo looked at the others. “Does anyone have their window open?”

“Mine is.” Leonmar said. “So is yours, Kylo, we didn’t close it completely.” Rey added.

“Okay, so two of you go up via Leonmar’s and two up mine, I’ll go up Rey’s with her.” Kylo said and they nodded somewhat doubtfully. Rey smiled, “Lighter person goes up first. It’s an easy climb… if you want, you can watch me climb before trying it yourselves?”

Javiell snorted softly and Ingalan smiled. “We’ve seen you climb before. If climb is the right word for it.” Kylo smirked at that and Rey shot him a confused look, he shrugged. “Watching you climb is more like watching someone running vertically.” Zainmar laughed.

Rey huffed and crossed her arms, but Kylo could tell she was a little pleased. “Time we went. Stold will be out soon.” He said and the others nodded. “I’ll see you guys later.”

They moved off, crouching low, out of sight of the dorm’s ground floor windows. Rey was right, the climb was easy, it was only a few minutes before he was closing her window and pulling her into his arms as he breathed in the scent of her hair.

After undressing and getting into her nest, Kylo propped himself up on his arm so he could look at her face. “Why didn’t you tell me about Hux?”

Rey looked at him and sighed, “If I had, would you have let me do it?” Kylo frowned at her, then sighed himself, “Probably not, no.”

She nodded her head, “Then you have your answer… I guess it doesn’t really matter though, I think we’d know by now if he were dead.”

Her tone was rather disappointed. Kylo thought back to the file he’d read on her, then thought about what Hux had almost done to her last Saturday… He didn’t care, he realised. Perhaps he should, but he had almost killed Hux himself that night, granted, it hadn’t been premeditated, but it still meant something.

He pulled her against him, wrapping her in his arms as he said softly, “I love you. I always will.”

The tension left her body, almost as if she had been afraid of his reaction. He closed his eyes as he breathed her in again.

He hadn’t realised he had fallen asleep until Rey kissed him awake, the sky was turning pale. He sighed resignedly and got dressed. “Shall I meet you downstairs in half an hour?” He asked.

She smiled up at him, “You don't have to you know. I honestly don’t mind if you want to sleep longer.”

He was tempted, but at the moment he didn’t want her to be on her own, not while the intruder problem was sorted out, so he shook his head. “No, I’ll come down after a shower.” He said before kissing her and climbing out of the window and onto the roof.

The cold air made him shiver beneath his hoodie and he was glad to get into his room and shut the window. He needed a scalding hot shower followed by a large mug of coffee.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥
> 
>  
> 
> Songs:
> 
> ~In The Middle Of The Night by Within Temptation  
> ~It's The Fear by Within Temptation  
> ~This Is The Hunt by Ruelle  
> ~Losing Control by Aviators  
> ~In the Shadows by The Rasmus


	61. Red Sky In The Morning

 

After a hot shower, Rey dressed and went downstairs. While her tea brewed, she looked out of the kitchen window at the morning sky painted red by the sunrise.

She felt foolish. Unable to pinpoint exactly why she had suddenly felt so unhinged last night. She was feeling normal again this morning, grounded. “Hey, Rey!” Poe said as he came into the kitchen.

Rey turned away from the sunrise. “Hi.” She smiled at him as she finished making her tea, watching as Poe fed BB8 who was chirruping like mad.

“So, you sleep well?” Poe asked as he poured himself coffee, with a distinctly suggestive emphasis and Rey’s cheeks burned as she remembered what had happened last night before their night time adventures.

She narrowed her eyes at Poe as he laughed. “I will get you for that! You and Finn!” He just laughed harder.

She huffed in disgust at him then took her tea into the reading room, willing the colour in her cheeks to disappeared. _Shine a light_ , but so many people had seen Kylo manhandle her.

She smiled to herself as she remembered it was MMA today. She would make him suffer for it.

Rey looked up at the door to the reading room as she felt Kylo get nearer. He came in, warm skinned from his shower but still sleepy eyed, carefully carrying a huge mug of coffee.

He sat down next to her on the sofa and sighed happily as he took a sip of coffee. Rey couldn’t help her face softening as she looked at him. “Perhaps tonight, we just sleep?”

Kylo sighed again but then nodded. “That may be best, sorry.” Rey laughed, cuddling up to him, feeling the warmth radiate off him. “What should we do about last night.” He asked softly after a quick glance at the door to check no one else could hear.

Rey felt her eyebrows rise, “What do you mean?” He turned so he could look at her face properly. “I think we should tell someone, Luke at the very least.” Rey frowned as she considered his words. “And say what exactly? That we snuck out, watched two mysterious men have a chat on the entrance steps, then disappear and ride away on what sounded like motorbikes? It’s a bit vague and will definitely get us in trouble. I can almost guarantee that they will find no evidence of a break in and there will be nothing missing. This was no smash and grab.”

Kylo shifted next to her, “But it was more than that wasn’t it? You’re forgetting what we _felt_ , that they woke you up just by _being_ there. Luke knows about our abilities. He knows that they mean something.”

Rey took a mouthful of tea as she thought. “And how do we explain what I was doing in your room?”

“We don’t. You were in yours and you woke me up by speaking in my head.” Kylo said quickly. Damn. That was a reasonable answer, he must have been thinking about this.

Rey shrugged. “If you really want that shit storm, tell him. Though perhaps leave your Knights out of it, there’s no point in us all getting bollocked for this.”

Kylo sat quietly as he thought. Rey finished her tea then stood. “I’m going to walk over to the workshop before breakfast, I need to fix the door alarm before anyone notices it’s been tampered with.”

“Well if we tell Luke, he can get it fixed.” Kylo suggested. Rey rolled her eyes, “And add property damage to our list of crimes? I can take care of it easily. We can just say we went down the drain pipes.”

Before he could answer Poe came in, BB8 dancing around his feet and Jess, Kenjad and Maritan bouncing along behind him.

“Rey-Rey!” Kenjad squealed. Rey winced slightly. “You sleep well?” Jess asked with a grin and the girls erupted in giggles. Rey willed the colour to stay out of her cheeks.

Maritan pulled herself together first. “Hey, sorry Rey-Rey. Couldn't help it.” She said smiling, and Rey found herself returning it.

She sat back down as the others found themselves seats. “So, it’s the All Hallows Eve Dance on Saturday. We’re going to get our nails done in the early afternoon, would you like to join us?”

Rey blinked, “Get your nails done how?” Kenjad started giggling again. Maritan smiled, “Get a  manicure, like they tidy up your nails and then they paint them. We usually get gel as they last longer and are super shiny.”

Rey was aware of Kylo smirking into his coffee cup. “I think my nails are happy as they are.” Rey said carefully, hoping that wouldn’t offend them.

“But are you sure? You could get them done to match your dress!” Kenjad said, all wide eyed and pleading.

Rey felt Kylo jerk his head up to look at her. “You’re… You’re going to wear a dress?” He sounded almost nervous. How odd.

Rey looked at him and shrugged. “Yeah. I got it when we went shopping last week.”

_ <Maybe we should tell Luke on Sunday.> _ Kylo sent. Rey carefully did not look at him as Kenjad gushed about how beautiful the dress was without giving any details away. _ <Why?> _

_ <There’s always the possibility we’ll be punished, and that may mean we miss the dance… I don’t want to miss the opportunity to see you in a dress.> _

Rey crossed her arms. _ <You’re an idiot.> _ She told him affectionately. There was a definite tinge of smugness in his retort, _ <I don’t care.> _

Finn entered the reading room, yawning hugely, a mug of coffee in hand and the conversation turned to who was going with who to the dance. Rey shifted in her seat, beginning to feel nervous. She’d never been to a dance, and wasn’t even sure how they worked. Kylo’s hand laced itself with hers, warm and comforting. _ <Could you put in a good word to Jess about Ingalan? He really likes her.> _ Rey sent back. _ <I’ll try.> _

 

Once everyone else had got downstairs they all went to get breakfast, as Rey looked at her lessons for today she groaned to herself. She and Finn had Personal and Social Development before lunch.

“What was the subject for P.S.D. last week, Finn?” She asked, hoping fervently that they had passed on from the subject of ‘Families’.

Finn grimaced at her as he finished his second mug of coffee. “We’re still on Families I’m afraid.” Rey groaned again in response and let her forehead hit the table. “Kill me. Just kill me now.”

“It can’t be that bad.” Leonmar said and Rey lifted her head to glare at him, mirroring Finn. “Talking about families is probably awkward when you’re a, a...” Kylo trailed off in his answer, obviously struggling to find a word he didn’t think Rey and Finn would be insulted by.

“Kylo, you can say orphan you know. It’s not a dirty word.” Finn told him flatly, his expression making his statement questionable. “Oh.” Leonmar said, suddenly looking awkward. Rey snorted, “Exactly.”

Kylo’s warm hand came up to rub her back and she rested her head against his arm, drawing comfort from his touch. She was grateful he tried telling her it would _only_ be one lesson…

 

All too soon Rey and Finn were slinking into Leia’s classroom, shoulders already hunched as they sat in silence, ignoring the chatter of the other students as they waited for the lesson to start.

Leia soon called the class to quiet. “Marriage has significantly changed in its dynamic more in the last thirty years than in the previous thousand. Today, we will be looking at what those changes are, and what we think the change was driven by. I’d like you to partner up with a member of the opposite gender please. You should work around these three points, gender, religion and economics, and what roles they have taken in the recent changes.”

Rey and Finn looked at each other. “Well, this could be worse.” Rey said and Finn nodded. “Yeah… but do you know anything about marriage?”

Rey snorted. “No. But probably more than I do about having a family.” Finn chuckled as he nodded. “Good point.”

 

The lesson turned out to not be too bad, some of it was even interesting and when she and Finn walked to the refectory for lunch, there was a slight spring in Rey’s step.

When they entered the refectory there was a buzz of excited conversation. It didn’t take long to find the cause of it. Hux was sitting at a table with his lackeys. Quite alive, and though pale, he looked absolutely fucking fine.

Rey’s good humour diminished somewhat as she looked at him. “Try not to look so disappointed, Peanut.” Finn whispered to her and pulled her over to where the trays were kept. Rey sighed and got her lunch. “Aren’t you?” She murmured to him as they poured themselves juice. She glanced back at where Hux had been sitting but he had disappeared.

“Of course. But, let’s not antagonise him, huh? I know we have friends and stuff, but let's just try to coexist without any drama for just a few days.”

“I don’t know why you looked at me when you said that, I hate drama.” Rey said defensively. Finn laughed, “Sure, Rey. You are totally drama free.” He said facetiously. Rey threw a grape at him, but he just caught if deftly in his mouth and grinned. “Face it, you may not look for drama, but almost every day since you’ve been here, there has been some sort of drama.”

Rey thought back over the last eighteen days, frowning as they sat and started to eat. Finn was right. “Fine. Today, there will be no drama. Or tomorrow. Or the next day. Most of it was caused by Hux or Kylo anyway. Kylo isn’t an issue now and hopefully Hux’s nose still hurts enough to remind him to leave me alone.”

Finn smirked. “What about last night with Kylo? That counted as drama to a certain extent. It was certainly entertaining.” Rey narrowed her eyes at him. “ _Indeed._ That reminds me, I still owe you for that act of treachery.”

“What’s this?” Zainmar asked as Kylo and the Knights sat down, closely followed by Poe and everyone else.

Rey rolled her eyes at him. “She’s still pissed about last night.” Finn said and all the boys laughed. Rey tried to look as dignified as she could.

“Hey, you can laugh all you want _boys,_ ” Jess said smirking, “It still took most of you to get it done. Against a girl, half your size.” Rey looked as modest as she could while the three girls laughed.

“Yeah, but my Peanut is superhuman, so that doesn’t count.” Finn insisted. Rey rolled her eyes again, then turned to Kylo, who was smirking next to her. He stopped when he realised she could see and made an innocent face. “So P.S.D. wasn’t so bad then?”

“It was okay. I just don’t see the point in it.” Rey said as she finished her juice. Kylo shrugged, “I don’t think many people can.”

“People wanna play frisbee after we’ve eaten?” Poe asked the table at large. “It’s actually sunny at the moment but I think it’s going to rain later.”

The idea of playing something where no one could win seemed to perplex Kylo and the Knights, which greatly amused Rey, though she also agreed with them slightly.

The group split into two, some remaining in the refectory while the others went outside. “You’re going too?” Kylo asked Rey in surprise when she got up. “Yeah, I’ll see you for MMA?” _ <Seems like a good time to ask Jess about Ingalan.> _ Kylo gave her a small smile and stood. “Sure. See you later then.” He said before giving her a very thorough kiss. _ <Thanks... I don’t know if you’ve seen, but Hux is back. It may be best to avoid him.> _ Rey gave him a flat look then followed the others outside.

“Hey, Jess,” She said as she caught up with the girls. “Are you going to the dance with anyone specific?” The girls all looked at her with interest, “Why, do you know something?” Jess asked. Rey shrugged, unsure what that meant. “Apparently Ingalan likes you.” They all made considering noises. “That’s the extra tall one, right?” Jess asked. Rey nodded, now she thought about it, yes, Ingalan was the tallest one of the Knights, slightly taller than Kylo, but Kylo’s sheer presence made it unnoticeable.

“Hmmm.” Jess said. “He looks nice but he’s kind of quiet.” Kenjad said. They sat down on their coats while the others played frisbee, and discussed the merits of various boys. Rey listened with half an ear, just enjoying the sunlight on her face, even if it was weak. She was sitting with her face to the sun, eyes closed, until she heard the drum of paws and opened her eyes in time to see Chewie barreling towards her. The other girls scrambled quickly away as Chewie flung himself onto Rey, knocking her back in his enthusiasm. She couldn't help laughing. “Hey, Chewie.” Rey greeted him as he lovingly tried to lick her face. Once he had settled and she could sit up, she waved the girls back over. “He won’t bite.” She told them as they hesitantly came over.

To Rey’s surprise, it was Maritan that was the first to sit down and touch his head. Chewie made a happy groan and the others joined them. Exclaiming in surprise about how soft his head and ears were.

When the bell rang at the end of lunch, Rey was fairly relaxed as she and Finn made their way to the gym.

She was first up to the studio again. Luke smiled at her as she entered. “Good afternoon, Rey. You’re early. I’m just popping out to get something, why don't you begin to stretch.”

Rey smiled and nodded as he left. Then looked at all the empty space, she peered out the glass panel in the door and could see no one coming up the stairs yet.

She did some quick stretching, checked the glass again, then threw herself into a line of front flips. She’d just bounced out of the last one when the Knights entered the studio.

Kylo looked at her curiously as he walked towards her. “What were you just doing? I felt a surge of excitement.”

Rey shrugged. “Just warming up.” She ignored his disbelieving look and sank down into the splits, when her legs were flush against the floor she stretched her arms, enjoying the burn.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

_Red sky at night, shepherds' delight;_ _  
_ _Red sky in the morning, shepherds' warning._

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s short and just filler.
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	62. The Gathering Storm

Rey was deep in the cold place by the time Luke called the class to order once everyone had had time to warm up. “Okay, we saw some improvement last week on your takedowns but there is still a lot of room for improvement. So we will carry on with that. As before, four pairs at a time, and while you rest be sure to  _ observe. _ Being able to read your opponent's body and predict what they will do next is key to winning; not everything is about brute strength or even superior skill. And please remember that you are  _ not _ here to hurt your classmates.”

Rey flexed her wrists as she looked around at people getting into pairs, she had partnered first with Ismasta last time, and wasn’t sure who to ask now.

Luke came over and signalled to Kylo. “I’d like you two to partner up first, if that won’t be a problem?” Rey felt her cheeks try to heat but successfully pushed it away and shrugged.

Kylo merely nodded. “Good. To be honest, I think the rest of the class will learn more from watching you than actually sparring with you. Kylo didn’t lose once last week and the week before neither of you lost and drew against each other.” Luke said.

Rey felt a tiny bit disappointed to not have the chance to fight the others in the class but nodded. Kylo smirked. Luke lowered his voice. “And you must remember not to use any of your...  _ particular advantages _ during this lesson. Is that clear?” Rey and Kylo exchanged a look then both nodded. “Good. Take the far left corner, start now. Take breaks so the others don’t miss out, I may put you with other students later on if I think they’ve improved enough.”

Luke moved off and Rey and Kylo looked at each other before walking over to the mat in the corner. Rey resolutely sunk deeper into the cold place to protect herself from the effects Kylo often had on her body and mind, muting their bond. He was just another opponent. And he definitely had the advantage here; she knew her style of fighting was limited in lessons like this; there were too many rules.  

When Luke called out for the first four pairs to start, Rey rushed Kylo grabbing his chest with her arm under his and pivoting just before she hit his body so her back was to him, pulling him off balance as she moved her right leg to the outside of his and kicked up, twisting her hips as she did so she threw him over her hip and back. He landed on the mat with a thump. Somewhere behind her she heard Zainmar start laughing. 

Kylo was up before she could pin him, anger flickering in his eyes and she felt her adrenaline spike in her veins in response.

This time  _ he _ rushed  _ her _ , bowing low as he brought his shoulder into her waist, the impact making her lean forward. He grabbed her behind the knees and lifted her before twisting and dumping her down back first on the mat. He still had hold of her legs behind the knees and he leaned his shoulder into her stomach, pressing her body against the mat and keeping one of his knees underneath her legs. Rey tried to get hold of his neck for a choke hold but he was still pressed too tightly against her chest to lock on. She twisted her body around in an arch, curling her knees tighter into his body rather than fighting to get them away as she used them to press into his ribs, attempting to crush him between her knees and her arms. It didn’t work very well but it did move him slightly, and she was able to shift him enough that he was forced to change his grip on her. He moved into a mount hold and there was no space to get her elbow between his knee and her body so she shifted her hips and swung her legs up, moving them underneath his armpits and hooking her ankles across his chest as she exerted as much pressure as she could trying to pull him backwards.

“How the hell are you doing that?” He asked incredulously as he stared down at her feet.

Rey didn’t bother replying. Instead she took advantage of his distraction and changed the direction her legs were trying to pull him to a sideways movement and his body started to topple sideways, so he had to use his arms and shift his hips. She slithered out from under him, bouncing to her feet a few paces away as he stood too.

_ “Fast.” _ Rey and Kylo both looked up to find Luke watching them. “Rey… Where did you learn that move you pulled in the mount?” 

Rey shrugged, “Nowhere really.” Luke looked at her thoughtfully, “I’ve never seen anything like it, but it is rare for my students to be that flexible… Take a break and try and concentrate on just getting each other on the floor next time, don’t worry about locking each other down for now.”

Luke walked over to another mat and Kylo and Rey moved away to stand by the wall.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was working very hard to keep a lid on his desire. It had at least helped that Rey’s first move had made the beast rattle the bars of its cage.

They didn’t talk as they watched the other bouts, she was off in that cold void and he was working through possible moves in his head. 

As they faced each other again he noticed she was frowning to herself. But he didn’t allow himself to wonder why right now, he could ask her later.

The balance was shifted in his favour with Luke’s instruction to just concentrate on flooring each other. Their bouts didn’t last more than a few minutes after that and he got the better of her quite a bit.

About halfway through the lesson Luke instructed he and Rey to split up and spar with the Knights and a few others Luke deemed suitably ready. Again, neither of them lost, though he had to acknowledge it had become more of a challenge. 

 

As they warmed down Kylo noticed she was frowning still. “Are you okay?” He asked quietly as they started to leave the studio.

Before she could answer Luke called Rey back, Kylo paused too, along with the Knights. Luke shot them an amused look, “I just want to speak with Rey. Hit the showers, boys.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  


“Rey, I seem to remember you saying you did archery?” Luke asked her as Kylo and the Knights left the room. Rey nodded, trying to ignore the tension and pain in her head that had been slowly getting worse as the lesson progressed.

“I’ll be taking an archery group after school on Thursdays, if you’d like to come along? Just an hour and it will be weather depending. I was going to start it this evening but I think the weather is set to change. But is that something you would be interested in?”

Rey smiled, “That sounds good. Though the bows I used were basic and handmade.”  

Luke nodded, “We’ll see how you do with ours. I have several different types so you should be able to find one you like. It will be a mixed bunch of students and fairly relaxed. Okay, that’s it for now, go get changed.”

Rey nodded, smiled again and went downstairs to the changing rooms. She allowed the hot water of the shower to pound her skull, it eased the tension a bit. But as she left the changing room she could feel pressure in the air. There must be a storm due. In the desert a headache like this would lead her to take cover and hunker down somewhere safe while the sand filled wind scoured the world outside.

Finn and the Knights were waiting for her in the lobby and they started to walk towards the dorm. “What did Luke want?” Kylo asked her as he took her hand. “What? Oh, he’s starting an after school archery group and invited me to join.” She answered distractedly as she studied the sky. There were dense black clouds closing in, muting the sunlight. A wind started gusting, rippling about as if it couldn’t decide which direction it wanted to blow in.

“Are you okay?” Kylo’s voice sounded concerned, she looked up at his face. “Sorry, yeah. I’ve got a headache, that’s all.”

A flash of sheet lightning split the sky in the west, Rey flinched and picked up her pace, almost dragging Kylo behind her until he matched her pace. “Rey?” He squeezed her hand and she realised he must feel the small bubble of panic welling up inside her.

She didn’t know how a storm behaved somewhere like here, but she didn’t want to be outside when she found out. She pointed upwards as another light flashed in the sky this time shortly followed by thunder. Rey felt the hair on her arms and neck prickle. “We need to get inside.” She told Kylo.

For some reason he started laughing and she stopped, surprised by his reaction. “I can’t believe you’re afraid of a little lightning!” He said. Rey frowned at him, then glanced up at the sky, let go of his hand and jogged the rest of the way to the dorm on her own.

She breathed a small sigh of relief when she got inside. Kylo and the others caught up with her as she had a drink of water looking out of the window in the kitchen.

“Are you seriously afraid of lightning, Peanut?” Finn asked her, grinning. Rey glared at Kylo and everyone else who seemed to think storms were funny.

“You ever seen a desert storm? I’ve seen the corpses they leave behind. I don’t know what your storms are like here, but I’m going to find out from  _ inside. _ ”  _ Fuck, _ her head was hurting. She pushed past them, suddenly in a thoroughly shitty mood and went upstairs to change her clothes. She dressed in all black to suit her mood. Despite just having had MMA she felt restless. But looking out of her window showed her that it had just started to pelt with rain and she didn’t fancy going back to the gym anyway.

Her room was too small to do any sort of kata and obviously too small to practice with her staff… however, her makeshift staff could use some refinements.

She sat down in her chair, removed a knife from underneath the desk and used it to streamline the branch more perfectly.

The work was somewhat meditative and having a blade in her hand had always calmed her. There was a knock on her door and Jess stuck her head in before Rey could answer.

“Shit Rey, what are you doing?” Jess’s wide eyes were on the knife in Rey’s hand.  _ Why hadn’t she locked her bloody door? _

“I’m modifying my staff… You won’t tell about the knife will you?” She couldn’t keep a thread of anxiety out of her voice at the last.

Jess shook her head slowly then looked up at Rey’s face. “No. But, like, be careful. It looks  _ sharp _ … Anyway, Kylo sent me up, he seemed quite concerned?”

Rey hadn’t realised till then that she’d blocked Kylo, she sighed. “I’m fine. Just have a really bad headache and feeling kind of antsy.”

“Aww no! Come see Mara with me, she’ll give you some pain killers. Headaches are the worst! It’s nearly dinner time so you should come down anyway. Plus Kylo can’t seem to sit still. It’s kind of adorable.”

Rey couldn’t help smiling slightly at that. “Okay, give me a moment to tidy up here and I’ll be down.” She said as she stood and started brushing the bark slivers off her jeans.

“Cool. See you soon.” Jess said and went back out. Rey waited for a few seconds before taping her knife back under the desk; she still needed to find a more secure hiding place for her weapons. Leia would have a field day if Mara found Rey’s stash.

She chucked the mess she’d made out of the window, stowed her staff, squared her shoulders and went downstairs. 

Jess was chatting to Mara by the desk and Rey paused before looking for Kylo. Mara smiled at her, “Jess says you have a headache?” Rey nodded, flinching slightly as more thunder cracked overhead. “Alright dear. Here, go and take these with a glass of water. If it isn’t gone in four hours, come back and I can give you two more, okay?” Mara dropped two tablets into Rey’s palm. “Thank you.” Rey said gratefully and Mara nodded. “That’s okay dear, off you go and take them now.” 

Rey obediently went into the kitchen and took the tablets with water, she had luckily just placed the glass back on the worktop when Kylo spoke behind her, making her jump.  _ Light, _ she was twitchy. “Are you mad at me?” He asked and she turned to face him, feeling a little guilty. “Not really… I’m sorry. I didn’t actually mean to block you…” She trailed off and let her walls down.

As they connected again he pulled her into her arms, capturing her lips. His kiss was almost angry and she matched it as the storm raged outside.

Someone cleared their throat behind them and they broke the kiss, though Kylo still held onto her tightly as he turned, taking her with him.

“Time for dinner?” Ingalan asked blandly. Rey pushed a blush away. Kylo just nodded and looked back down at Rey. “Will you be okay going outside?”

Rey straightened her spine. It seemed storms here weren’t as dangerous as she was accustomed to. “I’ll be fine.” She told him flatly, but she knew he felt her flinch at another roll of thunder. He didn’t say anything though, just tightened his grip on her and nodded.

She pushed herself away a little, “I just need to grab a coat.” He nodded again and released her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The group all broke apart and ran to the refectory, though Kylo stayed close to Rey. Outwardly she appeared calm, save for her wide eyes and minute flinches. But he could feel her fear through the bond. 

He’d always enjoyed storms, the sheer elemental power in them resonated within him. The violent, destructive energy of nature charged his blood. He was surprised Rey didn’t feel the same. Though if the storms she was accustomed to left  _ corpses _ behind, he supposed her fear made sense.

Everyone was wet and dishevelled as they sat down to dinner and Rey was pale beneath her tan.  _ <We won’t be able to spend tonight together.> _ She sent as she picked at her food.  _ <We’ll work something out.> _ Kylo sent back. He didn’t like to think of her sleeping alone tonight. She started to shake her head but stopped as she remembered where they were.  _ <There is no way either of us are going over the roof in this.> _ She told him stubbornly. Kylo let it go for now, trying to think of a solution on his own. They had no way of knowing how long the storm would last, the forecast had been vague and even if one of them snuck up the stairs, if it was still stormy in the morning they’d have to sneak down again and the chances of them being caught increased. 

“We booked the movie room this evening.” Poe said, gaining Kylo’s attention. Rey looked up from her plate too. “If you guys want to join us. Not sure what we’re going to watch yet, but it’ll probably have to be something loud if we want to hear it over the storm.”

Kylo looked at the other Knights, who shrugged. “May do.” Kylo answered Poe. “Depends what you’re watching, we’re not really romcom material.” Most people laughed at that. He could feel Rey’s restlessness and tension through the bond and wondered if a violent movie would help her or make her worse.

 

As they queued to leave the refectory (people were taking their time wrapping up before running out into the storm) Hux entered with his lackeys bunched tightly around him.

Rey didn’t notice Hux’s arrival as Finn was adjusting her hood so it wouldn’t blow off as soon as they left the refectory. Kylo watched Hux carefully as he walked slowly past them, a flicker of fear crossed Hux’s face as he looked at Rey, but it was replaced by what Kylo could only describe as  _ hunger.  _ Then that too was gone, replaced by a sneer as Hux looked at Kylo. Kylo curled his lip in response. Then Hux was past them and the moment was gone.

 

The movie was a compromise, an action comedy rather than something truly violent. Kylo didn’t particularly care, he’d sat in an armchair and had pulled Rey onto his lap.

She had protested and tried to wriggle off at first, but he’d held onto her firmly, trapping her wrists in one hand as he wrapped his other around her waist, pulling her against him and planting kisses on any part of her face or neck her could reach.  _ <If you stop all the kissing I will stay!> _ She had promised after he made her a little breathless. He had acquiesced smugly and she now sat curled against him, head resting on his shoulder as she watched the movie.

He watched her rather than the screen, committing to memory this moment of stillness, and how easy and right it felt for them to be this close and relaxed with each other.

He sighed inwardly as he realised he wouldn’t be able to come up with a way to sleep with her tonight. She was right, going over the roof in this high a wind would be foolish. It was a shame Chewie wasn’t around to keep her company, he at least, would be allowed upstairs.

His thoughts drifted until he remembered that look on Hux’s face. Had that flicker of fear been due to the broken nose Rey had given him? Or did Hux suspect his allergy had been triggered by something she had done. And that  _ other look, _ that  _ hungry _ look… he carefully hid his thoughts from her as he considered Hux’s expression. Did it signify an appetite for revenge, or did Hux still see Rey as a conquest? Whatever it meant, Kylo would have to continue to keep a close eye on him. He suppressed a growl and tightened his arms around Rey, pressing his lips to her hair as he inhaled her scent.  _ Mine. _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey’s head was still hurting when the movie finished; if she was going to sleep tonight, and that wasn’t likely anyway, she needed to take the edge of the pain in her head. “I’m just going to get some water and more painkillers from Mara.” She murmured to Kylo so he’d let her off his lap. “I’ll be back in a moment.” He let her go reluctantly and she left everyone discussing the movie.

Mara frowned and insisted on feeling Rey’s forehead before letting her have anymore tablets. “Well, you’re warm but I don’t think it’s a temperature.” Rey felt her cheeks colour - sitting on Kylo’s lap had been like being next to a fire. “It’s just a storm headache, Mara. I promise.” She answered. Mara nodded understandingly and gave Rey the tablets.

She had just swallowed them and was filling another glass of water to take back with her when Hux spoke behind her. “It was you, wasn’t it.”

Rey turned, keeping her face as blank as possible as she looked at him. Lightning reflected in his eyes from outside. It was a statement, but Rey replied anyway. “What was?”

He moved closer to her and she steadily held his gaze, his lip curled slightly in a sneering smile. “You know what.” Rey tilted her head, allowed herself a tiny smile, but said nothing. “You could have killed me, you know?” He made a frustrated noise when she continued to stay silent. He was just a pace away from her now, leaning over slightly so he could stare into her eyes. For some reason, Rey always forgot how tall he was, just a few inches shorter than Kylo. “I’d step out of my personal space, if I were you.” She said softly.

And he did, well slightly anyway. “I hear Ren carried you up to his room last night.” He said, soft tone matching hers.  _ Shit! _ She wasn’t sure how to respond to that. He smiled and reached out a hand to her cheek before stopping to hover an inch away from actually touching her skin.

Rey brought up her own and batted his away. “Either you walk away now, or I re-break your nose.” He dropped his hand to his side but didn’t otherwise move. “I’d be careful about sneaking around, if I were you. There’s always someone watching.” If that was a threat, it was rather vague. Rey shrugged, “Thanks. I’ll be sure to keep that in mind.”

His lips thinned slightly and he turned to go, he was almost at the door to the common area when he turned back briefly, “I look forward to seeing you at the dance on Saturday.” Rey didn’t reply. She was going to have to ask someone what exactly went on at dances. 

Kylo strode into the kitchen just as she was about to leave to go back to the movie room. “Are you alright? I saw Hux.”

Rey took his hand in hers, “Really? You should know by now that I can handle him. I’m fine.” Kylo glared down at her and she couldn’t help smiling. “Seriously. I am fine.”

His glare softened somewhat and he pulled her into his arms. “You shouldn’t have to handle him.” He muttered into her hair. Rey wrapped her arms around him and rested her head against his heart, then sighed.  _ <I’m going to miss you tonight.> _ His grip on her tightened.  _ <Me too. But I don’t think there’s anyway around it. Unless you ask Jess to stay in her room?> _ Rey shook her head slightly,  _ <No. You, Chewie or Finn I could sleep with, I don’t think I’d manage with anyone else.> _ She felt a wave of… Jealousy? But before she could chase its origin he sent.  _ <Didn’t she sleep in your room on Monday night after the fire?> _ Rey shrugged,  _ <She did, but I was unconscious… It’s different.> _ She could feel it as he thought about sneaking up the girls stairs after lights out. _ <I don’t think we should do that again. It’s too risky.> _ She didn’t let him see what Hux had said, it wouldn’t help matters any.

He sighed in defeat, thunder still rolled overhead and she closed her eyes against the intermittent lightning, snuggling deeper into his embrace as if she could escape the storm.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was brought to you by the song ‘Control The Storm’ by Delain  
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	63. Sleepless

Rey and Kylo seperated with great reluctance when it was time to go up to their rooms. As Rey settled into her nest alone, it seemed  _ very _ empty, and  _ very _ cold. Kylo always seemed to run so  _ hot.  _ She shivered beneath her comforter and blankets, then got up and pulled on a hoodie. The bright flashes of lightning penetrated through the curtain and made it impossible to concentrate on homework or reading; so she sat in the dark, listening to the storm batter the world outside.

Still, this was no desert storm. She was safe in her room. She was. She was. She was…  _ <I love you.> _ Kylo sounded drowsy but she heard him clearly, and she was suddenly worried her fear was keeping him awake.  _ <I love you too.> _ She sent, then carefully started to wall up her anxiety from him, going slowly so it wouldn't be obvious. There was no reason they should both have a sleepless night.

She lay back down in her nest and covered her face with a pillow so she couldn’t see the lightning. But that made it hard to breathe so she removed it again, huffing in irritation.

After almost two hours, she got up again, found her goggle light and whetstone, and retrieved her knives from under the table and chair.

Honing her blades made her calmer, like the work she had done on her staff earlier, it had a meditative effect... And when she had a blade or staff in her hand, it was easier to be brave; whether the threat was from a person  _ or _ a storm. For most of her life, a blade in her hand had meant survival.

Once she had honed every blade she had, she carefully oiled the ones that needed it, then returned them to their current hiding places.

Sleep continued to elude her, so she organised her wardrobe. It was a novel experience, and didn’t take her very long but it was strangely satisfying. After that she went on to arrange her desk so everything was neat and orderly, lining up her textboots against the wall and using one of her old boots to stop them from tipping over.

Then she got out her tool kit and lock pick roll and sat in her nest, meticulously checking them over and making sure they were all in the correct places.

Once she was done she realised the wind had died down a little, and while the thunder and lightning could still be seen and heard, they were slowly easing off.

_ Yet,  _ she was still wide awake; still too jumpy to settle down and read… She almost smacked herself in the head. Her room may not be very big, but she had a whole corridor to herself! She quietly opened her door, grinning at the long empty space. It would still be too narrow for her staff and she would have to modify any katas she did, but it was better than nothing. Better than sitting in the dark, thinking dark thoughts and flinching every five minutes.

 

At 5am she called a halt and padded downstairs to drink some water and make some tea. The lights were low and she assumed she was the only one around, until a very angry looking man stalked through the kitchen. He’d gone two paces out the door before he backtracked and glared at her.

“What are  _ you _ doing?” His tone sounded like an accusation. This must be Stold, Rey hadn’t actually met him till now. She gestured to where her tea was brewing. “Just making a drink. I couldn’t sleep.”

He made a disbelieving sound but disappeared without saying anything more. How odd. She decided her tea had brewed long enough and poured it into a large mug with a generous spoon of honey. Although she was sleepless, she was exhausted - hopefully the honey and caffeine would give her the kick she needed.

“Twice in twelve hours, I  _ am  _ lucky.” Rey jerked at Hux’s voice, almost spilling her tea. She turned to face him, a low growl sounding in her throat. “I really wouldn’t antagonise me,  _ Hux _ . I’m running on no sleep and I currently don’t have the energy to ignore my urge to  _ kill you. _ ”

He merely smirked at her as he moved further into the kitchen, hair wild and dark circles smudged under his eyes. “I couldn’t sleep either.” He said in a weirdly conversational voice as he started making coffee. 

Rey wouldn’t give a flying fuck if he hadn’t slept for a month. She made a disgusted sound and went to move past him, but he blocked her and she glared up at him. _ “Move.” _

He smirked. “If you’re going to the reading room, I’ll join you.” Rey considered throwing her hot tea all over him, but then she’d have to make more and she was really enjoying drinking it  _ now. _

“I’m going back to my room. Now,  _ move. _ ” His eyes wandered over her face, “I can follow you there too. There’s no one else around.” He was using that menacingly silky tone he seemed to have got down to a fine art. Rey was too tired for his bullshit. “I’ve just seen Stold. But by all means, follow me. Then I can push you down the stairs, hopefully breaking your neck in the process. Now, for the last fucking time;  _ MOVE.” _

He moved partially out of her way and she went round him. “Or, we could just try having a normal conversation. You must be bored after being awake all night. I know I am.”

Rey didn’t bother answering, if a broken nose and a failed attempt at killing him hadn’t got through his thick skull, she really was going to have to end him. Sadly, peanuts were now out. She muttered angrily to herself all the way back up the stairs.

 

When she was showered and dressed and it was time to go back downstairs her body decided that  _ now _ it would be able to go to sleep.  _ Bloody typical. _

Why  _ was _ she so tired anyway? She’d gone without more sleep than this before and been okay. Perhaps it was because her body knew she was somewhere safe now? The adrenaline she normally relied upon to keep her alert was not forthcoming. 

A hand on her shoulder had her jumping two foot in the air, turning with a snarl expecting to see Hux again. Instead she found Kylo, eyes wide and bemusement morphing into concern. “Are you okay?” Rey wiped the snarl off her face and took a breath. “Tired. Just tired. I haven’t slept.” She said shortly and instantly winced at the stab of guilt that spiked through the bond from him. “It’s not your fault, Kylo. I’ll be fine.” He gave her a doubtful look. “You don’t  _ look  _ fine.” Rey glared at him, and he hurried on, “We should get some food in you, that’ll give you some energy.” The thought of eating right now made her want to spew. She shook her head. “I’m not hungry.”

Kylo frowned at her and took her hand. “You need to eat or you’ll faint.” Rey squared her shoulders and straightened her spine. “No, I won’t. Though I may try having some coffee, tea hasn’t hasn’t seemed to make any difference today.”

The others caught up and they all walked to the refectory together. The rain had stopped and the dark clouds had receded but Rey’s head felt as if another storm was due any moment. She endured Finn and the girls fussing over her as they walked, letting their helpful suggestions wash over her.  _ <I think you should take a sick day.> _ Kylo sent as they were about to enter the refectory. Rey huffed in irritation.  _ <I’ll have coffee and I’ll be fine.> _ She may visit the nurse at lunchtime and ask for more painkillers though.

She chose a table and sat on her own, nursing a mug of coffee, which was disgusting, as she stared blindly out of the glass walls. The room was warm and it made her feel even more drowsy. When the others sat down to eat, Rey’s stomach churned at the smell of the food and she stood abruptly. “Going to see if a walk wakes me up. Finn, I’ll see you in class.” And she walked off, not really hearing their questions. She may as well have been a zombie. Kylo caught up with her, pulling her to stand still as he turned her to face him. “I don’t think you should go out on your own, you don’t seem very alert.” His voice was soft with concern and she managed to give him a small smile. “The cold air will help wake me up. It’s  _ daylight, _ Kylo. I will be fine, and I’ll stick to the fields if that makes you happier?  _ And,  _ I’ll tell you when I get to class, okay? Go eat your breakfast.”

He frowned unhappily but nodded, giving her a quick kiss before she turned and trudged outside. She didn’t really see her surroundings, just relished the cold wind on her face and in her eyes, lifting some of the fog she seemed to be shrouded in.

 

The morning was utterly vile. At least she had Finn with her to poke her in the ribs if she lost focus. By lunchtime, she had very sore ribs.

They went to the nurse on their way to the refectory and Joselor reluctantly gave Rey some painkillers. Kylo was waiting outside the refectory, a look of relief painted itself across his features as he saw she and Finn approach and he swiftly closed the space between them and pulled her into his arms.  _ <Why have you been blocking me? Did something happen?> _ Rey frowned up at him. “But I wasn’t blocking.” She said, though now she thought about it, the bond had been oddly quiet.  _ <Not out loud!> _ Kylo sent, then spoke. “Come and eat something, this time I insist.” He told her firmly, and Finn, who had been looking back and forth between them with a suspicious look on his face, nodded emphatically. “He’s right, Peanut. Especially if you’re taking painkillers. Let’s get you some lemonade and something salty to eat.”

Rey was vaguely aware of Kylo asking Finn why she had painkillers, but she was too tired to follow it and allowed herself to be ushered around the refectory and pushed into a seat.

The lemonade did help settle her stomach and she managed to have some salty cracker things and a bowl of berries and fruit.

Half an hour later and she was feeling slightly more human. She rested her head on Kylo’s arm and laced her fingers with his _ , <Sorry. I worried you.> _

She caught the curve of his lips from the corner of her eye.  _ <That’s okay. I’m just glad you’re alright. We were thinking of hitting the gym after school, but I think you need to rest. I could teach you to play God Of War instead? I think you’d like it.> _ Rey squeezed his hand.  _ <Another time? I have Leia at 4pm. I’ll see you after the gym?> _ A sense of irritation filtered through the bond.  _ <Cancel on her, she won’t mind.> _ Rey shifted in her seat, fighting to keep a grimace off her face.  _ <I want to go. The sooner I get these sessions over with, the better. I may have a nap afterwards and then see you at dinner?> _

Kylo gave a beleaguered sigh,  _ <Fine. But I don’t care what the weather is doing tonight, I am coming to your room.> _ Rey smiled and snuggled more closely against him.  _ <Deal… I am sorry, I didn’t ask how you slept?> _ Kylo lifted his arm and tucked her under it and more firmly against him.  _ <Not great, but I did get some… I missed you.> _ They sat silent for a while, listening to the Knights chat amongst themselves - Poe’s group had gone outside to make the most of the fleeting sunshine. Rey’s mind wandered and she found herself thinking about Hux… What sort of thing stopped a shit-weasel like him from sleeping? ... _ Why on earth did she care?  _ She didn’t… apart from...  _ why _ wasn’t he afraid or at least,  _ concerned, _ that she’d almost killed him? It wasn’t  _ normal.  _ Where was his instinct for self-preservation? 

Think of the devil and he shall appear… Hux sauntered past the table they were at and paused to smirk down at Rey and Kylo. “Nice chat this morning, Scavenger. I like it when I get you all to myself.”

Rey felt Kylo’s fury spike through the bond, it was an almost physical feeling. She held onto him tightly, glaring at Hux as he walked away from them. Power crackled where Rey’s hand touched Kylo’s and without pausing to think it through, Rey flicked it at Hux’s retreating back, shaping it in her mind like a sharp jab to his kidneys. 

Hux stumbled and yelped, pivoting on the spot to look back at them, confusion clouding his face as he saw only his lackeys standing anywhere near him.

Rey grinned. Part of her knew she shouldn’t, but that part could shut the fuck up and just let her have this. Kylo’s anger drained away as soon as it had come. He looked down at her, a smirk and a frown warring for dominance on his face. “Did one of you just…  _ do something to Hux? _ ” Ingalan asked quietly as he and the other Knights leaned over the table to regard Rey and Kylo. Rey thought about trying to look innocent but decided that horse had bolted.  _ <You really shouldn’t have done that.> _ Kylo sent, it carried little weight, she could tell he was grinning inside.

Rey shrugged. “Yeah.” She answered Ingalan, she didn’t elaborate any further though. Javiell frowned at her. “What did he mean, he got you all to himself?” She felt the laughter inside Kylo drain away. “Yes. I’d like to know that too.” He said, voice now flat.

Rey sighed, her satisfaction gone. “I went downstairs to make myself some tea. Hux turned up. He was a dick. And I left.” They all frowned at her. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Kylo asked angrily. Rey rolled her eyes, “I didn’t think it was worth mentioning. He didn’t touch me. I was in his presence less than two minutes.” They continued to frown at her.  _ Light! _ what was she supposed to say? 

The bell rang and the moment was broken. “Next time, you call me, okay? I don’t care if I’m asleep, you call me.” Kylo growled as they stood. Rey carefully  _ did not  _ roll her eyes...  _ or agree.  _ It was a ridiculous idea.

Before they went their separate ways, Kylo captured her face in his hands and gave her a lip bruising kiss where everyone in the refectory could see.

Rey was blushing when he let her go. She had an uncomfortable feeling that that had been less a kiss goodbye, and more a warning to others. Kylo Ren was an idiot. Still, she wore a soft smile on her way to her next lesson.

 

The last lesson of the day seemed to drag on forever, the classroom they were in was warm and stuffy, and again Finn had to keep poking her in the ribs.

He flung a supportive arm around her shoulder as they walked back to the dorm. “Well, Peanut. You made it. I don’t know how you did, but you’re still awake, you didn’t faint and nothing bad has happened. I call that a win.”

Rey smiled. “Don’t say that till I’ve had my session with Leia. That’ll be when I’ve made it.” She yawned, ducking her head. “Well, okay, I’ll say it to you then. We’ll probably be out on basketball court as the field is too muddy. Come find us when you’re done if you aren’t too tired, but otherwise I’ll look for you at dinner?”

Rey nodded. “Sounds good. The knights are hitting the gym so I guess we’ll all meet up at dinner.”

Rey only had twenty minutes before her session with Leia, so she quickly changed out of her school clothes, breathing a happy sigh of relief as she pulled on plain jeans and a long sleeved top. She splashed her face with some cold water and neatened up her hair before shoving her feet in her old soft boots, grabbing her zip up hoodie and starting towards the stairs.

She’d gone three paces when she realised she had no knives on her; she hesitated for a second, then went back to her room and carefully slid two narrow throwing knives in her right boot, and slipped her favourite one in the back of her waist band. Finally satisfied she left her room. 

The effect of the water she had splashed on her face lasted barely five minutes though and as she walked to the main school building she yawned, grimacing as the movement made her head hurt more. She squinted up at the sky, it was blue with patchy clouds scudding quickly across it. No sign of anything remotely storm-like. So why did it feel like someone had crashed a Mac truck into her skull?

As she entered the main school building she thought she felt a vibration of wrongness in the air, but she lost it a second later. It would appear being sleepy made her twitchy. She muted the bond, not wanting to worry Kylo with her silliness and also not wanting him to see anything to do with her session with Leia. Things were already complicated enough as it was.

As she got closer to Leia’s office, the vibrations repeated themselves, there, then gone. There, then gone. Rey wondered if lack of sleep could make the nerves in your brain fizzle and sputter randomly.

As she put her hand on the Leia’s door, a  _ disturbance, _ a shock of something wrong rippled through her but again it disappeared into nothing. She hesitated for a moment, then shook herself and knocked on the door.

Her sluggish brain didn’t register that the voice that called, “Enter,” was not Leia’s. Not until she was turning to close the door behind her, did she realise something wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> N: So I haven’t slept for two days now #failwhale, I blame this chapter, or this chapter blames me? ...Also, yeah, you probably hate me for this cliffy.. Oops.  
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥
> 
> Songs in my head: (Sometimes they are relevant, the title or lyrics or part of the lyrics are echoed, other times, there is no tangible connection whatsoever, also beware, sometimes the lyrics contain spoilers!)
> 
> ~21:13 by Coheed and Cambria  
> ~Worried about Ray by The Hoosiers  
> ~Beneath The Silence by Angel Dust


	64. ...Something wicked this way comes

Rey’s head whipped back to stare at the man who was standing in front of the window, and then her eyes slid to Leia’s limp body next to him, lying still in her chair, eyes closed. 

Rey’s instincts kicked in, and things started moving very fast. She had one of the knives out of her boot and arm pulled back to throw when the man lifted a gun fitted with a silencer and pointed it at Leia’s head. “She is still alive, merely sleeping. But make one more move and I will kill her.”

Rey froze. She could feel her heartbeat hammering in her chest, the pulse at her throat as her brain started to work out her options… Whatever she did, Kylo  _ must not know _ . He was too full of fire, the beast in him may not understand that you could not just rush a man holding a gun. She strengthened her shields. Whatever happened, she must protect him.

“Good. Now, drop the blade on the floor and kick it over to me.” The man told her, voice calm as he watched her. Rey complied. “Now, if you want her to continue living, you will follow my instructions.” He paused and Rey gave him a curt nod. “First, you will show me the brand on your back, move slowly.” Her brand? ... _ Shit. _ If she did that, he’d see her other knife. She looked into his cold brown eyes as he audibly clicked off the safety on the gun, placing it an inch from Leia’s right temple.  _ Rey had no choice. _ She turned her back to him, every nerve screaming at her that this was a  _ stupid _ thing to do… But she’d never had to deal with situations like this, there’d never been anyone for her to protect but herself.  _ Until now. _

Once she was facing the door she pulled up her top and hoodie, exposing the knife and her brand.

There was an amused chuckle from behind her. “Drop the knife, then turn nice and slow and kick it over.” Again she complied, her movements deliberate as her brain ran haywire, trying to think of a solution that wouldn’t end up with Leia dead.

“Now. You will go downstairs and out the front of this building, then you will walk along the drive behind the hedge until you come to the second group of trees there you will be met by someone. I am in contact with him now. If you don’t arrive in three minutes, I will kill this woman. If you don’t arrive on your own, I will kill this women. If someone should come to this room, she will die. Do you understand?” Rey pushed down the nausea in her belly and nodded again. This seemed to amuse him. “What, no pleading? No demands to know why I am doing this?” Rey shook her head as she said quietly, “It doesn’t matter.” The man nodded as he regarded her. “Smart girl.” Rey swallowed, “Do I have your oath she will be unharmed if I do as you say?” The man looked at her for a few seconds before shrugging. “Nothing in this life is certain. Now go, remember you have three minutes. Try not to get noticed, you know what will happen if you do.”

Rey shot one last look at Leia, swallowed the bile that burned her throat and left the room, closing the door behind her. Her mind and body were pure chaos, and that was unacceptable. Leia’s life was at stake, despite the man's lack of assurance he would not harm Leia, it wouldn't make sense for him to kill her if Rey did as she was told. At least, she  _ hoped so. _ But this wasn't helping. She took three calming breaths as she went downstairs, pushing herself as far into the icy void as she could. There was a possibility that when she got to the man's accomplice and they had confirmed her arrival, she may be able to reach her one remaining knife in her boot. But it would be risky… As she walked she studied his appearance in her mind, trying to learn something from the details she could remember. He was tall, perhaps six foot, strongly built but not so large that he couldn't be quick. And his relaxed demeanor and lack of concern slated him as a professional. He had the dark tan and features of a desert dweller.  _ But who was he? And why was he here?  _ He had known about her brand… She shook her head, these thoughts were for another time. Before she reached the first set of trees she stumbled, but picked herself up quickly as she slid the remaining knife that had rested in her boot up her sleeve. That was a bit better at least, easier to reach.

Once she was out of sight of the school windows she started running, she could feel the timer count down in the back of her head and she did not want to test these people,  _ not yet. _

The man who met her looked identical to the first one, a memory stirred in her mind at that, but right now it wasn’t important. He also held a gun with a silencer, pointed directly at her.

His dead brown eyes regarded her without emotion as he gestured her off the path by the road and deeper into the trees. “Follow that path.” He indicated a trail made by local wildlife and she did, her back itching with the feeling of his eyes on her, burning with the knowledge there was a gun aimed at her unprotected back. And she could do nothing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo checked the bond at about 5.30, he’d intentionally ignored it while Rey was with Leia, but she would be finished by now, if not before and he wanted to make sure she was okay.

Rey’s end was dark and quiet, she was deeply asleep. That could only be good, she had been exhausted. 

Even so an odd thread of worry tried winding itself about him. He batted it away, pushing down his paranoia as he threw himself back into working out. 

 

He and the Knights found Poe and his friends already in the refectory. Kylo frowned as he noticed Rey wasn’t with them and the bond indicated she was still sleeping.

He knew she needed sleep but he didn’t like it when she skipped meals and she hadn’t eaten much today as it was.

He looked at Jess as he sat down, “Would you mind checking on Rey? I think she’s napping but she needs to eat something. She can always go back to sleep afterwards.”

He caught Finn frowning at him but ignored it. Jess nodded. “Sure, I’m almost done eating. I’ll go get her when I’m finished.”

“Thanks.” He told her, a little awkwardly, then started on his food. Jess and the other two girls left when they had finished their meals.

They hadn’t been gone long before they returned to the refectory. Rey was not with them. They were winded, breathing harshly, worry pinching their faces. Kylo felt the cold fingers of fear grip his heart.

“She’s not there!” Jess gasped as she came to a halt by their table. He noticed the blond girl’s eyes were wet. “Her nest hasn’t been slept in, there’s no sign of her and no one we asked said they had seen her for a while!”

There was a rushing in Kylo’s ears and he suddenly realised he was running, he was already out of the refectory, feet pounding the path as he ran to their dorm.

He reached out, but Rey was silent, dark, seemingly still asleep… _ Or was she unconscious?  _ He tore through the common area, ignored Mara as she shouted after him when he ran up the girls stairs.

Rey’s room was as empty as Jess had said. Her school bag and her uniform were laid on the mattress, but otherwise there was no sign of her. Her nest was neat,  _ empty. _

The Knights tore into the room, staring wildly around them, Kylo realised he wasn’t breathing correctly and tried to calm it.

“What the hell do you think you’re all doing?” Mara stood in the doorway, incandescent with fury. 

“Have you seen Rey?” He asked her urgently, “When did you last see her?” Mara blinked at him, thrown by his panicked tone. “Not since earlier when she came in with Finn. What is going on, Kylo?”

Kylo didn’t answer, she knew nothing, she was useless. He barged past her and ran downstairs, taking them four at a time. He ran into Finn and Poe as he tore through the common area. He grabbed Finn by the arms, “When did you last see Rey?” He almost shouted at him.

Finn’s eyes were already wide, “When she came in to change before seeing Leia. Kylo, what’s going on?”

“She’s  _ not here.” _ He answered, his voice raw as he thought...Hux? _ Could Hux have done something? _ He hadn’t seen him this evening. Kylo turned with a snarl and ran back to the lobby, up the boys stairs.

He thrust Hux’s dorm room door open so hard it crashed against the wall. Hux stood up from his desk, an angry look on his face morphing quickly into alarm. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He shouted.

Kylo flung Hux’s lackeys aside till he had Hux by the throat. “Where is Rey?” He snarled as Hux scrabbled at his hands. “ _ Where is she _ ?”

Ingalan and Zainmar pulled him off Hux, and he snarled at them too. “He can’t answer if he can't breathe!” Ingalan told him in a strained voice.   

“You heard him.” Javiell said as he and Leonmar backed a still gasping Hux into a corner. “Where is she?”

Hux’s eyes were panicked, confused. “I don’t know! Last time I saw her was at lunch with you!” He pulled himself upright, “What’s going on? Is she missing?” Kylo snarled at him, shaking himself loose from Ingalan and Zainmar as he thought.

“Kylo, can’t you sense her?” Ingalan muttered quietly and Kylo shook his head. “No. She’s asleep, or unconscious.” His told them despairingly.

Hux came into his line of sight, “I’ll help you search.” Kylo and the Knights ignored him. “But can’t you  _ feel _ where she is? Follow your connection?” Leonmar asked. Hux frowned at him.

Kylo clenched his fists.  _ Why the fuck hadn’t that occurred to him? _ He had let his fear make him  _ stupid _ . He shut his eyes, breathed out... And he realised with abject terror that she was nowhere near, that in fact, she was  _ miles _ away….

 

A sharp stinging impact on his cheek made his eyes snap open and he found himself on the floor, head dizzy with his erratic breathing.

Ingalan crouched before him. “Kylo, snap out of it. Tell us what you found and  _ we will fix it.” _

“She’s  _ gone. _ She’s  _ not here. _ ” He gasped, took a breath. “And she’s unconscious. Someone  _ took _ her.” 

Those men, the fire, her files.  _ They _ had taken her from him, and  _ he hadn’t known _ .  _ Hadn’t felt it.  _ He was spiralling. This wasn’t helpful. This wouldn’t help him  _ get her back. _ He would move heaven and earth, if that’s what it took.

He stood, forcing his breathing to calm. He looked at his Knights,  _ his brothers. _ “They took her. It must have been those men we saw on Wednesday night.” 

“What men? What are you talking about?” Hux asked, no one answered him. “Ingalan, go get Luke, Leonmar, grab Han, I’ll go find Leia…” He paused as he realised Leia was probably the last person to see Rey, but what if…

“Oh,  _ shit! _ ” Ingalan said as he got there too. Kylo swallowed. “Come with me, we may need back up.” He said then turned on his heel and started running again, passing a shouting Mara on his way back down down the stairs.

When they were near the corridor that Leia’s office was on, Kylo paused. “There may be nothing, I may be wrong. But we should probably stay quiet.” He said softly.

“I still don’t understand why we’re even here.” Hux’s voice sounded behind them. Kylo turned to gape at him. “And we don’t understand why  _ you’re _ here.” Zainmar told him flatly. “Off you fuck,  _ Hux.  _ This is Knight’s business.” 

Kylo watched Hux set his jaw stubbornly. “I’m not leaving till you explain what is going on.” Kylo pushed him roughly against the wall. “I don’t  _ have time _ . Now be quiet, I don’t know what we’ll find.”

He shoved Hux roughly away and walked softly towards his Mother’s room. A ripple of  _ wrongness  _ hit him from twenty feet away, after fifthteen feet it came in wave after wave. His hand itched for a sabre, a knife,  _ anything. _

When he reached the door he paused to take a breath, assess the wrongness. It wasn’t urgent, it was more like a distress beacon than a warning of impending danger.

He opened the door hesitantly, ducking down low in case his senses had misled him. Once it was fully open and no one had come at him, he stood, sweeping his gaze over everything until his eyes fell on the form of his mother.

_ “No!”  _ He cried, moving swiftly to her, hands fluttering over her, unsure what to do. She was so still… Lifeless?  _ No, _ her chest moved gently. “She’s alive!” He said to the room in general, to himself. He gazed at her a little longer, then turned to see the Knights searching the room.

“I found these.” Javiell said grimly. “I’m assuming they’re Rey’s.” Kylo looked at them, a small narrow blade, and the old, battered sheath of her favourite knife, the knife she had marked him with. He swallowed thickly, his relief at his Mother being alive evaporating. “Yes. They’re hers… Can you see any blood?”

They all shook their heads. “No, and there’s no sign of a struggle either.” Ingalan said. Kylo looked back at his Mother, thinking.

“I can’t believe Rey went down without a struggle.” Leonmar said. “Or would give up her knives easily.”

Kylo hadn’t heard Rey cry out, hadn’t felt her fear or panic or anger.  _ She had walled it all away...   _ The time she had been weak from the smoke inhalation, s _ he had called for him.  _ The night Hux had taken her,  _ she had screamed for him. _

Kylo felt a burning sensation in his stomach. “She may have gone quietly to protect Leia.  _ It was a trap.” _

That night they had seen them, those men that Rey had felt so keenly, they had been in the school. If they saw her files, they would have seen the note on Rey’s session after school with Leia. They would have seen the room number. 

He cursed himself inside his head. If only he’d spent last night with her, if he had, she would have slept, she would have been alert, she would have had warning of the wrongness.

“Okay.” He took a breath, he needed a clear head. “We need Luke and Han. I’ll stay with Leia. One of you see if you can break into the school office so we can see the cctv.”

The Knights all looked at the door as Hux cleared his throat. “What?” Kylo snarled at him. Hux’s face was pale. “I know where the spare office key is.” Kylo blinked at him, then nodded, he may as well use him. “Jav, go with Hux. Ingalan, grab Joselor. Zain, get Han and Leonmar try and track down Luke… I’ll stay here and try and see if I can get a better idea of where Rey is.”

The Knights left quickly, Javiell pulling a protesting Hux along by the arm.

Kylo shoved Rey’s sheathed knife into his jeans and wrapped the blade of the smaller one in some paper before putting it carefully into his pocket.

He didn’t want to touch Leia or try and wake her in case he did something wrong, so he folded himself into the stupidly uncomfortable chair he used when in this room and closed his eyes, trying to follow the tenuous thread that was what had become of his bond with Rey.

_ All was darkness _ ; he tried to push into her mind to see if he could enter her dreams and speak to her but it was useless, so he tried to work out in which direction she was being taken.

 

Joselor arrived first, Kylo’s eyes snapped open as Leia’s office door opened and Ingalan came in with Joselor behind him. “I really don’t see why Leia had you fetch me rather than coming herself-” She was saying waspishly to Ingalan’s back as they entered, but she stopped complaining as soon as she saw Leia.

“What in the name of the Light happened?” She cried as she rushed to kneel by Leia. “We don’t know, exactly.” Kylo said as he stood up from the chair. Joselor started and looked back at him. “We think Rey has been…  _ Kidnapped _ . She had a session with Leia at 4 this afternoon. When we realised Rey was missing we came here and found her gone and Leia, well like this. I haven’t moved her other than to check she was still… alive.” Kylo told her in a rush, to stop her interrupting him.

Joselor’s mouth set in a grim line and she turned back to examine Leia. “We need to phone the police, and an ambulance.” She said as she checked Leia’s vitals. “Your Mother seems to be unharmed, but I think she has been drugged.” She said and started to examine Leia’s exposed skin. “Yes, there. There’s a puncture wound and residue on her neck, but I don’t want to try and wake her until an ambulance arrives, in case there are complications.”

She stood, looked at Kylo and then Ingalan. “I’m going downstairs to phone-” She was interrupted by Luke running through the door, he brushed by Joselor and knelt, grabbing one of Leia’s hands in his and placing his other hand on her forehead as he closed his eyes.

Leonmar arrived, breathing deeply, and a few seconds later there was the unmistakable sound of large paws with claws pounding the corridor tiles, getting swiftly closer.

Leonmar moved back from the door as Chewie bowled through the doorway, hackles up and eyes glowing, a low hacking growl emanating in his throat.

“Get that damn  _ animal  _ out of here!” Joselor shouted angrily as Han and Zainmar appeared in the doorway, breathing ragged. “ _ Shut up _ , Joselor.” Han grated at her as he too rushed to Leia’s side. Kylo looked at Ingalan and jerked his head at Joselor, Ingalan nodded.

“Joselor, shall I go with you to ring for the ambulance and police?” Ingalan asked as he gently took her arm, she blinked then nodded. “Yes. I must do that now.” She shot another glare at Chewie but went. “Leonmar, can you go check on Jav?” Leonmar nodded and left too. 

_ “Ben _ , what happened to your mother?  _ What the hell is going on?” _ Han said from the floor as he knelt at Leia’s other side, voice was unsteady. Kylo felt the need to hug him. He pushed it down.

“We think Rey has been taken by the same people that burnt down the library and stole her files... She had a session with... Mum, at 4 this afternoon. We didn’t realise Rey was missing till dinner, she was really tired and said she may take a nap after seeing Mum, so I didn’t look for her till then. When we couldn’t find her in the dorm we came here… Mum was like this and there were two of Rey’s knives on the floor… Joselor says Mum’s okay but has been drugged…”

He trailed off, angrily scrubbing his hands across his eyes at the moisture burning there. “What of your bond?” Luke asked quietly, it was the first time he had spoken.

“Rey’s unconscious, but, but she is a long way away already... I  _ need  _ to go after her.” Every second took her farther away from him.

“How was this even possible?” Han asked angrily, “Their session was during _bloody_ _daylight!”_

Kylo debated briefly whether he should tell them about Wednesday night, then shook his head at himself.  _ Of course he should. He should have told them on Thursday. No, he should have woken them up that same night! This was  _ _ all his fault! _

“There’s more.” Han and Luke both looked at him, the weight of their stares palpable. Kylo swallowed. “They broke in again on Wednesday night.”

_ “What?!” _ Han barked, Kylo almost flinched at his tone. “You need to explain, Ben.” Luke said, slightly more calmly, _ slightly. _

“Rey felt them, the feeling woke her up and she woke me… She wanted to do some, well she called it reconnaissance. She wanted to know what was going on, and thought if we could observe them, it may tell her, tell us, who they were and what they wanted… we were careful, they didn’t know we were there.”

Han had closed his eyes, a pained, angry expression on his face as he breathed deeply. Luke gave Kylo a disappointed look. “That was an extremely,  _ extremely _ dangerous and  _ stupid  _ thing to do, Ben. What were you thinking? Even with the way you and Rey fight, they could have taken you both.”

Kylo was aware of Zainmar shifting by the door, “They weren’t alone.” Zainmar said loyally, “We all went. And we were careful. And at least we laid eyes on them, we got _ something.” _

Luke included Zainmar in his disappointed look, he sighed. “ _ Of course _ you were. Well, you may as well tell us what you saw.”

Kylo shook his head, “There isn’t  _ time. _ I need to leave  _ now, _ I can feel her, our connection is growing more distant with  _ each minute. _ ”

Luke shook his head and Han opened his eyes to copy him. “You are not going anywhere. This is a matter for the police, Ben.”

Kylo stared at them in disbelief.  _ Of course _ he was going.  _ Of course _ he would find her.  _ She was his. _ She was  _ his soulmate _ ,  _ his other half _ , she was the one that  _ made his heart beat. _ And if they thought they could stop him, they were sorely mistaken. All they were doing was making his task harder. But it was  _ his task _ and he would do it, even if it killed him.

“Kylo?” Kylo snapped his head up, realising he had been ignoring them. It was Zainmar who had spoken. His love for his brothers surged inside him, Zainmar gave him a small nod.  _ He understood. _

“What I asked was-  _ why; _ if they woke her up in her dorm when they were all the way over here on Wednesday night, didn’t Rey sense them this afternoon?” Han said.

Kylo sighed, “She didn’t sleep at all last night, she was frightened by the storm - apparently the storms she is used to are rather different from the ones we get here… So she was exhausted today, she was barely awake and she didn’t eat much. She had blocked me all morning and hadn’t even realised she’d done it.” A heavy head thrust itself into his hand and Kylo stroked it. Chewie was always a comforting presence, whatever the situation, as he looked down into the dog’s glowing eyes, he knew Chewie understood. _ I’ll find her. _ He told the dog silently,  _ I will.  _ Chewie made a noise that sounded like approval.

A thought occurred to him and he looked back up at Luke, “What of you? What of your… connection to Mum?” Luke ran his hands distractedly through his hair as he looked down at his twin. “We do not possess anything like the, bond she share with Rey and I was off campus when this seems to have taken place, when I returned, it felt as though she were asleep and I didn’t enter the main building before Leonmar came to fetch me…” He trailed off then shook himself and looked back up at Kylo. “And what did you learn of them? These intruders?” Kylo rolled his shoulders, “Not much.” He admitted painfully. “There were two of them, when we found them, they were outside, on the steps of the front entrance. They were arguing but not in a language I recognised. Then they left, we heard them leave on motorbikes out of sight of the school. Once it was safe, Rey examined the entrance door… it seemed to freak her out. She said they were professionals, not the same people who broke into the school during the fire... But she thought it was these two who had started the fire in the first place.”

Luke and Han exchanged a look that Kylo wasn’t sure how to interpret. “What did these two men look like?” Luke asked.

Kylo shrugged unhappily, “Fairly tall, darker skin, dark hair. Both dressed in black… They didn’t look like they were from around here.” It wasn’t much, but hopefully it was better than nothing.

As if on cue the other Knights returned, oddly Hux was still with them.

“We got eyes on him.” Javiell said excitedly, without preamble. “And on Rey. Time stamped and everything.”

Kylo started walking, “Show me. Chewie, guard Leia. Luke, Han, come with me.” Han started protesting angrily but Kylo was already out the door. He needed as much information as possible, and he needed it before it was lost behind police tape and interfering adults.

The Knights flanked him as they hurriedly jogged down to the office. “I still don’t see what these people want with her.” Hux muttered as they went. Kylo turned to raise an eyebrow at Javiell, who shrugged. “He wouldn’t shut up and I was trying to concentrate, so I told him about the fire and the break ins.”

Kylo took a calm breath, there wasn’t really any reason Hux couldn’t know, he supposed. “Why are you still even here?” Kylo asked him.

Hux shrugged, “She… interests me.” Kylo snorted, what had he expected? An honest answer?

When they got to the office they went straight to the main monitor, and to Kylo’s surprise Hux took the chair, quickly scrolling back to 3.40pm. “We think this is the man. Javiell said he looked familiar anyway, and everyone else shown is a teacher or a student.”

“Who said you could look at these?” They all turned to find that Han and Luke had followed them afterall.  Luke gave Han a quelling look and came over to stand with them. Han sighed and joined him. “Roll the damn tape.” Han instructed irritably.

And there he was, Kylo was certain that was one of the men he had seen on Wednesday night, brazenly walking along the path and up to the main entrance as if he belonged there and everything was totally normal.

Once he disappeared Hux scrolled through again, he paused it and said, “And this is when we see Rey, at 4.06.” He started the the video again.

Kylo’s gut clenched as he watched Rey walk out, her posture stiff. She was moving swiftly, then stumbled but caught herself before she fell. Then she moved quickly out of range. “Show me that again, slow it down.” Luke said and Hux scrolled back.

Now that it was slow, Kylo realised that fall had been a sham, Rey had pulled something out of her boot… “Resourceful.” Luke murmured to himself. She’d pulled a knife free, one of those small ones from her boot. Kylo closed his eyes briefly, clearly she hadn’t had a chance to use it, or she had and been knocked out because of it.

Hux scrolled on, “And this is when the same man leaves, at 4.10” Again the man walked casually, confidently, going in the same direction as Rey.

Sirens sounded in the distance. They didn’t have much time to get more information before they would be treated like children again.

“Can I borrow Chewie?” He asked Han. “He’s shut in with Leia, I’ll send him down.” Han said and left. Kylo left too and went to the entrance hall to wait, the Knights with him, and still there too, was Hux.

“Look, thanks for your help with the cctv, but this is where we part ways.” Kylo told him stiffly. Hux gave him an unimpressed look. “You’re going to use the dog to track where she went, aren't you?”

Kylo blinked in surprise then glared at Hux. “ _ Shut up! _ We need to get this done before the bloody police arrive. If we don’t, we won’t be told anything.  _ Now fuck off!” _

Hux folded his arms, cold eyes flat. “You might end up spoiling evidence.” Kylo clenched his fists. “Do you really think the police in Canto Bight are going to care that a random scavenger orphan,  _ from Jakku _ , has been kidnapped? An orphan who has a _ criminal record? _ Leia is alive. If she were, if she were dead then they’d care. But they’ll piss about till Rey’s trail is cold.  _ I’m not waiting for them. _ ” He shut his mouth suddenly, realising he had said too much. Hux’s eyes glittered. “I see your point.” He said silkily. 

They were interrupted by the sound of paws. Chewie bounded up and Kylo looked in his eyes. “You need to show us Rey’s path, can you do that?” Hux made a disbelieving splutter and Chewie flicked his eyes to the red haired boy, directing a growl his way before looking back at Kylo and giving him an affirmative huff. “We need to be quick, okay?” Another answering huff.

They hurried out of the main entrance and Chewie put his nose to the ground. It was dark now but he headed off confidently along the same route that Rey had taken in the video. Kylo and the others ran to catch up as an ambulance and two police cars wailed past them.

Chewie paused before a second lot of trees, eyes glowing as he waited for them to join him. Ingalan and Javiell pulled out torches and they ventured in, the others following behind their lights.

When they came out of the trees they found an empty road. Chewie was nosing all over the place, then looked up at Kylo and whined. “They must have had a car here.” Kylo said as he watched Chewie put his nose to the ground again. Clearly the trail ended. 

Then Chewie let loose a chilling growl. He stood stock still, eyes fixed on a patch of grass. He growled again and the hairs on Kylo’s neck stood up.

They crowded close, Javiell pointing his torch at the place Chewie’s eyes were still firmly fixated on...

Blood. It was unmistakably blood.

 

**‘~o~0~o~’**

 

**In the words of Martin Lawrence in the movie,** **_Bad Boys 2_ ** **, “Shit just got real”.**

 

**‘~o~0~o~’**  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah... *Runs away with a flak jacket and helmet on*  
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my long suffering Beta ♥
> 
> Songs:
> 
> ~No One Will Save You Now by Aviators  
> ~Run by Snow Patrol  
> ~Wild Boys by Duran Duran  
> ~Your Star by Evanescence  
> ~The End Of Heartache by Killswitch Engage  
> ~Set The Fire To The Third Bar by Snow Patrol  
> ~Born Again by Beast In Black


	65. Gone Girl

Soon the path Rey was being forced to follow met a separate road, a sleek dark car with tinted windows was parked there, the front doors and boot open and another man sat on the bonnet smoking a cigarette.    
This man was not like the other two, he was scrawny with lank gold hair and a nervous smile. He stood when he saw them, “Can’t believe that worked. Nicely done, Boba-” He didn’t finish his sentence, there were two sharp phutt’s from behind Rey and the man toppled over, blood trailing down his forehead between his still open eyes. He’d been shot. He was dead.   
Boba? There was a ripple in the cold place, but otherwise Rey ignored it as she eased the knife in her sleeve, yet she was too slow. There was a sharp prick in her neck, she slapped her hand up but things started going fuzzy and dark almost immediately. Her body was already too tired, too rung out to fight and it betrayed her. Her last thought before the void swallowed her whole, was to keep her walls up and hope that Leia still lived.

~ ~ ~ 

Rey was drowning, every time she tried to break free of the dark oblivion that held her tightly in its grasp something would force her back down, back into its crushing, relentless embrace. She lost herself again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo felt sick, felt dizzy. It was  _ blood _ . Was it _ hers? _ He couldn’t speak, his mind seemed to only be able to stare, transfixed. The blood was all his eyes could see. But she was alive, he  _ knew, _ he’d  _ know, _ if Rey were… He couldn’t say that word, not even in his head, to himself.

He swallowed down his panic, and his fear. “Is it hers, Chewie? Is that Rey’s blood?” Glowing eyes met his as Chewie finally looked up. The dog pulled his lips back, baring his teeth, this was not a warning snarl, this was the snarl you saw five seconds before your throat was ripped out. Then Chewie relaxed his face and huffed, placing his head against Kylo’s leg. Kylo stood up straight. “It don’t think it’s hers.” He said, looking at Chewie. The dog didn’t contradict him.

Hux snorted derisively next to him but Ingalan spoke before the weasel could voice his disbelief. “But was it caused by her? Or was it something else?” Kylo shook his head. “There is no way to know and at this point I guess it doesn't really matter… We should be getting back. The police will want statements and I want to see how my m- Leia is doing.” Kylo shifted, uncomfortably aware of Hux’s unwelcome and eager eared presence. 

They started walking back towards the school which was now lit up like a nightclub, lights flashed and people shouted. As if the police cars reminded him, Hux asked, “How do you know Rey has a criminal record?” Kylo glared at him. “None of your fucking business.” He almost told Hux not to tell anyone, but him telling Hux wouldn’t sway him, and right now, it was something else that didn’t really matter. Hux was silent for a few moments as they left the trees and started up the path next to the drive, but not for long. “And are you sure the police won’t take this seriously? She may have been a scavenger, but somehow she got here and that took money. A lot of it.”

Why wouldn’t Hux shut up and just fuck off? “Why are you here Hux? I would have thought you’d be glad she was gone.”

“What, because she spiked my coffee with peanuts?” Hux seemed to find that almost amusing. What the fuck was wrong with him? “No, because she tried to kill you and was very disappointed when it didn’t work.” Kylo replied acidly. 

Hux blinked. “She tried to kill me?” Javiell suddenly burst out laughing, Kylo bared his teeth at Hux in a mirthless grin. “Yeah, what did you  _ think _ she was doing?”

Hux swallowed, suddenly looking unsure, “I assumed it was revenge, I thought she hadn’t  _ realised _ it could kill me.” Javiell was still laughing, “You continue to underestimate her.” Kylo told Hux. “Out of all of us, she is the most dangerous. I’d remember that if you want to carry on living when I bring her back.”

 

More police arrived, they took statements from everyone, examined the cctv, went down the path to where they had found the blood. It was irritating, yet another delay.

Leia was revived and Kylo got to see her once the medics had declared her to be okay. She was in Joselor’s room. Her face pale, anger sparking deep in her eyes.

“I’m so sorry, Ben.” Kylo blinked, stunned. “What?” He said uncertainly as Chewie followed him in and got on the bed to rest his head in Leia’s lap. Luckily Joselor wasn’t currently here or she’d be apoplectic by now.

“I’m sorry I was unable to help Rey.” She explained. She hesitated, eyes flicking to the door and back, “I’m not as strong as you and Rey, I have nothing on your abilities, but I should have guessed, I should have heeded the warning… And it seems Rey did what she could to keep me from further harm.”

Kylo shook his head, wearily sitting on the edge of the bed in what little space Chewie had left. “No. No. I was the one who should have known… I shouldn’t have let her out of my sight, not for a minute. Not for a second.” He felt tears burn his eyes and he angrily clenched his fists. “ _ This is my fault.” _

Leia stood, she was wobbly but his mother was nothing if not determined, and she shuffled over to him so she stood in front of him and she gathered him into her arms. It was the first time she had embraced him, since he had let her embrace him, since year seven. Over five years ago.

It broke him. It was like her gentle embrace had shattered a dam that had been holding everything back. He could contain his anguish no longer.

He sobbed into her waist. His breath heaving, eyes streaming, burning. It was humiliating and yet comforting at the same time.

“Han, get me a damp cloth could you, love?” Leia speaking brought Kylo back to himself, back to his location and he pulled away, embarrassedly wiping his cheeks on his sleeve. Or rather he tried to but Leia firmly stopped him and handed him a cool damp towel. When he just stared at it, she started wiping his face for him and he quickly took it from her and did it himself. He was not a child.

When he was done, he looked up to see Han and Leia…  _ Mum and Dad.  _ They were standing together as they looked down at him, Han’s arm protectively wrapped around Leia, she leaning gratefully into his embrace. It had been such a long time since he saw them together like this. He blinked up at them, suddenly tired beyond all reckoning.  

“You look like you’re about to pass out.” Han said to him, not unkindly. “Your Knights have already been sent back to your dorm, that shit-head Hux too… What?” Han said as Leia dug him in the ribs. “You’ve called him that yourself on a fair few occasions.”

Leia gave him a level look and then turned back to Kylo. “Your father's right, you need to sleep… I promise we will wake you straight away if there is any news. And you said yourself Rey is still unconscious, so you should rest.”

Kylo nodded numbly. But inside he was fighting, trying to keep his drooping eyes open and traitorous body upright.

Han’s hand on his shoulder made him start, “Come on. I’ll walk you to the dorm. You need to go now, you’ve grown too big to carry… I’ll leave Chewie with you tonight, if you like?”

Leia kissed his cheek then sat back down on the bed heavily. When was the last time she had done that? Probably longer ago than their last hug, Kylo thought numbly as Han helped him stand and they started walking.

Chewie walked on Kylo’s one side while Han helped him stay upright on the other. “Tell me. Tell me what Mum said happened. I need to know.” He asked quietly while we watched his feet.

Han sighed. “Okay, kiddo, though there isn’t much. She was in her office, preparing for Rey’s session when someone knocked on the door, though it was before 4pm she assumed Rey was just early and said to come in. A man came in…” Kylo looked up suspiciously as Han paused. “Tell me.” Han sighed again. “He had a gun, he came in and shut the door behind him. Made her sit in the chair and he checked that Rey was due at 4, after some… threats your mother confirmed that yes, Rey was due… She only did that because she thought Rey would sense the danger and get help, Ben.” Kylo just nodded and Han carried on. “After she confirmed that, he took out a dart and jammed it in her neck, and she passed out. That’s it, I’m afraid, son.”

Kylo was silent as he tried to digest it all, eventually he asked, “A dart not a syringe?” Han nodded, “Yeah, I thought that was odd too but your mother insisted that’s what it was… Luke mentioned they use poison darts in the desert and jungle regions.”

Kylo’s frown deepened. It looked like he would be going to Jakku then. He finally admitted to himself that that would not be tonight, he was almost dead on his feet, and something like this would take some planning. But he would find her, he would rescue her. And he would let nothing and no one stand in his way. He would go to hell itself if need be. And when he found her, he would never, ever let her go again. Ever.

**~~~'~o~'~~~**

_ And it feels, _ __   
_ And it feels like, _ __   
_ Heaven's so far away. _ __   
_ And it feels, _ __   
_ And it feels like, _ __   
_ The world has grown cold, _ _   
_ __ Now that you've gone away.

**~~~~~~~~~~'~o~'~~~~~~~~~~**

_ ~Gone Away Noctura (Originally by The Offspring)  _

  
  


  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I know, it’s short 0_0 Sorry! Also, next chapter may not arrive for a couple of days, again, sorry!
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	66. Plans and Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥ May the 4th Be With You ♥

 

Kylo woke to find himself still fully clothed, lying stretched out on top of the covers on his bed. He reached out to the bond, the fragile thread of it was silent, dark; Rey must still be unconscious. The Knights were sprawled all around the floor under their respective duvets. He couldn’t remember if he had spoken to them when he got back, but their presence was a huge comfort.

 

It was still dark outside and his clock showed him he had slept for only five hours. Miraculously though, he didn’t feel tired. Even as he’d slept, he had come to some conclusions about how best to proceed with Rey’s rescue and for the first task, he would need Javiell.

 

Javiell awoke as soon as Kylo put his hand on the other boy’s shoulder. “I need your help.” Kylo said softly and Javiell nodded.

As Javiell got up and put his trainers on, Kylo realised that all the Knights were sleeping fully clothed, ready to go at a moments notice. _What had he done to deserve them?_

“Where are we going?” Javiell whispered.

“Over the roof to Rey’s room.” Kylo told him as he emptied his school bag. “We’re going to collect all Rey’s weapons and tools and anything else that may look useful. I know she has a stash but I don’t know where exactly, and you’re… well you’ve always been good at finding things.”

He caught the gleam of Javiell’s teeth as he grinned. Ingalan stirred as they opened the window, sitting up abruptly, swaying slightly at the sudden headrush as he whispered, “What’s going on?”

“We’re going over to Rey’s room. But we’ll be back soon, get some more sleep.” Kylo said and slipped out the window and up onto the roof, Javiell following carefully behind him - it was the first time anyone but Kylo had taken this route.

When Kylo got to Rey’s window he had a moment of panic as it looked like it was completely closed, but then he noticed a metal file between the window and the sill. It must be one of Rey’s endless precautionary measures so she’d always have access.

He’d stuffed a couple of torch lamps in his bag and they set them up in her room so they could see more clearly.

The sight of her school clothes laid out and her empty nest made his chest hurt for a moment but he pushed the feeling aside as he went to look in her wardrobe.

He and Javiell went through everything, it felt wrong and invasive, but it would help them in their mission, so he carried on.

It was Javiell who found her knife collection, it would never have occured to Kylo to look underneath the desk and chair like that. It also never occurred to him just how many weapons she had.

“I know I’ve said this before, but your girlfriend is mental.” Javiell said softly as he placed knife after knife on the floor.

Kylo nodded wordlessly as he showed Javiell a pair of knuckle dusters he’d found in an old bag at the back of her wardrobe. They were strangely delicate, made small to fit her hands, but he could see they’d do some serious damage. He replaced them though, they wouldn’t fit him or any of the Knights.

Once they had been through everything, they stuffed all they were taking with them into Kylo’s bag and tidied up in case anyone came into her room for any reason. Kylo wondered when the police would come in to look. He was surprised they hadn’t already, but he was glad they had not… However, when or if they did come, it may cause unnecessary problems if they were to find things like her knuckle dusters, so he gathered up anything he thought the police or the school would find suspicious.

The others were all awake when they returned, putting aside their card game as he and Javiell slipped back through the window.

“What’s going on?” Zainmar asked as Kylo dumped his bag on his bed and sat down.

“We collected Rey’s weapons and tools from her room. They’ll come in handy…” He trailed off, took a breath, then said, “You don’t have to come with me-” All four of them made indignant noises but he held up his hand, “Just let me finish. “You don’t have to come with me. It is going to be dangerous, the man who did this, the one my mother saw, had a gun.” He let them digest that for a moment before carrying on. “The place I’m going to start looking, is Jakku. This will take days, if not weeks. I have no idea what I’m walking into, I have no idea how these kind of people operate…. We would be going in blind, effectively running away from school, probably stealing Han’s van… So, please, think carefully before saying you’ll come. This is serious, possibly life threatening.”

There was barely five seconds of silence before Javiell said firmly, “I’m in. Fuck school.”

“There is no way I am not coming too.” Zainmar said. “You’d do the same if the roles were reversed, Kylo.”

Leonmar nodded, “I’m with you. The police will take forever, if they even try.”

There was a pregnant pause as they all looked at Ingalan. “Kylo, _brother,_ Rey is one of us, and this is something you cannot do on your own, nor should you. We will do this together. But we will need to plan _carefully._ ”

Kylo pushed down a sob, carefully regulated his breathing. “Thank you. I, I don’t know how I was so lucky to…” He trailed off, unable to finished. But they nodded, they understood.

“So, let’s see what’s in the bag.” Zainmar said and Kylo was glad for the distraction. They were suitably shocked by its contents and Kylo added the two knives he had collected from Leia’s office to the pile.

“There is something else.” He said awkwardly as they examined the knives and tool kits. “I’m going to show you Rey’s notes, the ones we copied from the school office… The information may turn out to be useful, but… It’s also very personal, and, I think she would kill me if she knew I was showing you. She may even kill me if she ever finds out I’ve read them. So this must stay between us.”

He got out the papers and handed them to Ingalan before leaving them to it to go and have a shower. He didn’t feel able to watch their expressions as they read the horrific details that lay on those pages, he wasn’t strong enough.

But he needed to be. He needed to snap out of this fragile, broken state, it was making him weak, and right now he needed to be strong, or he would never find her.

 

When he returned to his room the Knights all looked up at him with wide eyes. Leonmar was taking a swig of firewhiskey.

“I can understand why you nearly threw up.” Ingalan said quietly, and Kylo nodded, pulling out random clothes and dressing quickly before sitting back down.

“I get why all the knives now.” Javiell said. “And… a lot of other things.”

“So, we start with this Plutt guy?” Zainmar asked and the mood shifted as they started to plan.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

When Rey finally surfaced properly, she found herself in the back of a van, windows tinted so dark that they barely let any light in at all.

She had no idea of the time of day, or even what day it was. What she did know, was that she was lying nose to nose with a dead man.

It was the same lank haired man that had been waiting by the road just before she’d been made unconscious.

She wriggled away from him, discovering that her hands were cuffed in front of her and she could feel leg restraints on her ankles, and there was a tightness around her neck. She lifted her hands up to try and work out what it was and yelped as an electric shock zapped her fingers.

_A shock collar._ They’d put a fucking shock collar on her. She felt sick; Unkar Plutt had put her in one for over a year when he had first bought her, every time she had tried to run away it had zapped her till she passed out or was sick and he or one of his underlings would come and find her, adding a beating for good measure until she finally accepted she was never going to get away from him.

Her mind was still sluggish with whatever drug they had used on her, otherwise she would have recognised the feeling and not touched it. She shook her head at herself disgustedly, then wriggled back towards the dead man to awkwardly try and search through his clothing for anything she may be able to use.

But she felt the van slow to a stop and heard doors bang, they must have had a notification from the bloody collar.

One of the doors opened and she blinked in the daylight so much brighter than the inside of the van. It was one of the same men that had taken her, a dart in his hand.

She mustered a glare, it was weak but it would do for now. “Is that really necessary?” She asked, voice rough from thirst.

His expression barely changed, “Plutt said you’d be trouble.” He said as he grabbed her by the hair and thrust the dart into her neck.

She had time for a snarl before he released her and banged the van door shut. She fought the drug, now her body had caught up on sleep she was able to keep it at bay long enough to weakly probe the bond. It had diminished, a whisper compared to what it had been, and it made her afraid, _was Kylo hurt? Or was it merely the growing distance between them?_ Those were her last thoughts before she sunk once more into oblivion.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

They’d hit a snag in their plans. None of them knew how to drive. It would be impossible to use public transport with the weapons they were taking with them and it would make them easier to track if the police were sent to get them back.

They were sitting trying to rack their brains for a solution when someone knocked on Kylo’s door. They all looked at each other suspiciously before hurriedly throwing a duvet over the scattered weapons and Zainmar thrust the copies of Rey’s files down his top, before Kylo opened the door slightly to see who was there.

It was Poe and Finn. Finn looked exhausted, his wide eyes bloodshot. “What happened to Rey?” He asked without preamble, “No one will tell me anything, not even Mara. _Please, I need to know.”_ He sounded desperate, squeezing Poe’s hand in his as he stared at Kylo.

He ought to turn them away, the more people who knew, the more chance this could go wrong. But Kylo couldn’t deny Rey and Finn’s relationship, it would be wrong. He sighed, “Come in.”

He opened the door fully, stepping back as Finn and Poe hesitantly entered, then he shut and locked the door again.

He sat back down on his bed and gestured to empty spots on the floor, waiting till they were seated before he spoke. “Rey’s gone. She was taken yesterday afternoon, probably by the men that started the library fire.”

“But, but,” Finn swallowed thickly, _“How?”_ Poe moved closer to him and pulled him against him as Finn continued to look at Kylo.

“They threatened Leia, probably told Rey they’d harm her if Rey didn’t do as she was told. We don’t know for certain… But, we are going to get her back, I _promise,_ Finn. We will get her back.”

“Won’t the police do that?” Poe asked, frowning.

Finn snorted and looked at Poe, and in a bitter tone said, “Of course not. No one gives a shit about orphans.” He looked intently up at Kylo, “What’s the plan?”

Kylo frowned and looked at the Knights, Ingalan shrugged, “So long as we can trust them not to dob us in, they may be able to help with a few things.” Kylo nodded and looked back at Finn and Poe. Finn he was certain wouldn’t squeal, Poe on the other hand…

“I swear I won’t tell.” Poe said, as if he knew what Kylo was thinking, and Finn nodded emphatically.

“Okay; we’re leaving tonight, while the dance is on, so people are preoccupied-”

Finn cut him off, shaking his head as he said, “They cancelled the dance, the school is on lock down. We’re being allowed to go to the refectory and gym, but not allowed around the front of the school or out of it, no firepit either.”

“Shit.” Zainmar said. “We’ll need to create some sort of diversion.”

Kylo frustratedly ran his hands through his hair, “Okay, so, yeah. We now need a diversion, or we just leave much later than we planned. We’re going to head to Jakku, I know in what direction they are headed and when we get closer I should be able to find exactly where she is… We were planning on borrowing Han’s van, but need to think of something else because none of us know how to drive.”

“I can.” Poe said, they all looked at him and he shrugged. “My dad taught me a few years ago. I can do it, no problem.”

“I’m coming too.” Finn said, Kylo raised his eyebrows but he carried on. “You’ll need someone with you who isn’t an entitled rich boy; no offense, but have any of you ever been somewhere that wasn’t a five star resort?”

“He has a point.” Javiell said. “The more we are able to blend in, the better chance we have of making this work.”

Kylo nodded, “Okay, but that is it. Just the seven of us.” Everyone nodded agreement.

“How are we going to take Han’s van though? I mean, that’s stealing and I have no idea how to hotwire a car.” Poe said.

Kylo shifted uneasily, “I know where he keeps the spare keys.” Before Finn or Poe could ask anything else he carried on. “We need to get food and water to take with us. We’re going to take our fencing blacks as they offer some protection, as well as our sabres and some knives we got from Rey’s room. I guess we also need to include clothing that will be good for hotter weather too. Plus any credits you have.”

“Okay.” Finn said, “Can I suggest any clothes you take be your oldest and scruffiest? It will be easier to blend in if you look like you belong there. And take the sabres, but you may find you get odd looks if you wear them out.”

“It may be good to nap this afternoon, too. It will probably be a long night, I guess we’ll need to cover as much ground as possible before it’s noticed we are missing.” Poe added.

“Makes sense.” Kylo agreed. “There is something else you should know… The man who Leia was held hostage by was carrying a gun, I will understand if that makes you change your mind about coming with us.”

Finn and Poe looked at each other, Poe squeezed Finn’s hand but nodded, face tight but determined. “We’re going.” Finn said. “I may even be able to get hold of some guns. I know a guy.”

Javiell laughed and Kylo blinked in surprise. Finn shrugged at their shocked looks, “I used to run with a bad crowd and I know my way around a gun. If we have enough credits, one or two will come in handy. And Poe has shooting experience too.” Poe just nodded.

“Okay, then. We need to be as circumspect as we can. So after you leave my room, let’s not talk about this unless it’s strictly necessary. The alarm on the dorm door has been disabled, so that won’t be a problem later, the hard part will be avoiding Mara and Stold. Without the dance, we’ll probably have to leave about 1am.” Kylo looked at Finn and Poe. “If you two want to leave your bags in here so the others in your dorm aren’t suspicious, you can. We’ll meet you on the stairs. All clear?”

Everyone nodded. Kylo took a deep breath, “You all know what to do. So let’s go get breakfast.”

  


After eating breakfast Kylo went to see Han. Ostensibly to ask him how Leia was doing, but also so he could pocket the spare keys to Han’s much repaired and modified van, which he fondly referred to as the Falcon.

It turned out to be very good timing; Leia and Luke were in the workshop too, sipping coffee on Han’s battered sofa while Chewie sulked on the floor because there was no room for him up on the sofa.

The Knights were currently breaking into the weapons cupboard, so the longer Kylo could keep Luke with him, the better. And as it was, there were some things he very much wanted to know.

“Any news?” He asked as he settled on the floor with Chewie. Han handed him a beer, giving Leia a firm look when she opened her mouth to protest. She sent him an icy one back but did not protest.

“Nothing so far, Ben. The police are looking over her room now and are following up some leads they have on the men. I promise you will know as soon as we do if she is found.” Luke said gently.

Kylo sighed and nodded then looked at his mother, “And you? How are you today?”

Leia grimaced, “A bad headache and worn out but it’s nothing serious, I am… angry with myself though. I am so sorry this happened, Ben.”

Chewie put his head on Kylo’s knee and looked up at him with soft, understanding eyes as Kylo pulled his ears. “It’s not your fault, Mum. There was nothing you could do.” He said quietly while keeping his eyes on Chewie.

There was silence for a while, then Han said gruffly, “Did you sleep? Have you felt anything through your… bond thing?”

“Nothing.” Kylo said, “But I can still feel her, barely, but she is still alive at least… I slept a bit. Might try for a nap later.” He looked up at Leia and Luke. “You owe me some answers and I need any distraction I can find. Tell me about my grandfather.”

The twins looked at each other, Kylo was sure there was some kind of communication between them before Leia nodded and they both looked back at Kylo.

“This is not a happy tale, Ben. But I suppose you have a right to know it… Your grandfather, Anakin, developed similar traits to you and Rey when he met our mother Padmé.” Leia said and Kylo settled back against the wall, watching her face cloud with sadness as she continued. “It was more one sided than you and Rey, the majority of their abilities seemed to only manifest in Anakin, but they both had telepathy. They were married only three years when our Mother died giving birth to us… Our father was not the same, the powers he had developed when he had met our mother disappeared and it drove him mad, a darkness seemed to consume him. He was admitted to a secure hospital, where he died a few years before you were born, he never regained himself. We did visit him from time to time, but he never knew us.” There were tears falling from her eyes now, her hand held tightly in Luke’s, whose eyes shone bright with emotion.

Kylo was silent. He took a long pull from his beer and wished it were something stronger. _Would that happen to him or Rey? If one of them died would the other go mad?_ An awful certainty descended on him, if Rey died, he would not long survive her... this begged the question - _Why,_ if they knew how important a bond was, _why were his parents not allowing him to go after her?_ This confirmed that he was right to do so, life without Rey would be no life at all.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I’ve posted a oneshot [Link Demon Speeding](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14534784) It is with Kylo and Rey from this story but not completely in sync with the timeline. It’s a nice dose of happy, if you need it.
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee)  
> is my Beta ♥
> 
> I am going on holiday in a couple of weeks, I won’t have access to the internet or anything to write on, so there is going to be a large gap in posting. Sorry! (But yay! First holiday in several years!)
> 
> Songs:  
> ~Perpetual by VNV Nation  
> ~Starlight by Muse  
> ~Anywhere in the Galaxy by Gamma Ray


	67. Looking At Life Through The Eyes Of A Tire Hub

Luke carried on speaking when it became evident Leia was unable to. “We were brought up by the man you knew as Uncle Ben and his wife, Breha. Ben was Anakin’s best friend and it was he who you were named after... You mother and I, our connection is minimal, if we are close, like now, we can communicate to some degree, but not with the clarity you and Rey seem to have. We can sense each other to some extent and sense danger if we are close enough… I think you and Rey may be more powerful than even our father was, perhaps because you share an equal amount of power, I don’t know. What I do know, is that if the wrong people were to learn about what you have, it will lead to trouble. Keep this secret, and keep it safe.”

Kylo frowned as he looked up at the twins, “Why was I never told any of this?”

Leia took a deep breath, visibly calming herself before answering him, “We had hoped you would never need to know, I was afraid that if you did, you would seek it out. After what it did to your grandfather... I couldn’t bare the thought of the same happening to you… Perhaps I was wrong, if you had known… Well, that water is well away under the bridge now.”

Kylo pushed his anger aside and down, she was right, it didn’t matter now, it didn’t change his current situation,a thought occurred to him and he cleared his throat, “Do any of you know about the mysterious patron who brought Rey here? Could her kidnap have something to do with them?”

Luke and Han shook their heads and Leia’s lips thinned, “No. All we know is that whoever it was resided in Canto Bight, or at least, their solicitors do.” Leia’s tone was vexed, she hated not knowing things. “It was a legacy in a will, so I think we can safely assume whoever it was is now dead. Though they may have family alive. It is an interesting thought though, Ben, and I will pass it on to the police, they haven’t yet asked about how Rey was able to start school here when she came from Jakku.” Leia paused and then muttered almost to herself, “I may do some digging of my own though, we need to know if this is connected.”

Kylo was just opening his mouth to reply when _he felt Rey_ . He gasped, closing his eyes to better concentrate on her, _ <REY!> _ He didn’t think she could hear him, and if she was saying anything back, he couldn’t hear her, but he could _feel her._ Her presence faded fast as she lost consciousness again, a small spike of fear and worry reached him as she was swallowed by darkness. But it was still something, it was still a connection, and he was grateful for it.

“Ben?”

Kylo opened his eyes to see his Mother on the floor with him, hands on his shoulders, he gave her a weak smile, “She was there, for a moment; I think they are keeping her sedated, and she couldn’t hear me, but I could feel her.”

Leia sat back on her heels, “Well, that is something at least… I will go and speak to the police about the possible connection to her patron, now.” She turned to fix a stare at at Han, “And no more beer.” She kissed Kylo lightly on the cheek and stood. “I will come and see you this evening to let you know how the investigation is progressing and to see how you are.” She told him before gliding out, seemingly serene as a swan.

Kylo sighed heavily and finished his beer, then pulled Chewie into his arms for a proper cuddle, Chewie grinned at him and laid a long slick up the scarred side of his face. “Ugh, really Chewbacca?” Chewie stared back at him happily and Kylo couldn’t help smiling back. _I’m going to find her, you know old friend. I will find her._ Chewie’s tail thumped as if he approved of this. _I’m going tonight, so distract Han, will you?_ Chewie yawned, then sneezed. Kylo decided he’d take it.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey awoke to darkness, it must be night outside. The van wasn’t moving. Was this a rest break or something else? Speaking of rest breaks, she needed one, urgently, and the dead man was starting to smell.

She noticed the change in air temperature, they must be going south then, and had probably come quite a long way by now. _Were they taking her back to Jakku? Back to Plutt?_ It didn’t make sense, Plutt hadn’t given her up, he’d been paid. It didn’t add up. She frowned, then wriggled to the side of the van and kicked it as hard as she could with her ankles bound and her dead limbs tingling. She repeated this a few times, till finally she heard one of the back doors of the van open and she looked up. Before they could stick her with a dart again she said quickly, “I need to pee. Badly. And this guy is starting to smell.”

There was a pause as the man silhouetted against the night sky regarded her. Finally he said, “Very well, but if you cause any trouble, I will kneecap you. Do you understand?”

Rey grimaced but nodded, “Yeah.”

He leaned into the van and pulled her by the back of her hoodie towards him, turning her so he could undo her ankles. She briefly wondered about kicking him in the chest but her legs were barely functional and it would almost definitely lead to her losing her knees. And knees were useful things to have. So she stayed obedient for now, _keep your knees today and carefully plan an escape for tomorrow._

“If you go further than twenty feet from where I am, the collar will shock you. It will incapacitate you as well as make me angry, so I would not advise it. You have three minutes.”

Rey stumbled away from him to a scrubby looking bush that would be the only decent screen from prying eyes. It was awkward with her hands tied but she managed somehow and then slowly made her way back to the van, taking in her surroundings as much as possible.

The land that surrounded them was wasteland, barren and cracked, not yet desert but no good for anything either. She could see the other man pacing back and forth in front of the van, talking quietly on a phone. The road the van was stopped by was empty, a minor road then, narrow and twisting, badly maintained. Did this mean they were being followed? Or was this just a precaution?

“Could I have some water and maybe some food?” She asked when she got close enough; she wondered about asking for her hoodie to be taken off but decided to stick with what was most important for now, in her experience too many requests meant none would be granted.

The man nodded, “Sit on the floor and I’ll get you something.” He said, voice flat, then walked to the front of the van.

Rey sat on the gravel by the road. The man was back quickly, dropping a water bottle and a sandwich in a container into her lap, before turning to pull the body out of the van and drag it away.

Rey drank a little water then started eating, trying not to gobble it too quickly. She casually studied the sandwich container. The label indicated it was from a onestop, the address was in Saleucami but judging by the state of the sandwich, it had been picked up quite a while ago… Rey frowned to herself, she vaguely knew where Saleucami was and it was not the quickest or straightest way to Jakku.

The man came back a short while later, “Up, back in the van.” And he grabbed her by her hood again, she managed to get her legs underneath her before she choked.

To her relief the ankle restraints stayed off, and she’d kept hold of her half full water bottle. The darkness of the back of the van was hot and still smelled of the dead man, but at least Rey could sit up, at least she had water and at least she was able to pull her hood around and filter the fetid air through it.

As the van began to move again she tried contacting Kylo. Now she was awake and fully alert, she could feel him more clearly, he still couldn’t seem to hear her but just knowing he was still there was comforting. She felt his awareness of her lucidity spike through the bond, and she couldn’t help a small smile curving her dry lips.

When it became clear that no amount of pushing was going to let him hear her, she gave up and took inventory.

There was not much, she just had her clothing, boots, belt, water bottle and one grip-pin. Still, she was a scavenger, so she set to work fumbling about in the darkness as quietly as she could, hoping to find something useful.

Rey’s search didn’t bare much fruit, she found some scraps of cloth, food packets and a small, sharp piece of metal, which she cut her finger on. That at least went in her pocket with the grip-pin.

Her best finds were two holes. One that gave her a way to vaguely hear what was being said in the front of the van, and the other one by the back left wheel. She could see outside, now it was dark she saw could see nothing, but come daylight she may be able to glimpse road signs or town names.

For now, she settled down and lay with her ear against the hole that led to the front. Her captors weren’t talkative, but she may glean something and she had nothing better to do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

They were eating dinner when Kylo felt Rey again, despite the proximity of others, Kylo shut his eyes, breathing carefully as he tried to reach her. She felt more alert, clearly fully awake and not sleepy.

But they were still unable to hear each other. He wished his grandfather were around to ask about things like this.

Rey felt fairly calm, but then she could be calm at the oddest of moments, there was determination mixed in with frustration. There was no obvious pain or fear.

He sighed to himself and opened his eyes, everyone was looking at him. _Shit._ “What?” He asked the table in general. The Knights, Poe and Finn stayed silent. “You looked weird. Are you okay?” Jess asked.

Kylo grimaced and shook his head, “Just tired and worried about Rey.” Jess’s mouth turned down at the corners and the other two girls started crying again, though quietly.

No teacher or scout had officially volunteered the information that Rey had been taken, but it had been all over school by lunchtime. You couldn’t keep a lid on that kind of incident.

The people who knew her were upset, everyone else was ridiculously excited and he’d been glaring all day at anyone who in his presence mentioned anything to do with what happened yesterday.

As they walked back to the dorm after their meal, the Knights lagged behind the rest so they could talk.

“Did she wake up?” Ingalan asked softly. “Were you able to talk?”

“She is awake. We can’t seem to hear each other but she is completely lucid and appears to be unharmed. At least, I can feel no pain and I don’t think she has walls up at the moment.” Kylo answered.

“Well that’s sort of good news, I guess.” Zainmar said.

“I have a credit card of my Dad’s.” Leonmar said with a small but wicked smile. “We can withdraw as much as we can before we leave the city, otherwise it will show anyone who looks where we are headed, but it should help with buying g-u-n-s.”

Javiell snorted, “No one can hear us, and if they could, they’d work out what that spells in a few seconds.” Leonmar just shrugged.

“So, in the efforts of keeping up appearances, shall we go play Halo?” Ingalan said as they reached the dorm door.

Kylo nodded. “Sounds like a plan.”

As was the Knights custom, they kicked the year elevens off the console and sofas they wanted and settled down to play.

Leia came and found Kylo not long afterwards. She gave him a pained smile as he looked up when her hand touched his shoulder. “Nothing as yet, I’m afraid… Kylo.” She grimaced as she said his nom de guerre, she had never liked his choice.

Kylo feigned disappointment, he hadn’t really expected anything after all. “She is awake now and has been for about an hour. We still can’t talk to each other, but I can’t detect any pain.” He said softly.

Leia nodded, “Well, that is something. Thank you for telling me. I will see you tomorrow morning then.”

Kylo felt a stab of guilt but ignored it, “Good night.” He said, not agreeing about seeing her in the morning felt like he wasn’t lying to her. And strictly speaking, he wasn’t. But it felt like he was.

 

Javiell and Leonmar were in Kylo’s room playing cards when someone knocked on his door. Ingalan and Zainmar were sleeping but they wouldn’t have knocked to come in - they knew Kylo had left it unlocked it this evening. And Finn and Poe were going to meet them later.

Before Kylo could answer, Hux opened the door and slipped inside, shutting it behind him. Kylo growled as he stood, “What the fuck are you-”

Hux cut him off, “Shut up, and just hear me out.” He snapped, “ _I’m going with you._ I take it you are leaving tonight? I can get us guns and as many credits as we need.”

There was a pause as Kylo, Javiell and Leonmar stared at him with opened mouthed astonishment. Hux smiled thinly. “I have my uses, and good connections. You were right, the police have not made finding Rey a high priority.”

Kylo’s mind started working over time, easy access to weapons, (without going through Finn’s more than dubious sounding contact), would be good. Likewise, the cash would help too, they had a long way to go, and possibly would end up needing bribes; anything that would help get him to Rey faster could only be good; but... _With Hux? Could he really work with Hux? Could Hux be trusted? And what on earth would Rey think of him if he turned up to rescue her with fucking Hux in tow?_

But with Hux... with what Hux had to offer, it might mean it more likely they could get to her in time, he felt like there was a clock counting down in his head but he had no idea when it would stop.

He took a deep calming breath, let it out, took another. “Fine. But just you, no one else.”

Leonmar gave a shocked squawk but Javiell remained silent, a considering look on his face.

“Fine.” Hux agreed. “What’s the plan?”

Kylo studied him, “Before we give you details, I want you to understand that if you cross me, if you delay our journey, if you report us to a teacher, I will make you pay. Horribly, and damn the consequences, is that clear?”

Hux sneered, “Crystal.” He folded his arms. “Now, when do we leave?”

Kylo glanced at Javiell and Leonmar, Leonmar shrugged, and Javiell flicked his eyes away from Hux long enough to give Kylo a small nod before returning them to Hux.

“We are meeting Finn and Poe on the staircase at 1am-” Kylo paused to glare at Hux who’d made a derisive sound at the mention of Poe and Finn, but Hux waved him on. “Dress in dark clothing but have a bag with spares that would suit a hotter climate; anything old and scruffy you may have would be best. We’re taking our fencing blacks, you may want to at least bring your fencing jacket as it will provide some protection… It’s too late for you to get food or water, so I guess you can share ours.”

Hux nodded, “How are we getting past the alarm on the dorm door?”

Kylo shot him a slightly smug smile, “That’s been taken care of. All you need to know is when to meet us. After that, you’ll just have to trust us, as we are doing with _you_ now.”

Hux nodded tightly and put his hand on the door, “I’ll see you later then.” And without a backwards glance, he left.

There was a pause as they listened to make sure Hux was gone, “Well, _shit._ ” Leonmar said. “Are you sure we can trust him? I mean, it’s _fucking Hux.”_

Kylo sighed, “Of course we can’t trust him; but real weapons and extra credits will give us an edge we sorely need. We can always ditch him somewhere inhospitable if we get sick of him.”

“And if he double crosses us?” Javiell asked, “What then?”

“Then, we kill him.” Kylo said it softly, but with conviction. Javiell smiled.

“Well, on that bombshell, it’d probably be a good idea to get some sleep.” Leonmar said as he stood. “I’ll see you at 00.55.”

Javiell left too and Kylo settled down with his alarm in hand. It was set to vibrate rather than ring so it wouldn’t disturb anyone in the floor below.

Despite his nerves, sleep found him, and with it, dreams of Rey.

  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Chapter title is taken from "Toxicity" by System Of A Down (because reasons). (Also, yeah…. Top Gear ref just happened. I’m not even sorry.)
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	68. Dovie’andi Se Tovya Sagain

 

Kylo found himself in an austere black and grey room, the only real colour were the various red lights on the medical paraphernalia in what must be a med bay room. He was seated while a small droid attended to the wound on his face, meticulously knitting his skin together. The wound dream-Rey had given him. _This is a dream._

He felt a disturbance, an insistent tugging seemed to suck the sounds out of the room and dream-Kylo waved the small droid away as he tried to focus on whatever was causing it. But Kylo knew, with a shock, he realised he was feeling something akin to the bond he and Rey shared. It was that tugging sensation. He looked around slowly, and there was Rey. It was her, somehow suddenly in the same room as he… _or was she?_ She looked as shocked as dream-Kylo was as they regarded each other. All Kylo could think was that she looked okay, unhurt… Yet, this wasn’t his Rey, and he felt his heart drop down into his stomach… But did that mean his Rey was inside? A passenger like he was?

Dream-Rey recovered faster from her surprise, faster than dream-Kylo did, she grabbed a blaster and fired it right at his chest. He reacted too slowly and his body jerked as the bolt hit him. He gasped, breath stuttering... yet he was unharmed, there was no wound, nothing, and Rey was gone. _This is a dream._

He stood slowly, still reeling from finding no hole in his chest, from seeing _her_ … But where had she gone? There was no one but he and the droids in the med room, he left the rit and rushed out into a long desolate grey corridor, almost slipping in his haste, but he only saw two low ranking personnel aides and a small droid, otherwise the corridor was empty.Then he felt it again, that tug, that disturbance, _the bond_ , he turned, and there she was, standing, face defiant, angry. _This is a dream._

He thrust his hand out, layering command into his voice as he demanded, ”You will bring Luke Skywalker to me.”

**~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~**

 

Rey blinked in confusion as she realised dream-Kylo was gone, like he had never been there, and instead there was a round hole burned through the stonework wall of the hut from her blaster. _This is a dream._

She ran out of the hut to find herself on a steep hill, there were other huts nestled closely around, and there was water, so much water! Was this the sea? Focus! _This is a dream._

Rey went fifteen paces up the hill so she could look all around her, there was nothing… yet a moment later, she felt that pull again, _the bond,_ and there he was, standing now, as he gazed at her. Rey glared back - he was completely unharmed. This wasn’t her Kylo. This one was evil. _She remembered._

He flung out his hand,”You will bring Luke Skywalker to me.” It was said in a arrogant commanding voice. She was unmoved, if he was trying to use his power on her, it wasn’t working. He dropped his arm, a slight expression of chagrin tinging his features, marred now by a scar, so like her Kylo’s and she remembered hers telling her she had given it to his dream version too. _This is a dream._

He studied her for a few seconds before saying, “You’re not doing this, the effort would kill you.” She didn’t answer, she wasn’t sure what he meant, so she tried to calm her breathing, tried to calm her erratic heart beat. He turned to look behind him, “You can’t see my surroundings can you?” Rey spoke over him, despising the almost relaxed tone of his voice, “You’re going to pay for what you did!” She wasn’t sure what she meant by that, and to her fury, he ignored her and continued speaking as if she hadn’t, “I can’t see yours.” He paused and then added, “Just you.” It still surprised her, how young he could seem, how… ordinary, how like her Kylo... She hated him, so much it made her blood boil. He carried on, tone curious, as if he were oblivious to her murderous gaze. “No, this is something else.” Inside Rey scoffed, he didn’t know of the bond? Despite all his power, he did not know...The way he looked at her, what did that mean? It wasn’t hatred, it was almost… _soft._

A door banged behind her and she started, turning to see Luke’s door open. _Luke?_ Did he know? Could he see Ren too? She turned back to look at the monster. “Luke?” Ren asked her, as if they weren’t enemies, as if this was normal. Rey turned back, sure by now Luke could see Ren, nervous of his reaction. _This is a dream._

But there wasn’t one, Luke appeared unaware, “What’s that about?” He asked as he pointed to the hole her blaster had made, and when Rey turned back, Kylo Ren was gone. _This is a dream._

Instead there were two very angry, indignant... fish-creatures? Trying to fix the hole she had made in the hut. As she looked around, she found quite a few others glaring at her too. This was not going well.

She paused before answering Luke, unsure what to tell him. Something in her feared that if he knew she had seen Kylo Ren, Luke wouldn’t trust her, would think she were mad, or dark and there would be no way that he would train her, or leave with her to help The Resistance, and she could not fail Leia, or Finn… _wait, Leia was here too?_

Her dream self looked at the stones instead of Luke as she lied to him, “I was cleaning my blaster and it went off.” _This is a dream._

Luke gave her a look, then dipped his head in a brief nod, “Let’s get started.” He turned and started up the hill. _Started on what?_

Rey glanced around at the angry fish-creatures, before starting after him. _This is a dream…._

And then Rey was sucked away from the world, and into darkness.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

As Rey turned away from him, to look back at what his dream-self suspected was Luke, Kylo was sucked away from her into darkness.

He floated, suspended in nothingness as he thought over what he had just witnessed. His and Rey’s dream-selves seemed to only now be connecting, discovering their bond. He began to wonder about them, _were these just dreams?_ No. This was something more, everything seemed so real, so detailed… _Could they be real?_ Could they be from the future or another universe somehow? His musing was cut short as he felt Rey’s presence shine in the darkness.

_ <REY!> _ He surged towards her and could feel her do the same, as if they were two magnets, one north and one south. _ <Kylo!> _ They collided, their essences melded, entwined. _ <Were you there too?> _ Rey asked as their bond hummed at the blending of their beings. _ <Yes, but that doesn’t matter, Rey! Stars, are you alright? I haven’t been able to hear you!> _

_ <I know, I can’t hear you either. But I can still feel you even though it’s weak.> _

_ <Hold on. We are coming for you.> _

He felt a surge of alarm from her, _ <No! You mustn’t! It’s too dangerous, I’ll work out how to get free on my own.> _

If he had hands where they were, he would have thrown them up in the air in frustration, _ <There is no way I am not coming for you. There is nothing you can say to stop me, Rey, I love you, how could you think I would abandon you? I won’t. Not ever. I will find you. I promise.> _

He could feel her probe their connection, feel her resignation as she realised there really was nothing she could say that would stop him. _ <Okay, but I’m not sure where I am being taken, or who is behind it.> _

Kylo would have frowned, if he could, _ <Don’t you think it’s Plutt? Aren’t you going to Jakku?> _

Her frustration filtered through to him, _ <No, and I’m pretty sure we aren’t headed to Jakku, if we are, we are going the long way around, I know we’ve been through Saleucami, but that is it…> _ He frowned in confusion, then she brushed his mind tentatively, _ <Kylo, is Leia alive?> _

His heart hurt, _ <Yes, she is fine, thanks to you… Rey, why didn’t you call me? Why didn’t you use the bond?> _

He felt relief flood through her, _ <I wasn’t sure he would let her live… Kylo, I couldn’t, I couldn’t call you, he would have killed her. He had a gun against her head, if I had done anything other than what I was told, Leia would be dead, possibly you and I would be too. I had no choice.> _

Kylo felt a wave of guilt, _ <I’m so sorry, I should have been there with you, I should have protected you.> _

He felt a wave of warmth hit him, _ <He would have just killed you, Kylo… It doesn’t matter now, it is done.> _

Another thought occurred to him, _ <Chewie found blood, we followed your trail out to the side road and there was blood, it wasn’t yours was it?> _ He didn’t doubt the dog but he had to ask, just in case.

_ <No. There was another man, not one of the two who are with me now. I can’t be sure, but I think the guy who was with me at the time shot him because he said the guy’s name. He killed him, they only just got rid of the body.> _ There was a shudder of revulsion through her, _ <I woke up with him in the back of a van. We are currently driving through some badlands on a small back country road. It’s a black box van, its windows are tinted, and I am knifeless.> _

Rey didn’t appear to be horrified by the fact she had seen a man killed, then woken up with his body, just disgusted. Kylo tried hard to focus on what was important, not let his horror cloud his thoughts. _ <What was the name?> _

_ <Boba> _ Rey said, _ <The two men I am with are twins or almost identical brothers, I haven’t yet heard either one use names. Just the dead guy...> _ She trailed off, then, _ <Kylo? I think somethings happe-> _

Kylo’s alarm buzzed in his hand and his eyes flew open. _Fuck!_ He reached for the bond, followed the trail to Rey, but her mind was still dark. He really hoped this meant they now were able to talk again.

He felt relief surge through him as he sat up, she was alive and as well as could be expected, and he knew some details. Saleucami? He’d have to check the map in the Falcon.

Speaking of which, it was time to go.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Kylo was sucked away from Rey; something must have pulled him out of sleep. Rey floated alone for a while. It was odd, being so aware of being asleep, yet not unpleasant. Her thoughts turned back to their shared dream, _what had it meant?_ Their dream doubles hadn’t seemed to understand about the bond. Yet she was certain it had formed in their last shared dream… It was confusing; it had felt so real, so solid and detailed… and Luke had been there. _What did it all mean?_ She thought back to the island and the sea, the sea! It had been so beautiful, so vast… She hoped her dream self stayed there for a while, she wouldn’t mind seeing it again… Had she and Kylo connected because of the dream? It seemed to make sense, but it hadn’t happened in their last shared dream, though perhaps that had been because neither had known the other was there.

_Stars,_ now her Kylo was coming after her. She wished she could have thought of a way to stop him, on one level it made her feel warm with relief and hope but on another, deeper level, the idea of him leaving his Canto Bight life behind him, terrified her… He was about to enter a very different world, and she desperately hoped it was not going to be like leading a lamb to the slaughter.

Either way, this meant it was even more important for her to escape herself, hopefully after working out who the was behind this… _Boba,_ where had she… **OH. SHIT.**

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo opened his door to find the Knights outside. He had two bags of his own so he handed Finn’s to Ingalan and Poe’s to Leonmar.

They didn’t talk, just nodded to him as he silently shut his door and they moved down the stairs quietly to find Hux waiting, impatience on his face. But he fell in behind them, keeping silent as they descended. Which was probably a good thing, because Finn and Poe didn’t notice his presence at first. Knowing Finn, he wouldn’t have been able to keep his mouth shut if he had. Javiell and Zainmar were blocking Hux, as if they had thought the same.

Once they were a few steps from the bottom, Leonmar went ahead, to check it was clear before coming back and waving them on.

Kylo was aware of his pulse jumping in his throat, if they were caught now, he may never get a chance to leave, he wouldn't put it past his Mother and Luke to lock him in a cupboard.

In this toss of the dice, it appeared that luck favoured them; they made it to the outside door without a hitch, the alarm was still dead and then they were outside, the cold air stinging his cheeks as they moved quickly away from the dorm.

They made it to the first lot of trees before they paused and Finn noticed Hux. Finn’s eyes went wide and furious and Ingalan got his hand over the other boy’s mouth to muffle his outraged voice just in time. Hux didn’t help things by smirking at him.

Kylo stepped into Finn’s view, blocking him from Hux. “I don’t like it either, but he will be useful,” he said quietly, “Now. You need to be silent, everyone does. When we get to the van, we need to roll it down the hill a ways so the engine doesn’t wake Han. We need to work together and we need to be silent. Seriously, if you can’t be quiet, I will make you. Nod if you understand, that goes for Poe and Hux too.”

Finn glared at him for a moment, then flicked his eyes to Poe, Poe shrugged, and gestured at Finn as if to say it was up to him. Finn looked back at Kylo, then stiffly nodded and Ingalan took his hand away and stepped back. Poe also nodded and Kylo turned to Hux.

Hux sneered but dipped his head in the barest of nods. “Good. Now follow us, stick to the shadows. If I hold up my fist, you freeze, understood?” More nods. “Okay, let’s do this.”

And they set off, Kylo felt a sense of déjà vu, this was so like Wednesday night, with Rey. It seemed like weeks ago, not days… He shook himself, he needed to have a clear head.  

Thankfully the night was dark, clouds blotting out the stars and miraculously Hux, Poe and Finn didn’t make too much noise.

They made it to the workshop easily, and there was the Falcon, sitting in the small car park that the workshop opened onto.

The Falcon was a 4x4 crew van that Han was endlessly modifying. It looked old and decrepit, but Kylo knew it was anything but.

He opened the back doors as quietly as he could and put his bags inside, gesturing for the others to do the same. Then he handed the key to Poe and motioned him to the driver's seat. Zainmar followed, then let the rest of them know when Poe was ready, and they started pushing the van. There was a slight downward slope to the road which helped them, but by the time Kylo deemed it safe to stop pushing and turn the engine on, they were all breathing hard and sweating.

There were three seats in the front and Kylo got in with Finn, it would probably be a good idea to keep he and Hux apart for a while.

The others got in the back, Poe turned on the headlights and they were off. It was a slightly wobbly start, but Poe quickly got used to the van and they sped off into the night.

The bond indicated that Rey was still asleep, but Kylo sent his thoughts to her anyway, _ <I am coming, Rey, I will find you.> _

_**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~** _

  
_Don't know why I feel this way, have I dreamt this time, this place?_  
 _Something vivid comes again into my mind_  
 _And I think I've seen your face, seen this room, been in this place_  
 _Something vivid comes again into my mind_  
  
_Think I've heard your voice before, think I've said these words before_  
 _Something makes me feel I just might lose my mind_  
 _Am I still inside my dream? Is this a new reality_  
 _Something makes me feel that I have lost my mind_  
  
_All my hopes and expectations, looking for an explanation_  
 _Coming to the realization that I can't see for sure_  
  
_The dream is true, the dream is true_  
 _The dream is true, the dream is true_  


_**~ Dream Of Mirrors by Iron Maiden** _

_**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	69. Operation Peanut

 

Rey came out of sleep with a horrified gasp. Her hands and arms were numb, lifeless, and her legs and back were cramping from the awkward position she had fallen asleep in. But none of that registered, because she finally _remembered_.

It was _Boba_ … _Boba_ and his twin brother _Jango._ She had never met them, but she’d heard the stories, knew their reputation. And she knew who they worked for.

_But what did they want with her?_  She was no one, _literally_ no one. She struggled to sit up, taking a drink from the bottle of now warm water as she thought.

They or one of their informants had either seen or spoken to Plutt because they had known of her brand… though, it had also been written in her medical files, so they hadn’t had to go through Plutt at all… But again, _why? What could one of the most notorious crime families want with the likes of her?_

Her mind kept going in circles till she had to squeeze her eyes shut; this was going nowhere. Then she remembered her dream and seeing Kylo afterwards and she excitedly probed the bond... but although Kylo was awake and the thread of their connection seemed stronger, he still couldn’t seem to hear her.

Rey shut her eyes, willing her frustrated, angry tears away; _tears are just a waste of salt_. They wouldn’t help her, she had to help herself.

She took another sip of water, grimacing over the painful tingling in her hands, then scooted across the floor and put her eye to the tiny hole that showed her the world outside.

The sun was up, it must be about 7am, they still seemed to be travelling on back roads, but the terrain was now dark jagged rock and little else, just shadow and dust.

After an hour or so, her vigilance paid off, as they waited at a junction, she caught sight of a road sign, _‘Sleheyron 5 miles’_ , they went in the opposite direction, but she cherished the knowledge all the same.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

When Poe got to the end of the school drive, he paused and turned to Kylo, “Left or right?”

Kylo blinked then focused, “Left,” He told Poe, then turned round to look behind him, “There is a map book somewhere back there, can one of you hand it over?”

The Knights started looking but Hux pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to Kylo, “I brought a Sat box,” he said, in an almost helpful tone.

The Knights stopped looking to raise their eyebrows and Kylo merely gave Hux a small nod before turning back around and turning it on.

It was new tech, and he found Saleucami quickly, Rey was right, it really was the wrong way for Jakku, he frowned as he stared at the screen.

Finn peered at the screen held in Kylo’s hands and echoed his frown, “What’s Saleucami got to do with anything?”

Kylo flicked his eyes backwards towards Hux then back at Finn, whose frown deepened, “I know Rey recently passed through there yesterday evening. It gives us a reference for now anyway.” He paused then looked back at Hux, “So, where do we pick up these weapons?”

Finn spoke before Hux could, “I thought I was getting us guns?” He glared over his shoulder at Hux, who merely smirked.

“My source is more reliable, _2187_.” Hux said in that silky voice of his.

Finn opened his mouth on what was obviously going to be an angry retort but Kylo spoke over him. “Shut up, both of you. If you are going to argue then I will duct tape your mouths shut and put you in the back, is that clear?”

Somewhere from the back seats, he heard Javiell and Zainmar suppress snorts of laughter, Kylo ignored them, looking at Finn, “Hux is able to get us anything we need, he also has an endless supply of credits. I don’t like it any more than you do, but he is here, _so long_ as he continues to be more useful than annoying.” He aimed that last bit over his shoulder, Hux glared at him but remained quiet.

“Fine,” Finn said in a surly voice, Poe reached over a comforting hand and squeezed his thigh, Finn patted his hand, seeming to settle down and Kylo attached the Sat box to the dash, then turned to Hux, “So? Where are we going?”

Hux’s lips thinned, “Oslumpex. It’s only about twenty five miles and we’re already going in the right direction.”

Poe frowned at that and without turning around asked, “Isn't that a military base?”

Hux nodded his head slightly, “It is. Like I told Ren, I have good connections.” It was a fairly cryptic reply but Kylo didn’t bother trying for more.

After a brief stop for Leonmar and Hux to withdraw credits, they reached Oslumpex quickly, the roads were almost devoid of traffic at this time of night and Hux directed Poe to the back entrance of the military base, along a little used mostly gravel side road.

“Stay in the van, the person I am going to see wishes to remain anonymous, once the transaction is completed I’ll need some help with the gear, but I will give you a signal.” And with that, he got out of the van and disappeared into the darkness.

As soon as he disappeared Finn rounded on Kylo, “What the hell is he even doing here?!”

Kylo glared back at him, “He worked out what was happening, if we’d left him behind, he may have dobbed us in. At the time, I thought we were going to Jakku and so did he. He has some uses and we can always dump him somewhere when he stops being useful.”

Finn gave an angry snort, “That still doesn’t explain _why_ he is here! Why the hell would he want to _help Rey?”_

Kylo sighed and rubbed his eyes, “I have no fucking idea.” He answered tiredly, then looked in the back as Ingalan touched him on the shoulder.

“Did you speak to her? Is that why we’re now heading to Saleucami?”

Kylo nodded, “Yeah, I didn’t want to say with Hux around. Rey doesn’t think Plutt is behind this; she says they passed through Saleucami yesterday evening, but is unsure of where their final destination is.”

“So does that mean you can talk normally again? I mean normally for you two?” Zainmar asked.

“I hope so, but I’m not sure, we spoke… while asleep, after sharing the same dream. I can’t test it now as she is still asleep.”

He glanced back to check out the windscreen for Hux and found Poe and Finn staring at him wide eyed.

“What?” He asked them, frowning.

“Well, it’s just that, we knew you were, telepathic and stuff but… what else can you do?” Poe asked.

Kylo grimaced, but a small nod from Ingalan made him answer, “Okay, but don’t mention this in front of Hux… We formed some kind of bond, we’re connected. I know where she is and vice versa, normally we can talk to each other but since she was taken away we can’t, I suppose it must be the distance, but I’m not sure. We’ve shared the same dream once before, and before that had weird dreams about each other, or entered each others dreams...” He hesitated then pointed to his scar, “She gave me this in a dream a week before she did in real life, she had no idea of that at the time, and it’s in the same place-”

Finn held up a hand, “Wait, hold on… It was _Rey_ that sliced your face?” He looked shocked but also faintly proud.

Oddly Kylo felt his lips quirk in a slight smile, “Of course it was, who else would it have been?”

Poe laughed and Finn smiled, eyes glittering as Kylo carried on, “We have some kind of… power between us - we can heal injuries,” again he gestured to his scar, “She healed this and I helped her recover faster after her fever… and I burned most of the drug out of her system when she had been spiked.” There was a ripple of angry emotion from everyone inside the van, but he pushed his own down, it wouldn’t be helpful right now, however righteous it was. “We also healed Chewie after he was injured during the library fire, though I had to wake her up for it to work, we seem to need to touch skin for it to happen - I can’t do it on my own. We can also sense danger, and sometimes other people, like when Rey knew where those kids were trapped in the library, I guess that’s it. But, you _cannot_ tell anyone, and I mean _anyone.”_

_“Well shit.”_ Finn said softly and Poe nodded, everyone was quiet for a while, then Finn said softly, “I remember her first dream of you, it really freaked her out,” then he grinned, “And she said you were wearing some kind of weird mask.”

In the back of the van Kylo heard snorts of laughter; he felt a little… cheated, that Finn knew the details. “Was that the one she had on Wednesday, when we were fighting with swords made of light?”

Finn nodded, “Yeah, but I think it was you kissing her that freaked her out more than the fight,” he smiled, “She couldn’t stop blushing after it.”

Kylo felt himself smile, so he had kissed her? That had been the cause of her blushing and jumpiness? He felt a trifle smug, despite the circumstances.

“How did you kiss her if you had a mask on?” Zainmar asked him.

Kylo shrugged, “I have no idea, she never told me that part, just that we were fighting.” He looked at Finn, who was now looking smug himself.

“She told me you won the fight and were about to kill her but instead you ripped your mask off and kissed her instead, then she woke up.”

“Kinky.” Leonmar said, Zainmar laughed.

_“Oh!_ I remember now, it was when we were watching the movie right? The bad but sexy dream that made her wake up yelling?” Poe asked Finn, who nodded.

Finn grinned as he looked at Kylo, “Guess at least you won one fight with her, even if it was a dream.”

“Oooo burn!” Zainmar said and Poe laughed.

Kylo glared, “And have any of you won against her? No? I thought not. And we’ve never fenced against each other, when we do, I _will_ win.”

Finn nodded sagely, trying to suppress a smirk as he said, “That’s right Kylo, keep telling yourself that.”

Kylo took a deep breath in, trying to keep a lid on his temper. It was fine when the Knights ribbed him, they were his brothers and that was allowed, and Rey of course, but when anyone else did it, the beast rattled the bars of its cage and his nerves were already frayed as it was.

He was distracted by Ingalan saying, “There’s Hux now.”

Kylo breathed out, “Ingalan, Jav, with me. The rest of you, stay inside and be ready to go, Poe turn the van around.”

He, Javiell and Ingalan got out and pulled their hoods up against the light rain that had started to fall. Once they reached Hux, he led them through an open gate in the barbed wire fence and around the back of a warehouse.

They found black plastic cases piled on top of each other and some canvas bags. There was no personal around, just Hux.

“We need to leave quickly. This isn’t a legitimate transaction and we don’t have a large window of time to get out of here unseen.” So saying, Hux shouldered two of the canvas bags and started back the way they had come.

Kylo and the others followed his lead, Hux’s ansty demeanor affecting them too, and they quickly caught up to him.

They had just finished loading the van, when there was a distant shout. “ _Shit!_ Get in!” Hux hissed.

They scrambled into the van and Hux snarled “ _Drive!_ ” at Poe, who obediently put his foot down.

They sped away with a spray of gravel, and once they reached tarmac, Poe floored it, he swore in surprise as the van responded with a roar. “ _Holy shit,_ this is a beast in sheep’s clothing.”

“Han made quite a few modifications.” Kylo said as he craned his head around for any signs of pursuit. “It looks like a hunk of junk but it’s faster than most other vehicles on the roads.”

If they were being pursued, they outran them, and after five miles or so, they slowed down.

“So, what did you get?” Zainmar asked Hux.

“A few things, handguns, a couple of assault rifles, some frag grenades, heat sensitive binoculars, ear comms, body armour and I may have a light man-portable A.S.W.”

There was a shocked silence, then Ingalan asked faintly, “An A.S.W? As in an anti-structure weapon?”

Kylo turned with Finn to look back at Hux, who gave them a thin lipped smile, “Yes. One of those. I thought it may come in handy.”

Finn swallowed, “You do realise Operation Peanut is a rescue mission and we are not starting a war, right?”

Hux glared at him, “Operation _what?”_

And Kylo remembered Finn didn’t know… _light!_ Things were so fucking complicated. “We don’t need a name, Finn, we just need to get it done.”

“What’s wrong with having a name?” Finn asked.

Hux narrowed his eyes, “Why _Peanut?_ Is it because she almost killed me? Is that it?”

Finn started to give Hux a derisive look then froze, “What did you just say?”

“ _Uh oh._ ” Zainmar said, “Guess that cat is out of the bag then.”

Finn’s eyes went wide and Poe kept flashing an identical look over his shoulder as he listened intently but tried to concentrate on driving.

“Guess she didn’t tell you that then.” Kylo said, somehow keeping the smugness out of his voice.

“It was _Rey?_ She gave Hux peanuts?” Finn asked him, Kylo was surprised by how shocked he seemed.

“Of course it was.” Javiell said, Kylo could hear the smile in his voice, he decided Rey may be a bad influence on his brother.

“Yes, Rey almost killed me. I thought it was fucking obvious. But if you didn’t know, why call this Operation Peanut?” Hux said icily.

Finn shrugged, “It’s what I call Rey, I gave her the nickname when… _Oh shit._ My bad.” Yet he was almost grinning now.

Pretty much everyone in the van asked, “What?”

Finn shrugged again, “When she beat up Hux and then passed out that time? I nicknamed her peanut, and told her about Hux being allergic to them.”

_“You light blinded fucktard!”_ Hux snarled as he leaned forward in his seat, but Javiell pulled him back, aided by Ingalan.

“Hux, most people know, if Finn hadn’t said anything, she could easily have heard it from someone else.” Kylo said as reasonably as he could as he suppressed his own amusement.

Hux glared but settled back in his seat and crossed his arms.

“How did she do it?” Finn asked and Hux shot him a filthy look.

“Maybe now is not the best time to discuss this.” Ingalan said diplomatically.

Kylo nodded, “We should try and rest while we can. Those of you in the back, try and sleep, we’ll rotate later.”

People settled down and the van became blessedly quiet as Poe drove them steadily on towards morning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

It must have been late morning when Rey felt the van slow down and eventually stop. She wriggled away from her spyhole and sat up, draining the water bottle before they opened the back door.

She couldn’t tell if it was Boba or Jango, but it probably didn’t matter. “I need to pee.” She said as the Twin looked at her.

He nodded, “I am going to take your cuffs off. But I want you to understand what will happen if you try anything-”

Before Rey could tell him that she knew what a shock collar did, he activated it, it was more painful than when she had touched it, a burning stab into her neck, making her body jerk and she grunted.

“That is merely a small taste of what will happen if you displease me, do you understand?”

Rey winced as she nodded and he pulled her wrists to him and undid the cuffs. She flexed her hands, noticing her wrists were rubbed raw and somewhat swollen.

“Get out.” The twin commanded and Rey did as quickly as she could, legs still rather unresponsive.

They were stopped on another side road, again they were the only people around; _what had he expected her to even do?_ There was nothing for miles… Not even a handy bush. _Fuck._ “Look, you got me in the collar, there’s nowhere I can go; can you, maybe turn your back for a moment, please?”

He gazed at her for a moment before grunting and turning his back slightly, not completely, but the implication was he wouldn’t look and this was probably the best she could hope for.

“You have three minutes.”

_Why three? It always seemed to be bloody three._ Rey stumbled away and took care of what was necessary - the relief was immense.

She stumbled back quickly and the twin turned back around, “Get in,” He gestured to the back of the van.

Rey nodded resignedly, “Could I have something to drink and maybe some food?” She asked as she got back in.

“In about an hour.” He said and shut the door.

Rey blinked in the sudden darkness, then moved over to the hole that opened into the front of the van and placed her ear against it as the van started to move again.

They stayed silent though and when Rey began to hear the sound of other traffic she switched holes hoping to catch sight of another road sign.

She got lucky just before the van stopped again, they passed a sign saying ‘Welcome to Huloon’.

As they pulled off the road she moved away from the hole, about five minutes later the door opened and another bottle of water and sandwich was thrown at her before the door closed again.

After eating and sipping a bit of water, Rey took off her hoodie, it was hot and getting hotter as the day progressed. The air in the back of the van was stifling and still smelled slightly of dead man.

She sat and thought as the van started moving again, irritably shifting her bra which was becoming uncomfortable- the wires were digging in somewhat and…

Rey grinned to herself and took off her bra excitedly, then pulled out the sharp piece of metal she had found yesterday. Working carefully she used the metal to cut into the bra and remove the underwires, silently thanking Jess for making her buy proper bras.

Once they were out, she put the bra back on, it probably looked strange but she hoped the Twins wouldn’t notice the difference.

Then she set to work using the sharp piece of metal to give one of the underwires an edge, it was rough work and she cut herself a few times, but she persevered till she had a rudimentary weapon.

Once she was done with that she took the other underwire and jammed it into the van door so she could bend it more easily. She used her hoodie to protect her hands and after a lot of effort and a great amount of cursing inside her head, she had managed to make the twists and turns she wanted.

When combined with the pin in her pocket and the scrap of metal, she should be able to get out of the van.

So, she had a way out, and a weapon, but the shock collar would be a problem… She could always try lifting the control from one of the Twin’s pockets, but she was sure they would notice; she was good, but not that good.

For now, she reinserted the sharp wire into her bra and wrapped the other in some of the cardboard that her sandwich had been in and shoved that inside her bra too.

The warm thick air slowly got to her and she allowed herself to lie down, head pillowed on her hoodie, she slid slowly into sleep as she lay with her ear pressed to the hole connecting to the cab.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥ and check out her beautiful new short [Here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14593653)


	70. Monster

Rey found herself standing on the bare rock at the foot of the steep green hill that was the island. _This is a dream._ It was raining heavily, so much that the air was grey and dark, the stormy sea crashing in waves against the rocky shore.

She was wearing a cape to protect her from the weather- she could be inside the Falcon, warm and dry, but the novelty of the rain and the sea had brought her outside.

It was beautiful, such a contrast to what she was used to, even as grey as it was, it made her heart sing a little as she walked underneath the partial shelter of the Falcon. _This is a dream._

She grinned as she stuck her hand into the runoff pouring down from a corner of the ship, almost like a large tap had been turned on. The water was cold on her fingers, and she drew her hand back quickly, walking towards the view of the turbulent sea.

Some of the waves were so big she felt the spray on her face or had to dodge back to keep her shins from getting wet - her trousers ended just above her knee. The sound they made surprised her, something as malleable as water making the crashes and booms seemed astonishing. _This is a dream._

There was a faint tugging from inside her, _the bond,_ and the sound of the waves suddenly seemed to be flat, as if she were hearing them from far away or as an echo, then the sound fell away completely and _he_ was there, Kylo Ren. _This is a dream._

Again she could see nothing but him, he was dressed as always in black from neck to toe, but without his mask and cape and with her mark upon his face, he seemed so much... _less_ . For some reason she couldn’t define, it lessened her hatred of him, which then made her hate him more, or maybe hate herself.

Yet she was afraid, she hadn’t expected this to happen again, she had tried to convince herself last time had been a waking dream, a nightmare. _This is a dream._

“Why is the force connecting us... you and I?” He asked her, voice quiet. _Why would she know that? He’d offered to train her, shouldn’t he know things like this?_ His voice pulled at something inside her and her anger rose to smother the feeling.

“Murderous snake!” She spat at him and felt a flicker of satisfaction as his slightly curious expression fell, his parted lips closing, jaw clenching. “You’re too late! You lost - I found Skywalker!”

His eyes dropped away from hers for a second before he looked back up and asked, “Did he tell you what happened?” He took a few steps towards her, “The night I destroyed his temple, did he tell you why?”

Rey glared at him, “I know everything I need to know about you.” _This is a dream..._

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

When Kylo felt Rey awaken he shut his eyes immediately and reached out to her, but though their connection seemed stronger, he couldn’t hear her or know if she heard him.

He growled and punched his fist into the dash as he opened his eyes. _Why couldn't they hear each other?_

“What the fuck was that for?” Finn said, right next to him.

He turned, belatedly remembering he wasn’t alone. He felt Ingalan’s hand squeeze his shoulder, both a warning and a comfort.

He took a calming breath, then another. “There was a fly.” He said as blandly as he could to Finn, who gave him a disbelieving look but mercifully dropped the subject.

 

They stopped on the outskirts of Ossus for fuel and to stretch their legs. It was late in the morning and they seemed to be making good time at least. As Kylo stood looking at some ruins in the distance a sudden pain lanced through him, he hissed and stumbled, _someone had hurt Rey._ It was gone as fast as it came, he tasted blood as he bit his lip in frustration; he could feel that she hadn’t been hurt badly, but this was the first real intentional injury he had felt from her and it cut him up inside. He clenched his fists as he tried to suppress his rage at the thought of someone putting hands on her, hurting her. The beast inside was barely contained, and had been since she’d been stolen from him, his sanity balanced on a knife edge; but he had to keep his head as level as he could, fury wouldn’t help him find her, it was not yet time to unleash the beast.

“Are you okay?” Ingalan asked him softly as he came to stand beside him.

Kylo shook his head slightly, replying in a strained but equally soft voice, “ _No_ . Someone just _hurt_ her. Not badly, but I hate knowing without knowing, if that makes sense?”

Ingalan nodded. “It does… We will find her, brother. And she is tough, she lasted all those years on her own, if anyone can survive this, she can.”

Poe was exhausted so Hux took over driving for a while. None of them were happy about it, but while they were on busy roads, in well policed areas, it wouldn’t be safe for any of the others to try driving.

Kylo, Poe and Finn got in the back of the van to sleep and Javiell and Ingalan joined Hux in the front, keeping a close eye on him.

Part of Kylo didn’t want to sleep, didn’t want to stop watching Hux, but he was weary and Saleucami was getting steadily nearer, and he didn’t know where to go from there other than south.

So he had to trust the Knights to watch Hux and he needed to sleep and try to connect with Rey again. She was awake but he could feel her getting drowsy, hopefully, if he had any luck left, they would be able to meet in that _in between_ place again…

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Even though it was not his Rey, he was sure that his Rey was inside, like he was with his doppelgänger. And, _oh,_ she was a sight for his sore eyes, even though she wasn’t his, he drank in the vision of her, and found his doppelgänger doing the same. _This is a dream._

Rey’s expression and voice were vitriolic as she spat “I know everything I need to know about you.”

“You do?” He said, but she didn’t answer him. “Oh you do,” He said softly, voice going slightly deeper as some dark emotion tried to claw its way up his throat and out, but he wouldn’t let it.

Her glare became more stubborn, her jaw set. “You have that look in your eyes from the forest…” He paused as he watched her face, cataloguing all the features, every expression, “When you called me a monster.” _This is a dream._

She replied straight away, with such depth of hatred, it made Kylo reel inside the other Kylo’s head. “You _are_ a monster.”

Kylo’s doppelgänger took another deliberate step towards her before replying, in a slightly unsteady, almost proud tone, “Yes I am.”

Something in her seemed shocked at his agreement, almost as if she hadn’t truly believed it, even though she herself had said it seconds before… she seemed… disappointed?

He had a few seconds to study her face, before the connection ended and he found himself alone again, back on the Supremacy. _This is a dream._

Strangely he felt drops of water hit his face, he wiped it with a gloved hand, looked at the drops, and clenched his fist around them. _He would find her, and Skywalker too…_

Kylo was once again sucked away from the lucid double dream and found himself returned to the endless night, and there was his Rey.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

_ <Kylo!> _ In the darkness, Kylo shone like a lonely sun and Rey darted towards him, desperate to drown herself in his presence.

_ <Rey!> _ He cried as he met her and again they seemed to blend perfectly together.

_ <Kylo, we must be quick, I don’t know how long I’ve been asleep and there are things you need to know.> _ She rushed on before he could answer, afraid they’d run out of time again, _ <We were going through Huloon about lunch time, we came via Sleheyron. I’m having trouble escaping because they put me in a fucking shock collar, which I haven’t been able to work out how to get off on my own yet, but I am working on it. The most important thing is that I know who these two guys are, and who they normally work for.> _

She paused for a moment, trying to order her thoughts, then carried on. _ <They are hitmen, dogs for hire, career criminals, I’ve heard of them, everyone in the south has, they mostly work for the Hutts, one of the most notorious crime families, they are gangsters, Kylo. They are more than dangerous, I don't know what the fuck they want with me, but... but, Kylo, please, please don’t follow me. I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you. I can work this out on my own.> _

Rey realised belatedly that it would have been easier not telling Kylo where she had been, if he didn’t know where she was, he couldn’t follow. _Blood and fucking ashes!_

She felt a surge of fear and anger crash into her like the waves she had watched in her double dream, it left her reeling. Kylo somehow managed to growl, even though he had no throat, no real voice here. It was a blood curdling sound.

**_< I. AM. COMING. FOR. YOU.>_ ** He snarled furiously, _ <Nothing you can do will stop me. I mean it Rey. _ **_Nothing._ ** _ > _ And he enveloped her, he was everywhere, all around her, she was overwhelmed by his presence. The shock of it made her gasp, sucking her back into her body, back in the van, where she sat up abruptly, coughing. _Fuck._

She took a sip of water and rubbed her eyes, that hadn’t gone so well. She really should have thought it through before she’d rushed into telling him all that. _Light! She was such an idiot._

She felt fury pulse through the bond, it seemed he too had woken up. _ <Kylo?> _She sent tentatively. Nothing. They still couldn't talk then, though considering his current mood that may not be such a bad thing.

She let out a frustrated sound and rubbed her face. She wasn’t sure how long she had slept but it felt like no time at all. She scooted over to her spy hole, it was late afternoon, so perhaps three hours? Maybe four?

Rey wanted to kick something, she wasn’t sure if this was Kylo’s anger or her own, or perhaps it was a blend of both. Either way, she was so over being trapped in the back of this fucking van, being manhandled by these, these, ...Rey let loose a furious growl; _she couldn’t even seem to come up with a suitable insult._

She punched the side of the van… _Oh shit._ That was stupid. The van started to slow down. _Fuck._

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo woke up snarling, the sound ripping from his throat, there was shouting around him but he wasn’t listening, the beast was almost free, and the worst thing was, he almost didn’t care if it got loose.

The van swerved to a stop, pulling up on the verge as angry motorists punching their horns at the sudden move. The door opened and Kylo launched himself out of the van, pulling away from the arms that were trying to contain him, he ran twenty feet into the trees.

He needed to punch something, rip into to something, but he couldn’t, he couldn’t risk injuring himself; he needed to be whole, in case a situation arose and he needed to fight.

_And she’d tried to stop him._ He let out a furious roar. Birds took flight from the surrounding trees.

“Kylo?” Ingalan said, voice hesitant, “You in there?”

_“Just.”_ Kylo grated, chest heaving as adrenaline rushed through him. It wasn’t just his, he could feel anger coming from Rey now too, or the bond was acting as a massive feedback loop.

“What happened?”

Kylo turned to see the Knights fanned out behind him, faces a mixture of concern and determined resolve. _Shit, who was watching Hux?_

The worry of that thought grounded him somewhat, he let out a long careful breath and walked towards them, then gasped as a spike of pain rippled through the bond. It was much worse than the one before. Strong arms supported him and he realised he’d almost fallen over.

He straightened, swallowed. “They hurt her again, worse this time.” His voice sounded raw, even to his ears.

“Is that why you lost it?” Zainmar asked and Kylo shook his head.

“No, no… I just spoke to her in a dream again. She tried to tell me not to come, it sent me off the deep end… But she knows who they are, and apparently they are very bad news and she said… they have her in a shock collar, does anyone know what that is?”

“I do.”

They all flinched. Hux moved out from behind a tree. _Oh, shitting hell._

Hux’s face was oddly blank as he walked cautiously towards them. “It’s a sort of torture device, mostly used on slaves in the south. It’s worn around the neck and emits electric shocks with variable voltage.” Kylo felt bile rise in his throat as Hux continued, “It shocks the wearer if they try to touch it, and they usually have a perimeter setting, as well as a remote control. They’re meant to be illegal.” He paused as he studied Kylo, then asked, “Did she give you any names?”

_How long had he been there? Had Hux heard everything then?_ He clenched his jaw, “No, no names of the two men, but she said they work for Hutts?”

Hux’s lips thinned. “That will be the Fett twins then,” He grimaced, “This is going to be much harder than even I anticipated. Did she have any idea what they want?”

Kylo shook his head. “How do you know all this?” Javiell asked Hux suspiciously.

Hux shrugged slightly, pale eyes cold, “Like I said, I have good connections... and I read the out of state news, most people have heard of the Hutts.”

Kylo looked at Hux and frowned, if he knew that this was going to be hard, _why was he here?_ He had felt Rey’s fear and urgency when she had told Kylo about these men, and if Hux knew them, he must know something of their reputation…

“Hux, really, why are you here?”

But Hux ignored the question, instead asking one of his own, “Did she say where they went after Saleucami? If we can work out which branch of the Hutt family the Fetts are working for, we may be able to take a short cut.”

Kylo frowned at Hux’s evasion but the possibility of getting to their destination quicker distracted him, “They went past Sleheyron and were most recently in Huloon.”

Hux frowned, “That isn’t far from Nal Hutta, we are fucked if she is taken there, but that seems unlikely…” He shook his head, “There is someone I can call who may be able to give me some information.” And with that, he turned and started walking back to the road.

The Knights all looked at each other. “Err, what just happened?” Zainmar asked.

Kylo shook his head, “I have no idea.” All his anger had drained away like it had never been there, he just felt tired and confused and worried.

“We should go back, it’s probably time to have something to eat.” Ingalan said and Kylo nodded and started walking.

“Do you think he heard everything?” Leonmar asked.

“If he did, he didn’t seemed surprised by it, which is weird.” Zainmar said.

Ingalan shook his head, “He can’t have heard about the dream surely? It would have sounded ridiculous, he wouldn’t have believed it.”

“You’d think that, but how does he think Kylo is getting his information?”

Kylo shook his head, “I have no idea. And that really worries me.”

Javiell grunted, “Me too.”

“Well, at least he is currently being really useful.” Zainmar said.

“As far as we know,” Javiell said darkly, “We need to find a way to check his information.”

When they reached the van they found Hux pacing up and down about ten feet away, talking on a mobile phone, while Poe and Finn watched him through narrowed eyes.

“Did anyone know he had a phone on him?” Leonmar asked. Everyone shook their heads.

“What happened?” Finn asked as he walked over to them and left Poe watching Hux.

“Bad dream and new information.” Kylo said shortly, grabbing a sandwich and tearing into it.

Finn raised his eyebrows in disbelief. Ingalan clapped him on the shoulder and drew him away, talking softly.

Kylo watched the road as he ate, somehow, he really, _really_ needed to keep the beast in its cage, this self-sabotage was not going to help him rescue Rey. He needed to remember that, because she was everything.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

They had shocked Rey before even opening the van door, then whichever Twin it was shocked her again for good measure.

Rey’s body jerked as pain sliced through her, making her eyes water. “Care to tell me what just happened?” The Twin asked.

Rey swallowed thickly before replying, she had bitten her tongue. “I think it was a bad dream, I must have flailed about, sorry.” The apology tasted bitter but it needed saying if she wanted to avoid having the cuffs back on her wrists.

The Twin studied her carefully for a moment before saying, “Next time you make a noise, you get three shocks. The time after that you get six, and so on. Do you understand?”

Rey nodded jerkily, as much as the collar allowed. “Yes.”

He stared for a few more seconds, nodded once, then slammed the door shut again. The van pulled away moments later.

Rey sighed and leant against the side of the van, sipping some water to wash away the taste of blood. She really, _really_ needed to come up with a way out of the collar, or she was going nowhere.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs in my head:
> 
> ~Madness By Ruelle,  
> ~Souvenirs by Furyon,  
> ~Believer by Myrath,  
> ~Watercolor by Pendulum  
> ~Fuel by Metallica  
> ~Hunger by Amaranthe
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	71. Endure And Survive  (Morietur Altera Die)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: God, this took me such a long time to write, I’ll be honest, I am massively struggling with this at the moment. I had hoped to be able to post one more before I leave, but I don’t think I will have time, many apologies! I’m hoping the holiday helps me get my head back on properly… So this is the last post for two weeks-ish. I'm gonna miss you guys ♥

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Everyone was quiet in the Falcon when they got back on the road. The information from Rey had sobered everyone up and had somehow made the situation more real, and infinitely more serious.

Hux now knew things he hadn’t before, yet Kylo wasn’t sure just _how much_ he knew and couldn't think of a way of asking without giving things away if Hux _didn’t know._ It was a fucking omnishambles.

Poe had gone back to sleep but Kylo and Finn hadn’t been able to. Kylo could feel the tension coming off Finn in waves, he could feel his worry, which seemed to increase Kylo’s.

As it drew close to evening, Finn eventually broke the silence. “We should change number plates. When it is fully dark and we can stop somewhere out of the way, we need to pike some number plates and change them with ours. It will make us harder to follow. We must have been found to be missing by now... Poe did tell Brobard and Jess to cover for us, but that could only last so long.”

Kylo rubbed his eyes irritably and he glared at Finn, “We told you not to tell anyone.”

Finn shrugged, “If we hadn’t, we would have been reported to be missing much sooner. We didn’t tell them where we planned to go, just that we were going to find Rey, and they needed to keep our absence, _and yours,_ under wraps for as long as they could.”

Hux shifted in the driver's seat, “I did the same. If I hadn’t, an alarm would have been raised before breakfast.”

“I guess it’s a moot point now anyway.” Kylo sighed, perhaps they were right and it would have helped, but Leia had said she would find him this morning, so he doubted it had worked out, and he doubted Chewie would have been able to keep Han from realising the Falcon was missing for long either.

“The number plate switch is a good idea though.” Javiell said.

Kylo nodded absently, “We’ve got Rey’s tool kit with us, there should be a screwdriver in there.”

 

They reached Saleucami at around 11pm and found an out of the way spot to _‘pike’_ number plates from another van.

Kylo kept the original plates, stowing them carefully in the back of the Falcon, Han would be mad enough over him borrowing the van and going away, if he lost the plates on top of everything else, Han would likely kill Kylo, if Leia didn’t beat him to it first. He tried not to think about what was happening back at school right now. The further they got away from Canto Bight, the better in many ways, as well as catching up with Rey.

Poe took over driving again, this late at night they could really push the limits and the Falcon seemed only too happy to oblige, every now and then Poe would chuckle quietly to himself, shaking his head slightly at the unexpected power of the modified van.

Despite knowing they were making extremely good time, Kylo couldn’t help the panic that fluttered at the edge of his mind constantly, as that invisible timer counted down the seconds in his head.

Hux’s contact had so far drawn a blank, but was apparently doing some ‘digging’ and would get back to them.

From Finn and Hux’s instruction, they all now had some idea of how the various weapons Hux had acquired worked, (apart from the A.S.W. apparently only Hux was allowed to use that, though Kylo had observed Javiell staring at it hungrily every now and then.)

Finn and Hux both seemed to know an alarming amount about guns, Kylo had never pegged Hux as that sort of boy and Finn had always seemed so… _soft._

Along with driving, Poe’s dad had given him an air rifle and taken him to his local gun club a few times and Kylo and the Knights had had a very accurate set of BB guns they used to use against each other (and other students) in the first few years of school, (before Mara found them and confiscated them) so that was a small help.

While they had nothing better to do, they familiarised themselves with the hand guns, going over how to load them, how to hold them, how to aim, and how to turn the safety off. (This was done without live rounds in). Everyone had a handgun and there were two spare ones. The grips on the compact guns were customisable and they were able to adapt them to their individual hand sizes.

The frag grenades were self explanatory, as were the heat sensitive binoculars, the ear comms were easy to figure out and no one needed help with the body armour.

The assault rifles were somewhat more complicated, Hux knew what he was doing, and in the end the other was assigned to Poe.

Kylo had taken Rey’s favourite knife for himself, and the Knights and Finn had shared out the rest between them. Hux had studied them carefully, lips slightly parted as he looked, then had touched them delicately as if they weren’t steel but spider silk... yet he hadn’t taken any for himself.

Javiell had got very excited when he found a pair of what he called karambits and Poe had looked faintly sick when he had found a skinning knife, obviously well used, until Finn pointed out Rey had probably used it on the rock rabbits she had hunted, not on people. Kylo thought there was a tinge of uncertainty in Finn’s face when he said that, but Kylo was fairly sure Rey had never skinned someone, at least not in real life.

Hux and the Knights in the back were all sleeping, Finn and Poe were quiet, occasionally talking in soft whispers that Kylo didn’t listen to.

The road they were travelling on wasn’t lit, the sound of the engine and the dark view outside eventually lulled him into sleep.

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_  


Rey lay on her back, the sound of the van’s engine and the beating of her heart all she could hear.

She had been even more angry after being shocked and to get away from it, she had descended into the cold place. The emptiness was a balm, a blessing and at this point, it didn’t matter she was there because she and Kylo couldn’t talk anyway.

But she missed the stars, the sky, _her freedom._ In Jakku she had more freedom than this, in Canto Bight too. This confined, sensory blinding, moving prison cell was becoming too much for her; she was trapped, good and proper.

Inside the cold void, her emotions were distant, she was apart from them, as free as she could be.

The next time the van stopped she wasn’t sure how long she had lain still. She sat up slowly, still impassive and remote as she regarded the Twin that opened the door.

Whichever one it was opened his mouth to speak, then cocked his head and studied her intently for a moment. She had no idea why, and she really didn’t care anymore.

“Do you need a rest break?” He asked, she nodded calmly. His mouth tightened and he stood aside so she could exit.

To her surprise, they were at a ‘fuel and food’ onestop, she stood, seemingly obedient, waiting for his instruction as she studied her surroundings quickly. They were in a built up area, blocks of flats and factories blocked out the sky and the air was thick and heavy, she could taste the pollutants in the back of her throat.

“You can use the restroom, you have three minutes. We are in the south now, no one will question the collar or try to help you if you ask it, so I would not advise doing so.”

Rey gave him another nod then walked swiftly towards the single restroom attached to the outside of the onestop.

Relieving herself in the wilderness had probably been cleaner but this gave her a brief chance to study the collar on her neck in the broken, dirty mirror, in the restroom, (if you could call it that.)

One look was enough; it was a Shackle 24601 and was known in Jakku as a ‘Lifer’, because you were never getting out of it.

She dispassionately splashed water on her face and hands, used her top to dry them, then walked swiftly back to the van and the waiting Twin after carefully noting the road sign across the street: ‘ _Tsyk Town Centre, Next Left’._

The Twin awaiting her handed her the usual sandwich and water bottle and she was about to climb back into the van when he grabbed her jaw in his hand and brought his face close to hers.

His breath was hot and smelled of coffee, his brown eyes searched hers for a moment, then she heard the familiar sound of a switchblade knife unlocking and he brought it up to her face, an inch away from her right eye.

Rey stayed in the void, this was either some sort of test, or he just felt like hurting her, but if she did anything he’d shock and/or cut her. Some storms could only be weathered.

His hard fingered grip was hot against her skin which had been cooled by the water moments before. After what seemed like a long time he drew the blade away.

“Impressive.” He said softly, and let go of her chin. He took her right arm and cut the sleeve off her t-shirt, then did the same with her left, he tossed the sleeves in the van, then took her left arm and sliced a line about three inches long across the back of her forearm, it wasn’t deep but it wasn’t a scratch either.

Rey drew a breath in but didn’t blink as he held her gaze, there was the barest hint of a smile on his face, “Plutt was not exaggerating, it seems.”

He gestured to the material of her severed sleeves, “You can use those to bind the wound, now get in.” Rey did.

She reached for a sleeve before he closed the door and it went dark, and bound the wound as best she could. _What had just happened?_ She fumbled in the dark for the sandwich and water bottle.

Settling herself against the side of the van and crossing her legs while she ripped into the sandwich, she sat and tried to evaluate what the purpose of the Twin’s actions were.

The removal of her long sleeves seemed almost a kind gesture - it was very hot after all. But the knife near her eye had been a test of some sort and the cut on her arm was either a test and/or pure sadism.

_Had she passed the test?_ _And would it be better if she had not?_ Unkar Plutt had liked causing pain, as had others from Jakku. There had been many different motivations, and sometimes they had been sexual.

She shifted uneasily, had she just shown the Twin she could take what he wanted to dish out? She still didn’t know her destination, but she found herself hoping that their orders were to deliver her whole and mostly unharmed.

With that in mind she decided to try and sleep, as they had stopped recently they shouldn’t have another for a while and she decided it would be best to be awake for any future stops. Though it was likely her body would wake her if the van stopped again, her survival instincts were reliable, at least.

Before she slipped into sleep, she rose up out of the cold void, relieved to find her irrational anger had dissipated; this situation was delicate and anger would not help her survive it. No, she was now sure the time for escape would be after she had been delivered, so patience and a cool head was what she needed now. She could endure this, her body would heal, her main aim for the rest of her time with the Twins, would be damage control.

_~ ~ ~ ~ ~_

It was night, the sky was dark grey with a full white moon hanging suspended between clouds. Rey was cold and she hunched her shoulders slightly as she walked back to the little stone hut she had been sleeping in whilst on the island. _This is a dream._

She felt tired, somewhat frustrated, rather emotional; so when the sound of the waves crashing against the cliffs far below her was sucked away, she didn’t turn to look at where Kylo Ren would undoubtedly be standing. _Would this just keep happening?_ A question for another time.

“I’d rather not do this now.” She said without turning around.

“Yeah, me too.” His voice was quiet, oddly casual sounding. _This is a dream._

Rey took a breath in then asked, “Why did you hate your father.” She turned to face him as she spoke, it seemed he had also had his back to her and was turning too. She was startled to see he was topless. The sight made her flustered, uncomfortable and she dropped her eyes away from the contrast of his black trousers and pale, chiseled chest and arms. “Do you have something - a cowl or something you can put on?” He remained silent, but she could feel his gaze on her, she dropped her eyes again, but the need for an answer to her first question pushed her to raise them again, a wealth of emotion behind her voice as she asked, “Why did you hate your father? Give me an honest answer.” He started to walk towards her, but she wouldn’t be diverted, hating that her voice broke and her eyes leaked but she couldn’t stop, “You had a father who loved you, he gave a damn about you!” _This is a dream._

“I didn't hate him” he told her quietly, he was very close to her now.

“Then why?” She cried, unable to understand, but needing to.

“Why what?” He asked, “Why what? Say it.” _Light,_ he was cruel. _This is a dream._

Rey’s tears flowed freely now and she choked on her first attempt at answering him before she could get it out, “Why did you… why did you kill him? I don’t understand.” Her heart hurt, clenching in her chest, making her breathing hitch as she fought sobs.

“No? Your parents threw you away like garbage.” His tone was soft, which made his words seem so much more callous. Why did a man like him get such wonderful parents? _This is a dream._ Anger rose up in her at his spite, “No they didn’t!” She said as she bared her teeth at him…

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

 

Kylo was reeling, he had… his doppelgänger had killed his father? _He had killed Han?_ And he was now heartlessly mocking Rey’s lack of parents. _This is a dream._

“They did, but you can’t stop needing them.” His doppelgänger’s mind was so certain, suffused with an arrogant surety. “It’s your greatest weakness, looking for them everywhere, in Han Solo... now in Skywalker.” As Kylo felt his thoughts turn to Skywalker, _Luke?!_ He could feel a ripple of intensity flood through his mind, “Did he tell you what happened that night?” He asked feeling triumphal at exposing Luke as a liar. _This is a dream._ The tears flowing unheeded from Rey’s eyes glittered in the moonlight as she defensively spat, “Yes!”

“No,” And the doppelgänger allowed himself a small smile, even as the memories of that night washed over him, how afraid he had been, how wounded, how lost, as he had awoken to the green glow of Luke’s bared lightsabre and the murderous intent in his eyes. “He had sensed my powers, as he senses yours, and _he feared it.”_ It had turned out for the best, without Luke rejecting him, trying to kill him, he would never have become what he was now, he was powerful, and power was everything. _This is a dream._

Rey let out a shocked breath, almost a gasp and dipped her eyes to the ground before looking back up at him, “Liar.” But he could see the seeds of doubt his words had sown, and he pushed the advantage.

He took another step nearer her, keeping his tone soft still, his eyes watched her face as he told her, “Let the past die, kill it if you have to, it’s the only way to become what you were meant to be.” _This is a dream._

And then she was gone and he was alone in his room on the Supremacy once more, yet her presence lingered, he could almost feel the weight of her gaze, heavy on his skin… The feelings the Scavenger stoked in him were unwelcome, and thinking about Han had upset his fragile equilibrium. He decided he needed a shower.

_~ ~ ~ ~ ~_

When Kylo was sucked away into the dream-void, he almost didn’t register the light of Rey’s presence. He was still shocked, horrified that his doppelgänger had killed his own father. Even though it was a dream, it felt so real and he found it impossible not to fear that Han, _his_ father, was also somehow dead, after all, his face matched his doppelgänger’s…

_ <Kylo?> _ Her mind was quiet, soft on the surface, but he could feel the emotions roiling beneath. _ <Are you okay? You’re not him, Kylo, and he is _ **_not_ ** _you. > _

Kylo would have nodded if he’d had a head in that place, but he didn’t. _ <I know that.> _ He told her sadly, then mentally shook himself and changed the subject, _ <Are you okay? You went all cold for a while… I was worried.> _

He felt her pulse, her warmth radiated to him as she seeped into his essence, _ <I’m fine. I just needed… I needed some help calming down… We were is Tsyk not long ago, perhaps two hours ago, it was dark.> _

He revelled in the closeness, the fluttering fear he’d been feeling, paused, even if it were only for a moment. _ <We passed through Saleucami at 11pm Sunday night.> _ He told her in an attempt to give her hope.

They existed for a time, just together, in the darkness between dreams and waking, in the place where she would always be his and his alone.

_ <I must go,> _ He could feel her reluctance, _ <It’s not safe to sleep for too long. Please, Kylo, be careful, I love you.> _

_Not safe?_ He wanted her to explain that, but Rey winked out of existence and Kylo was alone. Just like his doppelgänger…

The fluttering was back, the fear and worry making him itch and the darkness suddenly seemed crushing, unfriendly... He found if he exerted himself, he could just push himself forwards, into the waking world.

_~ ~ ~ ~ ~_

Kylo awoke to find his face wet and he surrepticiously dried it on his sleeves, before looking around.

There was the barest hint of dawn in the sky, the others in the back were still sleeping. He nodded gratefully as Finn handed him some water.

“Rough dream?” Finn asked, and Kylo grimaced. “Is Rey okay?” Finn’s voice climbed higher and Kylo frowned at him.

“She’s coping. She said they most recently went through Tsyk.” He whispered back.

Finn’s expression relaxed slightly as he nodded, “We’ve just been through Nimia, we’re doing well.”

Kylo nodded mutely and turned to stare out of the passenger window, watching the sky gradually lighten as the shroud of night slowly lifted, ushering in a new day, another day without Rey.

 

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

 

_These are the darkest clouds,_  
_That have surrounded me,_ _  
_ Now I find myself alone,

_caught in a cage._

 

_~ Caged by Within Temptation_

  
_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are interested, the weapons used by Team Peanut are based on:  
> Handguns: Glock 17 Gen 4  
> Assault rifle: SA80  
> A.S.W: L2A1 ASM (MATADOR)  
> Frag grenades: HG 85  
> Songs:  
> ~God Help Me by Emilie Autumn  
> ~Die Another Day by Madonna  
> ~Cruelty by The Crüxshadows  
> ~I Am A Stone by Demon Hunter
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	72. Dream Of Mirrors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, thanks to [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) being an amazing Beta and thanks to my brain not letting me sleep before I fly, here is another chapter. ♥

******~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 ****  
_This distance_  
_This disillusion_  
_I cling to memories_  
_While falling_  
_Sleep brings release_  
_And the hope of a new day_  
_Waking the misery_  
_Of being without you_  
_  
_ ~The End of Heartache by Killswitch Engage

  **~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~** ****

Rey awoke covered in sweat and tears. That dream had been intense, heartbreaking. She had wanted to stay with Kylo, entwined in each other in that endless night they had found, but her body had called her and she had had to obey.

She pulled her top up to wipe her face, the van had slowed right down and as she took a swig from her water she felt it stop.

It couldn’t have been long since the last break, not more than three hours, though without looking through her spyhole she couldn't be sure. But if she looked and they opened the door at the wrong time, they may block the hole up and it was useful.

So she sat and waited, sinking into a cool, blank state of nothing, trying to ignore the heavy weight of her jeans and how hot they made her.

The van started up again perhaps half an hour later, without the door opening and she breathed a small sigh out before scooting over to peer through her spyhole.

It was dawn, the sky was pink and limpid; it was going to be very hot today. _Shit._ If they didn’t give her more water she may pass out or worse. She pulled off her boots and socks and pulled her top up to bare her back and stomach then lay down flat against the metal of the floor, concentrating on measuring her breathing and thinking about cold things.

From the weight of her water bottle she had roughly half left, if the day went as the previous ones did, that would have to last her till late this evening.

Rey found slight comfort in knowing the Twins were desert born, hopefully they’d realise she’d need more water, _hopefully_ . But she could not assume, _assumption led to death._

She turned her thoughts to the dreams she and Kylo were sharing, _what did they mean? Was there a purpose to them, or was it just coincidence? Just a side effect of their bond?_

Their dream-selves were not themselves, they were _others_ , seemingly different people in the same skins, existing in a bizarre world, or worlds.

Rey wondered if the Han in that place was the same as the one in this one, what had driven the other Kylo to kill his father? Perhaps like the other Kylo, the other Han had been cruel, but Rey did not think so…

A sudden thought occurred to her and she smiled slowly, that first dream of theirs, the first one they had shared, she had influenced that guard to do what she wanted, she had entered Kylo’s mind; _could she do it again?_

Admittedly she and Kylo’s abilities seemed to be on the fritz, and seemed to mainly work when they were together and touching, but… it had not been the case in their dreams.

And as he got closer, she could feel their connection strengthen, _ <Kylo...?> _ no, not quite there it seemed, but almost.

Well, she could still try on her own. It was dark inside the van but she closed her eyes anyway as she centred herself, breathing out deeply three times as she sunk further into the blissfully cold nothingness.

She let it spread throughout her body, let it fully envelop her mind, let the chill enter her soul… and there- _there_ was the tickling sensation of other minds, other lives, and she could feel something connecting everything…

There was a snapping sensation and the thread of her connection to everything was gone, though she could still feel Kylo.

So, there had been _something_ there, she had _felt_ it… all she had to do was practice. And it wasn’t like she had anything better to do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Operation Peanut team, (as Finn still called them despite repeated glares and thinly veiled threats from Hux) reached Sleheyron shortly after 10am, rather than going via Huloon as Rey had done, they took the shorter route straight to Tsyk, though they skirted around Nal Hutta as it was becoming obvious they did not fit in in this region.

Finn disappeared for thirty minutes while they were getting fuel in Khalterr, Poe and Hux were arguing about whether they should leave Finn and go on without him, when he jogged back to the onestop, looking pleased with himself and carrying a fabric bag.

“Where have you been?” Kylo hissed at him, echoed by Hux. Poe took Finn’s hand and squeezed, not gently.

Finn winced at the pressure on his hand then casually looked behind himself, “I’m fairly sure I was followed, get in the van before they see who I leave with, I’ll explain when we’re on the road.”

Finn, Kylo and Poe got in the back as it was Hux’s turn to drive and they drove quickly but quietly off.

After five minutes of silence, Kylo elbowed Finn in the ribs and asked, “Well?”

Finn rolled his eyes, “Right. Well we needed better disguises, but it took longer than I had anticipated- it’s been a while since I haggled… Anyway, I’ve got us cowls with veils. The Jawas in the south wear them, we all seem to be dressed in black so that seemed to fit nicely and gives us an excuse to hide our faces. They are sometimes worn around here too because of the smog… It may also be a good idea to swap number plates again, just in case.” He rummaged in the fabric bag and handed everyone a cowl with attached veil and showed them how to put it on.

For a moment Kylo balked at the idea, it was too close to the way his doppelgänger hid _his_ face… But when he saw the others try them on he had to admit it made them anonymous, and that could only be a good thing. He sighed in resignation as he followed suit, at least it would give them protection from the sun.

 

The bond seemed to get colder and colder, and by lunchtime Kylo almost felt his teeth chattering in reaction. _ <Rey?> _ There was a slightly rippling echo, but nothing else. If she was in this deep, had something bad happened? _Was she hurt? Light… Was she dying?_ He clenched his fists at his sides, tried to breathe. He could do _nothing_ , this distance was killing him… If Rey died… He would… No, he mustn’t think like that, he would go mad. He fished in Leonmar’s bag and found a bottle of Firewhiskey.

“Kylo?” He looked up to see everyone but Hux looking at him, concern and fear etched on their faces. Ingalan’s eyes darted to Hux and then away again, “Everything okay?” He asked carefully.

Kylo shut his eyes and took a pull from the bottle, “No. That is, _I don’t know_ . Something’s _wrong_ but I don’t know what… I need help,” He lifted the bottle, “I need to _sleep_.” From their expressions they got his meaning.

“I’ve got some antihistamines.” Hux said blandly. “They’re in the front pocket of my backpack. Knock yourself out.”

Zainmar guffawed at the pun then looked embarrassed to have laughed at a joke made by Hux.

Kylo found the tablets easily and swallowed one with a mouthful of Firewhiskey. He rested his head back and closed his eyes, _willing_ himself to sleep, it came slowly, reluctantly, as if it didn’t want to grant him access to Rey, as if the very universe wished to deny him what was his. Kylo’s last coherent thought before he claimed sleep was _‘mine’._

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey found herself back on the island. And in the darkness, in the crash of the waves and the sound of the wind, _something_ was calling to her. Something that had been calling her for a long time, and tonight, she would finally answer it.

She made her way back down the steep cliff, over the black jagged teeth of the rocks, her feet steady beneath her.

And there it was, the hole, the way beneath the island, the place Luke seemed to fear so much… But weren’t Jedi meant to be above fear? Fear was an emotion after all.

Rey had come to the island for Luke and for answers, it was becoming clear that Luke would not help the Resistance, but perhaps this journey would not be a waste of time, if Rey could find some answers.

The hole had dark green seaweed radiating out of the mouth, as if it were trying to escape something, or trying to infect something. In the light of the moon it looked black.

She knelt down, the weed wet and squishy beneath her knees as she peered into the hole. Something seemed to whisper, the call, the tug on her mind grew sharper and then she was physically tugged down the hole, she yelled as she fell but managed to close her mouth as she plunged into the freezing water below.

For a second she panicked, then she remembered Kylo, _her Kylo,_ the real one, and the time he had taught her to hold her breath and to kick to the surface. So that’s what she did, and somehow, she made it. When her head broke the surface she gasped with relief, a small surge of pride giving her the strength she needed to reach the rocks at the edge of the grotto and pull herself out.

Rey wasn’t sure what she had been expecting, but what met her was what seemed like a huge, cracked mirror where stone should be.

As she moved hesitantly nearer, she was confused to see a line of her reflections reaching back, seemingly forever, _what did it mean?_ She tentatively reached out her hand and touched the surface.

Suddenly she was _inside_ the mirror, she was now part of the long line of reflections of herself, she slowly moved her arm back down and watched as her copies did the same, but their actions were seconds behind hers, the further from her they were, the slower they moved, it was deeply unsettling.

She turned slowly to look behind her and found more of her copies behind her… _Was she just a copy herself?_ She felt real, but then, she was here, yet she was also somewhere else…

Rey frowned and faced the other way, then lifted her right arm and turned her wrist, watching as the same action was repeated with that slight delay again. This was beyond bewildering. They could not be mere reflections, if they were they would all move at the same time, _unless time moved differently here?_

She snapped her thumb and finger together, the sharp click became its own echo as her copies repeated it down the line, in front and behind her. The next time she did it, it had the same result.

She should have felt trapped or panicked, but she didn’t, this couldn’t go on forever, she felt that it must lead somewhere, and that at the end, it would show her what she wanted to see, give her the answer that she had been seeking for years.

And then somehow, she was at the end, or the beginning, of the line facing the opaque mirror wall again, this time with an army of her copies at her back, as if they were urging her on.

She reached out again, placing her middle finger against the surface of the mirror, from behind her came the whispers of her others, they knew what she would say before she did, a reverse echo, as she whispered, “Let me see them... my parents.... _Please_ …”  

All her fingertips were pressed against the mirror now and her stomach tightened as two shapes began to take shape behind it, her breathing sounded loud as it reverberated around her.

She watched as what had seemed to be two figures joined to become one, then the shadow raised a hand and placed it against her own, with just the mirror between them. This felt momentous, a culmination of years of hoping, of waiting, of being faithful to a vague memory.

Her heart was jumping in her throat as she watched the opaqueness dissolve like steam on glass, disappearing… yet all it revealed was her own reflection, staring back at her.  

Rey’s heart plummeted, it felt like it had left her body, like it was gone for good. She fell to her knees, the emptiness inside, a deep, yawning abyss, solely made for her alone. All the certainty, all the resolve left her.

She spaced out, lost herself in her thoughts and when she came back to herself she found she had somehow made it back, out of the hole, up the cliff and into her little hut.

She mechanically lit a fire, wrapped a blanket around her freezing body and sat gazing into the flames… The sounds of the fire crackling in the stone pit were sucked away, and even though it was Kylo Ren sitting opposite her, the company was a relief.

And he actually listened to her, didn’t comment as the tears trickled unheeded down her cheeks, he didn’t smirk at her distress or goad her into an argument. He just listened.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kylo studied Rey carefully over the flames, her soaking clothing was steaming as it dried, half her hair was loose, curling slightly on her shoulders as it dried and for the first time his doppelgänger saw her defeated, all her determination had left her. It should have made his doppelgänger smile, it should have made his dark heart sing at the sight of his enemy laid low. Yet it didn’t, he felt his mask slip, felt him lose the fight against empathy, felt a hungry sort of pity seed itself as she spoke.

“I thought I’d find answers here... _I was wrong.”_ There was an ache inside him at the defeatist tone of her voice and the resigned hollowness as she finished, “I’d never felt so alone.”

“You’re not alone,” Kylo said, and he wasn’t certain if he had said it, his doppelgänger had, or if they both had. His tone was rough, low, it carried a wealth of his own pain in it, and true sincerity.

He swallowed as she finally looked up from the flames, the firelight flickered across her skin as she answered quietly, “Neither are you.” A warmth spread through him, _through them_. It had been a long time since someone offered his doppelgänger comfort, a longer time still since he had offered it in return.

“It isn’t too late,” She said, still softly as she looked at him, he swallowed, the lack of anger on her face was such a novelty, his doppelgänger found he liked it, this feeling he got when looking at her. The darkness in him shifted, wary and warning, he ignored it.

Rey slowly brought her right hand up, her other hand holding the blanket to her as she reached out her fingers towards him.

His doppelgänger swallowed and looked down, conflicted, but he couldn’t stop himself raising his eyes to hers again, and the vulnerability he saw there made him unable to resist her. He knew that look, that desperation, he saw it everyday in the mirror.

He pulled his right glove off, and slowly extended his hand towards hers, his pulse jumped in his throat, he could feel the force swell, almost as if it were urging them on. He didn’t even know if this were possible, but whatever their connection was, whatever bound them together, it wanted this, so it found a way.

She gasped as their fingers finally, barely touched, her lips parted as she breathed, eyes wide, tears still making tracks down her cheeks. Out of force of habit, he kept his emotions off his face, or at least, he almost did. He couldn’t help the tiny curve to his lips, or how his eyes drank her in. Then there were images, flickering behind his eyes, visions of the future, visions of her, _beside_ him, _with_ him.

Then something happened, he heard an angry shout and turned towards the door as the roof of the hut was ripped outwards. To his anger, their connection was severed and she was gone.

It was Luke, it had to be Luke. He shot up out of his chair and laid waste to his room, the crackling of his lightsabre music to his ears and he exorcised his fury, once again, Skywalker had interfered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

This time, when they met in the _inbetween_ , they crashed together, something in them had shifted, with their doppelgänger’s touch, something had bloomed, their connection felt solid, they forgot their confusion over what the dream had meant as their essences formed a maelstrom, sparks flying out as their lights consumed them, chasing away the darkness, bathing them in perpetual light.

 _ <Did you feel it too?> _ Kylo asked finally, as their combined light glowed around them. He could feel Rey smile as she replied.

 _ <Yes… and _ **_they_ ** _felt it, too. > _ She was warm now, her end of the bond pulsing with it,

which reminded him why he had fallen asleep in the first place, clearly she was okay but he asked anyway to be sure, _ <Are you okay? You went so cold, I was afraid something had happened.> _

A wave of her guilt hit him, _ <I’m sorry; I’m okay, I was just meditating, trying to manipulate the bond. I hadn’t realised I’d fallen asleep til I found myself on the island again…> _

_ <It’s okay, so long as you aren’t hurt.> _ He felt himself fading, _damn,_ those antihistamines weren’t all they were cracked up to be. _ <I’m waking up, but I am coming, and I will find you. Don’t forget that, you aren’t alone, my little Scavenger.> _

He was there long enough to hear Rey make an indignant noise, and then he was opening his eyes, a small smile on his face as he did so.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs:  
> Dream Of Mirrors by Iron Maiden  
> Colder by Charon  
> Perpetual by VNV Nation


	73. The Cavalry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hieeee! I had an awesome holiday but I missed you guys! ♥ Getting back into writing this had some problems and writing this chapter was like drawing teeth and then I realised I cocked up the timings/distances in the last chapter so I had to edit it, the place Finn gets the Jawa veils is now Khalterr and they get to Affavan in this chapter, not the previous one. (My bad, I suck at maths.) But, starting next one now! Hopefully it will get a bit easier now I remember where everyone is, (I get confused really easily.)

 

 

Kylo had not been gone long when Rey was pulled out of the _Inbetween_ herself. The van had already slowed to a crawl and she hurriedly sat up, wiped the tears from her cheeks, pulled her top down and stuffed her feet into her socks and boots.

_ <Rey?> _

_ <Kylo! Oh stars! I can hear you again!> _ Rey felt her eyes prickling with tears once more, a lump swelling in her throat. For someone who valued privacy, she really shouldn’t like having someone else in her head, but she did, and having Kylo back in direct contact was almost overwhelming.

_ <Rey! Oh light, you have no idea how good it is to hear you!> _

_ <Actually, I really do, but I’m sorry, I’m going to have to mute our connection for a bit, the van is stopping and it is better if nothing distracts me. I love you. I’ll reopen it soon, I promise.> _

She didn’t wait for his answer, she didn’t want to explain why she needed her head clear, it may make Kylo afraid or angry and that would help neither of them. So she dropped into the icy void as quickly as she could, and it wasn’t a moment too soon.

The van door opened and she looked cooly back at whichever Twin it was; she really wished they didn’t wear the same nondescript clothes, it would make her happier if she could tell them apart.

The Twin just threw a bottle of water at her and shut the door again. Rey caught it just before she was enveloped in the stuffy darkness again, it had been daylight outside and her eyes blurred from going from dark to light to dark again so quickly.

She downed the water remaining in her old bottle, then put her eye to the spyhole once the van started off again.

It looked to be mid afternoon, the landscape outside was barren, almost desert and the road they were on was quiet. She let out a sigh then slithered away from the spyhole and removed her boots and socks and pulled up her top as she had before.

Then she allowed herself to rise out of the cold place, _ <Kylo?> _

_ <Rey! Are you okay? Did something happen?> _

_ <I’m okay, well, okay considering. They just stopped to give me some water is all. We are going through desert terrain, but I don’t know where.> _

_ <We’re catching up Rey, I promise. We will get you back.> _

_ <Who is with you? How did you get away from school? Tell me everything, I am so fucking bored. I’ve been shut in this sodding van for days.> _

There were some slight hesitations and little evasions as Kylo told his story, he was leaving something out, but Rey found she didn’t particularly care, whatever it was it couldn’t be important. Just listening to his voice relaxed her, eased some of the tension that had taken over her mind and body in the last few days.

When he told her about the Jawa disguise she laughed, then slapped her hand over her mouth, afraid the Twins would hear and investigate.

_ <Rey? Are you okay?> _

Kylo must have felt her spike of anxiety. _ <I’m fine. But I laughed out loud and was worried they’d stop to find out why… The van isn’t slowing though, so they can’t have heard or just didn’t care… what made me laugh was that the Jawas are scavengers.> _

She felt Kylo echo her amusement as she went on, _ <Also, if you are going to pretend to be Jawas, you will need to line your eyes with kohl, it will look suspicious if you don’t. Their eyes are generally the only thing they show, do you have gloves?> _

_ <We do, I’ll see if I can find some… Kohl, if you are certain?> _

Rey held her laughter inside, _ <I am...> _ But her levity faded, _ <Kylo… The collar I am in is called a Shackle 24601, and they are almost impossible to get out of without the control. I’m going to try using those tricks from our dreams to get out of it, but if I don’t… if we don’t figure out a way to get it off, I won’t be able to go anywhere, even if you come and break me out.> _

She could feel his fury and fear, it hit her like a wave and she gasped, _ <Kylo, calm down! Breathe. We will work it out, I’m going to practice to see if I can influence one of the Twins minds or get inside it to learn why I was taken… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have told you.> _ A wave of guilt rushed through her, she really needed to think before she… well think before she _thought,_ at Kylo.

_ <You have nothing to be sorry for,> _ Kylo sent, even in her mind his voice was more a growl, _ <You’re right, we will figure it out somehow… I think I’ll work on trying the mind tricks too, we need any advantage we can get… Why do you think we can talk now? Was it our doppelgänger’s touching? I don’t remember them having skin to skin contact before.> _

Rey lay down on her back and rested her head on her rolled up hoodie as she thought, _ <I think it must be the skin to skin, and no, I don’t think they’d had it before… But… I mean, these dreams seem too real, sometimes they predict things, I can’t help but feel that they aren’t just dreams, but I don’t know what else they are… Did Luke and Leia mention anything about your grandfather having dreams too?> _ She would have to get Kylo to tell her again about his grandfather, she needed to properly process the information somewhere calm. At least they now knew that they weren’t both going mad and theirs was not an isolated situation.

_ <They didn’t and I don’t think I mentioned ours. We can ask them when we get home.> _

_Home._ Rey had a home to go to, with people she loved and friends and even her own room. Her eyes swam with tears suddenly at the thought, _bloody ashes,_ but she was turning into such a, such a… _a girl._ And this was not the time to be doing that, what she needed was strength, a quick mind and a cool head.

The relief of Kylo’s presence again seemed to drain away her energy suddenly, _ <Kylo? I think I’m going to sleep for a bit, is that okay?> _

There was a slight tinge of disappointment but he sent, _ <Of course. Sleep. I love you, little Scavenger.> _

Rey snorted softly, _ <I love you too, you massive land based tool. Talk to you later.> _

She fell asleep with the echo of his amusement in her mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey had awoken shortly after him, and to Kylo’s joy, their bond was back to full strength and the return of her presence, of her voice in his head, left him feeling a little dazed.

He should probably have tried to go back to sleep when she did, but he was too wired, too excited to settle.

He couldn’t communicate to the others about the re-established connection without Hux hearing… and that made him wonder again just how much Hux comprehended of their situation. Despite Hux’s usefulness and his sudden seemingly indifference to details, like how Kylo knew where Rey had just been, Kylo couldn’t help but be suspicious. In fact, Hux’s lack of curiosity made him even more suspicious.

Perhaps now would be a good time to try the abilities his doppelgänger possessed, if he could slip into Hux’s mind, then he may be able to answer some questions… Though on second thoughts, it may be best to try that while Hux was _not_ driving, just in case something went wrong.

The idea of doing it to Poe and Finn somewhat disgusted him, but he was fairly certain his brother’s wouldn’t mind too much, so he closed his eyes and relaxed, breathing deeply as he tried pushing his senses out.

There were some flickers, some vibrations and his bond to Rey expanded a little- he felt her shift in her sleep, but other than that, his efforts produced no results.

Kylo gave up a few hours later, the sun was sinking into the west and the sky had turned to red and purple fire.

As they continued on a harsh wind started blowing in from the east, carrying sand and dust with it and combined with the smog of the built up area they were in, it made visibility poor.

They postponed stopping till they entered Affavan around 8pm, by then they all needed to use a restroom urgently- no one had felt like braving the weather to pee at the side of the road.

They stopped at a retail park on the outskirts of Affavan, and after using the facilities they split up. Javiell and Ingalan stayed with Hux who was taking a phone call from his mysterious ‘contact’, and everyone else went to buy supplies as they were almost out of food and water.

As soon as Kylo felt they were out of earshot of Hux he said quietly, “Rey and I are back in contact.”

“Holy shit, that’s awesome! Is she okay? Can you hear her now?” Finn was positively bouncing as he trotted up next to Kylo.

Kylo rolled his eyes slightly, “She is back asleep now but she said she is okay; but the shock collar she’s in is impossible to get out of without the remote control, so if anyone can think of a way around that, that would be helpful. Also, she said if we are going to wear the hoods and veils, we need to get some _kohl?_ And put it on our eyes. Apparently if we don’t it will look suspicious.”

Poe chuckled, “Okay, to the makeup aisle we go then.”

Kylo blinked and met Zainmar and Leonmar’s wide eyes over Poe and Finn’s heads, “Make up?”

Poe looked at his face and chuckled again, “Yeah, makeup, kohl is basically eyeliner, I don’t know what the Jawas use or where they get it, but eyeliner will have to do. I’m sure your rampant masculinity will be able to take the hit, no problem.”

Finn laughed out loud at that, making several other shoppers look at them askance, and they were already garnering enough stares as it was. “Fine. But keep it down, low profile remember? You and Finn get the, get the makeup and we will get the food and stuff, meet you back at the van, asap.”

They may have to wear makeup, but there was no way Kylo would be seen dead looking at it in a shop, no matter where they were.

“Any idea why you and Rey can talk again?” Leonmar asked as they started filling a trolley with food.

Kylo shrugged, “We aren’t entirely sure but we did have another shared dream and this time we touched skin for the first time since they started.”

“Doesn’t kissing her in the first one count?” Zainmar said frowning.

Kylo shrugged again, “It was just her in that one, with my doppelgänger, I wasn’t there.”

“This is so weird.” Leonmar said and Kylo nodded.

He sighed as he scrubbed his hands threw his hair then threw protein flapjack into the trolley, “I know. Whatever happened, I’m just glad we can hear each other again, and we are gaining on them, I can _feel_ it.”

“Should we ask Hux if he can find any info on this slave collar they have her in?”

Kylo shuddered slightly, “Shock collar, Zain, not slave collar… and I don’t know, how do we explain it to him if he asks how we know?”

Leonmar waved his hands, “I think that is the least of our worries right now, Kylo. And he has been cagey about some things, if he asks we can just ignore the question. He does it all the time.”

“I suppose that’s true.” Kylo agreed unhappily.

“Do we have any plans for when we actually catch up to them?” Zainmar asked as he put two bags of apples in the trolley.

Kylo grimaced, “Not yet. It will be hard to make any plan before we know what we are dealing with, if we come on them alone on a backcountry road, it will be a lot easier than say, catching up to them in the centre of a town. We may have to just tail them till we get to a suitable location. Rey will be able to keep us updated to some extent, but her only view is through a hole in the back of the van, so it isn’t great.”

They were silent for a moment as they continued loading the trolley, then Leonmar said slowly, “What if we, bought, or stole, another vehicle? Then we could T-bone them, grab Rey and get away in the Falcon?”

Kylo stared at him incredulously, “You want to T-bone the van my _girlfriend_ is in the back of? Are you fucking mad?”

“Shit, Kylo, lower your voice. I’m not saying we do it hard, and if she has warning she can brace for it. Plus, we T-bone the cab, not the back, they get the brunt of it. I know it isn’t ideal, but it’s an idea at least, plus, don’t forget you guys can heal and stuff.”

To Kylo’s amazement, Zainmar nodded, “It isn’t perfect, but none of this is. We may not even end up having to use the guns that way… and it is more than likely one or more of us is going to get injured during the rescue, however we do it.”

Kylo opened his mouth on an angry retort, then shut it again with a click. Zainmar was right. They had bloody guns and grenades for fuck’s sake. He sighed as he considered the idea, it did have its merits.

“I see your point.” He said grudgingly, “We’ll discuss it with the others when we get back on the road, see what Jav and Ingalan can come up with too.”

Kylo felt Rey wake up as they left the shop and started for the Falcon, _ <Rey?> _

_ <Kylo> _ she sounded sleepy still.

_ <You sleep okay?> _

_ <Yeah, I wouldn’t have woken up, but the van is slowing down again. I need to focus, sorry. Talk to you later.> _And their connection started to get cold.

The implication of her always having to be in the state she used when she fought made him worry even more about her. What did he miss every time she did that?

They loaded the van and Poe took the driver’s seat, as they negotiated the car park, Kylo turned from the front so he could look at Hux, “Any news?” He asked the red head stiffly.

Hux gave him a smug smile, “Yes. We are heading for Tattooine. Unless we catch up with the Fetts before that. It is apparently Jabba Desilijic Tiure Hutt that Rey is being taken to. My contact doesn’t as yet, know precisely why, but Unkar Plutt has apparently been bemoaning the loss of his best scavenger to anyone who will listen in Jakku and word spread… It seems Rey has more form than even you knew Kylo… But that can’t be what interested Jabba, he is surrounded by criminals.”

Kylo’s fists itched, and he clenched them in his lap, his tolerance of Hux was wearing very thin indeed, and it was nearing the point where Hux’s usefulness would come to an end. And if he was going to lose Hux soon, he needed to squeeze all the information out of the weasel he could, before it was left behind.

“What can you find out about a…” He thought back to what Rey had said, “about how to get out of a Shackle 24601 shock collar?”

Hux’s eyes glittered, “I take it you mean without the control?” Kylo nodded, “I’ve heard of that one, and I don’t think it will be easy, but I will try and find out.” Kylo offered him another stiff nod as Hux took out his phone, then turned back around.

“You two found the kohl okay?” He muttered to Finn who was between he and Poe again.

Finn grinned, “Yeah. We got some _eyeliner,_ no problem.”

Kylo rolled his eyes at him in reply.

They headed back out of Affavan after making a brief stop to change the plates on the Falcon one more.

After half an hour of being back on the road, Kylo felt Rey ascend from the icy depths back into his head.

_ <Kylo?> _

_ <Hey, everything okay?> _

_ <Fine, just a rest break. We are travelling again.> _

She sounded tired, the stress of this must be so draining for her, it exhausted him and he hadn’t been kidnapped and stuck in the back of a van for several days.

_ <We found out where you are headed. The Fett’s are taking you to Tatooine and Jabba… something or other, I can’t remember his last names.> _

He felt her shock and confusion, _ <What the hell does Jabba the Hutt want with me? This makes no bloody sense! ...Shit, we stopped at Molavar, that isn’t far from Tatooine, we’ll probably get there sometime tomorrow morning… Wait, hang on, how the hell did you find this out?> _

Kylo shifted uncomfortably in his seat, _ <You wouldn’t like the answer to that and it doesn’t matter now anyway. This doesn’t really change things, we just know the destination, if we can’t catch up to you before then, we’ll still get you out. I promise, Rey.> _

_ <Saying I wouldn't like the answer just makes me what to know it more!> _Her exasperated tone was clear.

Kylo shrugged, then remembered Hux was in the van with them and he turned it into a sort of yawning action.

_ <Why did you just think of Hux?> Rey sent suspiciously. _

Oh. Brilliant. Well done Kylo. _ <No idea,> _ he sent, trying to sound as unruffled as he could, _ <maybe because Hux sounds like Hutt?> _actually it really did, he coughed to cover a small chuckle.

Rey must have felt his wave of childish amusement, as she seemed to relax, _ <I guess it does. Maybe when we get home we should start calling him Hutt instead. I can’t imagine he’d like that.> _

_ <No. I don’t think he would.> _ He agreed. _ <Oh, we got some kohl by the way, but you have to promise not to laugh at me when you see me.> _

_ <I imagine I will be too distracted with trying to get away, to laugh at you. I can’t promise not to once we get clear, though.> _

Kylo smiled out the passenger window, _ <I was thinking… maybe on the way home, once we are far away, we could stop somewhere for the night… maybe get a separate room together? We all definitely need showers, and sleeping in a real bed would be nice too. Plus, the shit storm that will await us when we get back is likely to be of epic proportions, and it would be nice to just have one night together before the lynching commences.> _

_ <Oh light! A shower and a real bed sound like heaven right now… plus, I can’t see how I can be punished for this, the shit storm is all yours.> _

_ <Charming!> _

_ <I promise to break you out of whatever cupboard your mother locks you in.> _

_ <She may dispense with the cupboard and just kill me, that’s if Han doesn’t do it first for taking the Falcon.> _

_ <Maybe they’ll kill you together?> _

_ <If you are trying to put a positive spin on this, you are failing.> _

_ <Sorry. But it’s not like you’ll get expelled or anything, surely? They won’t approve of what you did, but if we go back together they will have to admit that your actions paid off, right?> _

_ <If you look at it logically yes, but I can almost guarantee they won’t. Still, none of that matters right now.> _

_ <I guess it doesn’t… I’m going to try sleeping again, if we get to Tatooine before you catch up, I want to be well rested and as alert as possible.> _

_ <Sounds sensible. Sleep then, little scavenger, I’ll talk to you later.> _

_ <This little scavenger can kick your arse, Kylo Ren, so watch it.> _

Kylo smiled, _ <Yes, dear.> _ He could feel her roll her eyes. _ <I love you.> _

_ <I love you too, you bloody giant.> _

Kylo felt his chest tighten, Rey had called him that the time he had had to coax her off the dorm roof on her first day at Canto Bight.

He felt his own eyes droop and didn’t fight it, and they both fell asleep together.

  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥
> 
> In case you weren’t sure, in British English, (to have) form, is often used to refer to people with a criminal background and/or previous convictions. So that is what Hux means when he said, “It seems Rey has more form than even you knew Kylo.”
> 
> This chapter made me think of the songs:  
> ~Take Me Over by Red  
> ~Let Me Be Your Superhero by Smash Into Pieces  
> ~In All Conscience by Epica  
> ~Return to Life by Leaves' Eyes


	74. Rage, Rage Against The Dying Of The Light

 

Rey’s emotions were a roiling mess inside her as Chewie ( _Wait, Chewie? What?_ ) launched the CEC Class-1 escape pod from the Falcon towards the Supremacy and jumped back out at light speed. _This is a dream._

The battered pod was small and narrow, the tiny space only allowing the occupant to lay exposed on their back, facing outwards, unable to turn, or to defend themself if the need arose.

This was a huge risk, she was going into the belly of the beast, the nexus, the eye of the deadly storm that was the First Order. She was willingly putting her life in the hands of the Darkside.

Yet, that spark of hope inside her that Ben Solo would turn, could not be ignored, it could not be extinguished.  

She had meant what she had told Luke before she left Ahch-To; Ben still had not made his choice, and without Luke, Ben Solo was the last hope of the Resistance. The last hope for the Galaxy.

_This is a dream._ The Force had shown her Ben turning, shown him returning to the Light, and she meant to make sure that that happened.

Fear and doubt whirled inside her, but she trusted the Force, trusted the hope it had given her. And she trusted what she had seen in Ben’s eyes. She wasn’t able to define exactly, what had been there when their fingers touched, perhaps she was afraid to characterise it, or worried she would find more meaning there than was meant, but whatever it had been, it stirred the hope in her heart.

As the pod came to land, her heart beat faster and she measured her breathing carefully. What happened here could rule the fate of many, hers not the least. So she had to stay as calm and reasoned as she could. She had to rescue Ben. _This is a dream._

Yet she could not help her eyes going as wide as they could, could not stop the rush of adrenaline that surged through her as every survival instinct she had nurtured as a scavenger, that had kept her alive all the long years she was alone, told her that she would die here.

The pod hit the floor with a clunk, Rey swallowed and a small gasp escaped her, despite her resolve. _This is a dream._

The outer shell hissed as it was released and then she could see Ben, ( _Kylo_!) through the window set in the hatch.

His gaze was blank, set, as he looked down at her lying there, and she suddenly felt very vulnerable indeed.

Then he moved, no flicker of expression to indicate he would, he just stepped away, gone from her view and into it stepped two Stormtroopers, one held a blaster, the other held a set of rigid durasteel binders. And as the Stormtrooper snapped them open, the meaning was clear; Rey was now a prisoner of the First Order.

_This is a dream..._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

At first Kylo was surprised to find himself back with his doppelgänger, he had assumed they were done, he and Rey’s bond was back, so why was this happening again? _This is a dream._

Then he forgot to be worried about his return to his doppelgänger’s head, when he understood why he was standing, surrounded by Stormtroopers, watching a tiny spaceship thing fly towards them.

Because Rey was on it. Rey was on it and his doppelgänger was standing by and planning on putting cuffs on her the moment she got out. _This is a dream._

Fuck. This _couldn’t_ be real and yet his concern for her, concern for Rey’s doppelgänger, flooded through him.

His doppelgänger’s heart jolted in his chest as he looked down on her when she landed, her eyes were huge in her face, her lips parted unconsciously as she stared up at him.

It was too much, he stepped away abruptly, nodding to the Stormtroopers to get her out and cuff her so he could bring her to Snoke, ( _Snoke?_ ).

Rey didn’t say anything as they walked to the turbo-lift. He could feel she wanted to, but his carefully cultivated demeanor of indifference and the presence of the Stormtroopers put her off. _This is a dream._

Even so, he kept a few paces ahead of them, not wanting to meet her eyes, _not yet._ That would come soon enough and he wasn’t sure he’d ever really be ready. _Stars!_ His doppelgänger was a bloody idiot. _This is a dream._

He waved the Stormtroopers away and guided Rey into the lift alone, with a hand pushing lightly against her back. He turned to face outwards after directing the turbo-lift to the deck Snoke’s throne room was on.

Rey turned to face outwards too, but rather than stand next to him she stepped closer to the door of the lift, so Kylo was looking at her back. _This is a dream._ For a moment they stood silently, the lack of sound loaded with uncertainty, it felt as if the universe had taken a deep, expectant breath.

“You don’t have to do this.” Her voice was quiet but full of compassion, then her head turned to him, but she didn’t yet make eye contact, her tone became stronger, almost accusing as she told him, “I _feel_ the conflict in you, it’s tearing you apart...”

_This is a dream._ Kylo just stared straight ahead, trying not to let her words find meaning within his heart.

“Ben?” She said and he couldn’t stop himself jerking his head slightly, pinning his eyes on her as she turned to face him.

“When we touched hands, I saw your future. Just the shape of it, but solid and clear.” She stepped towards him, closing the gap and the conflict inside of him flared, he wanted her to step nearer, wanted to hear her speak of hope, yet he also wanted gag her and force shove her into the corner, so her eyes could no longer skewer him as they did now. _This is a dream._

“You will not bow to Snoke.” She sounded so sure, but she could not be more wrong, her eyes flicked away from his for a second, downwards, as if she could see his heart through the layers of his clothing and flesh, then they met his again as she said, “You’ll turn…” She was so close now, his head had bowed of its own accord to better take her in, and she whispered, “I’ll help you… _I saw it.”_

In her eyes shone the blind faith, the hopeful fire, that those fools at the Resistance embraced so naïvely.

“I saw something too.” He hated that his voice was not emotionless like it should be, but he forged on, “Because of what I saw, I know that when the moment comes, you will be the one to turn. You’ll stand with me… Rey? I saw who your parents are.”

As he had spoken that fire diminished, uncertainty replacing it, a small frown appeared between her brows as she backed away from him to the lift door. Her actions affected him more than they should, her shrinking away from him.

And then the lift doors opened and and everything around them dissolved. _This is a dream..._

~~~~~~~~~

Rey was drawn into the _Inbetween_ once more. At first she didn’t register that Kylo arrived at the same time. _Her parents?_ He has seen who her… _No._ Not _hers_ , her doubles. _Not hers._ She pushed her fearful curiosity to the back of her mind and focused on the more pressing issue… Surely, _surely_ dream-Kylo would not betray her dream-double? Not after the last dream? That shared experience, though small had seemed to change so much. Had it all been an act on his part? Yet she had felt it, felt the connection, felt the bond flare as they had touched, the rightness of it had been clear…

_ <Are you okay?> _ Kylo engulfed her in light and she embraced it, relieved to just rest in him as his presence calmed her.

_ <Yeah. I just don’t understand what just happened, what is going on?> _

She felt him echo her confusion, _ <I don’t know. I had assumed we would be done with these dreams again. But it appears they are not yet done with us.> _

If Rey were able, she would have sighed and nodded, _ <Yeah, but… what the fuck was your stupid dream-self doing?! He betrayed her! He should have been waiting to leave with her, or I don’t know! Anything other than what he did! She might die!> _

She felt Kylo’s essence flinch and she felt her own fear grow, _ <Kylo, if she dies… what happens to me?> _

He growled and somehow embraced her more closely, _ <She won’t die, I won’t let her. I’ll stop him; somehow, I will.> _

_ <Is that even possible? You said she marked your face before I did, if she dies, will I?> _

_ <No! That will not happen! I can promise you that. She will not die, and neither will you.> _His resolve was iron, unbreakable. Yet she doubted it would make a difference, they had no control there, in that other existence, no tangible influence.

There was _nothing_ she could do. Not _there_. But she could bloody well shape her destiny in her own world, and she would, she would not go gently, she would battle to the the bitter end, wherever that led her and whenever that was, she would rage, she would burn, she would go down fighting, even as death claimed her.

There was a jolt and she realised Kylo was shaking her somehow, _ <Stop thinking like that! It is _ **_not_ ** _going to happen. I am going to rescue you and we are going to go home. End of discussion. > _

He sounded so sure she almost believed him, she muted her doubts, and flooded him with her love and affection instead, _ <Okay.> _

_ <Good… Now, perhaps we should try and sleep normally? I think we both need to.> _

_ <Yeah. Though I’m not sure how to step out of here without external stimulus waking me up.> _

_ <I can try pushing you, if you want? It is more important you get to sleep well, as it is looking like we won’t reach you till Tatooine.> _

_ <I’ve been thinking that too. Okay then, if you are sure.> _

_ <I am. Rest well, and know that I love you and things will be okay> _ and with that, Rey felt herself caught by a wave and carried out of the _Inbetween_ , she was disorientated for a fraction of a second, then her self awareness disappeared, as real sleep took her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kylo floated alone, mulling over what had happened. He had hid his concern from Rey. His thoughts had echoed hers, his scar was testament to the power of their dreams. Yet his resolve was firm, if his doppelgänger didn’t step up and protect Rey’s doppelgänger, he would. Somehow, he would find a way.

And besides, he had felt the warring emotions in his doppelgänger, felt the small flare of hope and surety that Rey would join him. Part of Kylo was almost sure that that hope would mean his doppelgänger would want to keep Rey from harm. Kylo just had to work out how to give him a push in the right direction.

Admittedly, that was easier said than done, but he’d ridden in his doppelgänger’s head quite a bit now, had learned some of his tricks and had seen hints and suggestions of many more. He would make it work, come hell or high water...

Light, he was tired. Even here, it dragged at him. And he found, if he pushed his senses outwards, he was able to pull himself out, though rather than enter sleep he just woke up.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

He sighed tiredly and shifted in his seat, taking a drink from his water bottle that rested in his lap. He could feel Rey was asleep, so at least his push on her had worked.

“You’ve been muttering angrily to yourself for the last ten minutes, though I couldn’t work out most of the words. Everything okay?”

Kylo turned to Finn, the whites of the other boys eyes stood out in the darkness, “Yeah.” He lied, “Everything is fine. I guess I was just dreaming.” He really didn’t fancy explaining everything, and especially not to Finn.

Finn raised an eyebrow at him then shrugged and turned back to watch the road as they sped on into the darkness.

Kylo realised his was chilly and took off his seat belt to pull on his hoodie, it was weird that places that were so hot during daylight were so cold at night, though he supposed it sort of made sense if you really thought about it.

He wondered how Rey had kept warm in Jakku - when she had arrived in Canto Bight she only seemed to have owned short sleeved t shirts, and considering her obsession with sitting on roofs at night to look at the stars, she would have been frozen in Jakku.

How _had_ she survived on her own? The fact that she had, still marvelled him, and he suspected it always would.

A beeping, vibrating noise sounded in the back and he and Finn turned as Hux jerked awake and fumbled his phone out of his pocket to read a message.

A frown appeared on Hux’s face and he grimaced before looking up to regard Kylo and Finn. Face illuminated by the screen, “The collar is apparently pretty much tamper-proof. Unless you have high-tech slicer equipment or are happy giving her an electric shock so strong it would kill her, we _need_ to get that control.”

Kylo felt a flood of frustrated fury surge through him; he really, _really_ wished there was something he could punch right now. There was always Hux, but the weasel was still being useful.

“Fuck.” Finn swore vehemently but softly as the others in the back were asleep, even Javiell.

Kylo nodded agreement, absently wondering why Hux often avoided saying Rey’s name when he spoke of her.

“One of us could perhaps try and infiltrate the Palace, try and get hold of the remote control by stealth. We may have to go in quietly anyway, I don’t think storming the place with the eight of us would work, even with the A.S.W.”

“Did you just say Palace?” Finn asked his voice sounding somewhat strangled.

Hux looked at them with his pale, cold, unreadable eyes, “Yes. Jabba lives in a palace. Crime pays, it seems, and well. I have acquired a rough map of the layout, though we won’t know where she is being held… But, I suspect that won’t be a problem, will it, Ren?”

There was a pregnant pause, in which Kylo and Hux locked gazes. Kylo considered and discarded many responses before he decided he was done with games and dancing around what Hux did or didn’t know, so he answered simply, softly, “No, it won’t.”

Finn and poe both took in a sharp breath but stayed quiet, the atmosphere in the van was charged as Hux continued to hold Kylo’s gaze, he gave the merest of nods, whether it was accepting Kylo’s answer or to congratulate himself on confirmation of his guess, Kylo was not sure.

Zainmar sat up suddenly and coughed and the moment was lost, the tension diffused. Hux’s eyes flicked away from Kylo’s as he pocketed his phone and took a mouthful of water from his own bottle.

“Is something going on?” Zainmar asked, still half asleep.

Kylo shook his head, “No. Go back to sleep, Zain.” He gave Zainmar a reassuring nod, then turned back to face the road again.

Whatever just happened, it felt significant, and he couldn't help feeling that things would be coming to a head, and soon.

He leant his head against the window as he looked out at the stars, there were so many more here visible than in Canto Bight.

As they traveled on into the night, he comforted his churning thoughts with the fact that, even though she wasn’t here, Rey traveled under the same sky as him.

  


_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

_Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray._   
_Do not go gentle into that good night._ _  
_ Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

 

_~Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas_

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Holy shit biscuits, this just went over 200,00 words. I have no idea how this happened. Also, sorry this is rather short!
> 
> ~Tomorrow We Fight (feat. Svrcina) by Tommee Profitt  
> ~Stay by Shakespear's Sister  
> ~When Tomorrow Comes by Eurythmics
> 
> Also, *coughs* shameless self promotion *coughs* I posted a new (smutty) oneshot. It is perhaps a bit weird. But if you’ve read this far, (yay! Thank you ♥ ) you probably know to expect that. Mind the tags. [Red And Black And The Little Vixen](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14821065)
> 
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ^_^


	75. A Wretched Hive Of Scum and Villainy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Use of shock collar, groping

Rey jerked awake with a start. Something felt wrong. There was an edge of _something_ in the air around her, an expectation, a warning.

The van was still moving but had slowed down considerably. She rubbed her eyes then moved over to her spyhole, it was daylight and they were negotiating the roads of a town surrounded by other, rather battered looking cars. There were also people riding camels and horses, the riders and pedestrians were ragged, hard eyed and shifty looking. The buildings were basic, dun coloured, built in an unrefined rustic style.

This place looked so like Niima, so like Jakku. Rey swallowed thickly, this must be Tatooine. They had arrived then; it wouldn’t be long now.

She quickly got dressed and downed her water, aware of her pressing need to pee, but wanting to stay hydrated.

She checked her rudimentary weapon and lock pick, adjusted her bra and slipped into the cold void.

Kylo was asleep, she was surprised the sense that had awoken her had not roused him too, but she was thankful for it. Right now, she needed to be as focused as possible. She knew of Jabba the Hutt, knew the Hutt family, knew the Fett twins, but that didn’t mean she had any idea what they had to do with her or what would happen to her when she left the van. She had to be ready for anything.

As she settled down cross legged facing the door, the coldness suffused her completely and she could feel vibrations humming in the air all around her, echoing sparks, yet though they seemed within reach, they evaded her every time she reached for them.

Irritation skittered across the void but couldn’t stick, not when she was immeshed so deeply. She had other options; she had relied on herself for long enough that she knew she didn’t need the force she shared with Kylo to survive. _Still,_ it would have been helpful.

The van finally parked and she heard both doors of the cab slam. _This was it._ She braced herself, straightened her spine, let her face settle into a cool, bland expression and watched as the door opened, blinding her momentarily with the glare of a desert morning.

“Out.”

Rey did as ordered, moving a step to the side so they could shut the door again as she blinked rapidly, willing her eyes to recover.

The Twins both studied her, dark faces and dark eyes as unreadable as ever.

“You will walk between us. If you do anything other than walk,” one said, “I will shock you. If you speak, I will shock you. If I feel like it, I will shock you. Do you understand?”

Rey merely nodded, enjoying the strong sunlight on her skin, despite herself, she really had missed that all encompassing, scorching heat.

The Twin who had spoken grunted, then exchanged a look with the other one, before they started walking.

The compound they were in was large, surrounded by a wall about twelve feet tall, there were a few smaller buildings dotted haphazardly around, but the Twin in front of her was heading to the main building, it was three stories tall with a flat roof on either side of a dome in the centre.

The van wasn’t the only vehicle, the others were mostly pick ups or jeeps, the sort of car that could easily off road, there were a couple of sleeker looking cars, but they would be harder to hotwire. Her study was interrupted by a sharp shock from the collar.

“Eyes down.” The Twin walking behind her said.

Rey dropped her head, but flickered her eyes around from under her lashes, ignoring the pain, it was nothing.

They got to the main door and were halted by two men who held assault rifles, there were long knives attached to their belts. Rey’s fingers itched.

“Jango, Boba, nice of you to join us. Took you long enough,” one of the men said. Rey didn’t raise her eyes to his face but watched as the Fett in front of her tensed his shoulders very slightly. _Interesting._

The same man turned and pushed one of the large doors open slightly, “Grondo, Tora, get out here.”

There was a pause and then they were joined by two other men who carried knives but no guns.

The two new men patted down the Fett’s, then one turned towards Rey.

_Shit._ Her makeshift weapon would be hard to find but the lock pick would be unlikely to evade a decent pat down. One of the twins put a restraining hand on the man, stopping him.

“That isn’t necessary, we did that when we loaded her.” His voice was low, a thread of irritation colouring it.

“Orders are orders, Jango. Step aside.”

Rey lifted her head, this was going to be unpleasant and probably painful. The man grabbed her chin and every instinct in her yelled at her to defend herself, she suppressed it, the cold void was the only weapon she could currently use.

“Fuck, she’s a cool one, or maybe just stupid.” The guy laughed over his shoulder as he knelt to check her boots, then patted up her legs.

Rey ignored the places his hands lingered, staring straight ahead but seeing nothing. He missed the grip-pin and small sharp piece of metal- they were too small to really feel through denim, but then his hands were on her chest, her stomach clenched as he paused. “Must be my lucky day,” he chuckled as his hands slipped under her top and into her bra, he pulled the cardboard wrapped van-made lock pick out and tossed it to someone behind him. Rey refused to acknowledge him as he slipped his hand back inside her top to check her other bra cup, his questing fingers lingering slightly.

Then she jerked and gasped as the collar shocked her, it happened again and again, by the sixth she had righted herself, embracing it as much as she could, her breathing coming in pants.

“Where did you get that?” One of the Twins asked her, coming into her field of vision, her eyes were blurred, he grabbed her jaw and brought his eyes inches away from hers, “ _Where?_ ” he was angry, she had made them look like fools in front of men who had already disrespected them, he shocked her again whilst still holding her face.

“I made it, from part of my bra.” She hissed.

He cocked his head at her, then gestured to his brother who took out a knife and cut her bra straps then reached under her top and yanked it down and out. _Fuck._ They found her weapon quickly, there was perhaps the barest hint of amusement in their eyes under the anger that bubbled there.

“I don’t think she’s stupid,” one of the guards joked, Rey suppressed a snarl.

Her chin was released and she was pushed inside; the main building was very different on the inside, the floor was cool marble, the walls were painted in creams and golds and were decorated with paintings in muted colours, statues of horses, hounds and nude women were dotted around.

They were met by a smartly dressed man who had a leather shoulder holster sporting two handguns, his amber eyes regarded them coldly from a surprisingly pale face.

“This is the girl?” He grimaced, “She’s disgusting. Boba, take her to the slave quarters and give her to Oola; Jango, Jabba is in the in the main lounge.”

Rey wondered what he had expected - she’d been stuck in the back of a fucking van for four  days, and they had travelled through the desert!

One of the Twin’s, she supposed it was Boba, pushed her towards the right, “Walk beside me, eyes down.”

Rey carefully made a map in her head as they walked, soon they were heading up some back stairs and the decoration changed to plain and rough as they entered a makeshift seating area in some empty space at the top of the stairs, Rey stopped beside Boba.

“Oola. Make her presentable. Don’t take long, Jabba is waiting. And watch her, she is trouble.”

Rey looked up as Boba handed the collar remote control over to a woman; she was short, with sloe coloured eyes, two very thick, long dark ponytails... and she was utterly beautiful. But also, very, _very_ underdressed. The dress she wore was low necked, showing a huge amount of cleavage and although it stopped just above her anklers, the hip high slits left little to the imagination.

“Presentable how?” The woman asked as she pursed lovely full lips and studied Rey, “What’s she here for?”

“Hostage not dancer or servant.” Boba replied then turned and disappeared back down the stairs.

“All right then, hostage. Come with me. Don’t make me shock you,” She gestured to her own collar, “I don’t like to, but I will.”

Rey considered for a brief second taking her chances, the woman must have seen something in her eyes because she shook her head slightly, “I wouldn’t. This isn’t the only control, if there was only one I would have been out of here years ago.”

Rey grimaced, then nodded, “I really have to pee.”

“We can do that first. Then you are taking a shower.” Oola’s nose wrinkled slightly and Rey shrugged then followed the other woman as she started down a narrow corridor lined with doors.

At the end they entered a large bathroom, the showers were just communal ones, no privacy, but at least the two loos had shower curtains in front of them.

When Rey was done, Oola gestured to the showers, “There is shampoo and stuff in the dispensers.”

She leaned back against the wall and crossed her arms, clearly she was staying. Rey batted her discomfort down, at least it was a woman.

She turned her back to Oola and stripped quickly, took her hair out, then walked into the shower area and started the water, it was luke warm, there was no temperature control but when it was this hot, that wasn’t too much of a problem.

Rey was too aware of Oola’s eyes and her current predicament to enjoy getting clean, she washed herself mechanically and quickly. The scents of the cleansing agents were surprisingly nice, with hints of honey, patchouli, and mint, but they stung when they got in the cut one of the Twin’s had made on her arm.

When Rey was done, she turned her head to Oola but kept her body facing away, “Can I have a towel, please?”

Oola snorted in amusement, “With a brand and scars like that, I thought you’d be used to this by now.” But she went and pulled one out of a cupboard and threw it at Rey, who had to turn slightly to catch it before hastily wrapping it around herself. “I’ll need to bind that cut on your arm, it’s bleeding. Who owns you anyway?”

Rey gave her a flat look, “ _No one_ owns me.”

Oola raised an eyebrow then shrugged, “Come with me and I’ll get you something to wear.” It was then that Rey noticed her clothes and boots were gone. They were literally stripping her of _everything._ Including the fucking grip pin and sharp metal.

“My old ones are fine.” She said as she flashed her eyes around the room, hoping to spy them.

Oola shook her head, “No one keeps what they came in. They’re gone. Now come, don’t make me shock you.”

Rey pulled the coldness back around her - it had slipped slightly, then followed Oola out. They didn’t go far, just a few doors down into a large room that held racks and racks of various items of clothing, benches and a shelf with deodorant and other necessaries on.

Rey looked at what Oola was wearing and grimaced, “Can I have trousers instead of a dress?”

Oola laughed, “I guess so. Never had to dress a female hostage before, usually they’re male. Generally any women who arrive don’t leave here,” there was a tinge of bitterness as she said that, “Let me look at your wound.” Rey showed her her arm and Oola nodded, “One of the Fetts’? You got off lightly. Hopefully Jabba will send them back out and they’ll forget about you.”

Oola smeared some bacta on it before quickly wrapping it in a bandage, then moved around as she pulled out leggings, a sleeveless tunic and underwear, all in a light cream coloured material. The contrast to the casual clothes the guards had been wearing was stark. At least Unkar had let her wear whatever she wanted.

“Change quickly.” Oola said as she handed the pile to Rey.

Rey nodded and moved away and dumped the pile on a bench, again turning her back to Oola as she quickly dried herself and dressed. “What about shoes?”

“You aren’t going outside the compound, so you don’t need them.”

This really was not going well, but Rey would make it work, she had to, there simply was no other option.

When she was done Oola looked her over and nodded, “Okay, sit down and I’ll do your hair, it looks knotty and I’m fast at getting them out.” Rey opened her mouth to protest but Oola spoke over her, “Just sit,” she commanded as she flashed the collar remote at Rey, “The longer we take, the more likely _I_ get shocked as well as you.”

Rey let loose an irritated sigh, but sat, wincing as Oola combed out the snarls and tangles then braided it. The feeling made her think of Maritan; though Maritan had always been so gentle... Rey swallowed the lump in her throat. _Light, why couldn’t she keep the coldness in place today?_ Perhaps it was because she was out of her own clothes and without the tools she’d made herself.

Oola was as good as her word and did indeed finish quickly, “Come on. Time to meet the Hutt.” She said as she started for the door to the corridor, “Some words of advice, keep your eyes on the floor, don’t talk unless absolutely sure you’ve been asked a question, and stand completely still, no matter what.”

No matter what, _what_ ? Rey wondered... but was distracted as Kylo shattered her fragile cool, _ <Rey?> _

_ <Hey, I’ve arrived. I can’t really talk right now, I’m sorry, I need to concentrate. I’ll check in with you every hour or so, but otherwise I need to focus.> _

_ <Shit! Okay, but… have they hurt you?> _

_ <No. I gotta go.> _

Rey sunk back down into the cool state of nothing as fast as she could, as deeply as was currently possible. Kylo really didn’t need to know about the things that had happened in the last hour. It would help nothing and Rey really didn’t need to hear or feel his anger. _She had to let everything go._

In the entrance hall they were met by the Twins again and Oola handed over the remote control.

“Any trouble?” One asked her.

“She was fine.” Oola told them before giving Rey a slight nod and walking back the way they had come.

The Twin grunted, then gripped her elbow, “Come. Eyes down.”

They started down the corridor to the left, the room they entered was large and airy, there were two large fans going, and a woman dressed in even less than Oola was dancing suggestively to the jazz music playing in the background, on a round raised platform in one corner.

Everything seemed to be made of gold, ivory or marble, except the couches and chairs which were covered in dark red and orange silks. There was a hint of hashish in the air, despite the fans.

Rey dropped her eyes quickly before she could be shocked again and the Twin holding her arm guided her around a low gilded coffee table and halted her in front of a large reclining chair.

“This is the girl,” the Twin not holding Rey said, in a respectful voice.

“Is it? Look at me, girl.” The voice was slow and lazy.

Rey raised her chin and eyed the man responsible for her kidnap. He was huge and revolting, short of stature which accentuated his size, he had the deep tan of the desert born with cold yellow brown eyes.

“Such defiance!” He chuckled as he studied her, “I can understand why you requested to break her, Jango. I imagine the challenge would have been greatly entertaining for you two.” He met Rey’s eyes, “Luckily for you, my dear, or perhaps unluckily - time will only tell, someone else has a prior claim. Now, turn around and show me your brand.”

Rey let out a silent sigh and turned, lifting up her top just enough for her brand to be visible, He tutted to himself, “This Unkar Plutt really should be more _neat_ with his property, really, it’s hardly legible. Turn back.”

Rey did so and he studied her for some moments, and as she hadn’t been told to drop her eyes again, she met him stare for stare, her eyes empty and cold, his calculating, as he tapped one fat finger against his blubbery lips.

“Jurga? Is Rancor still in the compound?” He said after a few moments, his lips curving slightly as he continued to hold Rey’s gaze.

The slave who had been standing still as a statue behind his chair answered, “He is, my lord.”

“Good, good. Our intelligence mentioned this one is a scrapper, I had assumed that was Unkar exaggerating, but now, I find myself... _curious_... and I grow bored with Zham’s dancing.”

The woman dancing froze, a fearful look painting her features as the music abruptly stopped, Jabba lazily waved his hand in her direction and she was suddenly writhing on the floor, scrabbling at her collar.

Rey turned her eyes away to look back at Jabba, who was watching the woman convulsing, licking his lips.

When the woman’s movements was reduced to blank eyed twitching, Jabba looked away and gave Rey a greasy smile, then looked behind her. “Jango, take this one to the arena would you?”

Rey did _not_ like where this was going, admittedly she hadn’t liked how the last five days had gone, but even so…

“Eyes down.” Jango said as he pulled Rey’s elbow. _Really?_ Still with the fucking eyes? _Shut up brain!_ **Focus.**

As she walked, she listened to Jango and Boba have what was obviously an argument, conversing in a cant she found trouble following. All she managed to glean was that they were irritated Jabba had denied them time alone with her but was allowing Rancor, who was apparently a giant, to fight her. _Well this was just fucking great._

Rey assumed it would be to first blood, or something similar, otherwise, what had been the point of kidnapping her? So she had a dilemma; did she go down easy or go down fighting? In theory, (so long as it _was_ to first blood) going down easy would probably mean less pain, and also mean they’d underestimate her in the future… but she was at her limit of taking shit lying down, she had a poisonous build up of frustrated rage and at some point soon, she was going to snap. If she allowed herself free rein in this, she may manage to keep her cool for a while longer, because at the moment, her iron grip had turned slippery slick. _Blood and bloody fucking ashes._

The arena wasn’t large, perhaps fifteen foot square, surrounded by chain link, there were wooden benches on two sides, the entrance was another side and on the opposite was what must be Jabba’s seating area, with a large padded seat shaded by an awning.

The Twin’s took her to a brick built shed off to the side, “Choose your weapon.”

Rey looked up at whichever one spoke, “He is big? What are the rules?”

His lips curved very slightly, “Huge. First blood, but he usually ignores that rule, you have three minutes to choose and don’t even think of trying anything.” He said as the other Twin casually drew a handgun and unclicked the safety.

Rey nodded absently as she went back to look at the array of weapons, there was a decent looking staff, but that would likely prove useless in this instance… _So._ Her focus zeroed down to nothing, and finally, _finally,_ the cold void was absolute and she let her instincts guide her as she picked up a narrow bladed, double edged long knife and hefted it. The weight felt good, comforting. It almost felt as if she had had a missing limb returned to her and she realised she was smiling slightly as she moved back to the Twins.

“That’s it?” One asked and she shrugged, he snorted and he and his brother exchanged more words but Rey didn’t bother listening this time, she was revelling in the emptiness, as her thumb idly caressed the hilt of the knife.

“Do I have permission to warm up?”

She received an amused nod and immediately started stretching, she had no idea how much time she’d have and her muscles had been grossly under used in the last few days.

The harsh morning sun kissed her skin as she worked, but it couldn’t touch her frozen heart, this was a perfect moment in the madness for her.

A small shock to her collar pulled her out of her stretching to find the benches occupied and Jabba ensconced under his awning.

And there was a monster of a man already in the arena. He was a good six or seven inches taller than Kylo, and he made Kylo look slender. He was dressed in nothing but loose shorts, his darkly tanned skin, sweat slicked, straining over muscles covered in gang tattoos.

He was huge, he would be crushingly strong, but he would also be slow and inflexible. Rey breathed out calmly as she entered the arena and heard the gate close behind her. She stopped on the edge, allowing the raucous laughter at her appearance to wash over her. She was as cold as ice and ten times as hard.

Someone called the crowd to order, Rey breathed out.

“To the first blood!” There was derisive laughter and Rey noticed Rancor was _not_ wearing a collar, which meant he wouldn’t be stopped easily if he got carried away.

Rey breathed out.

“No rules!”

Rancor’s weapon was a wide, heavy, slightly curved sword, almost like a shamshir on steroids.

It was still sheathed at his side, the way he stood implied he didn’t think he needed it. Assumption was a quick path to death.

Rey breathed out.

“ _Dokoi!_ ”

All the sound was gone, all Rey could see was the man in front of her as he roared with laughter at her.

He never stood a chance.

  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My S.O. suggested, ‘Out of the frying van and into the fire,’ as a chapter title. I lol’d.
> 
> Dokoi = Fight in Huttese
> 
> Songs in my head:  
> Lose Yourself by Eminem  
> I Am a Stone by Demon Hunter  
> Enjoy! By Angel Dust 
> 
> ...Guess which genius dislocated their shoulder during the night on Sunday and completely fucked their arm up? Yeah. So, typing is slow going. Sorry T_T  
> [Autonomee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Autonomee/pseuds/Autonomee) is my Beta ♥


	76. Give Me Strength, At Least Give Me A Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Violent deaths

  

Rey embraced the cold, emotionless void fully as she ran straight towards Rancor, gripping the knife in her right hand, point down.

The adrenaline rushing through her system was electrifying, in that moment, power seemed to rush through her and she angled her trajectory to Rancor’s left side as she sprang off her feet at an angle that brought her left hand to grip his right trapezius and stabbed down into the space between his collarbone and left trapezius. His massive hands gripped her sides, squeezing her rib cage in a crushing grip as he roared, but she sank the knife all the way in before she pulled it out again, his grip slackened, and she swung her body to the side so she landed behind him as he staggered forwards for a few seconds, gasping, then dropped like a stone to fall face first on the ground as his heart’s blood leaked into the hot sand.

There was a shocked silence as Rey lifted her head and stared into the wide, furious eyes of Jabba the Hutt.

Her veins were still buzzing, her limbs trembling in reaction and in anticipation of more movement; her body was urging her to fight, to _run,_ but she was caught in a cage. If she climbed the chain link, which would be just _so_ easy, all they’d have to do was shock her.

So she stood, breathing deeply, heart pumping as the other spectators started yelling and laughing, then some arguments broke out as bets were reneged on…

A shot rang out and silence descended as Jabba opened his mouth to speak. “The instruction was to first blood,” his voice had turned deep and menacing.

It was not really a question but Rey answered anyway, shrugging as she held up the knife blade that was still dripping slightly into the sand by her bare feet, “That was the first blood I shed.”

And it was true, everyone knew it, but it didn’t mean they would accept it. Jabba’s eyelids twitched as his fat lips thinned as much was as was probably possible, he gestured with one large meaty hand, and Rey’s collar came to life.

The electricity caused her muscles to spasm, her grip on the knife became tighter and tighter as she hit the ground, body writhing, breath gasping, heart shuddering against her ribs. But she kept her screams inside, she grasped the icy void in a strangle hold, unwilling to let Kylo feel this, then darkness rushed up, pulling her under, to the sweet oblivion of unconsciousness.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

At first Kylo had thought Rey had been killed, her presence in his head had gone from cold and remote to simply empty.

In his panic he reached deeper than he ever had before in the hopes he could somehow pull her out, drag her life back to the land of the living; but then he _felt_ her.

She wasn’t dead, she was just so deep in the icy depths that he was barely aware of her without extending his senses considerably.

_Not dead, not dead, not dead_ … The rush of relief almost made him faint, he swallowed bile as he blinked back tears.

His panic only receded slightly, _what the hell was happening to her?_ They were about ten hours away from reaching Tatooine _, what if they arrived too late?_

His heart thudded painfully in his chest as he held onto the freezing, tenuous thread of their connection.

Minutes passed, the car was quiet, everyone who could, was sleeping, just Hux and Javiell were awake, Hux because he was driving and Javiell because he was keeping an eye on Hux.

Then there came a trickle, a thin lancing wire of pain, that grew and grew until it crashed over him in a wave and he was screaming inside his head, because he could _feel_ it, feel a fire that seemed to burn every nerve in his body, but it wasn’t _his,_ it was _Rey’s_ and Kylo was dragged into darkness with her...

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey turned as the lift doors opened behind her to reveal an austere, echoing chamber. A wide glossy black walkway opened out onto a wide platform, a considerable drop either side, at the far end sat a throne raised up on a dais. And on that throne, sat a true monster. _This is a dream._

To either side of the throne stood eight figures clad in ornate crimson armor, various weapons at the ready, but Rey only had eyes for the being garbed in a long gold robe, who was casually slouched on the throne.

She could not look away, even as dream-Kylo captured her elbow and started walking her forwards.

“Well done, my good and faithful apprentice,” Kylo let go of her elbow but she carried on a few steps, as if drawn, “My faith in you is restored.” _This is a dream._

Rey stopped at those words, _could she be wrong? Could the Force be wrong? Had this all somehow been a Darksiders trick?_

The being on the throne looked at her, he was humanoid, but taller and withered, pale eyes honing in on her, sunken into a ravaged, horribly scarred face. His voice moved like gravel across her skin as he spread his arms out in a parody of welcome, “Young Rey, welcome.” His smile made her stomach flip and sink as he clasped his hands together in his lap and pinned her with his gaze. _This is a dream._

She could feel his power, the dark energy radiating off him like warmth from a star, it made her want to vomit.

She gazed back at him, at Snoke, ( _Snoke? … wait, could it be_ **_he,_ ** _who was behind all this?_ ), keeping the fear off her face, as she gave him a flat glare, which was the best she could do at that moment.

The heavy binders on her wrists beeped and unclasped, falling to the floor with a metallic clunk and she unconsciously flexed her aching wrists. _This is a dream._

“Come closer, child,” Rey mulishly stayed where she was, “So much strength, Darkness rises and Light to meet it.” As he spoke he raised one hand then the other and brought them together, he was clearly enjoying himself, his satisfaction oozed like tar, thick and black. He rested his arms on on the sides of his throne as he continued, “I warned my young apprentice that as he grew stronger, his equal in the light would rise.” He gestured languidly with his right hand and her lightsaber, _Luke’s_ lightsaber flew past her head to land in his hand and he wrapped his gnarled fingers around it. “Skywalker” he chuckled, “I assumed, _wrongly._ ”

He placed the hilt down next to him on the wide arm of the throne, then looked back at her, “Closer I said.” Rey didn’t move but she felt herself being grasped and she slowly moved towards him, her feet barely above the ground. _This is a dream._

Yet even here, even in the force grip of an immeasurably powerful Darksider, with all the odds seemingly stacked against her, she refused to submit, to give in, _to lose hope._

“You underestimate Skywalker,” she told him, her voice ringing strong and clear in the echoing space, “and Ben Solo, _and_ me. It will be your downfall.”

Snoke gasped, “Oh, have you seen something? A weakness in my apprentice? Is that why you came?” _This is a dream._

For a nano second Rey felt a spark of triumph, but there was a sneer to his mouth, and then he was laughing at her…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was in agony, furiously trying to wrest control away from his doppelgänger; he watched helplessly as Rey was taunted by Snoke, _(did this mean that their world Snoke was behind his Rey’s kidnap? But why?)_ … _This is a dream._

His doppelgänger was fighting him, fighting the conflict inside him that was tearing him apart inside, and yet he did _nothing_. Kylo knew his doppelgänger felt something for Rey, even if he’d hidden it deeply, even if he hated himself for the weakness, he was drawn to her Light, to her soul, to the way her power beat against his mind, insistent and mesmerising.

He watched the scene unfold, still kneeling, paying homage to a monster that tortured him on a regular basis, _was this Kylo so broken that he thought that was acceptable? Or just so hungry for power that he thought it worth suffering through?_ It didn’t matter, if he wanted pain for himself, Kylo didn’t care, but when it came to Rey, Kylo would not, _could not_ accept it. And so he railed on as Snoke spoke. _This is a dream._

Then Snoke chuckled and said something to Rey that claimed Kylo’s undivided attention and sent his doppelgänger into freefall inside, “Young fool, it was I, who bridged your minds.”

His doppelgänger looked up from where he had been studying the floor tiles, his breathing coming faster, as Snoke continued, “I stoked Ren’s conflicted soul, I knew _he_ was not strong enough to hide it from you, and _you_ were not wise enough to resist the bait.”

Anger started burning in the pit of his doppelgänger’s stomach, he’d been manipulated, _yet again,_ he’d been _used_ ; he’d been wrestling with himself over _nothing,_ over something that he was actually blameless for … but, it hadn’t really been nothing had it? _Had it?_

Snoke laughed, ever pitiless, as he drew Rey close enough to him to touch, his ancient fingers reached for Rey’s cheek in the disgusting imitation of a caress, “And now, _you_ , will give _me_ , Skywalker, then I will kill you, with the cruelest stroke.” _This is a dream._

_NO! No, no, no, no, no!_ Kylo redoubled his efforts, desperation driving him. He heard Rey spit “No!” in Snokes face, heard Snoke’s whispery growled reply of “Yes…”

And then Rey was flying into the air, a small, involuntary cry of “No!” coming from her as she rose, she gasped as she struggled vainly to get free of Snoke’s power.

Kylo and his doppelgänger both watched, him almost mindless with fear and his doppelgänger trying and failing not to be afraid for her, not to feel _anything_ for her.

Snoke’s voice a vicious rasp as he slowly told Rey, “ _Give... me... everything_.”

Rey’s body bowed under the pressure of Snoke’s mind as she screamed, it was a raw, gut wrenching sound. _This is a dream._

Kylo’s doppelgänger dropped his eyes back to the floor, trying to ignore as Rey screeched, the sound grating on his bones, clawing at his heart.

The sound seemed to go on forever, reverberating in his doppelgänger’s mind, Kylo had never felt so helpless, so utterly useless.

Was she dying? Was this killing her? _For the love of the Light and all the Stars, do something you feckless cretin! Snoke didn’t bridge your minds, that happened when you interrogated her on Starkiller, he is lying to you! She is probably the only person in the whole fucking galaxy that could ever love you and you are letting him KILL HER._ **STOP HIM!**

A tremble shuddered through his doppelgänger’s mind, and for the first time, Kylo was sure that he had been heard clearly. _This is a dream._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

After what could have been hours or seconds, Rey was released from the unbearable grip of Snoke’s mind. He had seen _everything,_ been through _everything_ . The invasion made her feel ill and unbalanced… She was surprised she was still alive, that her brain hadn’t turned to liquid under his unyielding pressure, and just poured out of her ears in a thick soup. _This is a dream._

Snoke chuckled, clearly deeply amused by what he’d seen, “Oh well, well; I did not expect Skywalker to be, so _wise_.” Rey looked up at him, feeling her fury rise from the ashes of his assault.

Snoke drew a deep, satisfied breath in, “After the rebels are gone, we will go to his planet and obliterate the entire island.”

_No!_ The thought of this, _this_ _thing,_ going anywhere near that sacred place made her blood boil. She snarled and was up on her feet and calling Luke’s lightsaber to her in seconds, still unwilling to give up. _This is a dream._

It didn’t work, it flew past her outstretched hand, then hit her on the back of her head, _which bloody hurt,_ Snoke it appeared, was a petty, low rent bully, as well as an all powerful Darksider.

The lightsabre came to rest back on the arm of his throne, “ _Such spunk_ , look here now.” His voice was low and menacing, Rey felt herself be picked up, _yet again_ and propelled forwards to a window where a magnifier was positioned, the shutter on the window was pulled back, showing a group of tiny, unshielded lifeboats, being shot down one by one, “The entire resistance, on those transports, soon they will all be gone.”

Rey felt a wave of horror and despair, _Finn!_ All those _lives,_ being snuffed out… her hope flickered like a guttering flame. _This is a dream._

Snoke’s voice was a triumphant purr, “For you, all is lost.”

Snoke was like a cat, toying with a tiny mouse, but this mouse had claws, and she was not done fighting, _she never would be._

Rey turned away from the destruction happening out in the black and summoned Kylo Ren’s lightsaber from his belt, igniting it as soon as it was in her hand as she glared daggers at Snoke, her breathing was hitching in angry panicked gasps as she thought of all those Rebels lives being taken right this moment. Her hatred for him licked across her skin, through her veins.

The red guards around the room immediately readied their weapons and turned to face her, yet Snoke waved a hand, keeping the guards in place, if anything he seemed amused by her actions, “Oh! Still that fiery spit of hope. You have the spirit of a true Jedi!”

She was going to ram her hope straight down his scrawny throat! Rey charged, letting loose a furious, anguished howl as she went. _This is a dream._

But it was not to be, she was _too weak_ on her own, all it took was the flick of Snoke’s hand and she was sailing away to land on her back and the lightsaber left her hand.

“And because of that, you must die.” Snokes voice was almost gentle.

It didn’t come as a shock, she had known it was likely, but she had _hoped_ … well. She had hoped for so much more, but here she was, seemingly at the ending of all things, all things good anyway, _perhaps it was best_ , a life in a galaxy run by the First Order, without the Rebels, without _Finn_ … Her heart hurt, she had been so sure Ben would turn, but the Force it seemed, could be wrong.

Yet that hope, that fiery spit of hope, as Snoke had so aptly put it, still burned within her… _This is a dream._

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

His doppelgänger’s lightsaber spun out of Rey’s grasp when she hit the floor, and came spinning across the black tiles to come to rest in front of him. _You must die, you must die_ … The words repeated in his doppelgänger’s head, in his, and they both knew, that that was not what they wanted. _But was that enough?_ His doppelgänger had already proven that he would do anything for Snoke, even when he didn’t want to. _This is a dream._

He’d killed his own father, after all, and that death had almost undone him, he had almost unraveled over it, reliving the memory again and again, feeling the fingers of a deadman caress his face as if it were happening once more… Could he survive killing Rey? _No!_

Snoke gestured and Rey was forced onto her knees before him, and _oh,_ how his doppelgänger had dreamt of this moment, of _her_ , kneeling before him, _finally_ submitting to him. _But she isn’t submitting to you, this is all Snoke… and why would you want her like this, when you could have her by your side, have her wanting to be with you? She is the only one, the bond is true,_ **_real,_ ** _not something Snoke did, it means something,_ **_she_ ** _means something._

_This is a dream._ Rey was panting, straining against the invisible bonds that held her, even now unwilling to die easily... _she was so like his Rey it made his heart ache. He had to save her, he had to save them both._

Kylo looked up as Snoke started speaking, “My worthy Apprentice, Son of Darkness, Heir apparent to Lord Vader, where there was conflict, I now sense resolve, where there was weakness...” Kylo’s doppelgänger looked back down at Rey, was she his weakness? “...Strength, complete your training and fulfil your destiny.” _This is a dream._

_No,_ Rey was his strength, she had come here, into danger, into the pit of darkness, _for him._ How could he repay her with death? _Yes!_ Kylo urged his doppelgänger on. My destiny… My destiny here, now... is to kill Snoke.

Kylo’s doppelgänger bent down slowly to pick up his lightsaber, there was a heaviness to the force around them, as if it knew something truly momentous was about to happen, something galaxy changing. _This is a dream._

He took the few steps to where Rey knelt, panting as she looked up at him with wide, frightened eyes, but there was defiance there too, _it was almost as if he could see his Rey peeking through._

“I know what I have to do,” his doppelgänger said quietly, as he prepared himself, suddenly ensnared by the depth of feeling in her eyes. _This is a dream._

Kylo’s heart almost broke when she answered in a panicky whisper, “Ben?”

Snoke’s arrogant laugh brought his focus back, “You think you can turn him? Pathetic child, I cannot be betrayed, I cannot be beaten.”

Kylo gazed down at her as Snoke spoke, the bond, the Force seemed to sing with the rightness of his decision. _This is a dream._

“I see his mind, I see his every intent… _yes_.. I see him turning the lightsabre to strike true.”

As Snoke spoke, Kylo’s doppelgänger held out his lightsaber hilt at the ready, but they _both_ used his left hand to turn Luke’s lightsaber silently to point at Snoke.

“And now, foolish child, he ignites it” Snoke said, the roared, “and kills his true enemy!”

And they did, he ignited Luke’s saber and it sliced straight through the monstrosity sitting on the throne. _This is a dream._

Snoke’s grip on Rey failed and she fell to the floor, the surprise on Snoke’s face was an image both Kylo’s would cherish for some time. _Pride comes before a fall,_ Kylo thought, _and oh, what a fall._

Kylo flicked his fingers and Luke’s sabre sailed towards them, towards he and Rey. She grabbed the hilt as it came to her, grip firm on the hilt, as Snokes bisected body fell to the floor.

The look Rey gave him as she stood, made his shattered soul sing, they had no time for words, but they didn’t really need any, the look was everything. _This is a dream._

He ignited his lightsaber as the Praetorian Guards rushed towards them and he and Rey both simultaneously spun with their backs to each other, as they prepared to fight for their lives, _together at last._

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_She was alive._ Rey almost couldn’t believe it. Ben had done it, _Kylo had done it!_ As she grabbed the hilt of her lightsabre and stood, her eyes were full of him, the solemnity of his expression, the wealth of emotion in his eyes as he gazed at her and ignited his lightsaber… her heart swelled in her chest, her hope was renewed, her conviction justified. _This is a dream._

They didn’t have time for words, the red clad guards were rushing them with vengeance on their minds, weapons at the ready.

She and Ben turned so they were back to back as they raised their weapons to meet their attackers.

The weapons they wielded withstood the blade of a lightsaber, their armour was tough, so tough that a only a direct thrust was effective, a glancing blow was merely deflected. And there were eight of them. _This is a dream._

Rey’s focus zeroed down to her lightsaber and their weapons as she met them blow for blow, desperately trying the work out their weak spots as she fought.

The sound of their weapons meeting buzzed and echoed in the huge chamber around them. She and Kylo stayed back to back, trusting each other to keep their unprotected sides safe, using each others bodies to gain the advantage over their opponents. It was as if they were one mind, one body, with one purpose: to survive. _This is a dream._

The guards seemed to realised this however and they worked to split she and Kylo up.

Two came at her, one with a double bladed polearm, she landed a solid blow and they fell back, leaving her with one who snapped what Rey had thought was a electro rapier into something resembling a whip, it caught the blade of her lightsaber and held on as the guard used it to reel her in towards the deadly point. Despite her straining muscles, she got closer and closer to them until they were able to grip her neck in their fist, exerting even more strength into pulling her onto the hissing point at the end of the whip. _This is a dream._

With one last desperate heave, Rey threw them off, bringing her lightsaber around and up to piece them under the armpit, a mortal blow. Rey turned and threw the whip still attached to her lightsaber at the far wall, sparks flying as it travelled then hit the wall in flames.

Before the body had even stilled the one with the double bladed polearm was up, they separated their weapon, now armed with one blade in each hand.

Rey flourished her lightsaber at them as they came, releasing a roar as they clashed in a fountain of sparks and energy….

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kylo had lost sight of Rey when his doppelgänger and she were split up- they were too dangerous as a team, but, _oh, how right, fighting alongside her had felt._

His doppelgänger gave no quarter and expected none in return, either he and Rey won and lived or they didn’t, but they would do it together. _This is a dream._

He sabre was locked down by two of the guards bearing an electro-bisento and a vibro-voulge, the long pole arms keeping him out of reach of their wielders as he was forced backwards towards a electrified vent.

Just at the last moment, with a supreme amount of effort, Kylo broke the lock and thrust them both away from him, just in time to skewer another of their brethren square in the chest before throwing him into the electrified vent, it ripped them into shreds then spewed them out like some ghastly kind of confetti. _This is a dream._

And then there were three, circling him as he revolved on the spot, trying to keep them in sight as he tried to work how his best plan of attack, sparks lit the air around them, flying out from one of the wall hangings that was now aflame.

He heard the crack as one of guards snapped apart their bilari electro-chain whip, Kylo let his instincts take over, and fully tuned into the force, letting it guide him. _This is a dream._

He met them as they charged, blade for blade, screaming red lightsaber meeting their hissing bladed weapons.

The whip wielder went down first, kicked onto their knees, then decapitated in a shower sparks. He liberated a polearm from one, using it in concert with his lightsaber to down another guard, but before he could get his lightsaber free, the third guard was on him, wielding another polearm and Kylo was pushed back, away from where his lightsaber was, and now he was unarmed.

He desperately dodged the weapon, moving backwards before managing to grasp the pole and wrestle with the guard for dominance. _This is a dream._

The guard twisted the pole, forcing Kylo to change his grip or break his wrists and as he did so, the guard brought the pole up under his guard, moving behind Kylo’s body as the hard, unyielding pole was pressed against his throat. It was only Kylo’s frantic grip on it that prevented his throat from being crushed completely...

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The guard wielding the two blades was _fast_ , Rey was barely keeping up with them, he’d already cut her upper arm, the slice burning like fire as she fought for her life. Unlike the guards, she had no armour, even Kylo had thick layers of clothing that gave him some protection. Rey barely had anything. _This is a dream._

Despite the adrenalin, Rey was flagging, and both she and her opponent knew it, she had lifted her lightsaber high to meet one of their blades when they kicked her solidly in the chest, knocking the breath from her as she hit the floor, her hands coming up just in time to stop her face breaking on the black tiles. She pushed herself back up immediately, slicing the air in front of her wildly to keep them back so she could regain her breath a little.

They clashed again, and somehow, the guard caught Rey’s elbow in their own, locking it down and trapping her lightsaber with her arm. _This is a dream._

They struggled amid the burning embers, surrounded by the carnage created in just a few minutes, turning the once imposingly grand chamber into a mess of fire and bodie parts.

The blade of the guard inched its way towards Rey’s face, as she watched it edge nearer, her mind cleared, she looked at the blank mask of the guard then at her lightsaber, it was now or never.

Rey let go of the hilt, allowing it to fall as she extricated herself, crouching down and grabbed the hilt with her other hand, slicing across the guards knees with it before standing and slicing the blade across their neck, the body fell backwards, over the edge of the platform. _This is a dream._

She turned away, to see Ben, _Kylo!_ Caught with a polearm across his throat, struggling against the last guard standing.

Rey didn’t think, she just acted, “Ben!” she yelled as she threw the hilt of her lightsaber, it sailed towards him in a graceful arc, he caught it, somehow, he caught it, igniting it straight away; and it’s beam shot straight through the guards masked head…

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kylo felt the guards grip slacken and the body fall away behind him, as he held Rey’s eyes and discarded the polearm, _that had been close._

Even battered and sweaty, she moved him like no other, made his black heart beat again.

“The fleet!” She yelled, voice urgent as she ran to the magnifier, “Order them to stop firing there’s still time to save the fleet!” _This is a dream._

Kylo turned his gaze away from her and it fell on the body of Snoke, he felt weightless, finally free of the yoke of oppression, of the heavy handed, abusive tutelage of Snoke. He was Apprentice _no more._  

The sheer magnitude of what he had done, of what he had done for _her,_ hit him as he walked closer to the dais with heavy tread.

“Ben?” Rey’s voice was quiet now, subdued, unsure. _This is a dream._

His eyes stayed on Snoke’s remains, still breathing deeply as he said, “It’s time to let old things die, Snoke...” He turned to look at her, to make sure she understood him, “Skywalker,” he walked towards her, unable not to gravitate towards the Light inside her, “The Sith, the Jedi, the Rebels. Let it all die. _Rey_ ,” He swallowed and reached out his gloved hand to her, almost in a mirror of when she had held her hand out to him, when she was back on the island. His heart was in his mouth as he uttered one of the most important sentence of his life, “ I want you to join me” he paused, willing her to understand what he was offering, understand and _accept_ , “We can rule together and bring a new order to the galaxy!” _This is a dream._

But she was shaking her head, a pained expression on her face as she said quietly, “Don’t do this Ben,” she choked on a small, weary sob, “Please don’t go this way”

Frustration surged through Kylo’s doppelgänger, “No, no, you’re still holding on! Let go!” he ended on an angry shout...

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rey was exhausted, mind and body and soul and she couldn’t respond to his words, he forged on, changing tack in that mercurial way of his.

“Do you want to know the truth about your parents? ...Or have you always known?”

_Stars_ ! Not this, _not now_ , she couldn’t, just couldn’t. _This is a dream._

He walked closer, as his cruel words sank their barbs into her soul, “Have you just hidden it away, you know the truth; say it... _say it_.”

Rey felt tears spill over and trail hot paths down her already warm cheeks, her chest ached as she finally accepted what she had always secretly known, she looked down, away from his merciless gaze, to give her the strength to utter the words she had never even said to herself, “They were nobody.”

His expression never changed, at least there was no victory there, she could not have borne that, “They were filthy junk traders, who sold you off for drinking money.”

Rey couldn’t help a sob escaping her, it shouldn’t hurt her, not after all these years, yet it did, so much. _This is a dream._

“They’re dead in a pauper's grave in the Jakku desert. You have no place in this story, you come from nothing, you’re nothing...”

She looked away again, something inside her was raw and aching, all her fears and insecurities weighed her spirit down, each word he said was added another stone to the load.

“But not to me,” her eyes flew back to his face, _what?_ Her heart stilled as he extended his hand to her again, eyes soft as he said, “Join me,” he took another step towards her, hand still outstretched, “ _Please?_ ” It was a desperate whisper, an emotional entreaty that almost swayed her, _almost._

Rey knew instinctively that this was a pivotal moment, she felt the weight of history in the making… but she _could not_ take his hand. _This is a dream._

Her heart broke as she slowly raised her hand, hope had flared in his eyes at her action, and it tore her in two, but there was no other way it could be done.

Rey summoned the hilt of Luke’s lightsaber that was clipped at Kylo’s belt, it flew towards her, but the betrayal in his eyes didn’t slow his reactions, and he immediately pulled the other way.

It became a battle, even though they barely moved, it was no less fierce than the one they had just previously fought, together. _This is a dream._

As they strove for dominance, their laboured breath sounding harsh in the empty, burning, body strewn chamber, the power of their struggle started to push them back, their boots sliding along the smooth floor, moving them away from the hilt of the lightsaber, which had begun to hum and vibrate, as the force they were exerting started to pull it apart. _This is a dream._

The force swirled around them, snapping and thrumming in the air, swirling the sparks about them… then the energy they were drawing on reached critical mass, the hilt ruptured, then broke in two and Rey and Kylo were flung apart by the awesome concussion of power, and all was darkness...

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this makes sense... I know, so much dream TLJ stuff, sorry, I know it’s lazy, but it drives the plot quite a bit hre atm and I felt like the details were needed. I may have got the fight sequence/weapons etc wrong (everything happens very fast!) if I have, please do correct me and I can edit. (Anyone know what that electrified vent actually was?) Thanks ^_^  
> The chapter title is taken from a line from Duran Duran's lyrics to Union of the Snake.  
> Some answers coming in next chapter, I promise. Real ones. It is already written!
> 
> I went out for cocktails… So part of this chapter is courtesy of Rum, Gin, Vodka, Martini, and Whiskey. Gotta love off peak happy hour! (This was purely for medicinal purposes- it made my shoulder better, honest.)
> 
> Rancor vs Rey duel is pretty much the fight between Achilles and Boagrius in the movie Troy… #noshame
> 
> So many songs, here are some of them:
> 
> Cry Of Achilles by Alter Bridge  
> Unstoppable by Sia  
> Flat On The Floor by Nickelback  
> Deceiver Of Fools by Within Temptation  
> Nightfall by Blind Guardian  
> Fury of the wild by HammerFall  
> Cuts Marked in the March of Men by Coheed and Cambria  
> Hand Of Sorrow by Within Temptation


	77. The Truth Lies In Between

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * = translation in notes at the bottom.

 

***^*v*^***

Chewie was sitting in the back of the pick up truck that Han was driving, and Luke and Leia were in the cab with him.

He was enjoying the wind in his fur, tongue lolling out of his mouth as they sped along a dusty track away from the small plane Luke had landed in a mostly-flat, empty space near their destination.

A dark-skinned man had met them with the truck and stayed behind to guard the plane till they could return. Chewie had been slightly suspicious of this man, but Han seemed to know him and Chewie thought he recognised his scent. Still, he had sent the man a warning lip curl and growl before they had driven away.

Chewie could feel the tension coming from his humans in the cab: they were worried about their pups, who had disappeared. And Han was still angry with Chewie for not alerting him to his pup taking his van and leaving to find the other special pup who had been taken.

Chewie had not understood why Han had tried to prevent Ben-pup from going after the Rey-pup, he knew the pups needed each other, could see their connection as waves of energy that surrounded them when they were together. They were special, and belonged together. Why Han and the humans could not see that confused Chewie.

It was hot in this dry place, the fire in the sky was stronger even than on the longest day back home.

By the time they reached human dwellings, Chewie was very thirsty. All the buildings were plain and ramshackle and Chewie did not like the look or scent of the people around them.

The truck stopped outside large gates and they all got out, Chewie jumping over the side of the flatbed to land with puffs of dust on the concrete. The heat of it burned his paws and he shifted his weight, then moved over to stand where there was more dust.

“You let me do the talking.” Leia said firmly as they paused in front of the gate, “He may have nothing to do with this, after all. Han, conceal your gun, we don’t want to get off on the wrong foot.”

Han made a grumbling noise, but covered his bang-stick, and they opened the gate and went inside.

The space made Chewie think of Han’s space, full of pieces of metal, the heated smell of it making Chewie’s nose twitch… But then he could smell her, the Rey-pup, though it was old and faint. He put his nose to the floor and followed it, ignoring Han’s shout for him to heel. Chewie really didn’t know why Han still bothered saying that word.

The trail led him deep into the scrap stacked around until he came to a small crawl space which he could only get his head into. There, after the space opened up a bit, was a sort of nest of rags and ripped t-shirts. This had been the Rey-pup’s kennel. But she had not been here for some time, and there was no scent of Ben-pup.

Chewie communicated this to Han when he reached him, before Han could bark at Chewie. Han’s eyebrows drew down at the news and he relayed it to Luke and Leia, the sharp scent of worry surrounding them grew.

A shot rang out in the air accompanied by angry barking and Chewie pushed through his humans to stand in front of them, lips raised in a full snarl.

Luke grabbed a hold of his collar as Leia made calming noises as a very fat human and two skinny ones came towards them, waving bang-sticks.

“Who the fuck do you think you are, coming onto my property? Who sent you? It better not be Ducain, because you won’t leave here alive.”

“You are Unkar Plutt?” Leia asked, putting a restraining hand on Han’s arm, keeping it away form his bang-stick.

The fat man looked her up and down and Chewie growled again. “So what if I am?”

“We are looking for some missing children. One of them is called Rey and used to… live under your care here. We just came to see if she had returned, we are concerned for her well-being.”

A crafty light appeared in the fat man’s eyes, “Rey, you say? Can’t say I’m surprised, she was always trying to run away. But she ain’t here, no other kids neither. Now get the fuck off my property.”

Chewie took a few steps forward, taking Luke with him, his growl gaining volume as he stared the fat human down. The fat human swallowed and clicked something on his bang-stick.

“Chewie, stay,” Han said. His voice was coloured with warning and Chewie glanced back at him, his face was serious, so Chewie sat down, but kept his gaze pinned on the fat human.

“You know something,” Luke said calmly. “You have information, you will give it to us.”

Chewie could feel that there was a force behind his words, Luke and Leia were surreptitiously touching fingers.

The fat human’s eyes went slightly vacant. “One of the Hutt’s got hold of her, dunno why...” He blinked and squinted at them in confusion.

Before he could say anymore, Leia was walking forwards, Chewie could tell her legs were weak but she did not falter, “Thank you so much for your time, Mr Plutt,” she said smoothly. “Sorry for our intrusion.”

The fat human and the skinny humans moved out of their way slightly, the fat one still frowning as he watched them go by, scratching his thinning, greasy hair. He flinched a little when he met Chewie’s eyes.

When they were almost at the gate, the fat human called after them, “When you get ahold of Rey, put her in a shock collar, only way she’ll learn. I got some in the office, I can sell you cheap?”

Leia froze where she stood, fury marking her every line, Luke put a hand on her arm but she shook it off as she turned, eyes snapping with outrage.

“I am not in the habit of putting _banned torture devices_ on anyone, let alone a child. You should be ashamed of yourself!”

The fat human reddened in the face. “Northerners!” he spat. “You’re a bunch of milk-hearted toffs, the lot of you. You have your heads so far up your own arses–”

Han shot the fat human in the hand that held his bang-stick, shot the hands of the other two men for good measure, then grabbed Leia’s arm and dragged her quickly back to the van, Luke following fast behind him, his own bang-stick now in his hand.

They piled into the truck, Han put his foot down and they were away in a cloud of dust, leaving the angry screams behind them.

Chewie was folded into the cab with them, and he ginned and licked Leia’s arm. She gave him an absent minded pat then wiped her arm on her trousers. “You really shouldn’t have done that,”

she said to Han, but there was a smile on her face.

Han shrugged, eyes flicking to his rear view mirror constantly. “I’ve read about Rey’s scars and you’ve _seen_ them, the shithead deserved it, and more.”

“Yes, well… I just hope this doesn’t cause problems for Lando. This is his truck, after all.”

Han shrugged again. “I’m sure he’ll cope, .”

They were silent for a moment, with only the sound of Chewie’s panting and the roar of the engine as Han increased his speed.

Leia put a hand to her head. “ _Light,_ that took it out of me. I wish you’d warn me before you do something like that, Luke.”

“Sorry,” Luke rubbed his eyes tiredly, “there wasn’t time… The Hutts... Their territory is in the East. That will take a while, and we don’t know which Hutt is responsible; sadly we weren’t strong enough to get anymore out of Plutt.”

Han nodded. “Lando may be able to come up with something, but it would take a while and quite a lot of credits. Can’t you, I don’t know, feel Ben or Rey? You said they were stronger than you?”

Luke gave Han a wry look. “They are, but nothing like that. We may sense them from a hundred feet away, if they are together, but just that would take quite a lot of energy from us.”

Chewie could feel their frustration and dismay, and he whined as he put his head on Leia’s knee.

She gave him a wan smile as she scratched his ears, “I never thought I’d regret not letting Ben have a mobile phone... I can’t believe he’d _do_ something like this, and take the others with him!”

Luke and Han both raised their eyebrows, as Luke said, “I can’t believe we didn’t _expect_ it. Of course he was going to go after her, and _of course_ the Knights would go too. I am slightly surprised he included Finn and Poe… and then there’s _Hux._ That is what truly baffles me, why, in the name of everything that is sensible, would Ben take _Hux_ with them?”

“I don’t like it,” Han answered Luke, eyes still on the road. “The only way I can see it happening is if they kidnapped that shithead, but I can’t see why they’d need him, and his friends said he had told them he was going and to cover for him; which implies he knew all about it.”

Leia narrowed her eyes, but not at Han’s use of what Chewie had heard her call ‘bad words’. “This makes me suspect… Well, we all know Hux is Snoke’s favourite, and the man has always seemed… _off,_ to me… But what could interest Snoke about any of this?”

Han snorted derisively, “Nothing, Leia. You’re clutching at straws.”

Leia shot him a look but didn’t reply.

Chewie remembered Snoke. He remembered him because he wasn’t really there. The vaguest hint of his scent was cold, _bad_ , the smell of an apex predator. He communicated this to Han.

Han snorted again, “How can he not be there? You’ve seen him, I’ve seen him, _we all have_.”

Chewie answered with an irritated whine growl- humans relied on their vision too much, but Han just rolled his eyes.

They reached the plane and found the dark-skinned man sitting in the shade cast by a wing, drinking from a flask and talking into a device in his hand. He got up as they rolled to a stop and Chewie leapt out of the truck and stretched his legs, investigating some burrows as the humans talked.

Suddenly, Chewie’s hackles raised as a vibration shuddered through the air, and he turned to run back to the humans. Luke and Leia both dropped to the ground before he reached them.

They were only down for a few seconds, and were already sitting up when Chewie reached them.

“What just happened?” Han asked, worry curling around him.

Luke and Leia looked at each other, then looked at the dark-skinned man, “Nothing,” Luke said carefully, “perhaps we are just not used to such heat, and on top of all this stress.”

The dark-skinned man gave them a careful look then said casually, “You should have some water. I’ll head out and get you some before you leave.”

Chewie’s humans waited until the dark man had left in the truck before speaking. “There was a blast of power – I don’t know how or what, but I felt Rey and Ben’s signatures in it.”

“Does that mean they are close by, then?” Han asked, looking around as if he expected to see them walking into view. Chewie rolled his eyes; if they had been that close, he would have smelled them.

“No.” Leia shook her head slowly, “It felt as if it came from a long way off… I think, I don’t know, something has happened that has increased their powers somehow. We need to get in the air, _now._ Lando won’t mind, he knows we have plenty of water and food in the plane.”

Han nodded, then helped Leia up on her feet, “Are we just going to head East then?”

Luke and Leia exchanged a look before Leia nodded, “Yes. The shockwave came from that direction. Perhaps as we get closer we’ll be able to hone in on it, or Lando may have some information for us that will be helpful.”

They got in the plane, with Han sitting at the front. Chewie joined him. He liked flying. It somehow felt the same as home.

***^*v*^***

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was disorientated; his very soul seemed to be buzzing with energy, as he found himself once more in the all-encompassing _Inbetween_.

_ <Rey!> _

_ <Kylo! Are you okay? What just happened?> _He felt her rush towards him, relief filled him as they collided in a ripple of energy.

_ <I’m not sure, I think the lightsaber exploded and the shockwave shoved us out of the dream… But what happened to you in our world? What caused that pain?> _

He felt a wave of guilt from her, _ <I am sorry, I thought I had shielded you from it.> _

_ <I don’t care that I felt it, I want to know what happened!> _

_ <I did something Jabba didn’t like and he used the collar. It hurt but I am probably fine-> _

She had to paused as he snarled and pulled her into him and wrapping himself around her, _ <I’ll kill him!> _

_ <You mustn’t, Kylo; it would start a war. Trust me, I’d like to too, but we can’t.> _

_ <Right she is, young Solo,> _ said a voice that was not Rey’s.

They both tore apart, tension flowing through them and between them in waves.

There was a third consciousness here, with them in the _Inbetween_. And whoever it was knew his name.

_ <Who’s there?> _ He and Rey said at the same time, voices anxious and wary.

_ <Yoda, I am called, younglings.> _

Whoever it was had an odd turn of phrase. The voice in Kylo’s mind sounded elderly but somehow mischievous at the same time.

_ <What do you want?> _ Rey asked suspiciously.

_ <And how do you know my name?> _ Kylo added.

_ <What I want it is not, what I can tell you, it is. Yesss. Know your name I do, as your family I know. But, not much time have we. Listen you must… * Many layers there are to reality. And closest to the reality I was born in, the layer of your world is. The place, just been, you have. Mirror-like, they are. Your realities overlapping I felt; giving you access to power that belongs here not. Rey, I who brought you to Canto Bight, it was. So meet young Solo, you would. If met later on in life, you had, the outcome, very different would have been. The end of your world as you know it, the result may have been, and had an adverse effect of the layer I originally came from, it may have. Hmm.> _

If Kylo had had a face in the _Inbetween_ , he would have been crossing his eyes as he tried to make sense of the strange speech. _ <Wait, you’re saying that that place we were in is real?> _

_ <Real, it is, yesss. Exist it may, long ago, or in the future. Fluid, is time.> _

_ <Wait, if you’re from there, how did you get me to Canto Bight?> Rey asked. _

_ <Dead, I am. One with the Force. Able, am I, to move through the layers. Takes much effort, it does, but influence small things, I can.> _

There was a pause as Kylo and Rey absorbed this, tried to come to terms with it.

_ <Why should we believe you?> _ Rey was clearly still skeptical and Kylo couldn’t blame her.

_ <Believe me, do not. Your feelings, you must search; and revealed, the truth will be. To the horizon, look not, but to the spark inside.'.> _

Everything this Yoda had said struck a chord deep in Kylo- the dream was true, _it was all true_ … Did that mean that his and Rey’s doppelgängers were dead? Killed in the explosion caused by the breaking of the lightsaber? Instinct told him they had survived…

Kylo felt a tug, then another. _ <I think I am waking up!> _

_ < Beware the call of darkness, both of you must, in the time to come... Trust yourselves and each other, you must... May the Force be with you both, younglings, herh herh herh…> _

The strange presence faded with an odd impish sound that Kylo thought was probably laughter. He felt another tug, this one insistent. _ <Rey, I’m about to go. But I will see you soon. Don’t do anything else to upset Jabba, we are almost there, _ **_be ready_ ** _… > _

Kylo woke up before he could hear her answer.

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
"Our lives are not our own. From womb to tomb, we are bound to others, past and present, and by each crime and every kindness, we birth our future."

—Sonmi-451, in Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

*Yoda’s speech, un-Yoda-ed. (Cos let’s face it, it’s not easy to follow)

There are many layers to reality. And the layer of your world is the closest to the reality I was born in. The place you have just been. They are mirror-like. I felt your realities overlapping, giving you access to power that doesn't belong here. Rey, it was I who brought you to Canto Bight. So you would meet young Solo.  If you had met later on in life, the outcome would have been very different, the result may have been the end of your world as you know it, and it may have had an adverse effect on the layer I originally came from.

Do not believe me, search your feelings, and the truth will be revealed. Look not to the horizon, but to the spark inside.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chewie’s POV written for Akashne, who said a while ago that she wished the Original Team (TM) were involved somehow… ^_^ (#HanShotFirst)
> 
> I hope this all makes sense, sometimes stuff in my head does and then I write it and it comes out unintelligible. I’m currently riddled with doubt and feeling really paranoid and second guessing everything; so I’d be really grateful to hear your thoughts, all feedback very welcome.
> 
> Chapter title taken from a lyrics of The Truth Beneath The Rose by Within Temptation
> 
> Edit: Okay, so I had to rewrite this as I realised it was giving you too much information at once, and one of the reveals could ruin one of the plot arcs. So sorry, not as much as I’d promised. Next update Tuesday or Wednesday X
> 
> Betaed by [forbloodysummer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/forbloodysummer/pseuds/forbloodysummer)


	78. The Cost Of Defiance

 

Rey came awake abruptly; at first she felt slightly disoriented, unsure which reality this was, but the familiar pressure of the shock collar around her neck made it clear where she was.

To her surprise, her body felt remarkably okay - she had expected every muscle to be aching from Jabba’s protracted use of the shock collar, yet she felt fine; in fact, she felt  _ good _ .

And she could feel power, the  _ Force _ , their mirror-selves called it. So did she and Kylo now have it independently? 

_ <Kylo?> _

_ <Rey! The others woke me up because we had reached Molavar, we should be in Tatooine in about four hours or so. Are you okay?> _

_ <Yeah. I only just woke up, need to try and work out where I am… Can you feel the Force? I can feel it on my own!> _

There was a pause and a wave of surprise and excitement flooded through the bond,  _ <Yes! I can feel it too! Shit, this is a game changer! Getting you out will be much easier with our powers!> _

Rey frowned,  _ <Don’t get too excited, remember what Luke said, we can’t be too obvious about how we use it. But, this may mean you don’t have to come in at all, I can probably get out on my own. I’d just need you to wait nearby for a quick getaway and provide support if I end up needing it.> _

_ <Are you sure?> _ Kylo almost sounded disappointed.

_ <Yes. At least, at the moment I am. Things may change, so be ready for anything I guess. I’ll wait till it grows dark as I’ll probably go out via the roof at first.> _

_ <Okay, we are going to be in Tatooine before dusk… We have plenty of weapons and stuff with us, should we need them.> _

_ <Find somewhere out of the way to hide till it gets dark, if you are tooled up, you’ll be noticed and may get summoned to see Jabba. You can’t walk into someone else’s territory looking like you are prepared for a fight… I don’t suppose you have any clothing that will fit me? I’m in standard slave wear, and I want out of it as soon as possible.> _

_ <I don’t think we do, but I will try and sort something out.> _

_ <Thanks. Okay, I need to try and work out where I am and think about how I’m going to get out, but I’ll keep our connection open.> _

_ <Okay, I’ll update you as we go.> _

 

Rey opened her eyes,  _ really, she needed to stop doing that,  _ and took in her surroundings. She was on the floor, in a small, boxy room with a very small, deep set window. There was a bench with a blanket on it, and a suspicious looking bucket in one corner - if they thought she was going to relieve herself in that, they were sorely mistaken.

It was hot, even with the deep walls and the clothing she had been given after her shower were dirty and sweat soaked. 

Rey stood and stretched, grimacing over how she smelled, then went and investigated the door. It was solid wood with a small hole set in it just above her eye level, she tried the handle and found it locked, though that didn’t come as a surprise.

She pushed her senses out and felt some presences not far off, she was able to glean that they were slaves rather than guards, but nothing else. She would have to work on how to use the Force, but first, she needed to get someone's attention, she was dehydrated and there was no water in the room with her.

When the time came, she may be able to manipulate the lock with the Force, or just do that mind trick thing her mirror-self had used when she had been interrogated, but until Rey had a definite getaway, she’d have to be patient. 

So, like any other ordinary prisoner, she yelled and banged on the door.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The Operation Peanut team left Molavar after getting fuel. It was hot,  _ insanely hot  _ and the terrain gave no relief from the relentless sun. 

The road they had taken was a quieter one, they had decided to avoid the main route to Tatooine as they wanted to get changed with as few witnesses as possible.

They were driving through a desert wasteland and Kylo was glad that the falcon had off roading capabilities as the road they were following was often covered in sand or small rocks.

The atmosphere in the van was filled with tension that only grew as they got nearer to their final destination. Everyone was on edge, a mixture of nerves, excitement, fear and determination. 

They should have been sleeping or at least resting, but it proved impossible, even Poe had only got a few hours, despite having driven all night. He seemed fine though, he’d had some coffee in Molavar and was as restless as the rest of them.

Kylo hadn’t told anyone that he and Rey could now access their abilities individually, or of their encounter with the consciousness named Yoda. 

But he did relay his conversation with Rey, which had been why they’d chosen a lesser road to Tatooine.

When they’d looked for suitable clothing for Rey, all they had found were dresses, it seemed women here were looked on rather differently than in the North. So they’d got her some boys clothing, it had been difficult to work out what would fit her, but they could always pick something else up on the trip home.

The clothing was black, to match theirs, and they’d picked up another Jawa cowl and veil too.

When they were still a few miles out from Tatooine, they stopped by the side of the road and changed, making sure their skin was covered in black. Poe applied the eyeliner for everyone as no one else had any idea what to do with it, and Finn helped with adjusting the cowls and veils.

They opted to leave off the body armour till just before they needed it, but they strapped on and concealed any weapons they may need.

Finn inspected everyone when they were done and gave a satisfied nod, “We look pretty much like Jawas… I was thinking, if we are waiting till dark, it may be good to get another number plate for when we are clean away, just in case Rey is seen getting in the van.”

Kylo nodded, “Makes sense. Let’s get back in and get going. I don’t want to stand under this bloody sun any longer than necessary.”

As they settled down in the van and got going, a flash of fury and frustration swept through the bond.  

_ <Rey? Are you all right?> _ Kylo asked anxiously.

_ <They put me in a fucking dress!> _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Someone had come relatively quickly once Rey started making a noise. Rey had raised herself on her toes so she could see through the small hole in the door and was met by the wide eyes of a boy in slave attire.

“Can I have some water? I’m dying in here,” she asked in a reasonable voice.

“I will have to ask someone.” He said, his voice squeaky and clearly close to breaking, and he hurried away.

Rey paced the room as she waited, the feeling of the Force around her and within reach was frustrating as it wasn’t yet time to use it, but it was also welcome. It felt right somehow, as if she’d been missing it her whole life but hadn’t known till now.

It was Oola who opened her door, but she had a flinty eyed guard with her, gun in hand. Oola gave Rey a small smile, then gestured along the corridor, “You need another shower, and you can change clothes. Then I’ll see about getting you some food and water. Come with me.”

Rey eyed the guard right back, then nodded and followed Oola, a lukewarm shower sounded perfect right now. The guard followed behind them as they walked and Rey realised they were in the same corridor that led to the bathroom.

When they entered though, the guard followed too. Rey’s eyebrows hit her hairline. “I am not showering in front of him,” she stated flatly. 

The guard smirked at her, widening his stance as Oola gave Rey a small shake of her head, “Sorry, Jabba’s orders, just keep your back to him.”

Rey muted the bond then shook her head, “No. Either he goes outside or I am not showering.”

Oola sighed slightly and waved the collar control at Rey, “I’ve told you before I don’t like using these, but I have orders and I will use it if you don’t do as you are told.”

Rey studied the guard, considering, she could mind trick him, but Oola would see, Rey had no idea if you could mind trick more than one person, and didn’t want to try now in case it didn’t work.  _ Shit. _

“If you do not start soon, I will help.” The guards accent was heavy but understandable.

Rey growled, then turned away from them and walked quickly into the shower area,  _ if he laid one finger on her she would kill him. _ With that comforting thought, she pulled off her dirty clothing quickly and threw everything over her shoulder.

The water felt good but she couldn’t enjoy the feeling properly and washed as quickly as was humanly possible, carefully keeping aware of where Oola and the guard were in the room.

Thankfully the guard stayed where he was, and when Rey was done, Oola kindly brought a towel to Rey, which Rey swiftly wrapped around herself as securely as she could.

They proceeded to the room with all the clothing again, and the guard joined them there too, every time he met her eyes, he smirked, so Rey decided to ignore him as much as possible.

But this time, when Oola handed her a pile of clothes, they were not the same as Rey’s previous ones.

“I am not wearing that!” She almost yelled when she held up what could loosely be called a dress. “Why can’t I wear the same things as before?”

Oola shrugged, “Jabba insisted.”

Rey shook her head, escaping in that  _ thing _ would be so much harder. “I am not wearing it.”

The guard answered her, shrugging as he grinned, “It’s that or go naked, you’re skinny but I doubt anyone would complain.”

Rey very almost lost her temper, she could feel the static of it ripple along her skin, making the hairs stand up. She reined it in. _Patience._ _She needed to be patient._

She looked at the dress again. “I don't even know how you put something like that on!”

Oola gave her a small smile, “Get the underwear on, then I’ll help you.” 

Rey let out a deep, angry breath, then turned her back to Oola and the guard and pulled on the scanty underwear she’d been given, then allowed Oola to help her with the dress.

It turned out to be the same as Oola’s, made of softly draping off white material, the neck dipped low, exposing Rey’s chest which was only covered in bra that was more like a bikini top. The slits at the legs came right up to her hips and Oola added a wide embellished belt around Rey’s middle, cinching it in.

As Oola stood back to look at her Rey glared and crossed her arms over her chest, “This is not a dress, it is a glorified scrap of material.”

Oola raised her eyebrows ands gestured to herself, “Most of the women here wear them, it may feel odd but no one will look at you twice. Now sit. I need to do your hair.”

“Oh, I don't know. I think plenty of people are going to want to check out Rancor’s killer,” the guard drawled as Rey sat, “If I hadn’t seen it, I wouldn’t have believed it, especially now” he smirked at Rey.

“If you don’t shut up I will kill you too, you goat kissing cretin.” As soon as Rey said it she regretted it,  _ really, where had all her patience gone? _

The guard merely laughed though, “I don’t doubt you would, if you were given the chance.  _ But you won’t be _ . The safety is off this” he waved the gun slightly, “and I’ve been ordered to shoot you in the leg if you try anything.”

Rey stayed silent, glaring at him as Oola tugged and pulled her hair into what felt like a high braid.

Once she was done, Oola took her downstairs, then down another flight to a room that was clearly a dining room for the slaves.

As they’d walked Rey had carefully kept an eye out for windows big enough for her to climb out of, if she tied the dress up at the sides, it may be possible for her to climb. It was a shame that the dress was such a light colour though, but hopefully any guards would be looking outwards, rather than at their own building. The street lights in Jakku had always been sparse and weak compared to those in the north and Rey hoped it was the same here.

Rey greedily drank two cups of water before starting on the food she was given, the meal was basic, bread and a dish of cold beans with vegetables, but it filled the hole in Rey’s grumbling stomach. As she ate, Rey unmuted the bond, in case Kylo had been worried.

_ <Rey? Are you all right?> _   
_ <They put me in a fucking dress!> _ She shot back, as she concentrated on eating normally.

_ <Oh, well that complicates things... are you still going to be able to climb?> _

_ <I’m not sure yet, but will let you know when I have been able to test it. I forgot to tell you- I don’t have any shoes, it’s probably too late for you to get some, but it may slow me down, depending on what way I take.> _

_ <Okay, don’t worry, we will figure this out. We can always go with a different plan if necessary… are you otherwise okay?> _

_ <Yeah. Just pissed off. How are you doing? Is everything okay your end?> _

_ <Yeah. We’re about an hour out of Tatooine, we’re pretty much ready to go at a moments notice so if you get an opening earlier on, we will be ready.> _

_ <Okay. Just so you know, the guards here are armed with handguns, assault rifles and knives. Please don’t take any big risks, these guys know their guns better than the back of their hands and they won’t think twice about shooting a Jawa, or anyone else they perceive as a threat. I’m not worth any of you dying for and I should be able to do most of this on my own.> _

Kylo’s voice was firm as he answered,  _ <Whatever happens, I am not leaving you there a moment longer than necessary. And don’t forget you and I can heal wounds.> _

_ Rey frowned, <We can, but don’t get cocky, we cannot heal death… probably not lost limbs either.> _

_ <I know. Everyone on Operation Peanut says hi by the way.> _

Rey laughed then had to cover that with a cough, the guard and Oola looked at her suspiciously as Rey took a sip of water, trying to look as innocent as possible.

_ <Don’t make me laugh, I am with people!> _

_ <Oops, sorry, you okay?> _

_ <Yeah, got to concentrate for a bit, talk to you later..> _

_ <Okay, be careful.> _

_ <Of course.> _

Rey felt his disbelief, _ <You jump off buildings and climb into fires. That is not careful> _

Rey almost snorted but remembered where she was, _ <And yet, I am fine. Talk to you later.> _

Rey scraped the last of the food out of the bowl and finished her water, then looked expectantly at Oola, who stood up.

“I’ll take you back to your room now,” she told Rey as they went back up the stairs, they were stopped before they could go up the second flight of stairs however, by the Fett twins.

“Jabba wants to see her,” one of them said as they looked her over carefully, the one who didn’t speak frowned then took Rey’s arm in his large hot hands and examined it.

Rey didn’t understand what he was looking for until he pulled her nearer him and showed her arm to the other twin, “The cut on her arm is healed over and scarred.”

_ Oh shit, when had that happened? _ They both looked at her intently, “What did you do?”

Rey thought fast, and gestured to Oola, “I heal quickly, and Oola put bacta on it when I first got here.”

“You heal quickly?” One of them said, in a voice that sounded entirely too calculating.

Rey went to shrug, but remembered her loose dress and the twin still had her arm away way, so she just nodded unhappily.

“Break it up you two, Jabba told you no already.” Rey was surprised by the guard intervening. 

The twins gave him cold, flat looks, “We can take her from here, Krella.”

The guard, Krella shook his head, “No, my orders are clear, when she is out of her room, I stay with her.” He turned to look at Oola, “You can go, though, pretty thing. I’ll see  _ you _ later,” he held out his free hand and Oola put the collar remote in it, gave Rey a slight nod, then walked away.

Krella looked at the twins, “By all means, lead the way.”

Rey was jerked along with them, her arm still in one of the twins grasp, his thumb kept stroking the scar where she had been cut, the feeling made her feel slight nauseas, she tried yanking her arm free but his grip just tightened.

_ <Rey? What’s going on?> _ Kylo must have sensed her unease

_ <Nothing bad, don’t worry, it’s just a bit weird. I’m fine, but I need to concentrate, so I’m going to mute the bond for a bit.> _

His voice came through frustrated,  _ <I don’t like it when you do that.> _

_ <I know, but I can’t have any distractions, I am sorry. I’ll be fine. I love you and I’ll see you soon.> _

Rey muted the bond before he could reply, very aware of the twins proximity, she considered seeing if she could flick one with the Force, the way she had Hux last Friday… But it probably would be a bad idea, she sighed slightly in resignation.

At least no one was insisting she keep her eyes down, she studied everything as they walked, the marble floor pleasantly cool under her bare feet. Everything was tacky yet opulent, and useless, there was no way she would be getting out on the ground floor, there were men with guns or knives everywhere.

They entered the same room she had met Jabba in before, a different woman was dancing on the podium, Jabba was in the same chair with another who was settled at Jabba’s feet as he idly petted her hair.

Rey dropped her eyes before he could look up, remembering Oola’s advice from that morning.

Jabba chuckled as they approached, “That is much more suitable attire. Turn around.”

Rey gritted her teeth and did as she was asked, embracing the cold place to help her stay calm and collected.

“Yes,  _ much better, _ come and sit on the floor by me. Idji, you can go about your duties.” The woman on the floor rose swiftly and made a quick exit, Rey didn’t move until one of the twins pushed her forwards. She went grudgingly, then sat down with her back to Jabba as she tried to arrange dress as modestly as possible. 

“Turn and look at me,” Rey did as she was bid, “Yes, there it is,” Jabba leaned forward and gripped her chin with his fat fingers, “That  _ defiance... _ You killed my favourite fighter, so I have doubled your price, if the buyer changes his mind, I keep you. I’m rather hoping he does change it, you can take on Rancor’s role during the day and be a pleasure slave at night.”

Rey sank deeper into the cold, it was either than or throw up on Jabba’s feet. “Now, sit there nice and quietly, while I work,” he told her.

Rey turned her back to him and he idly started stroking her bare neck, she suppressed the urge to shudder.

Krella joined the other guards around the room, occasionally throwing a smirk Rey’s way, she ignored him as she listened to Jabba give the Fett’s an assignment. 

Before they left, one of them gestured at her, “She heals quickly, so if you keep her…?”

Jabba laughed, “I will ensure you are first in line,” he told them, sounding like an indulgent father. The twin’s expressions didn’t alter much, they merely nodded and left.

Hopefully that was the last time Rey would ever see of them, Jabba was sending them to Bespin and they were leaving now, so they’d be one less thing to worry about while she escaped.

The time past very slowly, Jabba was constantly touching her hair, neck or shoulders and Rey was unable to relax her muscles under his revolting caresses.

After a while she unmuted the bond, in case Kylo was concerned and so she could check where he was.

Kylo was immediately there, worry colouring his voice in her head,  _ <Are you all right? Did something happen?> _

_ <I’m fine, but I am currently with Jabba, so I have to be careful.> _ Rey kept her face blank as she stared at the floor in front of her, at least the rug she was sitting on was thick. The marble would have been very uncomfortable.

_ <Why are you with him? What is he doing?> _

_ <He is working, I’m just here because I made him angry earlier and he is trying to cow me now.> _

_ <Rey… what did you do?> _

Rey swallowed and shifted nervously, she really didn’t want Kylo to know what she had done, he’d seen her kill the red guards in their dream, but this was very different.

“Something wrong pet?” Jabba asked as his fingers stilled on her hair, Rey froze, then shook her head slightly. “Then remain still,” he instructed her and went back to petting her.

_ <Rey?> _

_ <I’m fine. But I probably shouldn’t talk at the moment unless I have to.> _

_ <Okay, well, we are about to arrived in Tatooine. I’ll keep you updated, see you soon.> _

_ <You too.> _

Rey slipped into a meditative state, without entering the cold place completely, so Kylo could still talk to her when necessary... 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

They arrived in Tatooine in the early evening, Poe was driving with Hux directing him. They found an out of the way spot to park up left the van with Finn and Poe. The the Knights and Hux went off to reconnoitre Jabba’s palace and see what they were dealing with. Before they left the van everyone got an ear comm so they could easily keep in touch. 

When they were almost at the palace, they split into two teams, Hux went with Ingalan and Javiell and Leonmar and Zainmar went with Kylo.

Kylo had been careful not to distract Rey since they last spoke, but it was difficult not to be distracted the closer he got to her. The bond seemed to swell the nearer she was and he could feel the energy, the  _ Force, _ buzz around him.

He shook himself mentally and focused as they casually walked along the sides of the roads, (for some reason they didn’t bother with pavements here), surreptitiously studying the compound Rey was in.

It was surrounded by a high wall, inside it appeared as if there were a few smaller buildings and one main one. 

The main gates were closed, with armed guards stationed on the outside, casually holding assault rifles as they smoked or chatted. That was some good news, the guards were armed but they were obviously relaxed. 

They discovered that the main gate was the only way in or out, and though Hux insisted Jabba would have a back exit somewhere, they couldn’t find it.

So Rey either had to go out the gate, or over the wall, out of the gate was unlikely so they studied the wall, trying to work out if there was a part of it that had less traffic.

They met up again around the back of the compound and bought coffee from a small shop, pausing to sit and talk quietly through their comms.

“The east side will be best, it’s quieter and there is a short cut to the main road out of town,” Ingalan said and they nodded.

“Any idea if Rey will be able to get out or if we need to go in?” Zainmar asked, “Those guards looked relaxed but their guns looked well used.”

“She isn’t sure yet, she is still with Jabba and hasn’t been able to test it.” Kylo answered, he was increasingly uneasy about the emotions coming through the bond, repulsion and disgust were coming off Rey in waves.

“A distraction would probably be a good idea,” Hux said, his pale eyes stood out sharply surrounded in the black eyeliner, they somehow looked colder than normal, “The A.S.W. would get their attention, if we hit somewhere on the west side.”

Javiell laughed quietly, “Yeah, that would do it. We will need to find a good place to use it though.”

“It is effective up to five metres from it’s target, so I wouldn’t have to get close and the recoil is small so it can be used in an enclosed space,” Hux said.

“Perhaps we could hire a room with a good view?” Leonmar said, but Kylo shook his head.

“If we do that, we’ll have to get the A.S.W past whomever we pay for the room. It’s not exactly something we can hide in a bag and it’s case obviously looks like a weapons case.”

“A roof then, Hux can you climb?” Javiell asked.

“It depends on what I am climbing.” Hux answered, his cowl lifted slightly as he shrugged.

“Okay, same teams, Hux, Jav and Ingalan go and scout a good location to use the A.S.W, and we will see if we can find a number plate for later. Meet back at the van, keep in touch through the comms.” Kylo said as he finished his coffee and stood. The others followed suit and they split up again.

“I think when we get Rey we should probably bundle her into the back of the van and keep her out of sight of the windows till we are out of Tatooine, we don’t want her seen till she is able to change out of whatever they put her in,” Zainmar said as they walked.

Kylo nodded, “And we can cover her up as well, but if we get stopped, if  _ anyone  _ tries to inspect the van, we shoot them and run.” Kylo felt strange saying that,  _ would he really shoot someone?  _ He shook his head, if they were pointing a gun at him or threatening one of the others he would have to, no,  _ he would. _

“Do we shoot to kill or just to wound?” Leonmar asked quietly.

“To kill,” Hux’s voice came over their comms, “If you just wound they can still shoot you or give our descriptions to Jabba. No loose ends, if we can help it.”

The silent static after his statement went on for some time, as they all realised that this was  _ real,  _ this was  _ happening _ , and this was  _ dangerous. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Literally just finished this, so it will probably be rife with mistakes- sorry! I seem to be having a run of bad luck at the moment, I got hit on the head yesterday and got concussion so didn’t feel up to writing yesterday. I’m not mad about the chapter title, but didn’t want to delay posting this any more, as I know I’d promised you guys ♥
> 
> Here is a Pinterest board for Rey's dress, the boys weapons and the cowl and veil look: [Stuff](https://www.pinterest.co.uk/AmberDDread/after-chapter-78/)  
> Songs:
> 
> Bleeding Sun by Aviators  
> Assassin's Creed by OMNIMAR  
> This Means War by AC/DC  
> This Is Not A Game by Skunk Anansie
> 
> Oh and I wrote a random Reylo two chapter oneshot (is that a thing?) because I couldn’t sleep on Monday… that may have contributed to why I didn’t stop the poles that fell on my head… [I Want To Know Your Name](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14911026/chapters/34538319)


	79. Bu Echuta Whoma Baa Bu Nankica

A sharp tug on Rey’s braid brought her out of her reverie, “Krella, take this one back to her room.” The words had barely left Jabba’s lips before Rey shot to her feet and trotted to the door to join Krella.

“So eager little killer?” Jabba laughed, “I will be seeing you tomorrow.”

Rey grimaced and followed Krella out, not looking back at Jabba. _It’s fine, tomorrow I will be a long way away from you, you slimy, shadow souled, bastard._

Rey wasn’t sure how long she’d sat with Jabba, but her back was stiff and it was dark outside. There were still plenty of armed men around and she carefully counted them in an attempt to work out roughly how many were in the compound. By the time Krella gestured her up the stairs to the slave quarters, she had counted seventeen. She’d need to more intel from the boys about how many were outside.

As she and Krella reached the top, she asked as nicely as she could, “Please could I use the bathroom before you lock me in the room?” She refused to refer to it as hers, she wasn’t staying.

Krella looked her over, then nodded, “Okay, but I go in with you and I will shoot you if you try anything, don’t forget the safety is off.”

Rey sighed but nodded, at least the loo’s had shower curtains across them, that was better than nothing.

Once she was done and he gestured her into the same small room as before, she asked, “Can I get some water to drink, or is that it for tonight?”

Krella shrugged, then looked her up and down smirking, “I’ll bring you some water later, but it’ll cost you.”

Rey felt all her muscles tense and she backed away a few steps into the room, “I’ll pay up when you bring the water, not before.”

Krella’s smirk widened, “I’ll see you later then, little killer.” He shut the door and she heard him locking it before walking away whistling.

_ <Kylo? I’m on my own again, I counted seventeen armed men downstairs, the part of the compound I am in tends to be just slaves though.> _

_ <Glad you’re away from Jabba, are you okay?> _

_ <I’m fine. Are you able to get high up and count how many guards are in the compound and where?> _

_ <Yeah, and we did some reconn, you’re best bet is to come over the East wall, we’re going to use the A.S.W to create a diversion, aiming for the West side of the compound. I’ll let you know when we’re in position and you tell us when to fire.> _

_ <Shit, Kylo, okay, that could work. I’m going to see what I can do with the dress now and I’ll get back to you, talk soon.> _

_ <Okay, till later, I love you.> _

_ <Love you too.> _

His mind receded and Rey sighed, then set about trying to modify her dress.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

They all met back at the van, brought Finn and Poe up to date, then discussed and firmed up their plans as much as they could as they waited for Rey to confirm if she would be able to climb.

“The perimeter wall looks like it will be a fairly easy climb, at least for Rey it will. But we have a problem with the razor wire at the top of it.” Ingalan said as they sat in the dark, taking the chance to have a quick snack.

“I think I saw wire cutters in the back of the van or in Rey’s took kit. If we drive the van right up to the side of the wall someone can get on the roof and cut the wire when Rey is a minute or two away,” Kylo said.

“For this to work, some of us are going to have to split up,” Finn said and they were quiet for a moment.

Kylo nodded heavily, “Yeah. Hux, you and Ingalan are on A.S.W duty, you can have the binoculars and tell us where everyone is, Finn, you take Poe’s assault rifle and get somewhere high somewhere away from Hux and Ingalan, we need to confuse them as much as possible. Poe, you’re our getaway driver, the rest of us stay with the van, once Rey is over the wall, we’ll throw over some of the frag grenades and floor it. Once the A.S.W has been used, you both need to get out of there as quickly as possible, Finn, when you see the grenades go off you run as fast as you fucking can and we will pick you all up on our way out. Sound good?”

Hux shook his head, “I can do all that on my own, why doesn’t Ingalan go with Finn and take the other assault rifle and the binoculars? I have a decent sight on the A.S.W, and they can do more damage that way and keep you updated about movements after I disappear and before the grenades go off.”

Everyone turned to study Hux suspiciously, and his lips twisted sardonically, “It’s a bit late for me to double cross you don’t you think? And you’re my ride out of this cesspit.”

Kylo frowned, then opened himself up to the Force and brushed Hux’s mind, trying to get a hint of his intentions, Hux was excited, nervous, angry… Kylo was unable to detect any thoughts that would make him believe Hux would sell them out or let them down, but, Kylo was new at using his powers and this was _Hux…_

“How about we take your wallet and phone for safe keeping, and you get them back when we pick you up,” Javiell said, and Kylo nodded.

Hux narrowed his eyes to angry slits, “ _Fine_ ,” he almost snarled, and dug them out of his pockets to thrust them at Javiell, who grinned and stashed them in the glove compartment of the van.

“Okay then,” Kylo said, “Let’s have a look at the Sat box and work out the best place to pick you up, then we’ll get the body armour on and get going.”

As the others looked at the maps, Rey hailed him and Kylo focused on her, _ <Kylo?> _

_ <Yeah?> _

_ <I’m going to be able to climb, just,> _

Kylo could almost feel her blush, what the hell kind of dress was she wearing? _ <Well that’s good isn’t it?> _

_ <I guess… Someone is coming to my room later, I’m going to try and mind trick him into removing the collar and I’ll take his weapons, then I’ll get out on the roof, did you do a count?> _

_ <Are you sure you will be able to do that?> _

Her indignation crackled through the bond, then dulled to determination, _ <No. But my mirror-self did it and I need to try, it would be the easiest way of doing this.> _

_ <Okay… It was hard to count as they moved in and out of the buildings a lot, but there are generally five on the gate, two on the main doors, and eight patrolling the perimeter, those will be the ones that are the problem, but hopefully our distraction will take their attention away from where you are going.> _

_ <All right then… Kylo... are you prepared?> _ she sounded hesitant, awkward.

Kylo frowned, _ <Of course, I told you our plans, we’re almost ready.> _

_ <I’m not talking about your plans, Kylo… You are about to cross a line, and once over it, you can never go back… Kylo, I made Jabba angry earlier because I killed someone…> _

Kylo reeled inside, stomach clenching as Rey carried on, _ <Killing someone changes you, you won’t know how until you’ve done it. And you can’t undo it, you are about to walk into a situation where you may have to kill, or watch someone die. You need to prepare yourself, because if you aren’t ready for the shock of the first time, you’re hesitation could get you killed.> _

Kylo swallowed, his ears were ringing slightly, _ <Rey, why did you kill someone?> _

He felt her dip in to the cold place a little, as if preparing herself for a blow, as if she were afraid of his reaction.

_ <Jabba put me in the arena with one of his prize fighters, it was just to the first blood, but he was huge and didn’t wear a collar. So I killed him.> _

Kylo fumbled with the door and got out of the van, power was humming over his skin as fury coiled within him, the beast was barely contained and he knew it must be, knew he had to stay focused or he’d fuck everything up, but he couldn’t breathe, could barely think.

_ <I’ll understand if you don’t want to be with me after this.> _ Rey’s voice in his head was small and cold, as if her heart had shrunk down to protect itself from his rejection.

“Breathe, Kylo, breathe, brother.” Ingalan had his hand on Kylo’s shoulder, the other Knights joining them, “We are going to get her out, but you _need to stay with us,_ to do that.”

Kylo shook his head, but it wasn’t at them, _ <Rey…> _ Stars, what did he even say to that? When would she understand that he didn’t give a flying fuck about what she had to do to survive, all he cared about was her. _ <Rey, I love you.> _ it was the best he could do as he wrestled with himself.

_It was enough._

A tiny trickle of relief filtered through to him, as if she were still keeping a hard rein on her emotions, _ <I love you too… but remember what I said, think about it now, or if it does happen, it may take you by surprise.> _

_ <Okay> _ he managed, then looked up at the Knights, “It’s okay. I’ve got a handle on it.”

“What happened?” Ingalan asked, it was just Kylo and the Knights, the other three were hanging back, giving them space.

Kylo lowered his voice, “I found out why she made Jabba angry, it wasn’t what I was expecting.” He wasn’t sure if he should tell them the rest… but they were _here_ weren’t they? “Jabba made Rey fight someone, and she killed him.”

“Fuck.” Javiell said and the others nodded, wide eyed.

“Is this Jabba dude crazy?” Leonmar asked incredulously.

“Why did she tell you this now?” Ingalan asked.

“She wanted to make sure I was mentally prepared for if we have to do the same.”

“Is Rey okay?” They all turned to see Finn had approached them, face full or concern.

“Yeah, she’s fine,” Kylo sighed, he could tell the Knights, but would leave it up to Rey to tell Finn if she wanted to. Poe and Hux joined them as Kylo changed the direction of the conversation slightly, “Rey is going to be able to climb. It looks like she will get an opportunity to get the collar off and get out soonish, so we should get into position. Is everyone ready?” They all nodded, “Okay then, let’s do this.”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey rubbed the skin on her arms, she had felt the power surge inside Kylo when she’d admitted what she had done, and hers had risen in response.

She dearly wished she was able to exist in the cold void and still be able to speak to him, she was able to go in a little but it wasn’t much. It would have to do.

_Kylo still loved her._ Rey shook her head, unable to get over the idea of being loved unconditionally. But that was a concept she would have to examine another time, right now she needed to centre herself and focus; because if she cocked things up her end, it may well get them all killed. _Light,_ some of them may die anyway. But there wasn’t anything she could do about it.

She’d played around with her dress and found a way to tie it up and wrap it around her which meant she’d be able to climb, but had left it down in case it made Krella suspicious when he returned.

Rey thought back to the interrogation of her mirror-self, breathing deeply and calming her racing heart as she felt the Force flow around her.

It was sometime later before she felt Krella approach, his mind greasy with excitement. Rey stepped away from the door and put her back against the wall as the lock unclicked and he entered, carrying a cup of water.

Krella smirked at her as he shut the door behind him, his gun was now holstered and he put the cup on the floor by the door before turning to her, “So, pretty killer, it’s time to take off that dress.”

Rey breathed out, layering her will into her words, “You will stand still and give me the collar remote control.”

Krella just laughed at her, “And why would you think I would do that? Now take off the dress, or I’ll do it myself,” he moved towards her and Rey’s anger and fear spiked.

Without thinking she lashed out, the Force responded this time and it flung Krella against the wall, holding him still as he gasped under the pressure on his chest.

Rey hadn’t meant to do that, but she shrugged to herself, if it worked, it worked. She approached him and tried again, this time pushing the words at him as commands.

“You will stay still and hand me the collar remote control.”

Krella’s eyes went vacant and he stopped struggling as he gasped out, “I will remain still and hand you the collar remote control.”

Rey released her hold on his body and he did as she said, the victory she felt as the remote touched her hand was immense, but she pushed it down, _this was not the time._

As she released the collar and took it off, she felt her spine straighten and her shoulders square, her blood sang inside her veins, full of adrenaline and power.

She allowed herself a small smile and placed the collar around Krella’s neck, the soft snick of it closing was deeply satisfying. “You will give me your long knife and handgun.”

“I will give you my long knife and handgun.” And he did.

Rey went about tying up her dress, she used the knife to slit it up the middle and back so she could tie it more securely around herself, then tucked the gun into one of the folds, but kept the knife in her hand. She considered killing Krella, Jabba would likely do it anyway when he found the guard like this… But somehow, that felt _wrong,_ and she remembered the being Yoda’s warning to she and Kylo before he’d disappeared. _No, she only killed when necessary._

“You will stay here till morning. You will not call out, you will not move. You will forget everything that just happened.”

Krella repeated it back to her perfectly and Rey nodded. It was time for her to go. She pushed her senses out, making sure no one else was near, then made her exit, carefully locking the door behind her.

_ <Kylo? I’m out of the collar and out of the room, I’m heading to the nearest window to the outside now.> _

_ <Okay, we are all in position. Let me know when you want the A.S.W dropped.> _

Rey slipped quietly along the dim corridor on silent feet, the window she chose opened on to the back of the compound, as she carefully looked out of the window, she could see the space outside wasn’t empty.

_ <Okay, I’m at the window but there are guards around, one small noise and they’ll see me, do it now.> _

_ <Okay, brace for impact.> _

There were a few tense seconds as Rey waited, heart beating in her throat; then there was the sound of what sounded almost like a massive gun, and then an explosion, followed immediately by another somewhere off to the West.

Rey felt the impact only slightly, there was a moment of stunned silence, then shouting broke out and all the guards she could see were running in that direction.

Rey was already out the window and almost on the roof when Kylo said, _ <Now, Rey! Go now, as fast as you can!> _

Rey snorted to herself and concentrated on what she was doing, _ <I’m up on the first part of the roof and running> _ she shot back.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Hux had come through for them, Kylo couldn’t help being surprised as he listened to the explosion while Poe drove the van into position and pulled it to a stop, flush against the wall.

“I’ve got eyes on her! I can see Rey!” Finn’s excited voice came over the comms.

Kylo didn’t allow himself to relax, “Okay Blue Team, good, but you need to tell me what the guards are doing and shoot anyone who is going the wrong way… Red One, are you good?”

Hux’s voice was a little breathless as he replied, “I’m still alive. Moving out now, see you at the rendezvous point. You better be there.”

Kylo and the Knights got out of the van and Javiell climbed onto the bonnet and slithered onto the roof, keeping his body low so he couldn’t be seen by anyone on the other side.

Kylo, Zainmar and Leonmar melted into the shadows, eyes constantly moving as they waited for Rey.

_ <Let us know when you’re almost there and we’ll cut the wire.> _

_ <Will do.> _

Shots came from the direction of Ingalan and Finn. “Black Team, two bogeys coming your way, from the south. Our visual on them isn’t good,” Ingalan said, “We just lost sight now, so watch out.”

“Poe, get down out of sight, Jav stay utterly still. Keep the comms silent for a moment, unless there’s an emergency,” Kylo said softly as he unclicked the safety on his gun and heard Zainmar and Leonmar do the same...

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey had practically run across the roof of the main building, it was mostly flat and even the dome in the middle had flat skirting around it. She had stayed crouched as low as she could, listening to the shouting and clamour happening behind her.

When she got to the east side, she paused, eyes searching for a way down, _ <Kylo? Is it clear for me to jump? Don’t argue, it’s the quickest way down.> _

_ <Yes, but Finn says you need to do it now, guards are on their way.> _

Rey focused on the spot she wanted, took a few steps back, and jumped, tucking her legs in and leaning forwards, she was only three stories up and she had to extend her legs again almost immediately to absorb the impact as she landed.

Although she landed well, her bare, unsupported feet didn’t absorb the impact properly, she twisted her ankles as she tried to go into a roll, hissing at the pain.

Now was not the time to be weak though, pain could be ignored, she had ignored worse than this. She got up, staggered slightly, then started running for the part of the wall where she could sense Kylo. Her gait was slower than normal and rather awkward but there was nothing she could do about that right now.

As she reached the wall, Kylo said, _ <Rey! Behind you!> _

And Rey turned, dropping down to her knees and pulled the handgun out of her tucked up dress.

Her first shot went wide, but her next found it’s mark, and the ones after that. She took three guards down, she didn’t stop to check if they were dead, there simply wasn’t time.

Rey gritted her teeth, shoved the gun back in her dress and started climbing, she was oddly dizzy and felt faintly sick, but was almost at the top when arms came over the wall, grabbed her by the armpits and hauled her over.

“Hi Rey,” Javiell said happily from behind a veil as her legs cleared the wall, someone shouted not far off and shots were fired.

Javiell swore and pushed her off the roof off the van into Kylo’s arms, then slid down himself.

“Blue Team, get out of there, _now_.” Kylo said as he carried Rey round the back of the van and dumped her in it.

Rey grabbed her gun again, leaned around Kylo and shot the two guards that had been running up stealthily behind him.

Kylo sucked in a breath and turned, “ _Shit,_ okay everyone, throw the frags and we’re gone. _Go, go, go!”_

Rey stayed where she was as he grabbed what looked like _fucking grenades_ and started throwing them over the wall of the compound.

There were other bodies lying in the road, one's other than the two she’d shot. Suddenly Rey felt sad, as if she had robbed these boys of their innocence.

As the van sped off, explosions marking their exit, Rey realised the knife she had jumped with was inserted in her abdomen.

In hindsight, that hadn’t been a very clever thing to do.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As with the last chapter, I just finished this, but wanted you guys to have it ^_^ Next update probably Sunday!  
> Thanks so much for everyone who's commented, seriously, you guys keep me going ♥
> 
> Chapter title is: 'The Shit Hit's The Fan' in Huttese
> 
> Songs:  
> B.Y.O.B. By System Of A Down  
> The Wild Boys by Duran Duran  
> Battlefield by Svrcina


	80. Blood, The Price Of Freedom

Kylo waited in the shadows, ears and eyes straining to catch a glimpse of the guards Ingalan had warned them were coming their way.

He pushed his senses out, and felt them just before he saw them. They held assault rifles at the ready and were quickly advancing on the Falcon, Kylo let out a careful breath; _did he kill them?_ He could try using the Force _, but  what if it went wrong?_

Rey’s warning came back to him and Kylo gestured at the guards, throwing them back against the wall of the compound with a sickening crunch.

There was a moment of stillness, as if he were surrounded in a bubble outside of reality.

“ _Shit,_ Kylo, was that _you_?” Zainmar said through their comms.

Kylo swallowed as sound returned to him and he realised the guards wouldn't be getting up, “Yeah… I didn’t mean to do it that hard, though.”

“Chill Kylo, they would have shot us if you hadn’t done... _that_ ,” Javiell said.

It was small comfort, but he would think about it later. “Blue team, any more?”

“Not at the moment, you’re good for now,” Finn answered a little breathlessly.

_ <Kylo? Is it clear for me to jump? Don’t argue, it’s the quickest way down.> _

Kylo clenched his fists, “Blue team, is it clear for Rey to jump down?”

“Oh, blood and ashes, yeah, it’s clear,” Finn said unhappily, “But she needs to go now, they are moving away from the blast site.”

_ <Yes, but Finn says you need to do it now, guards are on their way.> _

“Javiell, cut the wire!” Kylo said as he felt a spike of pain over the bond, though it was quickly stifled.

Javiell cautiously sat up, poked his head over the wall to double check it was clear, then reached over and cut a metre wide gap in the razor wire before ducking down again.

“I think she injured herself, she’s running weird… _Shit!_ Kylo, they’ve seen her!”

_ <Rey! Behind you!> _

Shots were fired right behind the wall, men screamed, _Stars!_ Rey was so _close._ The bond thrummed, crackling with anticipation.

Then Javiell was up and leaning over the wall again, then dragged Rey back over the wall with him.

“They’ve been seen, _watch out!_ ” Finn yelled over the comms.

Javiell ducked down, swearing as he unceremoniously pushed Rey off the Falcon’s roof and into Kylo’s waiting arms.

The weight of her, the feel of her against him made him weak with relief as he carried her round to the back of the van. “Blue Team, get out of there, _now_.”

He put Rey in the back, mind still unfocused as he looked at her wide eyed face, he never sensed the guards coming up behind them, but Rey did.

She grabbed her gun and jerked her body to the side of his, as she calmly shot at them, Kylo turned in time to see them go down. _Fuck! He needed to focus!_ “ _Shit_ , okay everyone, throw the frags and we’re gone. _Go, go, go!”_

He heard shots from the front of the van ring out, as he grabbed some of the frag grenades and lobbed them over the wall before shutting the van doors on Rey and running around the side to check on the others.

There was a pained yell from Leonmar and Javiell swore, Kylo made it to the front to find more guards on the floor and Zainmar pulling Leomar into the van.

There were shouts behind them and Kylo grabbed Javiell’s arm and pulled him into the van too.

“ _Floor it_ ” Kylo shouted at Poe as he slammed the door shut.

The van roared away, bumping as it ran over a body and Kylo felt bile scorch the back of his throat.

He turned to look back at Leonmar and Zainmar, “What happened?”

Leonmar grinned weakly as Zainmar pulled his belt tightly around Leonmar’s upper arm, “Got shot. Thank fuck for the body armour though.”

“I can sort that out when we are clear,” Kylo said, “Blue Team, Red One, what’re your positions? Are you on target?”

“I’m there,” Hux hissed, “But I have a fucking knife in my leg… I’ll need help getting in the van.”

“We’re on our way, but are being persuaded.” Ingalan’s voice was breathless, “We’ll need to evac as soon as you turn up, we’re down to our handguns.”

“Okay, keep me updated. Hux, we’ll sort you out,” Kylo turned to the others, “Leonmar, you stay in the van, Zain, Jav, reload, be ready to cover the others as they get in. Rey, you doing okay back there?” Silence met him, “Rey?” _ <Rey!> _

“ _Shit,_ Zainmar, get back there! She isn’t responding!” Zainmar shoved his gun in it’s holster and scrambled over the seats to the back of the van, “Someone throw me a torch, I can see fuck all here.”

Javiell gave him one and Zainmar swore, “Oh, shitting hell, Kylo, she has a knife in her stomach!”

It felt like the sound had rushed away again, Kylo was just aware of his heartbeat throbbing in his head, he took a deep breath in, “Staunch it, plug it, do whatever you need to. We can’t stop now or we’re all fucking dead. We have to get the others, I’ll get in the back when we do and heal her, just, just keep her alive till we stop, okay?”

“We’re almost there!” Poe yelled as he took a corner at breakneck speed.

“Blue Team, Red One, we’re seconds away,” Kylo turned to Javiell, “Guns out, be ready!”

The Falcon came to an abrupt stop with a screech of tires and Kylo and Javiell leapt out to grab Hux, who almost fell against them, face twisted in a painful grimace, “About fucking time,” he hissed at them as they shoved him into the van next to Leonmar who started checking Hux’s wound.

Running footsteps echoed behind them and Javiell and Kylo turned to see Ingalan hauling a limping Finn along with him, four guards came round the corner after them and Kylo and Javiell ran forward covering Ingalan and Finn till they could make it to the van.

The guards opened fire, all four of them using assault rifles and without thinking, Kylo flung out his hand, halting the bullets in mid flight and freezing the guards in place.

Javiell sucked in a shocked breath. “Open the back door for me then get in the van,” Kylo told him through gritted teeth as he held his position, he was unsure what would happen if he dropped his arm or moved.

He heard doors slam and Javiell called though the comms, “Kylo, _now!_ We’re all in!”

Kylo exhaled, dropped his arm and ran to the side of where the bullets were aimed, then jumped in the van, pulling the doors shut as he yelled, “ _GO!”_

Once more the Falcon sped away as Poe pushed it to its limit, the van responded with the same sort of lurch you get when a plane takes off from a runway.

Zainmar was still in the back with Rey, hands pressing against the material of someones hoodie which covered the wound in her stomach.

“She’s still out cold.” Zainmar said, as Kylo tried to calm his breathing.

Kylo gave him a curt nod, pulled of his gloves and took Rey’s hand in his, the bond swelled at the contact and Kylo’s breathing evened out in response as relief flooded through him, Rey was still with him, still alive.

He cleared his mind and pushed the Force into her, knitting her ruptured organs and sliced skin.

By the time he was done, sweat was pouring off him and he irritably ripped the cowl and veil off, as he sat back with a heavy, shaky sigh.

Zainmar pulled the material away from the wound carefully to reveal a large, pink scar, “Do we have any bacta? We should probably bandage it as it looks delicate.”

“I don’t have any, but if no one else does we can stop and get some soon, the others will need it too.” Kylo brushed his fingers over Rey’s forehead gently and she stirred but didn’t wake. He let her sleep, she needed it.

“Zain, can you watch her?” Zainmar nodded. Kylo wanted to stay with her, but made himself move towards the seats with the others, “How is everyone doing?”

“Hux’s wound is bad, mine isn’t great but the bullet went straight through, Finn’s got two bullets in his leg and Ingalan has one in the shoulder,” Leonmar answered, voice strained with pain, “How’s Rey?”

“She’ll be okay, move aside, I’m coming over,” Kylo pulled himself over onto the back seats next to Hux who’s normally pale face was bloodless as his breathed tightly, “Leonmar, hold the torch up so I can see.”

Leonmar did, Hux’s thigh was a bloody mess, despite the tight tourniquet, “Hux, shut your eyes for a minute,” Kylo ordered gruffly, he didn’t like healing Hux before the others, but could see Leonmar was right, Hux was loosing too much blood.

Hux glared at him, “Why? You going to put me down?”

Kylo growled and grabbed Hux’s cold hand, “Shut up, I need to concentrate,” he closed his eyes, already drained from healing Rey, and pulled the Force into Hux.

Hux went rigid and gasped in shock as Kylo healed him; when Kylo opened his eyes again Hux’s eyes were wide and fixed on Kylo’s face, “What the hell did you just do?”

Kylo shrugged, ignoring the question, entirely, “You need to eat, drink some water and get some sleep,” Kylo turned to Finn and Ingalan, “You two next.”

Ingalan shook his head, “Do Leonmar, we need to stop and remove the bullets from us before we can be healed, and it isn’t safe to yet, we’re patched up and not bleeding too badly.”

Finn nodded at him and Kylo returned it, “Okay, but if you feel yourself getting worse or falling asleep, _you tell me_ , drink some water and eat something but don’t go to sleep, okay?”

They nodded and Ingalan grabbed water for them both as Kylo turned to Leonmar who offered him his hand slightly awkwardly.

When Kylo was done, he collapsed back against the seat, exhaustion pulling at his eyelids. “Kylo, you need to rest. I’ll wake you if we need you… Have you checked yourself for injuries?” Leonmar’s voice seemed to come from far away, “I’m fine, tell Zain he needs to keep any weapons away from Rey, she may not know where she is when she first wakes” Kylo managed to grate out before sleep took him.

 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Rey awoke with a gasp and tried to sit up, but someone pushed her shoulders back down so Rey punched them in the jaw.

“ _Shit, Rey_ , it’s me, you’re safe,” Zainmar’s voice said as he grabbed her wrists.

Rey blinked in the dim light as memory came back to her, she let her arms still, “Sorry,” she muttered sheepishly, “Where’s Kylo?”

Zainmar let her go and handed her a bottle of water, “He’s asleep, he had to heal you and some of the others and it wiped him out,” he pulled her into a sitting position and Rey drank half the bottle before putting it down, “How are you feeling? You had a massive fucking knife in your stomach.”

Rey winced, “I’m okay. Where are we now?”

Zainmar shrugged, “No idea, I can’t see out either,” he raised his voice, “Poe? Where are we?”

“We’re on the backroads skirting Molavar, no sign of pursuit, as yet.” Poe called back quietly.

Zainmar looked at Rey, “Do you reckon you’re up to healing? Finn and Ingalan still have bullets in them, and it should be safe to stop now, if we are brief.”

“Fuck, okay, yes, I can do that,” Rey said quickly, worry sweeping away any lingering fatigue she had.

“Poe, stop somewhere and Rey can do Finn and Ingalan,” Zainmar called.

Rey was still a bit shaky on her legs so Zainmar helped her out of the back of the van, Zainmar’s eyes went wide and he grinned in the light of the half moon, “Fuck, Rey, I know you’re covered in blood, but you look so hot in… whatever the hell that is.”

Rey blushed crimson and glared at him, “Find some alcohol, a sharp knife, and tweezers or pliers, needle nosed if you have them.”

She untied the material of the dress so it hung down again, making it _slightly,_ less revealing, before going round to the side of the van to see Ingalan and Finn.

“Peanut!” Finn yelled as he limped towards her, then caught her up in an awkward bear hug, “Oh my stars, I can’t believe we got you. I can’t believe you’re okay!”

Rey couldn’t help grinning as she hugged him back briefly then pushed him away, “You need to sit down, idiot, you’ve been bloody shot!”

Finn grimaced and nodded and she helped him sit on the edge of the seat as Zainmar joined her and held out a bottle of fire whiskey, one of _her_ throwing knives and some needle nosed pliers, _that were also hers!_

“Did you pillage my bedroom or something?” She asked suspiciously.

Javiell leaned around Finn to grin at her, “Yeah.”

Rey glared at him then shrugged and took her knife from Zainmar, “Someone needs to shine a torch or something too, the moon isn’t quite enough.”

“Here, use this one, “A pale hand came out from the side of Javiell and Finn…

“ _What the FUCK is he doing here?_ ” Rey yelled as she met the eyes of Hux. _FUCKING HUX!_

She was drawing her arm back to throw the knife at his face when Zainmar and Ingalan restrained her.

Hux smirked, “Nice dress, _Scavenger_ , guess Kylo didn’t tell you I was here then? _Typical,_ without _me_ , you would still be Jabba’s guest.”

For a second Rey struggled harder, then his words filtered through to her and she stilled, “What did you just say?”

Hux’s smirk widened but Javiell pushed him back into the van, “Shut up, Hux,” he turned back to Rey, “Hux proved to be useful. It’s a long story, maybe best we tell you once we hit the road again?”

Rey nodded grudgingly, _what the hell was going on?_ She shook Zainmar and Ingalan’s hands off her, “ _Fine_ , but the story better be a good one.”

She pushed any thoughts about Hux out of her mind as she knelt down and inspected Finn’s leg, then started cutting the right trouser leg off him, “Hope you have a change with you,” she said as she sliced the material away.

The two bullets were lodged in the meat of his calf and thigh, she looked up at him, “I’m not gonna lie, this is going to fucking hurt,” Finn nodded, eyes now round and worried in his dark face, “Have some whiskey,” she waded up some of the material she had cut away and handed it to him, “And bite down on this, Javeill, Zainmar, restrain him.”

Finn gripped Poe’s hand in his as he pushed the material into his mouth, grimacing, “Okay, deep breath and start slowly counting down from a hundred.” Rey poured some of the whiskey over the wounds, pliers and knife, “You need to keep him still,” she instructed then looked back at Finn, “Embrace the pain, don’t fight it.” His face scrunched up in confusion but Rey started to work.

First, she cut a cross into the bullet hole, pulling the small flaps of skin back, then she pushed the pliers in till she felt the bullet, gripped it, and pulled it out. Finn was screaming hoarsely behind the gag, the others holding him down firmly as Rey moved to the next wound and repeated the process. Once the other bullet was out, she shut her eyes and laid her hands on Finn’s bare, tense muscles, pushing the Force into him and sealing up the wounds.

When Rey opened her eyes, Finn was breathing deeply, eyes still closed as he held Poe’s hand in a death grip. “It’s done.” Rey said and his eyes flew open as Poe pulled the rag out of his boyfriend's mouth.

“ _Fuck,_ ” Finn gasped, he looked down at his leg then back at her, “Thanks, I owe you.”

Rey smiled and shrugged a little, “I owe you infinitely more.”

Zainmar helped Rey up from the ground as she was still wobbly, and Ingalan went and knelt down so she could get to his shoulder. Rey did the same for him, though Ingalan was stoically quiet throughout, hissing only once when the pliers went inside his flesh.

Rey washed her hands in some bottled water and wiped over the sealed wounds on Finn and Ingalan before they changed clothes.

“Do you guys have anything I could change in to?” She asked, grimacing and gesturing at her dress.

“Yeah, somewhere in the back of the van, I’ll go look.” Leonmar said.

“You should definitely keep that dress, though, Peanut. Just wash out the blood.”

Rey glared at Finn, “It’s not a dress! There isn’t enough of it to be an actual dress! I am _burning_ this _thing_ the first chance I bloody well get!”

“Kylo would probably like it,” Poe said, trying and failing to keep a grin off his face as he held Finn close to him.” Rey just growled.

“I’d like what?”

Rey turned to see Kylo sit up, blinking sleep out of his eyes, then they fell on Rey and he positively grinned as he took her in, “Yeah, Kylo _likes_ it.”

Rey felt herself blush even more as his gaze raked over her, she made an embarrassed, disgusted noise, threw her hands in the air and stalked around the back of the van to find Leonmar.

Kylo caught up to her as Leonmar was about to hand her a bundle of clothes. Rey squeaked as Kylo caught her up in his arms and she automatically wrapped her legs around his waist as he kissed her.

His lips and tongue were hot and delicious, rough and demanding against hers; _light,_ how she had needed this! The bond hummed between them as if it agreed.

They were so wrapped up in each other they had forgotten Leonmar was there too. He loudly cleared his throat and when that didn’t work, he said loudly, “You need to break it up, you two, we really should get moving again.”

Rey and Kylo’s heads turned to glare at him and he held up his hands, “Seriously, we should go, Jabba probably has people out searching, I doubt he wasn’t bothered by the mess we made.”

Rey sighed and unhooked her legs as Kylo set her down gently, “I’ll just get changed and we can go, I promise I’ll be quick- I’m freezing in this thing.”

Leonmar nodded then walked back around the van, Rey grabbed the clothes and Kylo shut the van doors so she had some privacy to change.

When she ripped off the dress, she looked up to see Kylo’s eyes locked on the scanty underwear she’d revealed, Rey rolled her own eyes at him, “Eyes front, soldier.”

“Don’t think that’s possible,” Kylo answered, voice a little strained.

Rey snorted at him and pulled on the black trousers, t-shirt, hoodie and a large pair of mens socks she had been given. She let out a small, happy sigh, she may not have any shoes, but she felt so much better for the change.

Kylo pulled her to him again, tucking her head under his chin as he held her tightly, “ _Light,_ I can’t believe we got you out, I can’t believe it’s over.”

Rey felt a warning prickle over her skin, “Don’t say that till we’re home,” she pulled away from him and he let her go reluctantly, keeping hold of right hand as he nodded.

“Okay, let’s get going then,” he told her as he pulled her around the side of the van, “there are only eight seats though, so you’ll have to sit on my lap.”

Rey could see that stupid grin was back on his face again.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs:  
> Chaos by Like A Storm  
> Blood Sugar by Pendulum  
> One Million Bullets by Sia  
> Escape by Jaroslav Beck feat. Summer Haze (Beat Saber Soundtrack!)


	81. Complications

 

Kylo was _overwhelmed_. Rey was curled up on his lap with her head resting against his shoulder. She was sound asleep, most of the others were too, but Kylo couldn’t bring himself to give in to the exhaustion that was trying to drag him under.

He wanted to savour this moment, the feel of Rey, once again, back where she belonged, safe in his arms.

Finn was sitting next to them, holding Rey’s hand tightly in his, even though they both now slept, neither of them had let go.

Kylo tried not to be jealous, he knew it was unreasonable, he knew they were just friends, but it was still difficult to push his possessive feelings down.

He moved his eyes away from their linked hands to glance out of the windscreen, the sky was growing light, slowly revealing Rey’s features to him. His thoughts drifted as he studied her sleeping face, memorising it’s contours, the scattering of freckles, the long eyelashes brushing her cheek, and her entirely too-kissable pink lips… his mind wandered further, going back to how she had looked in _that dress_ ; even blood soaked as it had been, he had never seen her in anything like it, anything so feminine or revealing, his mouth went dry just thinking about it… and she had been wearing that around Jabba’s compound… around _Jabba and all his guards_ … that man she had mind tricked, what had he been _doing_ in her room so late at night?

Kylo swallowed against the bitter taste of rage, and pushed it down. None of that mattered now, she was safe, she was with him, and she was _his._

Rey sighed restlessly against him and he quieted his thoughts, worried the bond would wake her if he continued to feel angry. He still wasn’t as good at muting it as she was.

He dipped his head slightly, so he could breathe in the scent of her hair, the familiar smell was comforting and he finally slipped into sleep, with his lips pressed against her head.

 

It was still early morning when he was woken by Hux poking his arm. Kylo lifted his head to glare at Hux, being careful not to jostle Rey, who was still asleep.

“ _What?_ ” He hissed at the other boy.

Hux glared right back at him, “We have a problem,” he hissed back, “There is a reward up for any information regarding a van load of Jawas, who are ‘ _armed and dangerous_ ’ and have kidnaped a _prized female slave_ belonging to Jabba Desilijic Tiure. The reward for information is 1,000 credits. For capture, _dead or alive_ , 10,000 credits. _And_ they have a picture of her.”

Kylo’s hands tightened on Rey as he blinked at Hux, trying to process what he’d just heard, _“Well shit.”_

“Indeed,” Hux answered with a wry twist to his mouth, cold eyes drifting down from Kylo’s till they rested on Rey’s face, “We need to ditch the Jawa disguises, change number plates and _somehow,_ change the way she looks… Or we are fucked.”

Kylo nodded at Hux grimly, “Okay, let’s wake everyone,” he raised his voice, “Poe? We need to stop. Somewhere quiet and out of the way would be best.”

“Sure,” Poe answered easily, “I’ve been taking back roads, so I can just pull in here, there’s no one around at the moment.”

Kylo nodded then looked down at Rey; he didn’t want to disturb her, but he didn’t really have a choice. He brushed the stray tendrils of hair out of her face and stroked her cheeks, “Rey?”

She muttered something and he couldn’t help smiling - somehow, she managed to look adorable, even though he knew she had killed a man, _probably men,_ just yesterday… _That really shouldn’t make him smile…_

“Rey,” he said more insistently and shook her gently.

Rey’s eyes suddenly snapped open and she sat bolt upright with a snarl, which quickly faded to embarrassment as she registered his face and looked down to see her hand still clutched in Finn’s.

“What’s happening?” She asked quietly, now smiling softly at Finn’s peaceful face.

“We have a problem, and need to sort a few things out,” the van came to a stop and he pulled the door open, letting her slide from his lap before he got out too.

Kylo left Rey to stretch as he and Poe woke everyone else up and they all got out and gathered round the back of the van to eat and talk.

Hux repeated what he had learned to the others and they set about changing out of their Jawa disguises. It worked better for Poe, Finn and Hux as they had other clothes that weren’t black, the Knights however, didn’t have any other options, neither did Rey.

“We’re going to need to buy you some new clothes,” Poe said as he looked at them critically.

Rey shook her head, “No, we should get them old clothes, me too. Don’t suppose anyone has a hat that could hide my hair?”

“I have a smashball cap,” Finn offered, and rooted around in his bag till he pulled out a blue Ranphyxes cap, and handed it to Rey.

Kylo watched as she undid the high braid her hair had been tied in, and pull it out the back of the cap as she settled it on her head, before tying it up in a tight bun.

“How’s that?” she asked and everybody studied her carefully.

“It helps, it shades quite a bit of your face,” Poe answered, then looked at Hux,”Is it different enough from the picture they’ve put out?”

Hux looked at his phone then raised his head to study Rey, Kylo watched in amusement as she folded her arms and glared back at Hux.

“It will have to do… Poe, you’re short, do you have a t-shirt she could borrow? Something baggy would change the shape of her body.”

Poe raised his eyebrows at that, then shrugged, “Yeah, I guess, though we do need to find her some shoes, and the Knight’s some colours.”

While Rey went round the side of the van to change, Kylo and Finn changed the number plate again, replacing it with the one they had picked up in Tatooine.

_ <I think we should mind trick Hux> _ Rey sent as he screwed the new number plate in, while Finn held it steady.

_ <What? Why?> _ Kylo asked.

_ <Because he saw me, saw _ **_us_ ** _, heal! He knows too much! Finn we can trust, and by extension, Poe, but there is no way in hell we can trust Hux further than an ant could throw him. > _

Kylo nodded slightly, then grimaced as he remembered she couldn’t see him, and Finn could.

_ <You’re right.> _

_ <And someone still needs to explain to me how the fuck he ended up here in the first place! Why didn’t you tell me?> _

Kylo winced inwardly, _ <You had enough going on without worrying about Hux. I am sorry, but knowing wouldn’t have helped you in any way… and to be honest, I’m not sure how far we would have got without him.> _ Though Kylo would never say that anywhere where Hux could hear him.

_ <Maybe. But it is suspicious, I don’t like it and I don’t like him. What were his reasons for coming with you?> _

_ <He always avoids that question.> _

_ <Kylo… isn’t he Snoke’s favourite pupil?> _

Kylo blinked and stood up as his mind started churning, he absently handed the screw driver to Finn, then walked a few feet away, running his hands distractedly through his already messy hair. _ <Yeah, but.. I mean, our Snoke isn’t the same as his mirror, surely? Wouldn’t we have felt something that... well, evil?> _

_ <We still don’t know who Jabba’s buyer was, the person who wanted me kidnapped. That Yoda person said our world was closely mirrored by his… So, if Snoke is evil there, wouldn’t he be evil here too?> _

_ <Maybe, but don’t forget, my mirror-self is evil there. He killed his own father…> _ Kylo swallowed, suddenly feeling beyond weary.

Rey must have felt his exhaustion because her next sending was gentle, _ <We don’t have to do anything yet, we’ve got the journey back to figure this out… And we should probably leave now, we’ve stopped here too long and we still need to find somewhere to buy you guys clothes and me some shoes.> _

Kylo walked back to the van, Rey was still standing outside with her face raised to the sun. She was wearing what must be Poe’s t-shirt, which was very orange and rather baggy.

Rey opened her eyes and looked at him when he was just a pace away, “ _Do not,_ say anything about this t-shirt,” she told him flatly.

Kylo just grinned and pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her quickly before reluctantly letting her go again, “We should get going.”

Rey made a small disappointed noise but nodded, “I could sit in the back? Surely I’ll just be giving you dead legs soon,” she said as he got into the seat nearest the door.

“We could take turns,” Zainmar offered, grinning at them from the seats in front, “only fair, we all helped rescue you, and you’re right, Kylo’s legs will definitely go dead soon.”

Kylo glared at Zainmar but the sandy haired boy merely grinned back, as Leonmar, Poe and Finn chuckled along with him, though, as Kylo turned to look at Rey, they may have been laughing at the blush that had appeared on her cheeks.

Rey yelped as Kylo just pulled her onto his lap and shut the door, “Why should I have to sit on your lap, Zainmar, you could sit on mine.”

“Rey, if anyone of us sat on you, you’d break,” Zainmar answered, still grinning.

“He is right Peanut, you’re too small,” Finn chimed in.

Rey glared at them, “I am not too small to kick all your arse’s, and I will, if you aren’t careful what you say next...”

 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

“I can’t believe he actually calls you Peanut.” Rey, and almost everyone else turned to look at Hux in surprise, “I thought he was winding me up or something.”

“That would be an odd thing to lie about,” Leonmar said after a pause. Hux just shrugged.

Rey shook her head and changed the subject, she didn’t want to get into anything with Hux just now. “Which route are we taking? It would be best if we can go a way that takes us out of Hutt territory.”

To her irritation, Hux agreed with her, “That would be sensible. Hand me the Satbox and I’ll set up a route. For now, let’s just head to the nearest town or place we can buy the things we need… in light of that, perhaps you should go in the back, even with the cap, you are somewhat… distinctive.”

Rey narrowed her eyes and folded her arms, “And _what_ , do you mean, by _distinctive_?”

She felt Kylo shift underneath her, as she looked at Hux’s pale face, past Finn and Javiell who were sitting between them.

The corner’s of Hux’s lips twitched upwards, as if he were fighting a smirk, “The bright orange t-shirt, of course.”

_Was Hux fucking with her? Was that a joke?_

“I’ll go in the back,” Leonmar offered breaking the tension between she and Hux, “I just want to sleep anyway, plus, Hux, isn’t it your turn to drive?”

Hux’s eyes flickered away from hers, “It is, but the knife wound in my leg is causing me a few problems still.”

_ <I thought you healed him?> _Rey sent to Kylo.

_ <I did, but I was really drained after your knife wound, it’s possible I wasn’t as thorough.> _He sent back.

“Why can’t someone else drive?” Rey asked aloud.

Finn looked up at where she was perched on Kylo’s lap, “No one else can, Peanut.”

_ <Was that one of the reasons you let Hux come with you?> _

_ <No… I’ll explain later.> _ Kylo told her evasively.

Rey frowned but didn’t respond to Kylo, instead she said out loud, “Well. When I have shoes, I can drive. I can probably spell you now, Poe, if you are tired?”

Poe raised his eyebrows, as did the others, “I can go till we find you shoes, but after that would be great.”

Rey nodded, “In that case, I’ll go in the back and sleep till you need me,” and she pulled the door open again to get out.

“I’ll join you,” Kylo said as he got out after her.

“ _Oh no you won’t,_ ” Finn said as he followed, “I’ll go with her, none of us need to hear you two making out back there.”

“He has a point, Kylo.” Leonmar called and Rey watched as Kylo glared back into the van.

_ <He's right you know, it’s probably for the best, for now. I really do need more sleep if I’m going to drive later.> _

Kylo huffed a sigh then nodded, “Okay, fine. Go and sleep.” _ <But sometime soon, I am going to get you all to myself, and I will show you no mercy.> _ Kylo smirked at her as he got back into his seat., as Rey felt her insides flare with heat.

She followed Finn around the side of the van and they got in, _ <If I can’t get to sleep now, I am blaming you.> _ She could practically hear Kylo’s grin through the bond.

Sleep did come to her though, and quickly. She and Finn cuddled up, despite the heat of the day. Finn had been the first person she could ever remember feeling safe enough to sleep around, and she drifted off surrounded by his warm, uncomplicated presence.

 

Rey came awake as her body alerted her that the van had stopped, for a moment she was disorientated - back in the Fett mobile prison, till she realised Finn was still cuddled up against her, and she breathed a sigh of relief.

_ <Rey? Are you okay?> _

_ <Yeah. Sorry, couldn’t remember where I was for a second, what’s going on?> _

_ <We are at an out of town shopping complex not far from Near Pando, it’s in Hutt territory, so we thought it best to leave you in the back for now… What’s your shoe size?> _

Rey cuddled up closer to Finn who was still blissfully asleep, _ <Six, try not to buy new things, though.> _

_ <All the shops here are for new things, I don’t even know where you’d go to get something that isn't new.> _

Rey snorted softly to herself, _ <I have no idea how you lot survived to get all the way to Tatooine.> _

_ <Your replacement t-shirt is going to be pink.> _

_ <I am not wearing pink!> _ _  
_ _ <Should have thought of that before you mocked our chivalry!> _

Rey swallowed a laugh, _ <You are quite right, good sir. Thanks for the rescue.> _

_ <That’s better… Hux wants to get you a dark red top, is that okay? Better than pink? I’d rather black, but that isn’t currently an option.> _

Rey curled her lip, _ <Not dark red, that’s Hux’s favourite colour… and it’s more of a girly colour anyway. Blue, or grey or green, we are trying to make me look like a boy remember?> _

_ <Good point. Okay, the others are looking at me weird, see you in a bit.> _

Rey rooted around in the dim light, locating all the knives and tools that the boys had lifted from her room before leaving school, they even had her knuckle dusters. She understood why they’d done it, but she wasn’t completely happy about the invasion of her privacy, all the same.

Rey tucked some of her knives away about her person, leaving a few ready to stuff into her socks once she had shoes on, and put the knuckle dusters in her pockets, then cautiously opened the door and peered out.

They had parked the Falcon at the edge of a large car park, the back facing away from the shops, so she got out and stretched, loosening the kinks in her back and rolling her shoulders.

“You shouldn’t be outside.” It was Hux, along with Poe.

“Where are the others?” She asked suspiciously, though Poe looked fairly relaxed.

“Getting themselves something to wear,” Hux said as he handed her a bag.

Rey shrugged and took it, sitting on the ground so she could put on whatever shoes they’d got her.

Rey smiled then frowned as she pulled out a pair of army style boots, “They’re great,” she said as she pulled them on, “But Kylo should have got something cheaper.” Hux just shrugged as he watched her, eyes unreadable.

There was a dark green t-shirt and a dark blue hoodie in the bag too, both over sized to hide her figure, again, they were too _nice_ , but she supposed none of the others looked very scruffy, so she may stick out if she insisted on something else.

Rey undid her bun and pulled the smashball cap off her head, then looked at Poe and Hux, “Please could you turn around for a moment?” She tried to phrase it like a request but it didn’t quite sound like one.

They both did though, without any fuss and Rey turned her back to them and pulled the orange monstrosity off, she had the new t-shirt over her head when Hux’s voice observed, “You really do have a lot of scars, did the branding hurt?”

Rey felt fury rush through her as she yanked the t-shirt down and spun to look at him, “What part of turn around for a moment, didn’t you understand?!”

Hux have her a thin smile, “A moment isn’t a quantifiable amount of time. Mine moment is clearly shorter than your moment.”

Rey opened her mouth, then closed it, trying to calm her anger before she did something stupid.

“Rey? Maybe put the knife down?”

Rey blinked at Poe who had also now turned around and was looking rather anxious, then she looked at her hand which was gripping her favourite knife.

She shoved it back in it’s sheath and looked at Hux, “It would be a bad idea for you to forget that there are no teachers here to protect you. There are _no rules_.”

“And you should remember, that without _me_ , you wouldn’t be here. You’d be back at Jabba’s Palace, _alone_ ,” Hux countered, in that silky tone of his.

“Perhaps,” Rey answered softly, though the warning in her tone was clear, “But because of my time with Jabba, and the Fett twins, I am currently still operating on my survival mode. Next time, you may not get a warning.”

They locked gazes till Poe awkwardly cleared his throat, Hux’s eyes flicked away from hers and she backed down, pulling the smashball cap back on her head and redoing her hair.

_ <Rey? What’s going on?> _ Kylo sent in a panicky voice and Rey realised she hadn’t heard him for a few moments.

_ <Sorry! Everything is fine. Just some issues with the t-shirt, but it’s fine now, don’t worry.> _

_ <I’m halfway back to the Falcon now anyway, the others aren’t too far behind me either.> _

_ <Okay. Did you get bacta? I like the boots by the way, thanks.> _

A odd surge of chagrin moved through the bond, _ <Hux found them actually, we were just going to get trainers, but he pointed out you always wear boots and that would be what you were used to driving in… and no, we forgot bacta, I’ll go back now.> _

Rey blinked in surprise, _ <Okay, it would be good to have it… and trainers would have been fine, I can drive in anything.> _ ...But she _prefered_ boots. It was unsettling that Hux had been the one to intuit that.

Rey shook the thoughts out of her head and hid some knives in said boots. When she stood up, Hux was gone. “Do I look like a boy now?” She asked Poe.

He cocked his head, “Mostly, your hair is a bit of a giveaway, especially coupled with your… chest, but I think that is only because I know you aren’t a boy. You will probably be okay.” He covered his mouth as he yawned.

“Why don’t you go in the back with Finn? I can drive from here and you look like you need to rest, how long have you been up?”

Poe frowned as he thought then shrugged, “Too long.”

“Go on then, go to sleep, the others should be back soon anyway.”

Poe nodded and went about settling himself while Rey went in search of Hux. To her surprise, she found him standing by the bonnet, smoking a cigarette. “Those will kill you, you know.”

Hux rolled his eyes as he answered, voice dripping with sarcasm, “ _Oh really?_ Why has no one told me this before?”

Rey shrugged, “How’s your leg? Can you show me? You said it wasn’t healed fully.”

Hux’s eyebrows raised and Rey felt an odd sense of satisfaction at surprising him, he took another drag on his cigarette before answering, “It still hurts and and the muscle is stiff.”

Rey frowned, it shouldn't be, but then, she and Kylo’s experience with healing wounds was very limited, “Show me.”

“It’s in my thigh,” answered, as if that were some kind of explanation.

Rey frowned even more, “Yes, I know that. But I need to actually see it.”

Hux let out a pain sigh with a streamer of smoke, “You don’t seem to understand, I’d have to take my trousers off for you to see it, and I don’t have a spare pair with me, the other ones now have a giant knife hole in them.”

Rey took a breath, “Hux, I don’t like it anymore than you do, but you need to show me… Kylo isn’t as good at healing as I am, I need to check it. If an infection or anything sets in, you are fucked, and by extension, so are we.” _Although we could just leave him behind…_ But that felt wrong somehow. _Light! How had she ended up in a situation where she_ **_owed_ ** _Hux?!_

Hux grimaced and dropped the butt of his cigarette, flattening it with his boot, “Fine. But round the back. We don’t want to draw attention to ourselves.”

Rey nodded curtly and proceeded around the back, Hux grabbed a hoodie then gave her a flat look, “Please can you turn around… till I tell you I am ready,” he said carefully, ignoring the irony of this role-reversal.

Rey turned around, she was tempted to disobey, as he had done to her, but she didn’t want to see anything that would be on show, so she waited.

“Okay,” Hux said awkwardly. Rey turned to see he had tied the hoodie around his legs to afford himself some cover, he looked ridiculous and she couldn’t help smirking.

It dissolved into a frown though, Hux’s wound wasn’t healed fully, there was no sign of infection, but it did look messy and painful. Kylo must have been more drained than he thought, she should check Leonmar’s arm when he returned to the Falcon.

She’d knelt down without thinking so she could look more closely, when she touched her fingers to his leg, Hux flinched and she looked up at him, “Stand still,” she ordered and placed her hands over the wound lightly, but still touching his skin, then closed her eyes.

The Force was humming, welcoming, as she used it to heal up the rest of Hux’s wound, which had been deep. She felt his muscles harden against her touch as he gasped in reaction to the healing.

_“What the hell are you doing?!”_

Rey opened her eyes to see Kylo’s shocked face staring at them, shock that was quickly turning to fury.

Rey let go of Hux and stood, “His wound wasn’t completely healed. I’ll need to check Leonmar’s, and do you have any?” Kylo just looked at her, wide eyes incredulous and Rey frowned, “What?”

There was a rustle behind her, which must have been Hux redressing, she didn’t turn to check, though.

_ <He had his trousers down and you were on your knees in front of him…> _

_ <I know that, I was there. I don’t understand why… oh… ah, yes. That was unfortunate timing.> _

_ <To put it mildly> _ Kylo sent and Rey could feel his anger waning, _ <Maybe warn me next time? Or wait till I can try again?> _

_ <Okay, sorry... Leonmar’s is on his arm right? No problems with me looking at that?> _

_ <Okay, let’s go have a look at him. Also, Hux is looking at us suspiciously, we should talk out loud.> _

Rey registered Kylo’s outfit for the first time since he arrived, he was wearing beige combat trousers and a white vest, “You look weird. I’ve never seen you in anything not black before.”

Kylo shrugged, “Needs must. Okay, let’s check on Leonmar’s wound.” He grabbed her hand and led her around the van, away from Hux.   

Leonmar’s wound was better off than Hux’s, but still needed work and Rey took care of it while Kylo handed round the bacta.

When she was done, Kylo insisted on rubbing bacta on her stomach wound himself, which the other Knights seemed to think was something that required spectators.

“Blood and ashes, Rey, how did that happen?” Zainmar asked.

Rey was quite distracted by Kylo’s fingers gently rubbing in the bacta, something so mundane shouldn’t be affecting her, but somehow it was oddly erotic. She had to look away from Kylo’s dark, intense eyes.

“I jumped off the roof with the knife in my hand, but I landed badly. I didn’t actually notice till I was in the van,” she shrugged, “I’ve had worse.”

“And yet you still jump off buildings?” Ingalan asked.

Rey shook her head, “No, this is the first time I’ve been seriously injured when jumping off a building, on purpose at least. I had numerous falls when scavenging though, most of my injuries came from climbing around scrap, it falling on me, or fighting.”

Kylo frowned, his eyebrows drawing into a deep V, the others looked appalled, _really, surely they had heard enough by now not to be so shocked everytime she mentioned anything about her life before Canto Bight?_

 

It felt wonderful to be back in the driving seat. It had been quite a while since she had driven anything and for the first time in ages she felt like she was back in control of her life.

And once they got back on to the open road, Rey discovered that the Falcon was some kind of mechanics wet dream, and she couldn’t help grinning as she put her foot down and the van responded - it could go twice as fast as the battered exterior would lead you to believe.

“Maybe slow it down a bit? We aren’t currently being chased,” Leonmar said somewhat nervously.

Rey raised her eyebrows, then shrugged and eased back a little, but she was still grinning, _this felt way too damn good._

Poe and Finn were in the back of the van asleep, Zainmar, Ingalan and Javiell were also asleep on the back seats, with Leonmar next to them, and Kylo was next to her with Hux on his otherside.

“I’ve been thinking, it may be worth getting hold of another vehicle, dividing us up; Jabba probably knows how many people were in your group by now. We’d convoy, but could fall back if there was any search made. Plus we need to ditch anything with blood on, and perhaps any grenades you have left as they are a dead giveaway.”

“But we only have three drivers,” Hux answered, “if we get another vehicle someone would be driving longer than they should.”

Rey turned slightly and realised Kylo was asleep, she let him be, _he must need it._ She looked back at the road, “How about a speeder? I can take someone with me on the back of one, and we can just use it while we are around Hutt territory, then dump it? Do you think you’re leg is up to driving now?”

There was a small pause and then Hux said slowly, “Yes, I think it is… you need to explain that to me, how that works, along with some other peculiarities.”

“I really don’t. Just be grateful,” Rey could feel Hux’s irritation at her answer, her grin never faltered.

“I take it you mean motorbike when you say speeder? How would we get one? None of us have id.”

“Yeah, motorbike, speeder, _whatever._ And I wasn’t suggesting paying for one.”

“And add grand theft auto to our list of crimes?” Hux’s voice replied with a sneer.

Rey turned to give Hux an eye roll, “It would be the least of our crimes. We left _bodies_ behind us, Hux, and went against a _Hutt,_ stealing a speeder would be nothing.”

“And yet it could be what leads to our capture. From here on out we need to be as inconspicuous as possible, which means not committing anymore crimes if we can help it.”

Rey sighed and shrugged, “Okay,” as she said it, she felt a prickle of warning race over her skin and she frowned, checking her mirrors carefully... but there was nothing overtly suspicious  behind them… yet she kept a careful eye out, after that.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, completely filler >< had Nickelback - 'Feelin' Way Too Damn Good' in my head for quite a bit of this...
> 
> Another shameless self promotion! I attempted to write a Reylo sort of fairytale type oneshot [The Warning In The Wind](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14949104)   
> And I am posting a new Reylo multichapter, which I will try and update weekly (but I won’t let it stop me from writing this!) I posted the first three chapters, I’d love to know what you think! ♥ [Trollskïr](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14956952/chapters/34660184)


	82. A Bump In The Road

To get out of Hutt territory, they had to first go further into it via Far Pando. And that is where they hit a real problem.

Rey abruptly pulled onto a side road, parking the Falcon behind some warehouses on the edge of the town.

“What are you doing?” Hux asked, a thread of sleep still clinging to his voice as he had just been dozing off.

Rey gave him a level look, “There was a road sign up, warning of delays due to random vehicle searches, we need to lose everything suspicious, and possibly split up.” She didn’t add an  _ ‘I told you so,’ _ but she didn’t have to. “Can you get out and wake Finn and Poe? I’ll wake the Knights.”

Hux rolled his eyes but got out of the van and Rey turned to Kylo, taking advantage of Hux’s absence, and kissing Kylo softly.

His lips curved against hers, and his questing hands found her waist and pulled her half over the handbrake and gear stick before he seemed to remember where they were. 

Rey pulled away and watched as his eyes slowly opened, they still had some kohl residue around them, and somehow, rather than looking silly, it made the brown of his eyes more lustrous, somehow more penetrating.

“You need to wake up, we’ve hit a problem,” she said softly, then moved back into the driver's seat and leaned over to shake Zainmar’s knee.

Kylo’s warm hand slid onto her thigh as he sat up and rubbed his face, “What problem?” He asked as Zainmar woke with a startled, “What?” 

“Wake the others, would you? We need to talk,” Rey told them both as Hux opened the doors, with Finn and Poe behind him.

Rey got out of the van to stretch her legs as the others roused themselves. Once they were all upright, Rey told them about the road sign. “It may just be routine,” she added, “But I think that is unlikely, and I don’t think we should risk it. I’d suggest using another car for a short time or one or two speeders, I can get hold of almost any vehicle we want, but it may be best if we wait till the evening to do it.” There was a pause as everyone digested the information.

“And when you say get hold of...?” Ingalan asked carefully.

Rey raised an eyebrow, “I mean pike. We would gain too much attention turning up and paying for a vehicle in cash, and without ids… I know only Hux and Poe can drive, but are any of you able to ride a speeder? Generally they are checked less as there is a lot less room to conceal things on them.” Everyone shook their heads. “Well, Poe, would you okay on one?”

Poe shrugged, “Yeah, I should be. I can take Finn on the back with me too.”

Finn’s eyes went wide but then he nodded, “If it isn’t for miles and miles, I guess that would be okay.”

“I can go on your one with you,” Kylo said, looking at her, but Rey shook her head.

“It would be awkward balancing you on the back,” she looked at the knight’s critically, “Javiell, you look like you weigh the least, are you up for it?”

Kylo snorted softly as Javiell grinned, “Sure.”

_ <Are you sure about this, about me not coming with you? I don’t like it> _

_ <I am. You’d make the bike back heavy, and the less of you in the van, the better.> _

“All right then, for now, let’s go through everything we have and get rid of anything particularly incriminating,” Kylo said out loud. “There are some hidden panels in the Falcon where we can keep anything we really don’t want to get rid of, but they will only fit so much.”

The group broke up and started going through the van, Rey sat down to check through her tools, making sure she’d have everything she needed.

_ <We could try just mind tricking anyone who tries to stop and search us, you know.> _ Kylo sent as he discarded some blood covered clothing behind some bushes, including than  _ ridiculous  _ dress.

_ <We could, but what if it went wrong? I only remember my mirror-self doing it with one person at a time, I don’t know if it can be done with more than that. If splitting up doesn’t work, it may be that we have to try it anyway, but I’d rather not rely on it and be out of options if we then fail.> _

_ <I don’t like being parted from you again.> _ Kylo sent stubbornly.

_ <It won’t be for long, and Javiell can wear one of the comms if that makes you happier. Plus, they’ll probably just wave us through and my face will have a good reason to be covered. Worry more about yourselves.> _

Kylo didn’t respond, but Rey could feel his unease at the situation all the same.

 

As the evening started to fade, Rey, Poe, Finn and Javiell said goodbye to the others and left them to search for speeders.

It had been decided to split up right then, in case they needed to make a quick getaway with the speeders and they didn’t want to lead any pursuers back to the Falcon. It needed to look as if the two groups weren’t connected, but she would be in contact with Kylo, as well as everyone having comms in.

“Oh, I forgot to say, you boys need to make sure all the kohl is gone from around your eyes, some of you still have smudges, which could be a dead giveaway,” Rey said through the comms and winced as Hux and Kylo both spoke at once.

“Good point, green leader,” came from Kylo.

“Acknowledged,” came from Hux.

Rey just rolled her eyes,  _ what was wrong with normal names? Boys were so silly sometimes. _

Kylo’s group was unsurprisingly Black team, Poe and Finn were Blue team and she and Javiell were Green team.

Far Pando was a relatively quiet place for somewhere in the Hutt territory, but there were still slaves everywhere, people carried knives and guns openly and there was an air of oppression that made Rey’s skin prickle uneasily.

She un-clipped her belt knife in case she needed easy access, though she had a gun in the back of her trousers too.

After some arguments, they had hidden three grenades in the Falcon and ditched the rest, along with the A.S.W. case, the heat sensitive binoculars and the assault rifles. But they had kept all the handguns and knives and stuffed the body armour in with the grenades.

The back of the van was much emptier but Rey had made sure it did not look too clean, just in case someone’s interest was piqued -  _ a group teenage boys in a tidy van?  _ That was just not believable.

Ingalan and Leonmar had gone out while they waited around and bought goggles for the Speeder riders, Rey had insisted on not getting real helmets as not many people wore them in the South, they just went with goggles and kerchiefs.

 

Rey followed her feet, knowing her instincts would direct her,  _ they always had _ . Unkar had often called her  _ uncanny _ , along with a lot of other things that were less than complimentary.

Poe and Finn followed quietly behind her, with Javiell bringing up the rear. Her feet led her to an out of the way car park, behind a large building that was closed down for the night.

The car park had three different exits, which made Rey happy, and she was even happier when she spied a line of speeders.

After having a good look around and finding it empty, she made a beeline for the bikes. “Javiell, Finn, keep watch, Poe, stay with me,” she said as she studied what was on offer.

At the end of the row, were two worn but reliable looking dual-sport speeders, they would perform well on the road but still give them the option to go off-road if they needed too. Rey cracked her knuckles, unrolled her tools then stuck a small torch in her mouth and got to work.

Her nimble fingers worked quickly, it was a familiar, almost comforting task, even though adrenalin was surging through her, her fingers remained steady.

Rey was done in five minutes, “Poe, get on, Finn, Javiell, it’s time to go. Goggles down and kerchiefs up over your mouth and nose.”

“Someone is coming round the corner,” Javiell said as he ran towards them.

“Poe, get going, don’t wait for us, we’ll see you later,” Rey said and Poe reluctantly sped off as Javiell reached her and climbed on.

There was a shout behind them, “Hold on tight!” Rey yelled as the bike engine roared beneath them.  

Rey grinned behind her kerchief as they swiftly left their pursuers in the dust. Javiell was gripping her tightly but moving with her, it felt rather intimate and weird, but she ignored it.

_ <We have the speeders and are on our way to the road out of town, going fast cos we were spotted, I’ll see you on the other side.> _

_ <Okay, we are on our way out too. Be careful.> _

_ <You too. I love you, Kylo Ren.> _

A wave of warmth flooded her through the bond,  _ <I love you too, my little Scavenger.> _

Rey snorted to herself but didn’t reply, no more distractions; she’d get him back later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Chewie’s humans were tense. Han was wandering around the plane as he spoke seriously into the small machine held to his ear.

They were on another barren field, they had stopped a few times on their journey, but it seemed that this was their destination.

“Jawas? Are you sure? ...Can you send me any photos you have? ...That’s great, Lando, thanks.”

Han put the machine in his pocket and Luke as Leia gave him searching looks.

“What is it?” Leia asked Han sharply as Han hesitated.

Han smelled strange, Chewie could detect something like pride mixed in with worry and surprise.

“Well, it looks like it was Jabba Desilijic Tiure that had Rey, but there was an…  _ attack,  _ on his compound and it seems as if she was broken out… by Jawas-”

Leia interrupted him, “Jawas? That makes no sense!” 

Han gave her a level look, “If you let me finish; the report of the getaway van sounds very like the falcon, though the number plate is wrong… from the descriptions, I think it may have been the boys dressed as Jawas, though where the hell they got all the weapons, they supposedly used, I really don’t know.”

Leia blinked at Han, seemingly unable to speak as her scent flared between confusion and worry.

“There has been a wanted alert sent out all over Hutt territory, with a bounty. If it does turn out to be them, they are in trouble. Though they have proved to be very resourceful so far.”

Luke shook his head, “ _ So far. _ But they didn’t have a bounty on their heads till now,” he made a frustrated noise, “I wish there was some way of  _ locating _ them!”

The small machine in Han’s pocket made a noise and he quickly pulled it out as Luke and Leia crowded close so they could all look at it too.

Chewie could scent that what they saw was the missing pups, as the humans scents roiled around them, a swirl of relief, with fear and more confusion, with frustration.

“That is definitely Rey,” Leia said quietly, “She looks surprisingly, _ well _ … and the Jawas, that one” she pointed at something on the machine in Han’s hand, “Is Ben, I’d know him anywhere, even covered up like that. So that must mean the rest of them are there too.”

“And as yet, they haven’t been caught, though it says there have been a few possible sightings,” Luke said, “But nothing concrete. The Jawa disguises would have been easy to discard of. I doubt anyone expects them to be a group of teenage boys.”

Han frowned, “Possibly, but kids in the South tend to grow up a lot faster, they leave school at fourteen, so it’s not a huge stretch… and The Knights are all pretty big, as it is.”

“They’ll be trying to get out of Hutt territory,  _ if t _ hey know about the bounty…” Luke suddenly exuded excitement, and Chewie cocked his head, “ _ Wait a moment,  _ Han, didn’t you used to have a tracking chip in the Falcon? Why haven’t we used that?”

Han grimaced, “I did. But it stopped working years ago, and I never got round to sorting it out.”

Leia glared at him furiously and Han held up his hands in a calming gesture, “It wasn’t like I knew Ben was going to steal it and go on a road trip, cut me some slack here.”

Leia folded her arms, a gesture Chewie knew meant she was very angry but unable to express it.

“Could it be hacked?” Luke asked slowly, “Do you still know the code for it?”

Han raised his eyebrows, “Yeah, I still have the code… It may be doable…” he tailed off as he frowned in thought.

“Then let’s not waste any time wondering, lets get it done. Do either of you know someone who could try and hack it?” Leia asked, voice suddenly brisk and purposeful.

Han nodded, “Maz is probably the best and most reliable one I know. I’ll call her now,” and he wandered off as he brought the small machine back to his ear.

Chewie yawned and lay down in the shade cast by one of the wings of the plane and Luke and Leia joined him.

Even though it was early evening It was hot here, as hot as the other place they had gone to first. Chewie did not like it.

“I noticed Rey was referred to as a  _ prized female slave _ ,” Leia said, her mouth twisting as her scent filled with concern, “What do you think that  _ means?” _

Luke shook his head, “She may have just been called that to make people more eager to find them, to explain the bounty. Try not to think about it too much, at least, not before we find them. Rey is a remarkably tough girl...”

Leia frowned, “ _ And _ … Luke,  _ there were deaths. _ If we are right and the Jawas are the boys, they have  _ killed _ … They left Canto Bight as children, but they will return as men… I am, I am at a loss to know what to do about that.”

Chewie did not understand this, _ if Ben-pup had killed, what of it? He was protecting Rey-pup and his pack. Han had killed, as had Chewie. Just over a day ago, Leia had been pleased when Han used his bangstick on those bad humans. So why was Leia sad? _

Luke sighed and put his arm around Leia’s shoulders, “We do what we can… I am not being flippant when I say that I would rather they had killed, than be killed. Obviously this situation should never have occured in the first place, but we must make the best of it. For now, let us concentrate on finding them, and bringing them home... At least it appears they all made it out of Tatooine alive.”

They stayed silent until they were joined by Han, “Maz got on it right away. We’ll know in an hour if it is possible, after that, it's anyone's guess.” He sighed as he sat and joined them in the shade.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Unfortunately for them, the stop and search point was no longer random and was now stopping everyone. Rey chewed her lip as they waiting in line,  at least Finn and Poe were already through, without any problems.

She could feel the tension in Javiell’s body, “Javiell? Don’t do anything till I say,” she put her hand over her comm and gestured for him to do the same, “If there are any problems, I have a  _ trick _ up my sleeve, but be ready in case we need to make a swift escape, okay?” Javiell nodded and they settled in to wait.

Kylo’s voice came on their comms, “Blue team, Green team, what’s your status?”

“This is Blue team, we are through and clear,” came Finn’s voice.

“This is Green team, we are waiting to be checked, it’s no longer random,” Javiell answered.

Rey felt a wave of worry through the bond before Kylo said, “We are just coming up to the queue now,  _ do not wait for us _ , go ahead to the meeting place. But if you are followed we will try and meet up in Daalang, the comms only work up to fifteen hundred metres, but once we all hit Daalang they should sync up again, everyone got that?”

“Loud and clear,” Finn said, voice now a little worried.

“Got it, Black leader,” Javiell responded, but none of the tension he felt had bled into his voice.

_ <Rey, you okay?> _

_ <So far, it’s almost our turn, so we need to concentrate. Speak soon.> _ Rey muted their connection a little, as she focused her mind on the Force. 

They didn’t have to wait long. They were joined by guard, wearing a uniform of sorts but nothing recognisable as real law enforcement. He had a torch which he shone over the speeder and then over them, “You need to show me your faces,” he said in a bored voice.

Rey and Javiell both tensed but complied, the guard paused as he looked at Rey, then pulled out a phone to look at something before looking back quickly at her, “State your name,” his tone held an undercurrent of excitement. 

_ Shit _ . “Yaejju Ventax,” Rey lied.

He studied her a moment longer before saying, “You’re gonna need to come with me, I need to check…  _ something. _ ”

Rey breathed in carefully, and drew on the Force, layering her voice with command as she said, “I am not the girl you are looking for.” 

There was a pause and then the guard repeated, “You are not the girl I am looking for.”

“We can move along,” she added.

Rey quickly pulled her goggles back over her eyes and the kerchief back up as the guard blinked, then waved at them, “You can move along.”

Rey didn’t pause, but she didn’t race away like a bat out of hell either, at first calmly riding away like they had nothing to hide.

“This is Green team are through, Black leader,” Javeill reported into the comms.

“Good to hear, Green team, we are up soon so will be without comms for a while, but we should see you soon, Black leader out.”

Rey’s muscles were still tense, as were Javiells, she didn’t think they’d be able to relax til they were all together again.  _ Stars willing, that would be soon _ , she thought, as she and Javiell left the lights behind them and disappeared into the night.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Writing this is for some reason going really, really slowly. Even after a pint of Baileys. So, sorry, I am (and this chapter is), shit.  
> Thank you so, so much for all the comments ♥ I am hoping that normal service returns soon!


	83. To Trust, Or Not To Trust

“This is Green team, we are through, Black leader,” Javeill reported into the comms, and Kylo breathed a quiet sigh a relief. There had been a strong spike of tension over the bond briefly just before that, and Kylo hadn’t been sure what it meant and hadn’t wanted to ask Rey in case he distracted her.

So, four of their team were through and now it was just those in the Falcon. “Obviously it will look suspicious if we are seen to be wearing comms, so take them out till we are through and hide them in your pockets... And everyone look as relaxed as you possibly can, we are just a bunch of teenagers, taking a year out to travel.”

“I don’t know that it is possible to relax right now,” Zainmar muttered.

“Just try and _look_ like you are, not actually be relaxed, Zain,” Leonmar muttered back as he furiously drummed his fingers on his knee, “ _Light,_ I could kill for a cigarette right now.”

Hux rolled his eyes but didn’t comment, his own fingers tapping on the steering wheel.

As they moved up the line of waiting traffic, Kylo began to feel a warning prickling on his scalp, he frowned as he pushed his senses out slightly, past the tension of the others in the van, questing towards… _something_.

_There,_ behind them. _Had they been found out?_ There was no way to tell right now, so he cleared his mind and connected himself to the Force that seemed to skitter all around them.

“Something is wrong,” he whispered quietly to Ingalan who sat next to him, “I don’t know what yet, but be prepared for anything, I don’t think it will be the guards, I think it is, or rather, _they_ , are behind us.”

Ingalan gave a small nod, as he whispered back, “Same warning feeling as before? Back at school?”

Kylo thought for a moment, then nodded, “Yeah, something like that.”

Kylo eased the handgun in its holster and Ingalan did likewise, at least in the South it was something that people would not be surprised by, every other person they saw seemed to carry a weapon of some description.

A couple of guards got to them, shining torches at their faces through the open driver side window, “You boys need to get out for a minute so we can’t look in the van.”

They had already agreed that they would probably have to get out, so no one hesitated in complying.

They slouched as much as they could, appearing as small as was possible. “What’s your reason for being here? Where are you headed next?” One guard asked as he watched them, while two others went through the van.

Kylo shrugged nonchalantly as he lied, “Road trip, we’re headed to Nal Hutta next.”

The guard nodded as he studied them, “You from the North?”

Kylo nodded, “Yeah, Maridun.”

Kylo gently brushed the guards mind, as delicately as he could, but there was no suspicion in it. It seemed they had chosen the right clothes - the guard thought them unremarkable, save for the van they were in.

So, _hopefully_ , nothing questionable would be found in the Falcon, and they’d be free to go…

“It’s a nice van, where’d you get it?”

Kylo shrugged again, catching a whiff of cigarette smoke from the direction of Leonmar, “Borrowed it off my dad, he’s a mechanic.”

There was the sound of the back door on the Falcon being slammed and then one of the two guards who had been checking it came over and nodded at the man who had waited with them, “You’re good to go, boys. Enjoy Nal Hutta.”

Kylo and the others were careful not to get back in too quickly before they headed off, everyone but Kylo breathed out a sigh, actually relaxing as they passed the block and moved away from the lights. Kylo could still feel that prickle of warning though, he put his comm back in his ear, “This is Black leader, we are through and on our way to you.”

“This is Blue team, we are at the meeting spot,” Finn answered.

“And this is Green team, we are just arriving,” came Javiell’s voice.

_ <Rey?> _

_ <Yeah?> _

_ <I think we have a problem, I don’t know what yet, but I have a bad feeling… Make sure you guys stay alert, okay?> _

_ <I feel it too. Something has been on the edge of my senses since just after Near Pando, but it has been off and on and not very strong, till now.> _

Kylo frowned as he mulled her words over, _ <In that case, I think it may be worth stopping somewhere for the night. We can lay low for a while, get a decent sleep and try and figure out our next move. We need to be on full form if we are going to come up against anyone… And if anyone is following us, they’d go past us.> _

He could feel Rey’s skepticism before he finished his sending, _ <If they get ahead of us they could lay an ambush.> _

_ <That would only be if they go the same way as we do, and what is the likelihood of that?> _

_ <If they know who we are, they’ll expect us to be heading out of Hutt territory, there aren’t that many alternative routes from this direction and finding another would mean going further in first, which I don’t think is a good idea, for obvious reasons.> _

_ <And if they catch up to us soon? Face it Rey, the adrenalin we were running on since Tuesday night is almost gone, I know we’ve all slept a bit today, but not deeply and we could all really use a shower. The guards who checked us over didn’t have any suspicions about us at all - I checked.> _

_ <The one who checked me, did, I had to mind trick him.> _

Rey was being stubborn, but Kylo was feeling more and more like this was the right decision, _ <So we’ll keep you hidden and smuggle you in, please, something is telling me we should do this, I need you to trust me.> _He pushed the rightness of what he was feeling over the bond to her, and felt her let go slightly.

_ <Okay, but we should keep the speeders for now, in case we have to split up and get away quickly.> _

_ <We’ll find somewhere suitable, and get back to you soon.> _

“Zain,” Kylo said, tapping the other boys on the shoulder, “Have a look on the Sat box for any place off the road that we can get rooms in for the night, I think it’s time we had a proper rest and cemented our plans.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Hux asked, his tone clearly indicating that he did not think so.

“Yes,” Kylo answered shortly, he caught a curl of Hux’s lip.

“I think it’s fucking fantastic,” Leonmar added, “I miss sleeping in a bed, and I am pretty sure this is the worst I have ever smelt.”

Zainmar laughed and nodded as he checked the Sat box, “Actually there is a place just a few miles past where we’ll meet the others, the Sat box doesn’t really give any details but we should check it out, it’s about a mile off the main road.”

“Cool, let the others know and they can go on and check it out now, saves us some time if it isn’t suitable,” Kylo told Zainmar... _and it means if there is anyone following us, they won’t see us join up on the road,_ but he kept that to himself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The place Zainmar had directed them too looked good, it had not been well signposted, and the road it was on was small and winding.

Rey and Poe had pulled up a little way before it so Javiell could go and check it out first.

“It looks quiet, but not dodgy,” Javiell told them over the comms, “Only a few vehicles parked, there’s a light on in the reception and all the rooms are on the ground floor, so if we have to get away in a hurry that won’t be a problem.”

“Any other ways out, other than the one road?” Rey asked.

“No, just that one point of access,” Javiell replied, “but this far from the main road, we’d hear someone coming, all we’d need to do is divide the night up, so everyone does a short watch, there are eight of us now.”

“ _Nine,_ there are nine of us,” came Hux’s irritable voice and Rey smirked, she wouldn’t have counted Hux either.

“Okay, we’ll join you soon, go see what rooms are on offer,” Kylo said, ignoring Hux’s comment entirely.

Rey frowned, then pushed out of her senses... somehow, this place felt _safe_ , and she had to concede that maybe Kylo was right.

Rey hadn’t slept somewhere nice in over a week, and she had to admit, the boys really did need showers…. she grimaced at herself, she’d been away from Jakku less than two months and already she’d grown soft.

“All right then,” she looked at Poe and Finn, “You guys go ahead, I’ll just wait for Javiell to get back and we’ll follow you,” she said.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Sidi Driss Inn, was more like a b&b or motel than an Inn, Kylo thought as Hux parked the Falcon next to the two speeders. The buildings were squat, the bottom half painted white, the top left untreated, the colour of the earth. There were lots of plants working their ways up the walls, some on trellises and others just clinging to the clay. The walls looked thick, presumably to keep the heat out.

_ <I’ll stay outside and join you once you have room keys,> _Rey sent as he walked with the others towards the brightly lit reception.

_ <Okay, shouldn’t be too long… Just so you know, once I get my hands on you, I am not letting go till tomorrow morning.> _ He felt his blood heat at the thought.

Rey somehow managed to sound breathless inside his head, but she only replied, _ <What, even if I need to pee?> _ Kylo didn’t dignify that with an answer.

The lady at the reception treated them to a warm smiled, it was the first genuinely welcoming expression Kylo had seen for a while. She introduced herself as Dama, as they asked for five rooms.

Her round face frowned a little as she counted them, “Surely you will want four?”

Hux shook his head, “We have another with us but he is waiting outside as he was feeling a little travel sick.”

“Oh, poor dear, I’ll give you a bucket to take with you, I’d rather he not sick up in the room. It is slightly late, but would you boys care for dinner? I can have it sent to your rooms, it won’t be anything fancy, but I know how hungry young men can be.”

Hux smiled, it looked slightly pained, but she didn’t seem to notice, “That would be lovely, thank you.”

“And you’ll be wanting breakfast too?”

“Yes, could we have a wake up call for 8am please?”

“Of course. Breakfast is from 7am-9am, check out is 10am. There are towels already in the rooms. We aren’t very busy so you can have rooms next to each other,” she handed Hux five key fobs, “They are on your right as you go out the door, you’re dinner will be about twenty minutes.”

Rey appeared by Kylo’s side as they made their way to their rooms, and Kylo caught her hand in his, breathing a little easier now she was with him.

“So, who’s going with who?” Asked Zainmar, as they came to the first of their rooms.

Kylo’s hand tightened on Rey’s as he said, “Rey and I will share.”

Hux cleared his throat, “Wouldn’t it be more… _appropriate_ for Rey to have one on her own?”

Rey rolled her eyes, “No one cares about appropriate.”

Kylo gave Hux a small, satisfied smile, and Hux’s already cold gaze turned wintery.

“Finn and I will share,” Poe said happily as they too, linked hands.

Hux folded his arms, “I’ll take one on my own.”

“We’ll take the far room, lets all meet there once we’ve showered and eaten,” Kylo said and everyone nodded. “Let’s say forty five minutes,” he threw over his shoulder, already pulling Rey towards their room.

The room was basic but looked clean and comfortable, so long as there was a bed and a shower, Kylo would be happy.

As he closed the door behind them, he and Rey were suddenly plunged into a bubble of quiet. This was the first time they had been properly alone in what felt like years and Kylo suddenly felt unsure of himself, he lingered by the door, watching as Rey studied the room carefully, testing the locks on the window, then went into the bathroom to check the window in there too.

“It’s big enough to climb through,” she said as she tested the lock, “Easy to pick, but it will also mean we have an escape route if we need one…” she turned and noticed he was still standing by the door.

As she came back into the bedroom her eyes followed his and fell on the bed, Kylo looked up at her as he felt a small wave of uncertainty, along with a little thread of nervousness and desire. It was a double bed.

Kylo swallowed, he was tempted to just sweep her up and throw her on the bed, or carry her into the shower with him, but… “You should shower first, someone will be bringing food soon and it’s best if they don’t see you’re a girl, I’ll hop in after you.”

Rey nodded, eyes never leaving the bed as Kylo dumped his backpack down on the floor, “Rey?”

She jumped slightly then nodded again and headed into the bathroom without saying anything. Kylo was sorely tempted to just follow her, but he knew he’d lose track of time if he did that, and she may need some space anyway, she’d been a prisoner for days. He sighed slightly as he realised he needed to let her come to him.

He considered lying on the bed while he waited but decided he’d probably fall asleep if he did that and he may also make it dirty. Shower, food, meeting, then bed, in that order.

So he paced, stretching out sore muscles and loosening joints from the stresses of days sitting in the Falcon and then all the action from Tuesday night.

He couldn’t believe they had been gone for less than a week, it felt so much longer, like so much more had happened… and _what should they do now?_ Now that they had stopped, the feeling that had been guiding him had dissipated, _did they go on as they were before, or did they go further in to Hutt Territory to avoid the possibility of an ambush?_

He was no closer to answers when a knock came at the door, before opening it he brushed the mind of whomever was out there, _just in case_ , before opening it.

It was Dama herself, bearing a loaded tray balanced on one arm and a large bottle of water under her other arm.

She smiled at him as he took the tray from him, “Thank you, dear. That should keep you going till breakfast,” she paused as she looked at him, “You know, you remind me of someone, it’s on the tip of my tongue, but I can’t quite remember, do you have family in the South?”

Kylo shook his head, suddenly nervous that there was now a picture of him added to Rey’s in the bounty details, “Not that I know of… Thank you, this looks great.”

Dama beamed, “You’re welcome, I hope your friend feels better enough to eat. Sleep well and I will see you for breakfast.”

There was nothing threatening about her at all that Kylo could detect, so he shut the door and put the tray and water on the bed.

The food was simple, as Dama had said, but it all looked very good after their recent van diet; there were bread rolls that looked as though they had been made today, butter, crumbly white cheese, slices of some sort of dark meat, plain crisps, salad leaves, dried apricots and red grapes.

His mouth watered just looking at it all and he sat on the floor and started piling things onto one of the empty plates.

He was almost done when Rey came out of the bathroom, she had a towel wrapped around her, baring her legs from mid thigh, hair still dripping on her shoulders. Kylo swallowed his mouthful and set his plate on the floor.

“All yours,” Rey said, a little flush to her cheeks.

“Thanks,” Kylo answered awkwardly and she moved out of his way as he made his way to the bathroom.

He shut the door behind him and stripped down, before he got in the shower he noticed the sink was full of water and had… he took a calming breath in, the barely there underwear Rey had been wearing was soaking in the sink.

He shook his head at himself and got in the shower, Kylo quickly decided this was the best shower he had ever taken, the water pressure was rather weak and the water wasn’t hot, but it felt _so damn good_ sloughing off the accumulated sweat, sand and dirt off his skin. As he watched the dirty water go down the plug he was fairly certain he would weigh quite a bit less once he was done.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey didn’t know why, but as soon as the door had closed she and Kylo in their room, she had suddenly had an attack of nerves, _it was stupid_ , but in being alone with him she had suddenly regressed into an awkward desert rat.

The shower had been good, washing away Tatooine and Jabba from her skin had felt symbolic, but once out of it she had realised she didn’t have a change of clothes. After Kylo was in the bathroom, she had a look through his bag, hoping he wouldn’t mind. He, at least, seemed to have extras of boxers and vests, so she chose a black vest top and the smallest pair of boxer shorts he had.

They were both comically too big for her, so she tied a knot in the bottom of the vest and folded the elastic waistband of the shorts over to make them tighter, then she combed her fingers through her hair as best she could and wrapped it in the towel.

Once she had pulled her jeans on over the boxers, she sat down on the floor and started eating. _Everything was good,_ the cheese was tart and sour, the camel meat was lightly spiced and all of it deliciously fresh. Rey wondered if in this part of the South they made tea the way she did, perhaps she’d be able to buy some Marmaraya leaves to take back home with her…

She’d been ignoring the bond, too wrapped up in eating so the sound of the bathroom door opening made her jump slightly.

Kylo came out, wearing just a towel and Rey forgot to breathe. There were still beads of moisture dotting his skin, his wet hair clung to his neck, already curling slightly. The towel was set quite low on his hips, the lines of his abs and inguinal crease sharply defined… Rey realised she had been staring and hurriedly looked away, trying to breathe normally as she tried to suppress the yawning chasm on need that had just opened up inside her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo realised absently that Rey was wearing one of his vests, but he was too busy trying to separate the swirl of feelings that were coming from her through the bond, to appreciate it. He felt the feelings mute abruptly, and she stood, distractedly brushing crumbs off her jeans as she walked towards him.

“I borrowed some of your things, I hope that’s okay?” She asked softly, eyes not meeting his.

“Of course,” Kylo said lamely, and she nodded and sidled past him into the bathroom. He could hear splashing noises and guessed she was wringing out the garments she’d left soaking.

As he picked out clean clothes to wear, he suddenly felt very self conscious, Rey was in the bathroom, but the door was open... _so where did he get dressed?_

Only way to do it was quickly, he decided, and turned his back, dropped the towel and quickly pulled on his boxers. He abandoned his non-black clothing for now and went back to what he was comfortable in.

A glance at the clock told him it was almost time for the others to arrive and he walked over to stand in the bathroom door, Rey looked up from where she was hanging her things up to dry.

“Others will be here soon,” he told her quietly, carefully not looking at the hanging garments.

Rey nodded, then sighed tiredly, without thinking Kylo automatically closed the few paces between them and pulled her in for a hug.

Rey was tense for a few seconds, then melted against him, wrapping her arms firmly around him as she nestled her head under his chin.

Kylo let out a sigh and the tension in him also fell away. Rey smelled of his deodorant, of clean, wet hair and warm skin. It was a moment of perfect calm, and Kylo closed his eyes, resting his head on hers as he gently stroked her back.

They both started slightly as a knock sounded on their door, “Are you okay?” Kylo asked, she nodded, giving him a small smile and Kylo let her go regretfully, so he could answer the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey pulled their bathroom door almost closed, so none of the others would see her underwear drying. She felt better after their brief embrace, but she was tired, the feeling of being somewhere sort of safe was acting like a soporific and she had to remind herself that they were still in Hutt territory, they had a bounty on their heads and it was a _long_ way home… and there was still the mystery of Hux. Rey frowned to herself, she still hadn’t gotten a proper explanation about Hux’s presence.  

And speaking of that red-haired devil, there he was as Kylo opened the door. Rey watched him as his eyes swept their room, lingering slightly as they registered the bed, then moved to flicker over her and away again. _Just what the hell was he doing here?_

The others followed him in, all looking as weary as she felt, though better for a shower and decent food.

“This was a really good idea,” Poe said as he and Finn settled on the floor, Finn nodding his agreement.

“So much,” added Zainmar, flipping still dripping hair out of his eyes.

The others made noises of agreement as they all sat on the floor unintentionally forming a rough circle.

“So, where are we heading tomorrow?” Ingalan asked, looking at Kylo.

Rey watched as Hux’s jaw clenched slightly, the dampness of his hair make it a darker shade of red... she flicked her eyes away as he noticed her studying him.

“We have three choices,” she said as no one seemed to want to start the ball rolling, “We either leave Hutt Territory on the quickest route possible, take the quiet back roads, or go further in to confuse anyone of our trail before leaving a less obvious route… and we can either ditch the speeders, or keep one or both of them. I think at least one would fit in the back of the van if we wanted to take one but not ride it.”

“Have you seen any updates to the bounty details, Hux?” Kylo asked.

Hux shook his head, “Other than a few supposed sightings, none of which are anywhere near where we have been, there is nothing new… You said, anyone on our trail? Why? Do you know something I do not?”

He directed that last part to Rey and she gave him a bland look back, “I _know_ nothing, but it is a probability we should consider.”

“So far, your disguise and keeping you hidden seems to have worked, and we all look really different to how we did in Tatooine; our only weak spot is the van,” Poe said.

“At least it is fairly nondescript from the outside, I’ve seen plenty other vans like it since we’ve been in the South,” Ingalan added.

“So, the options? Does anyone have a preference or a reason they think one would be better than another?” Kylo asked, bringing them back on point.

“Well if we back road it, we stick out more, but we also won’t have as many witnesses if something does go down,” Finn said, “The quickest route will be busy, so there’s safety in numbers, but I think that is what we’d be most expected to do. The least likely is to go further in, but I think that would be pushing our luck too much, so I’d vote back roads.”

It didn’t take them long after that to settle on using the back roads, though it was agreed they’d check on any possible roadblocks or bounty updates in the morning before they left. They also agreed on a watch rota for the night, and Rey volunteer for the first one.

Finn gave Rey a bear hug before he left, muttering tiredly in her ear, “I’m so glad we got you, Peanut.”

Rey smiled as she hugged him back, “Me too, I’m even looking forward to going back to school.”

Finn chuckled, “Bet you never thought you’d utter that sentence! Though, me too. Adventures are _hard_.” Rey just nodded and he and Poe left, shutting the door behind them.

Rey turned from the door to look at Kylo and he gave her a lopsided smile, “I think if I don’t go to sleep now, I may just pass out where I stand.”

Rey felt her face soften as she smiled at him, “Then get in. I’ll sit my watch outside,” he made an unhappy noise but she carried on, “I have knives and my gun, _I’ll be fine._ And we have to bond. Just go to sleep and I’ll wake you when it’s your turn.”

It was a mark of his exhaustion that he barely argued, he literally fell into bed, asleep before Rey closed the door behind her.

Rey settled on the porch, almost all the lights were off and the stars were incredibly bright. She hadn’t spent any time with them for quite a while and she found herself smiling up at them, listening to the sounds of the nocturnal wildlife going about their business.

It was a tranquil pause in all of this, and Rey thought again that this was a good place, something about it felt _right_. She let Kylo sleep, taking on his watch as well - being outside had energised her somehow and she didn’t feel nearly as tired as she had after her shower.

Halfway through Kylo’s watched, there was a soft noise and Rey unsheathed her knife, merging into the shadows as she looked for the source.

It was Hux. He lit a cigarette and sighed as he exhaled, pale skin catching the light of the half moon as he glanced up and down the porch, obviously looking for whomever was on watch and Rey silently materialised out of the shadows once more.

Hux jumped slightly then shot her a glare, Rey smirked slightly and sat back down, slipping her knife back into its sheath.

“I thought it was Kylo’s turn now?” Hux asked quietly as he joined her, Rey turned to flash him a glare and he moving a few paces away before settling.

“It was, but I’m awake and he seemed really tired.”

“But you’re one of the drivers, isn’t it more important you sleep, then him?”

Rey shrugged, “I don’t sleep much, and it’s nice out here.”

Hux looked around as if trying to work out what was nice then shrugged to himself, apparently unable to appreciate the night like she did.

“Is it because you just didn’t want to share a bed with him?” Hux asked and Rey carefully did not tell him that she and Kylo had slept together on several occasions.

“Why are you here?” She asked instead, “What motive could you possibly have for coming with the others?”

Hux let out a sigh, as if exasperated by her rudeness, “My leg is pretty much normal now, by the way.”

Rey rolled her eyes and shrugged, it had been more a statement than a thank you. She tried tentatively brushing Hux’s mind… yet it was as if his head were empty, she could sense almost _nothing_ from him. _Was that even possible?_ Even when Kylo blocked her out she could sense some things... _though perhaps that was due to the bond;_ but even so, it made her more than suspicious of him than ever.

They both remained in an uneasy silence until Rey judged it was Ingalan’s time to watch. She stood up, stretching to unkink her back and Hux stood too.

“I’m awake, I can take this watch,” he said as he lit another cigarette.

Rey frowned and Hux rolled his eyes, “Surely by now I have shown myself to be trustworthy?”

Rey folded her arms, “No. If you want trust, it has to be earned. You seem to have been really useful, but I get the impression you’ve been too close-mouthed about a lot of things and still haven’t explained why you are here. By all means keep your secrets, but don’t be surprised when we don’t trust you.”

Before he could answer Ingalan slipped out of his room and walked softly towards them, “Where’s Kylo?” He asked as his eyes took in both she and Hux.

“I was quite awake so I let him sleep,” Rey told him as she turned to go, “See you tomorrow.”

Rey locked their room door behind her, and as she pulled her boots and jeans off, her fatigue hit her solidly and she crawled into bed.

At least the mattress was firm, she would have liked to move the bedding onto the floor but there was only one set. Happily it didn’t stop her from falling asleep and she slipped away quickly to the soft sound of Kylo breathing.

  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry guys, muse is still coming slowly. All of the filler all of the fail.
> 
> Also, re: the pint of Baileys, I couldn’t see the point of constantly refilling a small glass. I am an efficient drunk (sometimes... other times I spend three hours chatting with a boa constrictor or lose time having a heart to heart with a turkey).


	84. Despacito, Mi Amor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, slightly messed with how I normally do POVs in this chapter, hope it makes sense… Prepare for smut...

 

Kylo awoke from a very good dream, to find he’d pulled Rey against him as they’d slept. There was the faintest possibility of dawn showing around the edges of the curtains and he realised she’d never woken him for his stint on watch.

Rey moved against him, sighing softly and he was suddenly aware of his raging erection. He tried willing it away, but it stubbornly persisted, so he very gently disentangled himself from Rey and moved a little away from her. A small sound of protest came from her and she wriggled after him, till he was perched precariously on the edge of the bed. If he moved anymore he was going to fall off.

He tried giving her a little push back to her side of the bed and managed to get room enough so he was off the edge, before she came back, turning to face him and flinging a leg over his hip.

Kylo swallowed. The leg was bare. He swallowed again, if her underwear were drying in the bathroom did that mean she was… he couldn’t stop himself skimming his fingers up the outside of her leg. But no, she was wearing something.

She sighed again and pressed herself against him and he couldn’t stop the sharp breath that escaped him as she brushed against his erection.

“Kylo?”

_Fuck._ “Shhh, go back to sleep,” he whispered as he brought a hand up to stroke strands of hair away from her face.

Wide eyes looked back at him, then she cuddled up to him further, he tried to breathe evenly but she must have felt him tense because she pulled away, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, fine. We’ve got a few hours yet at least, go back to sleep,” he stroked her cheek, hoping to lull her back into slumber.

But then she moved and tensed herself, “Ah,” she breathed as she brushed against his groin, he felt her wake up further.

“You should rest,” he insisted, “You may need to drive later and you already took my watch.”

In answer, she reached up and pressed her lips softly to his, without any rational thought his hands slipped under the sides of the vest she was wearing.

Her lips were warm, soft against his and he slipped his tongue between them, loving the little needy moan she made as he did so.

They kissed slowly, reacquainting themselves as they did. One of his hands moved back to the leg still hooked over him, and she shivered slightly.

Kylo pulled back, curiosity getting the better of him, “What are you wearing?”

He could feel her flush through the bond, “I borrowed a pair of your boxers, just till my stuff has dried.”

For some reason, the idea of her in his boxers made his cock throb, and he felt her desire spike in response. He growled, pulling her lips back to his, pushing her vest up so he could palm a breast as he slipped his fingers inside the boxers she wore.

Her hands roamed his chest, gliding over his skin lightly, leaving goosebumps everywhere they touched.

His fingers found the wet heat between her legs and she shuddered as soon as he touched her,  growing wetter as he started moving his fingers against her.

He felt her thoughts begin to scatter as he moved, felt her try and reciprocate as her fingers brushed against his boxers… he smiled as she lost herself. He loved these moments, when she stopped fighting, when she surrendered utterly, when she was his completely.

It was the sounds she made, the way she lost control over her body as pleasure filled her, as he gave her everything... And then she came apart.

As she came down, he slithered down the bed, pulling the boxers she wore with him, then settled himself between her legs, waiting for her to become lucid.

“What?” She asked and he grinned before placing his mouth against her.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Rey had gone from fast asleep to aroused ridiculously quickly, and now Kylo had somehow made it between her legs and was torturing her in the most perfect way. He made her weak, just a ball of sensations, each one exquisite, each one overwhelming.

He held her hips firmly as he lapped at her, somehow, not being able to move when she came made it all the more intense.

As he worked, a deep, burning need was building in her, and it only got worse as he slipped a finger inside her. There was something else she desired, something else she… _needed._

As her hips tried to thrust with his finger, she realised what it was. For the barest moment, she was afraid of this new hunger, but that fell away as the hunger grew.

_ <Kylo?> _

“Mmmm, I’m not done yet, little scavenger,” he hummed against her, the vibrations making her want to wriggle.

_ <Kylo… do you… do you have a condom?> _

He stilled completely, frozen as the bond rebounded with shock and intense desire, “Did you just…?” he asked, in a voice gone hoarse.

Rey nodded slightly, still shivering, “Do you?”

“Are you sure? We don’t have to. We never have to, I could die happy right here…”

Everytime his spoke his breath caressed her sensitive flesh, “I need,” Just the thought of it made her body clench in demand, Rey gasped, “ _I need you._ ”

She felt his muscles tense as he tried to control himself, “Are you sure?” He asked her again, then almost absentmindedly licked a line along her.

Rey whimpered, “Yes, yes… _please…_ ”

Once the word please let her lips he was moving, practically falling out of bed as he went to his bag and rifled through it.

Rey pulled her vest off and threw it on the floor; there was a possibility she was being stupid, but right now, she _really didn’t care._ Time was precious, either one of them, or both of them could have died over the last few days, and there was always the possibility that they may encounter more trouble on their journey home. And Rey knew somehow, that if they didn’t do this now, if they didn’t take this chance they had been given, she may come to regret it… and she _craved_ it, she craved him beneath her and inside her, even though she had no idea how it would really feel, she wanted that ultimate connection, their minds were already linked, their bodies should be too.

Kylo lay down next to her on his side, his muscles trembling slightly, “Rey,” her name was like a caress, “Are you sure? It may… well, it will probably hurt the first time,” he sounded nervous.

Rey suddenly felt awkward, “I want to… if you do that is.”

Kylo gave a little disbelieving laugh as he looked down her her, “ _Stars... Light!_ Of course I do, I just don’t want to rush you.”

Rey smiled up at him, slightly shyly, “I do,” she said simply, then hesitated before saying, “Though, I’m not sure how to start.”

Kylo lent down to kiss her, fingers ghosting over one of her breasts, _ <I think we can work it out.> _

Rey smiled against his lips and reached down to slide his boxers down his hips, he pulled away from her briefly to get them off completely, then went straight back to kissing her.

Rey trailed her fingers down till they touched him and he gasped against her as she wrapped her fingers around him. It still stunned her that it could be so hard and hot, yet the skin was like silk, almost delicate beneath her fingers.

One of his hands slid between her legs again, picking up where his mouth had left off and she moaned, feeling that ache, that urge for _more,_ rise up again.

_ <Do you have any… idea about what position you would prefer?> _Even his voice in her head sounded husky.

Rey shrugged slightly, _ <I have no idea.> _

_ <Do you mind if I go on top?> _ He asked, and the thought of that and his fingers sent her over that shining cliff.

There was a rustling sound and she realised that he was putting the condom on, her insides felt like they’d turned to liquid fire as he climbed over her, carefully keeping his weight off her as he gazed down at her.

The dawn light was enough now that she could see him, his dark hair in disarray, his pupils huge, surrounded by warm chocolate irises. His sinful lips red and bruised, his breathing already heavy.

~ Kylo looked down at Rey, her hair spread out in a halo on the pillow, slightly curled from finger combing and letting it dry naturally, the green in her wide hazel eyes seemed to shine, the orangey-brown more like gold. She was utterly beautiful, even as she unconsciously bit her pink lips, as her breath hitching slightly. He still wasn’t completely certain if he was dreaming or not.

He took a deep breath in, “You ready?”

~Rey smiled slightly and nodded, shifting her hips and moving her legs a little more apart as he settled between them. She drew in a sharp breath as she felt him rest against her, her heart started to beat faster in anticipation.

~Just the feel of that point of contact sent Kylo’s blood boiling inside his veins, everything in him yelled at him to thrust, it took almost everything he had not to give in to that desire, “Are you ready?” He hardly recognised his own voice, it had gone so deep, almost primitive.

~ Rey’s voice sounded breathless as she nodded, “Yes,” the end of the word turned to a hiss as Kylo pressed against her.

~Kylo immediately held still, he was incapable of making words right now, _ <Do you want me to stop?> _

~Rey firmly shook her head, then arched her hips up, pressing against him a little, his own breathed hissed and she could feel the iron control he had to exert over himself not to just thrust inside her.

~Kylo reached down and slid himself over her slick heat, using her come as lubricant. Rey seemed to like the feeling a lot, so he did it again, shuddering internally over how good it felt, how unbelievably hot she was. Then she made a little needy sound and canted her hips, her imperative clear. Pushing against her was a little easier this time, and he made it in an inch or so before he paused, she was panting slightly, nose scrunched up, obviously in pain.

~ _ <We can stop,> _ came Kylo’s voice in her head, but Rey shook hers. _ <I want this, I need this,> _she steadied her breathing, she had always been good at dealing with pain, at sealing it away, separating herself from it, but this was different. Kylo still seemed unsure, and she could feel it was killing him inside, so she rocked her hips a little against him, and he groaned, almost helplessly.

~Despite his now almost agonising need and Rey’s urging, Kylo continued cautiously, not able to bear the thought of hurting her too much. And, if he were honest with himself, it hurt him a little too; despite how wet she was, she was tight, painfully so, and yet, she felt incredible too, _right_ somehow.

~Gradually, Kylo pushed his way inside her, and the pain was sharp and wonderful at the same time, the further in he went, the more she felt their connection, the more the stars seemed to align, the more fate tethered them together.

~Once Kylo had made it in as far as he thought possible, he paused. They were both panting now, both trembling, he with the effort it took to hold himself still and she with pain and need.

Kylo groaned as Rey twitched her hips, he could feel her body holding onto him tightly, embracing him as her arms did. He leant down and kissed her, rather unsteadily, and started to move.

~Rey gasped against Kylo’s mouth as he moved. The feeling was at once alien and wonderful, agony and ecstasy, but all of it felt _right._

~It was getting slightly easier, her body was acclimatising, starting to welcome him, this joining seemed to transcend the bond, or it bound them closer, he wasn’t sure, his thoughts were barely coherent at this point, he was a wealth of sensation, and on top of his, were hers, it was almost like a pleasure feedback loop.

~Rey’s body seemed to be changing around him, altering, adapting to accept him, as if it knew he belonged here, within her. It was still painful, but Rey could feel something building, deep inside her, the intensity of what was growing was almost frightening.

~It was getting better and better, Kylo shifted slightly, really it was his body in control now, being directed by a primal knowledge he never knew he had. Rey gasped beneath him, then moved and somehow wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him deeper inside her and they both moaned, as if they were one mind and one body; which of course, they were.

~Power started crackling between them, it had been building in a steady hum, but mixed in all the other sensations it had been lost till now. The sparks lit the air, turning silver and gold, and their connection, their bond became pure light.

~The very air was humming, a portent of what was to follow.

~Kylo couldn’t hold on any longer, he broke, and his breaking caught Rey up and pulled her along with him.

~Their orgasm was so intense it was almost unbearable. The feel of it seared their bones, turned their muscles to liquid, their hearts beating in sync, beating as one. And they knew, that they were irrevocably bound, minds, bodies and souls. All were one.

 

~

 

~Kylo collapsed, just able to catch himself on his arms before he crushed Rey completely. When he finally able to think lucidly again, he realised with some horror that Rey was crying, tears were streaming from her eyes as she trembled. _ <Rey?> _

~ Kylo’s voice in her head, nervous and alarmed brough Rey back to herself, to some degree anyway. She smiled up at him, slightly tremulously, _ <Yes?> _

_ <Did I hurt you?> _ His voice was agonised in her head and she frowned slightly, _ <A bit, but it’s meant to, right?> _ Kylo’s breath shuddered out of him, _ <Then why are you crying?> _ Rey blinked up at him, _ <Am I?> _ she looked up at him carefully and touched his face gently, catching one of his tears so she could show him, _ <You are too.> _

~Kylo felt himself blush, _ <Oh, I didn’t realise.> _ He pulled out of her as gently as he could, even so he caught her wincing slightly. He lay down on his back and pulled her against him, still trying to calm his hammering heart and laboured breath.

“Are you okay?” He asked after a while.

~Rey nodded, “I think so… I wasn’t expecting… anything like that, though.”

Kylo shook his head, “Me neither. I think as soon as your legs are strong enough, you should take a shower, you may have bled and I don’t know how we would even begin to explain that to the lady who runs this place.”

Rey blushed, “In that case, maybe I should get up now,” she attempted to sit up, but it was a lot harder than it should be, her body didn’t seem able to respond just yet.

~Kylo chuckled, then tried to sit up himself and found it difficult too, he rolled onto his side slightly instead and lifted the tangled sheets off them, but was unable to make much out other than their legs.

So, with a surge of effort, he rolled off the side of the bed, then stood, tottering slightly, before reaching out for Rey.

~Rey took Kylo’s hand, letting him pull her to the edge of the bed, before he carefully scooped her up, and carried her into the bathroom, taking care not to jostle her too much or trip over his own awkward feet. He paused for a moment, suddenly arrested by the image of them in the mirror over the sink, she turned to look too, then blushed, ducking her eyes. It was adorable. Then he blushed too as he realised he still had the condom on him - it was not an attractive sight.

~Rey found herself giggling in response to Kylo’s sudden embarrassment, he huffed, then gently put her down in the shower cubicle, holding her steady as her legs wobbled, “Shower with me?” She asked, partly because she was sure she wouldn’t be able to stand for a while yet, but also because she couldn’t stand the idea of letting go of him just yet.

~Kylo smiled down at her, “Of course, just, hold on a second, I need to take this… off.” Rey nodded and to his relief, averted her eyes as he removed the condom. Now he looked at it in the light, there was some blood on it, but not an excessive amount.

He got into the shower and closed the door behind him, pulled Rey against him as he fiddled with the dial. They were both sweat covered, muscles aching in odd places and in new ways, the water hitting them was warm at best, but at least the pressure was better than last night. They both let it fall over their heads for a while before Kylo reached for the shower gel and started gently lathering Rey’s body.

~Rey made a small happy sound and turned in the circle of Kylo’s arms so she could reciprocate. A small part of her began to be turned on, but it was a very small part, for now, she was satiated, even a little sleepy.

Once they had washed everything off, Kylo switched the water off and opened the door, leaning out so he could grab towels. He wrapped her up in one, then dried himself as best he could in the small space, and pulled her into his arms again. “I can probably walk now,” Rey protested.

Kylo shrugged slightly, “I like my way better, love.”

Rey rested her head against his shoulder, nuzzling his neck slightly as he asked, “It’s almost 7am, back to bed for a bit? Wake up call isn’t till 8am.”   

~ Kylo felt Rey nod, the bond indicated she was sleepy. He gentle put her on top of the sheets, as he was fairly certain underneath them would be messy, then grabbed a couple more towels to use as extra covers.

He lay down beside her and she cuddled up to him, already half gone, and he wasn’t far behind her.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope that wasn’t too jumbled, and just in case you were worried, Rey is 16 (legal age of consent in UK)... also, I know I promised more Chewie, but then felt this chapter needed to be on its own, but Chewie POV next! ♥
> 
> Chapter title taken from the lyrics of Las Palabras De Amor by Queen
> 
> Songs in my head:
> 
> ~ Neutron Star Collision by Muse  
> ~ All Around Me by Flyleaf  
> ~ Primitive by Annie Lennox  
> ~ Energize Me by After Forever  
> ~ Radioactive by Imagine Dragons  
> ~ Driven By You by Queen


	85. Reactivated Tracking

Chewie was excited. His humans were excited too. They were still tense, but Han said the tracking chip had been reactivated, Chewie wasn’t sure what that meant apart from that they now knew where the pups were and they were going to find them. 

They had been driving ever since the little talking machine had told them where the pups would be. A man had met them at the plane, bringing a big car with him, which they had taken on their journey to the pups. They had left at night, as soon as the man had brought the car. 

Chewie was happy, it was not as hot as when the fire was in the sky, but he knew soon it would rise again because the sky was growing light.

One of the windows was down and he occasionally pushed his head through it, letting the wind rush through his fur.

Luke was holding the little machine in his hand, telling Han where they should go. Leia had tried sleeping but could not, so Chewie had been resting his head on her shoulder sometimes so she wasn’t sad and so she could give him chin rubs. Humans liked touching him, it helped them calm down. And he liked it too, but only special people, only his pack and sometimes their friends.

Chewie had known Rey-pup was pack the first time he had met her, she had smelled of belonging, of home; he felt the kinship despite never having met her before. Pack was the most important thing and he was very happy they would soon be together again. 

The day got hotter as the fire in the sky rose, Chewie was panting a lot and was grateful when Leia offered him some water. Sometimes Leia was cross but most of the time she was nice. Chewie wished Han and Leia would be mates again. Han was sad without her.

“We’re a few miles out,” Luke said, then hesitated before adding, “We should talk about what we are going to do when we find them.”

Han shrugged as his eyes stayed on the road, “We’ll make sure they’re all right, then I’ll kill Ben.” But Chewie knew Han did not mean it. 

“Do not forget that only the Knight’s know his real name and that you’re his parents,” Luke answered.

Chewie could feel Leia’s irritation as she sighed, “It will be probably for the best if we keep up appearances,” she cocked her head, then added, “Though I very much doubt Rey does not know by now.”

Luke nodded, “It seems likely… But what do we do once we have found them? I doubt you’ll leave the Falcon behind, Han.”

Han snorted, “ _ Of course not _ … I suppose you two can take the kids home on the plane and Chewie and I will drive the Falcon back.”

“We should probably decide on how we treat them, I mean, Rey isn’t at fault of course, she was kidnapped, _ but the boys... _ Well, a misdemeanor on this scale...” Luke trailed off and Leia shook her head.

“These are not misdemeanors, they’ve committed  _ crimes _ . They stole the Falcon, have probably stolen a different license plate…  _ and _ they have attacked people,  _ with weapons, _ probably  _ killing _ ... Criminals,  _ granted _ , but even so.”

Chewie rolled his eyes, Leia could be very silly. If Ben-pup had rescued Rey-pup, why did it matter how he had done it? He articulated this to Han, who gave him a lopsided smile and ruffled his ears. “I hear you buddy, but sometimes people can’t just go around doing what they want, especially not kids.”

Chewie huffed and rolled his eyes again - humans seemed to lose sight of what  _ mattered, _ their rules seldom seemed to make any sense to Chewie.

“Well, we didn’t contact the police about the Falcon being taken… I think it would be a bad idea for us to involve the authorities in any of this. The boys took a huge risk, they were rash and thoughtless, but it was done with good intentions. It wasn’t for personal gain, or revenge or anything like that… So I am not sure how we punish them… To be honest, I’m not even sure we should. Mara has said the police looking for Rey haven’t really seemed to be making any progress. It is possible they never would have found her.”

Leia shivered despite the heat that thickened the air, “I would  _ not _ have abandoned her, we would have found her somehow.”

“Perhaps, but by the time we did, it may have been too late. She is a remarkable young lady and has survived an incredible amount, but you know what the Far South is like. She was lucky with Unkar,” Leia made an outraged noise but Luke carried on over it, “She  _ was _ Leia, most girls her age would have been…  _ used _ ; as pleasure slaves or sold as wives.”

Leia turned to gaze out of the window, looking a little sick, “We cannot really punish them then, can we? It wouldn’t be right. Despite all the things they have done…” Her voice was full of sadness and Chewie rested his head on her shoulder again, huffing in her ear, it made her smile a little.

“That said, we certainly shouldn’t tell them they’ve done a good job either,” Han said dryly, “And Ben and I _ will _ be having private words about taking the Falcon.”

Leia snorted, “You and  _ that van _ !” Her tone was exasperated, but Chewie could tell she was hiding a smile.

“Perhaps,” Luke said thoughtfully, “If we could make a deal with the boys, no punishments for their agreement to keep the details of their absence from their parents? It was lucky we were able to convince Snoke to let us try finding them before alerting anyone to their absence… We could possibly couch it as a school trip, maybe to take in Southern culture? Or to learn survival skills?”

A wave of familiarity wafted through the air and Chewie stopped listening to their conversation to cock his head,  _ he could smell _ … he hurriedly shoved his head out of the window-  _ he could smell the pups! _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The wake up call was  _ brutal.  _ Kylo burrowed his head under his pillows, trying to block it out. He felt the mattress move as Rey got up to turn it off…  _ Rey _ …

Kylo couldn’t stop his lips stretching in a huge grin as he shifted, propping up his head to look for her. She was still naked, bare skin bathed in the light that filtered through the curtains, walking carefully as she made her way back to the bed. Her cheeks flushed as she met his eyes, lips curving up slightly.

“Good morning,” Kylo purred, voice gravelly with sleep and satisfaction. 

“Hey,” her voice was pretty husky too.

He made a disappointed sound as she pulled a towel against herself, then launched himself at her, pulling it away and throwing on the floor as he took her in his arms, kissing her thoroughly.

To his amusement, this made her giggle.

“Kylo! You need to get up!” She half gasped, half laughed, wriggling against him. He had been horny before, and this just made it worse.

He moved his lips away from hers and latched onto a breast, her back arched and he stroked a hand down her stomach to between her legs.

He felt her wince and he pulled away, suddenly feeling selfish, “Sorry, I didn’t ask how you are feeling after…?”

Her cheeks were flushed but she gave him a small smile, “Sore, but okay… maybe no quite ready to do anything else quite yet though…” she grimaced, “I don’t know if I want to sit a speeder today either.”

Kylo chuckled, “We’ll work something out.”

Rey nodded, then pushed him towards the side of the bed, “You need to go and get breakfast, and bring me something back too, I could eat a camel right now.”

Kylo groaned in protest and she pushed him harder, he huffed a long suffering, “Okay, okay. I’m getting up.”

He shook his hair out of his eyes and got to his feet; at least he wasn’t one of the drivers, there was that… Plus,  _ last night had happened,  _ his grin reasserted itself as he went about the room searching for his clothes.

He was distracted by Rey as she walked into the bathroom to find her underwear… then there was a knock at the door and he hurriedly pulled his boxers on as Rey squeaked and shut the bathroom door with a bang.

Ingalan raised his eyebrows as Kylo opened the door, “You joining us?”

Kylo nodded, “I’ll be out in a moment, hold on.”

Normally he would have invited the Knights in, but this really wasn’t a good time to do that. He quickly pulled a vest and camo trousers on, shoved his feet into his boots and ran his hands through his impossibly messy hair, “I’ll bring you back something,” he called to the bathroom door, then joined the others outside. 

They took in his dishevelled state and Zainmar raised his eyebrows, “You look like you’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards.”

Kylo snorted, “Thanks. Let’s go get food.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey grimaced as she put back on the barely there underwear she had been given in Tatooine. It was better than nothing, but not by much.

Her body ached, inside as well as out, and there really was no way she was sitting on a speeder... But she had no idea how she was going to explain that to the others.

_ And _ she was very hungry. To distract herself, once she was dressed, she tided up Kylo’s things, packing them into his bag, then straightened the room as best she could. There wasn’t much she could do about the mess on the bed sheets, she did her best though, then carefully made the bed.

Onced that was done, there was nothing left to do but pull her hair through Finn’s smashball cap and lace her boots. She cautiously poked her head out of the door to see there was no one around, and as their room was the farthest from the rest of the buildings, she risked going outside and sitting on the porch.

The sun was already hot on her skin and she pushed the sleeves of her baggy green t-shirt up over her shoulders, shutting her eyes as she soaked up the rays.

_ Something _ began to tickle at the edges of her senses.  _ Something _ was drawing nearer… but it was not the prickling that warned of danger or ill intent, it was nothing sinister.

Rey frowned and opened her eyes, her ears picking up the distant sound of an engine, coming closer.

_ <Kylo? Do you feel that too?> _

There was a pause, then,  _ <I feel something, but it doesn’t feel wrong… I’m almost done eating, I’ll be out soon.> _

Rey unclipped her knife sheath and checked her handgun, then moved cautiously along the porch and into the bushes that lined the edge of the car park area.

There still was no sense of warning, but she pulled a small throwing knife out of her boot anyway.

Soon a people carrier was pulling into the car park… and it had Chewie leaning out of one of the open windows.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey-pup! Chewie impatiently clawed at the car door, pulling the lever that made it open, then launched himself out, even before the car has stopped.

Rey-pup stood up from where she had been hiding in the bushes and Chewie hurled himself at her.

They went down in a tangle and once Chewie righted himself he set about licking Rey-pups face as she laughed beneath him. He was very pleased to see her, though strangely, she smelled very strongly of Ben-pup…  _ Oh. _ They had mated. Chewie grinned down at her.

“Chewie, get off you lummox, let the poor girl up,” Han said as he walked up to them.

Chewie huffed but did as he was asked and Han held out a hand to help Rey-pup up. Rey-pup suddenly smelled nervous, but she took the proffered hand and stood, brushing her clothes down, “How are you here?” 

Han’s smile fell a little, “We came to find you and the boys... You okay kiddo?”

Rey gave him a little self-conscious shrug, her scent became guilty as she replied, “Yeah I’m okay… Sorry.” Chewie shoved his nose into her hand, rubbing his head against her hip. 

Han frowned, “Nothing to apologise for… Let’s go find the boys.”

Rey nodded and they turned to walk towards the entrance of the building they had parked by, Chewie ran ahead of them, excited to see Ben-pup again too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

They had just been leaving the dining room when Kylo heard his mother’s voice. He stopped dead in his tracks and Zainmar walked into his back. “Bloody ashes Kylo, some warning next time you randomly stop, please?”

Kylo ignored him, too stunned to reply as Luke appeared in the doorway. 

Luke gave them a small smile as he took in their shocked faces, “Glad we caught you lads, you’ve been hard to track down.”

“Master Luke,” Poe said faintly, “What are you doing here?”

Luke raised an eyebrow, “We came to take you back to school, of course,” then he turned and walked back into the reception area.

After a moment, they all followed him, “How are we going to explain the bounty?” Ingalan whispered.

Kylo frowned, it was a good question, because if they told them about the bounty, they’d have to admit to killing people…  _ and _ they were currently all carrying guns.  _ Fuck. _ In all of their planning and talks, they’d never once considered people from home come after them… in hindsight, that was a  _ stupid _ oversight. 

He had a few seconds to register Leia talking with Dama as if they were old friends, before Chewie bowled into him.

Kylo would have gone down if the others were not closely packed behind him, “Chewie! Get down, you furry idiot!” Chewie dropped back onto all fours and lovingly licked his hand, grinning up at him.

There was muttered swearing coming from everyone behind Kylo and he moved forward to give the others room to right themselves. 

The Knights of course, were fine with Chewie, Poe and Finn were used to him a little from all the time Chewie had stayed with Rey recently, but Hux… Kylo hid  a smirk, Hux’s face was white and pinched and he kept to the back, avoiding Chewie at all costs.

Kylo’s attention shifted as Han and Rey entered the reception area, in all the surprise, Kylo hadn’t thought to communicate to Rey that Luke and Leia were here… Though  he should have known his father would be here too.

_ <You okay?> _

_ <Yeah… just surprised… what happens now?> _ Rey sounded nervous, before he could reply Dama noticed them and beamed at Han.

“Han! How lovely to see you again!” Dama’s eyes shifted to Rey and they widened, “And who is this… young lady?” A wave of embarrassment overwhelmed the bond and Kylo grinned.

Han gave Dama a smile as he walked towards her, “Good to see you too, Dama. This is Rey,” he indicated to where Rey was trying to sink into the floor, “When did you move from Tatooine?”

Dama grimaced, “Ah, about ten years now, it went downhill the more time Jabba Desilijic Tiure spent there. It was a wrench to leave the Inn, but Keesa and I have settled here now, it’s nice to be away from the racketeering, it was getting worse every month by the end.”

As they spoke, Leia had moved away and stepped up to Rey. If anything, Rey became more embarrassed, then Leia drew her with her to approach he and the others, who were still paused in the dining room doorway.

“I am glad to see that you are all in one piece,” Leia said as she studied them, everyone shifted their feet awkwardly under her steady, assessing gaze, “We will be taking you back to school.”

No one replied, all at a loss at how to respond.

_ <They need to know about the bounty, of this will go south quickly,> _ Rey sent and Kylo accidently nodded slightly, then grimaced as Leia’s eyes caught the movement.

He cleared his throat, then said awkwardly, “You should know, err, there is a… bounty out on us.”

Leia’s expression never changed, “Yes, we are aware of that. We have a plane we can take, though it’s about a twelve hour drive to get there. Go and gather your things.” 

It wasn’t until she arched an eyebrow at them that they started moving, streaming around her and out of the reception area, still all confused somewhat.

Kylo glanced back to see that Leia had reached out a hand to Rey’s arm, keeping her behind.

_ <Are you okay?> _ he sent as he paused behind the others.

_ <Yeah, go and get your stuff, I’ll be fine> _ she replied, her feelings a snarl of embarrassment, discomfort and surprise.

_ <I’ll be quick,> _ he assured her as he trotted back to his room, Chewie joining him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“I cannot believe that is your son,” Dama said as she came and stood with Rey and Leia.

Rey didn’t blink and Leia gave her a little nod, before replying.

“I can hardly believe it myself, sometimes,” she said with a smile.

“I thought he looked familiar when they arrived,” Dama said, then smiled at Rey, “So you are Jabba’s escaped slave then?”

Rey’s hand went straight to her draw her gun but she looked up as Luke’s hand caught hers, “It is okay, Rey. Dama is an old friend. She will not betray you.”

Dama’s eyes went wide, “Oh, goodness no! But, I think if you are going near Nal Hutta, we need to improve on your disguise. I take it you were the boy the others said was ill?”

Rey nodded, still eyeing Dama warily but keeping her hands loose at her sides.

Leia regarded Rey then nodded, “What can you do?” She asked Dama.

Dama gave her a crafty smile, “Come with me,” she said, and gestured to Leia to follow.

Leia pulled Rey along with her as she said, “Luke, you and the boys will need to wait a while.”

Dama talked over her shoulder as they followed her up past the dining room and into what were clearly her living quarters. “I had to help a Mirialan friend a few months back, she had a Hutt problem too. I kept hold of her clothes, Mirial is in the North, so I don’t think Rey will look out of place with you if we change her hair colour and I can paint some temporary tattoos on her face. Forgive me dear,” here she looked at Rey, “But if anyone really looks at you, it is obvious you are not a boy.”

_ <I’m getting a disguise,> _ Rey sent to Kylo. She wasn’t entirely happy about it, but if they were stopped… well, Dama was right, she didn’t look like a boy.  _ <I’ll be a little while, maybe try and find out what Luke and Han know? I’m afraid Luke’s already seen my gun, though he didn’t try and take it away.> _

_ <Okay, will see what I can find out. But at least it looks like we’ll get out of here easier than we expected,> _ Kylo sent,  _ <Thanks for sorting the room out… It’s going to be awkward if Dama checks the bed before we leave though.> _

Rey’s stomach sank into her boots.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

At first, Kylo expected Luke and Han to insist the he and the others hand over their weapons, but to his surprise, they did not.

They didn’t say much as they waited for Leia and Rey. Once they had retrieved their things from their rooms, they had returned to the dining room to wait. Everyone was quiet, still unsure how to behave in this strange situation.

After a little while, Han looked at him and said gruffly, “Kylo, I want to go and look the Falcon over. Come with me and bring the keys.”

Kylo swallowed and stood, then held out his hand to Hux, “Keys?” Hux handed them over, expression carefully blank, and Kylo followed Han outside while Luke stayed with the others.

Once they were out of sight of the dining room, Kylo was even more surprised when Han stopped and roughly pulled Kylo against him in a brief hug.

“Good to see you, Ben…  _ But  _ do not ever do that to us again, you hear? And the Falcon better be in good condition or you’ll be working all your free time on repairing it.”

“We were shot at quite a bit,” Kylo said admitted, “But I haven’t had a good look at it. We kept the number plate though.”

Han nodded, “I should think so, it was a smart move to change it… But what I very much want to know is, where the hell did you lot get your weapons?”

Kylo grimaced, “Hux. He had an army contact and we picked up supplies in Oslumpex.”

Han’s eyebrows almost disappeared into his hairline, then he frowned, “That is another thing I, well,  _ we _ , would like to know - what in the name of the  _ light  _ is that shithead  _ doing _ here?”

Kylo shrugged unhappily, “Shortly before we left school Hux came up to my room. He told us he knew we were going to get Rey, told us he wanted to go with us and could get weapons and as many credits as we needed…” Kylo ran his hands through his hair, “I don’t know, but if we hadn’t have taken him with us, he may have dobbed us in, or sabotaged us somehow… I knew.. I  _ knew _ the police wouldn’t make finding Rey a priority and I’m sorry, but I couldn’t just sit around and wait. And I don’t regret it. Not at all. I don’t think any of us do.”

Han nodded, brows drawn down as he paused to look at Kylo, “But why is Hux here? After everything he put Rey through?”

Kylo shook his head, “He won’t explain. Just refuses to.”

Han grunted, then took the keys from Kylo’s hand and  started walking around the Falcon, “To be honest, it doesn’t look to bad,” he said gruffy, as he rejoined Kylo where he had been nervously waiting.    
Han opened up the back, then chuckled, “In fact, it looked a damn sight tidier than I remember.”

Kylo smiled, “We had to lose a lot of stuff before going through a stop and search roadblock when we were in Far Pando,” he gestured to the speeders, “That’s when we picked up the bikes, so we could split up as the bounty mentioned our number.”

Han looked at him, “And where,” he asked carefully, “Did you get the bikes?”

Kylo flickered his eyes away and shifted his feet, “Rey… got hold of them.”

_ “Ah _ , she did, did she? I think perhaps we willl leave them here. Just in case they’ve been reported… missing.” Han looked at Kylo then, and gave him a grin, “We met with Unkar Plutt, the man who owned Rey.”

Kylo looked at him with interest, “Did you go to Jakku first then? What was it like?”

Han nodded, “Yeah. It was an utter shit hole, don’t tell your friends this, but I may have shot Unkar in the hand.”

Kylo’s eyes almost fell out of his head at that and Han chuckled, “It was the least I could do.” He shook his head, “Something needs to be done about how they treat orphans down there, it ain’t right.”

Kylo could only nod in agreement. They chatted about a few other things, then rejoined the others in the dining room.

The bond was full of irritation but Rey remained quiet and Kylo let her have space figuring she was probably having to already concentrate on keeping a lid on her temper - this must be reminding her of being dressed back in Tatooine.

When Rey emerged, he almost didn’t recognise her, which he supposed was the point. Her hair was now black and had been cut shorter, just shy of her shoulders, and it had been straightened and left down. Her eyes were heavily lined in black and her lips were painted in a matt colour with a brownish hint to it, above and between her eyebrows were four black diamond shapes, themselves arranged in a diamond pattern, they looked like a tattoo or strange beauty marks.

The makeup and hair colour changed her features a surprising amount, added to that she was wearing a long flowing black skirt, a dark red silk vest top and a crocheted loose black shrug.

Chewie trotted over to them but Leia gave him a look, “Not now, Chewie.” Chewie huffed but stopped, and Leia looked at everyone else, “Right then, if you are all ready, we should get going.” It was said as if the men had been the ones delaying them leaving, Kylo heard Han snort softly behind him.

“Armitage, Poe, Finn, Ingalan and Zainmar, you’ll ride with Master Luke, the rest of you will come with me,” Leia instructed then gestured to the door, “Off you go then.”

They started moving and Rey quickly joined Kylo, his hand automatically finding hers as they walked out of the dining room, leaving Leia talking to Dama.

_ <What about the speeders?> _ Rey asked.

Kylo noted she was not mentioning her change in appearance and decided he probably should follow her example, the bond was crackling now with irritation,  _ <We leave them behind. We’ll be in two separate cars, with three adults and a dog. I think that is sufficiently different without adding the speeders, which may have been reported stolen by now anyway.> _

Rey nodded minutely,  _ <Probably for the best… Now I won’t have to explain why I’d rather not ride today.> _

Kylo grinned, then immediately tempered it as he noticed Hux watching them out of the corner of his eye.

As they prepared to get into the Falcon and people carrier, Finn caught Rey up in a hug, “You look great, Peanut.  _ Weird _ but great, I almost didn’t recognise you.”

Rey returned his hug with a pained look on her face, “Thanks,” she muttered and Finn laughed, giving her one last affectionate squeeze before getting into the car. 

Chewie was loaded into the back of the Falcon, which he was not especially pleased about, grumbling a whine as Han shut the door on him, and Leia gestured for Kylo and Rey to join her on the back seats.

Kylo looked at Rey, swallowed, then got in. This was probably going to be an uncomfortable journey.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This chapter was brought to you by a lot of wine and ineffectual sleeping tablets… and a stupid amount of nicotine. It was interrupted by a migraine and then a mild seizure. FML.  
> In case you were wondering (you probably weren't) Rey’s lipstick: LÓreal MATTE LIPSTICK 654 BRONZE SAUTOIR
> 
> Thanks to Akashne for helping me sort through some ideas for this chapter ♥


	86. Some Truths And Some Lies

 

_ <Shouldn’t one of us go in the other car so we can communicate if we need to?> _ Rey sent to Kylo as he slid along the seats so she could get in the Falcon.

He shrugged slightly, _ <Guess they have phones, everyone still has their ear comms on them if anything happens, but I think this is fine… and don’t think you are leaving me alone with my mother, that would be really mean.> _

Rey sent him an eye roll as she sat down next to him, but otherwise didn’t respond.

Silence reigned as the Falcon left the Sidi Driss Inn and followed the small winding sideroad that would take them back to the main one.

_ <Shit, I forgot to get you anything for breakfast! Shall I get Han to stop somewhere?> _

Rey snorted softly, _ <I couldn’t eat anything now, it would just come back up. I’ll be fine without.> _

That Kylo’s parents had arrived just hours after they had… _done the deed_ , made her really, really uncomfortable. Talk about awkward timing… Everytime she caught Leia’s eyes she felt sure that Leia _knew_ somehow… then of course there was the fact that they were with them to at all.

Neither Rey, nor the others had thought or discussed what they would say or do once they had got back to Canto Bight. They had had much more pressing things to concern themselves with, like escaping and not dying.

Granted, this meant getting home would be a walk in the park compared to what it could have been, but Rey had no idea what to expect or how to behave in this situation. At least none of the others seemed to know either, she wasn’t alone.

But, she felt responsible; she had been _stupid_ , in letting herself get taken and she was disgusted by her inability to escape the Fett’s on her own. The boys seemed okay now, but they had been running on adrenaline and excitement and Rey was fairly certain that once that wore off, it would hit them like a tonne of bricks. _And it was all her fault…_

Kylo’s grip almost crushed the bones in her hand as he turned to glare at her, _ <You are being ridiculous! _ **_You didn’t have a choice_ ** _. But we_ **_chose_ ** _to come after you. This was our choice. I doubt Hux cares he may have killed people - he isn’t really human, but if given the chance to do this again, I don’t think anyone of the others would back out, Rey. I mean it. Stop beating yourself up. > _

Rey really had no idea how to respond to that, she wiggled her fingers slightly and Kylo let up on the pressure on her hand, but he still kept a firm hold of it. She sighed and looked out of the window, the whole thing was was done and in the dust anyway, there really was nothing she could do about it now… She grimaced at her reflection, for a second she’d thought it was someone else.

Leia’s voice pulled her attention away before she could study her appearance properly, “While we understand why you did what you did, your actions were reckless and foolish and this adventure of yours could have ended up very differently. You were all very, _very lucky,_ ” she paused to fix each of the boys with a stern glare before carrying on and Rey wondered if Luke was giving the same lecture to the others, “You have committed several crimes, some extremely serious in nature, _and_ you have angered a prominent crime lord!”

Leia paused again while everyone, even Han, shifted uncomfortably in their seats, Chewie let out a whine-growl from the back and Rey was fairly certain Han coughed to cover a sudden laugh.

Kylo’s hand was gripping Rey’s tightly again and the bond was awash with irritation and indignation. He kept a lid on it though, which surprised Rey.

“You could have been seriously wounded, have life changing injuries, or even been killed! _Or,_ you could have been made a slave, spent the rest of your life being treated like an animal… Quite frankly it’s remarkable you are all still alive and uninjured. But that is nothing to feel smug about, it was luck, pure and simple.”

_ <Do we tell her there were injuries but we healed them?> _Rey sent.

Kylo’s eye’s flickered to her briefly, _ <No. It will only make her happy that she was right.> _

“Nevertheless, you will go without punishment,” at that Rey’s eyes, along with the other’s grew wide and glued themselves to Leia, “If you agree to keep the nature of your trip, from anyone at school and from your parents. This will mean you won’t get any criminal records, which would impact you for the rest of your lives. Any details of your time away must not be disclosed to _anyone._ But you will all be required to attend counselling sessions for as long as I deem necessary.”

Rey was amused to realise she and Kylo grimaced at the same time, _ <It’s better than having detention for the rest of the year> _ Rey sent and Kylo’s mouth twitched slightly.

_ <That depends on how many sessions she ‘deems necessary’, more than five and I will happily take the year of detention instead.> _

“And Ben will be helping me with fixing the Falcon up, too,” Han added, voice gruff yet there was a smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth.

Kylo glared at Han, and Rey smiled, _ <I could help? Make it go faster?> _

Kylo smiled slightly, face softening as he looked at her, _ <You just want to tinker with the Falcon. Admit it.> _

Rey grinned, _ <I have no problem admitting it.> _

_ <Beautiful weirdo,> _ he answered as he pulled her against him, wrapping his arm around her.

Rey just rolled her eyes.

 

A while later she reached out to take a water bottle from Leonmar when Leia’s hand touched the scar one of the Fett’s had given her.

Leia frowned, “This is a new one, what happened?”

_How the hell did she know it was new?_ It was scarred over nicely, rather than being scabbed or the shiny pink of a newly healing cut.

Rey shrugged uncomfortably as she withdrew her arm from Leia’s light touch, only to have it engulfed firmly as Kylo’s hands wrapped around it.

“Who did this?” He growled, ignoring his mother to glare at Rey.

Rey gave him as bland an expression as she could as she felt his anger colouring the bond, “It’s just a scratch. It’s fine.”

Leia pursed her lips, “That is more than a scratch, Rey.”

Leonmar snorted a laugh, “Compared to the knife in the gut she got, it is.” Rey, Kylo and Javiell turned to glare at him and he seemed to realise that he had said too much, as he muttered “Shit,” under his breath.

Leia folded her arms and fixed them all with a stern stare again, “Perhaps, it is time for you to tell us what happened while you were away. And I want the truth. _All of it.”_

_ <Edit. Leave out anything really bad or anything about the dreams and the Yoda guy.> _

Leia’s eyes caught Kylo’s as they flickered towards Rey’s and she somehow managed to appear sterner, “Talking will be done out loud, please, you two. And just in case you decide to leave anything out, Luke and I will be comparing notes later.”

_ <Well shit,> _ Kylo sent.

_ <Yup. But you should be able to leave out dreams and Yoda still.> _ Perhaps this was why Rey and Kylo had been kept together, if they had been separated they would have known what was disclosed and what wasn’t, and been able to pass it on.

Rey listened as they boys told their end; at least she wouldn’t have to try and match someone else’s story as she had been alone for most of her journey, and there were some things no one needed to know, even Kylo, or _especially Kylo._

The boys did quite well, they downplayed the attack and rescue, though they did admit their injuries and that Kylo and Rey had healed everyone. Leia had looked furious at that but had remained silent as she listened.

Once they were done, she was quiet for a few moments before she said, “I understand why you healed everyone, but I wish that you had not. Now Hux knows of your abilities, and it even seems like he knew of others before you healed him. I will speak to him privately later and hopefully I can impress upon him the need to stay silent… Very well. Rey, please tell us your half.”

Rey sighed inwardly, and proceeded to do as asked, though she left quite a lot of things out. She wasn’t certain how much the other boys knew - how much Kylo had passed on, but she hoped those with Luke would leave her side of things out of their narrative. Of course she had to include the two knife wounds, but she passed the arm wound off as one she’d received during the escape along with the other.

As she had had no control over which route she took on her journey with the Fett’s or much interaction, her story was concluded much quicker than the boys.

She was unsure if she had fooled Leia, but once she was done, in a very careful tone Kylo sent, _ <I know that wound on your arm wasn’t done during the rescue.> _

“It sounds as though the boys arrived just in time,” Leia said and Rey nodded. “Next time you do not sleep at all, you really should take a sick day,” Leia finished with a small smile. Rey returned it and took mouthful of water.

_ <Please tell me how it really happened.> _

Rey felt her heart clench as Kylo’s end of the bond was fraught with distress, _ <It was one of the Fett’s, on the journey down. I found it healed after I woke up from our dream with Snoke and the broken lightsabre.> _She really hoped he’d leave it there, but she knew that was unlikely...

And she was right, _ <Why did he do it? Do you know which one?> _

Rey almost laughed, _ <No, they wore the same clothes, it was difficult to tell them apart… I am uncertain why it was done,> _ and that was true, she only _suspected_ why it had been done.

There was a pause and she drank more water, her loose hair was annoying her and making her hot, though at least the top and skirt were pleasantly cool, even if the skirt was irritating.

Kylo was keeping his emotions contained, muting her out to a degree, and Rey found herself wishing Chewie was up the front with them, there was a whine from the back as if he had understood her thoughts and she smiled, he really was a lovely creature.

_ <So there was no warning? It wasn’t a punishment?> _

Rey sighed, _ <Not for anything I could work out, no.> _

Kylo’s hand reached for her arm so he could run his thumb over the scar, the action mirrored what one of the twins had done when he’d discovered it healed and she had to draw her arm away from Kylo’s fingers as nausea swelled up inside her.

_ <Are you okay?> _ Kylo’s sending was concerned and a little hurt.

Rey took another sip of water, _ <Yeah, sorry… It’s just, that’s what one of the twins did.> _

She felt anger spike in him, but he gently put an arm around her and she rested her head against him. _Light,_ she was tired.

“Go to sleep,” he murmured softly into her hair, “You’re safe and I’ve got you.”

Rey felt like she should protest, but it was as if his words were a trigger, her eyes slid shut and she surrendered to her exhaustion.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Is she alright?” Leia asked softly as Rey fell asleep almost immediately after resting her head against him.

“Yeah, she’s just worn out,” Kylo answered equally softly.

“I can see you are too, Ben, go to sleep.”

Kylo rolled his eyes at her use of his old name and shook his head, “I’m fine for now,” he lied. He wanted to watch over Rey till they were safely on the plane, something was tugging distantly on his awareness and he didn’t want to be caught by surprise again. The arrival of his family wasn’t bad, per se, but they’d barely had any warning and he wanted to be stay on alert in case anything else slipped through.

Leia tutted at him but didn’t suggest it again. A bit later she asked “When we were in Jakku on Tuesday, Luke and I were both floored briefly by a wave of power, it carried yours and Rey’s signatures in it, do you know what that was?”

Kylo frowned as he tried to work out what day of the week it was, everything in his memory had become rather jumbled, “What time of day?”

“Perhaps lunch time or just after,” Leia said, “The day before yesterday,” she added helpfully.

“Ooooh,” Kylo said, as he realised what that must of been, “Rey and I got…” he trailed off as he realised neither of them had mentioned the separation of their powers.

Leia raised her eyebrow, “Got what exactly?”

_Oh blood and bloody ashes_ , “We became able to use our abilities separately.”

Kylo had a moment of satisfaction as he watched his mother’s eyebrows climb into her hairline in surprise, “You can use them without touching each other?” Kylo nodded. “Do you know what caused the division?”

Kylo hesitated, but there didn’t seem to be any obvious reasons why he shouldn’t tell her, “We had a shared dream, at the end of it, we both tried to grab hold of a sword using our abilities and the force of it broke the sword in two and it exploded, when we woke up, we could use them independently.”

Leia was silent for a long time before saying, “A shared dream? This had happened before?”

Kylo nodded, “A few times,” he lowered his voice further, “Do you and Luke get them? Or do you know if grandfather did?”

Leia shook her head slowly, “I don’t know about my father, but Luke and I have not, as far as I know - I take it you are always aware of them being different after waking?”

“Yeah, I think you’d remember if you had,” Kylo wondered if he ought to tell her about their meeting with Yoda and the fact that the strange consciousness seemed to know about their family, but he decided to wait till Rey was awake so they could discuss it together.

“Luke’s heading into a Onestop, so if anyone needs to use the loo and stretch their legs, the time is now,” Han said from the front.

Kylo didn’t want to wake Rey, but she had chugged quite a lot of water and the Onestop may have something she could eat if she was up to it yet. He hated it when she skipped meals.

He stroked her cheek as he gently shook her, she came awake with a gasp and sat up abruptly. He could see it took her a few seconds to remember where she was and the look of quiet relief on her face made his hands itch. Those Fett’s had a lot to answer for, as did Jabba and pretty much everyone who lived in the accursed South… and whoever the fuck had orchestrated Rey’s abduction in the first place.

Her fingers lacing with his soothed his sudden fury, and he focused back on her, “We’re stopping for a rest break, think you can eat something?”

“Maybe, but I’d kill for some tea,” she smiled as she said it.

“Come along with me then, Rey and we’ll see what we can find,” Leia said as the Falcon came to a stop, she looked at Kylo as he frowned, “Rey accompanied by a woman rather than a young man or young men, will garner less attention. Don’t forget the bounty, Ben.”

Kylo glared at her, “And don’t forget, my name, is Kylo Ren.”

Leia looked unimpressed as she got out of the Falcon after him, “It is so nice to see you wearing something other than black, _Kylo_ ,” she told him serenely as she glided away towards the shop, Rey in tow.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, many apologies are in order:  
> 1\. I am sorry this is short.  
> 2\. Sorry it’s probably messy as hell.  
> 3\. My absence, the seizure turned into something else and I haven’t been able to write.  
> So, in conclusion, sorry, sorry and sorry.  
> It may be a while till I’m up to full speed. Thank you so much for making it this far, I love you guys ♥


	87. They Tried To Break Us, Looks Like They’ll Try Again

The Onestop had fresh tea. Real, fresh desert tea. Rey’s toes curled in her boots as she happily inhaled the smell from the steaming cardboard cup. It had been properly brewed in a huge metal kettle, and was thick and strong and syrupy sweet.

“Fellow desert rat?” The man behind the counter asked as he studied Rey while Leia was off choosing sandwiches. Rey nodded silently, not really paying much attention to him. “What you doing with a load of Northerners?” He asked, he was fishing, and Rey realised his voice sounded almost  _ too  _ casual.

She focused on him, gently brushing his mind… he thought she looked familiar and was trying to work out why.

There was no one near them, and she used to Force, “You do not recognise me. You will forget that any of us were here.”

He repeated it back to her, eyes slightly vacant, she nodded to herself and left the Onestop to stand outside and wait for Leia as she savoured the tea.

_ <Are you okay?> _ Kylo sent.

_ <Fine. Was almost recognised but made them forget we were here. I think I’m getting better at it.> _ Kylo’s alarm reached her,  _ <It’s all right,> _ she quickly reassured him, _ <No one was near enough to hear.> _

_ <Okay, but maybe you should go and wait inside the Falcon, if he almost did, someone else could.> _

Rey sighed, at least she had supersized the tea,  _ <Okay.> _

“What have you got?” Poe asked her as she reached the Falcon and Luke’s people carrier.

Rey smiled, “ _ Real  _ tea. Want to try it?”

Poe shook his head smiling, “That one time was enough, thanks.”

Rey shook her head, “That wasn’t made properly, this is.”

Finn sniffed the cup doubtfully, then grimaced, “Nope. We will stick to coffee… Or at least, at home we will. I don’t know how you can drink that in this heat.”

Rey shrugged and smiled, echoing the Onestop cashier, “Desert rat.”

“ _ My _ desert rat,” Kylo purred as his hands slipped around her waist from behind, “But seriously, that does smell vile.”

Rey snorted, “Don’t dis my tea, and your coffee smells  _ and _ tastes vile.”

As Kylo chuckled, a faint prickle ran up Rey’s spine, but Chewie chose that moment to sidle up to them and lovingly rub his head on Rey’s hip, leaving golden, tawny fur on the black skirt.

“Leia is going to kill you for that, Chewie,” Kylo told the dog, who just grinned at them, then sneezed.

Everyone turned as the sound of running footsteps came towards them and a speeder loudly high tailed it out of the car park.

Javiell raised his voice but didn’t quite shout as he reached them, “Get in, we have to leave! Someone just took a picture of Rey on their phone, I couldn’t reach them and they got away.”

Kylo’s hands briefly gripped Rey hard as he pushed her at the Falcon, “I’ll go and get Leia, find the others, we need to go, now!” He let go and ran for the shop.

Everyone was still strapping in as they sped away from the Onestop and back on to the main road.

“Javiell, what happened?” Leia asked as Han put his foot down.

“There was a man, he looked similar to Hutt’s guards, he was lurking off to the side, at first I thought he just wanted to stay out of the sun and was checking his phone, but then I realised he was taking pictures of the Falcon, and Rey and the others… I threw a knife at him, but only got him in the shoulder and he jumped on his bike and gunned it.”

“ _ You threw a knife at him? _ ” Leia’s voice lost it’s usual composure, “Why would you  _ do _ such a thing?”

Javiell shrugged, “Shooting him would have made too much noise,” Rey decided she rather liked Javiell. Leia made an outraged noise, then took in a deep, calming breath, Javeill added, “What was I meant to do? Just let him go?”

Leia opened her mouth, then closed it, seemingly lost and searching for the right words.

“Either way, it doesn’t matter, because he did get away,” Han said, though not unkindly, “It was good you saw him do it, Jav, at least now we know.”

Rey frowned, “But how did he recognise me? I barely recognise myself!”

“He may have just recognised the Falcon, saw us, saw you were the only girl there, and made an educated guess,” Kylo said unhappily.

Han nodded, “Yeah. Either way, we need to have more distance between us and Luke. And we shouldn’t stop at the same places either.”

“Wouldn’t it be better if I went with Luke? If they stop the Falcon and find I’m not here, they may think they are mistaken?” 

“I will call Luke now, Han, take the next sideroad,” Leia ordered, calm and in control again.

 

They did a quick and complete swap, rather than argue about who went where, Chewie stayed with Han in the Falcon and Hux, Poe, Finn, Zainmar and Ingalan joined them, whilst Rey, Kylo, Leonmar, Javiell and Leia joined Luke in the people carrier.

The people carrier went first and Han followed ten minutes after them, keeping the distance between the two vehicles, and they put their ear comms in, just in case.

The people carrier was a lot warmer than the falcon, and Rey found herself sandwiched between Kylo and Leonmar.

For the first hour, everyone was too tense to talk or relax and Kylo’s hot hand held onto hers tightly.

Once the next hour had passed without incident, they relaxed a little and Rey allowed herself to sit back against the seat finally.

_ <Did you talk to the others about what they told Luke earlier?> _ She sent, trying to distract herself.

Kylo started slightly and turned from craning his neck around behind them,  _ <Yes, sounds like we matched up nicely. Ingalan said Luke tried getting some answers out of Hux too, but had no luck.> _

Rey frowned,  _ <You still haven’t actually properly explained why he is here in the first place.> _

Kylo sighed resignedly, but explained as best he could. It was a rather flimsy set of reasons, but Rey had to admit that Hux had been useful…  _ But why? _

_ <We should get into his head and find out for ourselves… and maybe wipe his memory as well.> _

Rey was surprised to feel a little sliver of reluctance through the bond as Kylo sent,  _ <What if we do something wrong and damage him?> _

_ <Kylo… I know he has been helpful, but this is HUX, we are talking about. Don’t believe for one second that he did this because he has reformed or something. He must have an agenda, and as soon as we don’t follow it, he will turn on us.> _

_ <I know, but… well, he didn’t this entire time.> _

_ <We will be gentle then, but we need to know… he has no connection to any of us, no reason to have come and helped, have risked his life… he could even have information about how all of this came about. His contact he spoke to may have given him extra information that he kept to himself. But there is no way of knowing without us looking in his head. If he didn’t tell Luke, a teacher, he isn’t going to tell anyone voluntarily.> _

Kylo nodded slightly and squeezed her sweaty hand, seemingly oblivious to the moisture,  _ <Okay, you’re right. But let my mother have one last go before we do.> _

_ <Only if she talks to him before we get back to school,> _ Rey answered, again he nodded and she left it there. 

 

They made a brief rest stop in the evening, Luke looked exhausted and Rey offered to spell him. He chuckled, “Do you have a license?” Rey shook her head, “Then, no, thank you. I may ask Leia, I think she napped a little earlier and we are only a few hours away now.”

The Falcon was still a ways behind them, out of sight, Rey had given her comm to Leia and they were all keeping in touch, and as yet, there were no signs of pursuit. It was beginning to look like they would make it, but she wouldn’t relax till they were in the air, and she wouldn’t feel safe till they were back home.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was dark by the time they left the main roads and headed onto back ones, there was little space on the road but they met very few other vehicles and were able to press on. 

Yet Kylo’s nagging sense of unease slowly grew. Rey was asleep, but he knew what he felt, “Falcon, you guys see anyone of your tail? I’ve got a bad feeling. Something isn’t right.”

He saw Leia shift in her seat as her eyes flickered to him in the rear view, then she gently proceeded to poke Luke till he woke up.

“Someone has been behind us for a while, but they aren’t trying to catch us up or anything like that,” came Ingalan’s voice in his ear.

“Could there be someone ahead of you? Like an ambush?” Came Poe’s voice.

Kylo frowned, “I don’t see how they would know where we are heading.”

There was some static as conversation went back and forth in the Falcon, then Han’s voice said, “There are only three people who know where the plane is, Lando and Maz are completely trustworthy, the third is a contact of Lando’s who met us with the people carrier and is keeping an eye on the plane till we get back, but Lando wouldn’t have put us in contact if he didn’t trust him.”

There was a pause and then Hux’s voice sounded, “And does this man know of the bounty?”

There was a small pause, then Han’s voice snarled, “Ah, bantha shit! Leia, turn around, now!”

The crackle of warning had been rising in Kylo as the conversation ran on, and at Han’s words it spiked, alarmingly. They were at a narrow part of the road, “Mum, don’t wait to turn around, reverse back to the next turning spot!” 

She had already slowed down, but before she could stop completely, something smashed through a thin hedge, hitting them side on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

_ “Shit! Kylo? Kylo? What the fuck just happened?” _

Chewie whined as he felt the rising panic and fear from the humans in the Falcon.

_ “No one is responding!” _

_ “Try Luke’s phone!” _

_ “No good!” _

Han slowed the Falcon and barked at the boys, “Grab your weapons and put on the body armour, now! We’ve got our own company to deal with, then we go after the others.”

Poe and Finn scrambled into the back of the van with Chewie and grabbed items from the back, throwing them to the others.

“As in Tatooine,” the nasty, pale boy hissed as he put on a sort of black vest, “Shoot to kill.”

Han didn’t disagree, adding, “Chewie, go for the throats, avoid the guns, okay?” Chewie sent him a growl of agreement, “Boys, let him out the back first. When you get out, stay low and get to cover before returning fire.  _ GO!” _

As soon as the gap was big enough Chewie leapt out of the Falcon, hackles raised, lips pulled back to show all his teeth, eyes and ears seeking out any movement of the enemy. 

It was time to protect his pack.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey groaned as a hard grip dragged her out of an odd, painful position; she couldn’t remember where she was or what she had been doing, only that whoever had a hold of her,  _ should not have. _

A bright light was shone on her face, hurting her eyes and then was moved down to where a hand still gripped her left arm, “That’s the scar, it’s her.”

“What about the others?”

“They’re still mostly unconscious, light them up and let’s get going.”

She knew that hard, emotionless voice…  _ what others? Light them up? … Kylo! _

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Apparently the enemy did not often come across animals like Chewie. They were afraid of him. He could smell their fear as a sour tang in the air, their blood was hot and their screams were loud.

There was some pain, but Chewie knew it was not urgent and he and the others killed their enemies quickly.

“Good boy, Chew,” Han told him as they paused to breathe, “Okay, we don’t know what we’ll be walking into, Ingalan, you, Zainmar and Chewie and I are going to flank them on foot, Poe, you’re driving, not too fast, mind. If you need to, ram their vehicle. The Falcon isn’t important right now. Go!”

Then they were running, Chewie could feel a burning pain in his haunch but ignored it. He and Han took one side, running parallel with the road, keeping to the shadows, and the two boys took the otherside.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Kylo was aware of pain, a ringing in his head, he blinked his eyes, there was something warm and sticky running into them, as it reached his lips he realised it was blood. Something was missing. Someone shifted beside him and groaned - Leonmar…  _ wait, where was Rey? _

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey’s wrists were bound and she was picked up. “No!” She started struggling, impatiently flailing her legs caught in her skirt.

“ _Yes,”_ a voice hissed in her ear, “Boba get her legs... Jabba promised us if we found you, we got you to ourselves for twenty four hours.”

Oddly, his words calmed her, she remembered who she was, what she could do, she screamed,  _ <KYLO! WAKE UP! THEY ARE GOING TO SET FIRE TO THE CAR!> _

Then she stilled her body, took a steadying breath, and reached for the Force.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Chewie didn’t pause as he ran, just launched himself at the first enemy he saw, hitting him squarely with paws on his chest as he ripped into his throat. The man was dead before he reached the ground and Chewie headed towards the car his humans were in.

Shots and yells rang out in the darkness, there was an enemy approaching the car with fire in his hands. 

Chewie did not like fire. But he headed for the enemy anyway, before he could reach him, the man went down with a cry, as he fell the fire caught on his clothing and he started screaming, Chewie grinned and went on to the next enemy.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

 

_ <KYLO! WAKE UP! THEY ARE GOING TO SET FIRE TO THE CAR!> _ Kylo didn’t even wince as Rey’s scream echoed in his head.

He came fully awake and sat up, undid his seatbelt and roughly slapped Leonmar and Javiell who were still coming to, then leant forward and punched Luke in the shoulder, “Wake the fuck up, we need to get out!”

He turned sharply as he heard Leia and Javiell’s doors open, but to his relief, he saw Ingalan and Zainmar.

A surge of warning shocked him into whipping around and he threw his arm out without thinking, the Force worked through him, stopping the bullets that had been fired at the wrecked car.

“Get out, quickly, I don’t know how long I can hold them,” he growled. A vague memory stirred in the depths of his mind, but it wasn’t one of his, it was one of his mirror-self, and the knowledge slipped into his mind. He could reverse the bullets trajectory… but if he did that, they may hit Rey, he still wasn’t sure what direction she was in. But he could divert them.

He gritted his teeth, the effort made him sweat, the salt stinging all the cuts he had sustained, but he managed it.

Ingalan grabbed him by the neck and hauled him backwards, out of the car and down beside the road.

Kylo wiped sweat and blood out of his eyes with a shaky hand, “We need to find Rey!”

Then he felt her, she’d gone deadly calm, focused, and he felt the large amount of power she pulled to her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey could feel that Kylo was awake and okay, there had been no screams of fire, so she concentrated on herself.

An idea seeded itself in her mind, and she smiled slightly and pushed darkness on the Twins, causing them to pass out, like Kylo’s mirror-self had done to her, when he hunted her in the forest.

The fall jarred her, but at least she was cushioned against the Twin that had been holding her.

She struggled into a sitting position just as Chewie came bounding up to her, eyes glowing in the dark.

Rey gave him a pained grin, but stopped him before he could attack the Twin’s, “Leave them, Chewie, I need them for something.”

Chewie gave her a doubtful look from a muzzle covered in blood, but he just sat down beside her with a groan as his eyes scanned the darkness, guarding her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

The others joined them, helping the crash victims onto their feet, Han almost carrying Leia, though she appeared mostly shaken, stunned by the airbag that had triggered, rather than injured.

Once Kylo was on his feet he headed to where he could feel Rey,  _ <Rey?> _

She was still calm as she replied,  _ <Kylo! Are you okay? Is everyone okay?> _

_ <Yeah, I think so,> _ he quickened his pace when he saw her, sitting with Chewie beside two men… 

“Are those the Fett’s?” He asked harshly as he reached her, fury uncoiling when her saw her bound hands, the blood and cuts on her face, chest and arms.

“Yes, but wa-”

Kylo pulled out his gun with a snarl, he was going to  _ end _ them, he was going to fucking  _ execute  _ them, right, fucking  _ now. _

He was shocked as Rey brought up her hands and he found he couldn’t move, “What the hell are you doing? They need to die!” He yelled, anger and confusion waring inside him, “Why are you protecting them?!”

Rey looked back at him steadily, “Trust me, when we are done, they will die… But I have an idea that I think you will like.”

She finished with a smile and he felt himself released as he lowered his gun.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So, to make Rey’s desert tea, you need a metal kettle or pot, black tea leaves, Habek mint
> 
> (also called Habak or Habbak), Marmaraya (desert sage), and sugar or honey. Best brewed on an open fire. It is epic.
> 
> Thank you so much for all your lovely comments ♥ I am a walking disaster lol.


	88. No Loose Ends

 

Kylo’s face was a blend of warring emotions, but he lowered his gun and after a second, knelt to free Rey’s wrists.

“Are you okay? Is anyone seriously injured?” she asked as he worked.

“Minor injuries, I think… So, what’s this plan?” he answered gruffly.

Rey sighed and flexed her freed wrists, “Simple. We mind trick the Fett’s into going back to Tatooine to kill Jabba. Jabba dies, the Fett’s probably will in the aftermath, and no one can trace it back to us.”

Kylo looked at her with wide eyed surprise, which morphed into a grin. Even with blood on his pale face and his hair a tangled mess, he still took her breath away.

“You, my love, are a fucking genius,” he said as he pulled her to him, bruising her lips with a fierce, possessive kiss.

“This is  _ not _ a good time to be doing that,” came Han’s voice, and Kylo pulled away from her as they both looked up at him, “You alright kiddo?” he asked Rey, as he raised his eyebrows at the Fett’s still out cold on the ground.

Rey nodded, “Yeah, I’m okay. What about everyone else?”

Han snorted, “They’ll live. But we need to get the hell outta here, pronto.”

Rey exchanged a look with Kylo,  _ <Will the adults let us do this?> _

Kylo gave her a small shrug, _ <Let’s find out.> _

“We have a plan,” he gestured to the Fetts, “We want to… use our abilities to influence them into going back to Tatooine to assassinating Jabba.”

Han gave a disbelieving chuckle, “What do you mean,  _ influence _ them?”

Kylo shrugged, “We can get people to do things or forget things.”

Han’s eyebrows raised, “You’re really serious?”

Rey nodded, “Yes… and we can try and have a look inside their heads while we do it, see if they know who was behind this whole thing.”

“If we kill Jabba, and Jabba’s guards kill the Fetts’, then no one should come after us. Otherwise it may not be safe for Rey to stay at school.” 

Han rubbed his chin, “Your mother won’t like it,” he said, but he was clearly considering it.

“If we get it done now, she doesn’t have to like it, she looked pretty out of it when I left to come and find Rey.”

Han looked back towards where the Falcon was parked up, the others were treating wounds, clearing debris from the road and dragging bodies out of sight. “Do it,” he told them, “Quickly. Chewie and I will stay and watch you, just in case this doesn’t work out,” he pulled his gun out and unclicked the safety.

Rey looked at Kylo, “One at a time? You do the search and I’ll do the trick? Should we wake them first?

Kylo nodded, as he removed his ear comm and put it in his pocket, “Yeah, wake them, but let’s tie them up first, we can use the rope they used on you.”

They quickly went through the Fetts’ clothes, removing weapons and phones, then tied their wrists and ankles up.

“Okay, let’s do this,” Rey said and couldn’t help grinning as she slapped one of the Twin’s round the face,  _ hard _ .

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

The twin Rey slapped came to with a curse and immediately started struggling, Kylo quickly knelt and pressed a knee on their chest, using his weight to keep them down.

He moved his right hand close the the twin’s face, but withdrew it as the man tried to bite him. Then Rey was there, a feral snarl on her face as she placed her knife blade at the twin’s throat, “Stay still or you die,” she told him softly, “You know I will do it.”

A bead of blood bloomed as the Twin pressed his neck up, testing her resolve, then he relaxed back down, eyes dead of emotion as he asked calmly, “What do you want?”

“For you to stay still,” Kylo told him and brought his hand back and pushed into the twin’s head.

It was disorientating, he’d never actually done this himself, there had been the time he’d accidentally entered Rey’s mind but he’d left straight away, and anyway, that was with the bond.

This was different, there was a lot of resistance and he shut his eyes as he concentrated, pushing into the twin’s mind.

It was nasty place, on the surface it was like the twin’s eyes, dead and dull, but as he moved through it, searching for answers, he found that it was dark, full of disturbing desires and violent deeds… the twin was clearly sociopathic. 

He found a name, _ Boba _ … but there was nothing relating to Jabba telling the Fett’s who it was that ordered Rey’s kidnap, though if he were honest with himself he hadn’t expected them to know. The Fett’s were good, but they were still grunts.

And then Kylo found what they had planned to do to Rey… with a hoarse howl of rage he ripped himself out of the twin’s mind before he could see anymore, throwing himself back and away from the body that he wanted to rip apart, to tear limb from limb, so those depraved, abhorrent thoughts could no longer exist. He swallowed down bile as he stared through the red mist that seemed to tinge everything - the beast was so close to breaking free; he was holding on to it with it by a mere thread. He had never wanted to let it loose more than he did in this moment.

_ <KYLO! WHAT HAPPENED?> _

Rey’s shout in his head made him realise she’d been shouting for several moments as she and Han held the twin down.

Kylo swallowed again, looking away from them so he didn’t have to look at either of the Fett’s,  _ <I saw something bad, really bad. There was nothing about knowing who ordered your kidnap. I can’t, I can’t be near them right now, or I’ll lose it.> _

Strong arms engulfed him as the bodies of his Knights piled onto him,  _ just in time, _ the beast was getting stronger.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Rey turned away from watching the Knights restraining Kylo to look at Han, “He saw something, I don’t know what, but it was bad… he did find out they nothing about who ordered my kidnap though,” she paused to pat Chewie who was whining in concern over Kylo, but she did not remove her knife from the twin’s throat, “I can do the rest, but I need you to hold him down a moment.”

Han nodded, “Do what you need to. Chewie, it’s okay, Ben will be alright.”

There was a suggestion of a smirk at the corners of the twin’s mouth when she looked back down at him; oh, how she wanted to rip the expression off his face, but she didn’t. What she was going to do would be better, in the long run.

She calmed her mind, sinking into the welcome frigid depths of the cold void as she looked down at the twin, his eyes had changed as hers had, a spark of recognition in them, as if he recognised where she had gone. The knowledge wouldn’t help him though.

Rey brushed his mind, finding resistance there, she pulled on the force, layering her voice with the power she needed to make this work.

“You will return to Tatooine,” she told him, pushing her commands into his mind, waiting for the twin’s response before she carried on, “You will assassinate Jabba Desilijic Tiure… You will remain still for the next three hours… You will not remember this encounter.”  

Rey drew a shaky breath as the twin finished repeating her last command, it had required more of her, than the guard at the roadblock, and she had the other twin to do yet.

The twin had relaxed and she drew her knife away from his throat as she looked at Han, “We’ll cut them loose just before we leave.”

The Knights had dragged Kylo further away and she couldn’t feel him through the coldness, she’d have to check on him later, this needed to be done; she moved on to the next twin.

“I can’t believe that worked,” Han said quietly as he pressed his knee down on the next twin.

Rey shook her head, “We’ll only know it’s worked when Jabba is dead,” she told him, then slapped the next twin’s face.

He woke as his brother had, immediately trying to fight them and Rey had to press her knife more firmly into his neck, drawing more blood.

“Remain still,” she ordered, but he continued to struggle and she had to try several times before she could make her commands stick, she was dimly aware that she was exhausted and in pain but this was too important a task, and Kylo wasn’t in any state to help her right now.

Once she had finally made it work and he had repeated her commands back to her, body still and finally unresisting, she opened her eyes.

But all she saw was darkness as it swallowed her whole.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

“Kylo? Are you in there, brother?” 

Kylo could recognise Ingalan’s voice but was unable to process it as he struggled against their hold on him. He wanted to get to the Fett’s, to wipe them off the face of the earth, crack their skulls and trample the brains that had come up with those sick designs, those monstrous plans… and on top of all that, they’d already  _ cut _ her,  _ hurt _ her,  _ abused  _ her.  

“What the hell happened?” Zainmar asked through gritted teeth.

“No fucking idea,” Leonmar answered, “We can find out later.”

He couldn’t feel anything but the blank cold through the bond that indicated Rey was in deep, he hated it, hated anything that kept her from him.

“Ben.”

His beast paused at the voice of his mother, and then Chewie’s nose was thrust into his ear.

“Benjamin Solo, you will calm down right this second and explain to me what on earth is going on,” her voice was firm, demanding,  _ he hated it. _ He hated that name she used, _ it wasn’t him. _

Then Chewie whined and laid a long lick across his ear and cheek, “Chewie!”

Somehow the tension slowly began leaking out of him and his limbs stilled their flailing, Chewie licked him again, grinning down at him as the dogs eyes glowed in the darkness.

“Gah! Quit it, you giant walking carpet!”

“Kylo?” Ingalan’s face made it into his field of vision, and Kylo loved him all the more for calling him by his chosen name in front of his mother.

Kylo swallowed, breathed out, “Yeah, I’m here. You can let me up… but don’t let go, don't let me anywhere near _ them.” _

He couldn’t say their name, his control was tenuous at best, he could still feel the rage bubbling away inside him, making his blood hot, his hands itch…  _ No, _ don’t think about that right now.

The Knights got him up and moving back towards the Falcon, Chewie padding beside them, Leia walking slightly in front.

“Ben, you need to explain to me what is going on. What are Rey and Han doing? Why aren’t the Fe-”

Kylo snarled and Ingalan clapped a hand over Leia’s mouth, everyone stilled, Leia and Ingalan in shock at Ingalan’s action and the other Knights as they anchored themselves more firmly to Kylo as they felt the tension in him amp up again.

Ingalan swallowed and removed his hand, “Sorry, Mrs Organa. Err, it really is best if he doesn’t talk right now, or it may set him off again.”

Leia’s lips thinned and her eyes grew tight with irritation, but she nodded, and started walking briskly back towards the Falcon.

“Shit,” Zainmar said, with feeling, Ingalan just nodded.

When they reached the Falcon, Kylo sat in the back and Zainmar looked at the damage he had sustained from the crash as the others walled Kylo in.

As the red mist receded, Kylo was ashamed to see that the others were injured from the fighting, the crash and probably to some extent from himself. At that thought all his anger drained away, replaced by shame.

The Knights, his  _ brothers _ , had never failed to support him, to protect him… to love him, unconditionally. And what did he give them in return? _ Bruises.  _ He gave them _ fucking bruises.  _ They’d risked their very lives in this endeavour, they didn’t have to, and yet they had joined him, with no hesitation. He simply did not deserve them.

Leonmar handed him a bottle of water and Kylo took a mouthful, then cleared his throat awkwardly, “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, Leia and the other boys had given them some space, but he knew Hux was trying his best to listen without seeming to. “I don’t deserve your friendship. Your brotherhood-”

Zainmar rolled his eyes at him, “Shut up, Kylo.”

Leonmar lightly punched Zainmar on the shoulder, as Ingalan crouched down to look Kylo in the eyes, “There is nothing to apologise for, brother-” Kylo opened his mouth to disagree and Ingalan shook his head and carried right on, “We knew of the beast when we bound ourselves by blood. It was our choice, and none of us yet regret it.”

Kylo’s chest constricted as the others nodded, he didn’t know what to say to that, there were no suitable words, he blinked his eyes as they burned a little. Everyone suddenly looked away, shuffling uncomfortably, suddenly awkward.

Zainmar had just finished sorting Kylo’s injuries out when he felt the bond abruptly go dark. Kylo shot to his feet and was about to run towards where Rey was, when the Knights all grabbed hold of him.

“Something’s wrong with Rey!”

“Jav and I will go and check,” Ingalan answered, already running with Javiell not far behind.

“They’ll tell us if they need us, Kylo. We got all the bad guys,” Leonmar said as he and Zainmar held onto Kylo.

Kylo probed the bond, Rey was unconscious, “Can we at least go round the side so we can see better?”

Zainmar and Leonmar glanced at each other, then shrugged, “I guess so,” Zainmar said.

As they walked round the side of the Falcon, Han came out of the darkness, Chewie, Ingalan and Javeill by his side, with Rey in his arms.

Leia was the first one to reach him, “What happened?” she asked, clearly fed up with not knowing what was going on, as she thumbed open one of Rey’s unresponsive eyes.

Han shook his head, “I think she’s just drained,” his eyes met Kylo’s, “She got it done though.”

“Got what done, exactly?” Luke asked.

Han’s eyes flickered to Kylo’s again, “Why don’t we talk about this later. It’s time we left this mess behind us.” 

 

They all piled into the Falcon, as the people carrier was a write off, the adults were all in the front, Finn, Poe, Hux and Kylo went in the back seats, Kylo with Rey cradled in his lap, and the Knights went in the back with Chewie.

Everyone stayed quiet, it was awkward and cramped but it was less than an hour’s drive to reach the plane. 

Rey was small and silent in his arms, every time he looked at her face he had to look away again as images of what he’d seen in the twin’s mind would surface, caused his stomach to roil with fury.

“Will she be okay?” Finn asked softly.

Kylo nodded, “I think so, it’s mainly exhaustion, though we need to check her for injuries from the crash when we get on the plane.”

Hux, who had somehow ended up next to Kylo, frowned as he looked down at Rey, “What if she’s got a head injury? Shouldn’t we wake her?” He brushed some strands of hair away from Rey’s face. 

Kylo tensed, shooting a glare at Hux as he drew Rey away from the other boy as much as he could, “ _ Do not _ , touch her,” he breathed, keeping his voice low.

Hux glared back at him but moved his hand away and turned to look out of the windscreen.

Kylo looked back down at Rey with concern, as much as he hated to admit it, Hux had a point, what if she did have a head injury? He knew he was tired, but the adrenaline still in his system was keeping him going for now, and Hux had seen so much by this point that this really wouldn’t matter… Kylo pulled on the force and trickled it as gently as he could into Rey’s body. He was relieved to find there was nothing serious, just cuts and bruises and fatigue; she felt…  _ depleted, _ and even with the healing she remained sound asleep.

When Kylo opened his eyes again he could feel his muscles trembling; once they were back at school he planned on sleeping solidly for a few days… but maybe with occasional breaks to eat a lot, too.

 

They reached the plane without mishap, though they did find the body of the contact that had sold them out. Leia kept the boys in the Falcon while Luke and Han moved it elsewhere. Kylo wasn’t sure why she bothered, they’d been clearing away bodies of men they’d killed an hour ago.

When it came time to get out of the Falcon, Kylo stumbled and almost dropped Rey, and would have if Hux hadn’t steadied him and pushed him to sit back down.

“Let me take her, you look like you’re about to pass out.”

Kylo gave him an incredulous look, “There is no way in hell I am letting you touch her.”

Hux’s lips thinned and his eyes became icy, “It’s barely thirty feet from here to the plane, just hand her over.”

“I’ll take her,” Leonmar said as the Knights joined them, shouldering Hux aside.

Kylo passed Rey over and stumbled up, Zainmar slung an arm around his shoulder and they moved towards the plane, leaving Hux muttering to himself behind them.

“What was that about?” Ingalan asked quietly.

Kylo checked to see that they had some space before saying, “I healed her, just in case she had a head injury or something, but it drained me and I almost fell with her when I got out, Hux was trying to take her off me.” Perhaps it had been an over reaction, but the idea of Hux touching her when she was unconscious  _ (again), _ felt wrong, _ and  _ it would infuriate her if she found out about it later. 

Zainmar snorted softly, “Sure, if it were just you and he, that would make sense. But with the rest of us around? No. No need for him to touch her at all.”

“And was there a head injury?” Ingalan asked.

Kylo shook his head, “No, just minor-” he cut off, a warning tingle flaring through him, “ _ STOP!” _

He’d flung out his arms for good measure, stopping them in their tracks and everyone else who was following behind.

They all stilled, with everything they had been through, they took him seriously. Kylo pushed his senses out and felt Ingalan move to his other side to help Zainmar support him.

“What is it?” Luke asked as he and Leia came to stand by them.

“I don’t know exactly,” Kylo answered slowly as he tried to pinpoint the source or at least the precise place the warning had been for. “I think there is a trap or something like it, on or by the plane.”

Luke frowned, “Of course, if they disposed of Couladin, they probably left a nasty surprise in case anyone made it back here,” he sighed and rubbed his face, “Hux, Poe, one of you drive the Falcon a hundred foot or so away, all of you need to stay in the van. We will deal with this, then be on our way. Off you go, quickly now.”

Han gave the keys to Poe and they piled back in. Kylo was too tired to make Leonmar give him Rey, he was barely awake, barely holding on to lucidity.

“Sleep, Kylo. You need to. We will keep watch and I will wake you if anything happens, I promise,” Ingalan said quietly.

Kylo would have protested, but Ingalan’s words acted almost as if a switch had been flipped, and sleep took him.

   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear readers, again, apologies: this isn’t great and my brain isn’t functioning well atm. Updating is likely to be sporadic for a while, I think... If I've made any blunders, please do point them out, I would be most grateful ♥


	89. Destruction Or Distraction

 

As the pups drove away in the Falcon, Chewie stood by Han as he, Luke and Leia talked. 

Chewie could not smell any bad humans near, well apart from the dead one. Chewie’s lip curled in disgust, that traitor was lucky he was dead, or Chewie would have ripped him apart for his betrayal.

Chewie sneezed and returned his attention back to the talk between his humans.

“... and I still want to know what you and Rey were doing with the Fetts? What happened to send Ben… into such a state?” Leia’s tone was frustrated, her scent a swirl of anxiety and anger.

Han let out a quiet sigh, as if he were trying to repress it, but Chewie heard it, “Let’s worry about that later, it isn’t pressing. We need to locate whatever is was that Ben sensed as soon as possible. It is unlikely, but it may be on a timer.”

Leia let out a small sound of annoyance, but Luke spoke before she could reply, “Would Chewie be able to find it?”

Chewie wiggled his haunches with pride, even though there was a pain in one side. He communicated to Han that he could do what they needed.

Han nodded as he knelt down so they were eye to eye, “Okay buddy, remember the bad men that Rey was with earlier?” Chewie growled an affirmative, “Whatever it is, was likely set by them, so see if you can scout out their scent, but be careful. Light feet and cautious, okay? When you find it, tell us, don’t touch it or go to near it, clear?”

Chewie rolled his eyes, humans could be very silly, of course he would be careful; his extra senses meant he was more careful than any  _ human _ … well, perhaps Ben-pup and Rey-pup, and sometimes Luke and Leia were more aware, but still.

He grinned as Han ruffled his ears, then put his nose to the ground and started exploring the mixed scents.

His humans stood back, talking softly, letting him work and he let his awareness of them slip to the back of his mind, concentrating on his important task.

There were many scents where there only should have been Han’s, Luke’s, Leia’s and the traitor’s. He found the scents of the humans that Han had mentioned, they were the bad humans that had stolen Rey-pup in the beginning, the ones who had hurt Leia. He had very much wanted to kill them earlier, but Rey-pup had not let him. He had been frustrated but Rey-pup was quite wise for a pup, so he had obeyed her. He liked Rey-pup. She was nice, and she had helped Ben-pup. Over the last few years there had been something interfering with Ben-pup, he wasn’t sure what, but when Rey-pup had arrived, she had somehow stopped it, her link with Ben-pup had freed him of it, Chewie did not know how or why, but it was good, she was good.

The scent of the bad humans was violent and cold in his nose, they were evil, barely human. He carefully followed where the scent led him, setting his big paws down gently as he went. 

Finally, he came to a concentrated knot of scents, and as he lifted his nose up filtering the air, he sensed something foreign attached to the wing of the plane, something that was thick with the cold smell of the bad humans.

Chewie stopped and gave a short, sharp bark. He stayed where he was, watching the thing as his humans made their way to where he was.

As Han arrived, Chewie communicated what he had found, “Well done, Chewie,” Han answered as he patted Chewie’s shoulder, before explaining to Luke and Leia.

“It’s there,” Han pointed, “By the propeller,” he and Luke moved cautiously closer so they could study it and Leia came and stood by Chewie, she absently patted him before folding her arms as she watched Han and Luke.

“It’s a IED,” Luke said and Han nodded, “And you were right, it’s on a timer. Six hours to go.”

“So there’s no trigger?” Han asked.

Luke shook his head, “None, there is probably some failsafe that means we cannot remove it easily. I don’t want to get on the plane to get my tools just on the off chance there is a radio trigger rigged to the door, do you have any tools the Falcon?”

Han rubbed his chin, “Possibly, I’ll go and look. Chewie, stay on guard.” Chewie made a small grumble but did as he was asked as Han strode away. 

“I’ll come with you, and you can explain what Rey and Kylo were doing earlier,” Leia said in a firm voice as she trotted to catch up to Han’s long stride.

Chewie heard Han sigh, but he paused for her to catch up to him before he carried on.

Luke stepped away, leaving some space between him and the thing attached to the wing.

A few moments later, both Luke and Chewie started slightly as they heard Leia yelled, “You let them do what?!” Before Han hushed her.

Luke looked at Chewie and raised his eyebrows, “I am really glad I’m not Han right now.”

Chewie grinned and dipped his head in agreement - Leia could be scary sometimes.

Leia’s scent was full of agitated anger when she and Han returned. Han looked unhappy, but Chewie could tell he was starting to become angry himself. Them both angry was never a good thing, it usually led to lots of shouting, slammed doors and days of lonely seething; so Chewie trotted towards them, wagging his tail as if nothing were wrong, hoping to distract them.

It worked a little, Leia stopped muttering under her breath and Han’s forehead relaxed a little at least.

“Rey’s tool kit, and a few of mine that were lying around,” Han told Luke as he handed him a bundle.

Luke nodded and quickly got to work while Han held a torch so he could see what he was doing. Leia watched, her arms folded tightly, her irritation making Chewie want to sneeze. He decided he’d take another scout around the plane, just in case he’d missed something, but mainly to put some space between his sensitive nose and Leia.

He quartered the ground, going back and forth rather than following a specific scent, he didn’t find anything significant until he took advantage of the wheels to cock his leg.

Just as he was about to pee he caught a faint scent of something that didn’t belong there, he lowered his leg again and snuffled around till he found something small attached to the inside rim of a wheel, there were vibrations coming off it, the sort humans couldn’t sense.

Chewie once again sat and gave a short, sharp bark. Leia joined him, so Han and Luke must still be busy. Her scent had calmed out a little at least.

“What have you found?” she asked him softly.

Leia didn’t really understand him the way Han did, but Chewie whined and thrust his nose at the small suspicious thing, and she got the idea. 

She shone a torch at it, “You, Chewbacca, are a very clever boy.”  Chewie rolled his eyes but couldn’t help doing a happy little wiggle, Leia smiled at him, he liked her smile, her  _ real  _ one. “Go and fetch Han would you? He and Luke need to see this and I think they should be done with the IED soon.”

Chewie trotted off, slowing as he approached Han and Luke, he grumbled an explanation to Han, who looked over his shoulder at him, still holding the torch, “Okay, we’ll be there in a second. Well done, Chew.”

“I thought this was too easy,” Luke muttered as he delicately prodded at the bad thing, “This was too obvious, a distraction. Guess they hoped we’d find this and assume that was it.”

Han merely grunted agreement. It was only a few moments more till Luke was carefully holding the thing in his hands, “The timer is off, as is the trigger, but it’s still volatile. It is small, but even so, in the air it would have likely killed us all if it had gone off. Go and look at what Chewie found, Han. I’ll take care of this.”

Han nodded and followed Chewie back to where Leia was waiting, “Luke managed to removed it all right,” Han told Leia as he reached her, though he avoided her eyes, “What has Chewie found for us this time?”

Leia knelt and pointed, Han joined her on the ground, letting out an appreciative whistle as he saw what was there, “Crafty bastards,” he brushed his fingers over it and Leia blanched, flinching away with a gasp and Han quickly put a comforting hand on her arm, “It’s okay, love, it’s a simple tracker, guess they wanted to make sure we were from the school and that’s where we were going back to.” 

Leia let out a shuddering breath and leaned against Han, Chewie hid a grin as Han’s arm wrapped around her and pulled her tight against him.

“Rest easy sweetheart, you’ll get the kids home, I’ll get the Falcon home and… and I know you don’t like it, but what Rey did, should mean that we won’t have any more trouble from the South for a while,” Leia tensed against him, but Han carried on, “If this gets us off Jabba’s and the Fett’s sensors, it can only be a good thing. If they are all killed, it’s not only good for us, but good for the people of Tatooine, and beyond. The kids… well, they aren’t really kids anymore are they? They’ve seen and done too much, it may have been a rash expedition, but they achieved what they set out to… and Rey, well, she wasn’t really a kid when she came to Canto Bight,” Leia opened her mouth with an angry sound but again Han spoke over her, “I know in some ways she is more like a child, some parts of her weren’t able to mature like the kids at school, but the decision to do… that to the Fett’s, was done because she wanted to protect us and herself, and after all she’s been through, I think she deserves some peace of mind, don’t you?”

Leia opened her mouth and closed it again, then shook her head, “If you put it like that, well, yes, I can see that. Despite all her strengths, she is such a fragile creature; of course I want her to feel safe… I just wish there had been a way for us to make her safe, rather than her having to take such drastic action… she basically executed them, Han. Even if she doesn’t wield the actual weapon that kills them, she will be responsible for their deaths.”

Chewie rolled his eyes, though he kept his muzzle faced away, if what Rey-pup had done led to the deaths of the bad humans, why worry? She was a clever pup, a good pup, she was protecting her pack.

Han sighed, “Somehow, I think Rey will be okay with that. You saw Jakku, growing up somewhere like that is all about survival… Leia, this would probably not the first deaths on her hands.”

Chewie looked back at them as Leia jerked her head up, drawing away from Han as she looked at him intently, “What do you mean?”

Han sighed again and rubbed his chin, “You’ve seen her files, her medical records, I think it likely sometimes her only option to survive was kill or be killed,” He gave her the ghost of a lopsided smile, “There is a reason she beat the living shite out of Hux and only stopped when she was pulled off him.”

Leia shook her head, to Chewie’s surprise, the corners of her mouth were slightly curved, “Perhaps… I like her, no, I am very fond of her… but is she really what Ben  _ needs? _ ”

Chewie couldn’t help emitting a disapproving growl and they both turned to look at him in surprise, as if they had forgotten he was with them. He glared baleful at Han as he told him exactly what he thought of Leia’s comment.

Han chuckled, “Chewie disagrees with you, and to be honest, so do I. Rey may not be what we would have chosen, but I think she _ is _ what Ben needs… and since they’ve been together, only in that short time, he seems… I don’t know, more grounded?” Han shrugged, “Something like that. And anyway, with the bond they share, I doubt there is any way out of that.”

Leia let out a soft sigh and nodded, “You’re right, of course. I’m not thinking straight, it’s been a very stressful week, a very stressful few hours.”

Han nodded and pulled Leia against him again, she went with little protest, and they sat together under the sky full of stars, communicating without words all the things they wished they could say to each other.

 

They all jumped as a loud bang and flash of light went off in the distance. Chewie growled, standing so he was in front of his humans, pale eyes scanning the darkness in search of enemies.

Han stood, patting Chewie’s shoulder, “Easy boy, that was just Luke, disposing of the IED, no cause for alarm.”

Han helped Leia to her feet and they walked around the plane, Han speaking with his hand pressed to his ear, “Alright Poe, safe to come on back now.”

As they waited, Leia turned to face Han, taking one of his large hands in her smaller ones, “You better come back to me in one piece, Han Solo. I mean it, no dilly dallying around, you and Chewie come straight home, okay?”

Han gave her his best roguish grin, “I’ve never ‘dilly dallied’ in my life!”

Leia rolled her eyes, but smiled, “Perhaps what I mean is;  _ no _ gambling,  _ no _ drinking and  _ no _ looking up old, _ criminal, _ acquaintances!”

Han chuckled, “Fine. None of that. Chewie and I are looking forward to a quiet journey and getting back to the workshop, aren’t we boy?”

Chewie grinned up at him, grumbling his agreement - this had been a good adventure, but he was quite ready to go back home now, he missed his sofa.

Leia smiled, “Well good, just so we’re clear,” she started towards the Falcon that had just drawn up.

“I love you,” Han called softly to her.

Leia turned, smirking, looking quite like Ben-pup, “I know,” she said and turned back towards the Falcon.

Han snorted softly in response, his scent a mixture of devotion and amusement. Chewie rubbed his head on Han’s hip, letting him know he loved him too.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Once again, this is much later than I hoped it would be, sorry! Thank you for your lovely comments and your patience, you guys are really wonderful ♥
> 
> I have updated my pinterest boards, have a gander if you fancy it and feel free to let me know if you want to see something on there I haven’t got yet ^_^ [Here](https://www.pinterest.co.uk/AmberDDread/from-one-spark-to-the-horizon-wide/)


	90. Leaving

_“Shitting hell!_ What _was_ that?”

Rey jerked awake, momentarily unsure as to where she was, before realising she was in the Falcon. She blinked in confusion, finding herself on Leonmar’s lap and she quickly struggled into a more upright position as the boys in the van exclaimed over something they’d just heard.

“What’s going on? Where’s Kylo?”

Leonmar used his right shoulder to indicate Kylo, who was fast asleep next to them, seemingly undisturbed by the noise everyone was making. “He passed out earlier, he’s fine, just drained. How are you feeling?”

Rey shook her head slightly, “I’m fine, but what’s going on? Why is everyone freaking out?”

“There was an explosion just now,” Zainmar said excitedly, on the other side of Leonmar, “Or something like it anyway. The adults sent us away from the plane as there was some kind of trap or bomb!”

Rey felt her body tense and go cold, but before she could struggle off Leonmar’s lap to get out of the Falcon, everyone seemed to breathe a sigh of relief as they held their ears.

Zainmar tapped her arm and smiled, “It’s okay, Han said we can go back to the plane.”

Rey let her breath out, only now realising she’d held onto it, then probed the bond; it was dark and silent, but Kylo was fine, just deeply asleep.

She wanted to wriggle and have a stretch but decided it would be best to wait till they were out of the van - there wasn’t a spare seat free and doing that whilst on Leonmar would be weird.

“Hey, what were you doing earlier? After the crash when Kylo lost it?” Zainmar asked her quietly.

Rey wasn’t sure she wanted to tell them just yet; she wouldn’t be able to believe it had worked till Jabba’s death was announced.

“Kylo and I were looking into the Fett’s minds to see if we could find out of they knew who had ordered my kidnap. I don’t know what Kylo saw in there, but I am guessing it wasn’t good… Thanks for handling him.”

Zainmar and Leonmar exchanged looks, eyebrows raised.

“Leia wouldn’t have been so pissed off if that’s all you did, Rey,” Leonmar said quietly, a little hurt entering his tone and Rey instantly felt guilty.

She flickered her eyes over to where Hux sat in front of them, then leaned closer to Zainmar and Leonmar, “I’ll tell you later,” she said softly.

They nodded their understanding as Poe pulled the Falcon to a stop next to what looked like a small ex military transport plane. It was not what she had been expecting, though in truth, she hadn’t really thought as far ahead as to what sort of plane it would be.

Rey was happy to slither off Leonmar’s lap, though to her embarrassment Zainmar had to steady her as her feet hit the ground and she wobbled.

She had just balanced on her own but she was engulfed by Finn, “Peanut!” he said happily as he gave her a bear hug, “Are you okay?”

Rey smiled and hugged him back, “Yeah, just tired, are you alright?”

He shrugged as he stepped back a ways, “Yeah, a bit banged up but okay. I’m just glad everyone is alright, that was pretty brutal.” Rey just nodded.

“All right everyone, we have resolved the problem and it is now safe for us to leave. Please can you all gather your belongings and head towards the plane,” Leia said as she reached them, suddenly sounding very teacher like again.

Everyone started doing as they were told, somehow slipping easily into the pupil mindset again. Rey went to do the same but Leia caught her, “Rey, the plane can be quite chilly, so would you like to change back into your jeans and t-shirt? I’m sure we can find a spare jumper or blanket to wrap you in as well.”

Rey couldn’t help grinning, she _hated_ skirts, “That would be great, thank you.”

Leia smiled, “Skirts aren’t the most practical items of clothing. If you wait till the boys are done, you can change by the Falcon so you have some privacy. For now, perhaps you can wake Be- _ahem_ , Kylo? He is too large to carry easily.”

Rey nodded, carefully not reacting to Leia’s near mistake incase Hux was near enough to hear, “I’ll try, but he is pretty deep under right now.”

“He doesn’t have to be fully awake, just enough to walk the short distance to the plane with help, then he can go back to sleep. He obviously needs it, and you look like you should do the same, once we have set off, Rey.”

Rey blushed slightly, she hated being this weak, especially when Kylo was out of it… but she trusted the Knights, the others to a certain degree (apart from Hux) but she knew the Knights to be mostly unafraid of doing what was necessary.

She climbed back into the Falcon and settled next to Kylo. There was a slight frown between his eyebrows, which eased as she took his hand, “Kylo?” For some reason she was whispering, she rolled her eyes at herself and tried again, “Kylo? You need to wake up, just for a bit.”

There wasn’t any response, _ <Kylo? You need to wake up,> _ he stirred slightly at that and she gave him a little shake, _ <Come on Kylo, just wake up so we can put you on the plane.> _

At that she felt him grip her hand as he began to surface, panic fluttering at the edges of his consciousness as he rose.

His eyes snapped open and he sat up, swaying slightly as he did, “You can’t get on the plane! It isn’t safe!”

Leia stuck her head into the Falcon, “It’s fine, _Kylo_ ,” she grimaced at the use of his other name but carried on, “We found the devices, it is quite safe now.”

Kylo looked unconvinced, “We should do a sweep, just to be sure,” he said, looking at Rey, then his expression softened, “Are you okay?”

Rey gave him a reassuring smile, “I’m fine. Come on, let’s get you on the plane.”

Kylo huffed a sigh but got out, still wobbly legged, Ingalan and Zainmar arrived to support him, _ <You aren’t coming?> _he asked her confusedly as they started off.

 _ <I’m just going to get changed, then I’ll be there. Promise,> _she replied as she went to gather her things and use the Falcon as a screen now the boys had moved on.

Rey changed quickly, ridiculously happy to be back in her comfort zone, she even pulled her hair up, though only in one bun as it was now shorter than it had been. The dye Dama had coloured her hair with was temporary, and after one or two washes, she’d be back to her normal chestnut. She had no idea how the make up had fared with all that had happened, probably badly, but there was no mirror and frankly as this point, _she really didn’t care._

Once she was done, she recovered her knives and any other weapons of hers the boys had brought with them, and concealed them about her person and rolled up in her discarded clothes. She really hope Leia or Luke didn’t check her for them, hopefully if she gave up her gun when they asked for it, they’d be satisfied… perhaps one or two knives too. What she could _not_ find, was her tool kit. Rey frowned, she loved that tool kit, it had been one of the few things that was hers and hers alone in Jakku.

She stuffed the roll of clothes in the plastic bag her original ones had been in and made her way towards the plane.

“You all set, kiddo?” Han asked her as she got to the back of the plane. Rather than doors the back of the plane was open, presumably it had been for loading cargo when needed.

“Almost, I had a tool kit in the Falcon, you don’t know where it is, do you?”

“Ah, yeah. We borrowed them for the IED, I think Luke has them, he’s already on the plane.”

Rey nodded and started towards the hold entrance when Chewie padded over and rubbed his head on her thigh, “Hey, beautiful,” she said, as she automatically knelt so she could wrap her arms around him.

Chewie laid a long lick along her ear and grumbled happily at her, as she hugged him she felt a slight trembling in his body and she frowned, leaning away so she could look him in the eyes. “Han, has anyone checked him for injuries?”

Han was immediately on the ground with her, “ _Shit_ , no. Chewie, you got any problems?”

The huge dog looked slightly embarrassed, he glanced away from them and grumbled a whine.

Han huffed in annoyance, “You idiot, you need to tell me these things, come on, let us have a look, you daft lummox.”

Chewie curled his lip, possibly in response to Han’s insults; really, he seemed to understand humans perfectly well, but he stood, grudgingly presenting his back end to them.

Han turned on a torch and he and Rey had a good look, there was a bullet wound, a deep score in the meat of Chewie’s rump, the bullet hadn’t gone in but the wound was still nasty and could have festered. Han cursed under his breath.

“It’s okay, I can fix it. We just need to clean it,” Rey told Han to reassure him, Chewie did not seem too bothered by it, “Antiseptic or alcohol should do it.”

Han grunted and stood, “ _You_ ” he said, glaring at Chewie, “Stay _right there._ I’ll be back in a second Rey,” and he hurried off.

Chewie gave Rey a rather accusatory look. Rey rubbed his chin, “Sorry big guy, but if we hadn’t found it, you could have gotten really sick, and who would look after Han?”

Chewie grinned at that, stretching out his neck so Rey could rub his jawbone.

Han was back quickly with antiseptic and a sterile pad. Rey held Chewies head as Han cleaned the wound. He let out a series of snarling whines, but she knew he wouldn’t hurt her and just kept stroked his chin and shoulders, murmuring nonsense in his large ears while she did.

“Well, it’s as clean as it’s gonna get,” Han said, “You sure you’re okay to do this, kid? You were out cold not long ago.”

There was no way in hell Rey was not going to heal Chewie, even if she did feel like she’d been run over by a mac truck, “I’ll be fine. It’s not deep and its in muscle, no large veins or anything.”

Han moved aside so Rey could place her hands near the wound while he moved to Chewie’s head to take up fussing him.

Rey breathed in, shutting her eyes and calming her mind, connecting to the Force. As gently as she could, she pushed it into Chewie, directing it to knit muscle and skin and repair any broken capillaries. She was vaguely aware that Chewie whined a little, but nothing to indicate she was doing anything wrong.

Once she was done, she opened her eyes and sat down, hard. She wasn’t going to pass out, but her legs probably wouldn’t be reliable right now. “All done,” _light,_ ever her voice sounded weak.

Rey was rewarded by a loving lick up her cheek and a happy, wet nosed huff in her ear, she couldn’t help smiling, “You’re welcome. Any time. In fact, next time, you come straight to me, okay?” Chewie snorted and grinned, tail flapping against the floor.

“Okay, let’s get you on the plane, kiddo,” Han hauled her to her feet and placed an arm around her, “Thanks,” he told her gruffly as he helped walk, “He’s a furry idiot, but he is part of the family.”

Rey nodded wearily, but smiled, “Like I said, anytime.”

 

Inside the plane, the set up was basic; clearly it had been used previously for cargo transport or short-haul movements of marines or even paratroopers.

There were fold down benches attached to the sides of the large space, with rigging to hook yourself into if the ramp needed to be lowered whilst the plane was still in the air.

Kylo was on the floor, already sound asleep, wrapped in a blanket and surrounded by the Knights. Finn and Poe sat a little way away from them, and Hux was a good way away from everyone, on his own.

His cold eyes watched Rey carefully as she and Han made their way up the ramp, _just what was his deal?_

Her moment of inattention was rewarded by a stumble, but Han caught her before she hit the deck.

Leia hurriedly made her way down the plane to take Rey’s arm, she glared up at Han, “I thought you said it wasn’t a bad wound? She’s exhausted!”

Rey blushed furiously, “I’m fine, honestly, just tired,” she said before Han could respond. The last thing she wanted was to cause an argument.

Leia made a vexed sound and Han grunted, but neither responded as they helped Rey over to the spot between the Knights and Finn and Poe.

Rey fell rather than sat down, her legs just folding beneath her, catching her and the adults by surprise.

Chewie, who had followed them onto the plane, collapsed beside her, laying his head on her thigh with a happy groan.

His contentment was short lived, however, “Sorry, Chew, but they need to leave and we need to get on the road. Say goodbye now, and get along with you.”

Han disappeared into the cabin at the front, ostensibly to say goodbye to Luke, but it was obvious it was to avoid Leia. It didn’t work, after patting Rey absently on the shoulder, Leia stalked after him, shutting the door behind her.

Rey and Chewie looked at each other and Chewie rolled his eyes. Rey huffed a laugh at his expression and rubbed his chin. He accepted the fuss for a few seconds before he got up, laid loving lick along her nose and a huff in her ear, before padding over to give the sleeping Kylo the same treatment.

As soon as he departed Finn shuffled over to her and pulled her against him, “You okay there, Peanut?”

Rey sighed and snuggled against him while Poe draped a blanket over her and settled on her otherside.

“Yeah, just worn out,” she paused as a yawn cracked her jaws and she ducked her head, “You guys okay?”

Finn chuckled, “Yeah, we’re good. Weirdly looking forward to going back to school.”

Poe nodded, “Mainly for the beds and food, plus the not being shot at is always nice too.”

Rey winced, if it wasn’t for her _weakness_ in the first place, they never would have even considered being shot at as something to worry about. She fervently hoped that her instructions to the Fett’s were effective. That was one of the only ways she could make up for her mistakes - making sure no one came back to school for her, _ever again_ … because if this didn’t work, she’d have to leave. She’d have to run away, mute the bond and disappear. She still had no idea what their end game had been, _or was_ ... and if there was a next time, there was _no way_ she would let anyone else suffer the consequences of her problems…

Rey was pulled out of her thoughts by Finn gently brushing some loose wisps of hair out of her face, “Hey,” he said softly, “You look like you need to sleep. So do it. I promise to wake you if anything comes up, okay?”

Rey wasn’t quite ready to sleep yet, but she was ready to be alone with her thoughts, ready to not have to make conversation, so she nodded sleepily and settled herself more comfortably before closing her eyes…

It would take the twins about two days to get back to Tatooine, give or take. She wasn’t sure how quickly it would take them to get back to Canto Bight on the plane… But Hux had had that mysterious contact, who would presumably know if anything went down in Tatooine. She suppressed a grimace, she may end up having to talk to Hux… although, she and/or Kylo really did need to have a look in his head. Rey wanted answers, preferably _before_ they got back to school… Rey repressed a sigh, perhaps she should sleep after all. If she wanted inside Hux’s head, she needed to have the energy to do it.

She shifted slightly against Finn, and curled her fist around the hilt of her favourite knife underneath the blanket. With that comfort, she surrendered to sleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this happened, much sooner than I thought it would. Hurrah for insomnia, it was actually useful for once! And for all your comments, they really did act as a spur ♥ … Chapter title is rubbish, but nothing more suitable came to me.


	91. Tête-à-tête

 

Rey wasn’t sure what woke her. The few windows in the hold were still dark so she could not have been asleep for too long.

She sat up carefully so as not not to wake Finn and Poe who were asleep next to her, then peered around the rest of the hold space.

The only light came from small lights along the sides, spaced a few feet apart. The bond indicated Kylo was still sounds asleep and everyone else seemed to be too… apart from Hux.

He was busy looking at his phone, the light from the screen making his eyes gleam in the dim light.

Despite only having slept a few hours, Rey didn’t feel too bad; perhaps now would be a good time for she and Hux to have a little chat.

As Rey stood up and quietly made her way away from Finn and Poe, Hux looked up, for a moment there was a flicker of surprise on his face before it went carefully blank as he watched her approach.

There was no sign of Leia and Rey assumed that she was in the cockpit with Luke; this may be her only opportunity to grill Hux before they got back to school.

Hux raised one eyebrow at her as she sat down facing to him, her knees mere inches from his,

“To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Rey gazed back at him steadily, “I think it’s time you cut the bullshit and explain a few things.”

Hux’s eyes flared, but his face stayed almost inscrutable as he said softly, “On your own? _Without Ren_?” He leaned forwards, his eyes searching hers, “Like for like, Scavenger scum, you have your own explaining to do.”

Rey willed her face to stay still and kept it where it was, despite Hux’s proximity, “Really? After everything that’s happened in the last week, you think you can intimidate me?”

Hux sat back again, slipping his phone into his pocket as he shrugged, “I simply find it interesting that you’ve approached me on your own.”

They studied each other for a moment, his pale eyes locked with her hazel, neither of them willing to look away first.

“Why did you join Kylo and the others?” Rey asked after several moments, still not breaking eye contact.

There was another pause, then, “I went with them because they probably would have failed without me.”

Rey pushed her irritation down and prepared herself for what was probably going to be a frustrating and vexing conversation, “But why did you care if they failed or not?”

“Oh, no, Scavenger, this in an exchange remember?” he answered with a smirk, “It’s my turn now,” his expression became intense, “Did you really know the peanuts would kill me?”

Rey blinked, she had expected him to ask about she and Kylo, about their connection and abilities, she opened her mouth to reply then shut it again and cocked her head. There was a spark of cunning, hidden deep within his eyes and the merest warning prickle tingled over the back of her neck, “Before I answer that, you need to show me your phone.”

Hux’s eyes tightened, “And why would I do that?”

Rey tried gently but firmly brushed his mind, the last time she had tried this she had found his mind almost empty, so this time, she dug deeper, though still as delicately as she could. There was the tiniest hint of his stratagem, and she gave him a small smile, “So I know you aren’t recording this conversation, of course.”

Hux sneered,  “Why on earth would I be doing that?”

Rey shrugged, “I can think of quite a few reasons.”

Hux’s lips thinned, and he leaned back against the metal of the plane, “There is no way you are getting hold of my phone. It’s private.”

This clearly wasn’t going to work. “Okay then,” and she grabbed hold of his right with hers. It was pale and cold in her grasp and made her flesh creep slightly.

Hux’s first reaction was to try and pull his hand away but then he smirked and leaned towards her once more as he said silkily, “If you just wanted to hold my hand, all you had to do was ask.”

Rey snorted softly, then yanked his arm to her right side, as his torso moved down at an angle she wrapped her left arm around his neck and moved her head down to his shoulder as she gripped the back of hers and applied pressure, capturing him in a one armed choke hold.

She bore down on his bent back with all her weight, making Hux gasp as he tried to shift her. Rey applied more pressure, “Stay still or you will blackout.”

Being so close to him was disturbing. She could smell his skin and hair, the position felt horribly intimate. His struggling stilled, Rey lessened the pressure minutely, “Continue to stay still and this will be over quickly, I promise.”

With that, she pushed her way into Hux’s mind. But she hit a wall almost immediately. It was odd, she could access his surface thoughts to some degree, the hints of trivial memories and emotions, but anything else was behind what seemed to be a smooth, impenetrable wall.

As she sifted through what little she could access, she became aware that he was actually enjoying their current position and she felt her lip curl in disgust even as her cheeks flushed.

Rey was honestly surprised to find he really did want her, that it hadn’t been just the need to put her in her place, to dominate her and get her back for all her perceived insults… but she couldn’t believe he had come to Tatooine with the others just because he fancied her. No, that and everything else she wanted, needed, to know, was locked up behind that seemingly impregnable barrier.

And try as she might, she wasn’t getting through it. It was possible that Kylo would be able to get through it, but one of the reasons she had tried this on her own first, was she wasn’t certain what they would find in here. She didn’t know what Kylo had seen in the Fett’s head, but she had a feeling Hux’s head may contain thoughts that would trigger his fury too and she had hoped to avoid that.

_Would mind tricking Hux still work with that wall inside his head?_ And more importantly, though something she was unlikely to get an answer to, _how was he doing it?_ _How was he able to wall up so much… and had he done it because he had suspected she or Kylo would try and look? …Blood and bloody ashes, did Hux have the Force too?_

The idea seemed inconceivable, and every instinct in her told her that was impossible, but if that were so, _how was he able to make that wall?_

Rey mentally shook herself, _one thing at a time_ , for now, it was time to find out if the mind trick worked. She breathed out, letting her mind calm and become focused.

“You will remember nothing of being healed by us,” she pushed her the Force and her will into her words as she spoke them into Hux’s ear, layering as much command as she could.

“I will remember nothing of being healed by you,” Hux’s tone was free or it’s habitual arrogance.

_So, this seemed to be working_ … without knowing for certain what Hux was aware of, Rey wasn’t sure what else to tell him. After a few moments of thought, she added, “You will forget witnessing any strange abilities from Kylo Ren and I.”

“I will forget witnessing any strange abilities from Kylo Ren and you.”

“You will give me your phone, and forget the last ten minutes,” Rey released her hold, moving back to sit in front of Hux.

“I will give you my phone, and forget the last ten minutes,” he said and handed his phone over.

Rey pocketed it quickly as Hux blinked and took several deeps breaths.

“Well, if you won’t tell me why you went with the others, I’ll leave you to it,” she said before he could ask her why she was there. She wasn’t a hundred percent sure on how much time had passed and wanted to divert him from wondering about it himself.

She went to gather her feet under her but was surprised by his hand on her knee, “You can’t expect me to give you all my answers in exchange for nothing.”

Rey pushed his hand off her knee then shrugged, “I guess not.”

“So, we are at an impasse then… but seeing as you and I are the only ones awake, why don’t you stay and we talk about something else?”

“Why on earth would you think I’d do that? You may have helped us, but that does not make us friends.”

“Acquaintances then?”

Rey shook her head disbelief, “Hux… You _assaulted_ me. On several occasions,” she leaned towards him as she glared into his eyes, “You conspired with Ismasta _to rape me_. We will only ever be enemies.”

Hux’s eyes darted away from hers, almost guilitly, “And almost killing me and my helping rescue you counts for nothing, does it?”

Rey almost laughed, “Your help is why I will not try to kill you again.”

Hux looked up at her, then away again saying quietly, “I don’t know why I did it.”

Rey frowned, unsure she had heard him correctly, “Don’t know why you did what?”

His mouth turned down and he shifted uncomfortably, “I don’t know why I did that with Ismasta.”  
Rey folded her arms as she felt white anger flare in her chest, with an effort she brought it under control, “It wasn’t a spur of the moment thing, Hux. It was _planned_. Do not try and bullshit me further, it won’t end well for you.”

His jaw clenched, any flicker of guilt disappearing, “ _Fine_ ,” he snarled, back to his old self, angry and sneering once more.

Rey got to her feet and walked away from him, her skin prickling with anger and a little perplexity. Hux may be an evil shit weasel but he wasn’t stupid, _so what had he hoped to achieve with that odd statement?_

Rey shook her head, now was not the time; she needed to look at Hux’s phone and delete anything that needed it before he realised he didn’t have it anymore. _Maybe she should have told him to forget he had it?_ Too late now.

She sat down next to where Finn was still sleeping and shook him gently. She didn’t know a huge amount about phones and his scholarship at Canto Bight was for IT, so hopefully he’d have more of an idea what he was doing.

He grunted and batted at her hand and Rey couldn’t help smiling to herself, “Finn, wake up,” her whisper caused him to grunt again, but she had to shake him several times before he came awake.

“Peanut? What’s wrong?” he asked blearily as he finally focussed on her face.

Rey pushed her guilt at waking him down, as she whispered, “I need your help. I got hold of Hux’s phone and was hoping you’d help me make sure there is nothing on it that there shouldn’t be.”

Finn blinked owlishly at her, processing what she’d said, then nodded and sat up, “Okay, let’s see it.”

Rey handed the phone over to him and it wasn’t long before he found several recorded conversations, (including the one she and Hux had just had) and some notes detailing the journey from Canto Bight and his observations, where he mentioned she and Kylo’s healing as well as them being able to communicate somehow, probably telepathically, and having premonitions.   

The email and text inbox on the phone were empty, as were the contacts. The call logs had been deleted, and although Finn searched, he couldn’t restore any of them.

Once he found anything revealing, he deleted it, making sure it was truly gone before moving on to the next thing.

Finn was very thorough and by the time he was done Rey could see dawn light in the small windows of the hold. She yawned and Finn copied her.

“All done, I think. You’ll have to tell me how you got hold of it later though, I am going back to sleep,” he looked at her, “You should too, Peanut. You looked exhausted.”

Rey just nodded, a quick glance at the Knights showed her there wasn’t any space to join Kylo, plus with Leia and Luke being here, that would be kind of weird. So she and Finn curled up together, up until then, she hadn’t realised just how cold she was, and she was grateful for his warmth and Poe’s on her other side.

The warmth lulled her quickly into sleep, Finn’s soft snores making her smile as she did.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is horribly late, I apologise profusely… Also, been without a beta for quite a while now and after rereading some of this, it really shows. So, please do point out any mistakes/anomalies you see, I’d appreciate it.
> 
> We are almost at the end of this arch, and I’d love your feedback on a few things...
> 
> 1\. This started as a collection of vague thoughts and turned into a whole thing with plot and stuff. So… Should I end this fic here and start a new one for the next arch? Looking back I couldn’t decide on a good place to end the first arch so parts 1 and 2 are lumped together. (If you think there would be a good place to say _Part Two_ let me know). 
> 
> 2\. Are there any tags you think I should add? (I haven’t added the use of the Force or Force bond as I like it being a surprise, do you disagree?)
> 
> 3\. What do you want to see in the last part? Obviously things will get resolved, but is there anything else you kinda fancy?  
> You can comment here, send me a private message on [Fanfiction.net](https://www.fanfiction.net/~amberdread) ,message me on [Pinterest](https://www.pinterest.co.uk/AmberDDread/) or if you have discord, I’m Amber Dread#8988
> 
> Thanks so much for all the comments, Kudos and bookmarks, and to all you’ve made it this far. ♥ I’ve been in and out of hospital recently, so the updates are really slow, but don’t worry, I won’t be abandoning this... Kylo POV next chapter.


	92. Refuel

 

Kylo surfaced from sleep gradually; it had been the sort of deep rest that leaves you feeling a little drunk and disorientated, so it took him a while to realise that they were in the plane and obviously in the air. Once he thought about it he vaguely remembered leaving the Falcon and entering the plane but it was a vague memory, viewed through the fog of exhaustion.

Someone shifted next to him, “You awake, Kylo?” came Ingalan’s soft voice.

Kylo nodded, unwilling to move much yet, “Just,” he answered as he turned slightly looking around for Rey. She wasn’t next to him. He frowned and sat up, for a moment slightly dizzy with a headrush. 

“Rey is still asleep,” Poe told him with a crooked smile. He and the Knights were sitting quietly playing cards, not far off Kylo could see Rey and Finn, curled up together beneath a blanket. He frowned, a thread of jealousy sparking inside him, why hadn’t she joined _ him _ ?

Ingalan passed him a bottle of water and he drank gratefully, wincing slightly at how cold it was, before getting to his feet and wandering down the hold to the loo. He passed Hux on his way, who was also still asleep... it was strange, having Hux around and vulnerable but not doing anything to him. Their enmity had been mostly on hold since they left Canto Bight, but with their return so close, he wondered whether they would slip so easily back into their old roles, or if this too, was something that was irrevocable changed.... On second thoughts though, he was pretty sure Hux would always be a dick, and he had done some things that were simply unforgivable, even if he had proved useful in Rey’s rescue and escape.

On his return to where the others sat, he found food and paper plates set out and suddenly realised he was starving,  _ and _ chilly. He grabbed his hoody from his bag and pulled it on.

“Leia brought this out,” Ingalan said, “There isn’t much, but we’re going to be landing in an hour to refuel and get more food, as most of it was ruined when the people carrier was t-boned.”

“Shouldn’t we wake the others to eat?” Kylo asked - if Rey was still asleep it meant she needed it, but on the other hand she’d need to be awake to strap in for landing anyway.

Poe stood, “Probably a good idea.. But who wants the dubious honour of waking Hux?”

They all looked over at where Hux lay, propped up against the metal wall of the hold, pale face devoid, for once, of its habitual sneer of superiority.

“I’ll do it,” Zainmar said, grinning mischievously.

Ingalan rolled his eyes and quickly stood before the other boy could, “ _ I’ll _ do it.”

Zainmar pouted but turned his attention back to cards without any compliant and Kylo and Poe went to wake Rey and Finn.

“Why’d she end up sleeping here?” Kylo asked Poe softly, figuring he may feel a little of the jealousy that Kylo felt.

Poe just smiled fondly down at the two of them, apparently unconcerned, “That was as far as she got, Chewie was injured and she sorted him out before she got on the plane. Think it wore her out.”

“But Chewie was okay?” Kylo asked worriedly.

Poe chuckled, “Yeah, the mutt was fine. Rey is good at… whatever it is she does.”

They both knelt to shake their respective partners, Finn woke fairly quickly but Kylo was alarmed to find that even shaking Rey firmly hardly stirred her.  _ <Rey?> _ No response. 

He laid his hand on her cheek, she wasn’t even dreaming, the darkness in her mind was absolute; he turned to Poe and Finn, who was now sitting up rubbing his eyes.

“Was it just Chewie she healed? Was there anything else? I can’t wake her.”   
Poe frowned, “Just Chewie I think,” he said slowly.

Finn shook his head, “She woke me up, after everyone was asleep,” he lowered his voice, “She’d somehow got hold of Hux’s phone and we went through and deleted some stuff we didn’t think should stay on it.”

“Got hold of it  _ how _ ?” Kylo asked suspiciously as he pulled the blanket down and checked Rey in case she had any bruises,  _ just to be sure.  _

Finn shrugged, “No idea. We were too tired to talk about it and she said she’d tell me later.”

“Did you replace the phone once you were done?” Poe asked, voice also low as he flickered his eyes over to where Hux had just stood up.

Finn shook his head again and pulled the phone out of his pocket, “Didn’t get round to it. It’s clean now though. He’s got nothing.”

Kylo chewed his lip as he watched Rey’s sleeping face and thought; it was highly improbable that Hux had willingly given her his phone, and if he hadn’t pitched a fit over her taking it, that meant she had either taken it off him in his sleep,  _ or _ she had used the mind trick… and if she had used the mind trick, she may also have had a look in his head. Considering her obvious exhaustion, she must have used her abilities... at least,  _ he hoped so _ , otherwise he had no idea why she’d be so worn out.

He sighed and covered her back up with the blanket, “I guess we’ll let her sleep it off. If she isn’t awake when we go to land we’ll just have to strap her in as she is.”

“What do we do about Hux’s phone?” Finn asked quietly.

Poe held out his hand, “Give it to me, I need the loo and I’ll just say I found it lying on the floor on my way back. If he buys it, he buys it, if not,” he shrugged.

“That’ll do,” Kylo said as he stood, then picked Rey up and carried her back with him to where everyone was eating, he didn’t want to leave her on her own, in case this was something more than just fatigue, and it really was cold. She barely stirred when he sat down and carefully tucked her in next to him.

Hux raised his eyebrow, “Must you manhandle the scavenger all the time, Ren?”

Kylo glared at him, “I want to keep an eye on her to make sure she’s okay, we can’t wake her up.”

Hux shot him an infuriating smirk, “Oh, she’s probably just worn out after spending time with me last night,  _ when you were all asleep _ .”

As Kylo had already surmised this, it didn’t quite enrage him as much as Hux had clearly hoped, he took a few careful breaths before shrugging as casually as he could, “Perhaps.”

The Knights, who had all been scowling at Hux, looked at Kylo in surprise, he gave them an almost imperceptible nod and they went back to eating and ignoring Hux, knowing he’d explain later.

“We should have left him somewhere,” Finn muttered under his breath.

Kylo nodded, “An unfortunate oversight.”

“Guess Master Luke and Mrs. Organa wouldn’t let us leave him when we stop for fuel?”

Kylo smirked, it probably wasn’t as unlikely as Finn thought it was, he wouldn’t be surprised if his mother hadn’t thought about it, but he just answered, “I doubt it.”

Poe returned and sat down with Finn, “Hux, isn’t this your phone?” he asked, holding it out to the other boy, “It was back there on the floor.”

Hux frowned, “It is,” he took it and turned it over in his hands before checking it, it wasn’t long before he noticed whatever Finn had deleted was gone. He looked up, eyes furious and colour high in his cheeks, “And when you found this,  _ Dameron, _ did you happen to ‘ _ accidentally _ ’ wipe it too?” he spat. 

Poe shrugged, “It was like that when I picked it up,” he said truthfully.

Hux’s eyes swept over the others before they came to rest on Rey, “Of course,  _ the scavenger. _ I should have known. Wake her up, she needs to answer some questions.”

Kylo raised his eyebrows, “She’ll wake up when she’s ready.”

“If you are incapable of waking her up,  _ I’ll do it _ ,” Hux snapped as he moved towards them.

Instantly the Knights moved in front of him, baring his way, “You don’t get to touch her,” Ingalan said coolly.

“You don’t  _ ever _ get to touch her,” Kylo revised.

Hux’s eyes flashed, “We’ll see,” he replied quietly with an edge to his voice, then picked up his food and went back to sit on his own.

The Knights sat back down, “What the hell did that mean?” Zainmar asked.

Kylo sighed, pushing down his desire to go and make Hux explain his last remark, _ for now, _ “With Hux? If could mean anything.”

“It’ was probably just to get under your skin, Kylo,” Ingalan said.

Kylo grimaced, “I’ve assumed that before, and lived to regret it.”

They were quiet for a little while, everyone mulling this over, then Javiell glanced over at Hux to check he was far enough away before saying, “So, what  _ was  _ she doing with him earlier then?”

“I can’t be certain, as no one else was awake,” Kylo gestured to Finn who had his mouth full, “But she woke up Finn and got him to wipe Hux’s phone, and as Hux doesn’t seem to remember giving it to her, I guess she mind tricked him, which is why she’s so out of it now.”

“But why would she do that on her own?” Leonmar asked, puzzled.

Kylo shook his head unhappily, “I’ll be asking her that when she wakes.”

“Maybe she did it because she was worried you’d lose your shit looking in  _ his _ head?” Finn said after swallowing, “It can’t be pleasant in there.”

“That’s a good point, you lost it in a big way after looking in the Fett’s heads after the crash... what did you see in there?” Leonmar asked.

“And what did Rey do to them that had Leia spitting feathers?” Zainmar added.

Kylo swallowed and took a drink of water to cool the burn of bile in his throat before he answered, “I am never,  _ ever _ , going to explain to anyone, what I saw in the head of the twin I looked in,” he couldn’t help shuddering as he pushed down the memory, “If I could get it erased, I would.”

“Well shit,” Zainmar said weakly.

“Couldn’t Rey erase it for you?” Javiell asked.

Kylo shook his head, “I don’t want her accidentally seeing anything… they made Hux look like the patron saint of kittens or something,” he glanced at Poe and Finn but decided at this point, they could be trusted, “She mind tricked the Fett’s into going back to Tatooine to assassinate Jabba, if it works like it should, they’ll probably get killed in the aftermath and no one will be left to come back to Canto Bight after us.”

There was a stunned silence, everyone’s wide eyes were on he and Rey. She looked so small and innocent, curled up tightly as she breathed softly next to him. Looking at her as she was, no one would believe her capable of half the things she had done. It still awed him, how something so small and fragile could be so strong, so determined and so capable…  _ and so bloody stubborn.  _

“Obviously, don’t tell anyone this. We don’t know if it will work, or if it does, whether it will pan out like we hope it will. Guess we’ll find out soon enough.”

“It’s bloody brilliant,” Javiell said with a feral grin.

“And this would mean she’s safe?” Finn asked as he looked down at Rey’s face, “It hadn’t even occurred to me that they could come back for her.”

Kylo didn’t like to admit it, but he hadn’t thought of it either - getting home in one piece had been the goal. In his mind, home was a safe place - but that was wrong, she had been kidnapped from there, after all. He shrugged, “I think if it works she’ll be safe. We should know in a few days or so. A high profile death like that should be widely reported.”

“But isn’t there still the question of who wanted her kidnapped in the first place? It wasn’t Jabba was it?” Poe asked, brow wrinkled in thought.

Kylo sighed, for a brief time, he had  _ forgotten _ that, it had been blissful. “There’s still that,” he agreed heavily, “We don’t have any idea who it was or why.”

“Fuck,” Leonmar said and the others nodded grimly, “I wish there was a way we could just move her into your room, Kylo. She isn’t safe on her own like that.”

Even Zainmar wasn’t in the mood to make a suggestive comment to that.

“Her instincts are good, unless drained like she is now… at least I hope that’s all it is,” Kylo paused to try shaking her again, this time she mummured a little and moved her head, curling more tightly into herself. Well, hopefully that meant she would wake soon.

“We’ll just have to make sure she is with someone at all times and if necessary cuff her to the bed at night,” Ingalan said, “It would be probably be best if she came over the roof and slept in your room, rather than you in hers - then we’ll be near if the need arises.”

Kylo couldn’t help smiling as he felt a wave of affection for his brothers calm assumption that they would help him protect her,  _ even _ if she didn’t want it.

Finn’s eyebrows had climbed into his hair, “Is that a regular occurrence then?”

Poe put his arm around his boyfriend with a small smile, “Are you really surprised?”

Finn rolled his eyes but smiled back, “I really shouldn’t be.”

The mood seemed to lift, as if their resolution to carry on keeping Rey safe, somehow made the possible danger less daunting. 

 

Rey finally woke as Kylo strapped her in for landing. She’d only stirred slightly as he lifted her onto the bench, but as soon as he tightened the harness on her, she started struggling.

“Rey!” she didn’t seem to register his voice, clearly still half asleep,  _ <Rey! It’s me, we’re about to land.> _

After a few seconds she calmed, eyes fluttering open, “Kylo?” she sat up properly and he settled in the seat next to her and attended to his own straps. “Are we home? How long was I asleep?” her voice was still languid with sleep as she stretched as much as she could in the harness.

Kylo felt himself relax a little, relieved she was okay, “Not home, we’re stopping to refuel and Luke needs a break to rest as there isn’t another pilot.” 

He smiled as she took his hand and peered around at the others, her eyes fell on Hux and her lips curved slightly before she looked away,  _ <Did Finn tell you we wiped Hux’s phone?> _

Kylo’s grip on her hand tightened and he gave her a level look,  _ <Yes. He did. It’s good it’s done, but next time, don’t do that alone please.> _

She merely rolled her eyes at him,  _ <It was a good opportunity and it worked out fine… though, his mind isn’t normal, there’s something wrong with it.> _

He snorted,  _ <Of course it isn’t normal, this is Hux we’re talking about.> _

Rey rolled her eyes at him,  _ <No, I mean, there was a wall. A barrier  of some sort which I couldn’t get through... I couldn’t break through it so I couldn’t search his head, I barely even picked up surface thoughts. It was weird and I have no idea what it means… I wiped him of any memories of being healed and our abilities, then got him to give me his phone and forget what had just happened… I think it worked, but the way his mind was different made me less confident.> _

Kylo realised his was frowning and smoothed his face,  _ <That is… disturbing.> _

_ <Yup. We need to keep an eye on him, even when we’re back home. Something about him isn’t right and its suspicious.> _

The bottom fell out of his stomach as the plane lost altitude and he could feel Rey was getting nauseous too.

Everyone was quiet as they landed, sitting sideways and not being able to look out of a window seemed to be making everyone feel uncomfortable.

 

“You can unstrap now,” Leia said as she left the cockpit, “We’re at a small airfield, you may get out briefly to stretch your legs, but do not go more than fifteen feet away, is that clear?” everyone nodded and she carried on, “I am going to organise the refueling and pick up some food, Master Luke is asleep in the cockpit,  _ do not _ wake him, unless it is an emergency,” she took them all in with a firm, no nonsense look, then moved down the hold, stopping to hit the button to lower the loading ramp.

Everyone got up slowly and made their way outside, happy to have solid ground beneath their feet again.

Kylo watched as Rey oriented herself and raised her face to the sun with a happy sigh, “Do you miss Jakku?”

She shrugged, eyes closed and face stilled raised, “In some ways, yes. I was made for sun and sand and wide open spaces.”

Leonmar laughed, “You are not going to like the winter in Canto Bight then.”

Rey smiled, “Perhaps not, but I like the food and hot water,” she shrugged “Swings and roundabouts. I’m sure I’ll survive.”

Kylo stood behind her, resting his chin on her shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her, “I hope the company counts for something too.”

“It does,” she answered with an impish tone to her voice, “I don’t know what I’d do without Finn.”

Finn chortled from a few feet away, “You and me both, Peanut.”

“Just Finn?” Kylo asked as he started softly kissing her neck, she wriggled against him but he held firm, “No one else?”

“Okay you two, get a room,” Zainmar called from somewhere behind them.

_ <Quit it!> _ Rey’s sending was a satisfying mix of embarrassment and desire.  

Kylo grinned against her skin as she made an involuntary noise of pleasure, “If you don’t like it, don’t watch, Zain,” he said absently, then nibbled Rey’s earlobe, ignoring the others as they moved away slightly.

_ <You’re being mean! Your mother could come back any moment!> _

_ <She could> _ he agreed easily, kissing along her jaw.

_ <Ugh! Do you really need me to say it?> _ Rey was trying for irritation but her amusement bled through.   

_ <Of course I don’t, but you’re so delicious to wind up, little scavenger,> _ her indignation at that made him laugh and he stepped away just in time to avoid getting an elbow in the gut.

Rey whirled to face him, a blush colouring her cheeks, “You just wait till we are somewhere where I can kick your arse,  _ shark boy. _ ”

Kylo just grinned even more, “I look forward to watching you fail.”

Rey growled and flung herself at him, he caught her and met her lips with his, hungry and insistent, and for a short time, the world fell away.

 

 


	93. A Bad Connection

Their downtime in Anzat by went slowly, not being able to go far from the plane and keeping quiet so Luke could sleep, left them with little else but cards, chatting or napping.

Before Leia returned, Rey persuaded the others to hide some of the knives and other weapons they had taken from her room about their persons, hoping they wouldn’t be searched too thoroughly and she would be able to keep them.

She picked a few to give up, as no doubt they would be asked to give up their guns, and she may need a token offering to avoid a larger loss. Javiell insisted they keep one of the guns back, just in case they needed it, seeing as they had at no point had they quantified how many weapons they had to the adults, they hoped to slide just one by. They planned to keep their comms too, hoping they wouldn't be considered a problem, and again, they may come in handy, even if it were just for playing manhunt. 

Leonmar and Hux were antsy, having been unable to smoke since they’d met up with the adults, although Luke was asleep and Leia was away, smoking next to a refueling plane seemed like a very bad idea.

Rey was feeling rather restless herself and card games bored her so she wandered around the plane, the mechanic in her excited to view one so close up. After she’d exhausted her curiosity, well, exhausted it without actually being allowed to open the plane up and see exactly how things worked, she settled herself down in a patch of sunshine, closed her eyes and just drifted.

The airfield they were in wasn’t busy and she was easily able to tune out what noise there was. After a while she reached out and touched the Force, not intending to do anything with it, just to feel it, to try and understand it better.

The connection bloomed in her mind, cool yet somehow warm, golden and vital, linking everything that lived and died, together,  _ balanced _ . A wave of peace flowed through her as she extended herself further…  _ something _ else was there, beneath it all... it was cold and dark and she could feel it calling for her, as if it were trying to show her something important…

_ <Rey!> _

Rey’s eyes flew open, surprised to find Kylo on his knees, face frightened as he shook her arms, “What?”

“What do you mean what? What were you _ doing? _ ”

Rey frowned, noticing Luke and Leia standing behind Kylo, and behind him everyone else, she felt her cheeks heat under the sudden scrutiny, “I was just meditating.”

“So why didn’t you respond when I shouted in your face?” Kylo’s voice was harsh with worry, his fingers gripping her shoulders was bruising, the bond was frantic, agitated and crackling.

“Perhaps everyone else should go inside,” Luke said, tone mild but a little forced. 

Rey lost sight of the others as Kylo crushed her against his chest, “Really” she gasped, “What’s wrong with meditating?”

There was a rumble of a frustrated growl deep in his chest, “You did  _ something, _ I could feel it, it was so bad it woke Luke up and brought Leia and I running out here. And I couldn't get through to you, you were just sitting there, like you were made of stone.”

“You were doing something more than meditating, Rey,” Luke added as he knelt to join them on the ground.

Leia pressed her hand to Luke’s shoulder, “I’ll watch the boys,” and she moved away towards to the back of the plane.

Rey shrugged, “I was just meditating and feeling the Force, getting to know it better, that was all.”

“For a second, there was a blast of darkness, that seemed to come from you,” Luke said. Rey had absolutely no idea what that meant.

“The bond suddenly went cold, and you couldn't hear me,” Kylo added letting her pull away from him slightly.  

“It was trying to show me something, I don’t know what… But I am fine, honestly.”

Luke sighed and rubbed his beard, “We know so little about any of this, and you and Ben’s abilities far outstrip mine and Leia’s. You must be  _ careful,  _ the powers you have are not toys, not cheap parlour tricks… perhaps you and Ben should try and work at controlling them once you have settled in back at school. Perhaps in the gym in the evening,  I do not know much, but I can supervise you at least.”

“And maybe don’t try anything when you’re alone,  _ especially _ without telling me,” Kylo added, expression serious and broody.

Rey suddenly went cold as she remembered one of their shared dreams, she swallowed thickly, her natural curiosity drying up as if it had never been.

“Rey?” Kylo’s large, warm hand cupped her cheek, and she looked up at him, suddenly afraid, “What’s wrong?”

For a moment she couldn’t speak,  _ <I think... I just touched the Darkside,> _ even her mental voice was weak.

They were both silent as they looked at each other in slowly dawning horror; for some reason, with the growth of their abilities, neither of them had considered what they were using - the Dark and the Light had existed in the mirror-reality, it had been a concern of their mirror-selves, not theirs. Hads they had been wrong?

_ <Maybe don’t do that again?> _ Kylo finally sent, and she noticed Luke was no longer with them.

Rey nodded fervently, “Yeah. Good idea… I don’t know how it happened,” she bit her lip, fear erasing all the calm she had felt as she had touched the Force, “That Yoda entity even warned us about it.”

Kylo mustered a crooked smile, “If either of us went there, it really ought to have been  _ me _ ,” he joked. 

Rey snorted and rolled her eyes, grateful for the levity, despite the implication, “You won’t go Dark, I won’t let you.”

Kylo leaned in and kissed her softly,  _ <I won’t let you either, love.> _

 

It looked like Leia had picked up a mountain of sandwiches along with snacks and fruit. They ate outside as the sun began to sink into the mountains in the distance, casting pale lilac and deepening blue across the sky, blending with the dark blue, jagged smudges in the distance. Everyone was fairly quiet, conscious of sharing their meal with two teachers, and Hux.

Hux sat on the periphery of the group, periodically throwing burning glances at her. Rey briefly considered brushing his mind to see if anything had changed, but thought better of it. She’d leave it till later, when the adults were in the cockpit and Kylo was in the loop.

She ate absently, her mind constantly returning to that call of darkness -  _ what would it have shown her, if she had let it? _ Admittedly her mirror-self had gained no answers from her experience, so it was likely it would be the same for her too. A little like gambling, you could win millions of credits, gain nothing, or walk away with an addiction, debt and nothing to show for it.

It would be good to talk to that Yoda entity again, or maybe see more of their mirror-reality to try and learn from it. 

It got her wondering all over again if the Kylo and Rey there had survived the explosion from the riven lightsaber. So far she and Kylo here were fine, a little battered, a little bruised, but nothing serious. So either what happened there didn’t necessarily happen here, or somehow their mirror-selves were still alive…  _ Did they know that their actions rippled out into the layers of reality? Were they ever in her and Kylo’s heads, passengers themselves? _

There were so many questions, and the few answers they had been given merely led to more. It was frustrating, as frustrating as still not knowing who was behind her kidnap, or knowing why in the name of the light, was Hux was with them  _ and _ how he had that wall in his mind.

_ <You know you’re muttering under your breath and glaring into the middle distance, right?> _

Rey started slightly and smoothed her face,  _ <I do now.> _

“You need to finish eating on the plane, everyone else is done and we’ll be leaving soon.”

Rey sighed at Kylo and nodded, “I think I’ll finish it later, I’m not that hungry now.”

She was treated to a glare as she stood up, “You need to eat more,” he said as they collected their things and made their way to the back of the plane.

Rey rolled her eyes, “No, I don’t. Eating when you aren’t hungry is wasteful. Unless it’s perishable and you have nowhere to store it.”

Finn gave her a knowing look, “You don’t have to ration yourself now, Peanut,” he lowered his voice, “There will always be more. It took me a while to get used to it too.”   

Kylo’s fingers twining with hers, she could feel his pity through the bond. She had always hated pity, it made her feel weak. 

_ <You’re the least weak person I have ever met.> _

Rey snorted in spite of herself, she got kidnapped didn’t she?  _ And _ needed help escaping!

Finn looked between she and Kylo and shook his head, “I don’t think I’m ever going to get used to this,” he muttered.

 

Take off was about as pleasant as landing, her stomach disliked the way the plane moved and even after it had evened out, it was still unhappy.

Once Leia had told them they could unstrap, everyone (bar Hux) settled down with blankets, keeping close together as it was again very cold.

“So what do we tell the others when we get home?” Poe asked no one in particular. The Knights all looked up from their card game, confusion on their faces.

“What others?” Zainmar asked.

Poe frowned, “Our friends… Jess and Brobard know where we went, as I asked them to cover for us, the others probably know too, by now. Plus Hux said he told someone… So they won’t be buying the story of a Survival skills trip. Even if we do look the part.”

“The fewer people know, the better,” Rey said into the thoughtful silence, “The ones that have to be told something other than the story the teachers will be giving out, should be told a watered down version.”

Finn looked puzzled, “But why? Surely it doesn’t matter and the more people on the lookout for bad guys can only be good?”

Rey shook her head, “The more people know, the more people know, it will snowball… and you never know the repercussions from something like that until they happen.”

“Okay, then, so what  _ do _ we tell them?” Poe asked, obviously uncomfortable with the idea of misleading his friends.

“How about it was someone from Rey’s past, who was playing a bad joke on her?” Zainmar suggested.

“Or, we don’t know who it was, but Rey escaped on her own and we found her, then we chilled out at a hotel for most of the time we were away?”  Leonmar offered, fingers rapidly tagging his knee, clearly missing nicotine.

“Or Rey got a message that a friend was ill or something and she had to go to them straight away, but we didn’t know that and went after her?” Poe proposed.

Rey gave a dry chuckle, “I know no one who would play that sort of joke on me, and I had no real friends before Canto Bight.” She was amused to see some of them wince at that.

“I think we may be making things too complicated for ourselves,” Ingalan said, “They’re your friends, Poe - could you just say you aren’t allowed to talk about it? If you lie, it may come back to bite you in the arse. I think out of the two options, if it were me, I’d rather be told you couldn’t tell me, rather than you lie and I found out later.”

“That kind of makes sense, but, well... have you met Jess? She is persistent, and she hates not knowing things,” Poe said with a half smile.

“Show her Finn’s new scars, and I’ll show her mine,” Rey said quietly, “Then she’ll understand how serious it is and take your request for her silence seriously.”

Poe lost his smile but nodded slowly, “Yeah, that may work.” He didn’t sound happy about it though.

“Do we need to talk to Hux about this?” Javiell asked, breaking the slightly uncomfortable silence. Almost as one they all turned to look at Hux, who was looking down at his phone, apparently absorbed enough not to feel the weight of their combined stares.

_ <Before we land, I think you should try accessing his mind to see if the wall just kept me out, or if it is the same for you too,> _ Rey sent.

Kylo let out a sigh,  _ <Okay, but I need to be nearer him than this, I think.> _

“Whatever else his sins are, Hux isn’t stupid, I doubt he’ll go mouthing off to everyone,” Ingalan said.

_ Shit! _ Rey almost smacked her own forehead,  _ <I just realised - how do we explain the massive new scar in Hux’s leg? He won’t have any memory of us healing it!> _

Kylo groaned and leant his head back on the cold metal of the hold wall with an audible clunk. Immediately everyone turned back from Hux to look at him and he grimaced, rubbing his head.

“What was that for?” Zainmar asked, “I mean, it’s warranted for quite a few things over the last few days, but was there anything specific?”

“You know Rey mind tricked Hux?” Kylo asked, ignoring her look of disapproval, “Well, we just remembered he has a giant knife scar in his thigh. Which he will probably be asking us about when he next notices it.” 

“Ah, yes, I see the problem,” Ingalan said.

“Blood and blood ashes,” Zainmar added on top of him.

Javiell frowned, “We have two options, ignore him completely, or lie and say we got him to a hospital and the drugs they gave him for the pain addled his brain.”

“Or we could say Rey patched him up and the bacta did a really good job? I mean, she did pull the bullets out of us, so that would be believable,” Finn said.

Kylo shook his head, “Too close to the truth. We don’t really know how the mind trick thing works, it may be reversible with the right trigger.”

“We, could, maybe test it?” Leonmar said hesitantly, “You could, do it to one of us, about something small, then see if you can retrigger it?”

Rey looked at Kylo,  _ <Do we really want to go down that road?> _ he asked her, obviously uneasy with doing that to a friend.

Rey shrugged,  _ <It would be good to be sure, but it’s your call.> _

“Hey,” Zainmar said, poking Kylo in the leg, “Outloud or you’re just being rude.”

Rey shifted guiltily, as Kylo took a measured breath in, “Okay, we can test it, if someone wants to volunteer.”

There was a pause and then all four of the Knights chorused, “I’ll do it,” with varying degrees of enthusiasm. Finn and Poe both looked faintly embarrassed that they hadn’t joined the others. 

“Wait,” Rey said, suddenly feeling troubled, “I don’t think we should… So far I’ve only used it on people I’ll never see again,” she lowered her voice, “Plus  _ Hux.  _ There could be side effects we don’t know of, even the smallest change to your brain could have a negative effect, do some sort of damage.”

“I guess it’s ignoring him or lying then,” Javiell said, sounding slightly disappointed.

Poe shook his head, “If we ignore him, he may mention it to others, who may then have questions. We’ll have to lie. If we all stick to the same story, he’ll just have to accept it.”

“And if he doesn’t? What then? That contact of his could probably check with any hospital in moments,” Kylo said.

“Fuck,” Rey said vehemently, maybe she shouldn’t have been so hasty, this could have just made things worse.

Kylo’s arm came around her and drew her against his chest, “It’s done now, so stop guilting yourself.”

Rey sighed, “We’ll have to say I sorted him out and we used really good bacta. I have a history of dealing with wounds. We’ll say I cauterised it, I’ve done it before.”

 

There didn’t seem to be a way around it, and people started playing cards again. Rey found herself yawning, despite how long she’d slept earlier. Soon her eyes were heavy and the sound of conversation seemed to go in and out.

Her eyes tried to open as she felt herself being lifted,  _ <Give in and go to sleep, love,> _ Kylo’s soft, deep voice drifted through her mind as she was set down and drawn against something firm and hot as an arm wrapped around her. She had a vague concern about his mother seeing them like this, but before she could voice it, sleep carried her away.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, more filler, sorry guys. I was listening to random tracks from Aviators, then the Planets suite by Holst while writing this, (best version: London Symphony Orchestra conducted by Richard Hickox). Edited when super sleepy, so probably loads of errors, my bad, but wanted to get this out.


	94. Homecoming

Kylo held Rey close to him as she slept. He wasn’t far off it himself, but her recent brush with the Darkside worried him more than he had admitted to her. Her mirror-self, although she had answered the call and been to that cave, was almost pure Light - so Rey didn’t know what he knew, how all encompassing the Darkness was, how it swelled your veins with power and fury. How delicious and beguiling it could be, just to let go of  _ morals, _ of  _ conscience _ , all the  _ virtues _ that it was generally understood you should strive for. 

The Darkside tasted of promise and freedom, but in the end it was just something else that you became a slave to.

And it now seemed clear that the Dark and the Light were in their reality too… he and Rey had  never really analysed anything when they used the Force, their use was often instinctive, driven by need, or experimental. As he used it, he hadn’t noticed whether what he was using was more Dark or Light and he didn’t think Rey had been aware either, they just did what felt natural and what was needed...

Rey sighed in her sleep and he drew her closer against him, trying to Ignore Finn on her otherside who was snoring softly. Everyone was sleeping close together to keep warm, but 2187 had taken it a little too far in Kylo’s estimation.

Kylo, Javiell and Hux were the only ones still awake, he was fairly certain Javiell was staying awake to watch Hux, and it seemed like Hux was staying awake to watch Rey, for what purpose, Kylo couldn’t guess, though Hux never seemed to need a reason.

He felt sleeping pulling at his eyelids but battled to keep them open, unhappy with Hux’s scrutiny.

A finger poked his arm and he turned to where Javiell was leaning over a comatose Zainmar, “Sleep,” the other boy commanded, “I’m not tired, but will wake someone if I need to. Just go to sleep. Kylo.”

Kylo sighed softly and nodded, sliding till he was lying flat, curling his body around Rey’s further, falling asleep with his nose against her hair.

 

They were awoken by Leia and Javiell early, the sky seen through the small windows in the hold showed it was barely light and he was still half asleep as they strapped in to land.

“Hux didn’t sleep at all,” Javiell said quietly to Kylo as the plane banked unpleasantly, “He spent most of the time on his phone or looking at you and Rey, with the occasional glare for me.” Kylo grunted in reply, too bleary to make words or think much just yet.

 

They landed at Kalla, another small airport catering to private planes rather than commercial ones. It was raining heavily and it was whipped slantwise by the wind, Rey’s obvious dismay as the loading door opened was almost comical. Though Kylo had to admit it was a fairly miserable picture; it appeared as if the colour had been leached from the world, beneath a dull grey sky heavy with cloud.

“You can use the blankets to keep dry,” Leia said as she joined them a few feet from door, “Gather your things, all weapons are to go in this box,” she raised a cardboard box she held, “I know you all have guns, and I can count, so  _ do not  _ think you’ll be able to hold yours back. I want any knives,” here her gaze lingered a little on Rey, who shifted guiltily, “And anything else, like alcohol or cigarettes,” her sharp eyes look in Leonmar and Hux, “Anything that is not permitted on school property, including _ phones _ .” Kylo couldn’t help grinning as Hux glared daggers at that, lip curling as he crossed his arms tightly. Leia ignored them, ending with, “Quickly now, there is a minibus waiting to take us back to school.”

 

Everyone collected their things and handed in weapons and any contraband, before they hurried miserably after Leia, swathed in blankets. Luke stayed behind to do something with the plane, Leia didn’t explain what though.

It was Stold with the minibus, he beamed at Leia, then glared at everyone else as they piled onto the bus as quickly as they could. Despite the blankets, they were wet and Rey was shivering as she tried to stop her teeth chattering.

“Never thought I would say this, but I miss the desert,” Zainmar said as he flipped his wet sandy hair out of his eyes.

“Peanut, you need to take the blanket off, it’s too wet to keep on and we don’t want you to get ill again,” Finn said, as he prodded her.

Kylo frowned and pulled it off her before she could stop him, dumping it on the floor with his own.

“Hey!” she said indignantly as she glared at him.

Kylo smirked down at her, she was adorable when she was cross, “It would have just seeped through into your hoodie, your legs are already wet as it is.” He pulled her protesting form under his arm so he could give her some of his warmth. 

“I could have taken it off myself you know,” she muttered, even as she snuggled against his chest,  _ <Did you have a go at Hux while I was sleeping?> _

Kylo grimaced,  _ <No. There wasn’t really a good opportunity.> _

_ <How about now? He’s sitting right behind us.> _

_ <I’ll try once we’re on the road,> _ he replied as he tried to look out of the already steamed up window. She huffed a sigh but didn’t argue, instead asking where they were.  _ <Kalla, it’s about just over an hour away from school.> _

He could feel a shiver of excitement and nervousness through the bond, followed by hunger as her stomach growled,  _ <So we’ll get there in time to have breakfast?> _

Kylo almost laughed,  _ <We should do, yes.> _

Rey’s hopes were dashed however. Once they were on the road, Leia turned from her seat in the front to announce that they would be stopping for breakfast, rather than wait till they arrived at school. Rey’s disappointment was palpable and Kylo was pretty sure that was a pout on her lips, but she flashed her eyes at him and he decided it may be wise not to draw attention to it.

 

There was another, though much shorter, dash through the rain to what turned out to be a rather nice cafe. The smell of warm pastries and strong coffee permeated the air and everyone made happy noises as they studied what was on display.

Leia insisted they sit together and as they ate, she looked at them all seriously, “As previously discussed, we will not be telling people what you all…  _ got up to,  _ while you were away,” she told them, keeping her voice quiet yet firm. “You have been on a survival skills course in Gacerian. You were selected by Master Luke. Rey left school early as there was an extra day course for fighting with a staff that Master Luke wanted her to attend. It was a last minute detail and some people were not informed, hence the police.” Leia paused and gave them a dry smile, “I realise this story is flimsy at best, but it is better than criminal records and anyone knowing you were in the vicinity of Tatooine. I suggest you give as few details as you can to your friends. Obviously you won’t be able to hide your injuries, but downplay them as much as you can please.”

For an awful moment Kylo thought she was going to touch on his and Rey’s abilities and he very gently shook his head, hoping his mother would understand him,  _ just this once. _

Her eyes flickered to him for perhaps half a second, “You’ve all healed up nicely at least.”

Kylo let out a silent sigh of relief and felt Rey do the same, some of the others shifted but that was it, no one so much as looked at Hux.

_ <Fuck, that was close,> _ Rey sent, sounding tense.

_ <It was,> _ he agreed as he curled his fingers with hers.

“When we arrive at school, I encourage you to go straight to the dorm to wash and change. There will be lots of school work for you to catch up on this weekend,” she arched one eyebrow as people groaned, “You didn't think you’d be exempt did you? I suggest that you catch up quickly, or there will be consequences.”

 

Once they were back on the road, Kylo dutifully extended himself and tried brushing Hux’s mind, but found it impossible to focus without looking at him or touching him.

_ <So turn around,> _ Rey said practically.

Kylo rolled his eyes at her, _ <And say what? If I randomly turn round to glare at him, he is going to say something.> _

Rey frowned, brow creasing as she thought, _ <I got nothing… unless,> _ her nose wrinkled in disgust,  _ <Unless I say thank you to him for all his help. I think you turning around with me would make sense.> _

Kylo curled his lip,  _ <Do you really want to do that? He may assume you feel you owe him for it. Which you absolutely do not. He was useful, very useful, but he owes you for way more grief than this counts towards.> _

Rey gripped his hand tightly as her eyes flashed,  _ <He can assumes what he likes and he frequently does. His assumption won’t get him anywhere though, and I can’t help feeling this is important. We need to know. If you can get into his head, you might be able to see if the mind trick work or not, and find out how the barrier in his mind can even exist.> _

He sighed but gave her a small nod, hoping the others wouldn’t react too badly to what Rey was about to say.

He watched as she squared her shoulders and attempted to put on a grateful expression but only managed uncomfortable, before turning in her seat to look at Hux, Kylo copying her.

“Hux…” she paused as Hux regarded her, eyes locked on her face before him, completely ignoring Kylo. 

“What is it  _ Scavenger?” _ he asked, voice silky.

Kylo brushed against Hux’s mind, but beyond a few stray glimmers of emotion, he found the same barrier Rey had described. He barely heard their conversation as he concentrated, trying to break through whatever the hell it was that blocked him. He thought perhaps he was making progress when Rey’s hand squeezed his in warning,  _ <Stop!> _

Kylo blinked to see Hux clutching his head, he withdrew as Hux hissed.

“Are you okay?” Rey asked Hux, expressing a good semblance of mild concern.

Hux’s eyes narrowed, as if he suspected she had done something, but dropped his hands and shook his head, “I’m fine, just a sudden headache, you were saying?”

Rey shrugged, “That was pretty much it, thanks.” 

Hux smiled thinly at her, “Noted,” he said, still in that silky tone.

Kylo turned back around as Rey did, the hairs on the back of his neck prickled as if Hux were still watching them, but he didn’t turn round to see.  _ <I found the barrier, like you said. I think there is a small possibility I could break through it with time, but it would be extremely painful, and Hux would be aware of it happening.> _

He could feel Rey’s agitation as she sent,  _ <Fuck. I don’t think we can get away with holding him down and doing it somewhere out of the way. Not without him telling someone, then Leia and Luke would find out and we’d be in the shit.> _

Kylo could only agree,  _ <I guess we just keep an eye on him, then. Not much else we can do at the moment.> _

Rey nodded against his chest and he put his arm around her again, holding her close as the others gave them curious glances, he mouthed  _ ‘later’ _ , at the Knights and they went back to staring out at the muted landscape through the misted windows.

 

Thankfully the rain had let up when they arrived back at school. Rather than going through the main building, they walked to their dorm along the side of the school, past the hulking wreck of the library, which now had a chain link fence around it and various demolition equipment next to it. 

It was still relatively early for a saturday morning, so there weren’t many people around in the dorm when they entered. 

Mara met them, looking almost tearful as she smiled, “Welcome back,” Kylo thought she was going to go so far as hug Rey, but she settled on patting Rey’s hand instead.

Suddenly he realised that they would now have to part, that Rey would go up the girls stairs and he up the boys. The idea of being separated from her felt deeply wrong, even if they would still be in the same building, even if they could still hear each other.

They paused as everyone else started up the stairs, looking into eachothers eyes, unwilling to let go of each other’s hand.

“Meet you downstairs in an hour?” Rey asked him softly.

Kylo nodded reluctantly, then pulled her into his arms, her lips met his, warm and soft and he thought this would always be where home truly was, in her arms.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is much later than it should be, life is messy and full of distractions atm (also I keep getting sucked into Pinterest, which really needs to stop happening ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ my bad. [It’s here if you wanna look](https://www.pinterest.co.uk/AmberDDread/l) … also, yeah, I know, Cantonica is a desert planet… But _poetic licence_ , it’s not a desert in _this_ reality.


	95. Reunion

This was Rey’s first real homecoming. She had never been away from home before, not like this… Niima and Jakku had never really been home, just somewhere she’d lived. But here, her own room awaited her, she had come  _ home. _

She felt rather nervous as she climbed the girls stairs; she was excited but couldn’t help remembering the boys had been in her room after she had been taken, that the police probably had too. They would have been in her space, gone through her things… she rolled her eyes at herself,  _ she was being stupid.  _ Still, she could feel her heartbeat pick up a little bit as she arrived at her door.

_ <Are you okay?> _ Kylo sent, sounding concerned.

Rey blushed a little, alone in the corridor,  _ <I’m fine, promise. See you later.> _

It was silly but she missed him, even though he was still close by, even though she could feel him and talk to him through the bond, she missed his presence all the same.

Giving herself a shake, she opened her door. Everything looked almost the same as she had left it, her nest was still there, neat and tidy with an extra fur blanket at the foot. Her old boot was still on the desk, propping up her textbooks, her makeshift staff stood in the corner…  _ Home _ , she was  _ home _ . She had to swallow several times around the sudden lump in her throat, irritably brushing away a few tears as she muted the bond so Kylo wouldn’t feel any of this.

She had been gone for just over a week, but it felt more like a year. Yet everything was still here, waiting for her, because people had wanted her to come home, people had missed her, had felt the loss of her presence. 

Suddenly, all the fear, anger and pain of her abduction finally hit her, she sank to her knees as tears streamed down her face. It had been so easy to close herself off from it all when she was with the Fett’s and Jabba - she had had to keep her wits so she could survive. Then the relief of escaping, the joy of seeing Kylo and the others, the need to get away, had meant she must continue to be strong. But now, now the dam burst, the floodgates were wide open and she almost couldn't breathe...  _ How many had she killed? How many had died for her to be free? And what had it  _ **_done_ ** _ to the boys? _

She crawled over to her nest, there under one of her pillows, was her doll; the one she had made herself all those years ago, so that she would never really be alone. She clutched it to her chest as she tried to calm her sobbing breath. 

After ten minutes or so of staring out at the awful weather and rocking her doll as she hugged it, she felt together enough to stand, grab delightfully clean clothes, that were  _ hers _ , and head to the bathroom.

As she luxuriated in the shower, she mentally pulled herself together, almost as if stripping off the clothes she had got in the south and scrubbing her skin that was still touched with desert sand and dust, was what she needed to rebuild herself.  She had returned with nothing she had left Canto Bight in, not even the same hair length or colour. She had her knives and tool kit, but they had been brought along by the boys… So she shampooed her hair several times, hoping to get as much of the dye out as possible - it would be a stretch explaining to people that she had had her hair cut and coloured whilst on a  _ survival skills _ trip, there wasn’t much she could do about the shorter length, but hopefully the dye would come out easily, Dama had said it would.

When her skin was pink from scrubbing, her nails clean and the water dripping off her hair was clear, she got out.

She had chosen to dress in some of her old clothes, they were familiar and comforting and right now that’s what she needed, though she did wear her new boots and pull one of her new hoodies over her old t shirt.

She smiled as she looked at herself in the mirror, her hair was back to chestnut and after some wrangling, she managed to get it up in her preferred style… but it looked somewhat forlorn with it’s reduced volume, so she took it out again and just pulled the top half back away from her face and put it in a ponytail. It looked odd, but the loose hair would keep her neck warm and it wasn’t like it was going to get in her way. After spraying on some Nightbloomer, she felt whole again, almost reborn.

Back in her room, she quickly concealed the knives she’d had on her and put her tool kit away, then took a deep breath and started down the stairs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_ <I’m on my way down,> _ Rey sent and Kylo felt the tension in his shoulders decrease. 

_ <I’m already down, in the lobby.> _ He had been downstairs for a while, her side of the bond had gone suspiciously quiet after he’d asked her if she was okay and he couldn’t help worrying. He’d washed and changed quickly, (but thoroughly), in case Rey needed him. They had only been back an hour or so, but already he was chafing at their separation… and although he was glad to be back home, glad to be safe… their dorm, the school, felt small somehow, as if he’d outgrown it. He couldn’t help looking at the other students and classing them as children, whereas he and the Knights were now something else… Everyone still gave them a wide berth at least, and it was good to be back in black, with the home comforts he had previously taken for granted. The luxury of always having access to a bathroom and comfy mattress was now something he truly appreciated. 

He smiled as Rey reached the bottom of the stairs, she was in some of her old scruffy jeans and a hoodie that was at least one size too big for her. To his surprise he noticed her hair was down, though pulled away from her face, it was back to her natural colour though and she looked like her again. Though he would be lying if he said she hadn’t looked good in her disguise.

“Are you all right?” he asked as he took her in his arms, she seemed as relieved to see him as he was her.

He felt her nod against his chest, “Yeah, just weird being back, you know?”

“Good weird?” he couldn't help asking.

She looked up at him then, with a small smile, “Of course. This is home.”

Kylo nodded and tilted her chin so he could kiss her briefly, “Poe’s friends and the Knights are in the movie room… are you ready for this?”  

Rey let out a small sigh but nodded, “I guess so.”

Kylo took her hand and laced his fingers with hers, “It’ll be fine. Just stick to the story, give as few details as you can and deflect any awkward questions.” She gave him a wry look.

They had barely got through the door, when there were squeals of “Rey-Rey!” and Rey was hit with three bodies at once, caught in the middle of an tearful group hug and Kylo lost his hold on her hand.

He looked beyond the girls to where the boys were all still seated, watching the spectacle bemusedly, and he maneuvered himself into a seat, nodding to Brobard and the others in greeting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Rey had no idea what to do. Kenjad had attached herself to her like a limpet, and Jess and Maritan were hugging her back and front, all three of them were babbling at once and she was pretty sure Maritan was crying.

_ <Do you need assistance?> _ Kylo’s sending was deeply amused.

_ <Maybe? I don’t know what I’m meant to do!> _ she replied as she awkwardly tried to pat Kenjad’s back. 

“Okay you guys, maybe let go of Peanut now?” Finn advised from somewhere.

Poe appeared and pried Jess away and the other two girls moved away a little as well, they were now smiling and laughing and Rey felt her lips curve up to answer theirs.

“Why don’t we sit down?” Poe suggested helpfully.

Rey flashed him a grateful smile as she made her way to where Kylo sat, she’d been planning on sitting next to him but he pulled her into his lap instead and she couldn’t find it in her to protest.

To be fair to him, there weren’t enough seats for all of them anyway - Kenjad hopped up onto Shaadr’s lap, Jess settled onto Kalhale’s and Brobard pulled Maritan onto his, she let out a squeak of surprise but didn’t get up.

“So,” Jess began when everyone was comfortable, “What in the name of sweet hell and the light,  _ happened? _ ”

The Knights, Rey, Finn and Poe all eyed each other, none of them sure what to say or even how to begin.

“And don’t even try with the Survival Skills trip thing,” Kenjad added.

Rey expected Poe to speak but he was looking at she and Kylo… “We can’t talk about it,” she started awkwardly, “For…” she trailed off, trying to find the right words.

“For legal reasons,” Kylo supplied as he took up the slack, “I know you all know some shit went down, and it did, but we really can’t talk about it. All that matters is that Rey is okay, and so are we.” There was a pause as everyone looked at them incredulously, then turned to Poe.

“You just can’t expect us to accept that!” Jess said indignantly, “Do you have any idea how  _ awful  _ this week has been? Obviously we know yours was shitty, but being here and not knowing if Rey was dead or not, not knowing where the hell you guys went and if you were safe,  _ was horrible! _ And the fucking teachers gave us nothing but lies! And then you get home, and spout bullshit at us?  _ We’re your friends! _ Granted we don’t normally hang out with the Knights, but you Poe? _ Really? _ And you, Rey and Finn?” Jess was almost breathless with anger, her eyes flashing as she took them in. There was an uncomfortable silence as everyone shifted in the seats.

“Poe, dude, you need to come clean at least a bit, we covered for you when you left, you owe us,” Brobard added and the others nodded.

Poe looked at Rey and the Knights unhappily, then sighed and rubbed his forehead, “I know we owe you, but, well... it is  _ really _ complicated and we really aren’t meant to say anything, honestly for legal reasons.”

“We weren’t asking for a blow by blow account,” Ashtjac said, “And we won’t let anything you tell us leave this room.”

Finn shook his head and suddenly stood up, everyone turned to look at him as he strode to the door. He opened it, peered around, then shut it again and leaned against it, “No one is listening or even near the door.”

_ <Should we stop this?> _ Rey sent nervously, feeling very conflicted.

_ <If we do, they’ll get the story another time,”  _ Kylo replied,  _ <Now may be the best time because at least we can do damage control, make sure Poe doesn’t spill everything. I don’t like it, but I don’t think there is anything we can do about it.> _

Poe looked at she and the Knights apologetically, before saying, “Okay,  _ okay,  _ so _. _ .. Rey was kidnapped by a… by someone bad. We still don’t know why. We went to get her back as we were able to... track her… we ended up down south and had to mount a rescue… we got her back though and escaped, but were being pursued, then we were found by Master Luke, Mrs. Organa and Mr Solo and they brought us home. There was some fighting and some of us were injured but we are okay now. We can’t talk about it because we… committed some crimes to get Rey back... and all we know is that the people that took her did so because someone paid them to, but we don’t know who or why.” Rey felt her cheeks flame as everyone stopped looking at Poe and looked at her, but as he carried on, they turned back to him. “That’s all I can tell you, honestly, I’m really sorry, but I really can’t tell you anymore.”  

“Well, okay then,” Jess said, she turned to look Kenjad and Maritan, who both nodded at her, then she looked at Rey, “You need to come with us, there is something we need to talk about.”

It wasn’t a request, “Err,” Rey answered intelligently.

Jess and Maritan both got up and grabbed her hands, hauling her to her feet, “We’ll see you guys in a bit,” Jess told the boys, before the three girls dragged Rey out of the room, her wide eyes looking over her shoulder at Kylo, who just shrugged at her. _ Bloody boys. _

“Where are we going?” Rey asked as the movie room door shut behind them.

“Reading room is empty, let’s go in there,” Kenjad said from the doorway.

They took Rey around to the far corner and faced her, “We’ve been talking this past week and we had an idea,” Jess said firmly, “How would you feel about us moving up to your floor with you? Then you wouldn’t be on your own, and if,” here she lowered her voice after furtively glancing around, “If someone else tries to do anything to you, you won’t be on your own up there.”

Maritan nodded and Kenjad bounced on her feet, expression earnest. Rey had no idea what to say to that, before she could formulate a response, Maritan added, “Plus having our own space would be nice and if more than one of us can’t sleep we can chat without waking the others up.”

Rey chewed her lip, on one hand, having them around to talk to would be… nice. On the other, she would no longer have the whole floor to herself, and if anyone did break in to try and get to her, she’d have the girls to protect as well as herself… though if they’d come up the girl’s stairs, they would possibly have disturbed someone anyway...

“We won’t push your boundaries,” Kenjad said as she placed her little hand on Rey’s arm, “And we can hang out after hours, play games or do homework together, or nothing if you need alone time or Kylo time.”

Rey did have the lock still on her door and perhaps it would be nice, maybe to have… her friends nearer. To be able to see them after curfew.

“Will Mara allow you to move during term time?” she asked slowly, still unsure about this.

Jess looked smug, “We already asked her, we didn’t want to disappoint you in case you said yes.”

Rey was surprised to feel herself grinning, “Okay then… though sometimes I may go over to Kylo’s room, so don’t freak out if I’m not in my room.”

Maritan’s normally sweet smile turned wicked, “Don’t worry, we won’t, just make sure you let one of us know where you’re going.”

They went in for another group hug and this time, Rey didn’t feel quite so awkward.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: After writing that Kylo was glad to be back in black, I had this in my head - Back In Black by AC/DC.  
> This one was awkward to write, and new meds and tests and stuff are slowing things down, so sorry. Love you guys ♥ I’ll keep at it, it’ll just be slow. Also, sorry I haven't replied to some of your comments, I'm working on it ♥


	96. Back To Life, Back To Reality

Rey and the girls went tell Mara straight away, Rey felt a little overwhelmed with it all but her smile mirrored the other’s.

“Well, that’s just lovely!” Mara exclaimed, smiling so widely Rey was slightly concerned her face may split. “There are some things I will need to sort out, but you girls may move in tomorrow afternoon. That gives you time to choose which rooms you’d like, sort through your things and pack up. Come to me after lunch and I will have some boxes for you.” Her beaming face took them all in, but came to linger on Rey, “Rey, I have all the work you and Finn missed, why don’t you come with me so I can hand it over, I’m afraid there is quite a lot.”

It was a fairly obvious dismissal to the others, but they accepted it, grinning at Rey before excitedly clattering up the girls stairs to start packing their things.

Mara watched them leave, then nodded to herself and looked at Rey, some of her smile had left her face and her eyes were bright, “Of course, I don’t know the details, Rey, but I cannot say more how very glad I am that you have been returned to us in one piece,” she paused and gently patted Rey’s hand, “You come to me if you need anything, or if there is anything that worries you, please.” She handed Rey a key fob with a button on it, “Press this if you ever need me, or need… assistance. It is just a precaution,” she gave a little laugh, “Mainly to help me worry less, I will feel happier knowing you have it.”

Rey took the fob, her throat tight and nodded, she remembered their first meeting, how like a mother Mara had seemed to her. She felt a small urge to hug her, all that warmth and care calling to her, but she wasn’t ready yet, perhaps one day.

Rey cleared her throat, “Thank you, Mara, really.”

Mara nodded, looking away a little, then chuckled, “You may not be saying that when I hand over your homework! Come along dear, the sooner you start on it the sooner you’ll be done.” 

 

Mara had not been kidding when she said Rey and Finn had a lot of work to catch up on. Finn groaned dramatically and banged his forehead down once they settled at one of the tables in the common area. “Why did we come back?  _ Why? _ ”

Rey rolled her eyes at him, and lowered her voice, “Because, dummy, we get all the food we want, we get somewhere safe to sleep and no one is  _ shooting _ at us.”

Finn raised his head and sighed, “Fair points, all,” he conceded, “Shall we start with the worst to get it over with?”

Rey huffed a dry laugh, “The worst? P.S.D or Critical thinking?”

Finn rubbed his chin, “Probably Critical thinking? P.S.D comes in a close second though.” 

They started to slog through the pile together, the Knights and Poe were at the same table, but as they were in the year above, their homework was rather different to Rey and Finn’s.

Rey found it hard to concentrate and it seems the others felt the same. Homework, school work, seemed so very trivial, unimportant after what they had gone through. Although it was wonderful to be home, it felt like Rey’s first day at Canto Bight all over again, but at least this time she wasn’t alone.

They broke for lunch early, desperate for any excuse to pause their work. As their other friends had had late breakfasts, it was only the ‘Operation Peanut’ team, as Finn still referred to them, who went to lunch.

Rey found herself ridiculously happy to see all the fruit on offer, though as it was still wet and cold, she had a bowl of hot soup before she started on the fruit.

There weren’t many people in the refectory yet and they had a large choice of where to sit, yet somehow they all ended up on the most isolated table.

For a while, they were mostly silent, enjoying being able to choose what they wanted to eat and consuming it at a table.

“We should all get matching tattoos,” Zainmar announced after a while and everyone looked at him, “To commemorate… well, you know.”

Leonmar rolled his eyes, “I think the scars are enough, Zain.”

Zainmar shook his head, “No, those are reminders, we didn’t  _ choose _ them,” he shrugged, “I don’t know, just thought it would be something positive. We survived, we got Rey back.”

Rey shifted awkwardly at that, but remained silent; she could see where Zainmar was coming from, like the cuts she gave herself, it was a mark to show you were in control, that you had survived. And she knew all about surviving. Kylo’s hand found hers under the table and squeezed. 

Finn gave her a lopsided smile, “We could all get tatts of peanuts,” he joked.

Ingalan snorted, “And just where would we go to get these done? Nowhere near here is going to ink a group of kids.”

There was a silence, Rey was fairly sure they were all thinking the same thing, they weren’t kids anymore.

“Firepit is on tonight,” Poe said after the pause became too long, “Though it may be a wash out.”

“If it isn’t raining I’m game,” Leonmar said, “I need a drink and to let loose a bit.”

The others agreed though Kylo and Rey remained quiet, “What about you, Peanut?” Finn asked as he bumped her elbow gently.

Rey grimaced, “I don’t have such a great track record with the firepit. I may give it a miss.”

“That is true,” Poe said, matching her grimace.

_ <Quiet night in together?> _ Kylo asked.

_ <Downstairs, perhaps. The weather may be too bad to go over the roof tonight.> _

She felt Kylo’s wave of frustration, it echoed her own,  _ <We’ll work something out, I need to be with you tonight. We don’t have to do anything, I just need to be with you.> _ Rey gave him a small nod of agreement, she needed him too.

“I think the girls were hoping to celebrate their impending move with you though, Peanut,” Finn said and Rey blinked, back in the room.

“Maybe they’ll be okay celebrating next week? What happens if it is too wet for the firepit?”

Zainmar laughed, “Everyone is pissed off and hangs out in the common area, or goes to their room to drink. Someone has probably already booked the movie room, so that’s out.”

“We could always go swimming, play some games? The pool shuts at 9pm for our dorm,” Poe suggested.

Kylo shook his head, “Maybe not go swimming while our scars look so new, someone may notice them.”

“There are quite a lot of us, I doubt anyone would get that close if we stick in our group,” Poe argued.

Kylo frowned, then shrugged, “Maybe.”

Rey shook her head, “I’ll pass, bad things happen on Saturdays.”

Javiell snorted, “I’d say most days bad things happen for you.”

“Yeah, all you have are Sundays,” Finn added.

Rey groaned, “You had to go and say it, didn’t you? Sod’s law means something bad will happen tomorrow, now.”

“Less of the fatalism, and you can reclaim Tuesdays cos that’s when we rescued you, and today is a good Saturday cos we all came home safe,” Poe said, trying to put a positive spin on things.

Rey shrugged, “Maybe, we’ll see. Either way, I’m for a quiet night. Probably doing homework, we have a stupid amount to get through and I want to catch up with as much as I can before Monday lessons.”

Ingalan grimaced, “That is true, and there’ll only be more.” Everyone made unhappy noises.

“It’s like we’ve been in a bubble or something,” Zainmar said, “And it’s burst and its back to life and back to reality. It sucks.”

Leonmar grunted, “So you’d rather be on the run in the south, getting shot at, sleeping snatches in a van and living on onestop sandwiches, whilst in the company of Hux?”

Zainmar huffed, “Well, when you put it like that, I guess not.” 

 

The rest of the afternoon was filled with homework and trying to deflect questions from other students. Being in the company of the Knights helped, keeping most at bay, but she knew that would change once she and Finn were back in lessons. 

During a pause in work, as she chewed on a pencil and stared morosely out of a window at the awful weather, a simple solution came to her for she and Kylo’s problem.  _ <What about if I just come to your after curfew and mind trick anyone I come across?> _

Kylo glanced at her sharply then away, a frown on his face,  _ <I’m not sure that’s wise. I don’t think we should play around with our abilities, the mind trick may have consequences we don’t yet know about.> _

Rey sighed but nodded, _ <We should sort out a time to practice, like Luke said. It feels like there must be so much more we can do.> _

She could feel Kylo’s disquiet rattle through the bond,  _ <There probably is, but some of it will be from the Dark side, we may not know which is which till its too late.> _

< _ I suppose, but… _ > Rey frowned and chewed her lip, she had been thinking a lot about this,  _ <well, nothing is really black and white is it? Can the Darkside really be all evil? Some people think guns are evil but it’s the person that wields it that decides what they do with it, so couldn’t the Force be the same?> _

Kylo was quiet for a long time before he replied, his voice in her head quiet but intense,  _ <Your mirror-self never truly felt it, mine did, mine bathed in it... perhaps it isn’t all evil, but its users seem to be, and that must say something. We know hardly anything though, we are blind and we have to be as cautious as if we were handling a lit firework. If we aren’t careful it could explode in our faces.> _

_ <I wish we could talk to Yoda again,> _ she sent,  _ <We should definitely practice though, the more control the less likely we are to make a mistake.> _

She didn’t add that though they were home, it didn’t mean someone still wouldn’t come for her. Kylo had already done too much because of her, they all had. No, this time, if someone came for her, she would be ready and able to take them down. No matter what. Being back had brought it  _ home _ , sometimes, to survive, you had to do questionable things, she had been doing that for years and she wasn’t going to stop. This was her  _ home _ and  _ these people were her family  _ and she wouldn’t hold back from using the Darkside if it meant keeping her and them safe.

Kylo’s warm hand found hers, a troubled look on his face,  _ <We’ll work it out, just don’t try anything on your own, and I’ll do the same.> _

Rey didn’t reply, just leaned against his chest, tucking her head under his chin as his arms came around her. Safe for now.

 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo knew that Rey’s moral compass was a little grey, the nature of her life up until Canto Bight had required her to choose survival over sticking to the right side of the law. It was ingrained in her, that drive to endure. But it worried him all the same.

It was probably too early to know if the Fett’s had carried out Rey’s instructions, they may not have done it yet, but he would feel a lot happier about things when they heard if it had worked or not. Hopefully Luke or Han would keep an ear out and let them know.

Then they’d just be left with the orchestrator behind it all, the puppet master pulling the strings… that was hardly comforting, but it at least took their enemies down to one, nameless though they were. Plus, there was still the mystery of Hux’s mind, that was unsettling too. 

He sighed, everything was so complicated, and judging by the weather outside, they’d be sleeping alone tonight. The thought made his skin prickle with anxiety. At least the girls would be on Rey’s floor from tomorrow night, Rey had said they wouldn’t dob she and Kylo in for roof hopping and bed sharing, and knowing she wasn’t alone when he couldn’t be there would reassure somewhat.

Ignoring his maths homework he let his mind travel down more pleasurable pathways, remembering their last night here before it all went to shit… they’d managed to smuggle Rey up the boys stairs, perhaps they could do it again? Though maybe they shouldn’t tempt fate too soon, he wouldn’t be surprised if Mara and Stold had been told to keep a closer eye on the, (for want of a better term), Operation Peanut team. All it would take would be one word from Hux or one of his cronies and they’d be in a heap of trouble.

Once he and Rey was done with school, they’d have nothing standing in their way. That couldn’t come soon enough.

“Rey-Rey!” Everyone at the table jumped slightly at the ecstatic squeals as the girls rushed up to the table, all of them ridiculously excited. It made Kylo wonder how Rey was going to cope sharing her floor with them.

“They’re holding the All Hallows Eve Dance next Saturday!” Kenjad cried excitedly.

“Well, they’re holding a dance next saturday, it won’t be All Hallows Eve then, but still! You get to wear your dress!” Jess added.

Kylo cut his eyes at Ingalan, giving him a slight nod of encouragement, even as he felt a needle of nerves from the bond.

_ <Really? You can jump off roofs and and beat the shite of out grown men, but you’re worried about a dance?> _ He didn’t miss the sideways glare she sent him as she shifted in her seat. 

“Okay,” she said, to the still bouncing girls, who looked a little put out over her rather unenthused response, Kylo hid a grin behind his hand, Finn openly chuckled.

The blond one, he thought she was called Maritan, patted Rey’s shoulder reassuringly, “It will be fun! Honest, and you need an excuse to wear your dress.”

Kylo smirked and dropped his hand, “I’m looking forward to seeing you in a dress.”

Rey shot him a withering look, though he noticed with amusement that her cheeks had gone a little pink.

“Err, Jess? Could I talk to you for a second?” Ingalan’s voice was steady but Kylo could see he was nervous. Jess looked surprised for a moment, but nodded and they walked a few paces away. 

“Okay, twenty credits she says no,” Leonmar said as soon as they were out of earshot.

Zainmar rubbed his chin briefly, “I’ll take it, he’s new meat.”

Kenjad and Maritan both looked disapproving but turned their attention back to Rey, “Show us around your floor and we can choose rooms, Jess can follow us in a minute,” Kenjad commanded as her little hand grabbed one of Rey’s hands and Maritan grabbed the other.

“Okay, but I can’t be too long, still got a pile of work to do,” Rey grumbled as she was led off.

A thought occurred to Kylo and he looked at Finn, “Does Rey know how to dance?”

Finn shrugged, “I’ve never asked, but somehow I doubt it… To be honest, I don’t either.”

Poe beamed, “I’ll teach you!” he turned to Kylo, “I can teach Rey too if you’d like?” he asked hesitantly.

Kylo did his best not to glower at him, “I can teach her,” he answered stiffly, ignoring Zainmar’s snort of laughter behind him.

“Kylo, you dance like a bear with arthritis, maybe let Poe teach her,” Leonmar drawled.

Zainmar started wheezing, and Poe and Finn both sniggered behind their hands as if doing so somehow stopped the sound of it, Kylo treated them all to an exceptionally flat look.

“How’d it go?” Leonmar asked as Ingalan rejoined them, looking curiously at Zainmar, Poe and Finn who were still trying not to laugh.

Ingalan gave them a small smile, “She said yes.”

“Get in!” Zainmar whooped and held out his hand to Leonmar, who pouted but dug in his pocket.

Ingalan raised his eyebrow as the money changed hands but didn’t comment, a small smile still playing on his face.

 

Everyone went to dinner together, this time the dining room was much fuller, though they managed to cram themselves all onto one table.

They chattered about if the firepit would happen or not, though Kylo felt it should have been obvious it wouldn’t be, about the girls move and about the upcoming dance. Poe’s group did most of the talking, the Knights were quieter and Rey was almost silent, he could feel exhaustion pulling at her, and if he were honest, he wasn’t much better.

She went upstairs almost as soon as they got back from dinner and he felt the bond darken less than ten minutes after she had gone.

He and the Knights stayed up for a little while, playing Halo, but it was odd, shooting monsters when only days ago they had shot men. Killed men. They didn’t play for long.

Kylo was in bed by 9pm. His bed was cold, and while only a single, if felt too big, empty. Even so he drifted off quickly, but he was plagued by bad dreams, memories mixed with with what could have been, and he began to find it hard to remember what was real and what was not…

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Rey awoke abruptly, blinking in the darkness, alone. She struggled to orient herself before the familiar feel of her doll in the crook of her arm reminded her she was at home, in her nest.

But something was wrong, she could feel Kylo was asleep but she could also feel his distress, it was leaking through the bond, a sour, bitter taint. She couldn’t leave him like that, alone. 

Her old soft boots had been lost at Jabba’s and her trainers would likely not have enough grip for the rain slick roof, the soft brown boots she had brought with the girls seemed to be her best bet as the army ones from Near Pando were stiff around the ankles.

She put on some of her sports leggings, figuring they’d dry quicker and pulled on a long sleeved t-shirt and a thin jumper, then used an old sand scarf to wrap around her neck and head. There was barely any light outside, the clouds hiding the moon and stars and the campus was dark, it being past curfew, so she put on her goggles too. The light on them could be dimmed a little so she wouldn’t be too obvious, the rest of her was clothed in black, apart from the scarf which was a dark sandy colour.

This was going to be unpleasant, she muted the bond so Kylo’s distress wouldn’t distract her and she shoved a couple of picks and a flat head screwdriver in her boots in case Kylo’s window wasn’t open. 

It was windy, driving the rain towards her and she lowered her window again as much as she could before she started climbing. She took her time but also didn’t dawdle, going too fast would mean she slipped but the slower she went the more wet she got, which would increase the likelihood of slipping. She was a skilled climber, but rain wasn’t something she’d had any experience with. She almost fell when she went over the edge to Kylo’s window, for an agonising moment she hung from one hand before her scrambling feet found the sill. She crouched there for a moment, her heart beating painfully in her throat, before she took out her tools and manipulated the shut window, easing it open as quietly as she could and slipping through, closing it behind her.

Kylo was on his bed, tossing and turning, the covers tangled around his long limbs as he made tiny noises of distress. Rey pulled off her jumper and scarf, wiping her face, then took off her boots before going to him, not wanting to shock him with the cold water that covered her.

His forehead was hot under her fingers as she smoothed his hair away from his face, calling him softly, when that didn’t work she shook him. His eyes shot open and he gasped as if he were drowning, then snarled as his hands went around her throat and for a moment, she was afraid.  _ <Kylo!> _

He gasped like she’d burnt him and then his hands moved to encircle her waist and he pulled her against him, holding her tightly as he murmured frantic apologies. It took him a while to come back from that, a while to realise she was wet, to comprehend she was in his room, even though the rain could be heard outside pelting the window.

“What are you  _ doing _ here?” he hissed, furious now.

Rey frowned down at him, “You were having a nightmare.”

An angry rumble came from his chest, “That hardly warrants risking your life, and you’re soaking, you could get ill again!”

Rey felt her jaw set, “It was bad, Kylo. You can’t tell me you wouldn’t have done the same.”

“I haven’t recently been ill with fever!” came his hissed retort. 

Rey growled in frustration stopping his mouth with a kiss, crushing her lips to his roughly, for a second he didn’t respond, trying to stay angry, but then he kissed her back. It wasn’t long before he was pulling her clothes off with frantic fingers and pulling her into bed and under the covers with him. He only had his boxers on, but Rey decided that was too much and pulled them down impatiently, letting him kick them off when they reached his ankles. His hot skin gliding over her cold body was everything she needed, his hands palmed her breasts, easing the hard peaks of her cold nipples and she moaned into his mouth as she wriggled against him so she could access his erection, sliding her hand up and down his hard length feeling heat coil deep inside her and clench in anticipation. 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Kylo was filled with desire but also still furious and he decided to combine the two. Once he had warmed Rey’s body up, he surprised her by sitting up and pulled her stomach down across his lap.

“What are you doing?” she asked curiously before he put a hand over her mouth and used the other one to smack her bare, pert bottom.

To his satisfaction she let out an outraged squeal,  _ <I told you not to come over the roof in the rain,> _ he paused to smack her again, this time having to move his hand from her mouth to keep her in place,  _ <be quiet or someone will hear, little scavenger. You could have fallen> _ smack,  _ <You could have gotten ill> _ smack, _ <Unless it’s a matter of life and death> _ smack,  _ <don’t do it again> _ smack. She wriggled against him as he caressed the heated skin of her behind softly,  _ <Is that clear?> _

_ <You are going to pay for this,> _ she was trying for threatening but it was spoiled by her obvious arousal. Kylo chuckled softly,  _ <Does the little scavenger like being spanked?> _ he asked as he slipped his fingers between her legs,  _ <My, my, aren’t you wet.> _  She whimpered as he caressed her.

_ <Let me up!> _ her command was rather weak and he ignored it, sliding his fingers against her before gently slipping one inside her. She gasped in surprise, before a low moan sounded in her throat. Kylo stroked her back as he continued, he decided he liked this position, although it was harder to reach her clit. Apparently that didn’t matter though, because she came, he felt the pleasure flood through the bond even as her body trembled in his lap.

With that flood any lingering memories of his nightmare dissolved, swept away. He sighed with relief and pulled Rey up and settled her against his chest, rearranging the covers over them both. With Rey’s release and and the eradication of his terror, sleep was pulling him down once more, and he could feel Rey coming with him, he had just enough time to mumble,  _ <Next time, use the bond,> _ before he was sucked under again, but with Rey in his arms, this time his sleep was peaceful.   

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from a song by Soul II Soul called Back To Life
> 
> I'm not dead. Life, the universe and everything has been a bit rough recently, so sorry it's taken me so long to update and also sorry it's just filler.  
> Hoping writing starts picking up again, also apologies for not replying to comments, I will try and rectify that too. ♥


	97. Awkwardness Ensues

 

The Falcon had been stopped and searched three times. Each time Han pulled over, he would tell Chewie to  _ be good and be calm _ . Chewie disliked the scent of the men who pawed through the van and asked Han questions, but they never behaved in a way he deemed to be threatening, so he had stayed still. They were sensible enough to give him a wide berth whenever they spied him, and he would give them the merest hint of lip curl as he gazed unblinking into their wary, wide eyes.

Apart from that, the journey had been nice, it was just he and Han, which meant Chewie could sprawl on the front seat if he wished, or lean his head out of the passenger window allowing the wind to ruffle his fur and flap his ears with abandon.

When they paused for breaks so Han could rest, Chewie would stay awake, keeping watch and guarding him as he slept, silently baring his teeth at anyone who got too close.

Chewie was concerned that in his absence the squirrels would have overrun the school, this meant that when they got back, he may have his work cut out for him and he wouldn’t be able to immediately collapse on his sofa. He loved his sofa. Leia did not. She was forever telling Han to get a new one, but Han always quietly promised Chewie he wouldn’t really get rid of it, once Leia had gone elsewhere.

It was morning when Han got a message to say the Leia, Luke and the pups were back home and safe. Han seemed deeply relieved and they celebrated by pulling over and getting doughnuts. Han made Chewie eat his outside the Falcon, but Chewie didn’t mind and he grinned as he happily chewed the sweet, jammy treat.

When they were back on the road, Chewie asked Han if Ben-pup and Rey-pup would share a room now that they had mated. To his surprise, Han yelled a shocked “They what?!” then started spluttering and had to pull over to the side of the road as he coughed.

When he had finally stopped not being able to breath normally, he looked at Chewie and gruffly told him to not mention it to anyone else.  _ Especially Leia. _

Chewie didn’t understand why. Han explained that if Leia found out, she would ‘ _ Rip Ben a new one _ ’ and she may never let Ben-pup and Rey-pup spend time together, ever again. He also muttered about having to have a  _ talk _ , (the way he said the word made it sound much more important than it’s usual meaning), with Ben when they got home. His scent was partly horrified,  embarrassed, awkward and proud. It was an odd mixture and made Chewie want to sneeze. 

Humans were such strange creatures, of course Ben-pup and Rey-pup had mated, why wouldn’t they? They belonged together, that much was obvious and he couldn’t understand why it would be wrong for them to mate.

The sun slowly became less intense the further north they went, Chewie was relieved - it had been unpleasant to be so hot and he had been very thirsty and he didn’t like the feel of the hot, dry earth under his paws, it had felt all wrong.

He welcomed the scent of fresh cool rain as they drove through the night, pausing for a couple of hours to rest before continuing on.

Chewie was happy when they he finally scented home, and it wasn’t long before they were driving up the winding drive and parking outside their beloved workshop.

They were home.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Rey was catapulted awake suddenly, to find that, a: they had overslept, b: she wouldn’t be climbing over the roof without being seen, but most importantly, c: she had just been poked awake by a rather startled Zainmar. She squeaked and ducked back under the covers.

“Well you guys have cocked up,” Zainmar said as Kylo groaned and sat up.

Rey peeked over the edge of the duvet to see the clock showed 10.30am, “Shit,” she muttered, mostly to herself.

Zainmar nodded, grinning, “Yup. I think you may be stuck here all day, Rey. I’m sure that doesn’t bother Kylo though.”

Kylo rolled his eyes at Zainmar, “Maybe we could get a little privacy, so we can get dressed at least?”

Zainmar left, chuckling to himself as he shut the door behind him, and Rey turned to look at Kylo, “What are we going to do? I can’t believe I slept so long!”

Kylo shrugged, not seeming to be unduly concerned, “You were really tired,” he said as he swung his legs onto the floor and got up to stretch before pulling on his boxers, “And then there was your little escapade over the roof in the rain.”

Rey glared at him as she stood and started pulling on her still damp clothing, “I was worried about you!”

Kylo pulled her t-shirt out of her hands and replaced it with one of his, “Like I said, next time, use the bond to wake me,” he paused and took her face in his hands, looking into her eyes, “You could have been hurt or gotten ill again. It was just a nightmare.”

Rey shook her head as much as his grip would allow, “It wasn’t _ just _ a nightmare, it was bad. So bad it woke me up, I couldn’t leave you alone like that!”

He huffed an exasperated sounding sigh and pulled her against him, “I know, but if you had fallen badly and died, you _ would _ have been leaving me alone,” Rey scoffed at that, but he carried on, “I know you’re good at climbing, but it was wet and dark and bad luck happens to everyone.”

She bit her lip, recalling the moment when she  _ had _ almost fallen, Kylo’s eyes flashed and she realised he had seen her thoughts.

“You see? Please, Rey. Don’t take risks like that again,” he voice was devoid of triumph at being right, and its lack took the wind out of her sails. 

She sighed in defeat, “Fine, I won’t do it unless it really is necessary.” Kylo gave her a flat look, “If a life is in danger or there is a fire or something,” she amended, “If it’s raining or icy.”

“Good,” he kissed her briefly then let her go so she could get his t-shirt on, “But what are we going to do now?”

“Fire alarm? Or a diversion of some kind? I’m guessing it’s a no to using our abilities?”

Kylo shook his head, “No abilities, and I don’t think fire alarm is a good idea…” he shot her a cocky grin, “We could just stay in here all day, Zain was right, I’d be fine with that.”

Rey rolled her eyes at him, “The girls will miss me, they’re moving onto my floor today and Mara will probably be supervising.” 

“Diversion it is then, I’ll go get the others,” he went out and Rey finished dressing, finger combing her hair before tying it up. Kylo’s t-shirt was huge on her, but at least she was known for wearing men’s clothing so hopefully it wouldn’t be noticed much.

Kylo returned with the Knights who all seemed to be amused by her predicament. They put their ear comms in, which strictly speaking, Leia had not requested they hand in.

“Okay, so Zain and Leonmar are on diversion, Jav is on point for clearing the stairs and Ingalan and I will walk you between us, which should help to shield you from sight from a casual glance,” Kylo informed her. They all looked excited, fully animated for a the first time since their return.

Rey hid a smile, there was something…  _ sexy _ , about the way Kylo took charge and planned things out, she nodded, “Sounds like a plan.”

“I’ll see if I can ask Poe and the others to wait at the bottom of the stairs so you can merge with the group,” Zainmar said over his shoulder as he and Leonmar left Kylo’s room.

“We missed breakfast didn’t we?” Rey asked sadly, she had been looking forward to that. 

“I’m afraid you did, but you’ll still be able to get something to eat from the kitchen, it is well stocked,” Ingalan told her helpfully. Rey just nodded.

It wasn’t long before they were moving, slipping down the stairs cautiously, she had Ingalan in front of her and Kylo behind, sandwiched between them as Javiell bullied anyone he came to downstairs to see ‘ _ Zain jump over two tables with an egg in his mouth _ ’.

“Is he really going to do that?” Rey asked doubtfully.

Ingalan laughed, “Probably. He is an idiot.”

“But he will probably make it all the same,” Kylo added, “He is really good at the long jump… he may however end up covered in egg, though.”

Miraculously it went off without Rey being seen and she was instantly engulfed by the girls at the bottom of the stairs, all of whom were giggling with glee at the ruse.

Poe shouldered them aside to hand Rey a mug of tea and she very almost kissed him, “Thank you,” she told him fervently.

“No problem, thought you’d need it,” Poe answered with a grin.

“Maybe go change before having food though?” Finn said as he patted her on the shoulder, “You have the worst bed head.”

“He’s not wrong,” Jess said with a grin, “Come on girlfriend, lets get you sorted and then we can start moving!”

It was either follow them or be dragged, so Rey went quietly, sending < _ See you for lunch? _ > to Kylo. 

< _ Of course. Hope you survive _ ,> his sending was distinctly amused… perhaps she should ask Jess to help her come up with a suitable response to the spanking incident last night. She felt her cheeks warm just thinking about it.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo made himself toast, drinking coffee as he waited for it to be done. That had been close. Too close, in future maybe he or Rey should set an alarm. It hadn’t been a problem before, but better safe than sorry, even so.

There was cheering from the common room and Javiell joined him, rolling his eyes, “He bloody made it,” he said as he helped himself to coffee. 

Kylo chuckled, “Even with the egg in tact?”

Javiell nodded, “Unbelievably, yes… So, your scavenger is busy, do you fancy going to the gym?” 

Kylo pulled his toast out and started covering it in marmalade, “Once this has gone down, sure, why not.”

Zainmar and Leonmar arrived, grinning widely, Leonmar stuffing a handful of credits into his jeans, “I’m a genius!” Zainmar crowed waving his arms in the air, then he mock bowed to Kylo, adding, “You’re welcome.”

Kylo huffed a laugh, “Thanks, and sorry I missed it. What did you do with the egg?” Just as he finished asking, Zainmar was hopping up to sit on one of the counters, and there was an audible crunch. Zainmar winced.

“He put it in his pocket!” cackled Leonmar.

Zainmar gingerly got back down and turned to look at his backside, “Ugh, blood and ashes, pass us the kitchen paper?”

Javiell, who wasn’t laughing as much as Leonmar, did so and Zainmar started trying to clean the mess up.

“Zainmar, why do you have raw egg all over you?” Mara asked in along suffering tone as she paused in the doorway.

“Ummm, because I sat on an egg?” Zainmar offered helpfully, Kylo choked on his toast.

Mara rolled her eyes, “Of course you did. Go upstairs and change, then bring your jeans straight to me. If they go in the wash we’ll get boiled egg over everything. Go on,” and she shooed him out of the kitchen, then stepped closer to Kylo, “Han and Chewie made it back this morning. I thought you’d like to know.” She patted his hand and then went into the common room.

“That’s good to know,” Javiell said quietly, and Kylo and Leonmar nodded.

“I’m just going to pop over and see him briefly, if he hasn’t passed out yet, gym afterwards?” Kylo asked as he put his plate and mug in the dishwasher. The other two nodded, “Cool, see you in a bit, then.”

It was still raining and Kylo nipped back upstairs to grab his coat before leaving for the workshop. He felt guilty, he had completely forgotten that his father and Chewie were coming behind them in the Falcon. He guessed they must be fine or Mara would have mentioned it, but he wanted to see them for himself, all the same. 

The last few weeks had seen a change in his relationship with his parents, and as he thought about it, he had to admit to a change in himself too. It was Rey. It was all Rey. She banished his nightmares, she ended feeling of being lost inside, from feeling weak and useless, he was no longer aimless. His purpose in life was her, keeping her safe and making her happy. With her and his brothers, he didn’t need his parents, but he wanted them now, wanted to see them, even if they drove him crazy, even if they reprimanded him for things that he  _ had _ to do, it was okay. He was okay.

 

He was almost at the workshop when the heavy pounding of paws made him look up just in time to brace himself for impact with a very wet, happy, ridiculously huge wolfhound.

“Chewie!” he half yelled, half laughed, as the dog leant against him, tail wagging madly. He pushed back at him, trying to encourage him somewhere drier, “Come on, let me get inside at least!”

Chewie huffed an aggrieved sigh, but stood up straight and trotted in front of Kylo as they made their way to the workshop and through the door.

Chewie and Kylo found Han and Luke in the office, before Kylo could sit, Chewie got up on the sofa and lay down with a happy groan, almost pushing Luke off in the process.

Luke stood with a smile, “I’ll take that as my cue, don’t stay up much later Han though, you looked wrecked, mate.”

Han snorted, “I’ve been called worse by better.”

Luke chuckled as he left and Kylo was suddenly pinned by a  _ look  _ from his father. Despite his dark circled, red rimmed eyes, it was a sharp look and Kylo unconsciously swallowed.

“Glad you got home safe,” Kylo said awkwardly, unsure what the look meant but fairly certain it couldn’t be anything good.

Han grunted and gestured to the sofa, “Sit, if you can. You and I have something to discuss.”

Chewie generously lifted his head so Kylo could sit, before dropping it back down to rest heavy in his lap, eyes fixed on Kylo, like Han’s were.

“Was there any-” Kylo started but Han cut him off.

“Chewie informed me that you and Rey have ma-…” he grimaced, “Have slept together. And I don’t mean just the sleeping.”

Kylo felt his mouth go as dry as the desert as his face grew as hot as it, even his ears burned as he darted his eyes away from Han’s and glared at Chewie, who remained supremely unbothered by the whole thing.

“Um…” Kylo said intelligently, he had absolutely no idea what to say to that… or how Chewie had known.

Han sighed and rubbed his face, “Please tell me you, you know, you used protection?”

Somehow Kylo’s face got hotter, he hadn’t thought it was possible, he muted the bond, “Err, yeah.”

A little of the tension went out of Han’s shoulders and he leaned back in his chair, which squeaked alarmingly but held.

“I know what you kids went through was tough, and I can imagine what you must have been feeling when you were reunited with Rey, but now you’re home, you can’t do  _ that _ again.”

Kylo frowned, he loved Rey, he could wait, of course he could, but not being able to be joined like that again? That made him ache inside.

Chewie sat up and growled at Han. It was a whiney, disapproving growl, but a growl all the same. Kylo’s eyebrows mirrored Han’s as they climbed into his hairline.

“They are just kids, Chew,” Han answered, frowning back at the dog, who told him off again. “No, humans only do that when they are grown up and sensible,” Chewie disagreed, and it turned into a surreal argument, “Yes, not all adults are sensible… That doesn’t matter!... Not on school property… No, no, I do not need grandpups anytime soon… Yes, of course I like Rey… That doesn’t matter, Ben and Rey can’t do that till they’ve left school… I know they are bonded, I understand that they are special… just let me finish!... Rey is special, and I am glad she and Ben are together, they just need to keep it in their pants till they finish school!”

Chewie snorted and rolled his eyes at Kylo, as if to say ‘ _ I tried! _ ’, Kylo patted his head, “S’okay, Chew. We’ll cope.” He couldn’t help wondering how on earth, Chewie had even known, but didn’t want to ask Han in case it increased the cringe factor, which was already the highest he could cope with.

“How was the journey home?” changing the subject seemed like a very good idea, “Was there any trouble?”

Han shrugged looking almost as uncomfortable as Kylo felt, “Nothing really, we got stopped and searched three times, but it was always over quickly. You kids really kicked the hornet’s nest,” he ended with a dry chuckle. 

Kylo nodded, “Have you or Luke heard anything about, err, you know, about Jabba?”

“Not yet, though I’ll check in with Maz and Lando after a nap, I’ll let you know if I hear anything,” his jaws cracked as he yawned, “Just so you know, you’re mother does not know about you and Rey…  _ you know _ . I won’t be telling her, so long as I am sure you two are abstaining, that clear?”

Kylo sighed but nodded reluctantly, Chewie made a disapproving huff, but Han ignored him, “All right then, now, off with you. I need to lie down before I fall down.”

Han patted his shoulder before pushing him in the direction of the door, Chewie got up and followed Kylo out.

When they reached the shelter of some larger bushes, Kylo rounded on Chewie, “Why did you have to go and tell him?” Chewie looked embarrassed and let out a whine.

Kylo sank down a little so he could look into the dogs eyes, “Would you tell Han if we did it again?”

Chewie rolled his eyes and grinned, laying a long lick over Kylo’s cheek, making him splutter, “So you’d keep our secret?” another grin, with a dip of the head for extra clarity.

Kylo ruffled Chewie’s ears, “Thanks buddy, you’re the best.” Chewie huffed in agreement.

  
  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my head, after Luke told Han he looked wrecked, all I could hear was Gollum / Sméagol saying, “Fat hobbit is always so polite.”  
> Also, it’s been too long since I posted, and I know it’s more apologies, but I’m still sorry, life is shite. X


	98. We Are Bound

Once Rey had quickly showered and dressed, she heading downstairs to rummage in the cupboards for food. She had left the girls to decide which rooms to have on their own, with promises to be back  to help as quickly as she could.

She located the cereal blocks that she had tried before, dumped them in a bowl and covered them with milk before leaning against the counter and shoving spoonfuls into her mouth. It was a far cry from the normal weekend repast, but it was food, it filled a hole.

It was still raining outside, the wind blowing it around, smacking the heavy drops into the windows with loud, wet little smacks. Was this normal? How long would the weather be this cold and wet? She missed the burn of the desert, the novelty of rain was now long gone.

Before going back upstairs she made herself another cup of tea, finding a large mug amongst the smaller ones and filling that up as much as was possible, before carefully walking back upstairs.

The bond told her Kylo wasn’t in the dorm and she figured he was probably in the gym, she wouldn’t mind joining him, but she got the feeling the girls would be upset if she did… and she had to admit that this was a bit of a milestone for her, even if she was a little unsure about it.

Rey’s room was the second one from the stairs, Jess had taken the one next to the stairs, Kenjad was on Rey’s other side and Maritan was next to Kenjad. They’d decided to leave the room next to the bathroom empty, as anyone in that room could be disturbed when others showered.

As Rey helped them carry their boxes and bags up,  _ how did they have so much stuff? _ She could feel a grin pulling at the corners of her mouth, despite the difficult start to the day, she was actually a little excited.

Mara bustled around making up beds and delivering extra towels to the bathroom, and little by little, the others rooms started to look like they belonged to someone.

“Wish Mara had allowed the boys up to help,” Kenjad moaned as she staggered up the stairs, her small frame supporting a box, that though not big, looked heavy.

Jess laughed, “I know! What are all those muscles for, otherwise?”

“Well, they do look good, but apart from that, they’re useless,” Maritan chipped in from behind a box in her arms.

Rey flitted about, assisting where needed until Kylo’s sending made her realised the time, < _ Do you guys know it’s gone 2pm? _ >

She came to a standstill and blinked in surprise, < _ No, we didn’t. Thanks, we’ll be down in a sec, but if you’re hungry go ahead of us. _ >

“Rey? Are you okay?” Kenjad asked and Rey blinked again, she had been helping Kenjad hang things in her wardrobe and was still holding a pair of jeans in her hands.

“I’m fine, but I just realised the time. If we want lunch, we should go soon.”

“Stars! I hadn’t realised!” Kenjad grabbed the jeans from Rey, “Go tell the others!”

Rey let Maritan and Jess know, then grabbed her coat from her room and jammed the wooly hat she had bought on their shopping trip, on her head. She had learned her lesson about rain, wind and hoods, there was no way in hell she was getting ill again.

“Awww, you look so cute!” Kenjad squealed as Rey came out of her room, doing up her coat.

“You really do,” Maritan said as she put on her own hat, which only had one fur pom pom on it, unlike Rey’s, which had two, placed so they looked like ears. Rey rolled her eyes as they hurried down the stairs. 

“We are close to being done, Rey-Rey. If you want to do more of your homework, we can handle the rest?” Jess asked, then made a disgusted noise as they got outside, “This is horrible!”

“Totally! Lets run!” Kenjad yelled into the wind and started off, Rey and the others following.

_ <On our way. I hate the north, _ > Rey sent Kylo as they ran towards the refectory, which was also into the wind. She ducked her face as much as she could, but it still got wet.

_ <I wasn’t too keen on the south,> _ came his dry response,  _ <Maybe when we leave school, we should just live in the core?> _

Rey tripped and almost face planted but Jess grabbed her arm and she righted herself, “Thanks,” she called as she started up running again, she caught Jess flash a grin.

Kylo’s words were bouncing around her head, she had never really looked to the future, or made plans, other than having second exits, hidden knives and emergency stashes…  _ We should live in the middle _ … Would that really happen? Would they stay together, she couldn’t imagine how they would live apart while bonded, but could something so wonderful really be in her future? A real future, a real life? The idea was almost frightening. She suppressed her feelings, pushing them down, before replying as casually as she could,  _ <I guess that would work.> _

They made it into the refectory, all breathless and dripping, wiping moisture from their faces before they picked up trays and chose food.

Despite the hat and coat, Rey was a little shivery and she picked some sort of meaty stew, with vegetables. 

The Knights were already eating, Poe and Finn were sitting with them but had finished their own meal and were just chatting.

“Hey Peanut!” Finn grinned at her as she slid into the empty seat next to Kylo, “Survived the run here?”

Rey grimaced as she pulled off her hat, “Just. Is the weather always like this?”

Kylo slid a deliciously warm hand up Rey’s thigh, as Poe chuckled as, “For the next few months, it’ll only get worse I’m afraid. Just wait till you see snow!”

“If she doesn’t like rain, I can’t see her liking snow,” Leonmar said.

“Of course she will!” Kenjad said, sounding as if she thought Leonmar was being dense, “Snow is pretty and doesn’t soak through your clothes or stop you from doing things! Snow is fun!”

“Ooo! We could have a massive snowball fight when it snows! Or try playing manhunt again!” Jess added, now as excited as Kenjad.

“What’s a snowball fight?” Rey asked, interested despite herself.

Kylo chuckled warmly, “Of course that would be the thing you latched onto.”

Rey dug one of her elbows into his ribs, he grunted a little in surprise then pulled her against him, “Careful,” he said softly in her ear, “Unless you want a repeat of last night.” 

Rey felt herself flush, < _ Still going to make you pay for that, shark boy! _ >

< _ You are welcome to try, any time, _ > he purred. He was infuriating.

“So basically you just get a handful of snow, make it into a ball and throw it at someone,” Finn was saying.

“A handful? Isn’t that really cold?” she asked, trying to ignore Kylo.

Finn shrugged, “Yeah, but if you have gloves on, you last a while. Just have to throw them real quick.”

“Snow does sound better than rain,” she admitted, before starting to eat.

“It is,” Leonmar said, “But, you fall over a lot, it’s difficult to drive in and it sometimes brings infrastructure to a stand still.”

“Oh,” was all Rey could say..

Finn rolled his eyes, “Yeah, but we’re at a boarding school, so not much of that matters.”

“It’s currently a moot point, either way,” Ingalan stepped in, “Let’s worry about all that when it actually snows, shall we?”

 

Rey and Finn slogged through more homework after lunch. Their concerted efforts meant they had managed about two thirds of the pile Mara had presented them with.

By evening, Rey had a headache and was desperately thinking of snuggling in her nest with Kylo and pretending tomorrow wasn’t Monday. At least there would be fencing tomorrow and no P.S.D or Critical thinking, that was something at least.

She and Finn both agreed that they’d do the rest of the work tomorrow or the next day, and Rey curled up on Kylo’s lap in the common room. It was still raining outside and her need to spend some time close to him outweighed her shyness of being so intimate in public. 

The Knights were playing cards, joined by Finn, Poe, Brobard and Shaadr. The girls were still upstairs, finishing off their rooms, Rey felt a little guilty for not helping, but right now there was no where else she would rather be… unless it was in bed with Kylo, that is… when had she become so needy? So dependant on him? Was this normal?

_ <You’re overthinking, little scavenger,> _ Kylo sent as he stroked her back soothingly,  _ <All you need to know, is that we are together, and that I crave you just as much, if not more, than you crave me. We are bound to one another, obviously that isn’t normal, but it doesn’t make it wrong or bad. We love each other, that is what matters - everything else pales and falls away in comparison to that.> _

There was a tightness in her throat and her eyes were burning as she tried to breathe and she hid her face against his warm chest, < _ How do you always know the perfect thing to say? How did a teenage boy become so eloquent? _ >

She could feel his smile through the bond, a flood of warmth, as he kissed her hair, < _ Because I’m talking about you, about us. _ >

She couldn’t resist lifting her head and capturing his lips with her own as she wound her arms around his neck. His cards fell forgotten on the floor as his hands came to rest firmly on her waist, thumbs stroking her sides beneath her clothes. They ignored the comments and catcalls of the others, lingering in their embrace, oblivious to the world outside, for a little while.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry it's short and filler, but also some fluff... Had Focus by Allie X in my head for some of this… this is later than it should be because I couldn’t think of any chapter title, stupid I know, but there it is… Thank you so much to everyone still along for the ride and for your patience with me being rubbish as posting. You guys are awesome and wonderful and clearly as weird as me.


	99. New Rooms and New Information

“Rey-Rey!” 

Kylo and Rey jerked apart as Jess, Kenjad and Maritan arrived at the sofa. “We’ve finished settling in, you need to come and see!” Kenjad exclaimed, bouncing on her feet and grinning.

“Sorry, Kylo, you can have her back later,” Maritan offered as Kenjad and Jess pulled at Rey’s arms and she stood up.

“Maybe,” Jess added with a mischievous grin.

Kylo rolled his eyes and folded his arms as Zainmar, Leonmar, Finn and Poe snickered.

Rey felt a smile pulling at her lips, “I’ll see you later,” she promised as she was hustled out of the common room.

< _ You better. You owe me a kiss goodnight, little scavenge _ r,> his sending was warm and deep. Rey shivered a little as she sent back, < _ I always pay my debts, Shark boy _ .>

“So, because this is basically our new home and stuff, we thought we should have a toast in honour of the occasion and Maritan has some Prosecco, which seemed appropriate. But first, you get the tour!” Jess said as they hurried up the stairs. Rey had no idea what Prosecco was but assumed it was alcohol of some kind.    

On the first door they came to was a sign with Jess’s name on in flowing blue script, Jess grinned as she thrust the door open with a dramatic “Ta-da!”

It had the same furniture as Rey’s room of course, the same layout, but it looked so different. Jess had a beautiful multicoloured fluffy blanket thrown over the standard white bedding, (which unlike Rey’s, was not on the floor,) the room was lit by two warm lamps with carved wooden bases and there were star shaped fairy lights around the head of the bed. The desk was already cluttered with school things and a poster of the periodic table was on the wall above it. Her chair had another colourful throw over it and there were posters on the walls of men in various states of undress… Rey had no idea who they were, it was a bit weird.

“It’s really cool,” Rey said awkwardly, it was more than cool, it was colourful and cosy and very Jess, but she felt too shy to say that.

Jess didn’t seem to mind though, “I know! I love it!” she beamed at Rey then tugged her hand, come on, Kenjad’s room next!”

Rey noticed there was another sign on Kenjad’s door, similar to Jess’s, before Kenjad excitedly  pushed it open.

Her room was brighter than Jess’s, lit by crystal mirrored lamps that refracted the light and made patterns on the walls. Her bed was covered in a crocheted blanket in pinks and purples and Rey was interested to see there was a stuffed rabbit toy sitting on Kenjad’s bed, (seeing it made her felt a little less silly for having her orange clad doll), along with several throw cushions that matched the blanket. Half Kenjad’s desk was taken up with make up, the rest held school things and a row of text boots were propped up by polished pink agate bookends. Long swags of shimmery purple, pink and silver material hung on either side of the curtains, the silver threads catching the light. There were only two posters on her wall, again of scantily clad men Rey didn’t know, then on the wall by the bed was a large collection of photos and postcards arranged in a large heart shape.

“So?” asked Kenjad, sounding a little anxious and Rey realised she had been too quiet as she took it all in.

“Oh, it’s really cool too!” she assured quickly.

Kenjad squealed, waving her hands up and down, “It is!” she gestured to Maritan and Jess, “I love these guys, but having our own space is actually really great!”

“It totally is! My turn!” Maritan sang as she drew Rey with her, again there was a pretty sign on it with her name on. 

Maritan’s room only had one lamp, but had many, many fairy lights, some heart shaped, some like roses and some just small and plain, the light they cast was soft and a little magical. There was a pale gold quilted throw over the bed adorned with an abundance of exotic birds perched amongst lush blossom trails. Photos were stuck to the wall above her neatly organised desk, along with a world map and several small pencil drawn pictures. There were some beautiful art posters on the walls, which looked like they were out of fairytales and a crystal mobile hung from the window, causing little flashes of light to appear around the room.

Rey smiled, “Again, it’s really nice,” she said to Maritan.

“Wait, there’s more,” Maritan said and turned off the lights, “Look up.”

Rey did as she was told and gasped to find glowing star shapes dotted over the ceiling, “Ooo,” she hadn’t meant to say that outloud, but it slipped out.

Maritan laughed as she switched the lights back on and handed rey a little bag and a piece of card, “These are for you, from us.”

Rey blushed, not knowing what to say as she turned the card over to find she had a sign of her own to put on her door, it was just a simple thing and yet it made her eyes burn and she had to clear her throat a little, “Thank you, I love it.”

Kenjad laughed, “Open the bag too, silly!”

Maritan nodded, “That’s the best bit!” Rey put her hand in the bag and came back out to find lots of pale plastic stars. “They’re like mine and glow in the dark, so even when it’s cloudy and rainy, you can still see the stars.”

Again, Rey didn’t know what to say, how to express herself, so she put the stars back in their bag, took a deep breath and pulled all three girls into a group hug.

“Oh my stars!” Kenjad cried, “You initiated a hug!”

“I’m guessing that means you really like the stars,” Jess said happily.

“And the sign,” Rey said, voice a little muffled by Maritan’s hair, “The sign is great too.”   

They pulled apart and Maritan produced a bottle of what must be the Prosecco they’d mentioned earlier, “Let’s drink it in your room, Rey. We can put up your sign, too.”

“Ooo, yes!” Kenjad said, “Me and Mari haven’t seen your room properly yet!”

Rey shifted a little, suddenly awkward, “I haven’t really done anything to it, it’s not like your rooms.”

Jess waved a hand, “That doesn’t matter, and they are dying to see your famous nest!”

_ What the… Famous nest? _ “Okay,” Rey said doubtfully.

They paused in front of her door so she could stick the sign on it, which seemed to make the other three as happy as she felt.

“Now we all match!” Jess grinned, “You should do a no entry sign, Mari, for the top of the stairs.”

“You made the signs?” Rey asked curiously.

Maritan nodded, cheeks pink, “Yes, I really like art, though I’m not very good at it.” Kenjad and Jess immediately disagreed, rolling their eyes.  

“Nuh-uh, you are way good at it!” Insisted Kenjad.

“None of that, Mari, you’re amazing,” Jess said, then gestured to Rey, “You should do the honours.”

It took Rey a second to understand, then she pushed her door open and turned on her light. Her room looked so plain and utilitarian… but she loved it all the same. She felt her shoulders relax a little, her room may be different to the others, but it was hers and it still made her happy every time she stepped foot in it or woke up in it.

“Aww, your nest is so cute!” Kenjad said.

“Isn’t it cold sleeping on the floor though?” Maritan asked, looking concerned.

Rey shrugged, “A bit, but if I wear a hoodie it’s okay, or… well, if Kylo’s here it’s fine then, too.”

Jess cackled, “I bet it is! Now make with the Prosecco!” she produced some plastic cups from somewhere, “Not great I know, but the best I could do, the kitchen is sorely lacking in appropriate glassware.”

Maritan popped the cork, it took her a couple of tries but she got there and giggled as fizzy liquid bubbled out and Jess caught it in a cup.

Once they all had a cup, Jess raised hers to the middle of the circle they stood in and everyone else mirrored her, “To great friends and new rooms!”

The touched their cups together, “I wished they clinked, I like it when they clink,” Kenjad said with a pout.

Maritan smiled, “Me too, but it’s not too bad, before we drink though, I’d like to add to the toast,” she held her cup up again and the others followed, “Here’s to Rey and the others getting home safely.”

“Thank the light,” Jess said, nodding as they bumped cups once more.

“And the stars,” Kenjad added.

Rey remained quiet, thinking of all the people that had made it possible for her to get home, she took a cautious sip of the bubbly liquid, her nose wrinkled in disgust, it was gross, somehow it tasted like cat pee smelled.

“Not a fan?” Kenjad asked. Rey blushed and shook her head, relieved when they laughed and weren’t offended.

“It’s not everyone's cup of tea,” Jess laughed as Rey handed her her cup, “Just means there is more for us!”

“Speaking of tea, I’m just going downstairs to grab a cup, but I’ll come back up,” she needed something to get that awful taste out of her mouth.

“Okay, but no dawdling!” Jess told her retreating back.

The kitchen only had a few people in it and Rey got her tea brewing quickly. If anything, the weather seemed to indicate that the wind and rain had worsened, hopefully tomorrow would be better, it was all so depressing.

“Scavenger.” 

Rey turned with an inward sigh, those still in the kitchen scuttling out of it as Hux walked towards her.

“Hux,” she acknowledged.

He nodded, though at what she wasn’t sure, “I have some information you will want… but it comes with a price.”

_ Of course it did _ , Rey rolled her eyes, “I’m not interested, Hux.”

A look of irritation flitted across his pale face, “Trust me, you are, it’s about our trip south.”

Rey folded her arms and tried gently brushing his mind, but the block was still there, she could sense nothing. She shrugged and turned to pour her tea, “Even if it turns out to be something I want to know, I’m not inclined to pay you for anything.”

“Jabba the Hutt is dead,” his silky voice said close to her ear and she turned back around, trying to keep her feeling of victory from showing on her face. 

< _ Are you okay _ ?>

Kylo must have felt her excitement, < _ Fine, where are you? _ >

< _ Games room _ .>

< _ I’ll come find you in a bit. _ >

She couldn’t take Hux’s word for it, this would have to be verified. She found him too close for comfort, staring down at her with those cold eyes that somehow also burned.

“I have more information about it, but that will cost you,” he told her as he searched her eyes for a reaction.

She could ask Han or Luke to confirm this, but, well by all accounts, Hux did seem to have access to data that wasn’t readily available… “What’s the price?” she asked, teeth gritted a little.

The corners of hir lips turned up ever so slightly, “One dance, with me, on Saturday.”

Rey almost laughed,  _ was he serious? _ “No deal.”

Hux’s lips lost their curve, “Trust me when I say, you’ll want to know this.”

Rey shrugged again, “Perhaps, but you are not the only source of information.”

Hux shook his head, “ I doubt any of the teachers will know what I know, it isn’t being reported on.”

“I don’t care. I am not dancing with you, ever,” she took a casual sip of her tea, “Now get out of my way.”

There was a delay of a few seconds, but he did as she asked. As she walked away, he added, “You were lucky not to be caught this morning, you should be more careful.”

_ How the fuck did he know that? _ Rey clenched her jaw but didn’t respond, it was probably what he wanted.

As she made her way back upstairs, she spoke to Kylo,  _ <News is that Jabba is dead, but the source is suspect, have you seen Luke or Han?> _

She felt his shock, followed by understanding,  _ <How do you know? Han said he’d come by if he heard anything, but it’s possible he forgot.> _

Rey grimaced, knowing he wouldn’t like this,  _ <Hux just told me, but wouldn’t give me details.> _

Sure enough, she felt a wave of anger from him,  _ <How? I thought you were upstairs!> _

_ <Calm down, Kylo. I popped down to make some tea, I’m on my way up again now.> _

There was a pause as Kylo’s emotions fluctuated, before he sent, < _ There is still time before curfew, I’ll go and visit Han now. _ > He sounded a little more balanced at least.

Rey felt her shoulders relax a little, < _ Okay, don’t get too wet.> _ Her reply was a feeling of indignance.

 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo and the Knights had moved to the games room and were playing pool when Rey contacted him.

“What’s wrong with you?” Zainmar asked when Kylo accidentally swore out loud. Kylo glared at him, which was unfair, but he couldn’t help it right now.

“I’d say he was having a chat,” Ingalan said meaningfully as he made his way around the table and blocked others from view. Kylo absently nodded his thanks as he finished talking to Rey.

Then he sighed and rubbed his face, “Hux just told Rey that Jabba is dead,” he told Ingalan softly as the others carried on playing as if nothing odd were going on.

Ingalan frowned, “Hux being the bearer of good news? That seems suspect.”

“Indeed. As well as the fact that he told Rey, rather than one of us. He was in here with us for the last half hour.”

“Will you go and see if Han knows anything?” Ingalan asked and Kylo nodded, “I’ll come with you, it will look weird if you go out in this sort of weather alone. The others can stay here and keep tabs on Hux.” 

They quickly gave an explanation to the others then made their way up stairs to collect their coats.

“Leia took his phone,” Kylo muttered as they climbed, “So how is he getting his information now?”

“I have no idea. He may have a spare one in his room, he could have taken the chip out of the one Leia took, before he gave it to her…” Ingalan’s frown had deepened.

“Or,” said Kylo unhappily, “Someone managed to get another one to him, which could mean that there is someone else on campus who knows more than they should.”

“Either way, it’s troubling,” Ingalan said as they parted on their floor to get their coats.

 

They were halfway down the stairs when they ran into Luke, who looked a lot less tired than when they last saw him. “Back upstairs, gentlemen,” he instructed with a wave of his hand.

Kylo and Ingalan traded a look as they turned and made their way back up to Kylo’s room.

Luke shut the door behind him and took Kylo’s chair while Kylo and Ingalan sat on the bed.

“Is this about Jabba?” Kylo asked as Luke settled himself.

Luke’s eyebrows raised briefly before descending into a frown, “Yes, he is dead... How did you know?”

Kylo curled his lip, “Hux just told Rey but wouldn’t give her any details. We were just on our way to see Han.”

Luke’s eyebrows stayed where they were, “That is… concerning. Han is still sleeping and I didn’t wish to wake him. The details of Jabba’s death are still coming in, but it is being widely reported to have been an inside job, whether or not it was the Fett’s, has not been mentioned, and nothing has come through about whether the killers escaped or not.”

Kylo leant back against the wall as relief flooded him, “But that is still good. He can’t send any more people after Rey, she’s safe from him at least.”

Luke smoothed his face a little, “He cannot, no… but,” he looked at Ingalan, then at Kylo as if he were considering his words carefully, “I find it disturbing that what Rey did, possibly worked.”

Kylo shook his head, “I don’t see why. Jabba had her kidnaped and collared as a  _ fucking slave _ , he deserved everything he got.”

“I am not disputing that what Jabba did was bad, Ben. What concerns me, is the level of power that compelling someone to take the life of another, would take. It is dangerous, and could so easily be misused.”

Kylo opened his mouth on an angry retort but it never left his lips. They had already been tempted to misuse the abilities they had, and because they still didn’t know the truth about Rey’s abduction, they may end up needing to do things that Luke and his parents would frown on… but he would keep Rey safe, by  _ any means necessary.  _

“This mind trick thing you do,” Luke said carefully, “Have you tried it on Hux?”

Kylo blinked in surprise, his eyes slid to Ingalan who gave him a slight nod, “Yes,” he admitted, “It seemed to work, but we couldn’t read his mind, there was a barrier of some kind that blocked us. We haven’t come across anyone else with that sort of thing and while I think I could break through it, it would hurt him.”

Luke leaned forward on his chair, “Does Rey have this block? Could Hux have something akin to your abilities?” Ingalan snorted slightly, then looked a trifle embarrassed.   

Kylo shot him a smirk before saying, “She doesn’t, but with the bond, I wouldn’t know if she did or not.”

Luke nodded, “Try me.” Kylo’s jaw hit the floor and Luke smiled a little, “Just have a go.”

After swallowing several times, Kylo reached out to Luke’ mind. It wasn’t as calm a place as he assumed it would be, or as easy to read as other peoples, (apart from Hux), but he got in without difficulty.

“I can feel you there,” Luke said softly, his surprise and not a little dismay echoing in his mind as Kylo withdrew, “So we must assume that Hux either has the same level of abilities as you and Rey, or something else is blocking his mind.”

“Hux got stabbed when we were in Tatooine,” Ingalan said into the silence, “If he had Rey’s or Kylo’s abilities I would have thought that in the heat of the moment he would have used them somehow, but we never saw any evidence of them.”

“I can feel the sensitivity in you and Mum,” Kylo added, “I’ve never felt anything from Hux.”

“So it has to be an external force causing the barrier,” Ingalan said with conviction and Kylo nodded.

“Which is much worse,” Luke said, and as Kylo thought about it, he realised that Luke was right. Someone had been feeding Hux information, Hux had been sending someone reports whilst in the south, and someone had blocked his mind from being read, as if they knew that that was a possibility...

Ingalan articulated the conclusion Kylo had just reached, “So Hux is involved with the person that ordered Rey’s kidnap?”    

And the beast, who had been muttering darkly for the last half hour, ripped its way out of its cage with a roar.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, thank you, for your comments, although I’m not replying at the moment, I really appreciate them and will try to reply soon. Next chapter just needs editing then it’ll be ready to go. ♥


	100. Well Slowly, But Clearer Now

 

“Are you okay, Rey? You seem a bit distracted?” 

Rey looked up at Maritan to find Kenjad and Jess also looking at her. Kylo’s fluctuating emotions were making it hard to concentrate on where she was, so she muted the bond, telling herself he’d let her know what was going on later.

“Yeah, sorry. Had a run in with Hux when I went down for tea, he somehow knew I was in Kylo’s room last night, but I don’t know how.”

“Ugh, he is such a creep,” Kenjad said, then took a sip of her Prosecco as if trying to get a bad taste out of her mouth.

“Well, he can’t prove anything, and if he hasn’t told Mara by now, I doubt he will,” Jess said, frowning, “But it’s weird he hasn’t dobbed you in, did you like, bond while you were away?”

Rey choked on her tea and Maritan gently patted her on the back, when she had finished spluttering, she shook her head, “ _ Hell, no _ . He was useful, I’ll give him that, but no, we did  _ not _ bond.” She knew Jess didn’t know about her bond with Kylo, but that was where her brain had taken her, the idea was abhorrent. 

Kenjad pouted, “I wish you could tell us what really happened - I know you’re not allowed to, but I hate not knowing and it means if you need to talk about it, you can’t.”

Rey gave her a reassuring smile, “It’s okay, we all have to have sessions with Leia.” She didn’t add that she wasn’t looking forward to the sessions, she didn’t relish talking about what happened, she would far rather ignore it. 

“Oh, that’s good,” Maritan said, “I’m glad you’ll have a woman to talk to, I can’t imagine the boys would be much good to talk to.”

The others laughed, though Rey thought they were being a little unjust, Finn and Kylo at least, were good at talking about things, they were definitely better than she was.

“Anyway, you up for a swimming lesson after classes on Tuesday?” Jess asked with a grin.

Rey nodded, “That would be great, thanks.”

“Ooo, we should play games again on Friday!” Kenjad said excitedly, “It’s been ages since last time and it won’t matter if it’s raining.”

“I’m in,” Jess said and she and Kenjad both looked at Rey and Maritan.

Rey grinned at the idea, games sounded good - doing something so normal and carefree was probably what they all needed, “That sounds awesome.”

Maritan smiled, “I’ll join you, but I may sit some of it out, you lot get a bit rough sometimes.”

Jess laughed at that, though Rey felt a little needle of guilt and decided to quietly ask the knights to be gentle if they went after Maritan.

They chatted about the dance, Rey mostly listening as Kenjad and Maritan tried to decide who they wanted to go with and how to get them to ask them. This confused Rey somewhat, why did it need to be the boy that asked the girl? What was wrong with a girl asking?

Kenjad and Maritan looked horrified when she voiced these thoughts and Jess fell about laughing, but Rey never got an explanation as to why, because she felt Kylo  _ explode.  _

The fury that poured through the bond had her up on her feet and running out of her room before she had a conscious thought, as the others called to her in alarm she shouted something over her shoulder to them, but wasn’t cognizant of what words she used.

As she flew down the stairs, shoving anyone in her path aside, she called to Kylo through the bond, but had no reply. It was almost as if he weren’t there, but she could feel him, he was upstairs. Ignoring Mara, Rey raced up the boys stairs, again shoving past anyone in her way, deaf to their angry protests.

She met Kylo as he burst out of his bedroom door with Ingalan and Luke desperately trying to stop him. His eyes were all pupil, the snarl on his face all beast.

“Kylo!” there was the merest of hesitations as his eyes focused on her, then a growl rumbled deep in his chest and he renewed his efforts against Luke and Ingalan. There was no reasoning with him right now, and she wouldn’t make much different in helping them hold him down either, she could try a choke hold but doubted if she’d be able to get a lock on him… Rey raised her hand, and pushed darkness on him. For a few seconds, it didn’t work, he fought it, his growl deepening, then his eyes slid shut and he went boneless. Surprised by the sudden deadweight, Luke and Ingalan went down with him. 

“ _ Rey White! _ Get downstairs this instant, young lady!”

Rey turned, shocked to see Mara behind her, breathing hard but clearly furious. Rey swallowed nervously.

“It’s okay, Mara,” Luke said tiredly as he righted himself, “I  need her up here for a bit, I’ll make sure she comes down soon.”

Mara huffed, her anger leaving her as she saw Kylo out cold on the floor, still partly on top of Ingalan, “Well, alright,” she chewed her lip, “I’ll send the other Knights up, shall I?”

Luke nodded, “That may be a good idea, thank you,” he paused to as he looked at her intently before saying, “Please can you search Armitage’s room for a mobile phone or any other tech device,” Mara nodded tightly, and left. 

Luke looked at Rey, “This is what you did to the Fetts’?” Rey nodded, “Let’s get him in his room, it may be prudent not to wake him just yet.” He helped Ingalan up and they took Kylo under the shoulders.

“Wait,” Rey said and they paused, perhaps now wasn’t the best time to try this but… Rey centred herself and took a calming breath in as she concentrated and lifted her hands. Kylo’s body shifted, and she pushed out her right hand, using it to help focus her, and his body rose slowly up before she directed it to float in front of her through his door and into his room. She was only vaguely aware of Luke and Ingalan stepping out of her way.

When Kylo was a few inches above his bed, she let go, sagging onto his chair, feeling sweat bead on her forehead as she breathed deeply.

“I didn’t know you could do that,” Luke said quietly, voice a little strained.

Rey shook her head, “Neither did I… Well, I knew it may be possible, but I’ve not tried it before.”

“Kylo shoved two guards off their feet into a wall when we were in Tatooine, and he’s stopped bullets a couple of times,” Ingalan offered.

Rey felt her eyebrows raise, Kylo hadn’t told her that, Luke looked rather disturbed, but she wasn’t sure why, and for now, it didn’t matter, “What happened?”

Luke sighed and rubbed his face, “Well-” he was cut off as the other Knights burst into the room.

“What’s going on?” Zainmar demanded as Javiell and Leonmar looked around the room as if they expected to find enemies lurking in the corners.

Luke sighed again, “Shut the door and sit down.” His tone was firm and everyone did as they were told, Rey giving up the chair for him and sitting on the floor.

Luke eyed them seriously once they were settled, “Jabba is dead,” they all nodded, “No mention has yet been made of the Fett twins,  _ or _ ,” his gaze got sharper, “Of any connection to the attack on his compound by a group of Jawa’s.”

Rey frowned at him, this couldn’t be what sent Kylo off the deep end, if anything she would have thought he’d be pleased that Jabba was dead and gone.

“After we talked about the news,” Luke paused, “We discussed how Hux could have known about Jabba,” he paused again, as if he were choosing his words very carefully, “It may be possible that Hux is… _ involved _ with whomever it was that took Rey in the first place.”

Zainmar, Leonmar and Javiell exclaimed in outrage, asking questions and throwing around suggestions as to what to do with Hux.

Rey didn’t really hear them, they sounded as though they were far away, there was a ringing in her ears as she considered the idea that Hux was working for the person responsible for her kidnap. Was that why his mind was blocked? Had he done it himself or was it done  _ to _ him?

The sound of her name pulled her attention back to room, “... Rey put him to sleep as we weren’t able to contain him,” Luke was saying, “Now you’re all here, it may be a good idea to wake him up.” He turned to Rey, “Do you need to do it or can anyone wake him?”

Rey shrugged, “Anyone, I think, just be careful, he’ll probably wake up angry.”

Luke gave her a wry look and she blushed, she really hadn’t needed to point that out. Everyone stood up and organised themselves, ready to jump on Kylo should the need arise.

“It may be best if Rey wakes him up, though,” Ingalan said from the bottom of the bed, holding on to one of Kylo’s legs, “She may be able to calm him better.” Luke nodded and Rey went to kneel by Kylo’s head.

“Everyone ready?” Luke asked and they all nodded, “Okay, Rey, go ahead.”

The audience made her feel little awkward as she softly patted Kylo’s cheek, he barely stirred, Leonmar snorted softly, “He won’t break, Rey.”

Rey pushed her irritation down and shook Kylo with more vigor as she shouted at him through the bond.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo went from darkness to wakefulness abruptly, his cheek stung as if he had been slapped, he registered Rey in his line of sight but the beast took control and he surged up from where he lay; it was determined to hunt down that weaselly, scheming bastard and rip through his mind till they got the information they needed.

He didn’t get far before the Knights bundled onto him, holding him down with their combined weight as he snarled with frustration.

< _ Kylo, _ > Rey’s voice echoed through his mind, reaching the boy inside the beast, he felt her pushing calm into him, < _ You need to rein in your anger, you need to come back to us. _ >

It was a struggle and it took time, but he managed it, when next he spoke, the snarl was gone from his voice as he wearily said, “Okay, I’m back.”

Ingalan’s face came into view, and nodded, “Let him up.”

The weight and pressure left his body and he sat up, leaning back against the wall as he looked at everyone. It wasn’t just the Knights, Luke was there, as was Rey - how was she here? In the boys dorm?

_ <I felt your fury like a volcano erupting, there was no way I wasn’t going to come to you,> _ the warmth of her sending calmed him further.

“It’s late,” Luke said, “Rey, you need to go back to your dorm, thank you for your assistance.”

The beast murmured in disagreement as Kylo and Rey looked at each other, dismayed at the idea of parting, but Luke’s face was set - he wouldn’t be persuaded otherwise.

Kylo brushed his hand with Rey’s as a goodbye, not wanting to kiss her in front of Luke, she gave him a strained smile.

“Before you leave though, let me make it absolutely clear, to  _ all of you _ , that you will leave Hux alone,” Luke’s voice was deadly serious, “He will be dealt by Leia and I, and if I hear that you have taken matters into your own hands, you will live to regret it.” 

Kylo was sure his incredulous expression mirrored everyone else's, apart from Rey’s which had gone blank; but he could feel her frustration, hissing and spitting through the bond.

“Is that clear?” Luke asked and they all nodded, though reluctantly. “Good, off you go now, Rey.”

She brushed his hand once more before swiftly leaving, shutting the door behind her. 

Luke looked at Kylo again, “I mean it, Ben. Stay away from Hux. We don’t know if Hux really is involved for certain, and if he is, it may not be willingly. We need to tread quietly and carefully, if he is involved, we don’t want him, or whoever he is working for, to know we know.”

Kylo nodded, but it left a bitter taste in his mouth. They may not have evidence, but there was no doubt in his mind that Hux was part of this, there was too much coincidence for it not to be true.

“I will leave you now. Get to bed, lessons tomorrow will probably be a bit of a shock to your system after last week, a good night’s sleep will do you all good.”

The Knights sat down as they waited for Luke to be gone before Leonmar produced a bottle of Firewhiskey and they passed it round.

“What knocked me out?” Kylo asked as he waited for the bottle to reach him.

Ingalan looked surprised, “You don’t remember? Rey did something, sort of waved her hand and you went out like a light.”

< _ Did you use the force to put me to sleep? _ >

If anything Rey seemed amused by his indignation, < _ Yes. We couldn’t contain you without the other Knights. Are you okay? Your mirror self did it to me once, so I think it isn’t dangerous or has any side effects. _ >

Kylo snorted and folded his arms, < _ I’m fine… well, in body anyway. I can’t believe Luke won’t let us interrogate Hux. _ > he nodded to Javiell as he accepted the bottle and took a swig, relishing the burn as it went down his throat.

< _ We’ll see... none of us promised verbally, we only nodded _ .>

Kylo let loose a chuckle, < _ That is pushing it, little scavenger, and I think Luke is right about one thing - we don’t want tip of whoever's in charge, it may prove useful to know and they not know that we know. _ >

There was a sensation as if she were sighing, < _ That is worth considering,> _ she conceded, _ <got to go, I have some awkward explanations to give _ .>

He sighed in discontent, once again hating the fact that school kept them apart. The beast was back in it’s cage, but it was restless without her being with him, where he could keep her safe. The rain still dashing against the window outside made it clear they would be sleeping alone again tonight.

He and the Knights ended up playing cards and drinking firewhiskey, they were too amped up with what they had concluded about Hux, to be able to relax.

 

< _ I miss you _ ,> Rey’s sending was tired and frustrated, < _ I hate this stupid weather.. _ .>

Kylo sensed her considering climbing over to his room anyway, and he growled, < _ Don’t you dare _ ,> he told her firmly, < _ Or you won’t sit down for a week _ .>

Her outrage, tinged with some embarrassed warmth came to him as she challenged, < _ And what makes you think I’d let you? _ >

Kylo felt himself smile a little, < _ Oh, trust me, little scavenger, I’d get it done, by hook or by crook, I’d mete it out till you learned your lesson. _ >

< _ Always so sure and so arrogant, _ > her voice purred in his head, < _ I would have thought you’d learned by now that I am more than your match _ .>

Kylo felt his smile grow wider, < _ That wasn’t how it appeared last night, _ > he could feel his cock stirring as he thought about it and had to shift his position on the floor.

< _ Don’t be silly, I could have got away from you if I’d wanted to, _ > she sent stubbornly.

< _ Well if you didn’t want to get away that must mean that you liked it. Did you like being held down and spanked? Is my little scavenger a bit kinky? _ >

There was a pause, then, < _ You are a git-wizard, Kylo Ren _ .>

< _ And you love it, Rey White.> He could feel her rolling her eyes, <How did your explanation go? Was it for the girls? _ >

< _ Yes, I had to explain to them why I suddenly bolted out of the room we were in and invaded the boys dorm. It was uncomfortable and they now think I’m telepathic or something, which is worryingly close to the truth. Unfortunately Mari remembered the library fire and decided I must have heard the children in there telepathically, the more I denied it, the more certain they became and I just had to give up _ .>

< _ Well shit. _ >

< _ I know. But I don’t think they will tell anyone, they were kind of excited to keep it a secret, _ > the fondness in her voice was clear. 

Kylo smiled to himself a little, glad she wasn’t alone on her floor anymore, that she had girls she could go to if she needed someone in the night.

Now his body was relaxed, sleep finally started tugging on his mind and he and the Knight’s ended their game and said goodnight.

It was a little chilly in bed alone and he pulled a blanket out from under the bed and snuggled down again. < _ I miss you too, but I’ll see you for breakfast in just a few hours,> he sent drowsily, <Sleep tight, little scavenger and dream of me _ .>

< _ You too, Shark Boy, _ > drifted through his mind before sleep finally took him.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title taken from The Crowing by Coheed and Cambria, alos kinda had these in my head, Losing Control by Aviators and New Blood by Zayde Wolf.  
> So, that was chapter 100, kudos and love if you made it this far with me ♥ You may have noticed that we now have a final chapter count, but this is tentative and may change...  
> Next chapter may not be for a few days, sorry!


	101. Abstinence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

 

Rey woke early. It was still dark outside and she could hear the wind and rain lashing against the window. It was 4am, but she was wide awake and knew she wouldn’t be going back to sleep now. It was a little strange to know that the rooms on either side of her were no longer empty. She quietly rummaged around for her goggle lamp, then wrapped herself in a blanket and tackled some of her remaining homework. She felt a little bad about doing it without Finn, but perhaps this way he could just copy what she did, which at least meant it would go quickly for him. Once the clock hit 7am, she decided it was probably okay to have a shower without disturbing the others too much and slipped softly out of her room.

 

“Rey-Rey!” Kenjad squealed as Rey got out of the shower, “It’s our first morning together!”

Rey felt a smile tugging at her lips, “I didn’t wake you, did I?”

“Nah,” Kenjad laughed as she disappeared into a cubicle, “I was getting up anyways, takes me ages to get ready!”

Rey wasn’t quite sure what exactly, took ages, but didn’t stay to ask as she was later than usual and wanted to have some tea before facing the weather outside.

As she dressed she was grateful all over again that Jess had found her leggings when they’d been shopping - tights would be utterly useless in this weather.

Poe was already down in the reading room with a very happy looking BB8 on his lap, “Good morning,” he said cheerfully as she walked in and settled in the chair she liked.

BB8 raised his head to chirrup at her but stayed where he was, “Morning,” Rey answered with a sigh as she sipped her tea, “Has he forgiven you for being awol?”

Poe nodded, looking relieved as he stroked the little cat, “Just this morning, and now I’m not sure he is going to let me go to breakfast.”

BB8 had been very upset whilst Poe was away, even though the others had taken care of him, he’d apparently gone off his food and pined the whole time Poe was gone, then been standoffish when he’d returned. 

Rey smiled as she felt Kylo just before he appeared with a mug of coffee, he looked grumpy but that was probably just because it was early in the morning.

Kylo nodded at Poe then gestured at Rey, “You need to stand up.”

Rey frowned, “Why?” she asked, a little puzzled.

Kylo sighed, “Just stand up, please?”

Rey got up and Kylo plonked himself down in her chair, “Hey!” she said indignantly, then squeaked as Kylo pulled her onto his lap. It was lucky she had finished her tea by then.

< _ I didn’t get the kiss goodnight you promised me, _ > he sent as he kissed her thoroughly.

Rey melted into him, it had been too long since she touched him, it didn’t matter that it had been less than a day, it was still too long.

“Bloody ashes you two, get a room!” Leonmar muttered and they reluctantly pulled apart.

Rey was blushing but Kylo just looked irritable, “If we could, we would,” he answered flatly as Leonmar threw himself down in a chair.

“Did you not sleep well?” Rey asked quietly, “I didn’t feel you wake up.”

Kylo shrugged and picked up his coffee, “I didn’t, I didn’t have nightmares but just loads of weird dreams and I feel like I didn’t sleep at all. What about you?”

Rey shrugged, “Woke at four, but that isn’t unusual for me, at least, when I sleep alone anyway.”

Kylo nodded, “We sleep better together…” < _ maybe it’s a bond thing? _ >

Rey shrugged again and snuggled against him, < _ Could be, I don’t think we have any way of knowing, though. _ >

 

They all ran to the refectory. It was a fairly miserable atmosphere inside, everyone was wet and more depressed than normal for a Monday morning.

Rey opted for porridge, everyone else seemed to want something hot too and the cereal bar was deserted.

< _ So what are we going to do about Hux? _ > she asked as she ate.

Kylo sighed next to her and shook her head as he ran his hands through his damp hair, < _ I don’t know, _ > he sent, his frustration and anger clear. 

Rey could feel his emotions start to turn dark and unstable and she squeezed his hand under the table, < _ We’ll figure something out, and at least we know now, and he doesn’t know we know so he won’t know we’re watching him _ .>

Kylo’s shoulders relaxed, a tiny, tiny bit anyway, and he squeezed her hand back, < _ I know… we should tell Finn and Poe, too. We can trust them and the more eyes watching Hux the better _ .>

Rey struggled to keep her surprise off her face - she had been going to suggest the same thing, but had not expected Kylo to be okay with that… Perhaps their shared experiences on the trip South had created a fellowship of sorts, they had had to trust each other with their lives… that thought led naturally onto Hux of course and she stopped thinking, now was not a good time.

< _ I’ll tell Finn and either you or he can fill in Poe, whoever gets to him when he is on his own first. _ >

At least Hux was in a different year to them, it would make watching him harder, but it also meant it would be easier for none of them to snap and do something that would tip Hux off. She’d probably have to slip into the cold place when she next saw him, or she may just try and rip her way into his mind and damn the consequences.

 

The morning went slowly, after the excitement of the last few days, being back in a classroom again was almost as bad as the Fett’s van. Rey was relieved once the bell for lunch rang and she and Finn almost ran out of history.

“I’m not sure I’ll survive the afternoon,” Finn announced dramatically as they walked briskly to the refectory, “Everything is so horribly normal, it’s weird.”

Rey nodded, “I know, but it’ll get better and at least we have fencing later.”

Finn rolled his eyes, “You like that more than I do. It’s less enjoyable when you are constantly losing.”

Rey nudged him with her shoulder, “We can practice after lessons if you like? I don’t know much but it may help.”

“Yeah, if you wouldn’t mind, that would be cool,” he said with a smile, then lowered his voice, “I’m more of a gun man, really.”

Rey smiled, “So I’ve heard… speaking of which,” she stopped and pulled him into an empty classroom, “There is something you should know and you really are not going to like it, but you have to promise to keep cool.”

Finn’s eyebrows raised, “Is this something to do with last night? Why you legged it into the boys dorm? I’d been meaning to ask you but forgot.”

Rey nodded, “Yeah,” she shut the classroom door and pulled Finn away from it, “Jabba is dead,” Finn grinned but she shook her head at him, “It’s good, but that’s not the important part, or, well, obviously it is important, it’s brilliant, but that’s not the bad bit.”

“Okay,” Finn said slowly, grin fading.

Rey took a deep breath, “It looks like… It is probable that Hux is involved with whomever got Jabba to take me.”

“ _ HE WHAT _ ?” Finn yelled furiously. 

Rey caught hold of him before he could get to the door, “You need to be quiet, Finn,” she told him quickly, hoping she could get him to understand before someone came to investigate the shouting, “Hux doesn’t know we know and we currently don’t have any evidence. Luke and the others teachers know and have told us to stay away from him. For now, he needs to be watched so we can figure out his place in all of this, and hopefully find out who the hell is pulling his strings.”

Finn made a frustrated noise in his throat but nodded all the same, “I fucking knew there was something wrong with him.”

Rey forced a smirk, hoping to lighten Finn’s mood a little before they hit the refectory, “Yeah, but there always was.”

Finn’s lips curved up a little and his shoulders relaxed somewhat, “So, who else knows?”

“Luke will have told Leia and Han, then just the Operation Peanut team, apart from Poe. Kylo was going to try and tell him, but would have to wait till they’re alone, so if you see him first, tell him. Then we’re all up to speed.”

They left the classroom and started for the refectory again, Finn shot her a grin, “I’m looking forward to fencing now.”

Rey chuckled.

 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo’s morning had not been a happy one. He was tired and irritable and wanted to be at school about as much as a bear in hibernation wanted waking early. In fact, hibernation sounded perfect right now, so long as it involved Rey and a bed.

The other Knights seemed little better, alternating between fidgeting or trying not to fall asleep at their desks.  

“At least we have a free period after Drama,” Zainmar said as they made their way to the refectory for lunch.

“Yeah, I could do with a nap,” Leonmar said, voice as sleepy as Kylo felt.

Kylo sighed, “Me too, but I’ll head to the gym, I badly need to blow off some steam.”

Ingalan nodded, “I’ll join you, sitting around all day has made me twitchy.”

“Fencing?” Javiell asked, “I’d be up for that.”

“Yeah, me too,” Zainmar chimed in.

Leonmar groaned, “Fine, I’ll join you too, maybe it’ll wake me up.”

The others laughed, Leonmar hadn’t been able to smoke much since they’d returned home and he was testy as a result. While they had been in the South he’d  got used to smoking whenever he wanted and he was having trouble adjusting... that made Kylo think of Hux and he clenched his fists, angrily chewing the inside of his cheek as he tried to keep himself together.

Then he felt Rey coming towards them and he picked up his pace so he could get to her sooner. They met just inside the refectory and Kylo ignored the other students around them as he took her face in his hands and kissed her. 

< _ Kylo! _ > He could feel her embarrassment at such a public display but right then he didn’t care. 

< _ Did something happen? _ >

He sighed inwardly and let her face go, sliding his hands to her waist, “No, nothing happened. I just missed you.”

Her cheeks were flushed, she gave him a disbelieving look and he smiled reassuringly, “I had a shitty morning and was just thinking about… something that made me angry, that’s all.”

She nodded in understanding, “I suppose we’ll get used to it again, but it’s going to take a while, I guess.” She took his hand, “Come on, let’s get food.”

< _ I didn’t get a chance to tell Poe yet, _ > he sent as they both selected stew and warm rolls.

< _ I told Finn, so he may get to Poe before you, he’ll let me know if he does, but if a chance comes along, take it, _ > Rey replied. Kylo nodded his agreement as they went and joined the others on their table.

The Operation Peanut team, (they  _ really _ needed to come up with another name,) were all fairly subdued. Poe’s friends chatted normally though, making them seem less removed from the other students in the refectory than they would have been if they were dining alone.  

The other girls seemed to only be capable of talking about the upcoming dance, and he had to tune them out as they were getting more annoying by the second. Their free period couldn’t come soon enough.

Rey’s hand found his under the table and squeezed, < _ It’s looking less wet outside, maybe we’ll get to stay together tonight? _ >

< _ Light, I hope so, _ > he sent as he squeezed back, < _ Though I warn you now, you won’t do much sleeping. _ > He didn’t have to look at her to know she blushed, and a little smirk drew his lips upward.

< _ You are mean, Kylo Ren. I will make you suffer for it, _ > she sent back as she took a sip of water, looking anywhere but at him.

< _ I suffer every moment you have clothes on, _ > he sent back, then couldn't help grinning as she choked on her drink, though he did pat her on the back too.

“You okay there, Peanut?” Finn asked as Rey coughed.

“Water went down the wrong way,” she gasped at him.

Finn raised his eyebrow as he looked at Kylo, who changed his grin to an appropriate expression of solicitousness and patted Rey on the back again.

If it didn’t stop raining tonight, he was going to be _ pissed. _

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

By the time it came to fencing, Rey was more than ready for it. Her muscles were restless and she longed to do something physical and straight forward. There had been too much sitting still and thinking today, she needed to switch her mind off and let her body take over.

She had caught a few glimpses of Hux today, but they had been fleeting and she hoped to get rid of some of her tension during fencing, before she came across him properly…  _ Light _ , how could they have missed something so obvious? Perhaps it was because it had been _ too  _ obvious? Like a double bluff… she shook her head at herself as she and Finn entered the studio, it was time to switch off her brain and just do what came naturally.

The chatter in the room died down when the other students noticed she and Finn. Finn shot her a look and they moved into an empty space to warm up together, both a little nervous of being asked awkward questions. So far their fellow year 11’s hadn’t had much chance to pester them, but the atmosphere in fencing tended to be a little more fluid than in a normal classroom.

“Any chance Luke will let me partner with you?” Finn muttered as they stretched.

Rey shrugged, “You could ask.” It would be harder to lose herself in the exercise if she were constantly avoiding answering questions.

Finn was just straightening up to go and ask Luke, when Luke called the class to order and they went and stood with the others.

“Alright everyone, class today will be a little different. Because the weather over the weekend was so awful, I’ve decided to forgo sparring in favour of some footwork, I imagine you all didn’t do much over the last few days, so let’s get that blood pumping and those muscles moving. There will be no need for your masks and you may remove your jackets.”

Rey was a little disappointed, but the drills Luke got them to do worked her muscles to a pleasing burn and would improve her footwork when fencing. It also meant there was no time for chatter.

As they warmed down, she asked Finn if he still wanted practice. Finn laughed, “After that? Hell, no. I am done, I need a coffee and a nap after that. Let’s leave it for another day.”

Rey rolled her eyes at him, “I guess we do still have homework to do, but I’m almost done so you can copy mine if you like.”

“I’ll pretend I didn’t just hear that,” Luke said behind them and they both jumped a little, Rey wincing slightly in embarrassment. “Our trip seems to have interested quite a few people in learning the staff. I wondered if you would be kind enough to give a demonstration, Rey? It will be on Wednesday after lessons.”

“Oh,” Rey shifted uneasily, “Um, okay?”

Luke gave her a gentle smile, “I’d do all the talking, you could do a kata and then maybe spar with me briefly, so they can see it put into practice.”

Rey wasn’t the sort of person who liked performing for people, but she didn’t want to disappoint Luke, and the demonstration may go some way to bolstering their story about her absence last week. She nodded, “I can do that.”

“Excellent, thank you. It’ll be in this studio, just wear what you normally would for MMA class, I will schedule it so you have time to properly warm up first.”

Rey wanted to ask him if there had been any more news about the circumstances surrounding Jabba’s death and if there had been anything found in Hux’s room when Mara searched, but there were too many ears around them at the moment, so she just nodded again and he stepped away.

“You look a little sick, Peanut,” Finn observed with a smile.

Rey grimaced and shrugged, “I don’t like having an audience.”

“You had one when you and Kylo had that fight the other Monday, you were fine then.”

Rey cocked her head as she thought back, “I guess I was.”

“You just need to get in the zone, then you’re fine.” Finn flashed his teeth at her, “Just try not to seriously hurt Luke, I kinda like him, even if his jokes never land.”

Rey snorted, “ Luke  _ won _ last time.”

Finn shrugged, still grinning.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

The fencing in their free period had taken the edge off, but Kylo and the Knights decided to hit the gym after classes as they still felt the need and it had been too long since they’d trained. He had invited Rey to join them, but she’d opted to finish her homework with Finn.

They hadn’t really ever talked about school work - there had always been more important things to discuss or do, but now he thought about it, this was probably a hard adjustment for her education wise, on top of everything else.

He had read her file, her school attendance had been spotty at best and he doubted any school she had been to was up to the standards here anyway.

So rather than trying to persuade her to join them, he had just told he he’d see her at dinner. He didn’t like it, but he didn’t want to keep her back.

His own grades were fine. Of course, his mother didn’t think so (if it wasn’t a line of A’s she wasn’t happy) but he was doing well in the subjects he liked and passing in the subjects he didn’t, (apart from Drama, but in his head, that didn’t count).

After doing cardio and weights, he migrated to a punchbag, imagined Hux’s face and had at it. It felt good to let go and just punch something and he lost himself for a while.

“Kylo!”

Kylo turned, blinking a little as he came out of his violent trance to see Ingalan holding out a bottle of water.

As he started to take off his gloves Ingalan let out a little sigh, “You were in deep then, I’d said your name a fair few times.”

Kylo flicked sweat soaked hair out of his eyes, “Sorry,” he said as he took the water.

Ingalan shrugged, “Don’t be, it looks like you needed that.”

Kylo grinned, nodding, “So much.”

“Warm down, then food?” Zainmar asked as he wandered towards them from the weights section.

 

After dinner Kylo cuddled up with Rey on a sofa. She had finished her homework, and he was determined to keep hold of her for the rest of the evening. It was still raining outside, so once again they would be sleeping alone. He hated it.

< _ Finn got to Poe, so you don’t need to worry about talking to him, _ > she sent as she rested her head under his chin. < _ Have you seen Han or Luke to talk to? _ >

Kylo shook his head slightly, < _ No. I have a session booked with Leia tomorrow, so I can ask for an update then, though she may not give me one _ .> He felt her inwardly wince in sympathy and planted a soft kiss on her hair.

< _ My session is on Wednesday, _ > she sent morosely, < _ I’d rather take another go at Rancor. _ >

Kylo frowned, “< _ Who’s Rancor? _ > Again he felt her wince, this time for another reason.

< _ Oh, ah, he was the guy Jabba had me fight _ .>

Kylo concentrated on his breathing and willed his anger away, Jabba was dead, and he couldn’t hurt Rey ever again.

< _ Are you okay? _ > she sounded guilty, anxious.

Kylo sighed and pulled her chin up so her lips met his, < _ I am now, _ > he smiled slightly against her lips, then kissed her again, savouring each taste and touch, storing the memories away so when they had to say goodnight, he at least had a vivid memory of her, hoping it would be a talisman against bad dreams.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This too me longer than it should have (sorry life keeps interfering), and I don’t really like it. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	102. Not A Monster

 

As Rey settled into her nest that night, she realised that perhaps sleeping with her knife underneath her pillow may now be a bad idea. With the girls on the same floor she didn’t want to risk a repeat of what she had done to Kylo’s face. 

Now she knew Hux was involved in all this, her body would probably be on high alert for a while. So she secreted it under her mattress, still within easy reach but far enough away that she would be more awake before she used it.  _ Hopefully _ anyway.

She would have loved to go out climbing, but the weather seemed determined to keep her in her room at night, on her own.

Her sleep was short and full of bad dreams, they weren’t nightmares but they were unpleasant nonetheless. When she awoke, she could remember nothing other than that they hadn’t been nice, and waking was a relief. 

Once again she settled down in her nest with her goggle lamp and read one of her science textbooks, losing herself in the details as the dark night stretched on.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo had another restless night. When he finally admitted defeat and sat up it was still only 5am. This was getting intolerable.

He sighed and stretched, then padded softly down to the kitchen to make himself some coffee. He could feel Rey was awake but was fairly certain if she came down now he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off her and someone would see them. Probably Stold, the man only ever appeared at the wrong moment.

He made a large mug of instant coffee so he wouldn’t have to wait for the machine to brew, then went back up to his room. It was cold, the air temperature had dropped dramatically and he gratefully burrowed under his duvet, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders as he sipped his drink.

There was a soft tap on his door and Ingalan poked his head in, “Can’t sleep either?”

Kylo grunted and jerked his head for Ingalan to come in, making space on the bed for the other boy who had his own blanket wrapped around his shoulders.

“I guess this is to be expected,” Ingalan mused as he settled himself, “I mean, after everything that happened, readjustment wasn’t going to be easy, was it?”

Kylo sighed and nodded, “No, I guess not. Are you having bad dreams too?”

Ingalan nodded, “Yeah… but I think what disturbs me most, is that I don’t feel guilty… I know I killed, I’m not sure how many, but I know I did…” he trailed off, a frown on his face.

“I’m the same, though I don’t think it even disturbs me as much as it should. It was either us or them, and it worked, it wasn’t all for nothing, we got Rey back,” Kylo took a sip of coffee and Ingalan leant back against the wall, tilting his head back slightly, “I’d do it all again, no hesitation. We all would, even Finn and Poe… but we are different now, aren’t we?”

Kylo nodded, knowing it was true, “I suppose it is as Rey said, killing someone changes you, once you’ve crossed that line there is no going back… I guess it was easier because we didn’t know them, and we knew they were bad.” 

“The kill or be killed senario made it easier, and in the moment I was less aware of what I’d done, because we had a plan and had to survive, but… well, does being guiltless make us monsters?”

Kylo looked at Ingalan in surprise, he took his free arm out of his blanket and gripped Ingalan’s shoulder, “You could  _ never _ be a monster, brother. None of you could. You did what was needed to protect yourself and the others. The men that we killed were criminals, they kept slaves, they hurt Rey. What we did probably couldn’t be classed as a good deed, but it definitely wasn’t a bad one… I may have a beast inside me, my mirror-self may even call himself a monster, but I know I am not one, and if I am not, you could never be.”

Ingalan’s somber expression turned curious, “Why does your mirror call himself a monster?”

Although the Knights knew about the dreams, they didn’t know many details, Kylo couldn’t bring himself to answer Ingalan’s smile as he answered, “He killed his father, he killed Han.” Ingalan lost his smile and Kylo felt a stab of guilt, they had just got  _ off  _ the heavy stuff...

“Oh,  _ light _ , Kylo, I’m so sorry,” Ingalan breathed, guilt lacing his tone.

Kylo shook his head, “It’s not your fault…” he swallowed, “You and the Knights are the reason I am not like him… I’m lucky to have you, I’m lucky I met Rey… I’m lucky I’m not in the mirror reality, I may not feel guilty for killing those men last week, but my mirror-self kills for sport, kills just because he can. Even if he saved mirror-Rey, he is still a monster.”

Ingalan nodded, “And you are not, nor will you ever be, brother.”

They were quiet for a time and Kylo realised he had muted the bond without thinking. It was a good thing he and Rey were getting better at it, even with the disconnect of last week, being constantly affected by the each others mood was wearing… It made him wonder how she was coping with it all, did she feel guilt? He knew she did over he and the others rescuing her. Rey being Rey had wanted to do it all alone, she still wasn’t used to the fact that she was no longer on her own. But she wasn’t, and one day he would finally make her believe it.

By unspoken agreement, neither he nor Ingalan had spoken of the traitor in their midst, and he tried his best to keep his mind from turning to that red headed shit-weasel but it was proving difficult. Thankfully his thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of Javiell.

“You too? I thought after our gym session I’d be out till my alarm went off,” he grumbled as he sat down next to Ingalan and pulled his own blanket tighter around his shoulders as he settled himself.

“Bad dreams? Or just can’t sleep?” Ingalan asked him.  

Javiell shrugged slightly, “More like weird dreams that kept pushing me out of sleep, I don’t know…” he yawned, “I got pretty used to sleeping close to you guys, even though we’re only rooms apart now, I don’t know... something in the back of my mind insists you aren’t safe,” he laughed derisively at himself.

“Well,” said Ingalan carefully, “Although we got Rey back home safe and Jabba is dead, there is still the issue of whomever organised it and of course,” he glanced at Kylo, “We still have a ginger mole to deal with.”

Javiell grunted, “Indeed,” Kylo didn’t miss the quick glance Javiell also shot him, “Any more details on Jabba’s demise?”

Kylo shook his head, “No, but I have my session with Leia today, I’ll ask then.”

Javiell nodded and rubbed his face, “I don’t feel like I’ll be going back to sleep now, fancy cards?”

“May as well,” Ingalan said.

Kylo got up to get his pack just as Leonmar slunk in, hair wet and eyes bloodshot, “What happened to you?”

Leonmar pulled a face and settled on the floor with another blanket, “Tried smoking leaning out of the window,” Javiell snorted and he gave him a disgusted look before he continued, “Not my finest moment, I’ll admit,” he produced his pack of cards, “Why are you three up?”

“Can’t sleep,” Kylo responded at the same time as Ingalan said, “Bad dreams.” 

Javiell shrugged, adding, “Too twitchy.”

Leonmar just nodded and started dealing out the cards.

 

As they played, they discussed their upcoming sessions with Leia, and what to say and what to conceal. The ins and outs of who knew what made Kylo’s head ache, life had become awfully complicated.

 

They took early showers once it was a reasonable time, agreeing they all needed an extra big breakfast to make up for their lack of sleep.

They decided to poke Zainmar, to let him know they were up earlier than usual. Kylo did the honours, Zainmar grumbled about it but got up so he could join them.

Kylo and the others went downstairs for coffee and to wait for Zainmar to have a quick shower before he joined them.

Rey and Poe were already down and Kylo felt his muscles relax just seeing her. She smiled at him as he entered the reading room and voluntarily got up out of her chair so he could sit down and pull her onto his lap. 

“Another bad night?” she asked softly as she settled herself. 

Kylo nodded, “You?”

Rey shrugged, “Not great either, but I’m used to it, until you I’d never really slept well.”

Deep in its cage, the beast purred with satisfaction and Kylo felt warm all over. He pulled her to him, just relishing touching her, having her in his arms and the bond hummed with approval. 

 

The coffee he had had with breakfast was already wearing off when he went for his session with his mother. Despite folding himself awkwardly into that horrible chair he knew it would be hard to stay awake.

Leia watched him as he settled himself, a little frown marring her usually serene features. Once he was as ready as he ever would be, he looked back at her in resigned expectation.

“Your eyes are bloodshot,” she observed, Kylo just shrugged. Leia pursed her lips, “Are you not sleeping?”

Kylo shrugged again, “Not well,” he admitted, “Any more news on Jabba?”

Leia’s expression hardened and Kylo felt his expression mirror hers, but then she sighed and nodded, “Some, though a lot of it hasn’t been confirmed, the Fett’s are implicated in the assassination, and one of them is known to be dead, the other is missing. The Hutt family has posted a reward for news on his whereabouts and a vast reward for his capture,” her expression turned grim, “We all need to pray that he isn’t found alive,” her mouth twisted over such a sentiment, “because if he is, there is a possibility Rey’s name will come up.”

Kylo swallowed thickly, all the moisture in his mouth was suddenly gone, and his skin flushed with heat as he softly said, “Fuck.” 

Rather than reprimanding him for his language, Leia merely nodded, “Your father has some of his old friends keeping tabs on the situation and we will be informed of any developments… It may be that we have to hide Rey elsewhere for a time, possibly you boys too.”

Kylo nodded, his head was clearing as he started to go on alert, he sat forward in his chair, oblivious to how uncomfortable it was now, “You cannot tell Rey.” He had the fleeting gratification of seeing his mother taken by surprise before he went on, “If you tell her, she will run on her own… she already feels guilty over us going to Tatooine to get her back, if she finds out it’s possible that someone from the Hutts may come after her, she will be gone.” Saying it left a bitter taste on his tongue, but it didn’t make it less true. He knew she would leave, and she was now so good at muting the bond that he may not be able to track her. The idea of her going off alone horrified him, made his skin prickle with goosebumps and stomach flip repeatedly. The beast muttered in protest at the idea and he agreed wholeheartedly with it.

Leia sat back in her chair and nodded tightly, “I had not thought of that possibility. I will make sure Luke and Han know not to let it slip too. Light willing nothing will come of this, but it is always better to be prepared for any eventuality.” She paused for a moment to hand him a glass of water and he drank gratefully, before she carried on. “But this time is for you, to talk about what happened over the week you were away and how it has affected you. This is a safe place, nothing you say will be passed on,” she paused, then said carefully, “Right now, I am not your mother, I am here to listen and to help you understand and cope with anything you are struggling with.”

Kyo shrugged, “I'm fine,” he told her, it was worth a try.

Leia pursed her lips and folded her hands neatly in her lap, “And why do you think that?”

Kylo sighed in resignation and stuck his legs out in front of him, “Because I’m fine. Rey is safe, the others are okay and we got home,” he shrugged, “That’s it.”

A flash of exasperation flickered over Leia’s face before it settled again into her normal calm expression, “You are all home, but you need to talk about your experiences and feelings. Do not be so foolish as to think you are unaffected, Ben. Even if you genuinely think you are okay, your subconscious will be full of things that will fester and could affect you for the rest of your life if you do not try and address them now.”   
Kylo reluctantly concluded that they would be going round in circles if he didn’t give her anything, so he sighed yet again before answering, “I don’t know how many people I actually killed, there wasn’t time to stop and count... But I know I must have killed a few, wounded more, but I did it in defense of myself or the others, and I don’t feel bad about it. Our options were them or us, it made what we had to do easier…” he ran his hands through his hair as he thought, trying to think of other things to throw her way, “Most of our trip was pretty boring to be honest, we were stuck in the Falcon just driving. I didn’t like the south, I’m glad we don’t have slaves here…” he shrugged again, “I don’t know what else to say.”

Leia pursed her lips as she frowned at him, “How did it make you feel? When you hurt people?”

“I was concentrating too much on staying alive to think about how I felt. Afterwards we were just all so relieved to be alive and were concentrating so hard on staying that way that I didn’t really think about it.”

“Okay, well, I’m asking you to think about it now,” Leia was back to using her calm voice. Ironically Kylo always found that so much more irritating than her motherly one or her your-an-idiot one.

He shifted in the bloody chair, grimacing as he did, “Can you not get better chairs? It’s like an instrument of torture…” Leia just raised an eyebrow, so he gave in, “Hurting people didn’t make me feel good, but I wasn’t unhappy about it either because I knew it was necessary to rescue Rey.”

Leia’s lips thinned, then her expression turned thoughtful, “After the ambush on the way to the plane, what happened to make you so angry?”

It took Kylo a few seconds to remember, then he had to immediately swallow down bile. He looked away from his mother’s watchful face to stare at the carpet, then answered quietly, “I will  _ never _ tell anyone what I saw in that sick bastards head. Ever.”

“If it was really that bad, you need to talk about it Ben. Why should you carry such a burden alone?” 

Kylo straightened his shoulders and looked her firmly in the eye, “Because I choose to.” As Leia angrily opened her mouth, he asked, “Did Mara find anything when she searched Hux’s room?”

She ignored him of course, “Ben, you need to talk about these things! If you don’t it could lead to all sorts of problems, nothing you say will be passed on to anyone, that includes Luke and your Father.”

Kylo had had enough, if he stayed any longer he would shout at her and probably start throwing things, his lack of sleep was making it difficult to keep a hold of his temper and his mother was making it impossible.

“I’m done,” he grated out as he stood, not caring about the repercussions at this point, “You said you’d listen to me, but you haven’t, as usual. Nothing you can say will convince me to share what I saw.” He swung his bag onto his shoulder and stalked out of that infernal room, ignoring his mother as she called angrily after him.

After five minutes of standing in the rain, he went back inside, the cold had helped cool his anger a little and he didn’t like the idea of spending his next lesson completely soaked through. 

There was a soft brush on his mind as the bond warmed gently, as if Rey were caressing his forehead lightly, Kylo fully unmuted the bond.

< _ Are you okay? _ >  she sounded hesitant.

He wiped wet hair out of his face, < _ It could have been worse, but I’ve got a horrible feeling she’ll make me have another one. _ >

There was a feeling of sympathy, then amusement as she sent, < _ You could always mind trick her _ .>

Kylo could  _ hear  _ her grin. He snorted softly to himself as he wandered down the empty corridor, < _ I know it sounds awful but I am actually tempted _ .>

< _ Shit! That made me laugh and now everyone is looking at me weird. _ >

Kylo felt his lips pull up, < _ Back to work, Miss White. I’ll see you at lunch. _ >

He found the Knights in an empty classroom. This was a free period and the library was no longer there, so it was either an empty classroom or the gym. None of them had fancied morning exercise after their bad nights, well, apart from Zainmar who seemed to have slept perfectly well.

They stopped their half hearted attempt at doing homework so Kylo could update them on the situation in the south.

“So there is a Fett alive and on the run?” Javiell said into the thoughtful silence after Kylo was done. “He won’t remember it was Rey that made him do it will he?”

Kylo shrugged unhappily, “I honestly have no idea, we assumed if it worked, that they would both be killed in the process...”

“We should probably be extra watchful, I imagine he will be concentrating on hiding right now, but we can’t rule out him coming here… Have you told Rey?” Ingalan asked.

Kylo grimaced and shook his head, “No, and I won’t. I think she’d run, she wouldn’t want to endanger anyone else, you know how she is.” They all nodded.

“I’ve still got the gun,” Javiell said quietly, “If he comes, we kill him.”

Zainmar snorted softly, “Well obviously, but it would be good if we didn’t have to. Last time they were here they burned down the library almost killing two kids, and that was only so they could get Rey, this time it’ll be about revenge and the gloves will be off. I don’t even want to think about what one of them would do in the pursuit of vengeance.”

Kylo shuddered, the Fett’s sordid sick imaginings replaying once again behind his tired eyes.

The bell rang, making them all jump, then ruefully gather their things and headed to English. Kylo planned on sitting at the back and staring out of the window, that was the most he could handle right now.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
>  I'm so, so sorry about how rubbish I am being at updating. X


	103. The Second Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not going to lie, winter has been pretty bleak for various reasons and the icing on the cake of crap was really, reeeeeally bad case of writer's block. I almost deleted everything I’ve written and disappeared, so I am sorry that this is hideously late in coming and I hope it doesn’t disappoint. I’m not happy about the chapter, but I wanted to give you something, and I’m hoping it’ll get better from here...  
> Massive thanks to [Akashne](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akashne/pseuds/Akashnel)  
> for being so encouraging _and_ betaing (go check out her fics), and for taichigirl for checking up on me too ♥

Rey had been very careful to ignore everything coming through the bond during Kylo’s session with Leia. Even muted, she could feel his frustration, and it was a relief when the tension on his end eased, though she could feel the fingers of a headache beginning to clutch at her skull.

Stepping into the workshop for their mechanics lesson had her smiling though, Chewie had been waiting just inside the door, the other students giving him a wide berth and looking at her oddly as she went down on her knees and flung her arms around him.

He seemed as glad at seeing her as she was him, his tailed thumping the floor as he tried to get his body as close to her as possible, all the while grumbling happily as he licked any part of her face he could reach.

“All right, Chewie, you tart, let the poor girl up now,” Han said from somewhere - all Rey could see was Chewie.

The hound gave her one last enthusiastic lick on her ear before moving away from her so she could finally stand.

Han nodded at her, “Good to see you kiddo.”

Rey smiled a little shyly, “Thanks,” she glanced around quickly before adding quietly, “Glad you both made it back okay.”

Han nodded again, a little awkwardly, then jerked his head to the bathrooms, “Go on with you, get some trousers on and get to work.” 

Grinning, Rey flashed him a salute and went to change, eager to immerse herself in something she knew well, (most of her other lessons here were a bit of a struggle). 

She was so engrossed in what she was doing, (putting together the final pieces of the engine she’d started on a few weeks ago) that she didn’t notice the bell and almost jumped a foot in the air when Finn patted her shoulder.

“Calm down, Peanut,” Finn chortled, “It’s only me. We’re done, it’s time for food and I’m starving, so change already.”

Rey rolled her eyes, “When are you not starving? Go on ahead, I just want to finish, I’m almost done.” Finn shrugged and left her to it. 

It wasn’t long before she was wiping her hands on a rag, looking down with satisfaction at the finished article. 

“Nice work, kiddo,” Han said from behind her as Chewie lovingly shoved his head against her thigh. 

A blush warmed her cheeks as Han looked over what she had done, nodding to himself, “Perfect. But then I never thought it would be anything else.”

Her face turned scarlet now and she looked at the floor, unable to form any intelligible words as answer or even get any sound out.

After patting her briefly on the shoulder, Han said a little gruffly, “You need to go and eat, kiddo.”

Remembering it was his lunch time too, Rey blushed further and darted to the loos to change before heading to the refectory.

When she hit the outside, she found the sky a menacing black, the atmosphere was charged and she groaned as she realised there may be another storm in the offing. She did not remember the last one kindly.

_ <Are you okay?> _ Kylo’s voice in her head calmed her a little, even if it sounded worried.  _ <Finn said you were finishing something at the workshop?> _

He must have felt her flash of anxiety, Rey sighed and shook her head even though he couldn’t see her, and started walking quickly, _ <I’m fine, headed to lunch now. I think there may be a storm due…> _

_ <Do you need me to come and meet you?> _

She snorted to herself,  _ <Of course not. I’m fine, it hasn’t even started and I may be wrong anyway. I’m less than a minute away..> _

< _ Either way, you shouldn’t be alone at the moment, it may not be safe _ .> Rey was almost certain he was frowning as he sent that.

Rolling her eyes, she entered the refectory and grabbed a tray,  _ <We’d know, we’d feel something if there was danger.> _

_ <Didn’t help last time, did it?> _

Wow, he was in a shitty mood… oh, yeah, he’d had his counselling session earlier…  _ <Okay,> _ she sent a little more gently _ , <Next time I’ll get Finn to wait.> _

It had been bitter outside, so she opted for stew and a roll, joining the others at their table and slipping into the empty seat next to Kylo, who immediately laced his fingers with hers so she had to eat with one hand.

_ <I missed you too,> _ his hand was almost burning in hers, he was so warm.

He sighed contentedly as he leaned over to kiss her temple before gesturing at her food, “You need to eat.”

Rey raised her eyebrow at his commanding tone and wriggled her fingers and he reluctantly let go of her hand to rest his on her thigh.

Allowing the conversation to wash over her, Rey concentrated on eating and trying to decide if swimming with a bad headache would make it worse or not… part of her was actually looking forward to getting in the pool again. After the horrors of last week, the nervousness she normally associated with being surrounded by water seemed to be almost gone, just fluttering on the edges of her mind.

_ Headache be damned _ , she was going to swim… and anyway, in her mirror dream she’d been plunged into deep seawater and had made it out alive. A warm, shallow swimming pool was nothing.

Once she was done eating she leant against Kylo, pressing herself against him as he wrapped his arm around her. The pain in her head eased and she raised an eyebrow,  _ <Did you just heal me?> _ there was a light buzz running over her skin.

_ <Maybe,> _ she caught his lips curve a little as she looked up at him, < _ No reason why not to, no one can tell.> _

She huffed a small laugh, it was a fair point, _ <Thanks.> _

He bent to kiss the top of her head, “No problem, sweetheart.”

“Are you okay?” she murmured hesitantly, “After your… session? Do you want to talk about it?”

For a second, he tensed a little, but then sighed, “I’m fine, and there isn’t much to say about it other than it was annoying and I left early anyway.”

Not wanting to push him further, Rey just nodded, figuring if he wanted to talk about it with her, he would.

They both sat quietly together for the rest of lunch, listening as the others talked about the dance and smashball and other things that interested her not at all. 

~

 

Jess was already waiting on the sofas for her when Rey entered the gym. They grinned at each other as Jess bounced to her feet and they headed into the changing rooms.

Apart from Mechanics, the day had dragged along slowly and Rey was just itching to do something physical by now. Judging by the heavy, pregnant clouds crowding the sky, it would be raining all night, yet again.  _ Ugh. _

“If I didn’t know any better,” Jess said as they walked out to the pool, “I’d say you were excited.”

Rey smiled and shrugged her shoulders before standing under the poolside showers, “Actually, I kind of am - I had a... a dream while we were away, I got sucked into this really deep pool of seawater in a cave, but I didn’t drown! I made it to the shore all on my own.”

“Cool! So we can try getting you more out of your depth this week, if you’re game?”

The tiniest frisson of fear rippled along her spine, but Rey ignored it as she walked to the steps and down into the water, “I’m game.”

A few other people joined them in the pool this time, but they were just swimming lengths and Rey found them fairly easy to ignore. 

Jess had her do a few widths in the shallow end, practicing her breaststroke, before they tried doing a length. Her heart started beating faster when she passed out of her depth, but she kept going, Jess staying beside her all the way. When she made it to the other end, she grabbed hold of the edge with both hands, gasping a little, but ridiculously proud of herself nonetheless.

“You made it!” Jess almost yelled, treading water effortlessly and ginning widely, “Alright, once you get your breath back, I want you to swim back to the other end, sound okay?”

Rey nodded, “Yeah, I can do it.”    

And she did. 

Despite her legs trembling a little, and being giddy on adrenaline, she managed three more lengths till Jess decided it was enough for today.

“I don’t want to totally wear you out, Master Luke said you’re giving a staff demo tomorrow after school and I want to see you at your best!”

Rey groaned, “I’d forgotten,” she bit her lip, “Will there be loads of people there?”

Jess shrugged, “Not too many, I think Master Luke said it will only be available to years ten to thirteen. You’ll be fine! Don’t sweat it.”

 

The thunder started while they were changing. Rey could hear it even over the hair and swimwear dryers. She flinched after a particularly loud CRACK! that sounded as if the sky had broken.

Jess patted her on the arm, “I think we should have a sleepover tonight. We can all stay in Mari’s room, I doubt Mara would care if she knew, and it might mean you sleep okay. Maybe also add some liquid courage, huh?”

Rey shuffled her feet, suddenly awkward, “But won’t that just mean you guys don’t sleep well? There isn’t any point all of us not sleeping.”

After giving a dramatic eye roll, Jess playfully bumped her shoulder, “Don’t be silly, it’ll be fun!”

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

Kylo and the Knights had hit the gym after lessons, apart from Javiell, who had his first session with Leia. If she thought Kylo was being unforthcoming, she was in for a nasty surprise with Javiell.

That thought made his lips twitch a little as he lifted weights, unlike him, Javiell seldom lost his temper and said things he didn’t mean to. His mother may as well be talking to a stone.

He was taking a breather when Ingalan joined him at the water fountain, “It just occurred to me - I think the ginger mole still has his ear comm. We need to keep that in mind if we use them again.”

“Blood and bloody ashes!” Kylo growled, almost face-palming, “Why the hell didn’t I think of that?”

Ingalan patted him on the shoulder, “Because we didn’t have to, until Sunday night anyway, and we haven’t used them since.”

Kylo sighed and nodded, “Think we’ve only used them once anyway, when we had to get Rey out of… oh,  _ shit. _ So we assume he knows she was in my room?”

With a grimace, Ingalan nodded, “I guess so, though he doesn’t seem to have done anything about it. You’ll just have to make sure you aren’t caught out again… we could always raid his room at some point, see if we can find it…” he shook his head quickly, “But then again, maybe that isn’t such a good idea. For various reasons.”

Kylo grunted his agreement, even though it chafed, he knew Ingalan was right. This waiting to see what happened was annoying. Last week had been tense and scary but stuff had happened, they’d got shit done, made their own decisions, followed their own plans, and now, it was back to being fucking children, back to having to rely on ‘adults’ to decide what was best. It felt wrong...

Currently there wasn’t really anything he could do about it though, anything sensible at least, so here they were. If only there were a way to get into Hux’s head…

As he attacked a punchbag, he imagined cracking Hux’s skull like an egg and watching as his secrets spilled out onto the floor instead of blood. It was a surprisingly visceral image, and even a bit unsettling.

Thunder started shortly after these thoughts, the first crack making him jump slightly, which amused Zainmar no end.

Absently making a rude gesture at him, Kylo checked the bond, _ <Are you okay?> _

A little wave of chagrin reached him,  _ <Yeah, we’re done swimming and are about to head to the dorm, Jess is with me.> _

_ <Good, I’ll finish up here then come and find you… or I can leave with you now and shower in the dorm?> _

He could feel her eye roll,  _ and _ her flinch when another roll of thunder shuddered through the air,  _ <It’s okay, Kylo. We’re going to run. Take your time.> _

_ <I’ll see you soon,> _ he sent back, his skin warming even further at the prospect of pulling her onto his lap and not letting her go for the rest of the evening. 

 

The storm was raging when they left the gym, the rain coming down in stair-rods, whipped by the wind as thunder rumbled overhead and sheet lightning flashed like strobe lighting.

They arrived back to find Javiell already upstairs. To their questions of how his session went, he merely shrugged, smiled a little and said that Leia hadn’t liked what he had said and wasn’t happy that he hadn’t said more. Kylo allowed himself a real chuckle over that.

After dumping their stuff they headed downstairs again and Kylo spent the rest of the evening with Rey either on his lap or cuddled against him. He hated the way she flinched everytime thunder sounded or lighting flared outside. 

As the storm was so bad, dinner was brought to the dorm, it was just soup and sandwiches but everyone was glad not to be going outside again.

While he was glad that Rey would be spending the night with the other girls, he still wished she could be with him… and honestly the idea of them having a girly sleepover together was sort of hilarious. He just couldn’t picture it, and was secretly glad that they weren’t staying in Rey’s room in case she forgot herself and grabbed a knife whilst half asleep.

 

It was almost 9pm when the power went out. Everything was abruptly plunged into complete darkness.

Rey was off his lap in an instant and he was quick to follow her as there was a collective groan from everyone else in the common area.

Torches were lit by those who had them and Mara yelled from somewhere for everyone to stay where they were whilst she fetched some battery powered lamps.

The bond was tense, and he found Rey’s hand in the darkness; somehow, he knew he would always find her, even if all the light in the world went out.  _ <It’s just the storm, power line has probably been knocked down by a tree or something.> _

Her fingers squeezed his, _ <But what if it’s not?> _

Kylo paused, ignoring the chatter around them, and extended his senses,  _ <I can’t feel anything bad, can you?> _

There was a pause, and it was as if she pulsed somehow, similar to her light when they were in the  _ Inbetween _ ,  _ <No, neither can I.> _

He sat back down, and tugged her hand, pulling her to sit on his lap once more, “This just happens sometimes.”

Slowly, the lamps were passed around and they sat in little pools of light, occasionally made dim by the lightening. 

Most of the other girls had gone all squealy, and Kylo was amused to see that Jess had climbed onto Ingalan’s lap. He looked slightly surprised, but cuddled up to her quickly enough.

“We should tell ghost stories!” Zainmar suggested.

Javiell snorted in disgust as Leonmar rolled his eyes, “We’re not children, Zain.”

Zainmar huffed and shrugged, “Cards then?”

“How about hide and seek?” Poe offered, “Yeah, it may be childish, but so is bulldog.”

“Is there enough room though?” Rey asked doubtfully.

Poe shrugged, “It’ll probably be over quickly, but it can still be fun and we can always play more than one game.”

Finn flashed a grin, “I’m up for it.”

Kylo was amused to feel a little thrill of excitement through the bond as Rey said, “Yeah, me too.”

“But won’t it be a bit boring for the people who are found first? Like, if someone is really good at hiding the rest of us might just be twiddling our thumbs for ages?” Kenjad pointed out.

“Okay,” said Poe, “So we make it similar to bulldog - when you’re caught you help to find the others?”

“Sounds like a plan - we should start now though, cos it’s gone 9pm and the girls have to go upstairs at 10,” Brobard suggested.

Not everyone was up for it, Maritan, Kalhale, Leojova and Muhager declined, but that still left them with the five Knights, Rey, Finn, Poe, Jess, Ashtjac, Shaadr, Brobard and Kenjad.

Kylo was fairly certain it would end up being a bit of an anticlimax, but went along with the rest as Rey was clearly keen to do something other than just sitting around.

They picked cards to choose who went first and Poe got the joker, he stayed sitting with his hands over his eyes as he counted down from sixty. Kylo wondered why Poe couldn’t just keep his eyes shut but didn’t comment as they disbursed and sought out hiding places.

_ <No using the bond to find me if you get caught first,> _ Rey sent.

He rolled his eyes,  _ <Well obviously.> _

Although he’d already lost sight of her, he knew exactly where she was, well, until she muted the bond, then he could tell the general direction she was in but couldn’t pinpoint her.

Of course the girls had the advantage here, being shorter and slighter, they would be able to conceal themselves more easily. 

As they were a mix of boys and girls, upstairs was out of bounds and they had to contend with all the other students that were hanging out downstairs. No one had said you had to stay where you were though, Kylo started off in the games room as no one was using it with the lack of power. He settled himself under the pool table and waited, looking in the direction of where he thought the door was.

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Rey hadn’t ever played games inside a building before. It was a little odd, but of course if was preferable to being outside right now.

As the seeker, Poe would be using a small flashlight, so she couldn’t see this lasting long, but she did her best, scooting underneath Mara’s desk when no one was looking. It was a small space and afforded her a good view of the comings and goings in the lobby without being easily seen.

At first she had thought that playing a game would distract her from the storm, and it had for a moment, but now she was sitting still, (well crouching anyway), it was hard to ignore the howling wind and rolling thunder.

It wasn’t long before she saw Poe, his face lit by his torch as he made his way through the lobby, looking behind the sofas, finding Shaadr behind the long curtains, and Kenjad in the cupboard behind Mara’s desk. 

A little adrenaline filtered through her as he got closer to where she hid, but he didn’t look under the desk, and he and the others moved on.

Once she was sure they were out of sight, she scooted out from under the desk and scurried over to the large window and slipped behind the curtains, making sure her boots didn’t stick out at the bottom.

Perhaps it was luck, or more likely misfortune, but she hadn’t been behind the curtain for long when she heard Hux’s voice drifting closer. From the sound of it, he and some of his minions were settling on the sofa in front of her.

It could be the perfect screen - she doubted Poe would go near him, but it also meant she had to listen to him talking.

It did occur to her that jumping out and shouting “BOO!” would be quite funny, but if she did that, she may end up shouting “Traitor!” instead and rebreaking his nose before ripping into his mind.

So she suffered in silence. The vague hope that he would reveal any secrets about who was pulling his strings and why, proved to be a vain one. 

Hux was oddly quiet, his lackeys held up most of the conversation, he made a few comments, gave a few opinions, which of course they all agreed with, but otherwise didn’t say much. For some reason, Rey found this unsettling.

After a while, he abruptly told them all to leave him, there was a pause, then, “I know you’re back there  _ scavenger _ ; eavesdropping is the height of rudeness you know.”

Rey felt her eyes go wide and she grit her teeth, taking a deep breath before hissing, “I wasn’t eavesdropping, I’m hiding. I was here before you anyway.”

There was a light huff of a laugh, “Ah, I’ve seen your lot going back and forth a few times now. A little old for hide and seek aren’t you?”

She carefully folded her arms, even though he couldn’t see her, “How did you know I was even here?” she asked suspiciously, ignoring his own question.

There came a sigh and she could hear the insufferable smirk in his voice, “A good magician never reveals his tricks.”

“You’re not a fucking magician.”

Another sigh, “Always so _ rude. _ ”

“You always deserve it,” Rey scoffed incredulously,

“Really? After all I did for you last week?” there was a current of anger in his voice now.

She opened her mouth, then shut it again; this was moving onto dangerous ground, she couldn’t  tip him off. She bit the inside of her cheek then took another deep breath. She mustn’t be too accepting, forgiving, she was fairly certain that would make him suspicious too… “You never explained to me why you even came.”

“I don’t see why I should need to, why isn’t it enough that I did?”

There were many responses she wanted to give, both verbal and physical, but she discarded them all, just answering, “Because I don’t trust you.”

The curtain twitched aside slightly, and there he stood, looking down on her, his face barely visible in the shadows, his eyes reflecting the lightning that scorched the sky. One of his hands came to hover near her cheek, but before he touch her or say anything more, she slipped past him, shaking off the hand that briefly touched her arm.

As she trotted away back to the common area, she unmuted the bond.

_ <Are you okay?> _ Kylo sent, as she went to sit with Maritan and the other non-players.

_ <I’m fine. Got tired of hiding and back in common room.> _

“Ooo! Rey, you’re the last one, they’re still looking,” Maritan laughed as Rey settled beside her.

Rey shrugged and forced a grin in reply, “I got bored!”

“Well, it’s almost time to go upstairs anyway, lets go and tell the others you’re done and I think we should raid the cupboards for chocolate. If we’re doing a sleepover, we are doing it right.”

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

 

How it was that twelve people couldn’t find one person in an enclosed space, was beyond him. Kylo thought about probing the bond a tiny bit, but if Rey found out he cheated, he’d never hear the end of it. 

They concluded Rey must be moving around when they were out of sight, as he and probably the others had done, but he would have thought she’d be easier to find that this.

As time ticked on he was aware of some odd emotions coming from her, but didn’t want to go further. And what was even more annoying was that Hux was sitting in the lobby looking particularly pleased for some reason, smirking everytime Kylo caught his eye. It made him wonder if Rey was hiding in the lobby and Hux had seen her, but they searched everywhere and got nothing, apart from the vaguest trace of her perfume underneath Mara’s desk.

Then she unmuted the bond, though she still had some walls up, which made him uneasy,  _ <Are you okay?> _

_ <I’m fine. Got tired of hiding and back in common room.> _

He frowned, clearly she wasn’t fine. He gestured to the Knights who were halfheartedly searching the reading room again, “Rey’s back in the common room, we’re done.”

“So where the hell was she?” Zainmar asked.

Kylo shrugged, “She didn’t say.” He noticed Hux was no longer in the lobby, it was suspicious somehow.

They found Rey in the kitchen, she gave them a tight smile, as Maritan handed her snacks to put in a bag. 

Kylo ignored the others and took the bag from her, passing it to Kenjad who had just joined them, so he could fold Rey into his arms,  _ <Something happened. Tell me.> _

Sighing a little, she melted into his embrace,  _ <I was hiding behind the curtains in the lobby and got stuck behind bloody Hux, and somehow he knew I was there…> _

No fucking wonder the weaselly cretin had looked so bloody smug… and just how did he know Rey had been there? He’d scanned the curtains himself and hadn’t noticed any signs someone was behind them…  _ <Were you were under Mara’s desk at one point? I could smell your perfume, maybe he could too?> _

_ <I was… but that is really creepy if that’s how he knew.> _

Kylo could only agree.

“So where were you, Peanut?” came Finn’s voice, and they broke apart a little.

“Not telling!” her grin came a little easier now.

There was general, good natured indignation over this, but she wouldn’t budge an inch.

 

The downstairs clocks chimed the hour, and Kylo sighed in resignation as the other girls gathered their things and made for the stairs.

“See you tomorrow, I guess.”

“I guess,” Rey sounded as frustrated as he was.

Tightening his grip on her, he kissed her goodnight, briefly considering trying to bundle her upstairs unseen, before regretfully accepting that that was a bad idea.

_ <Hey, it’s gotta stop raining at some point soon, right?> _ Rey was trying for levity, but sounded adorably concerned.

Kylo shrugged, “That’s anyone’s guess, I’m afraid,” he let her go and she grabbed a glass of water before they headed for the stairs.

“I still can’t quite believe this much water exists, it’s weird.” 

“You are going to lose your shit when it snows then,” Zainmar said from behind them.

Rey rolled her eyes at him before quickly kissing Kylo again and starting up the stairs.

He watched her go, unhappy, but at least with the reassurance that she wasn’t alone with the storm this time.

 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are interested, I did a reading of a short oneshot, you can listen to it here: [The Warning In The Wind](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9xIqKk9Sfk&t=11s)

**Author's Note:**

> I am a Luddite- please let me know if i’ve tagged things wrongly or anything else.  
> And please let me know what you think…  
> There are some nods to other books/films/lyrics, see if you can spot them!


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